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A28900
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A gold chain of directions, with twenty gold-linkes of love, to preserve love firm between husband and wife during their lives ... by Immanuel Bourne ...
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Bourne, Immanuel, 1590-1672.
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1669
(1669)
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Wing B3853; ESTC R846
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36,985
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212
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A Gold Chain OF Directions WITH Twenty Gold-Linkes of Love to preserve Love firm between Husband and Wife during their Lives Profitable for all that are already Married or that intend to take the Honourable and Holy estate of Marriage upon them hereafter Advising for a Right Choice in Marriage and how to keep from those sad Consequences have fallen out in too many Families sometimes upon small dislike between Husband and Wife That happiness may be the Inheritance of Parents and Posterities through the Grace of God in Christ Jesus Let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself and the wife see that she reverence her husband Ep. 5.33 By Immanuel Bourne a Minister of Christ Jesus our blessed Lord and Saviour London Printed by J. Streater for George Sawbridge dwelling on Clerken-well Green 1669. To the Right Honourable and Noble Lord John Lord Roos the only Son and Heir And to the Right Noble young Ladies the Lady Dorothy Lady Elizabeth Lady Anne and Lady Mary Mannors the eminently virtuous Daughters of the Right Honourable and truly Noble Lord John Earl of Rutland and of the Right Noble Lady the Lady Frances the worthily honoured Countesse of Rutland and my most free and noble Patron and Patronesse and to the rest of their honourable Family and Relations All health and happiness with true content and honour unto you all and to your Noble Parents and their Posterity in this life and eternal glory and blessedness in and by the Lord Jesus Christ in the life to come RIght Noble and my much honoured Lord It is too apparent that if this or the like spiritual Gold Chain of Directions for the happy Choice and enjoyment of a virtuous good Wife and Husband and the Declaration of their mutual Duties to each other had been better known unto and observed after your Marriage by your late so nobly born Lady and no doubt adorned with a noble and honourable Education by her honourable and truly Noble Parents in her younger dayes the too publick and to be lamented Breach between your Honours might by God's blessing have been saved Now to prevent the like disagreement if God in his most wise Providence shall grant you a second Marriage-Union I have made bold and thought good humbly to present these twenty heavenly Gold-links of Love as so many Scripture-Rules of Direction to your Honours your Noble Ladies Reading Meditation and Practice Pray daily to God for your future Happiness and Contentment both in your Choice and Enjoyment to the end of your life And for you ever to be honoured Ladies what can your desires be more or better for this present life then to live happily in a single estate whilest the most wise God seeth it best for you so to continue And to live joyfully with honourable and truly Noble faithful kind and loving Husbands when the same most gracious God shall call you to the high and honourable estate of Marriage The first God hath blessed you with already living with your tender loving and ever to be honoured Parents providently taking care for your noble and virtuous Education with all things necessary for your present Contentment And for the second that you may be blessed in your right Choice and happy enjoyment of truly Noble Religious Faithful and Loving kind Husbands I have exercised my spirit in Reading and Meditation to find out in the sacred Scriptures and consider what Directions might be most available to further your or any others so great a Happiness and have judged best and resolved to bind together some easie Rules of Guidance both for Choice and Life-lasting Possession of such an unvaluable Treasure in the mode or term of a rich Chain of Gold with twenty spiritual Gold-links of Love more pretious then Rubies or sparkling glorious Diamonds of high price and value with the noblest Lords and Ladies in the World They are a kind of body apparrelled not in Courtly attire of silken Rhetorical Elegancies or with Ear-pleasing words and delightful Expressions like some feigned Peices but presented to your Honours