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well_o hodge_n ¶_o be_v not_o well_o bless_v gammer_n to_o escape_v the_o scour_v and_o have_v ben_fw-mi there_o then_o have_v ben_fw-mi dress_v be_v like_a as_o ill_a by_o the_o mass_n as_o gaffer_n vicar_n baily_n ¶_o marry_o sir_n here_o be_v a_o sport_n alone_o i_o look_v for_o such_o a_o end_n if_o diccon_n have_v not_o play_v the_o knave_n this_o have_v be_v soon_o amend_v my_o gammer_n here_o he_o make_v a_o fool_n and_o dress_v she_o as_o she_o be_v and_o good_a wife_n chat_v he_o set_v to_o school_n till_o both_o part_n cry_v alas_o and_o d._n rat_n be_v not_o behind_o while_o chat_v his_o crown_n do_v pare_v i_o will_v the_o knave_n have_v be_v stark_o blind_a if_o hodge_n have_v not_o his_o share_n hodge_n ¶_o c_o be_o meet_o well_o speed_v already_o amongst_o c_o be_o dress_v like_o a_o colt_n and_o have_v not_o have_v the_o better_a wit_n have_v be_v make_v a_o colt_n baily_n ¶_o sir_n knave_n make_v haste_n diccon_n be_v here_o fetch_v he_o wherever_o he_o be_v chat_v ¶_o fie_o on_o the_o villain_n fie_o fie_o that_o make_v we_o thus_o agree_v gurton_n ¶_o fie_o on_o he_o knave_n with_o all_o my_o heart_n now_o fie_o and_o fie_o again_o d._n rat._n ¶_o now_o fie_o on_o he_o may_v i_o best_o say_v who_o he_o have_v almost_o slay_v baily_n ¶_o lo_o where_o he_o come_v at_o hand_n belike_o he_o be_v not_o fare_n diccon_n hear_v be_v two_o or_o three_o thy_o company_n can_v not_o spare_v diccon_n ¶_o god_n bless_v you_o and_o you_o may_v be_v bless_v so_o many_o all_o at_o once_o chat_v ¶_o come_v knave_n it_o be_v a_o good_a deed_n to_o geld_v thou_o by_o cock_n bone_n see_v not_o thy_o handiwork_n sir_n rat_n can_v you_o forbear_v he_o diccon_n ¶_o a_o vengeance_n on_o those_o hand_n light_v for_o my_o hand_n come_v not_o near_o he_o the_o horsen_a priest_n have_v lift_v the_o pot_n in_o some_o of_o these_o alewife_n chair_n that_o his_o head_n will_v not_o serve_v he_o belike_o to_o come_v down_o the_o stair_n baily_n ¶_o nay_o soft_a thou_o may_v not_o 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such_o a_o old_a fool_n wit_n to_o save_v his_o ear_n he_o show_v himself_o herein_o you_o see_v so_o very_a a_o cox_n the_o cat_n be_v not_o so_o mad_o allure_v by_o the_o fox_n to_o run_v into_o the_o snare_n be_v set_v for_o he_o doubtless_o for_o he_o leap_v in_o for_o mouse_n and_o this_o sir_n john_n for_o madness_n d._n rat._n ¶_o well_o and_o you_o shift_v no_o better_o you_o losel_n lyther_z and_o lazy_a i_o will_v go_v near_o for_o this_o to_o make_v you_o leap_v at_o a_o dasye_z in_o the_o king_n name_n master_n bailie_n i_o charge_v you_o set_v he_o fast_o diccon_n ¶_o what_o fast_o at_o card_n or_o fast_o on_o sleep_v it_o be_v the_o thing_n i_o do_v last_v d._n rat._n ¶_o nay_o fast_o in_o fetters_n false_a varlet_n according_a to_o thy_o deed_n baily_n ¶_o master_n doctor_n