IMITATION AND CAUTION FOR CHRISTIAN WOMEN OR The life and death of that Excellent Gentlewoman Mrs. MARY BEWLEY Who departed this life her only son having finished his course the 9th of December before on the first of Febr. 1658 9. Recommended to the Reader by the Reverend and Eminently learned Doctor REYNOLDS But a woman that feareth the Lord she shall be praised Prov. 31. 30. But he Jacob refused to be comforted and he said For I will go down into the grave unto my son mourning Gen. 37. 35. O my sonne Absalom my sonne my sonne Absalom would God I had died for thee O Absalom my sonne my sonne 2 Sam. 18. 33. LONDON Printed by E. M. for George Calvert at the Half Moon in Pauls Church-yard neer the little North-door 1659. THE EPISTLE TO THE Reader THough I had not the happinesse to be acquainted with that excellent woman whose character is here published for an example unto others yet having been desired to peruse this breviate of her life and death I could not but judge it fit for publick view in regard of the great benefit which many may reap by reading of it for examples have a special efficacy to provoke and extimulate others to be followers of those who through faith and patience do inherit the Promises The Apostle amongst that cloud of witnesses by whose faith he doth perswade others to run with patience unto the race which is set before them hath recorded the examples of Sarah Rahab Moses his mother and other women as an encouragement unto unweariednesse in that race And maketh honourable mention of Phebe Priscilla Mary Persis and other holy women whose graces are not only crowned in heaven but are left as a sweet perfume in the Church on earth to quicken the imitation of all good women in all after-ages Nor was this way of celebrating the memory of gracious women out of use afterwards Gregory Nazianzen hath a Panegyrical Oration on his Sister Gorgonia Basil upon the Martyr Julitta Nyssen upon Pulcheria and Placilla Chrysostom upon Bernice Prosdole Pelagia Hierom is copious in the praises of Lea Marcella Asella Blesilla Paula Fabiola c. Nor do women of eminent graces now lesse deserve honour nor others of inferiour note lesse need helps for their encouragement than they did in former Ages I commend both the work and the Readers to Gods blessing Edward Reynolds IMITATION and CAVTION FOR CHRISTIAN WOMEN Or the life and death of that Eminent Gentlewoman Mrs. MARY BEWLEY WHo a can finde a vertuous woman said the wise Solomon who to his own proper share had no fewer than b a thousand of them to make c tryal of being so d taught by his mother who by her communion with the sex might have larger acquaintance with and by reflecting on her self deeper experience of the weaknesse and vanity of the generality of the female world but when e that good thing that favâ—ur that f Crown is found and obtained of the Lord then is her price above rubies and she to be g blessed and praised by her relations and the chief of the people meeting in the gates while alive lamented over when h dead and kept in memory after i death And it is by reason of the scarcity of such vertuous women that in Scripture such special notice is taken of an k obedient Sarah a prudent discreet l Abigal a m wise woman of Abel a n publick-spirited Hester a o devout Hannah and Elizabeth p the humble yet most high woman the Mother of our Lord q and that excellent Gospel-news publisher Anna r the tender-hearted Lydia s that liberal Shunamite and those other charitable t women in the New Testament Phebe Rom. 16. 12. Mary ver. 6. and Dorcas Acts 9. 36. of the u modestly adorned holy women of old of that private instructrix w Priscilla the Tent-maker together with Tryphena and Tryphosa Rom. 16. 12. Lois and Eunice 2 Tim. 1. 5. with 3. 15. of that repentant sinner Luke 7. 37. that importunately bold believing Syrophoenician Mark 7. 24 25 c. and of the x loving and beloved Martha and Mary And for the same reason did the Ancients and others record and celebrate women of special note in all Ages as may be seen in the writings of y those who have thought it worth the while to draw them together under one view yea and in this Nation z Reverend Divines have judged it expedient and useful to propose some women as patterns to others not as if they were the only eminent for many dye and their excellency goes away without any regarding it but that in such a scarcity all may not be lost for though holy women in educating their children and governing their family may yield a sweet favour to those about them yet the lives as Mr. * Manton hath well observed of Gods precious Saints how private soever their station be are very well worthy of record and publick notice exhibiting not only a pattern and lively Transcript of Religion and truly now and then 't is good to look upon Christs living Epistles but also of much provocation and encouragement to holinesse Therefore it is also judged convenient to represent briefly plainly and truly the latter part of the life and the deservedly lamented death of this though not generally known yet eminent Gentlewoman Mrs. MARY BEWLEY and that not so much out of private affection to her an object of purest and choicest love or to preserve her memory together with her sons