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A30555 A true description of my manner of life of what I have been in my profession of religion, and what I am at present, by the grace of God / this was given forth some time before that faithful servant of God laid down his body, who was known amongst many, by the name of Edward Burrough. Burrough, Edward, 1634-1662. 1663 (1663) Wing B6045; ESTC R12785 6,387 11

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upon which I fed for many dayes And then Pride grew more than ever and Self-conceitedness and Presumption and Fleshly liberty to the Carnal mind And my delight was much in Discoursing and Talking of the Mysteries of God where I spent that which God had given me like the Prodigal and gave Holy Things to Dogs for I wanted the true Wisdom of the Heir of the Kingdom And here I lived Pleasantly for I had the Knowledge of the Mystery of Christ in my Comprehension and the Mystery of the Kingdom as I thought was Revealed for I comprehended much in my Wisdom being unsetled in the Light which should have guided me into the Cross But the World was set in my Heart and Pride and Covetousness and the Earthly Spirit ruled and my Delight grew up again from the Simplicity I once had growing in the Knowledge out of the Innocency Here I ran from my Husband after other Lovers and had left the Lord my Maker and I spent the Portion of the Gift of God as among Harlots and Iniquity and Sin encreased again and Death by Sin came upon me and the Serpent beguiled me as he did Eve even when I was Innocent and I had Eaten of the Knowledge and not of the Life and that fed a part within me which should have been Famished and my Left hand knew what my Right hand did the Woman usurped power over the Man-child in me And in this condition for many dayes I travelled and became darkned in my Mind more and more and had lost that which once I had Felt and Known and had but in my earthly Memory the sence which before I had in the true Light and in a Measure enjoyed I could tell of Experiences but they were Dead to me and could speak of many Divine things in my Imaginations but I held the Truth in an unrighteous mind Then the Witness of God began again to work in me and brought me to Question some things how it was with me and I saw my self to be Ignorant more then formerly and I felt Peace and Joy departed from me and somthing desired to be restored again to my former condition but I grew to be much given to the love and delights of Riches and Honour in the World I fed my self with that Knowledge which formerly I had received in the Light and with a Deceitful mind could say I once had the Love of God and whom he Loved once he loves for ever But then that was head and ruled in me which he Loves never And I was Wanton and in Ishmaels Birth which I thought to be a goodly Child and would fancy he might have lived before the Lord and in my Vanities amongst Heathens I crucified the Lord of Life but the Blood of that which I had slain cryed continually and the Witness which lay slain gave me no rest which the Earthly man made Merry over for a time till the Lord was awakned as one out of sleep to lay again his Judgments upon me and then I grew weary of all Knowledge and Profession though never so High Something which shined deep in me shewed me Ignorance in the Highest of Words and I was tossed up and down in my Thoughts having lost the savour of Life which once I had tasted of that Tenderness which was once upon my Spirit And I was as a Drie Bone strewed abroad and I became a Reproach to my self who once had felt the Working of the Power of God but was now past Sence and might sit down in Darkness and look no more after Religion And this was partly my Resolution seeing my self Deceived in all Things But in due time the Lord Awakned me and brought me Home and sent the true and faithful Messenger the First-brought-forth of many Children not known to the World for whom the Nations shall Bless the Lord and the Message of Eternal Light he declared and spake the Language I knew not notwithstanding all my High talkings for it was Higher and yet Lower then I understood and it comprehended me and overthrew me in the height of my Knowledge And the Lord spake to me by Him and caused me to hear his Voyce through Him and my dim Eye was restored to Sight and my Understanding was Opened and the Vail was Rent and I saw my self as in a Glass to be in the Prodigal state and above the Cross and without Judgement and without the Fear of the Lord for my professed Freedom was proved Bondage in the ballance of Equity and my own Will had Power over me and my own Heart led me Captive And the Witness being Raised I saw my self Where I was and What I had been doing I saw I had been making an Image to the first Beast which had a Wound by the Sword and did Live whose Deadly Wound was again Healed and was Worshipping the Image which I had set Up even he Likeness of the first Beast And I was full of Airy Notions and Imaginations and the Son of the Bond-woman lived and I saw that Harlots gone from God had been my Companions And