joyfull and secret misteries whereof they are ignorant that be carelesse thereof and will not enter into his secret chamber with him although they be in his house and attend vpon him DE. Wherefore doe you prayse him with all these high titles LOVE c. Because the more I extoll commend and prayse him the more I displease despise and set at nought my selfe which how acceptable it is to him cannot be declared with tongue And this is his will pleasure that we continually haue set before our eyes his goodnes his excellency and his infinite greatnes and our owne malice our basenes and exceeding misery And farther I am certayne that I cannot be deceaued although I prayse and honour him all that is in my power for he is farre more noble more excellent more potent and greater then either I or all creatures togither both Angelicall and humaine can comprehend with thought CHAPTER 7. Of the office of the Loue of God in an other degree and a contmuation of that which he beganne to declare of the manner of praying LOVE c. After that I haue endeuoured to prayse and exalt him with the vttermost of my power I offer vp to him my whole minde and will with a chiefe Purpose that I haue that for no worldly thing I would offend or displease him and also most earnestly I entreate him that it may please him to keepe and preserue me in this will and minde considering that without him I am no way able to doe it Then aske I forgiuenes of him for all the offences and iniuries I haue done vnto him and beseech him that he will permit me to thinke vpon vnderstand or loue nothing but himself And yet farther I desire of him that considering he hath voutsafed to admit me for his seruant and friend that into a place of so high a function that it will please him to bestowe on mee the holy spirit of Humility which may withdrawe and turne away my minde from all things displeasing and hatefull to him that my seruice be not hatefull but acceptable to him Also I craue of him that he will bestow on me such things as he knoweth I stand in neede of whither they bee such thinges as are necessary for me or such as for his honour and pleasure he will haue me endued with and that for no other cause but that he would suffer me to liue and die in him and not cast me from his sight according to my desert After this I pray for all those that I loue most and to whome either spiritually or corporally I hold my selfe bound for all this society and for all liuing creatures that it will please him to bestowe his grace and mercy on them that according to their dueties they may knowe him loue him honour prayse and worshippe him All this doe I labour to present to him with sincerity and purity of hart DE. How doest thou present thy selfe before him with this purity of heart LoVE c. As neare as I can I keepe a watch ouer my hart and minde and take a care to my soule restrayning as much as I may all my senses and continually setting before my selfe playne simplicity which doth interpret to the best whatsoeuer I behold And if I would bee free and secure from all feare then doe I remayne and abide with my Lord and Master with whome to be present and to talke and conferre and whose counsaill and aduice to demand is my chiefe good and joy my only will and comfort Neither can I enjoy peace quiet or security or finde anie manner of contentement or ease but only when I am present in his company And for this cause haue I determined with my selfe to forsake all worldly pleasures and to dwell with him and cleaue to him neuer to depart from him except hee shall command mee DE. Yet I thinke it very necessary sometimes to be busied in reading good bookes LOVE c. True it is it is good to spend some time in reading but not with a minde to become learned and skilfull but that thereby thou maist finde out GOD and his wayes and once hauing found him maist knowe and loue him For this I shall not neede many bookes This one thing I looke after will and desire that I may settle and fix my whole loue on GOD and may joyne all my affection reason and vnderstanding to him For his loue alone is sufficient for me he will teach me all thinges that shall be conuenient for me to knowe and can open and discouer more secrets and misteries to mee how I shall loue and not offend him then all the books that the whole world doth possessed And I obtayne greater purity of soule feare deuotion reuerence compunction fortitude and strength and seuerity against the flesh by being in his presence then by reading continually Besides I know for certayne hee neuer will aske account how much I haue reade but how much I haue loued amd esteemed him Neither would I altogither exclude or banish reading especially for such as are yet simple and ignorant and knowe not howe to iudge of their thoughts wordes and workes For to such it is requisite to spend much time in reading to learne the exercises of the spirit minde For as it would be thought great follie rashnes and disgrace to a Prince if a rude country fellow not accustomed to speake to a King should presume in the presence of all his nobility to come and bouldly speake his minde and if in speaking he should vse his accustomed rusticall and vndecent termes it could not but be thought so great a disgrace to the Prince that he iustly might commād him to be thrust out from his presence and farre better had it beene he had neuer presumed thither euen so standeth the case in spirituall cases But to those that by reading and hearing haue alredy attayned to the knowledg of God and diuine exercises to such the exercise of praying is more necessary then reading as being alredy expert how to behaue themselues in the spirituall Court Farther when I present my selfe before my Lord and Master I am very carefull that inconstantly I turne not my head or eyes hither or thither For it would be taken a great dishonour to him to looke an other way whilest on should talke with him DE. Tell me your meaning more plainely for as yet I vnderstand not LOVE When I speake to my Master if at such time I busie my thoughts and reason vpon anie thing but only vpon him I speake to then turne I my backe not my face to him For this cause when I perswade my selfe that I am present before him in sight and that he doth behold me and neuer turneth his eyes from me but marketh what I say I vse all reuerence deuotion loue and attention to him that I can Then doe I prayse and thanke him for all his benefits bestowed on mee and all other his creatures calling them
conuerseth with all that seeke after him This descourse of the sheepheard pleased Desire not a little and the rather being put in hope by him to finde out the Loue of God Who said to him teach me I pray you the ready way that I must take least that perhaps through ignorance I happe to goe awry SH I may not my selfe forsake my flocke yet will I appoint thee a conuenient companion in this thy journey who accompaning thee that by the assistance of God thou shalt not easely goe out of thy way take here with thee this my dogge DE. What is his name SH Good will DE. Farewell my Brother SH And you also to whome I wish a prosperous journey CHAPTER 4. Of the house of Humilitie HEre Desire leauing the Sheepheard vndertoke his journey accōpanied with his dogge running by his side which was no little comfort to him on the way and now hauing trauailed many dayes and nights he entred on a Sonday into a most pleasant greene medow seated in a dry and rocky soyle whereat Desire meruailed not a little to see so pleasant and so greene a meddow lying in so stony and so barraine a place ouergrowne aboute with bushes and thornes And entring farther in he found there builte a stately faire Monasterie the sight whereof pleased him much But comming neare he found the gates shut and a certayne Virgin standing without modest as to him seemed both in her attire and behauiour who at the sight of Desires dogge beganne to be afrayd Whome Desire comforted and hidde not to feare assuring her his dogge would not hurte her And meruailing to see her stand thus alone without he demanded of her why shee stoode there who answeared him that shee expected the opening of the gates to goe in Then demanding farther her name of her she answered saying I am cal-called Vaine-glorie Now Desire hauing long expected the opening of the gates and perceuing his attendance to be all in vaine beganne to call and knocke at the gate with a hammer hanging thereat called Longanimitie presently came forth can auncient reuerende man who opened the gate This man was called the Feare of God who was both porter and keeper of all this Monasterie whome Desire seing and finding a graue and wise reuerende man was greatly cheared in beholding him and after due reuerence done to him spake to him in manner following Good Sir quoth he my comming hither is to seeke out a Knight called the Loue of God Who as I am tolde is trauailed through this desert and hath his abode now in this Monastery wherefore I humbly desire of you to know if he be here within or no. At this demand of his the porter rejoyced for he loued the Loue of God euen as his owne Brother asked of him why h sought ofter this Knight DE. I seeke him not only because I am greatly delighted with him but also because it is very behouefull for me to finde him FEARE OF GOD. What haue you any thing so secret that you dare not reveale it DE. Truely Sir only I desire his company and conuersation and wish I were his seruant to attend on him coueting nothing more than such a Master and instructer for in all this country I cannot finde a Master answerable to my minde although many haue bin willing to entertayne me But I haue learned from many that the Loue of god is a most noble gentle and bountifull Master who in that he is rich often bestoweth great preferments on his seruāts FEARE OF GOD. True it is he passed his way accōpanied but with fewe who at this present is not within but haue patience a while I will call a Virgin to you who is able to direct you where you shall finde him out CHAPTER 5. How Vaine-glory watcheth at the gate MEane time now Desire joyfully expected the comming of the Porter and Virgin he spake of not weighting long there came to him a modest and seemely Virgin who saluting him curteously was in like manner resaluted againe of whome Desire craued her name who answered my name is called Nihili-pensio because I entermedle not in superfluous vnnecessary thinges and demanding farther the name of the Monasterie shee told him it was the house of Humilitie because within there dwelt many virgins who liued vnder the obedience and rule of humilitie he againe asked what maide is that which standeth without the gate her name quoth she is called Vaine-glory who sitteth continually at this gate vntill it be opened and then if the Porter be negligent looke not strictly to his office but leaue open the gates shee presently entreth Why do you not admit her in said Desire considering both in speech habit gesture she seemeth modest vertuous honest You know not quoth the Virgin her conditions I perceaue For I assure you shee is a most dangerous beaste for how much the more modest religious she semeth by her externall carriage so much I holde her to be more dangerous What saith Desire doth she at any time hurt you yea truly said the Virgin so farre as lieth in her power her father is a wicked man called Selfe Loue her mother as ill called Selfe Estimation neither haue we three greater enemies in all the world and farther they are enemies to the Loue of God a Knight who is Master of this Monastery in which we liue And that you may farther know what hurt Vaine-glory doeth vs I say so soone as shee entereth in shee is so gluttenous and rauening that first shee goeth into our Orchards there deuoureth and eateth vp al our fruite which is both faire good which is the fruite wee haue to liue with neyther haue we more than one tree of it which carrieth so litle that hardly are we susteyned therewith which being taken away from vs by Vaine-glory we remaine so poore that nothing is left vs. And yet worse than this after shee is once come in shee is so crafty and deceitfull that we cannot expell her labour we neuer so much vntill wee call the assistance of our Mother at whose only sight shee runneth away wherefore wee thinke it good not to admitte her at all which to preuent wee purposely keepe this Porter continually at our gate who is a seuere and sterne man and still shutteth the gate that shee cannot enter whome wee intreate to be circumspect that when hee admitteth any hee through negligence leaue not open the gate Desire stoode amased at the discourse of this Virgin and replied considering shee is so dangerous an enemy to you you cannot be too carefull to keepe her out of your house CHAPTER 6. By what meanes we may attame to Humilitie DEsire continuing his speech with this Virgin asked her who brought her into that goodly and Religious Monastery adorned and shining with so rare vertues Two Virgins quoth shee guided me hither whereof the one is called Contempt of the world a Virgin endued with singuler