among us for to whom of their relations will they not a always smell fragrantly but chiefly to illustrate the glory of God and to edifie the living especially her kindred friends and acquaintance yea so many of her sex as shall find leisure to read his short Narrative in which they may finde some things worthy of imitation observation and caution and that both in her life prosperous and afflicted and in her sicknesse and death Her life not to insist on her modest and holy deportment while a b Virgin it sufficeth for a proof hereof that she was much esteemed by Doctor Stoughton and by him c recommended to her now desolate husband as a godly and meet consort for him And that in her latter years it was a ground of fear to her that she could not remember the time and manner of her conversion though she had the testimony of her conscience that through the whole course of her pilgrimage she had loved and feared God and had walked in all holy duties before him a scruple sufficient to trouble a tender soul but abundantly answered d from the holy Scriptures in the Writings and Sermons of our English Divines Take therefore a prospect and view of her as a woman in all her relations in her holinesse and in her behaviour under her late affliction she was then A
concerning her sons death for those medicines which prudently were omitted to him were administred to her self and did only help her to dye the more sensibly and with the more pain she exhorted others to learn by her example to beware of setting their hearts on any creature and that they would strive to glorifie God while they live that they would redeem their time and make their acquaintance and peace with God before they lye down on their death-bed During her sicknesse she had great bodily pain so that she seldome slept and no small trouble of mind concerning her future estate being assaulted in her weaknesse by that slie roaring and cowardly Divel whom she overcame by the Lamb of God in which expression she delighted that taketh away the sins of the world and though she complained for want of assurance and the comfort that doth attend it yet she did receive look to embrace and anchor her hope on Christ and durst appeal from Satan unto God that she had lov'd him with all her heart and had endeavoured through much weaknesse said she to walk before him in righteousness and holiness and that she had prized his favour before life and would not adventure on the least sinne for all imaginable contentment she satisfied her self in the satisfaction of Christ and in that he was a merciful and faithful high Priest that came to destroy the works of the Divel And if in the height of her bodily distemper the vapours fuming up to her head she spake any thing amisse of her self which is no * new thing and its better to go out of the world troubled than lulled by Satan in a holy sollicitude than in a carnal security she afterward remembred and bemoaned it and acknowledged that God was a holy and just Soveraign in letting her finde he had sharper rods for his people than the death of a sonne and that it is folly to stand it out against God All Sabbath night she put away sleep and prepared to launch into that boundlesse Ocean eternity and therefore proposed all her objections fears and doubts that she might have resolution laid open the temptations of the Divel that she might know how to repel them and freely confessed all her sinnes in some of which most live without taking much notice of them which her tender conscience aggravated to the full and when she could not remember any moe she begg'd a friend to help her in this her search and when he could not then she turned her speech to God saying O thou God search me and try me and let me not dye in one unrepented for sin let me not deceive my self O gracious God what shall I do I will anchor my faith on Jesus who hath been favourable to others and why not to me She prayed earnestly for pardon of sinne and that she might have her soul for a prey And of this she expressed her hope hoping that she had all her hell in this life meaning that nights agony and that notwithstanding all her fears she should go to heaven comforting her self in the remembrance of a most holy upright old Disciple who had gone to heaven without assurance what a joy doth she now finde in being delivered from all her fears and how greatly doth it set off heaven to travel to it through the Suburbs of hell and now all her doubts and temptations being answered and she silenc't she did rest all Monday satisfied in great calmnesse of minde giving directions concerning her body after death and other affairs and was not heard after that nights conflict to speak doubtfully or fearfully of her eternal salvation About seven of the clock at night finding her convulsion fit to seize on her she desired one to pray with her and after being asked if she heard and had joyned in spirit answered yea And I thank God I have delighted in prayer One desiring her to speak something of Jesus Christ she knowingly and affectionately spake of his natures and offices and afterward taking a draught of cordial jullep she paused and shut her eyes as she was wont to do to beg a blessing on it and being asked her thoughts