there_o be_v no_o remedy_n i_o must_v entreat_v you_o needs_o some_o other_o kind_n of_o punishment_n d._n rat._n ¶_o nay_o by_o all_o hallows_n his_o punishment_n if_o i_o may_v judge_n shall_v be_v 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the_o needle_n will_v be_v get_fw-mi diccon_n ¶_o no_o hodge_v by_o the_o same_o token_n you_o where_o that_o time_n beshit_v for_o fear_n of_o hobgoblin_n you_o wot_v well_o what_o i_o mean_v as_o long_o as_o it_o be_v sense_n i_o fear_v i_o yet_o you_o be_v scarce_o clean_a baily_n ¶_o well_o master_n rat_n you_o must_v both_o learn_v and_o teach_v we_o to_o forgive_v since_o diccon_n have_v confession_n make_v &_o be_v so_o clean_o shrive_v if_o you_o to_o i_o consent_v to_o amend_v this_o heavy_a chance_n i_o will_v enjoin_v he_o here_o some_o open_a kind_n of_o penance_n of_o this_o condition_n where_o you_o know_v my_o fee_n be_v twenty_o penny_n for_o the_o bloodshed_n i_o be_o agree_v with_o you_o here_o to_o dispense_v you_o shall_v go_v quite_o so_o that_o you_o grant_v the_o matter_n now_o to_o run_v to_o end_v with_o mirth_n among_o we_o all_o even_o as_o it_o be_v begin_v chat_v ¶_o say_v yea_o master_n vicar_n and_o he_o shall_v sure_o confess_v to_o be_v your_o dotter_z and_o all_o we_o that_o be_v here_o present_a will_v love_v you_o much_o the_o better_a d._n rat._n ¶_o my_o part_n be_v the_o worst_a but_o since_o you_o all_o here_o on_o agree_v go_v even_o to_o master_n bailie_n let_v it_o be_v so_o for_o i_o baily_n ¶_o how_o say_v thou_o diccon_n be_v content_a this_o shall_v on_o i_o depend_v diccon_n ¶_o go_v to_o m._n bailie_n say_v on_o your_o mind_n i_o know_v you_o be_v my_o friend_n baily_n ¶_o then_o mark_v you_o well_o to_o recompense_v this_o thy_o former_a action_n because_o thou_o have_v offend_v all_o to_o make_v they_o satisfaction_n before_o their_o face_n here_o kneel_v down_o and_o as_o i_o shall_v the_o teach_v for_o thou_o shall_v take_v on_o oath_n of_o hodge_n leather_n breach_n first_o for_o master_n doctor_n upon_o pain_n of_o his_o curse_n where_o he_o will_v pay_v for_o all_o thou_o never_o draw_v thy_o purse_n and_o when_o you_o meet_v at_o one_o pot_n he_o shall_v have_v the_o first_o pull_v and_o thou_o shall_v never_o offer_v he_o the_o cup_n but_o it_o be_v full_a to_o good_a wife_n chat_n thou_o shall_v be_v swear_v even_o on_o the_o same_o wise_n if_o she_o refuse_v thy_o money_n once_o never_o to_o offer_v it_o twice_o thou_o shall_v be_v bind_v by_o the_o same_o here_o as_o thou_o do_v take_v it_o when_o thou_o may_v drink_v of_o free_a cost_n thou_o never_o forsake_v it_o for_o gammer_n gurton_n sake_n again_o swear_v shall_v thou_o be_v to_o help_v she_o to_o her_o needle_n again_o if_o it_o do_v lie_v in_o thou_o and_o likewise_o be_v bind_v by_o the_o virtue_n of_o that_o to_o be_v of_o good_a abere_z to_o gib_n her_o great_a cat_n last_o of_o all_o