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A54240 The wits academy, or, The muses delight consisting of merry dialogues upon various occasions composed of mirth, wit, and eloquence, for a help to discourse to such as have had but small converse with the critical sort of people, which live in this censorious age : as also, divers sorts of letters upon several occasions both merry and jocose, helpful for the inexpert to imitate, and pleasant to those of better judgement, at their own leisure to peruse : with a perfect collection of all the newest and best songs, and catches, that are, and have been lately in request at court, and both the theatres. W. P. 1677 (1677) Wing P139; ESTC R4337 143,775 351

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my faults then I can have the considence to ask your pardon pray Sir be therefore satisfied in my protestations that I not only love but also honour you I shall endeavour so to use my time to the best advantage of my future good that you my aged Parents may have joy and comfort at all times when ever you see my face Learning I know is a most precious Jewel not to be obtained without a careful study and industry my diligence shall therefore be to the utmost of my power to acquire to my self so rich a gem which is of that great value You know that none shall ever reap the profit of your Learning but your self therefore my child seek it and thou shalt have it I am glad to hear that you are merry for it is a sign that you are in health but let me advise you Child to have a care that Vanity take not up too much Room in your mind and heart supplying that place which should contain profounder knowledge stealing away your thoughts from following better things I always Sir do consult with reason in my affairs before I pitch upon any design therefore after I have had some small time to deliberate my thoughts I shall be ready and willing to give you my opinion and best judgement in this matter Love is a thing that I never yet studied therefore you tell me strange news about it but I will consider on 't and if I find I can love any Man it shall be you as soon as any body I know of But since our Parents angry are and will not give their consents that we should marry together I am resolved if you will agree to appoint a time when privately we may make our selves happy though against their wills 'T is true I love and that you know full well but willingly would have our Friend 's good will yet since you are resolved to take me at a venture name but the time and I will surely meet you for I had rather offend all my friends then in the least to prove unkind or fickle to thee my dearest Love and only joy Admire not that I appear to be somewhat strange to your propositions for I know that you have ever been unconstant therefore I shall be careful how I settle my affections on a sudden Stoop not so low as once to condescend to act such folly for ruine will attend all those that without consideration match themselves to such extravagancy I heartily could wish the time were come that both our hearts and hands might be united I willingly would run a lawful course yet hardly can indure to stay so long why should I be delayed from that sweet enjoyment which every night I dream on without redress 't is real pleasure that I want my dear Conclusions and endings of Letters of all sorts and upon all occasions THus do I take my leave and submit my self to your Lordships pleasure who am The humblest of your Scrvitors A. B. I never thought my self more happy then when I was busie in prosecuting your Worship's just commands therefore let me beg of you to harbour no ill opinion of him who is The only admirer of your Worship's virtues B. C. Thus honoured Sir do I commit my self to your just censure knowing that you will be favourable to Your distressed Servant C. D. Much might be added worthy Sir upon this same business but time will not give me leave any longer to insist thereon I therefore at this time shall conclude and only acknowledge that I am and ever will be to my death Your faithful Friend and most humble Servant D. E. But lest I should seem troublesome in being too tedious in this my Letter I shall only add this to my former acknowledgements that I am Your most obliged and most faithful Servant E. F. Consider well on what I have writ you word of and meditate on it at your leisure which is all from Your affectionate Father F. G. What ever you have writ to me shall so deeply be lodged in my breast that nothing but death shall take it from thence which I hope will be a satisfaction to you from Sir Your dutiful Son G. H. My dearest-Soul blame me not for my suspition and jealousie of thy unconstancy but rather pardon it for it proceeds from the abundance of love of him who is The only adorer of thy beauty H. I. And if your suspition Sir be grounded out of your own imagination and all without cause I shall not desire that you should adore me but imploy your time in learning to be wiser and that is all from her who is Yours more then you deserve I. K. But to sum up all complements in one Line I am Sir Yours till death in death and after death K. L. Now since your folly I have pretty well discovered I think it is time to leave off at this time only telling you that I am Your Friend more than you are your own L. M. Therefore Sir let me desire you not to question my fidelity in this concern but rely wholly upon Your most faithful Friend M. N. Ah Madam what shall I say more that might move you to compassion a thousand Sheets of Paper would be too little to contain the full description of my sorrows which night and day I do undergo for want of the enjoyment of your Love 't is nothing else I ask dear Madam but one smile from your sweet self which if you would but grant it would revive Your languishing and disconsolate Lover N. O. That which you ask dear Sir I out of pitty grant for it never shall be said that I should so disturb so likely and so hopeful a Gentleman as your self in denying him so small a request when next you please to see me again I 'le meet you with a smile and if that won't do I 'le smile again and so continue till you shall be satisfied then I hope you will be pleased with her who is Your compassionate and most loving Friend M. P. And Joan I now have only this to tell thee that in good truth I love thee dearly who am called by the name of Robin Hog And that I may end my Letter just as you have done Robin I must tell you that I love you as well as you love me which I had almost forgot but I think such good words do never come too late this is all from her who is thine and honestly known by my proper name being my Mothers name who was born before me Joan Sow Superscriptions for Letters suitable for all Degrees and Qualities of Men and Women TO the most High and Mighty Monarch His sacred Majesty of Great Brittain Or thus To the most Gracious and Victorious Monarch Caesar Augustus Salutem Nobility To the most Illustrious Prince To his Royal Highness James Duke of York But to other Dukes thus To the most Renowned Duke To the Right Honourable Earl of c. To the
