As I before remembred all our state And God consigning to my good intents No prince nor peere shall haue iust cause to say God shorten Harries happy life one day exit Enter sir Iohn Shallow Scilens Dauy Bardolfe page Shal. Nay you shall see my orchard where in an arbour we will eate a last yeeres pippen of mine owne graffing with a dish of carrawaies and so forth come coosin Scilens and then to bed Falst. Fore God you haue here goodly dwelling and rich Shal. Barraine barraine barraine beggars all beggars all sir Iohn mary good ayre spread Dauy spread Dauy well saide Dauy. Fal. This Dauy serues you for good vses hee is your seruing-man and your husband Shal. A good varlet a good varlet a very good varlet sir Iohn by the mas I haue drunke too much sacke at supper a good varlet now sit downe now sit downe come cosin Scilens A sirra quoth a we shall do nothing but eate and make good cheere and praise God for the merry yeere when â—lesh is cheape and females dear and lusty laddes roame here and there so merely and euer among so merily sir Iohn There 's a merry heart good M. Silens I le giue you a health for that anon Shal. Giue master Bardolfe some wine Dauy. Dauy Sweet sir sit I le be with you anon most sweet sir sit master Page good master Page sit proface what you want in meate wee le haue in drink but you must beare the heart's al. Shal. Be mery master Bardolfe and my litle souldier there be merry Scilens Be merry be mery my wife has all for women are shrowes both short and tall t is merry in hal when beards wags all and welcome mery shrouetide be mery be mery Falst. I did not thinke master Scilens had bin a man of this mettall Scilens Who I I haue beene mery twice and once ere now Enter Dauy. Dauy There 's a dish of Lether-coates for you Shal. Dauy Dauy Your worship I le be with you straight a cup of wine sir. Scilens A cup of wine that 's briske and fine and drinke vnto the leman mine and a mery heart liuâ—â— long a. Falst. Well said master Scilens Scilens And we shall be mery now comes in the sweete a' th night Falst Health and long life to you master Scilens Scilens Fill the cuppe and let it come I le pledge you a mile too th bottome Shal. Honest Bardolfe welcome if thou wantst any thing and wilt not call be shrew thy heart welcome my little tiny theefe and welcome indeede too I le drink to master Bardolfe and to all the cabileros about London Dauy I hope to see London once ere I die Bar. And I might see you there Dauy Shal. By the mas you le crack a quarte together ha will you not master Bardolfe Bar. Yea sir in a pottle pot Sha. By Gods liggens I thanke thee the knaue will sticke by thee I can assure thee that a wil not out a t is true bred Bar. And I le stick by him sir. One knockes at doore Sha. Why there spoke a King lacke nothing be mery looke who 's at doore there ho who knockes Falst. Why now you haue done me right Sâ—lens Do me right and dub me Knight samingoâ—ist not so Falst. T is so Silens I st so why then say an olde man can do somewhat Dauy And t please your worship there 's one Pistoll come from the court with newes enter Pistol Falst. From the Court let him come in how now Pistol Pistol Sir Iohn God saue you Falst. What wind blew you hither Pistol Pistol Not the ill winde which blowes no man to good sweete Knight thou art now one of the greatest men in this Realme Silens Birlady I think a bâ— but goodman Puffe of Barson Pisto Puffe Puffe ith thy teeth most recreant coward base sir Iohn I am thy Pistol and thy frend and helter skelter haue I rode to thee and tidings do I bring and luckie ioyes and golden times and happy news of price Iohn I pray thee now deliuer them like a man of this world Pistol A footre for the world and worldlings base I speake of Affrica and golden ioyes Iohn O base Assirian Knight what is thy newes let King Couetua know the truth thereof Scilens And Robin Hood Scarlet and Iohn Pistol Shal dunghill curs confront the Helicons and shall good newes be baffled then Pistoll lay thy head in Furies lap Shal. Honest gentleman I know not your breeding Pistol Why then lament therefore Shal. Giue me pardon sir if sir you come with newes from the court I take it there 's but two waies either to vtter them or conceale them I am sir vnder the King in some authoritie Pistol Vnder which King Besonian speake or die Shal. Vnder King Harry Pistol Harry the fourth or fift Shal. Harry the fourth Pist A fowtre for thine office sir Iohn thy tender lambkin now is King Harry the fifts the man I speake the truth when Pistol lies do this and fig me like the bragging spaniard Falst. What is the old King dead Pistol As nayle in doore the