for_o hodge_n the_o oath_n to_o scan_v thou_o shall_v never_o take_v he_o for_o fine_a gentleman_n hodge_n ¶_o come_v on_o fellow_n diccon_n be_fw-mi even_o with_o thou_o now_o baily_n ¶_o thou_o will_v not_o stick_v to_o do_v this_o diccon_n i_o trow_v diccon_n ¶_o no_o by_o my_o father_n skin_n my_o hand_n down_o i_o lie_v it_o loâ—e_a as_o i_o have_v promise_v i_o will_v not_o denay_v it_o but_o hodge_n take_v good_a heed_n now_o thou_o do_v not_o beshit_v i_o and_o give_v he_o a_o good_a blow_n on_o the_o buttock_n hodge_n ¶_o gog_o heart_n thou_o false_a villain_n do_v thou_o bite_v i_o baily_n ¶_o what_o hodge_n do_v he_o hurt_v the_o or_o ever_o he_o begin_v hodge_n ¶_o he_o thrust_v i_o into_o the_o buttock_n with_o a_o bodkin_n or_o a_o pin_n i_o say_v gammer_n gammer_n gammer_n ¶_o how_o now_o hodge_n how_o now_o hodge_n ¶_o god_n mate_z gammer_n gurton_n gammer_n ¶_o thou_o be_v mad_a i_o trow_v hodge_n ¶_o will_v you_o see_v the_o devil_n gammer_n gammer_n ¶_o the_o devil_n son_n god_n bless_v we_o hodge_n ¶_o chould_fw-mi i_o be_v hang_v gammer_n gammer_n ¶_o marry_o se_fw-la you_o may_v dress_v we_o hodge_n ¶_o have_v it_o by_o the_o mass_n gammer_n gurton_n ¶_o what_o not_o my_o needle_n hodge_n hodge_n ¶_o your_o needle_n gammer_n your_o needle_n gammer_n ¶_o no_o fie_o do_v but_o dodge_v hodge_n ¶_o cha_fw-mi find_v your_o needle_n gammer_n here_o in_o my_o hand_n be_v it_o gammer_n ¶_o for_o all_o the_o love_n on_o earth_n hodge_n let_v i_o see_v it_o hodge_n ¶_o soft_a gammer_n gammer_n ¶_o good_a hodge_n hodge_n ¶_o soft_a i_o say_v tarry_v a_o while_n gammer_n ¶_o nay_o sweet_a hodge_n say_v truth_n and_o do_v not_o i_o beguile_v hodge_n ¶_o c_o be_o sure_o on_o it_o i_o warrant_v you_o it_o go_v no_o more_o astray_o gurton_n ¶_o hodge_n when_o i_o speak_v so_o fair_a will_v still_o say_v i_o nay_o hodge_n ¶_o go_v near_o the_o light_n gammer_n this_o well_o in_o faith_n good_a luck_n chwas_fw-mi almost_o undo_v it_o be_v so_o far_o in_o my_o buttock_n gurton_n ¶_o it_o be_v min_fw-mi own_o dear_a needle_n hodge_n sickerly_a i_o wot_v hodge_n ¶_o c_o be_o i_o not_o a_o good_a son_n gammer_n cham_n i_o not_o gurton_n ¶_o christ_n bless_v light_n on_o thou_o have_v make_v i_o for_o ever_o hodge_n ¶_o i_o know_v that_fw-mi i_o must_v find_v it_o else_o choud_fw-mi a_o have_v it_o never_o chat_v ¶_o by_o my_o troth_n gossip_n gurton_n i_o be_o even_o as_o glad_a as_o though_o i_o my_o owne selfe_n as_o good_a a_o turn_n have_v baily_n ¶_o and_o i_o by_o my_o conscience_n to_o see_v it_o so_o come_v forth_o rejoice_v so_o much_o at_o it_o as_o three_o needle_n be_v worth_a d._n rat._n ¶_o i_o be_o no_o whit_n sorry_a to_o see_v you_o so_o rejoice_v diccon_n ¶_o nor_o i_o much_o the_o glad_a for_o all_o this_o noise_n yet_o say_v gramercy_o diccon_n for_o spring_v of_o the_o game_n gammer_n ¶_o gramercy_o diccon_n twenty_o time_n oh_o how_o