doors otherwise threatning to break in But if those in the house knew their own Strength it were easie to keep them out Seeing the doors are Threatning Proof it is not the breath of their Oathes can blow the â—ocks open Yet silly Souls being affrighted they obey and betray themselves to their Violence Thus Satan serves me or rather thus I serve my self When I cannot be forced I am fool'd out of my Integrity He cannot Constrain if I do not Consent If I do but keep Possession all the Posse of Hell cannot violently eject me But I cowardly surrender to his Summons Thus there needs no more to my undoing but my self XVI Lord WHen I am to Travell I never use to provide my self till the very Tyme Partly out of Lazinesse loath to be troubled till needs I must partly out of Pride as presuming all necessaries for my Journey will wait upon me at the instant Some say this is Schollers fashion and it seemes by following it I hope to approve my self to be one However it often comes to passe that my Journey is finally stopt through the Narrownesse of the Time to provide for it Grant Lord that my confess'd Improvidence in Temporall may make me suspect my Providence in Spituall Matters * Salomon saith Man goeth to his long Home Short Preparation will not fit so long a Journey O! let me not put it off to the last to have my * Oile to buy when I am to burn it But let me so dispose of my self that when I am to dye I may have nothing to do but to dye XVII Lord WHen in any writing I have occasion to insert these passages God willing God lending me life c. I observe Lord that I can scarce hold my hand from incircling these words in a Parenthesis as if they were not Essentiall to the Sentence but may as well be left out as put in Whereas indeed they are not onely of the Commission at large but so of the Quorum that without them all the rest is nothing wherefore hereafter I will write those words fully and fairely without any Inclosure about them Let Criticks censure it for bad Grammer I am sure it is good Divinity XVIII Lord MAny temporall Matters which I have desired thou hast denyed me It vext me for the present that I wanted my will Since considering in cold blood I plainly perceive had that which I desired been done I had been undone Yea what thou gavest me instead of those things which I wished though lesse toothsome to me were more wholsome for me Forgive I pray my former Anger and now accept my humble thanks Lord grant me one suite which is this Deny me all suits which are bad for me when I Petition for what is unfitting O let the King of Heaven make use of his Negative Voice Rather let me fast then have * Quailes given with intent that I should be choaken in eating them XIX Lord THis day I disputed with my self whether or no I had said my Prayers this Morning And I could not call to mind any remarkable Passage whence I could certainly conclude that I had offered my Prayers unto thee Frozen Affections which left no Spark of Remembrance behind them Yet at last I hardly recovered one Token whence I was assured that I had said my Prayers It seems I had said them and onely said them rather by heart then with my heart Can I hope that thou wouldest Remember my Prayers when I had almost forgotten that I had prayed Or rather have I not Cause to fear that thou remembrest my Prayers too well to punish the Coldnesse and Badnesse of them Alas are not Devotions thus done in effect left undone Well * Iacob advised his Sonnes at their second going into Egypt Take double Money in your hand peradventure it was an Oversight So Lord I come with my second Morning Sacrifice Be pleased to accept it which I desire and endeavour to present with a little better Devotion then I did the former XX Lord THe motions of thy Holy Spirit were formerly frequent in my heart But alas of late they have been great Strangers It seems they did not like their last entertainment they are so loath to come again I fear they were * grieved that either I heard them not attentively or beleeved them not faithfully or practised them not Conscionably If they be pleased to come again this is all I dare promise that they do deserve and I do desire they should be well used Let thy holy Spirit be pleased not onely to stand before the door and * knock but also to come in If I do not open the door it were too unreasonable to request such a Miracle to come in when the doors were shut as thou did'st to the * Apostles Yet let me humbly beg of thee that thou wouldest make the Iron Gate of my heart open of it's own * accord Then let thy Spirit be pleased to sup in my heart I have given it an Invitation and I hope I shall give it room But O thou that sendest the Guest send the Meat also and if I be so unmannerly as not to make the holy Spirit Welcome O! let thy effectuall Grace make me to make it welcome XXI Lord I Confesse this Morning I remembred my Breakfast but forgot my Prayers And as I have returned no praise so thou mightest justly have afforded me no Protection Yet thou hast carefully kept me to the middle of this day and