my conscience Desire thought this Virgin of rare and singuler vertue and departing from her was brought into the Cell of an other daughter of Humility whose name was Desire of Contēpt who receauing him courteously was asked of Desire both her name and conditions VIR my name is Desire of Coutempt because I desire not to be honoured or esteemed of any man Desire wondered hearing this Virgin desire to be so much contemned considering how different it was from the mindes of most men But admired her vertues finding she did it for the Loue of God And leauing her was brought into the Cel of an other Virgin whose name was To reioyce in being contemned Of whome Desire being entertayned demaded likewise her name and conditions VIR My name is To reioyce to be contemned For I wish to be despised scorned and iniured for the Loue of God DE. Instruct me I beseech you how I may attayne to this vertue for such is the haughtines of my proude minde that I doe not only reioyce but am grieued and repine if I be contemned scorned despised or iniured VIR That proceedeth from want of Humility whose vertue is to contemne and neglect her selfe for the Loue of God And truely this is an apparant token that thou aboundest vvith pride and ouer much selfe loue But seing thou art by GOD conducted hither into this Monastery we will willingly instruct thee in all kinde of vertue and altering thy habit will make thee a newe man and will direct and instruct thee how to speake with the Loue of God for other wayes thou shalt be sure for to loose thy labour Therefore if thou wouldest attayne to my vertue thou must imprinte in thy hart my Sister Desire to bee contemned thinking and determining thus with thy selfe henceforth will I desire to be scorned and contemned and to be neglected of all men for the Loue of God This desire once throughly fixed in thy hart thou shalt by degrees attayne to my vertue through prayer study and diligent endeuour And although at the beginning thou shalt endure some labour and payne by striuing to subdue and master thy owne appetites Yet perseuer to the end and thou shalt gette the victorie In so much that thou shalt rejoyce when any thing is said or done to thee contrary to thy likeing Farther thou must by degrees enforce thy selfe to desire to be scorned despised and contemned For it is most true that no man can be humble that is not just And he that shall not desire to be despised contemned mocked and debased this man cannot be called just DE. How may that be that whosoeuer desireth and wisheth not to bee despised should bee said to bee a man vnjust For by that accompt wee shall finde but fewe just men and in my opinion this cannot be true VIRG. I will easely prooue what I haue said It cannot be denied but that hee is jus which giueth to each man that which is right if therefore man can chalenge nothing else for himselfe but to be contemned scorned mocked and debased hee is not just which desireth not to bee so vsed DE. I would heare you prooue that and shewe plainely how nothing but contempt is due to man VIRG. I will First there is no question but that all that which is good ought be loued honored desired and praysed and how much greater and better it is so much the more it ought to be loued contrarie wayes that what so is naught ought to be despised hated rejected and suppressed Now if it be true that euery men is ill it followeth that of right hee must bee contemned and despised DE. Tell mee how all men are to be said to be naught VIRG. Only GOD is good therefore all men are naught DE. I cannot yeald to that conclusion VIRG. Logitians shall proue that none is good but God and whatsoeuer is not God is not good but ill And if man be ill that all shame reproach and contempt is due to him CHAPTER 16. How all creatures are good and yet none is good but God himselfe DESIRE I am not yet resolued by thy alleadged reasons considering thou saist that God is good and that whatsoeuer is not God is not to be said good And the holy Scripture saith that God sawe all thinges that he had made that they were not only good but very good Farther considering God is good as indeede he is the chiefe goodnesse it selfe and the efficient cause and beginning of all thinges created all things that he hath made must of necessity be good that the worke be answerable to the workeman that made it Whereupon it followeth that whatsoeuer God hath made must of necessitie be very good Besides considering man is the most excellent of all corporal creatures it is plaine that he is not only good but very good And then if he be good by thy owne rule it followeth that both honour and loue are due to him VIRG. I will not maintaine a long disputation with thee for that disagreeth with the rules of Humility only I will open what I haue said more at large that thou maist better vnderstand my meaning The scripture sayeth that none is good but only God Which is thus to be vnderstood that only God is essentially good to be good is only proper to him And what soeuer he hath made may be said to be good participating in goodnes giuē to them by God For whatsoeuer goodnes they haue is Gods not their owne So when thou seest good giftes bestowed on any creature from aboue thou must honor and loue such a creature But this honor and loue must be referred to God and not to the creature Therefore our selues and all creatures are to be loued of vs because they be good in their essence or being as the creatures of God this is to loue God in his creatures Let not therefore any man desire to be praysed or honored for his owne sake but for the goodnesse which God hath bestowed on him attributing and referring it all to GOD. For it is one thing that man hath from God but an other which he hath of him selfe From God he hath what good soeuer is but from him selfe whatsoeuer is ill He hath from God that he representeth and carrieth his Image likenesse But of him selfe through wicked life and euell manners he is made altogither dislike to God Also it is giuen to him by the grace of God to desire to be good and endued with vertue but of himselfe hee desireth ill and doeth those thinges that most displease God From hence we learne that those thinges which are bestowed on man from aboue are greatly to be honoured and highly to be loued which are the cōditions of his creation his natural blessings yet not to be loued for his owne sake but for the honor of God cōtrary those things to be hated which are in man himselfe as his vices offences al other imperfections So
that diuersly we honor despise loue hate some thinges in one the selfe same man And be he endued with neuer so great vertue deuotion Yet let him be assured that of himselfe he hath nothing that is good and still let him desire that in regarde of the good giftes bestowed on him by god be they vertue deuotion or other spirituall benefits that God alone be honored and loued for them and that all prayse be giuen to him as to the fountayne of all goodnes But for the sinne in him which he knoweth to be his owne let him desire to be despised hated and contemned of all men This doing I say he is to be accompted iust But if euery iust man shall desire to be contemned after this sort how great is the iniustice of a man desiled with sinne not only not to desire to be contemned as I haue said but to desire and labour to be honoured and extolled Let not therefore a wreatched sinner thinke and imagine that he hath shewed much Humility in desiring to be contemned or let him not be the better perswaded of him selfe therefore considering the most holy vertuous and deuoutest man is bound of duty to desire as much CHAPTER 17. Of the same DEsire was not a little pleased herewith and said to this Virgin DE. I beseech you Sister instruct and direct me by what meanes I may attayne to this holy Desire VIR Two wayes there bee by which thou maist obtayne it which are the Loue of God and a holy Purpose to object imbase thy selfe like to a labouring beast to which holy Purpose our Gouernesse hath wedded her self And if thou wilt be ruled by my directions thou shalt finde thy selfe not a little assisteth thereby DE. Most willingly will I be instructed by you VIR Then assure thy self that the Loue of God whome I perceaue thou art so desirous to finde hath no more dangerous hurtful enemy thē is thy owne body Inure thou thy selfe therefore daily to this custome that euery morning thou say to thy soul Let me see now soule how thou wilt this day hate thy body which is so great an enemy to thy sweete Sauiour and Creator IESVS and how much thou wilt desire that it may be despised afflicted tormented and scorned At night likewayes say thus againe Now shewe me my soule how this day thou hast despised thy body so rebellious against thy most sweete Lord IESVS how thou hast desired that it might be afflicted and iniured of all men and hast laboured that nothing be pardoned it but hast carried thy self most seuere against it This doing deare Brother and still conuersing in these good thoughts and euer perseuering in this thy desire this only exercise in time will bring thee to an exceeding perfection of perfit Humility and will teach how to ouercome and put to flight the most dangerous enemy and be trayer of thy soule and in conclusion thou shalt thereby attayne to so greate hatred of thy selfe that thou shalt wish labour to be contemned and despised And when hereafter thou shalt happen to be contemned of some man then sticke fast to me forsake not my vertue But with rejoycing and thankes giuing to God say thus to thy selfe Now thankes be to God who hath reuenged me of my enemie Desire being much contented with the direction of this Virgin tooke leaue of her and was brought into the Cell of an other daughter of Humility whose name was Simplicity who receauing him louingly was asked by him her name vertue and conditions SIMP My name is Simplicitie My office and conditions is to behaue my selfe simply sincerely and plainely towardes all men and to conceane no hurte or ill meaning of any thing that I shall happen to heare or to see but to thinke all thinges to be done rightly and holylie and to thinke ill of no body but my selfe For I euer suspect and feare my selfe and continually watch ouer my thoughts and desires still looking into my selfe and holding open the right eye of perfect wisdome whereby I may echewe and auoide all euell and our Mother Humility be made more strong in her vertue DE. What is not Humilitie endued with all kinde of vertue except thou hold and keepe open thy eye SIMP No considering Simplicity without Wisdome is of no estimation but hurteth rather then helpeth For the Loue of God loueth no man but such as shall came with true knowledge and Wisdome CHAPTER 16. Of the manners and conditions of Simplicitie DESIRE Now then I desire to be instructed by you my Sister how and in what manner you behaue your selfe simply towardes all sortes of people SIMP In three thinges which are in thought worde and deede First I neuer vse to thinke vpon those things which are aboue my knowledge capacity neither desire I th honors estimations vanities of this world but stil perseuer in this humble thought that I am the most abject of al the world and vnworthiest that liueth to be the seruant of God thinking all other holy vertuous replenished with al kindes of grace vertue Secondly I resolue to vse no flattering feyned or deceiptful wordes but a playne affirmation or else a deniall that is only yea yea or no no. For whatsoeuer is more proceedeth not of good but from the roote groūd of vanity Thirdly I haue determined to busie my selfe in no worldly curious or vayne workes but in such only as are simple and yet necessary least thereby I be drawne to vanity of singularity thereby be expelled kept out from hēce For to doe an action simply bringeth Humility of hart but otherwayes to doe is most ful of perils DE. As how SIMP Thou shalt vnderstand Desire that our gouernes Lady Mother Humilitie hath set me here imposed this charge on me to keepe safely in this Monastery two rare Iewels which are remayning here which are the one Purity of hart the other Innocency The valew whereof is of so high esteeme that they cannot be prised according to their worthines For the obteyning whereof this monasery the other seated in this desert where at the beginning foūded built And what good soeuer we doe is referred to the getting keeping these Iewels But if Curiosity Vanity or Singularitie should enter by the gate of our hart our mouth or else our action they would steale carry away both these Iewels frō vs. And therfore if any of our Virgins shall not imploy all their thoughts words workes to get preserue these we accompte them fooles not vnderstading what they vndertake DE. Why do you so carefully preserue these Iewels considering that by your profession you haue vowed pouerty it is dangerous lest you should offend in couetousnes keeping such vnnecessary and pretious iewels cōsidering many poore people may sterue through want of them SIM Herein thou art deceaued For although in possessing louing or desiring ritches or goods a man may