glad_a cham_n if_o that_o chould_fw-mi do_v so_o much_o your_o masterdom_n to_o come_v hither_o master_n rat_n good_a wife_n chat_v and_o diccon_n together_o cha_fw-mi but_o one_o half_a penny_n as_o far_o as_o i_o know_v it_o and_o i_o hill_n not_o rest_v this_o night_n till_o i_o bestow_v it_o if_o ever_o you_o love_v i_o let_v we_o go_v in_o and_o drink_n baily_n ¶_o i_o be_o content_a if_o the_o rest_n think_v as_o i_o think_v master_n rat_n it_o shall_v be_v best_o for_o you_o if_o we_o so_o do_v then_o shall_v you_o warm_v you_o and_o dress_v yourself_o too_o diccon_n ¶_o soft_a sir_n take_v we_o with_o you_o the_o company_n shall_v be_v the_o more_o as_o proud_a come_v behind_o they_o say_v as_o any_o go_v before_o but_o now_o my_o good_a master_n since_o we_o must_v be_v go_v and_o leave_v you_o behind_o we_o here_o all_o alone_o since_o at_o our_o last_o end_v thus_o merry_a we_o be_v for_o gammer_n gurton_n needle_n sake_n let_v we_o have_v a_o plaudite_n finis_fw-la gurton_n peruse_v and_o allow_v etc_n etc_n imprint_v at_o london_n in_o fleetstreet_n beneath_o the_o conduit_n at_o the_o sign_n of_o s._n john_n evangelist_n by_o thomas_n colwell_n 1575._o
a_o right_a pithy_a pleasant_a and_o merry_a comedy_n entitule_v gammer_n gurton_n needle_n play_v on_o stage_n not_o long_o ago_o in_o christ_n college_n in_o cambridge_n make_a by_o mr_n s._n mr._n of_o art_n imprint_v at_o london_n in_o fleetstreet_n beneath_o the_o conduit_n at_o the_o sign_n of_o s._n john_n evangelist_n by_o thomas_n colwell_n ¶_o the_o name_n of_o the_o speaker_n in_o this_o comedy_n ¶_o diccon_n the_o bedlam_n ¶_o hodge_n gammer_n gurton_n servant_n ¶_o tyb_n gammer_n gurton_n maid_n ¶_o gammer_n gurton_n ¶_o dock_n gammer_n gurton_n boy_n ¶_o dame_n chat_v ¶_o doctor_n rat_n the_o curate_n ¶_o master_n bailie_n ¶_o doll_n dame_n chattel_n maid_n ¶_o scapethrift_n master_n bailey_n servant_n ¶_o mute_n ¶_o god_n save_o the_o queen_n ¶_o the_o prologue_n as_o gammer_n gurton_n with_o many_o a_o wide_a stitch_n sit_v pesing_z and_o patch_v of_o hodge_n her_o man_n briche_z by_o chance_n or_o misfortune_n as_o she_o her_o gear_n toss_v in_o hodge_n leather_n 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pot_n of_o good_a ale_n they_o stroke_v up_o their_o plaudite_n ¶_o the_o first_o act_n the_o first_o scene_n ¶_o diccon_n diccon_n many_o a_o mile_n have_v i_o walk_v diverse_a and_o sundry_a way_n and_o many_o a_o good_a man_n house_n have_v i_o be_v at_o in_o my_o day_n many_o a_o gossip_n cup_n in_o my_o time_n have_v i_o taste_v and_o many_o a_o broche_z and_o spit_n have_v i_o both_o turn_v and_o baste_v many_o a_o piece_n of_o bacon_n have_v i_o have_v out_o of_o their_o balk_n in_o run_v over_o the_o country_n with_o long_a and_o be_v walk_n yet_o come_v my_o foot_n never_o within_o those_o door_n cheek_n to_o seek_v flesh_n or_o fish_n garlic_n onion_n