intrusted me with a new debt before I have paid the Old Score It is now Noon too late for a Morning too soon for an Evening Sacrifice My Corrupt Heart prompts me to put off my Prayers till night But I know it too well or rather too ill to trust it I fear if till night I deferre them at night I shall forget them Be pleased therefore now to accept them Lord let not a few hours the later make a breach Especially seeing be it spoken not to excuse my Negligence but to implore thy Pardon a thousand yeers in thy sight are but as yesterday I promise hereafter by thy Assistance to bring forth fruit in due Season See how I am ashamed the Sun should shine on me who now newly start in the Race of my Devotions when he like a Gyant hath run more then half his Course in the Heavens XXII Lord THis day casually I am fallen into a bad company know not how I came hither or how to get hence Sure I am not my Improvidence hath run me but thy Providence hath led me into this Danger I was not wandring in any base by-path but walking in the high way of my Vocation wherefore Lord thou that calledst me hither keep me here Stop their mouths that they speak no Blasphemy or stop my ears that I hear none or open my mouth soberly to reprove what I hear Give me to Guard my self but Lord Guard my Guarding
speaking of his own sicknesse he saith * We were pressed out of Measure above strength Perchance this will be expounded by propounding another Riddle of the same Apostles Who praising * Abraham saith that against hope he beleeved in hope That is against Carnall Hope he beleeved in Spirituall Hope So the same wedge will serve to cleave the former difficulty Paul was pressed above his Human not above his Heavenly Strength Grant Lord that I may not mangle and dismember thy Word but study it intirely comparing one Place with another For Diamonds onely can cut Diamonds and no such Comments on the Scripture as the Scripture VII Lord I Observe that the vulgar Translation reads the Apostles Precept thus * Give diligence to make your Calling and Election sure by Good Works But in our English Testaments these words by Good Works are left out It grieved me at the first to see our Translation defective but it offended me afterwards to see the other Redundant For those words are not in the Greek which is the Originall And it is an ill work to put Good Works in to the Corruption of the Scripture Grant Lord that though we leave Good Woorks out in the Text we may take them in in our Comment In that Exposition which our Practice is to make on this Precept in our Lives and Conversations VIII Lord I Find the Genealogie of my * Saviour strangely Chequered with four remarkable Changes in four immediate Generations 1 Rehoboham begat Abiam that is a bad Father begat a bad Son 2 Abiam begat Asa that is a bad Father a good Sonne 3 Asa begat Iehosaphat that is a good Father a good Sonne 4 Iehosaphat begat Ioram that is a good Father a bad Sonne I see Lord from hence that my Fathers Piety cannot be entailed that 's bad News for me But I see also that Actuall Impiety is not always hereditary that 's good News for my Sonne IX Lord WHen in my daily Service I read Davids Psalmes Give me to alter the Accent of my soul according to their severall Subjects In such Psalmes wherein he confesseth his Sinnes or requesteth thy Pardon or praiseth for former or prayeth for future favours in all these give me to raise my soul to as high a pitch as may be But when I come to such Psalms wherein he curseth his Enemies O there let me bring my soul down to a lower note For those words were made only to fit Davids mouth I have the like breath but not the same Spirit to pronounce them Nor let me flatter my self that it is lawfull for me with David to curse thine Enemies lest my deceitfull heart intitle all mine Enemies to be Thine and so what was Religion in David prove Malice in me whil'st I act Revenge under the Pretence of Piety X. Lord I Read of the two Witnesses * And when they shall have finished their Testimony the Beast that ascendeth out of the bottomlesse Pit shall make Warre against them and shall overcome them and kill them They could not be kil'd whil'st they were doing but when they had done their worke during their imployment they were invincible No better Armour against the darts of Death then to be busied in thy Service Why art thou so heavie O my soul No Malice of man can Antidate my end a Minute whil'st my maker hath any work for me to do And when all my daily task is ended why should I grudge then to go to Bed XI Lord I Read at the Transfiguration that * Peter Iames and Iohn were admitted to behold Christ but Andrew was excluded So again at the reviving of the daughter of the ruler of the * Synagogue these three were let in and Andrew shut out Lastly in the * Agony the aforesaid three were called to be witnesses thereof and still Andrew left behind Yet he was Peters Brother and a good man and an Apostle why did not Christ take the two pair of Brothers was it not pitty to part them But me thinks I seem more offended