things I speake are iust Fal. Away Bardolfe saddle my horse M. Robert Shallow choose what office thou wilt in the land t is thine Pistol I will double charge thee with dignities Bard. O ioyful day I would not take a Knight for my fortune Pistol What I do bring good newes Falst. Carry master Scilens to bed master Shallow my lord Shalow be what thou wilt I am fortunes steward get on thy boots wee l ride al night ô sweet Pistol away Bardolf com Pistol vtter more to me and withall deuise something to doe thy selfe good boote boote master Shallow I know the yong King is sicke for me let vs take any mans horses the lawes of England are at my commandement blessed are they that haue bin my friends and woe to my Lord chiefe Iustice. Pist. Let vultures vile seize on his lungs also where is the life that late I led say they why here it is welcome these plesant dayes exit Enter Sincklo and three or foure officers Host. No thou arrant knaue I would to God that I might die that I might haue thee hangd thou hast drawn my shoulder out of ioynt Sincklo The Constables haue deliuered her ouer to mee and shee shal haue whipping cheere I warrant her there hath beene a man or two kild about her Whoore Nut-hooke Nut-hooke you lie come on I le tell thee what thou damnd tripe visagde rascall and the child I go with do miscarry thou wert better thou hadst strook thy mother thou paper-facde villaine Host. O the Lord that sir Iohn were come I would make this a bloody day to some body but I pray God the fruite of her wombe miscarry Sincklo If it doe you shall haue a dozzen of cushions againe you haue but eleuen nowe come I charge you both goe with mee for the man is dead that you and Pistoll
beat amongst you Whoore I le tell you what you thin man in a censor I will haue you as soundly swingde for this you blew bottle rogue you filthy famisht correctioner if you be not swingde I le forsweare halfe kirtles Sinck Come come you shee Knight-arrant come Host. O God that right should thus ouercom might wel of sufferance comes â—ase Whoore Come you rogue come bring me to a iustice Host. I come you starude blood-hound Whoore Goodman death goodman bones Host. Thou Atomy thou Whoore Come you thinne thing come you rascall Sinck Very well Enter strewers of rushes 1 More rushes more rushes 2 The trumpets haue sounded twice 3 T will be two a clocke ere they come from the coronation dispatch dispatch Trumpets sound and the King and his traine passe ouer the stage after them enter Falstaffe Shallow Pistol Bardolfe and the Boy Falst. Stand heere by me maister Shallow I will make the King doe you grace I will leere vpon him as a comes by and do but marke the countenaunce that he will giue me Pist. God blesse thy lungs good Knight Falst. Come heere Pistoll stand behinde mee O if I had had time to haue made new liueries I woulde haue bestowed the thousand pound I borrowed of you but t is no matter this poore shew doth better this doth inferre the zeale I had to seâ— him Pist. It doth so Falst. It shewes my earnestnesse of affection Pist. It doth so Falst. My deuotion Pist. It doth it doth it doth Fal. As it were to ride day night and not to deliberate not to remember not to haue pacience to shift me Shal It is best certain but to stand stained with trauaile and sweating with desire to see him thinking of nothing els putting 〈◊〉 affaires else in obliuion as if there were nothing els to bee done but to see him Pist. T is sempâ—r idem for obsque hoc nihil est t is in euery part Shal. T is so indeede Pist. My Knight I will inflame thy noble liuer and make thee rage thy Dol and Helen of thy noble thoughts is in base durance and contagious prison halde thither by most mechanical and durtie hand rowze vp reuenge from Ebon den with fell Alectoesnake for Doll is in Pistoll speakes nought but truth Falst. I will deliuer her Pist. There roared the sea and trumpet Clang or sounds Enter the King and his traine Falst. God saue thy grace King Hall my royall Hall Pist. The heauens thee gard and keep most royal â—mpe of faine Falst. God saue thee my sweet boy King My Lord chiefe iustice speake to that vaine man Iust. Haue you your wits know you what t is you speake Falst. My King my Ioue I speake to thee my heart King I know thee not old man fall to thy praiers How ill white heires becomes a foole and iester I haue long dreampt of such a kind of man So surfet-sweld so old and so prophane But being awakt I do despise my dreame Make lesse thy body hence and more thy grace Leaue gourmandizing know the graue doth gape For thee thrice wider then for other men Reply not to me with a foole-borne iest Presume not that I am