Honourable Lord. Gentry To the Right Worshipful R. T. Knight Baronet To the Worshipful R. T. Knight To the Worshipful Esquire To the most Impartial and upright Judges To the most wise and most discreet States-man To the most pious most grave and most religious Clergy-man To Professors of Liberal Arts and Sciences To the most Eloquent and most florid Rhetorician To the most Skilful most Learned and approved Physician To the most crafty and most subtle Logician To Poets thus To the Muses best adorers Or thus To the Laureated Society To Lawyers thus To the most skilful and most Impartial Friend c. To the most skilful and most aiery Musician To his worthy and noble and highly esteemed Patron To Kindred and Relations To his Honoured and Welbeloved Father H. P. To his dear and tender Mother To his most affectionate Brother or Sister To his dearly beloved Wise To her dearly beloved Husband To his loving Unkle To the honourable Colonel To the couragious and most valiant Captain To Lovers To the Life of my Soul Mrs. A. B. To the Mistress of my best thoughts E. C. To the fair hands of the Honoured Lady To the fair hands of the Honoured Lady Madam R. S. To the fulness of my true contentment Mistress S. L. To the hope of my Fortunes Mrs. J. P. To my best choice Mrs. P. P. To the only joy of my heart Mrs. D. D. To my Heaven upon Earth Mrs. J. F. To the fairest and most Angelical Beauty in the whole Universe Mrs. R. T. To the adored and most venerable demi-goddess Madam J. K. To ordinary Friends and Acquaintance These to his loving and much esteemed Friend Mr. A. B. These to his true and trusty Friend Mr. B. C. To his honourable Friend Mr. C. D. To her newly displeased Friend Mr. D. E. To her best resolved Friend Mr. E. F. To her well advised Friend Mr. F. G. To his loving and long expected Friend Mr. G. H. To her most disquieted Friend Mr. H. I. To his respected Friend Mr. J. K. To his approved Friend Mrs. K. L. To her most worthy Friend Mrs. L. M. To his well experienced and most esteemed noble Friend Mr. M. N. To his well disposed Friend N. O. To his much disordered Friend O. P. To his unkind and ill advised Friend P. Q. To his perjur'd and lascivious Wife R. S. at her Lodgings in Moor-fields To the jealous Pimp and Cuckold my Husband S. S. at his Lodgings in Whetstones-Park To his suddenly displeased Friend Mr. S. T. To her worthy Friend Mr. T. T. adventurer in Barbadoes To his true and trusty Friend Mr. V. W. Factor in Jamaica Doctor in Divinity To the most pious and most Learned Doctor W. A. Doctor in Physick To the most eminent and most skilful Doctor A. B. To a Bishop To the most Holy most Learned most Benevolent and most Reverend Father in God John Lord Bishop of c. To Mrs. Twattle you may easily find the house For she at Mr. Woodcock 's does carouse Posies for Rings or Motto's fit for Presents I Love you well Your self can tell Let Virtue guide My lawful Bride Sure you mistake That bargain 's to make My tender heart Disdain makes smart My Love Shall ever faithful prove I moan Because I lie alone Absence ne're parts Two loving hearts This and the giver Are thine for ever I vow to kiss Her that reads this The Love I owe In this I show No Turtle Dove Shall shew more Love As I affect thee So respect me The gift is small But Love is all When this you see Remember me This to a Friend I freely send Well directed If well accepted I 'le not express What you may guess When this you see Think well of me Virtue and Love Are from above More near to me Then Life can be Though Friends cross Love We 'll meet above 'T is Love alone Makes two but one You and I Will Lovers die I seek to be Both thine and thee I am sure to die If you deny In thee each part Doth catch a heart My true Love is Endless as this When Cupid fails The eye prevails Your blest sight Is my delight I wish to have But blush to crave I wish you knew What I owe you My constant Love Shall ne're remove Take this in part Of my true heart For one sweet kiss I give you this Nothing for thee Too dear can be Desire like fire Doth still aspire In troth you know It must be so My Love you know Then say not no. If you this foregoe You are my foe I love thee Jone And thee alone I love thee John Therefore come on My mind is bent And I am content I 'le venture Till I find Love's center I was an Ass Should I let you pass In midst of grief Love sends relief Where Hearts agree No strife can be I joy to find A constant mind Love never dies Where Virtue lies Love's delight Is to unite Let Friend nor Foe This secret know I must confess Love goes by guess The nigher kin The further in What I have done Declare to none My name is Harry And Doll I 'le marry Come when you will I am yours still I 'le take my Oath To part I 'm loath I 'le swear and vow That I love you I hope to meet Some kisses sweet Though this be small You shall have all When I am well Have at thee Nell I hope your mind's To Love inclin'd Forgive Or else I cannot live You 'l ever find Me very kind I am full of Love Towards you my Dove I this present With good intent What more I owe You 'l shortly know True Friends By Love are made amends Cupid's command Who can withstand Think well of me When this you see When you see this Blow me a kiss My only joy Be not so coy I love till death Shall stop my breath Unto the end I 'le be your Friend A COLLECTION OF THE Nevvest Songs AND MERRY CATCHES WHICH Are now sung either at Court or Theatres SONG I. WHy should so much beauty fear Round this Isle the Heavens appear Like your own streams undisturb'd and clear Those beauteous Nymphs unfrightned too Not minding what another shews they do Their innocent delight pursue Why should so much beauty dye Or so sweet a Soul deny The delights of those keep company But whilst 't is fresh and blossoming Ne're make delays in any thing But grant those joys most pleasure bring Your sweet smiles and dimple cheek Fatal are to all they meet And lay them prostrute at your feet Then dear Nymph for once be kind Let sighs and skricks be left behind Whilst innocent our sport we find SONG II. NOw that the cold Winter 's expell'd by the Sun And the Fields that did pennance in Snow Have put Madam Natures gay Livery on Embroyder'd with flowers to make a fine show Since the Hills and the Valleys with pleasure abound Let Mortals bear a part and