thereat then Andrew himself was whom I find to expresse no discontent being pleased to be accounted a loyall Subject for the generall though he was no favourite in these particulars Give me to be pleased in my self and thankfull to thee for what I am though I be not equall to others in personall perfections For such peculiar Priviledges are Courtesies from thee when given and no Injuries to us when denyed XII Lord Saint Paul teacheth the Art of heavenly thrift how to make a new Sermon of an Old Many * saith he walk of whom I have told you often and now tell you weeping that they are Enemies to the Crosse of Christ Formerly he had told it with his Tongue but now with his Tears formerly he taught it with his words but now with his weeping Thus new affections make an old Sermon new May I not by the same proportion make an old Prayer new Lord thus long I have offered my Prayer drye unto thee now Lord I offer it wet Then wilt thou own some new Addition therein when though the Sacrifice be the same yet the dressing of it is different being steep't in his Tears who bringeth it unto thee XIII Lord I Read of my Saviour That when he was in the wildernesse * then the Devill leaveth him and behold Angels came and Ministred unto him A great change in a little time No twilight betwixt night and day No Purgatory-condition betwixt Hell and Heaven but instantly when Out Devill In Angell Such is the Case of every solitary Soul It will make Company for it self A musing mind will not stand Neuter a Minute but presently side with Legions of good or bad thoughts Grant therefore that my soul which ever will have some may never have bad Company XIV Lord I Read how Cushi and Ahimaaz ran a Race who first should bring Tidings of Victory to David Ahimaaze though last setting forth came first to his Journeys end Not that he had the fleeter feet but the better brains to chuse the way of most advantage For the Text * saith So Ahimaaz ranne by the way of the Plain and over-went Cushi Prayers made to God by Saints fetch a needlesse compasse about That is but a rough and un-even way Besides one Steep Passage therein questionable whether it can be climbed up and Saints in Heaven made sensible of what we say on Earth The way of the plain or plain way both shortest surest is Call upon me in the time of Trouble Such Prayers though starting last will come first to the Mark XV Lord THis morning I read a Chapter in the Bible and therein observ'd a memorable Passage whereof I never took notice before Why now and no sooner did I see it Formerly my Eyes were as open and the Letters as Legible Is there not a thin Vaile laid over thy Word which is more rarified by Reading and at last wholly
worn away Or was it because I came with more appetite then before The Milk was alwayes there in the brest but the Child till now was not Hungry enough to find out the Teat I see the Oile of thy Word will never leave Increasing whil'st any bring an empty Barrell The Old Testament will still be a New Testament to him who comes with a fresh desire of Information XVI Lord AT the first * Passeover God kept touch with the Hebrews very Punctually At the end of the four hundred and thirty yeers in the self same day it came to passe that all the Hosts of the Lord went out of the Land of Egypt But at the first Easter God was better then his word Having promised that Christ should lye but three dayes in the Grave his Fatherly Affection did runne to relieve him By a Charitable Synechdoche two pieces of dayes were counted for whole ones God did cut the work short in * righteousnesse Thus the Measure of his Mercy under the Law was full but it ranne over in the Gospell XVII Lord THe * Apostle diswadeth the Hebrews from Covetousnesse with this Argument because God said I will not leave thee nor forsake thee Yet I find not that God ever gave this Promise to all the Jews but he spake it onely to * Ioshua when first made Commander against the Canaanites Which without violence to the Anallogie of faith the Apostle applyeth to all good men in generall Is it so that we are Heirs apparant to all promises made to thy Servants in Scripture Are the Charters of Grace granted to them good to me Then Will I say with Iacob * I have enough But because I cannot intitle my self to thy promises to them except I immitate their piety to thee Grant I may take as much Care in following the one as Comfort by applying the othâ—r XVIII Lord I Read that thou didst make * Grasse Hearbs Trees the third day As for the Sunne * Moon and Stars thou madest them on the fourth day of the Creation Thus at first thou didst confute the folly of such who maintain that all Vegetables in their growth are inslaved to a Necessary and unavoidable dependance on the Influences of the Starres Whereas Plants were even when Planets were not It is false that the Mary-gold follows the Sunne whereas rather the Sunne follows the Mary-gold as made the day before him Hereafter I will admire thee more and fear Astrologers lesse Not affrighted with their dolefull predictions of