I confessed I was not worthy to be called a Son who had departed from the Fathers House and was found Feeding upon Husks and could not fill my Belly then Trouble and Distress come upon me and the Lord appeared a swift Witness against me and true Judgement was set up in my Heart and dayes of Sorrow compassed me about such as was not since the begining of the World and I was at my Wits end and a day of thick Darkness and Trouble a day of Weeping and Mourning and Misery a day of Recompence and Vengeance came upon me such as I had never known even for many days I was compassed with Pain as a Travelling Woman one Vial of Wrath after another was poured out and the Great Whore was to be Judged and to Drink of the Wine of the Wrath of God which had once made me to Drink of the Wine of her Fornication and Abominations my Pleasant day was turned into Mourning and my Merry Hours into Weeping the Earth was with its Glory consumed away and the Children of my Vanity fainted for Thirst and I became a Reproach to the Wicked round about me and was some time as a Distracted man when the Terrour of the Lord was upon me And it was hard to find Patience in that Day and to endure this Wounded Spirit My Sins were set in Order before my Face and they Reviewed by the Law of God set up in me and then I submitted my Neck to the Yoak and separated my Heart from all the Glory of the World and from all my Acquaintance and sought out the Fear of the Lord and his Judgements my Soul loved And I gave my Heart to seek the Lord and I Prized his Treasure above All things and my Heart found Favour in the sight of God as I became Subject to Him And I betook my self to a poor Despised Contemptible People called
Quakers and the Lord Raised us up about this time and now the Lord hath Made up the Breach and Healed up the Wound and Restored ever lasting Praise and Rest in my Soul and she hath found her Beloved whom from the dayes of my Child-hood I sought with a desire to know his Wayes and now I am one in the Generation of the Righteous Seed which was ever Hated by the Seed of Evil Doers But I had rather have chosen Affliction with Them than to enjoy the Pleasures of Sin with the Multitude And now do I bear Witness unto the Lord in this his Day unto the one Eternal Truth as it is in Christ Jesus of whom I am made a Partaker through the Faith of the Gospel by the Word of God and do set to my Seal That the Lord is True and his Wayes and Judgements are Equal whereby he Redeems Sion and her Children And a Witness for the Lord I bear by his Spirit against all the Deceitful Professions of the World which stands in the Wisdom of Man and not in the Power of God and from the Head of the great Image unto the Feet his whole Body in the Light is seen and comprehended and all deceivableness of Unrighteousness is seen in its Working And unto the pure Teachings of God in the Spirit do I give Testimony and against all the False Teachers and Hirelings in the World by whom the People are not Profited And in a Measure I have received the end of the Ministry of Christ and do not thereby Destroy it but Seal to it and am come into the Covenant of Peace where every one from the Least to the Greatest know the Lord and are established in Righteousness And what we have Heard Seen and Tasted of the Word of Life that do we Declare and stand Witness for God as we have Received the Truth in which we are made Free by the Son and do Suffer and are giving up to Bear the Sufferings for the Seeds sake which is not of this World Unto which Seed in us God hath fulfilled his Promises and his Word and hath removed the Enmity and taken away his Punishing Hand and the Fearfulness of his Countenance is changed into Love Life and Peace and Sorrow and Mourning is fled away and the Man-child is brought forth and the Remembrance of our former Trouble is now past And unto Him who is not known in the World though a Sufferer by it do I bear Witness in the sight of God Angels and Men and Wo unto his Persecutors they shall Fall and never more Rise again and Sorrow and Confusion shall fill their Loynes and the end of his Enemies shall be accursed in deep Misery and the Snares of the Enemy laid for him shall hold fast their own Feet Now I am Despised of the World and cast aside of my Relations and am not Greater than my Lord who was called a Blasphemer and Deceiver as now I am Praised be the Lord for Evermore who hath Separated me from the World and Worldly Glory and hath made me a Partaker of his Love in which my Soul hath full Satisfaction Joy and Content and now my Habitation is in the Lord. And thus I have Travelled through the World even to the End and now am come to the Beginning of that which never shall have an End which the Dark mind of Man knows not And this hath been my Travel many a day in Weariness and in a Burthened Spirit and though tossed too and fro yet now I have found a sure Resting Place even the beautiful Gates of Sion and my Mind is staied and my Soul Resteth in the Enjoyment of Love and a sure Defence is upon my Glory my Neighbours may Rejoyce with me for ever Edward Burrough THE END