the thing I was For God doth know so shall the world perceiue That I haue turnd away my former selfe So will I those that kept me company When thou dost heare I am as I haue bin Approch me and thou shalt be as thou wast The tutor and thâ— feeder of my riots Till then I banish thee on paine of death As I haue done the rest of my misleaders Not to come neare our person by ten mile For competence of life I wil allow you That lacke of meanes enforce you not to euills And as we heare you do reforme your selues We will according to your strengths and qualities Giue you aduauncement Be it your charge my lord To see performd the tenure of my word set on Iohn Master Shallow I ow you a thousand pound Shal. Yea mary sir Iohn which I beseech you to let me haue home with me Iohn That can hardly be master Shalow do not you grieue at this I shall be sent for in priuate to him looke you hee must seeme thus to the world feare not your aduauncements I will be the man yet that shal make you great Shal. I cannot perceiue how vnlesse you giue me your dublet and stuffe me out with straw I beseech you good sir Iohn let me haue fiue hundred of my thousand Iohn Sir I will be as good as my worde this that you heard was but a collour Shall A collor that I feare you will die in sir Iohn Iohn Feare no colours go with me to dinner Come lieftenant Pistol come Bardolfe Enter Iustice and prince Iohn I shall be sent for soone at night Iustice Go cary sir Iohn Falstalfe to the Fleet Take all his company along with him Fal. My lord my lord Iust. I cannot now speake I will heare you soone take them away exeunt Pist. Si fortuname tormenta spero contenta Iohn I like this faire proceeding of the Kings He hath intent his wonted followers Shall all be very well prouided for But all are banisht till their conuersations Appeare more wise and modest to the worlde Iust. And so they are Iohn The King hath cald his parlament my lord Iust. He hath Iohn I wil lay ods that ere this yeere expire We beare our ciuil swords and natiue fier As farre as France I heard a bird so sing Whose musique to my thinking pleasde the King Come will you hence Epilogue First my feare then my cursie last my speech My feare is your displeasure my cursy my duty my speech to beg your pardons if you looke for a good speech now you vndo me for what I haue to say is of mine owne making and what indeed I should say wil I doubt proue mine own marring but to the purpose and so to the venture Be it knowne to you as it is very well I was lately here in the end of a displeasing play to pray your patience for it and to promise you a better I meant indeed to pay you with this which if like an il venture it come vnluckily home I breake and you my gentle creditors loose here I promisde you I would be and here I commit my body to your mercies bate me some and I will pay you some and as most debtors do promise you infinitely and so I kneele downe before you but indeed to pray for the Queene If my tongue cannot intreate you to acquit mee will you commaund me to vse my legges And yet that were but light payment to daunce out of your debt but a good conscience will make any possible satisfaction and so woulde I all the Gentlewomen heere haue forgiuen me if the Gentlemen will not then the Gentlemen doe not agree with the Gentlewomen which was neuer seene in such an assemblie One word more I beseech you if you bee not too much cloyd with fatte meate our humble Author will continue the storie with sir Iohn in it and make you merry with faire Katharine of Fraunce where for any thing I knowe Falstaffe shall die of a sweat vnlesse already a be killd with your harde opinions for Olde-castle died Martyre and this is not the man my tongue is weary when my legges are too I wil bid you good night FINIS
THE Second part of Henrie the fourth continuing to his death and coronation of Henrie the fift With the humours of sir Iohn Falstaffe and swaggering Pistoll As it hath been sundrie times publikely acted by the right honourable the Lord Chamberlaine his seruants Written by William Shakespeare LONDON Printed by V. S. for Andrew Wise and William Aspley 1600. The second part of Henry the fourth continuing to his death and coronation of Henry the fift Enter Rumour painted full of Tongues OPen your eares for which of you wi'l stop The vent of hearing when lowd Rumor speaks I from the Orient to the drooping West Making the wind my poste-horse still vnfold The acts commenced on this ball of earth Vpon my tongues continuall slanders ride The which in euery language I pronounce Stuffing the eares of men with false reports I speake of peace while couert enmity â—nder