Dearth and Drowth collected from the Complexions of the Planets Must the Earth of Necessity be Sad because some ill-natured Starre is Sullen as if the Grasse Could not grow without asking it leave Whereas thy power which made Hearbs before the Starres can preserve them without their propitions yea against their Malignant Aspects XIX Lord I Read how Paul writing from Rome spake to * Philemon to prepare him a lodging hoping to make use thereof yet we find not that he ever did use it being Martyred not long after However he was no loser whom thou didst lodge in a higher Mansion in Heaven Let me alwayes be thus deceived to my Advantage I shall have no Cause to Complain though I never wear the new Cloaths fitted for me if before I put them on death cloath me with Glorious Immortality XX Lord WHen our Saviour sent his Apostles abroad to Preach he enjoyned them in one * Gospell Possesse nothing neither Shooes nor a staffe But it is said in another * Gospell And he commanded them that they should take nothing for their Iourney save a Staffe onely The Reconciliation is easie They might have a Staffe to speak them Travellours not Souldiers One to walk with not to Warre with a Staffe which was a Wand not a Weapon But Oh! In how dolefull dayes do we live wherein Ministers are not as formerly arm'd with their Nakednesse but need Staves and Swords too to defend them from violence XXI Lord I Discover an arrant Lazinesse in my Soul For when I am to read a Chapter in thy Bible before I begin it I look where it endeth And if it endeth not on the same side I cannot keep my hands from turning over the leaf to measure the length thereof on the other side If it swels to many Verses I begin to grudge Surely my heart is not rightly affected Were I truly hungry after heavenly Food I would not Complain of the greatest Messe of Meat Scourge Lord this Lazinesse out of my Soul make the reading of thy Word not a Penance but a Pleasure unto me Teach me that as amongst many heaps of Gold all being equally pure that is the best which is the biggest so I may esteem that Chapter in thy Word the best that is the Longest XXII Lord I Find David making a Syllogisme in Mode and Figure Two Propositions he perfected * 18 If I regard Wickednesse in my heart the Lord will not hear me 19 But verily God hath heard me he hath attended to the voice of my Prayer Now I expected that David should have Concluded thus Therefore I regard not wickednesse in my heart But farre otherwise he Concludes 20 Blessed be God who hath not turned away my Prayer nor his Mercy from me Thus David hath deceived but not wronged me I look't that he should have clapt the Crown on his own and he puts it on Gods Head I will learn this Excellent Logick For I like Davids better then Aristotles Syllogismes That whatsoever the Premisses be I make Gods Glory the Conclusion XXIII Lord WIse * Agur made it his wish Give me not poverty lest I steal take the Name of my God in vain He saith not Lest I steal and be caught in the manner and then be stockt or whipt or branded or forc'd to four fold Restitution or put to any other shamefull or painfull punishment But he saith lest I steal and take the name of my God in vain That is lest professing to serve thee I confute a good Profession with a Bad Conversation Thus thy Children count Sinne to be the greatest Smart in Sin as being more sensible of the wound they therein give to the glory of God then of all the Stripes that man may lay upon them for punishment XXIV Lord I Read that when my Saviour dispossessed the Mans * Sonne of a Devill he enjoyned the Evil Spirit to come out of him and enter no more into him But I find that when my Saviour himself was tempted of * Satan the Devill departed from him but for a Sason Retreating as it seemes with mind to return How came it to passe Lord that he who expell'd him finally out of others did not propell him so from himself Sure it doth not follow that because he did not he could not do it Or that he was lesse able to help himself because he was more Charitable to relieve others No I see
are not able to satisfie VIII IN the dayes of King * Edward the sixt the L. Protector march't with a Powerfull Army into Scotland to demand their young Queen Mary in Marriage to our King according to their Promises The Scotch refusing to do it were beaten by the English in Muslâ—borough fight One demanded of a Scotch Lord taken Prisoner in the Battell Now Sir how do you like our Kings Marriage with your Queen I alwayes quoth he did like the Marriage But I do not like the wooing that you should fetch a Bride with Fire and Sword It is not enough for men to propound Pious Projâ—cts to themselves if they go about by indirect Courses to compasse them Gods own Work must be done by Gods own wayes Otherwise we can take no Comfort in obtaining the end if we cannot justifie the means used thereunto IX A Sagamore or petty King in Virginia guessing the Greatnesse of other Kings by his own sent a Native hither who understood English Commanding him to score upon a Long Cane given