the world and hath and keepeth his riches and treasures all in his owne handes And yet notwithstanding it is his will and pleasure that we should liue in continuall pouerty to the end we fixe not or settle our loue and affection on any other creature but on himselfe He could if it so pleased him bestow abundance on vs but to his best beloued he doth not because they should loue him only and hate this world and the vanities thereof And wee cannot aske a more manifest token of his loue towardes vs then that he suffereth vs to bee in necessity in this miserable life sendeth vs not those pleasures which fraile flesh would couet And yet farther he will haue vs spend our liues in pouerty least temporall and needles cares should ouercome our weake mindes but will that we should serue him with quiet cōtented thoughts and not be mooued either with losse or gaine of worldly commodities or too much rejoyce or lament in prosperity or aduersity with ouer great mirth or exceeding sorrow but haue our harts still vnited to him in peace and contentation without any mislike For such is the disposition of the Loue of God that he will not inhabit but in still and sequestred places DE. What is the especial vertue that is in you POV To conforme and frame my selfe according to my sisters amongst whome I liue And although I desire to possesse nothing yet to keepe out and expell an enemy of ours that seeketh daily to enter amongst vs and destroy our garden and eate vp our fruit whose name is Singularity our Lady Mother will haue mee liue like my other sisters And yet that I loose not the reward of my vertue shee hath married me to a holy Purpose whose mame is to aske nothing And farther she telleth me if I will attaine to perfection that I must rest content with that which is giuen me be it much or litle and accept as thankfully of grosse and homely diet as of that which shall be prouided at the costliest price and to leaue part of that which is alowed to me and to be content for the Loue of God to take so much only as necessity shal desire DE. That is as if one should desire to be better then good or labour to doe more then he were bound to doe For if I rightly vnderstand it that Lord which hath founded and erected this Monastery commaundeth you to haue the spirit of pouerty as the Prophet saith If thou abound in riches beware thou settle not thy loue on them Whereby I gather that the vertue of pouerty doth not consist in hauing or possessing much or little but in the loue or contempt we take in them POV. I doe not deny but that the spirit of pouerty consisteth in the minde yet notwithstanding it is much safer for the Loue of God to possesse nothing considering our loue and affection to rich and beautifull thinges is so fraile and prone that hardly can wee haue them without fixing our loue on them Least therefore such worldlie riches shoulde gayne some parte of our loue from the Loue of God which is already but smal towards him it is good as the saying is to remoue the strawe farther from the fier For the Loue of God doth chalenge of duety all the loue of man wholy to him selfe and manie there bee that herein flatter themselues saying I doe not immoderatelie loue this or that thing neither would I to much sorrow if it where taken from me But beleeue mee affection and loue is so subtle a thing that hardly are men founde not louing what they possesse Neither can we haue a better example hereof then our SAVIOVR CHRIST himselfe who when he could haue possessed the whole ritches of the world without feare to loue or affect them extraordinarily yet remember how needely and poorely not himselfe liued but also his Blessed Mother and his Holy APOSTLES Which howe can we anie other wayes conceaue but that we must neither affect or possesse any worldly ritches For which cause I haue clearely forsaken all such vnnecessary thinges as I vsed to haue with me in my Cell reteyning nothing els but the Image of my sweete SAVIOVR hanging naked on the ✚ Crosse thereby to remember his great loue to mee I once vsed to keepe many books with mee but nowe possesse only a Bible the life of SAINCTES and the life of my SAVIOVR IESVS with some fewe other for my deuotions And rest fully contented to meditate on sweete Iesus and to busie my selfe with the booke of his holy life CHAPTER 21. Of Obedience DEsire receauing no lesse contentment from this Virgin tooke leaue of her and weas brought to the Cel of an other daughter of Humility called Obedience To her Desire yealded very great reuerence in that she seemed to him to be of high dignity and authority of great estimation with the Loue of God and more beloued of him then her other sisters Now Desire for reuerence sake offering to kisse her hand was denyed of her in regard that being the daughter of Humility she would not allowe either reuerence or honour to be shewed to her but willing Desire to sitte downe by her he asked of her her orders and conditions OBED I am married to a holy Purpose called to omitte nothing I ought to doe Hee is a mighty strong and worthy Knight who alone is able to subdue put to flight the most dangerous beast in all the world called Selfe Will. Which beast doth destroy kill and swallowe vp all that loue and obey her and shee doth with a kinde of flattering allurement entise and drawe to her al obstinate people of which few forsake her vntill she drawe them into hell vtter damnation The greatest part of people and almost all forsake me notwithstanding it is most certaine that without me no man can finde the Loue of God who is a Lord of so great dignity and excellency that the whole world canot be compared with him And in regard it hath pleased almighty God to bestow so good and noble a husband on me I do not any thing but what he shall command me Neither doe I desire to be eased or remitted from that is commanded me except some vrgent necessity constraine me thereunto And in regard of theeues and robbes which lie so secretly amongst vs that hardly they can be discried or discouered by vs I neuer dare to walke alone DE. What companion doe you vse OBED First I take with me my dogge for a companion called as yours is Good will Next I joyne to me my sister Simplicity and my daughters Douotion Chearefulnesse Diligence perseuerance and Purity But chiefely our Lady Mother Humility doth alwaies assotiate her selfe with mee All these of necessitie must I haue with me if I will securely walke to doe that which I am commanded DE. Tell mee I beseech you How doth your Mother HUmility joyne her selfe with you for that as yet I doe not
is compounded of many herbes The chiefe whereof are Chearefulnesse Loue and Diligence When thou shalt bring me these three sawces to eate then shall our friendship and familiarity be firme and soone after will I bring thee to the speach of my M. Desire much delighted with this direction of this boy said to him DE. Considering you haue acquainted me with your condition desire I wil labour to make these sawces giue them to you Thus Desire continued long in cōference with this Boy treating discoursing many matters with him be gā to be familiar with him deliuering to him the fornamed sawce at last he desired him to opē the gate that thereby he might haue accesse to his M. LOVE Thy request is reasonable cō sidering thou doest what lyeth in thy power stay but a little I will goe call my M. and see if he will come forth to speake with thee CHAPTER 3. Of the Loue of God and our Neighbour and of an other degree of loue and of the of fiee and exercise thereof NOw Desire began to thinke thus with him selfe whether the Loue of God would come forth to talke with him or no cōsidering he was so vile miserable wretched altogither vnworthy with whome so great a Lord shoulde voutsafe to talke and whilst he weas thus debating with himselfe he perceaued one comming towards him who asked him what he would or with whom he would speake DE. Sir I seeke to speak with the loue of God LO I am he which so soone as Desire heard he fell to the ground hauing lost his strength Then the Loue of God taking him by the hand raised him from the ground which made Desire to weepe so abundantly for joy that hardly could he pronounce any word Whereat the Loue of God being tender of hart through the compassion he had of him beganne to weepe also noting the great loue and good will which Desire had towardes him sai LOVE c. Cease off to weepe for I cannot without griefe behold the teares of him that loueth me but tell me who told thee that I was abiding in this house DE. A certaine sheepheard that I mette on the way who directed me to this place where I should finde you LOVE c. What did he tell thee concerning me what is the cause why thou louest me so greatly and hast so great a desire to finde me out Is it because thou hast heard of others that I bestowe many great giftes on my friendes and vse to rewarde with greate benefittes such as serue and obey mee DE. No. But for this cause doe I loue you because you are a good a noble and a famous Lord. And because you bring your friendes and serauntes to the place where they may see and beholde God then the which there is no greater happinesse and felicity in the world The Loue of god hearing what Desire had said was much plesed to heare his holy purpose intēt began to loue him now more then before to whome Desire said I cannot sufficiently meruaile my Lord that you being so mighty and potent a Lord and the Sonne of so great a King admit such as follow and seeke after you to finde you with so great labour difficulty LOVE c. Doe not so For this is a mistery not knowne to all men For many there be that thinke they haue not found or knowe not me when not withstanding I am neare vnto them and then themselues abounde with me And againe there be others that perswade themselues that they haue found and obteyned me when notwithstanding they be farre from me and haue not the least knowledge and vnderstanding of me DE. I beseech you acquainte me with your conditions and office that I may vnderstand whither I be neare or farre of from you for I hould and esteeme of you as of my Lord and friends LOVE c. My office and duety is to loue God for I am called the Sonne of the Knowledge of God DE. How do you loue God LOVE c. I haue a vehement desire to loue him with all my hart with all my strength and with all my power and with assaying any thing whereby I may feele him in such manner as may please him in referring all thinges to his honour prayse and glory and the health and benefitte of mine owne soule And likewise doe I wish that the whole world may know vnderstād him for his exceeding great goodnesse and that all creatures may honour him and yeeld him daily thankes And I enforce my selfe with my earnest desire that neither in great or small thinges much or little I offend or displease him or that I doe any thing contrary to his pleasure And if through mine owne frailety and imbecillity I chaunce to offend him I presently craue and aske forgiuenesse of him and by that meanes our loue is repayred againe And although my Lord and Master be so good so noble and so gratious to me yet am I not content with this first steppe and degree but yet proceede farther and according to my power and ability endeuour to execute nor only what hee commandeth but whatsoeuer the meanest in this Monastery shall commaunde mee in his name And this accustome I my selfe to doe with all reuerence denotion loue joy humility and ready will and that euer in all places and in euery good action And hereby doe I knowe how greatly I loue him when I doe that thing which hee commaundeth mee For thus I perswade my selfe that nothing in the worlde is so gratefull to him bee it to talke with him doe him reuerence or to shewe all seruice to him as to doe that thing which either himselfe or someother shall command me in his name For my Lord and Master saith thus to me How thinkest thou that thy seruices can be acceptable to me or that thou canst bee loued of mee if thou doest not that which I shall commaund thee to doe Or how canst thou say thou louest me For this knowe for certaine that in no other thing thou canst so vnite thy selfe to me or conforme thy will so neare to mine as if thou willingly and gladly execute what I commaund thee CHAPTER 4. The Loue of God proceedeth in his discourse IN this degree of loue I haue resolued with my selfe to performe whatsoeuer I holde my selfe bound to by my vocation and office For since I first professed my selfe of which I neuer repent me I holde my selfe by vow bound to performe that which before I might either haue done or omitted And for that cause I vse diligently to thinke vpon my duety and office resoluting and determining still with my selfe to execute and discharge whatsoeuer I am bound to by vertue of it according to the direction of holy write and learned men Being most assured that many offende through ignorance of that which they are boūd to by duty And if they know what they ought to doe and
yet neglect and omit it then is their offence farre greater and more grieuous for then they offend through malice and not ignorance Farther such thinges as I haue vowed promissed to do which to performe I am bound by duety those with all my endeuours I labour to execute And I haue promissed and vndertaken to my Lord and Master to keepe for euer the faith I haue giuen to three Virgins which abide dwell in this Monastery which are Obedience Chastity Pouerty which three he hath giuen and assigned me as wiues therefore morning and euening I consider with my selfe how that day following I may best serue and please them Saying to my soule Let me se now my soule how thou wilt endeuour with thy selfe this day to obey and please these Virgins and at night shew me my soule how thou hast performed this day what thou didest promisse to doe towards these Virgins whither thou hast grieued or offended any of them Thus doe I still endeuour to shewe my selfe a faithfull seruant to them DE. Wherefore do you thus LOVE c. Because these be the chamber-keepers of my Lord and Master and none are admitted or can talke with him except these Virgins procure him entrance DE. Tell me I pray you what spirituall exercises haue you whereby you serue and keepe promisse with these Virgins LOVE c. Three thinges I propounde and determine to my self which night day I offer vp to them and which constrayne me to serue and be obedient to them The first is called To aske or demand nothing The second To couet or desire nothing The third To thinke on nothing This first Purpose of mine serueth Obedience if so be it be seasoned with a sawce called To doe and then may you cal it to aske to do nothing With which foode Obedience is susteyned by how much more abundantly and purely I offer this vp by so much the more am I in grace fauour with my Lord the greater affection doth he carry to me This selfe same foode called To aske if I season it with another sawce called To haue is called To aske or desire to haue nothing and with that doe I feede the second Virgin called Pouerty DE. Stay here a while I pray you May I not aske to haue any thing that I want and haue neede of LOVE c. No except the thing you desire be most needfull For if there be any thing necessary for thee to haue thou hast thy Superiour who by himselfe or his Officiall shall prouide for thee that thou needest not aske what thou mayest not lawfully aske For he whose charge it is to looke to the whole house will prouide necessaries for all