answered feelingly giving thanks unto the Father who hath made us meet to be partakers of the inheritance of the Saints in light And so the convulsion fit encreasing and the pangs of death catching hold of her and she talking a little of her dear sonne and husband betwixt one and two of the clock became speechlesse and then one asking her whether her thoughts were not now on God and Christ she lifted up her eyes and hands and offered to speak but could not and so slept quietly in the Lord the first of February 1658 9. and the thirty sixth year of her age the seventh week after her sons death and was with honour laid in the same grave with him Mr. Ley preaching her Funeral Sermon And thus this true relation is left to the application of every tender-hearted mother and wise woman May it prove serviceable to those ends for which this precious Gentlewoman only desired life even to publish the Sovereignty Wisdome Equity Power and Love of her God Who though when she died desired that nothing might be spoken at her Funeral such was her self-denial and though now she be incessantly night and day praising adoring and admiring God without imperfection yet if she have any leisure to look off Jesus Christ and have any knowledge of what is done here below it will satisfie her greatly that God is glorified by her memory on earth in stirring up women to imitate what was praise-worthy in her and in warning them to moderate their love fear and sorrow and to pitch their affections on never fading objects He that testifyeth these things knoweth that he saith true and would not willingly through grace make a lye to uphold the reputation or preserve the lives of the best and most deserving women in the world On her Tomb-stone Inclosed here in love do lie together BENONI MARAH th' only son and mother Who in their lives lovely and pleasant were In death and grave they undivided are ERRATA Page 2. marg. for institutionae and institutione for Bezerliuck r. Beyerlinck Mr. Clarkes Sermon at the Funeral of the only son of this Gentlewoman wherein is a short Narrative of his life is sold by George Calvert at the Half-moon in Pauls Church-yard near the little North-door FINIS a Prov. 31. 10. b 1 King 11. 3. c Eccl. 7. 27 28 d Prov. 31. 1. e Prov. 18. 22. f Prov. 12. 4. g Prov. 31. 28 29 30 31. h Act. 9. 36 39. Gen. 23 2. i Gen. 35. 20 48 7. Mat. 26. 12 13. Luke 1. 48. k 1 Pet. 3. 6. l 1 Sam. 25. m 2 Sam. 20. â—2 n Esther 4. 10. o 1 Sam 1 ch. 2. Luke 1. p Luk. 1 ch. 2. q Luke 2. 38. r Acts 16. 14. s 2 Kings 4. 10 t Luke 8. 2 3. 21. 2.
What a burden and expence of time is this dressing and undressing how hard is it to distinguish women professing godlinesse from the profane by their outward garb The fault is acknowledged but how few reforme it In her delight in the Word preached for she had an high esteem of and special love to Scriptural preaching and to those Sermons which by clear full and pertinent Scripture-light not only moved her affections wherewith most women are satisfied but solidly setled her judgment increased her knowledge and raised her soul She heard with a z Berean spirit and Lydias heart did faithfully retain and promptly repeat what she thus heard and conscionably practise what she thus embraced Sometime she refrained from writing in the Church that she might exercise her memory and be the more affected with what she heard which after she came home she committed to writing In her great reverence and due respect to that great Ordinance of the Lords Supper through godly jealousie a fearing to approach it and solemnly preparing for it and was hardly perswaded to go to it the Sabbath day before she sickned for fear lest her sorrow had indisposed and made her actually for the present unfit to partake of it and yet said she Why should I not go and remember the death of the Sonne of God seeing I so sadly remember the death of my own sonne and this it may be shall be the last I go to And such was her esteem of this Ordinance and such her tendernesse of spirit that it troubled her in her sicknesse that she had been prevailed with to receive though at length by the discourse of a Reverend Divine she was satisfied and this may be a warning to all rash intruder 's on and undue preparers for that Ordinance In her care to sanctifie the Lords day which she b remembred the night before it came and accordingly prepared for it and when it came she sanctified it throughout for besides publick and family duties she used to retire oftner that day than on any other day sometimes neglecting to eat that she might gain the more time to be private either repeating what she heard that day or questioning with her son about what he had read and heard choosing rather to keep silence at table than speak what was not c sutable to the day and did not curtilate the day by lying too long in the morning or going too soon to bed at night d or being wearied with it In the joy she took in spiritual conference and the e communion of Saints delighting to hear of the experiences of others and f freely communicating her own to those in whom she confided often g asking direction how to read the Scripture with most advantage and how to walk comfortably with God often speaking of the love of God