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A68983 The court and country, or A briefe discourse dialogue-wise set downe betweene a courtier and a country-man contayning the manner and condition of their liues, with many delectable and pithy sayings worthy obseruation. Also, necessary notes for a courtier. VVritten by N.B. Gent. Breton, Nicholas, 1545?-1626? 1618 (1618) STC 3641; ESTC S104725 24,408 40

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in the Country then in the tryall of patience in the Court except the heauens highest Grace and vnder heauen our earths highest Honour make you happier in their fauours then the whole world else can make you And now what say you further vnto mee COVRT I say this to you kind Cousin that your Fathers lessons haue made you better learned then I looked for but yet let me tell you had you seene but one of our showes in our Triumphs heard one of our Songs on our solemne dayes and tasted one of our dishes in our solemne feasts you would neuer looke more on a May-game listen more to a louzy Ballad nor euer be in loue with béefe and pudding COVNT Oh Cousin stay the Bells I thinke you are deceiued for it may be that at one of these Showes I might sée the fruites of my labours and my poore Neighbours flong away in gaudes and feathers and perhaps haue a proud humour wish to be as wise as they that were no wiser then they should bée and therefore I thinke better tarry at home then trauell abroad to no better purpose Now for Songs a plaine ditty well expressed is better with vs then a fine conceit as faigned in the voyce as the matter Now for your dishes of meat I will tell you I heard my father once report it for a truth that a great man who liued where you liue sent him for a great dainty a Porpose Pye or two cold which taking very thankfully and causing the Messenger to stay dinner with him he cut one of them vp and very nicely taking out a péece of it gaue it to my Mother which she no sooner had in her mouth but it had like to haue marred all with her stomacke but shee quickly conueyed it all vnder boord which my Father séeing said why how now wife What doe you loue no good meate yes quoth she but I pray you tast of it your selfe which he no sooner did but he made as much hast out of his mouth with it as she did then did the Children likewise the same and the Seruants being by their Master offred ech one a péece of it no sooner tasted of it but they did so spit and spatter as if they had béene poysoned then he gaue a péece to his Dogge which smelt to it and left it by and by after came in a Miller and his Dogge to whom my Father inlike manner offered a péece but neither man nor dog would eate of it wherevpon my Father heartily laughing with thankes to his great Lord for his kinde token sent one of them backe againe to him with this message Commend me I pray you to my good Lord and tell him I heartily thanke his honour and tell him if either my selfe or my wife or my children or my seruants or my dog or the Miller or his dogge would haue eaten of it I would neuer haue sent one bit backe againe to him of it but it may bée that it is more wholesome then toothsome and hee may make a better friend with it so paying the messenger for his paines sent him away with his message which was no sooner deliuered but his Lord heartily laughed at it This was one of your fine dishes Another a great Lady sent him which was a little Barrell of Cauiary which was no sooner opened and taued but quickly made vp againe was sent backe with this message Commend me to my good Lady and thanke her honour and tell her we haue blacke Sope enough already but if it be any better thing I beseech her Ladyship to bestow it vpon a better friend that can better tell how to vse it Now if such be your fine dishes I pray you let me alone with my Country fare And now what say you else vnto mée COVRT I say this that Nature is no votcher and there is no washing of a blacke Moore except it bée from a little durty sweat the Oxe will weare no Socks howsoeuer his feete carry their sauour and Diogenes would bee a Dog though Alexander would giue him a kingdome and therefore though you are my kinsman I sée it is more in name then in nature thy breath smels all of Garlike and thy meat tasts all of mammaday pudding which breaking at both ends the stuffing runnes about the Pot And since I sée thou art like a Milstone that will not easily bee stirred I will leaue thee to thy folly till I finde thée in a better humour for I sée the Musique of thy minde hangeth all vpon the base string Farewell COVNT Nay soft a while let me not be in your debt for an ill word or two I see truth is no lyer all in the Court are not Courtiers nor euery man that hath witte is not truly wise for then no man would spend breath to no purpose an Oxes foot may bee sweeter then a Cods head when Sockes may bee but saueguards for bare tooes in broken stockings Garlike hath béene in more grace then Tobacco and is yet in the Country with them that loue meate better then smoake Diogenes is dead and Alexander is in his graue and better bee a manish Dogge then a dogged man And if your good will be to your good words you are more like a stranger then a kinseman And for my pudding I belieue it will proue better then a Tobacco pipe so rather desirous to be a Milstone not to stirre at euery motion then a feather in a Weather-cocke to turne with euery gayle of winde I will pray for your better wit then you haue showne in a selfe wild humour and so till I finde you in more patience and lesse passion I will leaue you till wee méete againe hoping that you will bee as I am and will be a friend to forget all ill humours and ready to requite all kindnesses COVRTIER So will I and so Farewell Thus they parted for that time but what fell out at their next meeting as you like of this you shall heare more hereafter FINIS Necessary Notes for a Courtier Question WHat is a Courtier Answer An Attendant vpon Maiesty a companion of Nobility a friend to Vertue and a hope of honour Quest What things are chiefely to be required in a Courtier A. Two Q. What are they A. A good body and a good minde Q. How are they to be vsed A. In humillity and ciuillity Q. To whom A. The first vnto God the second to man Q. What are the proofes of a good mind A. Loue of goodnesse and feare of greatnesse Q. What are the tokens of a good body A. Ability and agility Q. What preserues a good minde in goodnesse A. Prayer and Charity Q. And what keeps the body in strength A. Continence and exercise Q. What is the chiefe grace of a Courtier A. The feare of God and the fauour of a King Q. What is the Honour of a Courtier A. The loue of vertue Q. What is the wealth of a Courtier A. The loue a King