the smile of safety woundes the world And who but Rumor who but onely I Make fearefull musters and prepar'd defence Whiles the bigge yeare swolne with some other griefe Is thought with child by the sterne tyrant Warre And no such matter Rumour is a pipe Blowne by surmizes Ieolousies coniectures And of so easie and so plaine a stop That the blunt monster with vncounted heads The still discordant wau'ring multitude Can play vpon it But what need I thus My wel knowne body to anothomize Among my houshold why is Rumor here I runne before King Harries victorie Who in a bloudy field by Shrewsbury Hath beaten downe yong Hot-spurre and his troopes Quenching the flame of bold rebellion Euen with the rebels bloud Put what meane I To speake so true at first my office is To noyse abroad that Harry Monmouth fell Vnder the wrath of noble Hot-spurs sword And that the King before the Douglas rage Stoopâ— his annointed head as low as death This haue I rumour'd through the peasant townes Betweene that royall field of Shrewsbury And this worme-eaten hole of ragged stone When Hot-spurs father old Northumberland Lies crafty sicke the postes come trying on And not a man of them brings other newes Than they haue learnt of me from Rumors tongues They bring smooth comforts false worse then true wrongs exit Rumours Enter the Lord Bardolfe at one doore Bard. Who keepes the gate here ho where is the Earle Porter What shall I say you are Bard. Tell thou the Earle That the Lord Bardolfe doth attend him heere Porter His Lordship is walkt forth into the orchard Please it your honor knocke but at the gate And he himselfe will answer Enter the Earle Northumberland Bard. Here comes the Earle Earle What newes Lord Bardolfe euery minute now Should be the father of some Stratagem The times are wild contention like a horse Full of high feeding madly hath broke loofe And beares downe all before him Bard. Noble Earle I bring you certaine newes from Shrewsbury Earle Good and God will Bard. As good as heart can wish The King is almost wounded to the death And in the fortune of my Lord your sonne Prince Harry slaine outright and both the Blunts Kild by the hand of Dowglas yong prince Iohn And Westmerland and Stafford fled the field And Harry Monmouthes brawne the hulke sir Iohn Is prisoner to your sonne O such a day So fought so followed and so fairely wonne Came not till now to dignifie the times Since Caesars fortunes Earle How is this deriu'd Saw you the field came you from Shrewsbury Bar. I spake with one my lord that came from thence enter Trauers A gentleman well bred and of good name That freely rendred me these newes for true Earle Here comes my seruant Trauers who I sent On tuesday last to listen after newes Bar. My lord I ouer-rode him on the way And he is furnisht with no certainties More then he haply may retale from me Earle Now Traâ—ers what good tidings comes with youâ— Trauers My lord sir Iohn Vmfreuile turnd me backe With ioyfull tidings and being better horst Out rode me after him came spurring hard A gentleman almost forespent with speede That stopt by me to breathe his bloudied horse He askt the way to Chester and of him I did demand what newes from Shrewsbury He told me that rebellion had bad lucke And that yong Harrie Percies spur was cold With that he gaue his able horse the head And bending forward strooke his armed heeles Against the panting sides of his poore iade Vp to the rowell head and starting so He seem'd in running to deuoure the way Staying no longer question Earle Haâ— againe Said he yong Harry Percies spur was cold Of Hot-spurre Cold-spurre that rebellion Had met ill lucke Bard. My lord I le tell you what If my yong Lord your sonne haue not the day Vpon mine honor for a silken point I le giue my Barony neuer talke of it Earle Why should that gentleman that rode by Trauers Giue then such instances of losse Bard. Who he He was some hilding fellow that had stolne The horse he rode on and vpon my life Spoke at a venter Looke here comes more news enter Morton Earle Yea this mans brow like to a title leafe Foretells the nature of a tragicke volume So lookes the strond whereon the imperious floud Hath left a witnest vsurpation Say Mourton didst thou come from Shrewsbury Mour. I ranne from Shrewsbury my noble lord Where hatefull death put on his vgliest maske To fright our partie Earle How doth my sonne and brother Thou tremblest and the whitenes in thy cheeke Is apter then thy tongue to tell thy arrand Euen such a man so faint so spirritlesse So dull so dead in looke so woe begon Drew Priams curtaine in the dead of night And would haue told him halfe his Troy was