and Christ with tears in her eyes and joy in her countenance bewailing her not walking up to her knowledge and the wandring of her thoughts in duty talking with an holy disdain of the vanities of this life and of the excellency of that to come evidencing in her Christian conferences knowledge of divine things in a Scritural straine with holy affections In her valuing much Christians h watching one over another and therefore she could receive i an admonition even for that in which she was most faulty her distrustful fears and over-much passion with meeknesse thankfulnesse and reformation evident to beholders and professed often that free and faithful admonition was a most real k token and endearment of love And she also manifested her love to others in this kinde yet with much wisdome as suting her words and timing the admonition so that the offender without shame hath known his fault and admired her masculine prudence and yet even in this she hath bewailed her sinful bashfulnesse that when in the company of other Gentlewomen she hath not had the confidence to interrupt their poor low discourse and bring in more profitable and edifying And indeed women professing godlinesse should spend their time better when they meet rather discoursing of Jesus Christ and the Robe of his righteousnesse than censuring praising or dispraising such a person or such a garb and should study how to remedy their own folly than foâ—lishly talk of the folly of others And as thus she manifested her piety and walking with God in these publick Ordinances and private duties so also in secret where there is lesse temptation to hypocrisie she kept up communion with God In her Closet duties She was observed to be l frequent not satisfying her self with Morning and Evening every day in her Closet and hath professed that she found greatest satisfaction when most there and therefore was thought to neglect that sometime which busie m house-wives keep a stir about her weeping red eyes have manifested her ardent holy prayers n she was careful to know to whom to direct her prayers that she might not worship an unknown God and after prayer she look't up for an answer and with joy hath taken special notice of the return of her prayers looking on that duty not as a task but as her priviledge and the way of keeping up intercourse with heaven and so much and earnest was she in this duty that she hath not hudled up or abbreviated her requests to God upon the pretence of other businesses Hence it was no small trouble to her in her sicknesse for the Divel can molest us with small matters that in her health one day begging hard something from God one knocking at her Closet door she to avoid ostentation and supposing earnest businesse broke off her discourse with the God of heaven to speak with a fellow-creature for so she charg'd her self How may this shame the short superficial prayers of many who are glad of distractions to satisfie their consciences in dispensing with Closet-duties And as she thus poured out her soul before God so she greatly delighted to read search understand and meditate on the holy Scriptures in which for a woman she was mighty for she daily read them could not endure to read and not understand and therefore often o propounded the difficult passages she understood not and craved others judgments to assist her not neglecting her own p pondering and meditation which she begun the last half year of her life to commit to writing and which after much importunity she hath read to her husband and friend to their great satisfaction for therein she discovered her gifts and graces knowledge and affection excellent matter handsomely composed and all in Scripture-language which being in short-hand writing can hardly be read some of the Characters being of her own invention but some of the Scriptures which were the subject of her meditation are these Psal. 73. 25 26. Psal. 42. 11. Ephes. 5. 14. Heb. 9. 27. Gal. 2. 20. Psal. 77. 3. James 4. 6. She hath also left in
writing a collection out of the Psalmes 1. Of the troubles inward and outward of the righteous 2. Their good or bad deportment under them 3. Their present support by faith and experience 4. And the issue and their happy deliverance out of them She begun also to draw forth all the commendable vertues and noted vices of the women recorded in Scripture that she might have the one for a pattern the other for a beacon Also she intended and did begin to read over the whole Bible that thence she might finde some mitigation of her sorrow by collecting all the presidents and promises which were sutable to her condition and sundry other Manuscripts she hath left which could they be read might be proposed as a spurre to Gentlewomen how to improve their much spare time In her inward graces For the Kings daughter is chiefly glorious within She had not only leafes and blossomes but had the seed of God abiding in her and was filled with the fruits of the Spirit She had a godly fear and solicitude concerning the state of her soul working out her salvation with fear and trembling and giving all diligence to make her calling and election sure She was blessed with a large measure of spiritual knowledge of God and Christ and the Covenant