him of Purpose to be his Register the number of English men that thereby his Master might know the strength of this our Nation Landing at Plimouth a Populous Place and which he mistook for all England he had no leisure to eat for notching up the men he met At Exeter the difficulty of his Task was increased Coming at last to London that Forest of People he brake his Cane in Pieces perceiving the impossibility of his imployment Some may conceive that they can reckon up the Sinnes they commit in one day Perchance they may make hard Shifts to Summe up their notorious ill deeds More difficult it is to score up their wicked words But O how infinite are their idle thoughts High Time then to leave off counting and cry out with * David Who can tell how oft he offendeth Lord cleanse me from my secret sinnes X. MArtin de Golin * Master of the Teutonick Order was taken Prisoner by the Prusians and delivered bound to be beheaded But he perswaded his Executioner who had him alone first to take off his Costly Cloaths which otherwise would be spoil'd with the sprinckling of his Blood Now the Prisoner being partly unbound to be uncloath'd and finding his Arms somewhat loos'ned strake the Executioner to the Ground kil'd him afterwards with his own sword and so regained both his life and Liberty * Christ hath Overcome the World and delivered it to Us to destroy it But we are all Achans by Nature and the Babylonish Garment is a Bait for our Covetousnesse Whil'st therefore we seek to take the Plunder of this World's Wardrobe we let go the Mastery we had formerly of it And too often that which Christ's Passion made our Captive our Folly makes our Conquerour XI I Read how Pope * Pius the fourth had a great Ship richly Loaden Landded at Sandwich in Kent where it suddenly sunck and so with the Sands choaked up the Harbour that ever since that place hath been deprived of the benefit thereof I see that happinesse doth not alwayes attend the Adventures of his Holinesse Would he had carried away his Ship and left us our Harbour May his Spirituall Merchandize never come more into this Island But rather sinck in Tiber then Saile thus farre bringing so small Good and so great Annoyance Sure he is not so happy in opening the doors of Heaven as he is unhappy to obstruct Havens on Earth XII IEffery Arch-Bishop of York and base Son to King Henry the second used proudly to protest by his faith and the Royalty of the King his Father To whom one said You may sometimes Sir as well remember what was the honesty of your Mother Good men when puffed up with Pride for their heavenly Extraction and Paternall descent how they are Gods Sonnes by Adoption may seasonably call to mind the Corruption which they carry about them * I have said to the worm thou art my Mother And this Consideration will temper their Soules with humility XIII I Could both Sigh and Smile at the Simplicity of a Native American sent by a Spaniard his Master with a Basket of Figgs and a Letter wherein the Figgs were mentioned to carry them both to one of his Masters friends By the way this Messenger eat up the Figgs but delivered the Letter whereby his deed was discovered and he soundly punished Being sent a Second Time on the like Message he first took the Letter which he conceived had Eyes as well as a Tongue and hid it in the Ground sitting himself on the place where he put it and then securely fell to feed on his Figgs presuming that that Paper which saw nothing could tell nothing Then taking it again out of the ground he delivered it to his Masters Friend whereby his fault was perceiv'd and he worse beaten then before Men Conceive they can manage their sinnes with Secresie But they carry about them a Letter or Book rather written by Gods Finger their * Conscience bearing witnesse to all their Actions But sinners being often detected and accused hereby grow wary at last and to prevent this speaking Paper for telling any Tales do Smother Stifle and Suppresse it when they go about the Committing of any Wickednesse Yet Conscience though buried for a time in Silence hath afterwards a Resurrection and discovers all to their greater Shame and heavier Punishment XIV IOhn Courcy Earl of Vlster in Ireland endeavoured fifteen severall Times to saile over thither and so often was beaten back again with bad Weather At last he expostulated his Case with God in a * Vision Complaining of hard Measure That having built and repaired so many Monasteries to God and his Saints he should have so bad successe It was answered him That this was but his just Punishment because he had formerly put out the Image of the * Trinity out of the Cathedrall Church of Down and placed the picture of Saint Patrick in the room thereof Surely God will not hold them Guiltlesse who justle him out of his Temple and give to Saints that Adoration due alone to his divine Majesty XV THe Lybians kept all Woemen in Common But when a Child was born they used to send it to that Man to maintain as Father thereof whom the Infant most resembled in his Complexion Satan and my sinfull Nature enter-Common in my soul in the causing of Wicked Thoughts The Sonnes by their Faces speak their Syres Proud Wanton Covetous Envious Idle thoughts I must own to come from my self God forgive me it is vain to deny it those Children are so like to their Father But as for some hideous horrible Thoughts such as I start at the Motion of them being out of the Road of my Corruption and yet which way will not that wander So that they smell of Hells Brimstone about them These fall to Satans lot to Father them The Swarthy Blacknesse of their Complexion