in a plain Country dress as desiring they should more take the Hearts with Divine spiritual Counsels in them then the Ear with the sound of pleasing words filled with fancied matters which often times prove but loss of pretious time without any Soul-profit to the Readers Now if you honoured Lord and you noble Ladies please to accept of this Gold Chain of Love as the Testimony of my hearty Desire of your true good both Spiritual and Temporal and the best Gift I am now provided to present unto you I shall esteem it a noble Favour and continue my daily Prayers to God for his blessing upon my ever honoured Lord and Lady your Honourable Parents upon your Honours and all their Honourable Posterity and Relations and Remain From my Study in Waltham in Leicester-shire Novemb 2. 1668. Right Noble Lord and ever honoured Ladies Your aged Servant ready to Honour and Serve you in and for the Lord Jesus Christ Immanuel Bourne Aged 78 years compleat if I live until Dec. 27. next preserved hitherto through Gods mercy Lam. 3. 22 23. THE EPISTLE Dedicatory general To all honoured Christians who have taken upon them the honorable Estate of Matrimony or that intend if God so order it to be marrried hereafter and desire a blessed Union and Communion in a married condition that they may live lovingly together as Heirs of the Grace of Life here on Earth and be happy in Heaven for ever HOnoured Christians for so I cannot but stile all that truly know and believe in God thorough the Lord Jesus Christ our blessed Lord and Saviour since he hath loved us and washed us from our Sins in his own Blood and made us spiritual Kings and Priests unto God his Father Rev. 1.5 Marriage is honourable amongst all and the Bed undefiled but Whore-Mongers and Adulterers God will judge Hebr. 13.4 And Love is the bond of perfectness Col. 3.19 Now to preserve Love and prevent dishonouring of this honourable Estate I have dedicated this Gold Chain of Directions with twenty Gold-links of Love unto you I commend them to your serious Reading Meditation Application and Practise the Phrase is but plain without inticeing words of mans wisdome 1 Cor. 2.4 but the subject-matter Divine from grounds of sacred Scripture that light to our Feer and lamp to our Pathes as the Holy Ghost by the mouth of King David testifieth Acts 1.16 Holy men spake as they were inspired by the Holy Ghost 2 Pet. 1.21 Psal 119.105 And if God give a blessing and inable you to tread all your lives in these pleasant Pathes of Love they may bring more Profit and comfort to Husbands and Wives in the married estate then rich Jewels of greatest value and high esteem amongst the Princes of this World which that you may find true by daily Experience is the earnest Prayer of Your most humble SERVANT in and for
27. And how odious such Marriages are to God you may find declared by the Prophet Mal. 2.11 12. And yet how many such are in the World Families where scarce a form of Religion is to be found Strangers from prayers to God nor Morning nor Evening Prayer to be heard although God reneweth his Mercies every Morning Lamen 3.22 23. and continueth his goodness to the Night Though he declare his most gracious Prefence with us Exod. 13.21 as it were by a Pillar of a Cloud by Day and a Pillar of Fire by Night although God hath been a Defence to their Tabernacles and they have dwelt safely by his goodness yet how many are there who little or nothing take notice of these daily Mercies or observe Gods goodnesse to glorifie him How far unlike are these in this to blessed Daniel Daniel 6.10 or religious King David Psal Psal 55.17 55. who kept acquaintance with God three times a day At morning and evening and noon day will I pray and that instantly and he shall hear my voice c. And therefore they are strangers from God when they should stand in need of his help and want that good which they might enjoy by keeping acquaintance with God of which Eliphaz doth witness Job 22.21 That gracious practice of secret Prayer which our Saviour directs unto Mat. 6.6 Thou when thou prayest enter into thy Closet and shut to thy door and pray to thy Father in secret and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly How many spend so much time openly in vain that they have no leisure for secret Devotions to read and meditate of heavenly things which pertain to eternity or to poure out their Souls as Hannah did to God in Prayer 1 Sam. 1.15 Alas if sins of omission were the only irreligiousness or prophaneness in some Families it were lesse although for these men shall be called to an account at the Day of the last Judgment witness what our Blessed Lord and Saviour declareth Mat. 25.41 