as it becommeth the Superiour to the intent they may more freely serue GOD and attend their spirituall meditations neither shall there be neede that any aske or craue such thinges as be necessary for them And it shall be no little fault in the Superiour to want that discretion as not to giue thinges necessary for those vnder his charge except they demād them Therfore that which I said of asking or demanding ought to be doubly vnderstoode that without offending one may aske if such thinges as shall bee necessary bee not giuen without asking which thing may justly be reprehended especially in Religious persons and if it be a thing of great necessity and not rather to satisfie our contentement For in asking otherwise it may proceede from superfluity curiousity or some other temptation And assure thy selfe that vnder a colour of necessity many vices are often couered especially in thinges that appertayne to the sustinance of the body as meate drinke cloathing and such like DE. How shall I know whither that which I desire proceede of necessity or rather to satisfie my contentement LOVE c. If thou maist forbeare that which thou askest and if thou canst liue without it and art not constrayned to suffer some great or notable hurt in thy body or thy soule which may hap to thee in not asking For if thou shalt bee sure in not flattering thy self that in not asking some great perill or danger may happē to thee then not to aske is a great offence and to aske a merit if thou referre it to God But if thou maist conueniently liue without that which thou askest and endure no great hurt or danger thereby admit thou suffer some labour or griefe in forbearing it prouided still thou exceede not the boundes of discretion in this case not to aske althopugh that which thou askest be some what needefull it shall be a great merit to thee a token of thy vertue although without offending thou maist aske as I haue said For happy in my opinion is the man that suffereth any thing for the Loue of God But if that which thou wilt aske be but such a thing which without hurt of thy body or soule thou maist easely misse thou maist thinke then that to aske is but to satisfie thy minde and pleasure although it be couered with a pretext of some holy purpose For sinne doth not alwais shew it selfe openly but is shadowed often with a colour of holines And thus maist thou knowe if thou askest any thing whither it proceede of necessity or an vansatisfied will And least thou be deceaued through they partiall Iudgement it will be necessary for thee to keepe a diligent watch ouer thy selfe and to bee exercised in vertue Which if thou doest not it will be good that thou be ordered by the aduise of discret men and holy Scripture CHAPTER 5. Of the other two Purposes of the Loue of God to wit To desire nothing and To thinke on nothing LOVE c. hauing breefly explayned my first Purpose wherewith the first two Virgins Obedience Pouerty are as I haue said before nourrished I must shew and declare to thee the cōditions of the other two To desire nothing and To thinke nothing Know therefore for most certayne that this former Purpose to aske nothing is grounded vpon the second To desire nothing For it is most certaine that To haue proceedeth only from To desire Then the cause takē away which is To desire the effect fayleth which is To aske And by that is effected that which is contrary to this which is Not to aske This is the other Purpose wherewith Chastity is nourished which is the third Virgin whose office is To desire no worldly or carnall thing But because this herbe hath an other roote from whence it springeth which is To thinke on nothing for the thing cannot bee desired which is not first thought on I adjoyne a third Purpose which is To thinke nothing But in this place To thinke must be vnderstood of that Thought which is perseuerant settled with a consent liking of reason and will For to thinke nothing doth not consist in the power of man But it resteth in man not to continue or perseuer in ill thoughts but sone
often to my minde and rehearsing them being most certayne that he woul not haue me in-grate and vnmindefull of his giftes CHAPTER 8. Of the third degree of Loue. LOVE c. Now although I haue shewed the first degree or steppe of my loue which is to loue my Lord and Master and neuer to offend him and also the second which is to performe and put in practise all his commandements yet doe I not content my selfe herewith in regarde my loue is so great to him but that I adde yet a third degree or steppe to his loue which is to doe all those thinges that I knowe are pleasing to him or whatsoeuer I can imagine he would I should doe DE. How knowe you that you doe those thinges that please him LOVE c. There be two thinges whereby I may knowe that easely which are if I loue that which he loueth and likewise hate what is hatefull to him Concerning the first which is to loue what he loueth I loue his Sonne the most beautifull sweete and noble of all that euer were and most like his Father and so obedient to him as neuer was or shall be Sonne more obedient to a Father Whome the Father loueth euen as himselfe because he is more like to him then euer Sonne vvas to a Father And so greate is the loue and vnion which is betweene them that they two be but one of one will like power and the selfe same knoweledge Who although they be distinct in persons yet are they both one in essence For this Sonne the Father hath made a garment with the handes of his goodnes like to that which Sheepheardes doe weare which the Sonne hauing put on departed out of the priuy Chamber of his princely Father and yet for euer remayneth with him And thus he liueth here in this Monastery and conuerseth with vs. For otherwise we could not behold him Moreouer when his Father would send him ouer all the world cladde with this garment a little traueling scrippe he entred also into this desert to seeke out his sheepe that were wandered and strayed And as hee trauailed through this desert the Father permitted that he should be killed of wolues and deuoured of dogs and would giue him no helpe although he could but would haue him endure a most cruell death by these wolues more painefull to him then euer any sffered being his flesh most tender in that he weas the Son of a King All this did our Lord of his exceeding loue towardes vs that all we that dwell and abide in his house might know and trie his charity and thereby might loue him againe considering that first he loued vs so greatly that he spared not his one only Son but deliuered him to die for the loue he bare to vs al. Whilest the Loue of God was relating this discourse Desire being wholy wounded to the hart could not refraine from vehement weeping But the Loue of God going on with his discourse said farther And although God the Father hath suffered his Son to be killed yet notwithstanding he loueth him so exceedingly that by his great omnipotency he soone raysed him from death much more beautifull and gloriously triumphing bringing with him the sheep which he came to seeke others being left in this wildernesse that they might be fedde and become fat with the knowledge of him he hauing a perpetual and watchfull care ouer them So at length returning againe to his Princely Father he sitteth nowe on his right hand speaking and making intercession for vs al being ouercome with to great a loue towardes vs. For I am of this opinion that except we were spared for his sake long since had we beene driuen cleane out of this Monasterie so wicked and miserable we are and so negligently and sloathfully wee serue him wholy forgette him and contemne him and so little care and remembrance we haue of him But the Omnipotēt father loueth this Son so greatly that in my opinion nothing can be more acceptable to him in this world then that we should loue this his Sonne with him For which cause I endeuour labour to loue him to do those thinges which I thinke pleasing to him DE. What is it that you can doe acceptable to him LOVE c In remembring and speaking of his most holy life his paines laboures his most bitter death and Passion his holy commandements and as neare as I can conformity my self according to his manners For who soeuer my Lord Master seeth most carefully to imitate the life of his Son him doth he most loue and holde deare to him And for this cause was it his holy will and pleasure that he should come liue here amongst vs that by that meanes he might teach vs how we should liue who before liued no better then bruite beasts Therefore hath our ord set him before our eyes as a mirrour or looking glasse that euery one may knowe whether he doe or omit what his pleasure is and may see and behold in the life of his Sonne as in a glasse whether his works be good or badde Neither is there any thing in all the world by which we may more trulie come to the knowledge thereof And yet besides this there is one thing more which my Lord and M. loueth that is my Boy called the loue of our Neighbour whome he esteemeth so much and holdeth so deare that whatsoeuer we doe to him be it good or bad he taketh as if it were done to himselfe DE. How doe you loue this Boy LOVE c. Euen as my selfe And first I perswade my selfe that he is better then I am and although I execute a higher place yet in all thinges that are agreeable to vertue I obey him I farther am carefull that by no meanes I afflict him or giue him occasion of sorrowe but shewe all loue and kindnesse to him that I can I neuer haue sinister conceite of him but rather excuse him all that I may I neuer call him by anie name of disgrace I most willingly dissemble and hide his naturall defectes and imperfections In distreste and aduersitie I lament and bewaile him In his absence I detract him not neither suffer others to doe if I may hinder it I wish and desire that my Lord and Master be better beloued of him then of my selfe and that it would please God to make him as good or better then I my selfe am I enuie him nothing either for corporall or spirituall giftes bestowed on him by God or for any thing which he enjoyeth in this world but rejoyce in his prosperity and lament in his aduersity Farther I thinke him to be the Angell of God and my selfe to be vnworthy to be his seruant This doe I for that I knowe him to be beloued of my Master Also I loue those thinges vvhich appertaine to our societie towardes which I carry a very great zeale in regarde that they appertaine to the worshippe honour of
domesticall seruants assist her I vse others helpe and place on my right hand Gods grace which may strengthen and defende me from this dangerous enemy I also craue the ayde and assistance of my husband and then say to her Sister I haue my selfe despised my flesh and make no better accompte of my selfe than of a labouring beast and beasts seeke not after dairity and decliate fare but only that as may be sufficient to sustayne nature and are content with that which is allowed them by the discretion of their Master And if the Master finde him to be wanton and deuouring he musleth him that he neuer eateth but when what in his discretion he shall like of And so Sister in this respect I am content to be vsed and ruled like a beast besides the Loue of God hath giuen me a bridell which is made of Sobriety that I cannot eate but at wonted times and that I desire not or looke to haue any other meate or more daintely dressed then such as ordinariley is set before me and therewith I satisfie and content my selfe Farther the Loue of God hath enjoyned me to this also if I will serue and please him as I ought to eate temperately and moderately and only for necessary sustenance of that what soeuer it be that is set before me that for good manners I alwayes leaue some what in the dish thereby to shewe that more is allowed me then I can well eate For when all is eaten that is sett before vs it is as much as if you shoud say my allowance is not sufficient for mee neither am I content therewith therefore I desire to haue more set on the table And yet farther this rule is giuen mee to obserue for the Loue of God That I would and should desire lesse to bee allowed mee and the same worse dressed then the allowance of my Sisters and alwaies to wish something to be wanting about me therein to rejoyce for the Loue of God By these like meanes this malepert wanton maide is ouercome and driuen away from olesting me But when againe shee shall prouoke and sturre me to wanton pleasure not only by my owne flesh but also by others I then fly from her as fast as I can secluding my selfe frō al such company as may allure or entice me to pleasure or concupiscence And against this assault I find that to seclude my selfe from cōpany is a present remedy and most soueraigne preseruatiue Neither doth this enemy assault me only in my body but in my soule also by suggesting many ill thoughts Against which also I vse the remedy of flight and hide my selfe either in some corner of a rocke or els in some vnfrequented and solitary place and there settle all my thoughts and cogitations vpon my most sweete Sauiour IESVS calling to minde his most holy life his passion torments and most bitter death Also meditating vpon the cruell torments of Hell the seuere and iust Iudgement of Almighty GOD. My owne departure from this miserable world and that of necessity I must appeere before the Iudgement seate of God there to giue accompt of al my thoughts wordes and deeds By these and like means I ouercome and put to flight this forenamed maiden who is the Lieuetenant of the castle of Pride CHPATER 11. Of the concupiscence of the eyes and pride of life YEt farther to ouercome and cleane subdue this enemy it is also requisite to vanquish and conquer her companion I meane Cocupiscence of the eyes the steward or gouernour of the house of Pride who alwaies giueth winges to Concupiscence of the flesh For continually