with much Mirth in a Moment But O that they would but seriously consider with themselves how many their offences are and sadly fall a counting them And if so hard truly to summe their sinnes sure harder sincerely to sorrow for them If to get their number be so difficult what is it to get their Pardon XXIV I Know the Village in Cambridge-shire * wherein there was a Crosse full of Imagery Some of the Images were such as that People not foolishly factious but judiciously conscientious took just exception at them Hard by the Youths of the Town erected a May-pole and to make it of Proof against any that should endeavour to cut it down they armed it with Iron as high as any could reach A violent Wind happened to blow it down which falling on the Crosse dashed it to pieces It is possible what is Counted Prophanesse may accidentally correct Superstition But I could heartily wish that all pretenders to Reformation would first labour to be good themselves before they go about the amending of Others XXV I Read that Aegaeus the Father of * Theseus hid a Sword a paire of Shooes under a great Stone And left word with his wife whom he left with Child that when the Sonne she should bear was able to take up that Stone weild that Sword and wear those Shooes then she should send him to him For by these Signes he would own him for his own Sonne Christ hath left in the Custody of the Church our Mother the Sword of the Spirit and the Shooes of a Christian Conversation the same which he once wore himself and they must fit our Feet yea and we must take up the weight of many heavy Crosses before we can come at them But when we shall appear before our Heavenly Father bringing these Tokens with us then and not before he will acknowledge us to be no Bastards but his True-born Children MIXT Contemplations I. WHen I look on a Leaden Bullet therein I can read both Gods Mercy and Mans Malice Gods Mercy whose Providence foreseeing that men of Lead would make Instruments of Cruelty didst give that mettall a Medicinall Vertue As it hurts so it also heals and a Bullet sent in by mans Hatred into a fleshly and no Vitall Part will with ordinary Care and Curing out of a naturall Charity work it's own way out But Oh! how devillish were those men who to frustrate and defeat his Goodnesse and to Countermand the healing power of Lead first found the Champing and Impoysoning of Bullets Fools who accompt themselves honoured with the shamefull Title of being the Inventors of Evill * Things indeavouring to Out-infinite Gods Kindnesse with their Cruelty II. I Have heard some Men rather causelessely Captious then judiciously Criticall cavil at Grammarians for calling some Conjunctions Disjunctive as if this were a flat Contradiction Whereas indeed the same Particle may conjoyn words and yet disjoyn the sence But alas how sad is the present condition of Christians who have a Communion disuniting The Lords Supper ordained by our Saviour to conjoyn our Affections hath disjoyned our Judgements Yea it is to be feared lest our long quarrels about the manner of his Presence cause the matter of his Absence for our want of Charity to receive him III. I Have observed that Children when they first put on new Shooes are very curious to keep them clean Scarce will they set their foot on the Ground for fear to dirty the Soles of their Shooes Yea rather they will wipe the Leather clean with their Coats and yet perchance the next day they will trample with the same Shooes in the Mire up to the Anckles Alas Childrens play is our Earnest On that day wherein we receive the Sacrament we are often over-precize scrupling to say or do those things which lawfully we may But we who are more then Curious that day are not so much as Carefull the next And too often what shall I say go on in sinne up to the Anckles yea our sins go * over our Heads IV. I Know some Men very desirous to see the Devill because they conceive such an Apparition would be a Confirmation of their Faith For then by the Logick of Opposites they will conclude There is a God because there is a Devill Thus they will not believe there is a Heaven except Hell it self be deposed for a Witnesse thereof Surely such mens Wishes are vain and Hearts are wicked For if they will not believe having Moses and the Prophets and the Apostles they will not believe no if the Devill from Hell appears unto them Such Apparitions were never ordained by God as the means of Faith Besides Satan will never shew Himself but to his