burnt But Priam found the fier ere he his tongue And I my Percies death ere thou reportst it This thou wouldst say Your son did thus and thus Your brother thus so fought the noble Dowglas Stopping my greedy eare with their bold deedes But in the end tâ— stop my eare indeed Thou hast a sigh to blow away this praise Ending with brother sonne and all are dead Mour. Douglas is liuing and your brother yet But for my Lord your sonne Earle Why he is dead See what a ready tongue Suspition hath He that but feares the thing hee would not know Hath by instinct knowledge from others eies That what he feard is chanced yet speake Mourton Tell thou an Earle his diuination lies And I will take it as a sweete disgrace And make thee rich for doing me such wrong Mour. You are too great to be by me gainsaid Your spirite is too true your feares too certaine Earle Yet for all this say not that Percie 's dead I see a strange confession in thine eie Thou shakst thy head and holdst it feare or sinne To speake a truth if he be slaine The tongne offends not that reports his death And he doth sinne that doth belie the dead Not he
which saies the dead is not aliue Yet the first bringer of vnwelcome newes Hath but a loosing office and his tongue Sounds euer after as a â—ullen bell Remembred tolling a departing friend Bard. I cannot thinke my Lord your sonne is dead Mour. I am sory I should force you to beleeue That which I would to God I had not seene But these mine eies saw him in bloudy state Rendring faint quittance wearied and out-breathd To Harry Monmouth whose swift wrath beat downe The neuer daunted Percy to the earth From whence with life he neuer more sprung vp In few his death whose spirite lent a fire Euen to the dullest peasant in his campe Being bruted once tooke fire and heate away From the best temperd courage in his troopes For from his mettâ—l was his party steeled Which once in him abated oâ— the rest Turnd on themselues like dull and heauy lead And as the thing that 's heauy in it selfe Vpon enforcement flies with greatest speed So did our men heauy in Hot-spurs losse Lend to this weight such lightnosse with their feare That arrowes fled not swifter toward their ayme Than did our souldiers aiming at their safetie Fly from the field then was that noble Worcester So soone tane prisoner and that furious Scot The bloudy Douglas whose well labouring sword Had three times slaine th' appearance of the King â—an vaile his stomacke and did grace the shame Of those that turnd their backes and in his flight Stumbling in feare was tooke the summe of all Is that the King hath wonne and hath sent out A speedy power to incounter you my lord Vnder the conduct of yong Lancaster And Westmerland this is the news at ful Earle For this I shal haue time enough to mourne In poison there is phisicke and these newes Hauing beene wel that would haue made me sicke Being sicke haue in some measure made me wel And as the wretch whose feuer-weakned ioynts Like strengthlesse hinges buckle â—â—der life Impacient of his fit breakes likâ—â— fire Out of his keepers armes euen so my limbes Weakened with griefe being â—ow enragde with griefe Are thrice themselues hence therfore thou nice crutch A scaly gauntlet now with ioynts of steele Must gloue this hand and hence thou sickly coâ—â—e Thou art a guard too wanton for the head Which princes fleshâ— with conquest ayme to hit Now bind my browes 〈◊〉 yron and approach The raggedst houre 〈…〉 and Spight dare bring To frowne vpon th' 〈◊〉 Northumberland Let heauen kisse earth now let not Natures hand Keepe the wild floud conâ—ind let Order die And let this world no longer be a stage To feed contention in a lingring act But let one spirite of the first borne Cain Raigne in all bosomes that ech heart being set On bloudy courses the rude sceane may end And darknesse be the burier of the dead Vmfr. This strained passion doth you wrong my lord Bard. Sweet earle diuorce not wisedom from your honor Mour. The liues of all your louing complices Leaue on you health the which if you giue ore To stormy passion must perforce decay Bard. We all that are ingaged to this losse Knew that we ventured on such dangerous seas That if we wrought out life t was ten to one And yet we venturd for the gaine proposde Choakt the respect of likely perill fear'd And since we are oreset venture againe Come we will al put forth body and goods Mour. T is more then time and my most noble lord I heare for certaine and dare speake the truth North. I knew of this before but to speake truth This present griefe had wipte it from my mind Go in with me and counsell euery man The aptest way for