or_o leek_n that_o ever_o i_o see_v a_o sort_n in_o such_o a_o plight_n as_o here_o within_o this_o house_n appear_v to_o my_o sight_n there_o be_v howl_v and_o scowl_n all_o cast_v in_o adump_o with_o whewl_v and_o pule_v as_o though_o they_o have_v lose_v a_o trump_n sigh_v and_o sob_v they_o weep_v and_o they_o wail_v i_o marvel_v in_o my_o mind_n what_o the_o devil_n they_o ail_v the_o old_a trot_n sit_v groan_v with_o alas_o and_o alas_o and_o tib_n wring_v her_o hand_n and_o take_v on_o in_o worse_a case_n with_o poor_a cock_n their_o boy_n they_o be_v drive_v in_o such_o fit_n i_o fear_v i_o the_o folk_n be_v not_o well_o in_o their_o wit_n ask_v they_o what_o they_o ail_v or_o who_o bring_v they_o in_o this_o stay_n they_o answer_v not_o at_o all_o but_o alack_o and_o wellaway_o when_o i_o see_v it_o boot_v not_o out_o at_o door_n i_o hie_v i_o and_o catch_v a_o slip_n of_o bacon_n when_o i_o see_v that_o none_o spy_v i_o which_o i_o intend_v not_o far_o hence_o unless_o my_o purpose_n fail_v shall_v serve_v for_o a_o shoeing-horn_n to_o draw_v on_o two_o pot_n of_o ale_n ¶_o the_o first_o art_n the_o second_o scene_n hodge_n diccon_n hodge_n see_v so_o c_o be_o array_v with_o dabble_v in_o the_o dirt_n she_o that_o set_v i_o to_o ditch_v i_o will_v she_o have_v the_o squirt_n be_v never_o poor_a soul_n that_o such_o a_o life_n have_v gog_o bone_n this_o filthy_a glaye_z hase_fw-mi dress_v i_o to_o bad_a god_n soul_n see_v how_o this_o stuff_n tear_n i_o be_v better_a to_o be_v a_o bearward_n and_o set_v to_o keep_v bear_n by_o the_o mass_n here_o be_v a_o gash_n a_o shameful_a hole_n indeed_o and_o one_o stitch_n tear_v further_a a_o man_n may_v thrust_v in_o his_o head_n diccon_n ¶_o by_o my_o father_n soul_n hodge_n if_o i_o shall_v now_o be_v swear_v i_o can_v not_o choose_v but_o say_v thy_o breech_n be_v foul_a be_v tear_v but_o the_o next_o remedy_n in_o such_o a_o case_n and_o hap_n be_v to_o planch_v on_o a_o piece_n as_o broad_a as_o thy_o cap_n hodge_n ¶_o gog_o soul_n man_n it_o be_v not_o yet_o two_o day_n full_o end_v since_o my_o dame_n gurton_n they_o sure_a these_o breeche_n amend_v but_o c_o be_o make_v suce_fw-la a_o drudge_n to_o trudge_v at_o every_o need_n i_o will_v rend_v it_o though_o it_o be_v stitch_v what_o sturdy_a packthread_n diccon_n ¶_o hoge_n let_v thy_o breech_n go_v and_o speak_v and_o tell_v i_o soon_o what_o devil_n ail_v gammer_n gurton_n and_o tib_n her_o maid_n to_o frown_v hodge_n ¶_o tush_o man_n thou_o be_v deceive_v it_o be_v their_o daily_a look_n they_o coure_z so_o over_o the_o coal_n their_o eye_n be_v blear_v with_o smoke_n diccon_n ¶_o nay_o by_o the_o mass_n i_o perfect_o perceive_v as_o i_o come_v hither_o that_o either_o tib_n and_o her_o dame_n have_v be_v by_o the_o care_n to_o gether_o or_o else_o as_o great_a a_o matter_n as_o thou_o shall_v short_o see_v hodge_n ¶_o now_o i_o beseech_v our_o