own advantage If as A Devill to fright them If as an Angell of light to flatter them how ever to hurt them For my part I never desire to see him And O! if it were possible that I might never feel him in his motions and Temptations I say let me never see him till the day of Judgement where he shall stand Arreigned at the Barre and Gods Majesty sit Judge on the Bench ready to condemn him V. I Observe that Antiquaries such as prize Skill above Profit as being rather Curious then Covetous do preferre the Brasse Coyns of the Roman Emperours before those in Gold and Silver Because there is much falsenesse and forgery daily detected and more suspected in Gold and Silver Meddals as being commonly cast and Counterfeited Whereas Brasse Coyns are presumed upon as true and antient because it will not quit cost for any to Counterfeit them Plain dealing Lord what I want in Wealth may I have in sincerity I care not how mean Mettall my Estate be of if my Soul have the true Stamp really impressed with the unfeigned Image of the King of Heaven VI LOoking on the Chappell of King Henry the seventh in Westminster God grant I may once again see it with the Saint who belongs to it Our Soveraign there in a wel conditioned Peace I say looking on the outside of the Chappell I have much admired the Curious Workmanship thereof It added to the Wonder that it is so shaddowed with mean Houses well nigh on all sides that one may almost touch it as soon as see it Such a Structure needed no Bace Buildings about it as foiles to set it off Rather this Chappell may passe for the Embleme of a great Worth living in a private way How is he pleased with his own Obscurity whil'st others of lesse desert make greater Shew And whil'st Proud People stretch out their Plumes in Oâ—tentation he useth their Vanity for his Shelter more pleased to have worth then to hâ—ve others take Notice of it VII THe Mariners at Sea count it the sweetest perfume when the Water in the Keel of their Ship doth stinke For hence they conclude that it is but little and long since I ak't in But it is wofull with them when the Water
Satan no News which he knew not before Surely I have not managed my Secret Sinnes with such privacy but that he from some Circumstances collected what they were Though the fire was within he saw some smoake without Wherefore for the future I am resolved to Acknowledge my darling faults though alone yet aloud That the Devill who rejoyced in partly knowing of my Sins may be grieved more by hearing the Expression of my Sorrow As for any advantage he may make from my Confession this Comforts me Gods Goodnesse in Assisting me will be above Satans Malice in Assaulting me XVIII IN the mid'st of my Morning Prayers I had a good Meditation which since I have forgotten Thus much I remember of it that it was pious in it self but not proper for that time For it took much from my Devotion and added nothing to my Instruction and my soul not able to intend two things at once abated of it's fervency in Praying Thus snatching at two Imployments I held neither well Sure this Meditation came not from him who is the God of Order He useth to fasten all his Nailes and not to drive out one with another If the same Meditation return again when I have leisure and room to receive it I will say it is of his sending who so mustereth and marshalleth all good Actions that like the Souldiers in his Army mentioned in the * Prophet They shall not thrust one another they shall walk every one in his own Path. XIX WHen I go speedily in any Action Lord give me to call my soul to an account It is a shrewd Suspition that my Bowle runnes down-hill because it runnes so fast And Lord when I go in an unlawfull way start some Rubbs to stop me let my Foot slip or stumble And give me the Grace to understand the Language of the Lets thou throwest in my way Thou hast promised * I will hedge up thy way Lord be pleased to make the hedge high enough and thick enough that if I be so mad as to adventure to climbe over it I may not onely soundly rake my cloaths but rend my Flesh yea let me rather be caught and stick in the Hedge then breaking in thorow it fall on the other side into the deep Ditch of eternall Damnation XX COming hastily into a Chamber I had almost thrown down a Christall Hour-Glasse Fear lest I had made me grieve as if I had broken it But alas how much pretious Time have I cast away without any Regret The Hour-Glasse was but Christall each Hour a Pearl that but like to be broken this lost outright That but casually this done wilfully A better Hour-Glasse might be bought But Time lost once lost ever Thus we grieve more for Toyes then for Treasure Lord give me an Hour-Glasse not to be by me but to be in me Teach me to Number my * dayes An Hour-Glasse to turn Me That I may apply my heart unto Wisdom XXI WHen a Child I loved to look on the Pictures in the Book of Martyrs I thought that there the Martyres at the Stake seemed like the three Children in the fiery * Fournace Ever since I had known them there not one hair more of their Head