shee ministreth occasion to her companion who not-withstanding I ouercome with my holy purpose For so soone as shee commeth I say thus to her Sister I am no better then a labouring beaste who neuer desireth superfluities or more then is allowed him but alwaies is contented with so much as is necessary neither expecteth curiosity in that which is to be had of necessity litle regarding whether his saddell and bridle be guilded or imbrodered or whether the stable be curiosly adorned but content if conueniently he may stand lie Considering then that for the Loue of God I account my selfe no better then a beaste I will also vse my body as if it were a beast And as the breaker and rider of a stiffe necked horse with the raines of a bridle enforceth him to stoppe turne so the Loue of God hath briddeled and tide me with the bridell and chayne of Schamefastnes and Bashfulnes that I shall not curiuously see couet the vanities of the world For I ought not behold that I ought not desire And the Loue of God hath taught me to say when I see a thing beautiful pleasing rare singuler or curious I neuer will settle my loue on thee but refuse thee and hold thee but as a meere vanity therefore remebring the worthines of my creation I will not bestowe my loue or fix my affection on so vile so base so transitory a thing but on that which in it selfe is the only treasure and goodnes and a beauty which neither age or sickenes can blemish I meane on my sweete Sauiour and Redeemer IESVS who demandeth of me my loue and affection and may iustly chalenge the same as his owne By these and like meanes this other Maide is ouercome Now these two being vanquished in manner as I haue told you there yet remayneth the last which is Mistris of these one more terrible crafty and more suttle than the other euer lying in wayte to hinder good actions her name is called Pride of Life who when soeuer shee commeth in hither amongst vs is alwayes attended with one or other hand-maide and still bringeth with her either Good or euell estimation But straight I say to her a beast is no better to be accompted of than a beast neither is to be thought worthy of honour or estimation but rather ignominy and base contempt Then sometime she commeth complayning to me and saith see how my superiours behaue themselues towardes me and vse me both in age witte and judgment I am not their inferiors yet they vse such and such a one with better respect then me But presently I finde out her craft and subtelty and preuenting her reply A beast is not to be vsed but basely and according to his Masters discretion to be whipped and beaten For If at any time his Master shall vse him but gently and play with him he presently will kicke and forgette the duety due to him Therefore a wise Master and men of good gouernment although they loue their beastes neuer so well yet will neuer vse extroardinary and vndue familiarity to them but alwayes carry themselues with a kinde of seuere grauity considering such familiarit6y is neuer attributed to humility curtesie loue or affability but rather to simplicity and meere fondnesse For such familiarity doth rather hurt then benefitte a beast
But a discreete and wise Master will rather endeuour with all possible diligence that his beast or horse keepe his right way in their journey and carry carefully the burthen laide on their backes then that the world shoulde thinke him fonde of them or expect to be held a kinde and louing Master and one that should seeke to be praysed of them For by these meanes it might happen as oft we see it that either the Master towardes the beast or the beast forgette himselfe towardes the Master when the Master vseth not such reason moderation and discretion as he ought and that indiscretion may giue occasion to the beast to stray out of their boundes farther then is allowed and so by little and little vsing an ill custome the Master shall not dare to direct or gouerne according to the superiority he hath ouer his beast but if hee chaunce for their negligence to strike or beate them they presently will resist and kicke againe at him And then if the beast happen either to cast off his burthen or else to carry it contrary to his Masters minde he must needes winke at it and suffer him to goe where and as hee will himselfe and so he to be obedient to the beast not the beast to him Euen so Sister were it like to prooue vvith mee if I should yeelde to my owne sensuall affections and be carried away with worldlie pleasures and vanities But hee that loueth me and hath care ouer me doth with his discretion correct me and bridle my vvill that I fall not to open shame and so bee vndone but for the loue he carrieth to my soule he doth chastice discipline my body at his discretion Neither doe I my selfe wish to be vsed better then a beast At some other time the same Pride of life cōmeth to me vnder the colour of Enuy and complaineth thus See how such and such an office is giuen to this and that body But no reckening or accompt is made of me One is made gouernesse and an other vndergouernesse the third the stewarde and an other secretary but my selfe which am inferiour to none of them in yeares or desert am neglected and nothing regarded at all No place of credit is committed to me wherein I might rule or command ouer others but alwayes I am dejected like a base kitchen Wench Yea I am made the vnderling of the meanest mayde in the house And now I finde it true that they of best desert are commonly and for the most part least considered For which cause hence forth I will deserue lesse for I see they that counterfette to be lambes are deuored of Wolues Such and like complaints doth shee oft make to me as though I knew not the grounde from whence it came To whome I answere Sister I haue not giuen ouer and forsaken the world and betaken my selfe to this solitary and sequestred life thereby to rule others and to moderate their causes For since my first entrace heather I haue vowed obedience and therefore will performe that which I came hither to doe and for which I was called and which I vndertoke to accomplish at my entrance For God will neuer demande or aske accompte of me how much I haue commanded and ruled others or with how much honor or how great offices I haue bin exalted in the world but how humbly and dutifully I haue obeyed his commandements and how willingly I haue humbled my selfe to my superiours and subjected debased my owne wilful stubborne rude mind Therefore Sister I looke only to discharge and performe my owne office in that place and degree to which I am called by God and suffer others to looke likewayes to that charge of theirs to which by Gods prouidence they are as my selfe called Meane time this one thing I knowe for certayne that I liue in the state of assured saluation That is vnder true obediēce humility and subjection from which no man can fall except he first clyme higher And so hereof I haue no just cause to complayne but rather to rejoyce prayse yeelde daily thanks to Almighty God in that he hath debarred and as it weare taken from me the meanes and occasion of falling into the great perils and dangers into which high offices and places of dignity and preferment are wonte to drawe and throwe headlong men that seeke not after perfection Which is truely verified by this saying of Saint AVGVSTINE I neuer founde Gods ire indignation more against me then that it pleased him to appoint me a cōmander ouer others which truely Desire ought not seeme strange to thee For as this wicked Wench which beareth such sway in the house of Pride is more prone ti wickednes then all her fellowes so must we if throughly we will subdue her vse greater pollicy strength and exercise of vertue And to the end I protract not the time with circumstances I now will deliuer no vaine discourse to thee but will instruct thee by what meanes and groundes thou shatl be able to ouercome and put to flight this crue of wicked Maydens When any of these which so euer shee be shall come and seeme to complaine as I haue declared before be thou ruled by me and follow my example As if Concupiscence of the flesh shall come say I am allowed both to little meate and yet that is cold and not cleanly dressed my wyne is sowren euery thing in our house is sluttishly ordered answere her but thus she that hath more then she deserueth hath no cause to complaine But thou deseruest not browne bread cold water which most holy Religious men haue beene contented to liue with Therefore thou which art so wicked so sloathfull so disdainefull redy to complaine voide of all deuotion inconstant enuous amd vnthankefull to God doest not deserue the coursest bread and water Which being true yet hauing good bread wyne and other meate Why shouldest thou complaine and hast more then thy desert answere her a like if she finde falte with her apparell The like reply make also to Concupiscence of the eyes if she seeke after or wish for this thing or that say O wreatch that thou art who by thy owne desert art not worthy to enjoy the least good that is Yet hast thou the vse of many deuout and vertuous books by reading of which if thou wouldest thou mightest become good And although neuertheles one where sufficient for thee Yet hast thou holy books of prayers and meditations Tell me what is it thou desirest more truly vnder a shewe of desiring things of necessity thou longest after and seekest for thinges of superfluity then the which nothing can be more opposite to the vowe of Pouertie And although thereby thy merit be not clearely lost Yet assure thy selfe it is much impaired And nothing can more dishonor shame him that professeth in pouerty to imitate our Sauiour then to haue lesse vertue and tast of Religion then the
regarded aboue the Master No. Away then Negligence For I must be busied in those thinges which are my fathers Smale is the merit we shall receaue here if we be not free from all wearinesse of the place For cursed is he that doeth the workes of God sloathfully and negligently For God seeketh not seruice that is done him by compultion neither is he delighted with vnwilling sacrifices but with that which is done with a willing minde and proceedeth from a sincere perfect hart Now this old accursed Wench being put to her flight we must also banish her foolish hadmaydes who by how much the more they be wicked and dangerous by so much the more are they vehemente and strong and the lesse we labour to mortifie and subdue them the harder shall we finde it to banish and expell them The first of them which is Malice accompaned with her daughter Anger I answere in this manner so sone as shee assaulteth me Sister Charity is patient and gentle then taking the assistance of my husbande my Purpose I suppresse her againe Nothing can be inflicted to this beast so seueare but that she hath deserued farre greater correction If then I haue deserued greater punishments I may justly say I am fauourably spared not being vsed in rigor according to my deserts And it is the part of a gentle beast not to behaue himself stubbournly or rudely to his master his whole family but farre cōtrary to that quietly modestly gently to all men For although perhaps to day his Master beate him Yet to morrowe againe he will feede him wātonly wil behaue himselfe toward him like a louing kinde Master And although perhaps outwardly he make no shewes of affection Yet inwardly doubtles he esteemeth him hightly but yet dissembleth his affection and loue least hee take stomacke being pampered and so kicke against his Master BEsides a beast doth sone forget any wrong or iniury is pleased againe if his master but stroke him on the head or the necke So I my selfe being iniured by any one of my Sisters imagining I am a beast a base vassall beare it paciently for the Loue of God and suffer them to vse me according to their pleasures assuing my selfe that I cannot endure so many iniuries from them as my owne vnworthines doth daily deserue And knowing farther that our lord permitteth for the heynousnes of my sins that I be afflicted of them here in this life so to learne to suffer afflictions for his sake And now se this maide who thou sayest doth wish me nothing but hurt offence that other who thou sayest doth secretly backbite me al these other of whom I am so hated as thou sayest These I say hate not or malice me but my vices faultes defectes my malice my ill manners and conditions most of al my obstinate stubbourne will Therefore I haue cause rather to thinke they loue me for what herein they do proceedeth from zeale and a most holy purpose neither haue they any agreement with Malice or thinke her meete to comfort with Vertue Let vs now therefore consider more iudicially If I be or would be thought the hādmaide of God I must hate detest euen from my hart al my sins defectes offences imperfections the pronesse of my fraylty which draweth me to these which being true why should I malice or stomacke those which doe but that which my selfe am bound to To conclude Know that these who thou sayest speake ill of me and detract me yet not withstanding are my sisters whom I am cōmanded to loue not to hate And therfore wil I do that which I am enioyned Yet meane while let them consider and weigh with themselues why and to what end they afflict iniure me Now againe at some other time she trieth me with Enuie a maide who vseth a two edged sword hurteth her Sisters both in body and soule This Wench is indeede a dangerous enemie whose chiefest felicitie is in her Sisters hurt and is neuer more grieued then at there vertue and good life Therefore when shee commeth to assault me I say Sister you complaine and seeme to be grieued that others in this world possesse greater riches that others are endued with more rare bewtie that others haue more abundantly the giftes of nature then your selfe but I take comfort and reioyce euen in that and think my selfe