safety and reuenge Get postes and letters and make friends with speed Neuer so few and neuer yet more need exeunt Enter sir Iohn alone with his page bearing his sword and buckler Iohn Sirra you giant what saies the doctor to my water Page He said sir the water it self was a good healthy water but for the party that owed it he might haue moe diseases then he knew for Iohn Men of al sorts take a pride to gird at me the braine of this foolish compouÌ„ded clay-man is not able to inuent any thing that intends to laughter more then I inuent or is inueÌ„ted on me I am not only witty in my selfe but the cause that wit is in other men I do here walk before thee like a sow that hath ouerwhelmd al her litter but one if the prince put thee into my seruice for any other reason then to sett me off why then I haue no iudgement thou horeson mandrake thou art sitter to be worne in my cap then to wait at my heels I was neuer manned with an agot till now but I wil in-set you neither in golde nor siluer but in vile apparell and send you backe againe to your master for a iewell the â—â—uenall the prince your master whose chin is not yet fledge I will sooner haue a beard grow in the palme of my hand then he shal get one off his cheek yet he will not sticke to say his face is a face royal God may finish it when he will t is not a haire amisse yet he may keepe it still at a face royall for a barber shall neuer earne sixpence out of it and yet hee le be crowing as if he had writte man euer since his father was a batcheler he may keepe his owne grace but hee s almost out of mine I can assure him what said master Dommelton about the sattin for my short cloake and my sloppes Boy He saide sir you should procure him better assurance then Bardolfe he would not take his band and yours he liked not the securitie sir Iohn Let him be damn'd like the glutton pray God his tongue be hotter a horeson A chitophella rascall yea forsooth knaue to beare a gentle man in hand and then stand vpon security the horson smoothy-pates doe now weare nothing but hie shooes and bunches of keyes at their girdles and if a man is through with them in honest taking vp then they must stand vppon security I had as liue they would put ratsbane in my mouth as offer to stop it with security I lookt a should haue sent me two and twenty yards of sattin as I am a true knight and he sends me security well he may sleepe in security for he hath the horne of abundance and the lightnesse of his wife shines through it where 's Bardolf yet can not he see though he haue his owne lanthorne to light him Boy Hee s gone in Smithfield to buy your worship a horse sir Iohn I bought him in Paules and hee le buy me a horse in Smithfield and I could get me but a wife in the stewes I were manâ—d horsde and wiuâ—d Enter Lord chiefe Iustice. Boy Sir here comes the noble man that committed the prince for striking him about Bardolfe sir Iohn Wait close I will
not see him Iustice What 's hee that goes there seru. Falstaâ—fe and 't please your lordship Iust. He that was in question for the rob'ry seru. He my Lord but he hath since done good seruice at Shrewsbury as heare is now going with some charge to the lord Iohn of â—ancaster Iust. What to Yorke call him backe againe seru. Sir Iohn Falstaffe Iohn Boy tell him I am deafe Boy You must speake lowder my master is deafe Iust. I am sure he is to the hearing of any thing good goe plucke him by the elbow I must speake with him seru. Sir Iohn Falst. What a yong knaue and begging is there not wars is there not employment doth not the King lacke subiects do not the rebels need souldiers though it be a shame to be on any side but one it is worse shame to beg then to be on the worst side were it worse then the name of Rebellion can tell how to make it seru. You mistake me sir. Iohn Why sir did I say you were an honest man setting my knighthood and my souldiership aside I had lied in my throat if I had said so seru. I pray you sir then set your knighthood and your soldiership aside and giue me leaue to tell you you lie in your throate if you say I am any other then an honest man Iohn I giue thee leaue to tell me so I lay aside that which growes to me if thou getst any leaue of me hang me if thou takst leaue thou wert better be hangd you hunt couÌ„ter hence auaunt seru. Sir my Lord would speake with you Iust. Siâ— Iohn Falstaffe a word with you Falst. My good Lord God giue your lordship good time of day I am glad to see your lordship abroade I heard say your lordship was sicke I hope your lordship goes abroade by aduise your lordship though not clean past your youth haue yet some smack of an aguein you