was burnt nor any smell of the fire singeing of their Cloaths This made me think Martyrdom was nothing But O though the Lion be painted fiercer then he is the fire is farre fiercer then it is painted Thus it is easie for one to endure an affliction as hee limnes it out in his own fancie and represents it to himself but in a bare Speculation But when it is brought indeed and laied home to us there must be the Man yea there must be more then the Man yea there must be God to assist the Man to undergo it XXII TRavelling on the Plain which notwithstanding hath its Risings and Fallings I discovered Salisbury Steeple many miles off Coming to a declivity I lost the sight thereof But climbing up the next Hill the Steeple grew out of the Ground again Yea I often found it and lost it till at last I came safely to it and took my lodging neer it It fareth thus with us whilst we are way-fairing to heaven mounted on the * Pisgat Top of some good Meditation we get a glimps of our Celestiall Canaan But when either on the Flat of an Ordinary Temper or in the Fall of an Extraordinary Temptation we lose the view thereof Thus in the sight of our Soul Heaven is discovered covered recovered till though late at last though slowly surely we arrive at the Haven of our Happinesse XXIII Lord I Find my self in the Latitude of a Feaver I am neither well nor ill Not so well that I have any mind to be merry with my Friends nor so ill that my Friends have any cause to Condole with me I am a Probationer in point of my health As I shall behave my self so I may be either expelled out of it or admitted into it Lord let my distemper stop here go on further Shoot not thy Murthering Pieces against that Clay-Castle which surrendreth it self at thy first Summons O spare me a little that I may recover my strength I begge not to be forgiven but to be forborn my Debt to Nature And I onely do crave time for a while till I be better fitted and furnished to pay it XXIV IT seemed strange to me when I was told That Aqua-vitae which restores life to others should it self be made of the droppings of Dead Beer And that Strong-waters should be extracted out of the Dreggs almost of small Beer Surely many other excellent Ingredients must concurre and much Art must be used in the Distillation Despair not then O my Soul No Extraction is Impossible where the Chymist is Infinite He that is All in all can produce any thing out of any thing And he can make my Soul which by Nature is setled on his * Lees and Dead in Sinne to be quickned by the Infusion of his Grace and purified into a pious Disposition XXV Lord HOw easie is Pen and Paper-Piety for one to write Religiously I will not say it costeth nothing bâ—t it is farre cheaper to work one's Head then ones Heart to Goodnesse Some perchance may guesse me to be good by my writings and so I shall Deceive my Reader But if I do not desire to be good I most of all deceive my self I can make an hundred Meditations sooner then subdue the least sinne in my soul Yea I was once in the mind never to write more For fear lest my writings at the last day prove Records against me And yet why should I not write that by Reading my own Book the Disproportion betwixt my lines and my life may make me blush my self if not into goodnesse into lesse badnesse then I would do otherwise That so my Writings may Condemne me and make me to Condemne my self that so God may be moved to acquit me FINIS * 1 Cor. 9.7 * Iames 3 6. * Isaiah 38.14 * Psal. 47. * Ephes. 5.19 * Ioh. 21.13 * Dan. 2.33 * Psal. 95.7 * Num. 11.26 * Num. 11.28 * Ruth 4.16 * Prov. 30.15 * Eccles. 12.5 * Mat. 25.10 * Num. 11.33 * Gen. 43.12 * Ephes. 4 3. * Revel. 3.20 * Ioh. 20.19 * Acts 12.10 * Gen. 7.2 * Iudges 20.16 Matth. 13.8 * Matth. 25.18 * Luke 19.20 * Matth. 25.2 * Psal. 2.8 * Gen. 28 22. * Gen. 33 19. * Gen. 35 1. * Iohn 18.16 * 1 Cor. 10.13 * 2 Cor. 1 8. * Rom. 4.18 * 2 Pet. 1 10. * Matth. 1.7 8. * Rev. 11 7. * Matth. 17.1 * Mark 5.37 * Mark 14.33 * Phil. 3.18 * Matth. 4.11 * 2 Sam. 18.23 * Exod. 12.41 * Rom. 9.28 * Heb. 13 5. * Iosh. 1.5 * Gen. 45 28. * Gen. 1.12 * Gen. 1.16 * Philemon verse 22. * Matth. 10.10 * Mark 6.8 * Psal. 66. * Pro. 30 9. * Mark 9.25 * Luke 4.13 * 2 Tim. 3.8 * Exod. 7.12 * M. Varro Solinus Plinius halicar. c. * Ephes. 5.16 * Giraldus Cambrensis Cambder in the description of thâ—t shire * Plutarch in Iul. Caesar * Sir Iohn Heywood in the life of Edward the 6. * Psal. 19.12 * Munsters Cosmography 3. Book Page 878 * Iohn 16 33. * Cambden Brit in Kent Gualterus Mappaeus de nugis Curialium * Iob. 17.14 * Rom. 2.15 * Annales Hybernici in Anno 1204. Cambdens Britt pag. 797. * Lawfully I presume to apply a Popish Vision to confute a Popish Practice * Livie libro Sexto Cap. 20. * Isai. 5.2 * Annales Hybernici in Anno 1204. Cambdens Britt pag. 797. * Eccles. 10.11 * Plutarch in the life of Alex. the Great * Iustin. lib. 18. Pag. 196. * â—om 1.20 * Cotenham * Plutarch in Theseo * Rom. 1.30 * Psal. 28.4 * 1 Pet. 4.12 * Matt. 6 3. * Ioel 2.8 * Hosea 2.6 * Psal. 90.12 * Dan. 3.27 * Deut. 34.1 * Zeph. 1.12