lord_n they_o never_o better_a agree_v diccon_n ¶_o by_o gog_o soul_n there_o they_o sit_v as_o still_o as_o stone_n in_o the_o streite_z as_o though_o they_o have_v be_v take_v with_o fairy_n or_o else_o with_o some_o ill_a spirit_n hodge_n ¶_o gog_o heart_n i_o dare_v have_v lay_v my_o cap_n to_o a_o crown_n chwould_z learn_v of_o some_o prancome_z as_o soon_o as_o i_o come_v to_o town_n diccon_n ¶_o why_o hodge_n be_v thou_o inspire_v or_o do_v thou_o thereof_o here_o hodge_n ¶_o nay_o but_o i_o see_v such_o a_o wonder_n as_o i_o see_v not_o this_o vii._o year_n tom_n tankard_n cow_n be_v gog_o bone_n she_o set_v i_o up_o her_o sail_n and_o fling_v about_o his_o half_a acre_n frisk_v with_o her_o tail_n as_o though_o there_o have_v be_v in_o her_o arse_n a_o swarm_n of_o bee_n and_o have_v not_o cry_v tphrowh_o hoore_fw-mi shed_v leap_v out_o of_o his_o lees_n diccon_n ¶_o why_o hodge_n lie_n the_o cunning_a in_o tom_n tankard_n cow_n tail_n hodge_n ¶_o well_o i_o have_fw-mi hard_o some_o say_v such_o token_n do_v not_o fail_v but_o cast_v thou_o not_o till_o in_o faith_n diccon_n why_o she_o frown_v or_o where_o at_o have_v no_o man_n steal_v her_o duck_n or_o hen_n or_o geld_a gyb_v she_o cat_n diccon_n ¶_o what_o devil_n can_v i_o tell_v man_n i_o can_v not_o have_v one_o word_n they_o give_v no_o more_o heed_n to_o my_o talk_n than_o thou_o will_v to_o a_o lord_n hodge_n ¶_o i_o can_v not_o still_o but_o muse_n what_o marvellous_a thing_n it_o be_v will_fw-mi in_o and_o know_v myself_o what_o matter_n be_v amiss_o diccon_n ¶_o then_o farewell_n hodge_n a_o while_n since_o thou_o do_v inward_a haste_n for_o i_o will_v into_o the_o good_a wife_n chat_v to_o feel_v how_o the_o ale_n do_v taste_v ¶_o the_o first_o acre_n the_o thyrd_o scene_n ¶_o hodge_n tyb_n hodge_n c_o be_o aghast_a by_o the_o mass_n i_o wot_v not_o what_o to_o do_v chad_n need_n bless_v i_o well_o before_o i_o go_v they_o to_o perchance_o some_o felon_n spirit_n may_v haunt_v our_o house_n indeed_o and_o then_o chwere_fw-mi but_o at_o noddy_n to_o venture_v where_o i_o no_o need_n tyb_n ¶_o c_o be_o worse_o than_o mad_a by_o the_o mass_n to_o be_v at_o this_o stay_n c_o be_o chide_v c_o be_o blame_v and_o beat_v on_o all_o the_o hour_n on_o the_o day_n lame_v and_o hunger_n starve_v prick_v up_o all_o in_o jag_n have_v no_o patch_n to_o hide_v my_o back_n save_o a_o few_o rot_a rag_n hodge_n ¶_o i_o say_v tyb_n if_o thou_o be_v tyb_n as_o i_o trow_v sure_o thou_o be_v what_o devil_n make_v ado_n be_v this_o between_o our_o dame_n and_o thou_o tyb_n ¶_o gog_o bread_n hodge_n thou_o have_v a_o good_a turn_n thou_o warte_z not_o here_o this_o while_n it_o have_v be_v better_a for_o some_o of_o we_o to_o have_v be_v hence_o a_o mile_n my_o gammer_n be_v so_o out_o of_o course_n and_o frantic_a all_o at_o once_o that_o cock_n our_o boy_n i_o poor_a wench_n have_v feel_v it_o on_o our_o