some relish of the saltnes of time in you and I most humbly beseech your lordship to haue a reuerend care of your health Iustice Sir Iohn I sent for you before your expedition to Shrewsbury sir Iohn An dt please your lorship I heare his maiesty is returnd with some discomfort from Wales Iust. I talke not of his maiesty you would not come when I sent for you Falst. And I heare moreouer his highnes is falne into this same horson a poplexi Iust. Well God mend him I pray you let me speake with you Falst. This appoplexi as I take it is a kind of lethergie and 't please your lordship a kind of sleeping in the bloud a horson tingling Iust. What tell you me of it be it as it is Falst. It hath it originall from much griefe from study and perturbation of the braine I haue read the cause of his effects in Galen it is a kind of deafenes Iust. I think you are falne into the disease for you heare noâ— what I say to you Old Very wel my lord very wel rather and 't please you it is the disease of not listning the maladie of not marking that I am troubled withall Iust. To punish you by the heeles would amend the attention of your eares and I care not if I doe become your phisitian Falst. I am as poore as Iob my lord but not so pacient your Lordship may minister the potion of imprisonment to me in respect of pouerty but how I should be your pacient to follow your prescriptions the wise may make som dramme of a scruple or indeede a scruple it selfe Iust. I sent for you when there were matters against you for your life to come speake with me Falst. As I was then aduisde by my learned counsail in the lawes of this land seruice I did not come Iust. Wel the truth is sir Iohn you liue in great infamy Falst. He that buckles himselfe in my belt cannot liue in lesse Iust. Your meanes are very slender and your waste is great Falst. I would it were otherwise I would my meanes were greater and my waste slender Iust. You haue misled the youthfull prince Falst. The yong prince hath misled me I am the felow with the great belly and he my dogge Iust. Wel I am loth to gall a new heald wound your daies seruice at Shrewsbury hath a little guilded ouer your nights exploit on Gadshill you may thanke thâ—vnquiet time for your quiet oreposting that action Falst. My lord Iust. But since all is well keepe it so wake not a sleeping wolfe Falst. To wake a wolfe is as bad as smell a fox Iust. VVhat you are as a candle the better part burnt out Falst. A wassel candle my lord al tallow if I did say of wax my growth would approue the truth Iust. There is not a white haire in your face but should haue his effect of grauity Falst. His effect of grauy grauie grauie Iust. You â—ollow the yong prince vp and downe like his ill angell Falst. Not so my lord your ill angell is light but I hope he that lookes vpon me will take me without weighing and yet in some respects I grant I cannot go I cannot tell vertue is of so little regard in these costar-mongers times that true valour is turnd â—erod Pregnancie is made a Tapster his quick wit wasted in giuing reckonings all the other giftes appertinent to man as the malice of his age shapes the one not worth a goosbery you that are old consider not the capacities of vs that are yong you doe measure the heate of our liuers with the bitternesse of your gâ—lles and we that are in the vaward of our youth I must confesse are wagges too Lo. Do you set downe your name in the scroule of youth that are written downe old with all the characters of age haue you not a moist eie a dry hand a yelow cheeke a white beard a decreasing leg an increasing belly is not your voice broken your winde short your chinne double your wit single and euery part about you blasted with antiquitie and will you yet call your selfe yong fie fie fie sir Iohn Iohn My Lorde I was borne about three of the clocke in the afternoone with a white head and something a round bellie for my voyce I haue lost it with hallowing and singing of Anthems to approoue my youth further I will not the truth is I am onely olde in iudgement and vnderstanding and hee that wil caper with me for a thousand markes let him lend me the money and haue at him for the boxe of the â—eâ—re that the Prince gaue you he gaue it like a rude Prince and you tooke it like a sensible Lord I haue checkt him for it and the yong lion repents mary not in ashes and sackcloth but in new silke and olde sacke Lord Well God send the prince a better companion Iohn God send the companion a better prince I cannot ridde my hands of him Lord Well the King hath seuerd you I heare you are going with lord Iohn