happy in wanting them For neither in this life or the life to come Desire I any thing but IESVS Christ my Sauiour he is my treasure and the treasure of Angels he is my beauty and the beauty of all creatures he is my gayne and the fountayne of all goodnes Let others fix their loue where best it shall like them I desire only my Sauiour IESVS and his loue euer doe I thirst after with him is no difference twixt ritch and poore he neuer distinguisheth twixt beautifull and fowle Yet here thou complaniest sayest to me this and that body abounde and excell in wealth and beauty such such happines is giuen them and not me But on the contrary this I reply Although these parties are possessed of these pleasures yet haue I my selfe thinges of greater esteeme For so noble and so great is the minde that I carry that it skorneth to bestowe loue or affection on so base so abject and so transitory pleasures And considering that my name is called HUmility by humility meane I to conquer my selfe And I finde the seruants and children of God to abounde with these and greater blessinges but not my selfe who am a base vassall and no way worthy to be partaker thereof Now Enuie seeing shee preuayleth little with her former objections vrgeth in an enuious manner the gift of spirituall vertues saying beholde such a sister who thou knowest right well is more giuen to vertue and deuotion then thou art is more conuersant with God and more exercised in contemplation and is a Virgin of noted sobriety and modesty To whome I streight answere For what cause desire I to be religious or to be vertuous and deuoted to prayer because others should thinke better of me then they doe of my sisters praise me honour me or admire my vertues or else because I would be more daintely fedde cladde more costly or abound in worldly pleasures No truely but for this cause only that I may serue and please God and that my sweete Sauiour Iesus may by me and in me be praysed and honoured Therefore is it my dutie and that which I am bound to rejoyce in when I see that my most louing Lord and Master hath such vertuous deuout seruants that be wholy giuen to his seruice and prayer and endued with most rare holines of life and spende their time in Religious exercises And I hold it my duety to pray to God to giue them greater perfection more abundat grace whereby he may be more highly honored of them For if I had
but the least tast of Gods loue in me wherein not my part duety to labour what I cold that he might be knowen honored and loued of all the world to pray that he would bestowe his grace on all men whereby he might of them be continually honored Therefore most accursed Wench flie farre from my sight Thou knowest not what charitable Loue is considering thou art the daughter of that wicked damnable and false Apostata For I would if it pleased God that he depriued me of all spirituall corporall good which of his bountie he hath bestowed on me and giue them to others who with them would honor and prayse him more then I doe who am so barraine and vnfruitfull a soyle and haue receaued his grace and giftes in vaine For I desire nothing in this world but Gods prayse and honor and will daily seeke it how dearely so euer I obtayne it See then wreatched Wench how farre thou art deceaued Markest thou not that God knoweth what he doeth he seeth plainely that these vessels into which so abundantly he infuseth his blessings be farre more pure of a more humble spirit then I my self And therefore iustly hath denyed mee such grace seing right well that I am full of pride a vessell filled with anger and malice which through haughtines of minde would proudely attempt to scale if it cold the heauens themselues which duely pondered I rest contented with the will and pleasure of my sweete Lord IESVS neither desire I to finde ought else but him CHAPTER 13. By what meanes we may expell all Malice from our selues THe third daughter of Malice is called Sloath a most dangerous enemy who is cold and lasie in spirituall exercises and the seruice of GOD Wherein consisteth the summe of our saluation Her am I wonte to answere in this manner Thou desirest Sister and willingly wouldest perswade me neither to frequent the seruice of GOD nor to vse at all anie spirituall exercises And therefore of purpose to conquer and subdue thee I will spende more time in watching and praying and diume contemplation where vnto she thus replyeth Seest not thou thy selfe euen frozen with a cold deuotion and to feele no whitte at all any zeale of Gods seruice in thee but to vse thy exercises against thy owne voluntary disposition which prouoketh iustly the indignation of God Neither doest thou ought els but tempt God therein who desireth no vnwilling or impulsiue seruices but such as proceede from a chearefull and willing minde Then reply I againe Away thou wicked wreatch I perceaue thy meaning Knowest thou not that at such time I shew my loue greater to God when I serue him with my owne will be it neuer so small then when I finde my selfe endued with extraordinary deuotion by him art thou ignorant that God sometimes of purpose withdraweth his grace thereby to try and prooue our strength And then when he perceaueth vs to offer vp and bestowe on him that little deuotion which is remayning in vs he doubleth his grace heauenly consolation in vs. Yet so that finding our selues voide of inwarde sensible grace we cast not cleane away our good will harty desire Therfore whereas thou askest why being so cold and cleane voide of deuotion yet I goe to pray considering as thou sayest that is but to tempt God assure thy selfe although I felt in me farre lesse deuotion and will to serue God yet that not withstanding I would frequent my prayers and would set my selfe in the sight of our Lord neither would I speake or desire ought of him but standing before him would yeeld to him al due honor and reuerence imagining himselfe to be present in my sight and that I beheld him and that there I stoode before his high diuine and fearefull Majesty That he who is the fire of loue would inflame my harte when he should thinke conuenient Therefore submit I my self to his holy will am content with that which it shall please him to graunt me And the weaker fainter and colder I finde my selfe so much the nearer I will come to this fire For if I will depart from it then shall I finde my selfe farre colder then before Therefore depart from me thou naughty Wench For I doe not vse frequent my daily prayers my deuout contemplations and spirituall exercises for my owne contentment comfort or delight but only to this end thereby to serue my Lord God honour him considering I know we it to be his holy will and pleasure that I should do so and that I exercise my selfe in all vertue and holines to the honour prayse of his holy name Now when this wicked mayden with her practises cannot withdrawe me from the Loue of God She taketh a new course and laboureth to winne my loue from my fellow Sisters And taking the assistance of her before named Nouices Suspition and rash iudgmēt assaulteth me againe perswadeth me to hate and malice my sisters and to carry a sinister opinion of them whereby I should either suspect some ill in them or else rashly without some just cause condemne thē hence proceede contempt repining murmuring and detraction But my selfe with the assistance of my Purpose marking her presently answere It beseemeth not so base and so abject a maide as my selfe to judge amisse of my sisters or Superiours neither lawfull for sinners to intermeddle with sacred vesselles or for beastes to come nigh the holy mountaine It best beseemeth me to account all my sisters vertuous and holy but my selfe most wreatched and full of foule sinne For it is a secret to me what all men are in the sight of GOD or in what manner they shall ende this mortall life As for my selfe I knowe right well that my pronesse to sinne and naughty appetites and desires woulde drawe me headlong to the pitte of hell were I not preserued by Gods diuine grace and mercie Therefore knowe I right vvell what I may feare of my selfe and suspect that is whether my conscience my wordes and deedes be good for I know my selfe but am a stranger to others And therefore so much as appertayneth to my fellowes I will choose the safest course that is to thinke and speake all good of them assuring my selfe thereby to gaine but neuer to loose For nothing is more dangerous then to be ruled by our owne will and to refuse a certainty for an vncertainety Charity neuer thinketh amisse And I finde it a charge great enough for me to judge and discerne mine owne conscience my affections my wordes and deedes and not to busie my selfe in censuring these not curiously to intermeddle in others actions For vvho made me a Iudge betweene God and my sisters or betweene them and their owne consciences Truly no man Avoide thou therefore or hast thou ought else to say I plainely see thou art nowe ouercome in seeking to suggest to me a suspition of my sisters vvhich is a most damnable and
with great contentment And being guided out of this Monastery by the forenamed Steward who tolde him he had now seene al the virgins of this Monastery he asked if there were no other thing to bee seene ST If thou shalt well obserue what thou hast here heard and seene and shalt with thy best endeuour seeke to put them in execution thou art sufficiently furnished to finde out the Loue of God But yet before thou depart hence I will shew thee a tree that groweth in our gardē Desire beholding this goodly tree beganne much to admire it and the rather because it carried two sorts of fruit and said to the Steward DE. What kinde of fruit is this ST The fruit that groweth on the lower boughes which are pale and of diuers colours is called Distrust of our selues But that which groweth on the toppe of the tree and is of a pleasant red colour is called Trust in God with which fruit all that come hither are to be fedde For except they shall feede vpon this fruit their labour is in vaine and to no ende come they hither DE. Wil it please you to bestowe part thereof on me that I may eate thereof in my journey I am to take STEW I will eate thereof of the fruit of the lower boughes which is Distrust of thy selfe as much as shall be necessary and fill all thy pockets with the fruit of the higher boughes that thou maist eate therof in thy journey this wil serue thee vntil thou come to the house of the Loue of God Now Desire sufficiently satisfied with the fruit of the lowe boughes filled his pockets and bosome with the fruit of the higher boughes and said DE. I beseech you Sister now shew to me the speediest and most ready way to the house of the Loue of God STEW I rejoyce to se thee so furnished and desirous to vndertake the journey to finde the Loue of God Yet not withstāding I feare if thou trauaile alone thou wilt hardly finde out the readiest way therefore wil I giue thee trusty companions of our society who shall doe and guide thee the right way thou art to take DE. Is not Good wil my dogge sufficient for that STEW No truely For although he be very good yet is not he sufficient for such a journey wherein are encountred not only many dangerous wilde beasts hollowe pittes rough wayes bushes bryers but theeues spoylers and robbers and such as seeke to kill and destroy all passengers wherefore it is wisdome not to trust to thy dogge alone DE. For these alleaged reasons I pray you appoint me such cōpanions as you thinke necessary STEW Then take in thy company our Porter the Feare of our Lord who is a worthy and excellent man whose company if thou wilt not forgoe take likewise with thee his daughter Bashfulnes whome to be sure to keepe take an herbe with thee called Humble casting downe of thy eyes And yet farther take with thee an other companion called Simplicitie And now Desire goe on thy way being garded with Gods blessing But yet marke well this one lesson although thou chaunce to loose the Feare of God or Simplicitie Yet be sure to keepe warely thy dogge about thee for he will serue to finde them againe And see that thou giue him of the fruit in thy pocket to eate of And when thou art gone hence keepe the way which leadeth on the left hand where thou shalt finde a path which is a nearer way then others which will bring the directly to the house of Charitie wherein dwelleth the Loue of God DE. What is the name of that path that if I happe to misse my way I may aske it of other STEW It is called Patience which is the ready and nearest way to the house of Humilitie and Charitie †THE SECOND PART CHAPTER 1. Of Patience DESIRE being now well refreshed with the aboue named fruites and accompanied with Good will his dogge and the Feare of God the Porter on the one side and with Simplicity on the other side hauing also his pockets filled with the fruit of Confidence in God departed chearefull out of the house of Humility willingly vndertoke the way of Patience Which although he were told to be short pleasant Yet found he it rough had and vnpleasant by reason of many brables bushes which made him cōplaine say to Simplicitie DE. O good God how hard and difficult a way is this contrary to that I thought it to be SIMP Let not that seeme strange to thee Desire for therefore is it called the way of Patience which if it were not sharpe full of difficulties it should not be calloed and knowne by that name neither should the house to which it leadeth be held in so great esteeme if the way were playne and easie and passible for all people But as it is none passe it but those that be throughly exercised And hast thou not heard the old prouerbe That no good thing can be obteyned without labour and paine or pleasant but first by tasting the sower wherefore hauing now vndertaken and entred the way thou must of necessity endure the hardnes comforted with this that it will not long continue For whosoeuer will seeke to take the fish must be contented to wette his foote And coldest thou imagine that a thing so pretious as the Loue of God cold be obteyned without labour and payne Remember the saying of Seneca the Philosopher A thing of worth cannot be bought for a trifle For with great labours wee atchiue great matters And thou art deceaued Desire if thou thinke to get so rich a treasure with no labour neither wouldst thou make any great accompt of the Loue of God if thou coldest finde him without any trauaile Goe to therefore coragiously and feare not labour considering that after it thou shalt rest and bee comforted vvith the Loue of God and thou wilt esteeme the greatlier of him and loue him better for the more payne thou endurest in finding him out the greater will be thy joy and contentement after And if thou fortune to be weary in the way eate of the fruit which thou hast called Confidence of God and thou shalt finde thy selfe to be strengthned againe But if thou wilt not feele the weariesomes of thy journey do as trauailers do that passe ouer the paine with singing as they goe Desire some what cōforted with this direction of Simplicitie said DE. How can we sing being accompaned with this reuerend and graue old Father SIMP It is his custome to shewe himselfe graue in gesture and apparell but otherwise he is sociable and pleasant in conuersation for he is the brother of the Loue of God singeth sweetly especially when he heareth vs sing not for wantonnes and leuity but to cheare vp our spirits and comfort our selues being weary in our journey DE. How shall I sing that haue no voyce SIMP Thou canst not lacke voyce that art a voyce
