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master_n husband_n servant_n wife_n 9,371 5 6.6651 4 true
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ID Title Author Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication) STC Words Pages
A62954 Topsie-turvy, hey-down-derry, or, The colledge of fools display'd and their capps tost at tennis in a jovial discourse, betwixt Merry Andrew and Poor Robin : in which, with other varieties : Merry Andrew to the life discovers the several humours, tricks and devices with which some folk use to delight themselves. 1672 (1672) Wing T1908A; ESTC R7740 14,776 18

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to make a Nun break out of a Cloister Others tell a Tale as if they were making of a Bridge of Words betwixt Lambeth Marsh and Greenwich Park Others speak as if they had a Mint going in their Mouths and only wanted a Stamp to Figure their words Others speak as if their words were made of Wild Hops such mens Tongues run alwayes posting and their Wits come haulting after three spits and a stride such a Wit Will Summers had King Henry the Eights Jester and such a one no disparagement to you you may have for ought I know my Merry Friend Andrew Thus having satisfied your Request now give me leave to ask you this Question Why do you abuse your self so as to appear in so strange a Dress M. A. Lend me your Ears Robin and I 'le tell you not those Ears that you carry to Church with you when you go so seldom thither I mean those you carry on Worky dayes abroad with you such as are wont to be prickt up to Juglers Fools Buffoons and Jack Puddings of my Trade such as our Friend Midas once gave to Pan and now I le Inform you What is all this Life but a kind of a Comedy though some mens Parts are more Tragical than others do not men walk often up and down in other mens disguises and so act their respective Parts till the Property Man brings them back to the Tyring House he that had the Robes of a King puts on the Rags of a Beggar Thus are all things represented by the Counterfeit and yet without this there were no Living though by my Troth I my self when I look upon my strange Attire though I set my Countenance against it can hardly abstain from Laughter which renders me more than a little confident that in that strange Mode I please the People through whom with a Periwig in better Clothes I make my Escape for otherwise they would stop and stare upon me as if I were an Owle or crowd me to death if they did not tear off my Limbs were they loose to go with them to the Ale-House or the Tavern P. R. You have answered me this Quere but if I may presume so far I shall seriously request you my dear Andrew to acquaint me with some part of your Education M. A. This is the only Question I have hitherto disliked from you as I shall not go about to define what I am I shall only say according to the old Proverb that he that lives furthest from his Neighbours may praise himself I came of honest sufficient Parents not such as the Undutiful Spaniard Lazerillo speaks of at the beginning of his Book And please your Worships my Father was a Miller and my Mother a Bawd and for my Education as to Learning it had been better if I had not plaid the Truant when I should have gone to School Thus Robin being born I believe there 's few will think that I did begin the World as other Children usually do with crying which if I did it was so Low that no body heard me For I straight perched up and smiled upon my Mother and have continued Laughing ever since and made others merry but if you should demand of me who they are I shall tell you plainly that it would be as simple a Question as this you asked me last and if you have a mind to know who my followers are that you so often perceive about me you are not in the least the likelier to be the wiser for me P. R. Here 's Merry Andrew a whole slash to you bring another Pot here I hope you are more your self than to take Exceptions at a Question that I meant nothing but harmless mirth in the asking of it if you do you know your place best in the Colledge of Fools M. A. Here 's to you again the same measure no by St. Hughes bones the Shoe-makers Patron not I in the least P. R. I 'le take your word for it and venture further upon your good Disposition Let me embrace you Andrew M. A. And I you Robin we begin to be merry about the Gills I could sing Fishes that Tipple in the Deep P. R. As I love this arm-ful of Flesh so I have a care of your Soul Before you sing out your merry Ditty What think you of the Lawfulness of your Profession M. A. I do take it to be as Lawful as yours of making of Almanacks and merry Books which I will vindicate and when I have done I 'le be so civil to you as not to put you to the trouble for your own Apologie for if I clear mine yours may pass scot-free without any danger of Cannon-shot P. R. I shall not fail Andrew to prick up my Ears and attend your Discourse with my most serious thoughts M. A. Then have at it as they use to say Tooth and Nail Howsoever as the Holy Longing Sister for Pig in Bartholomew Fair desired of the Elder her Brother Busie I will endeavour to make this Case of Conscience as Lawful as possibly I can First then tell me what part of a Man's Life is that that is not pensive and unpleasant unless it be seasoned with Pleasure that is to say Folly For according to the old Proverb Folly is the only thing that keeps Youth at a stay and Age afar off and many are so far from being Wise that they delight to be worshipped with Sports and Gambols so provident hath the great Parent of Mankind Nature been that there should not any thing be without this mixture or seasoning of Folly to be given up to the will of our passions that the Life of Man might not be altogether disconsolate So that as I have shown that from Mirth the chief delight of Man springs insomuch that some if they can find no occasion for Laughter they hire Parasites Flatterers Fools or Jesters whose ridiculous discourse might put by the crabbedness of the more serious Employments of their Minds in their transactions of weighty Affairs For to what purpose were it to clog our Stomacks with Dainties Junkets and the like stuff unless our Eyes and Ears nay our whole Minds were likewise entertained with Jests Merriments and Laughter to delight them to Effect which for their better diversion many of the most serious and studious persons accustome themselves to see Comedies and the more aiery sort of people that have less Wit and less Money visit me and see Puppet Playes For the greatest part of Mankind are Fools and there is not one that dotes not in many things In fine Mirth is so necessary to make up all Society and manners of Life both delightful and lasting that otherwise neither would the People long endure their Governours nor the Wife her Husband nor the Master his Foot-man nor the Servant his Master nor the Scholar his Tutor nor any Friend one another But now Robin perhaps you think I have said all but you shall as briefly as I can express them