Selected quad for the lemma: love_n

Word A	Word B	Word C	Word D	Occurrence	Frequency Band	MI	MI Band	Prominent
love_n	let_v	love_v	soul_n	10,315	5	5.5040	4	true

Text snippets containing the quad

ID	Title	Author	Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication)	STC	Words	Pages
A48615	A letter of advice to a young gentleman leaveing the university concerning his behaviour and conversation in the world / by R.L.	Lingard, R. (Richard), 1598?-1670.	1670 (1670)	Wing L2349; ESTC R12385	10,339	70

to inquisitive or Learned men let your answers be direct and concise It is both your Wisdome and your kindness to come to the point at first onely in conferences or debates speake not all you have to say at once in an Entire Harangue but suffer your self to be broached by degrees and keep an Argument for Reserve What you say at first may perhaps give satisfaction however you gaine Respite for Recollection and when all is out at last you will be thought to have more in store And because the mouth is the fountaine of Our Weale or our Woe and it is the greatest instance of prudence to rule that little member the Tongue and he indeed is a perfect man that offends not in word for all our follies and passions are lett out that way there are many things to be observed in the manageing of discourse I onely say in Generall that you must not speak with heat and violence nor with Reflection upon mens persons nor with Vanity and self-praise No man therefore should be his own Historian that is talke of his own feats his travells his conferences with great men c nor boast of his descent and alliance nor recount his Treasure or the manage of his Estate all which weares out the greatest patience and without a provocation expresses an intollerable Vanity and implyes a beleiving that others are affected and concerned in these things as much as himself The like weakness is talking of ones Trade or profession to those that neither mind it nor understand it Indeed if the company be all of one peice then debateing any thing that Relates to all may be usefull but it is impertinent in mix'd company to betray onely your skill or inclination In like manner he is not to be brook't that over a Glass of Wine will turn Statesman or Divine perplex good fellowes with Intrigues of Government cases of Conscience or School controversies which are too serious and too sacred to be the Subjects of common talke Let no mans Vice be your Theam nor your Friends because you love him not your Enemies because he is so and in you it will be expounded partiality and revenge not of any other because you are certainly unconcerned in him and may possibly be mistaken of him Let not the Lapses or ridiculous accidents or behaviours of men that are in drink or in love be taken notice of after or upbraided to them in jeast or earnest for no man loves to have his folly remembred nor to have the consequences of Wine or passion imputed to him and he cannot but like you worse if he finds they have left an Impression upon you Every mans fault should be every mans secret as he sinns doubly that publishes his own shame for he adds scandall to the sin so does every man increase the scandall that is the propagator of it When you carve out discourse for others let your choice be rather of things then of persons of Historicall matters rather then the present age of things distant and remote rather then at home and of your Neighbours and do not after all these Restrictions fear want of discourse for there is nothing in the world but you may speake of it Vsefully or pleasantly every thing sayes Herbert is big with jeast and has wit in it if you can find it out As for Behaviour that is certainly best which best expresses the sincerity of your Heart I think this rule failes not that that kind of Conversation that lets men into your Soule to see the goodness of your Nature and the Integrity of your mind is most acceptable for be assured every man loves another for his honesty to this every knave pretends and with the show of this he deceives Nay the sensuall love of bad men is founded upon this Nothing loves a Body but for a Soule nor a Soule but for such a disposition as answers to that Idea of goodness which is in the mind This is that that reconciles you to some meens at the first congress for usually you read mens Souls in their faces if they be young and uncorrupted and you for ever decline some countenances which seem to declare that some Vice or Passion has the mastery and though some times you are deceived yet you persit in your prepossession till the behaviour doth signally confute what the countenance did threaten This makes a starcht formall behaviour odious because it is forced and unnaturall and assum'd as a disguise and suffers not the Soule to shine clearly and freely through the outward actions First then your actions must discover you to be your own Master for he is a miserable slave that is under the tyranny of his passions And that fountain teeming pair Lust and Rage must especially be subdued That of love to give it the milder name so farr as it is vicious I take to be seated principally in the Fancy and there you must apply your Cure for I ascribe its vehemence not so much to the constitution as the pampering of the body and mens letting loose their Eyes and Tongues and Imaginations upon amorous Incentives and not keeping a sence and awe of Religion upon them For if you live in an age and place where shame and eivill penalties have no force you must have recourse to Religious means and the Grace of God for restraint Lust is more distinctly forbidden by our Christianity then any other thing Therefore it ought more Sacredly to be avoyded If you grow troublesome to your self In Gods name make use of that Honourable Remedy he has provided and in the Interim if you can allay your fancy and keep your Inclinations undetermined I think a promiscuous conversation is the safest for many that have lived in the shade and retirement when they came abroad were ruined by doting on the first thing they met with and this is oft the effect of distance and caution The other Spring of mischief is anger which usually flames out from an untamed pride and want of manners and many other untollerable infirmities so that there is no liveing in the world without quenching it for it will render you both troublesome and ridiculous and you shall be avoyded by all like a Beast of prey The Stoicks pretend to be successefull Eradicators of this passion and their Bookes may be usefully read for tameing it But themselves have retained many ill humours behind which are worse then a transient Rage and are most abhorrent from all Society as Moroseness Fastidious contempt of others Peevishness Caption Scurrility wilfullness c which issue from some tempers and some principles which men are apt to suck in to feed their naturall dispositions with whereas the world is not to be entertain'd with frowns and darke lookes Be as severe ad intra as you will but be wholly complaisant ad extra and let not your strictness to your self make you censorious and uneasy to others thus many mortified men have been very unruly to the