journey was come at last to so joyfull an end Wherefore comming to the gates and finding them locked he beganne to call and knocke thereat But not withstanding stāding his calling knocking no man appeared that would giue him an answere Thē spake Simplicity And told him it were requisite that he cryed lowder for by that meanes he should be hard although they with in were a sleepe or else deafe bidde him take the two hammers that hong at the gate presently some would come open it for him These two hammers were called the one To sigh The other To cry Therefore she bid him knocke cry a lowde for these dores should not be here if they were not to be opened therefore are these hamers hanged at them that such a shal knocke may be admitted in Thus cōtinued Desire stil crying knocking long before the Loue of God would opē the gate neither did Desire as yet know him To whome the Loue of God at length spake as foloweth What seek you here brother or what lack you to knocke call thus peraduenture you are weary with your long expectation But it is our custome and manner to feigne our selfs deafe therby to try their patiēce that come hither And it chaunceth often that when we so any wax weary perswade thēselues that the gate must be opened to them so sone as they come we suffer them to depart euen as they came for none are admitted to enter hither that shall thinke themselues worthily to deserue the place that we ought to receitie them of right and duety Therefore tell me art thou one of those De. No Sir I am not For notwithstanding I haue passed ouercome many labours yet am I sure that I haue no way deserued to be admitted in here but altogither vnworthy except it shall please you to receaue me vpō your owne goodnes mercy LOVE c. What is the cause thou desirest to be admitted or what seekest thou to find here within this house DE. I am come sir hither from the house of Humility accompaned with these graue honest companions haue passed my jorney by the path of Patiēce Only to seeke the Loue of God who as it is told me dwelleth here within LOV. c. Doest thou bring me no token whereby I may knowe that thou commest from the house of Humility DE. I bring two tokens The one wherof was giuen me in the house of Humility and it is called Knowledge of my selfe The other haue I got my selfe in my journey and that is called Knowledge of God LOVE c. I am very well pleased to se thee so prouided but yet tell mee this one thing doest thou perswade thy selfe that by reason of these two knowledges we ought of duety to receaue and admit thee DE. Be it farre frō me to haue such a thought I desire to be receaued only through your grace and mercy For I am not sure whither both these knowledges wherwith I am instructed be trulie written or no. This I know for certaine that I continued sometime in the house of Humility and there I learned and knewe the house the Virgins and their conditions they themselues telling me But whether I haue well digested the fruit I eate there or whether they agree well with my stomacke although they be sweete in taste I confesse I knowe not Neither am I sure whether I reaped any benefit by my journey For often did I fall the bushes and brambles oft pricked me and in a manner I was drawne hither by force of my cōpanions Therfore Sir there is none of these thinges that I bring with me that I can tell you any certainety of but mine owne malice vilenes sloath and imperfectiō And amongst other things which cause me to come hither to seeke the Loue of God one especiall cause is that I vnderstand he is a singular good Chirurgion of whome I desire to be purged and to be let bloud And farther men say that with his only looke he presently discouereth the imperfections and faults in the hart and whosoeuer he toucheth he doth presently cure LOVE c. Why doest thou desire to be made so pure and sound DE. Because as I haue learned of others it is allowed to none to enter in hither that shal be vncleane but to such as shall be only pure sounde and vndefiled LOVE c. Considering them that thou puttest thy whole trust and confidence in vs stay here a while For thou canst not enter in or speake with the Loue of God except first thou talke with a Boy of his tarry here therefore and I will call the Boy who will direct thee what thou art to doe and how thou maist come to the speach of his Master CHAPTER 2. Of the loue of our Neighbour HEre Desire stayed expecting greatly the comming of the Boy that shoulde bring him in to the speach of his Master who presently came forth His name was caled the Loue of our Neighbour whome when Desire behelde he could not through joyrefraine from weping for the exceeding great loue hee carried to his Master LOVE c. What is the cause that thou weepest thus considering in this house all are chearefull and merry and none is heard to weepe or lament DE. Ioy not sorrow maketh me to weepe LOVE c. Who do you seeke for here DE. The Loue of God LOVE c. I am his Boy therefore if thou seekest my master thou must first talke be acquainted with me For my M. maketh so great account of me that he wil not speake with those that loue not me DE. I most willingly would learne and knowe thy conditions and for the loue of thy M. be acquainted with thee LOVE c. If thou wouldest be admitted amongst the number of my friends Thou must euery morning giue me in steed of my breakfast a certaine sawce called Hūble thought an other at noone called Hūble speach a third at euening caled Hūble work DE. Where shall I find out or get these sawces LOVE Humility her husband holy Purpose maketh the first which is Humble thought wher by she thinketh and esteemeth her selfe more vile base and inferiour than any other and accounteth of her selfe no better then a labouring beast This holy purpose prepareth a certaine Electuary for Humilitie called Contēpt of our selfe to make this swace which we now speake of an other hearbe is to be added called Good opiniō of our neighbour of which cōpoundes hūble thought is made And in all this prouince is not a skilful ler man to make this swace then the forenamed husband of Humilitie whome so soone as thou shalt get thy friend he will instruct thee how to make this sawce The other called Hūble speach is made compounded of three other hearbes which are Humilitie Gentlenesse and Affability which must be strowed with a fine powder called Slownes and Sparing The third which is Humble worke
to collect himselfe and to turne to God Now when this herbe To thinke is watered with the water called to See Wee must then adde to these holy Purposes a certayne powder that is called Strict garde of our eyes For this is most necessary These three Purposes doe not only purge and make cleane my soule from all worldly affares from al selfe-will and from all spot and stayne but besides that I may with greater zeale serue my Lord God procure me great purity of hart ridde me of all priuate affection and loue and joyne and vnite me wholly to my Lord God and Sauiour And to these three Purposes I haue reduced all my other spirituall exercises as well those which are appertayning to Humility as such as are agreable to al other vertues because I knowe perfection to consist in them And suffer not thy selfe to bee perswaded that in vayne I yeeld obedience to these three Virgins for I finde their fauour and goodnes great towardes me who plentifully bestow on me all kinde of goodnes The one of them called Pouerty hath lately bestowed on me a ritch ornament DE. I desire to see it where doe you keepe it LOVE c. I keepe it in two places in my hart and in my chamber And it is so great and of so high estimation that I could not possibly keepe it in my hart vntill I banished and vtterly excluded thence all worldly loue affection and desire neyther could it possibly be conteyned in my chamber vntill I had cast thence all superfluous thinges reseruing only the Crucifix and some few other bookes DE. What is the name of this ornament It is called Nothing at all and it is the especiall and chiefest treasure of Pouerty who is the richest Lady of all the world and who possesseth so much treasure as here selfe doth desire CHAPTER 6. Of the office of the Loue of God and of prayer in the same degree IN this foresaid office of Loue which is to doe that which my Lord and Master commaundeth and my duety bindeth me to I must vse a certaine condition or circumstance which is that if at any time according to my office and place I am set in as being attendant in his chamber I come vnto him either to doe him seruice or to craue something of him or else to to speake to him I endeuour to shew and present my selfe with as great purity and humility of hart as I can For by how much cleaner in hart I present my selfe to him by so much more clearnesse I see and beholde him And I accustome to craue the fellowshippe of my Brother the Feare of God that he with an Aunte of mine called Reuerence woulde goe also with me De. What is the reason you take Reuerence with you LOVE c. I weigh and consider with my selfe who I am and who my Lord and Master is I think vpon his most sacred Majesty who of right and desart ought to be reuerenced and feared as one most worthy of all honour and loue Father I vse to contemplate how al the blessed soules fall prostrate before him adore him and praise him and that by admiring and praysing his so great and excellent goodnes and Majesty they be rauished and in a sort transformed into God himselfe Yet farther I am wont to consider how my hart thought wil purpose or intent is laide open before him and how he seeth and knoweth my secrets better then my selfe Also how according to the pleasure of his diuine holy will he is able to doe alter establish and abolish all things and how life and death being and not being the saluation or damnation of the whole world is in his hands I farther meditate with my selfe how he is wholy and all good the chiefest highest purest goodnes it self which contēplating rightly I oft tremble in hart feare almost faint especially beholding my self so wicked so vile so abhominable and so filthy a sinner to presume to speake to a Lord of so great Majestie that he will admit me to come to him speake with him and eate with him as though I were vnited in great friendshippe with him Often doe I vse this or like speech to him What neede hast thou O my Lord and Master that such sinners as my selfe should present themselues before thee Is it seemely O my Lord that such vnworthy persons should presume to serue or attend on thee where is the honor and reuerence that is due to thy Princely Majesty DE. What answere do you receaue againe from him LOV. I cannot certaynely tell thee sauing that he makes me weepe for joy and sayeth Care not thou much for that let not this thing trouble thee consdering thou hast not of thy selfe procured this place nor intruded into it but art called to it and chosen by mee My selfe best knoweth why I haue placed thee in it Let thy only care be diligently to discharge thy office and with thy vttermost power to performe what thy duety bindeth thee to in the place thou art appointed and then take thou care for no other matter DE. What say you to him when you come before him accompanied with your associates Humility Feare and Reuerence LOVE c. First I dispatch those prayers and diuine seruice which this order of life my vowe and profession binde me to and that not sadly or vnwillingly or only for necessity but with as great attention deuotion diligence willingnes chearefulnes reuerence as I can And although I be bounde of necessity to such prayers Yet chaunge I may necessity into a redy will and most joyfully performe what I am bound to doe Then that I may craue something of him and may moue him to graunt it me I endeuour with all my power to prayse and laude him and cease not to honour him assuring my selfe that that is acceptable to him And in praysing him I desire his miraculous workes which he hath done pleasing and delighting my selfe in remembring them and exercise my selfe in telling his mighty power high wisdome and exceeding goodnes And farther I rehearce the great grace large bounties which he bestoweth on his souldiers and seruants honouring exalting him for the same Neither passe I in silence his exceeding great mercy which he euer hath and still doth shew towardes his enemies and am much amased at his gentlenesse and clemencie That not only he doth not reuenge himself on them but besides bestoweth great rewardes vppon them Besides I render great thankes to him for the great goodnes which is in himselfe and recyte and number his vertues and renowne his beauty wisdome exceeding goodnes praysing him for them and rejoycing and triumphing that he is so exceeding great and good And this doe I often knowing sufficiently his will herein and not doubting but that it is acceptable to him and that it is his pleasure that man should be conuersant with himselfe that is with God and conferre with him of pleasant