42. But their sins of Commission common breach of Gods Commandements witness little fear of God to be before their eyes What common swearing and taking of Gods name in vain forgetting that God threatens he will not hold such guitlesse that take his Name in vain Exod. 20.7 or did men remember that of the Lord by the Prophet Jer. 5.7 How shall I Pardon thee for this thy Children have forsaken me and sworn by them that are no Gods Men yea Children would not swear so commonly by those things which they themselves will confesse are no Gods How difficult a thing is it to hire a Servant from amongst the common sort of People Read Rom. 12.14 Psal 109.17 18. And Mat. 5.34 35 36 37. James 5.12 but they are Swearers or Cursers or both and so Gods Name is dishonoured Children learn of Parents to be irreligious and this too often amongst the Rich as well as Poor I say but little of that common sin too often in greater Families inticing men to Drunkenness by that specious pretence of pledging Healths of Friends pressing men in Drink Read Hab 2 2.15 16. A dreadful Woe to such contrary to that Law and Practice of that Moral Prince King Ahasuerus that none should compel to Drink Hester 2.8 But every one be free to drink what he pleased a shame to men that professe themselves Christians I know in divers great Families there is civility if not a religious respect to avoid these sins But when these abound and men or women rashly unite themselves in Marriage what hope of constant happy Love to continue between Husband and Wife during life I proceed to a second Gold-link of Love between Husband and Wife The second Gold-link of Love that in choice of a Wife or Husband as respect is to be had for likenesse and agreement in Religion so likewise to equality or likeness of qualities and conditions as near as possible For as St. Paul adviseth not to be unequally yoaked with Unbelievers so he presseth his Counsel with a good Argument What fellowship saith he hath righteousness with unrighteousness and what Communion hath Light with Darkness 2 Cor. 6.14 So even right reason will instruct us and daily experience witness that contrary Dispositions of nature or too great inequalities seldom live comfortably together as Fire and Water will not agree the one exsiccateth or quencheth the other But like rejoyceth and delighteth with the like Observe this Rule then for this is a second Direction or Gold-link of Love to preserve Love between Husband and Wife A third Direction A third Direction or Gold-link of Love or Gold-link of Love followeth And this is That some fit respect be had to the age of the Parties to be married for a young man of twenty to marry an old woman man of above three-score or for an old man of fourscore to marry a young woman under twenty is not agreeable because one chief end of Marriage is in danger to be frustrate Gen. 1.27 28. which is Posterity to be brought up in the fear and admonition of the Lord as Sr. Paul intimateth Ephes 6.4 Although it is more fit for a very old man to marry a young woman in hope of Posterity then for a very old woman past child-bearing to marry a young man Equality and conveniency do best agree together for the preservation of Conjugal Love between Husband and Wife and this is a third Gold-Link in this Gold Chain of Direction to keep and bind Love fast between Husband and Wife during their Lives The fourth Direction A fourth Direction or Gold-link of love or Gold-Link of Love in a marriage Union there ought to be likenesse and agreement of affection a mutual love and likeing of each others persons and qualities and a knitting and uniting of Hearts together in a right ordered and well grounded Love before the joyning of Hands on the Wedding-Day For where there is an Antipathy or contrariety of Natures or dislike of Persons or Conditions there seldome is a continuance of sweet agreement and satisfaction one to and with another and so Marriage proveth a Bondage instead of a sweet freedom in a happy enjoyment of each other in the Lord as St. Paul desired to enjoy and have joy of Philemon in the Lord St. Paul his Epistle to Philemon verse 20. in whom what we enjoy is a blessing by Christ whereas if the Hearts be truly knit together and united in Love as the heart of Jonathan to David 1 Sam. 18.1 who loved him as his own Soul the Love will be wonderful as was Jonathans to David passing the love of Women 2 Sam. 1.26 Although the love of good women to their Husbands hath been wonderful as Records of ancient Histories do witnesse at full I mean not a light unconstant passionate Love taken upon sight of Beauty or Riches or some such uncertain foundation which is deceitful