of grace and had good insight in the wayes of her own heart and the vanity of the world She had melting affections sorrowing for sinne and that she was not more heavenly and fruitful fearing to sinne against God serving him with reverence and godly fear had an intense and prevailing love to the Lord Jesus Christ her heart leaping within her to think on his love and undertaking and to speak of his praises and of this love of God in Christ which is wonderful she hath left a meditation as by some words may be conjectured but cannot all be read And hence her love flowed out to the Saints those excellent in the earth in whom was her delight without respect of persons doing very mean offices to some of them And of this love of the Saints she hath left in Italian hand this meditation following This Christian and well-grounded love as it is a fruit of the Spirtt for love is of God and as it proceeds from him so is it injoyned by him this is my Commandment that ye love one another nay he stiles it a new Commandment It is not so much a Legal as Evangelical Commandment backed with a most transcendent pattern I have given you an example and hereby perceive we the love of God that he laid down his life for us yea it bears the similitude of God for God is love and though its residence be in heaven yet it hath an habitation in and with the sonnes of men for he that dwells in love dwells in God and God in him and when Christians walk in this praise-worthy Palace then do they behold most of God This love then is sincere fervent pure serviceable constant and under the mantle thereof lie teaching free admonition meekness kindnesse faith and with this garment a multitude of sinnes are covered She had zeal for God witnesse her not sparing her dear sonne but reproving him for the least arising of the least evil in him and hath been heard to say that she would not care for the enjoyment of him if she had not seen something of God and a tender conscience in him She was humble though naturally of a high spirit often concealed her parts and preferred others in love neither provoking nor envying others nor thinking her self to be something when she was nothing and of this grace of humility take this her own meditation written at large Humility is a rare and singular grace doth admirably adorn a Christian for if wisdome make the face to shine then with the lowly there is wisdome it is like the gold and enamel about the precious Diamond sets it off with a magnificent lustre it hath the promise of addition an humble soul is an habitation for a holy God and the Creator delights to dwell with the humble creature and the Redeemer will save the humble person for he humbled himself that sinners may be exalted and if they humble themselves he hath promised to exalt them for honour shall uphold the humble in spirit as pride is an harbinger to destruction so humility is a conduct to honour great are the in-comes of an humble soul riches honour and life and excellent their priviledges for the Lord hears the desire of the humble and forgets not their cry they shall be taught the way of God and guided by him in judgment for the Lord hath respect to the lowly and he lifteth up the meek and they shall inherit the earth good tydings shall be preached to them and they shall increase their joy among men for the Lord will beautifie them with salvation therefore who would not be cloathed with that shining garment of humility According to the ability of a wife she was not wanting in Almes-deeds * prompting and encouraging her husband to lay out some of his Estate on pious uses especially since the death of her sonne and perswading him not so much to look after an heir to keep up his name as to do something that might cause the blessing of the poor to come upon him She often professed that if she had more children she would never be so saving and sparing to lay up for them but would liberally do good for God said she hath taught us the vanity of disquieting our selves in laying up riches now not knowing whether he shall be a wise man or a fool that shall enjoy them Let good women remember that all this is for their imitation Now to proceed to the last thing in her life Her behaviour under her late tryal and affliction Her sharp tryal and stinging affliction indeed was the death of her only sonne eighteen years old who on the ninth of December last after eight dayes sicknesse dyed of the small pox suddenly unlook't for by her being put in hopes by those who had more skill in that disease than her self that there was no apparent danger and she a spectator of the assaults of death What Parent is not filled with sorrow for the losse of one son even a Prince that prevailed with God yet cannot overcome his sorrow for the absence of one Joseph though more than ten sons rose up to comfort him did not Christs bowels yearn toward that weeping mother who had lost her only childe Luke 7. 12. And doth not the Scripture hold it forth to be the greatest of sorrows Jer. 6. 26. Amos 8. 10. Zech. 12. 10. if Naomi change her name into Marah Ruth 1. 20. for such a losse if that noble and good Shunamites soul be vexed in her 2 Kings 4. 20 27. for her lads death and if Rachel weep for her children and won't