I haue conuersed sometime with the Loue of God who hath instructed me of all things that are necessary for me to doe Which I hope through Gods helpe to be able to execute But I cannot assure you making no doubt whether I am endued with the Loue of God or no considering it is a thing known only to him selfe who loue or doe not loue him Therefore herein I humble my selfe to his wisdome Neither can I assure you I haue any thing of my selfe one thing excepted which is Good will my dogge whome neither I dare presume to chalenge as my owne considering I haue him by the gifte of another These wordes of Desire pleased Desire of God the rather considering he perceaued that Desire durst not attribute to him self his loue of God DE. Now Sir let me craue to knowe your conditions office DESIRE Euen as a man through true knowledge of him selfe attayneth to great contempt and hatred of himselfe as through true knowledge of God a man likewise cōmeth to perfect loue of God So by much louing of God a man is brought to the greater desire of God And whosoeuer he be that getteth me he desireth nothing els that this world can yeeld For with such vertue and worthines doe I adorne his minde that he thinketh himselfe vnmeete to desire any thing besides that most excellent most rare most to be desired good Which is only our lord Iesus Christ I say I make him the most excellent of the world For although he be borne but of meane parentage yet do I make him a mighty King For whosoeuer is trulie endued with me he thinketh on nothing but only on God he speaketh nothing but only on God because that whersoeuer his treasure is there he setteth his hart And whatsoeuer the hart profoundly thinketh that especially the mouth vttereth And those thinges which are deliuered by the consent of the mouth apparantly declare the thought of the hart I am the foode and repast of that minde which liueth and is nourisned by good desire in this house of Charitie I am of highest dignity and keepe the dore of the secret chamber of the foresaid Charity and haue authority to admit such friendes as I allowe of Here vse I the office of a Cryer or a Trumpetter and walking about this Monastery make certaine cries and soundes vntill such time as I awake and stirre vp my Master and cause him to come forth to speake with such as seek him Who does thou thinke awaked me euen now when thou stoodest calling so long at the gate knockedst with the hammers of teares and sighes truly the barking of thy dog I am the truest messenger of Charitie come first to the gate speake first to my Mam nearest to him am soonest heard of him Farther it is in me to distribute the fruit of a most rare tree which we haue called the sight of God I do giue it to others to eate DE. Is this fruit plesant in tast For in the house of Humilitie an other fruit was giuen me most bitter to eate especially at the first it coulde hardly be swallowed DESIRE OF GOD. This fruit is most sweete yet far sweeter in the tast of some men then of others according as men are more desirous and hungry after it as they haue their tast mouthes most perfect Some there be whose teeth are but dul or blunt with whome this fruit agreeth not because they cannot hold it Other some eate it without hunger or appetite hauing their stomakes ful ouercharged with other meates to these men likewise it tasteth not pleasantly neither is it lightly disgested of them yet neuer thelesse it doth not hurt them Some others there be which by reason of some ague or some immoderate heate haue not their tast so good as others and these cannot judge the goodnes of this fruit but only according as they shall heare by others DE. I beseech you giue me leaue to tast a little of this fruit DESIRE OF GOD. It pleaseth me that thou sayest to tast a little thereof for in this mortall life no man may eate thereof his fill only he may tas and trie how sweete it is DE. Why so DESIRE OF GOD. If any man might enjoy it here to the full of his desire he would neuer desire to depart from this world and to goe to heauen Know therefore that liuing here in this value of misery almost dead through hunger and depriued of strength by reason of long penury we ought longly to watch and desire that day wherein we may enter into that great supper of our King and Master desiring and thirsting after him in no other manner then doth the hart thirst for the cleare fountaine in the hotest Sōmer And such is the vertue and force of this fruit that one little morsell be it neuer so small doth satiate a mans stomacke bee hee neuer so great an eater But being once come to the presence of this King and Master hee will make our stomacke better and stronger that wee shall bee able to eate of this fruit so much as we will and neuer receaue hurt or preiudice by it But here if any one eate more of it then his stomacke can beare he shall rather receaue hurt then good thereby Therefore must we moderately eate of this fruit vntill we arriue at that place of happines where for euer we shall be filled all measure with that same fruit which here we doe but only taste CHAPTER 11. How Desire of God prepared Desire to eate of this fruit DE. Now then Sir I beseech you bestowe vpon me to eate so much of this fruit as your selfe shall thinke good DESIRE OF GOD. First then considering this fruit is not conteyned but in a most cleane vessell it behooueth that thou clense and make cleane thy teeth and that thou wash thy mouth thy eyes thy face thyhandes and feete DE. Where may I finde water wherwith to do it DESIRE OF GOD. I will bring thee to a liuing fountayne that continually runneth both night and day called Holie Religion also I will assemble the Virgins of this Monastery who shall assist to wash and purifie thee This much contented Desire and gladly did he expect the comming of these Virgins when behould he sawe Desire of GOD come and bring them with him saying these be the Virgins that shall wash thee The first is called Sweetnes The second Concord The third Pitty or Compassion The fourth Grace The fift Clemencie The sixt Indulgence The seuenth Mercy The eight Beneuolence The ninth Gentlenes The tenth Sufferance The eleuenth Tranquility The twelfe Securitie The thirtenth Ior. The fourtenth Discretion or Moderation The fiftenth Deuotion Who will giue thee a certayne sawce that shall procure thee an appetite whereby more willingly pleasingly thou shalt eat this fruit For it is only giuen to such a hunger after it but others are sent away empty without it The sixtenth Virgin is
not haue thee ignorant of which peraduenture is vnknowne to thee That the greater comfort consolation I desire to send my friends with the more troules aduersities afflictions I vse tovisit them But if thou wilt leaue Good wil thy dogge herewith me he may continually remayne in my presence shal neuer goe from me except thou thy selfe wilt yet neuerthelesse daylie must thou commend him to mee DE. Why is it needeful that I commend him to thee daylie sufficeth it not that I doe it once OVR LORD No and not for feare least I should forget thee but lest thou thy selfe proue vnmindefull of me and that thou mayest haue occasion euer to remember and haue mee in thy minde whereby I may gratifie and rewarde thee daylie and according to thy necessity and want may helpe and succour thee For nothing it is to me whither thou be mindefull or vnmindefull of me DE. I yeeld thee most humble thankes my sweete Lord and Master Long since haue I proued thy goodnes and beneuolence for which thou workest all thinges in vs only for our saluation and benefit CHAPTER 15. How Desire put in practise the scure wordes of his Lord and Master and what benefit he receaued thereby THus Desire departing out of the chamber of his Lord and Master leauing his hart still behinde with him he found Desire of God without the dore expecting his comming to whome he said What hast thou done so long time within thinkest thou my Lord Master taketh delight is pleased with many wordes beleeue me thou shalt sometime preuaile more with him with one word then with a hundered DE. Me thinketh I haue stayed to short a time with him DE. OF GOD. Now viewe consider all this house considering thou art receaned in hither DE. I will goe to my chamber DE. OF GOD. Goe in the name of God Now Desire did daylie reuolue in his minde the foure wordes which his Lord Master had deliuered him oft would say to himselfe I Theu Seruant and King And whensoeuer hee spake them whither he deuided them or joyned them yet euer they agreed well togither For joyning the first which is I. With the third which is A Seruant he said to himself I pronounce them rightly For for the loue of my Lord master I am a seruant Then joyning the first with the last which is a King Sill he semed to pronounce them rightly For being the seruant of God he said he was a King For to serue God that is to raigne Againe speaking them an other way joyning King with Seruant Still they agreed well togither For the King of heauen to the intent he might make me a King made himselfe a Seruant and whosoeuer will be a King it is necessary that first he make himselfe a Seruant Thus did Desire for his benefit many wayes joyne these foure wordes togither For if at any time he were oppressed with any externall aduersity presently would he say to himselfe I nothing regard what men say or thinke of me not esteeming whither they honor or cōtenine me I am a seruant or bondman these things are meete for such an on If he felt himself to be tempted with any voluptuous pleasure then said he to himselfe Be it farre from me that am a King to become the salue of filthy vice and pleasure So vile a seruitude befitteth not my Nobility Thus receaued Desire exceeding benefits by these words whither he joyned them in order or placed them contrarily For both did they quēch naughty desires kindled in him appeased mitigated all his adjuersities But now cōsidering the explication of these words may be infinit least I seeme to be tedious I refer the rest to the good consideration of others FINIS AN APPENDIX GATHERED out of the worke of Ludouicus Blotius an Abbot conteyning briefely the chiefe matter of the former Dialogue Thirteene short Precepts most necessarie for all men that desire to attaine to the perfect loue of God The first FOr the loue of thy Sauiour Iesus Christ who suffered most bitter torments for thy redēption renounce and forsake all sensuall delights pleasures whensoeuer thou wouldest or desirest to heare see smell taste touch or speake any thing call to thy remembrance and thinke that thou art then to obey God and reason speaking in thee and not thy sensuall appetite which shall moue and stirre thee Be also ready and content to want the delightes of the spirit according to the pleasure and ordinance of God And whensoeuer thou art comforted with an inward sweetnes and consolation rest not therein but beware thou abuse it not according to thy owne proper pleasure 2. Keepe euer a most carefull watch ouer thy seeing hearing and ouer thy speaking that they decline not after vnlawfull vaine and vnprofitable thinges Thou must be most vigilant and warie in speaking that thou vtter not more wordes or in other manner then shal beseeme thee Let all thy talke be short plaine and voide of strife and contention Gouerne and order carefully all parts of thy body Auoide and shunne immoderate laughter and all leuitie and wantonnesse in thy behauiour 3. Loue not any creature with an inordinate affection but mortifie thy selfe to all transitory things and carry a minde free from such allurements for in such a freedome is conteyned the most true and pleasant life 4. Kill and destroy with all possible care through a full resignation and deniall of thy selfe all thy passions and finfull affections and especiall thy stubborne and obstinate self-will Loue only before all thinges the holie will of God and still wish that it may be done and to that wholy submit thy selfe in such sort that whatsoeuer God will haue done that same thou shalt desire also In all things and at all all times preferre the prayse honor of God before thy owne profit priuate commodity 5. In all thinges that shall happen wisely expect the prouidence of God carefully commit thy selfe and all thine to him Knowing that he hath a care ouer thee All aduersity and tribulation be it internall or externall take as sent from the hand of God Beleeuing for certayne that he doth sende it thee for thy farther benefit and good of thy soule Beare it therefore patiently euen to the last houre giuing thankes to God and continually praysing him through whose permission and ordinance such a thing is befalne thee And be not troubled or moued for any iniury that snall be offered to thee nor impatiently complaine thereof to any man but calling to remembrance thy owne iniquity and ingratitude hould thy selfe worthy of all men to be reprehended blamed contemned vexed scorned and trode on Why shouldest thou be dejected for the words of men or for any thing that thou canst suffer from them Giue men leaue to thinke speake their plesures of thee let the world and the Diuell rage as they will at thee considering it commeth but by Gods