of Lancaster against the Archbishop and the Earle of Northumberland Iohn Yea I thanke your prety sweet witte for it but looke you pray all you that kisse my lady Peace at home that our armies ioyne not in a hote day for by the Lord I take but two shirts out with me and I meane not to sweate extraordinarily if it be a hot day I brandish any thing but a bottle I would I might neuer spit white again there is not a dangerous action can peepe out his head but I am thrust vpon it Wel I cannot last euer but it was alway yet the tricke of our English nation if they haue a good thing to make it too common If yee will needs say I am an olde man you should giue me rest I would to God my name were not so terrible to the enemy as it is I were better to be eaten do death with a rust than to be scoured to nothing with perpetuall motion Lord Well be honest be honest and God blesse your expedition Iohn Will your lordship lend me a thousand pound to furnish me forth Lord Not a penny not a penny you are too impatient to beare crosses fare you well commend mee to my coosine Westmerland Iohn If I do fillip me with a three man beetle A man can no more separate age and couetousnesse than a can part yong limbs and lechery but the gowt galles the one and the pox pinches the other and so both the degrees preuent my curses boy Boy Sir Iohn What money is in my purse Boy Seuen groates and two pence Iohn I can get no remedy against this consumption of the purse borrowing onely lingers and lingers it out but the disease is incurable Go beare this letter to my lord of Lancaster this to the Prince this to the Earle of Westmerland and this to olde mistris Vrsula whome I haue weekely sworne to marry since I perceiud the first white haire of my chin about it you know where to finde me a pox of this gowt or a gowt of this pox for the one or the other playes the rogue with my great toe T is no matter if I doe hault I haue the warres for my color and my pension shal seeme the more reasonable a good wit will make vse of any thing I will turne diseases to commoditie Exeunt Enter th' Archbishop Thomas Mowbray Earle Marshall the Lord Hastings Fauconbridge and Bardolfe Bishop Thus haue you heard our cause and knowne our meanes And my most noble friends I pray you al Speake plainely your opinions of our hopes And first Lord Marshall what say you to it Marsh. I well allow the occasion of our armes But gladly would be better satisfied How in our meanes we should aduance ourselues To looke with forehead bold and big enough Vpon the power and puissance of the King Hast. Ou◠〈…〉 musters grow vpon the file To fiue aâ—d tweâ—ty thousand men of choise And our supplies liue largely in the hope Of great Northumberland whose bosome burnes With an incensed fire of iniuries Bard. The question then Lord Hastings standeth thus Whether our present fiue and twentie thousand May hold vp head without Northumberland Hast. With him we may Bard. Yea mary there 's the point But if without him we be thought too feeble My iudgement is we should not step too far Bish. T is very true lord Bardolfe for indeede It was yong Hot-spurs cause at Shrewsbury Bard. It was my Lord who lined himselfe with hope Eating the ayre and promise of supplie Flattring himselfe in proiect of a power Much smaller then the smallest of his thoughts And so with great imagination Proper to mad-men led his powers to death And winking leapt into destruction Hast. But by your leaue it neuer yet did hurt To lay downe likelihoods and formes of hope Bard. We fortifie in paper and in figures Vsing the names of men in steed of men Like on that drawes the model of an house Beyond his power to build it who halfe thorough Giues ore and leaues his part-created cost A naked subiect to the weeping clowdes And waste for churlish winters tyrannie Hast. Grant that our hopes yet likely of faire birth Should be stil borne and that we now possest The vtmost man of expectation I thinke we are so body strong enough Euen as we are to equal with the King Bard. What is the King but â—iue and twenty thousand Hast. To vs no more nay not so much 〈◊〉 Bardolfe For his diuisions as the times do brawle And in three heads one power against the French And one against Glendower perforce a third Must take vp vs so is the vnfirme King In three diuided and his coffers sound With hollow pouertie and emptinesse Bish. That he should draw his seuerall strengths togither And come against vs in full puissance Need not to be dreaded Hast. If he should do so French and Welch he leaues his back vnarmde they baying him at the heeles neuer feare that Bar. Who is it like should leade his forces hither Hast. The Duke of Lancaster and Westmerland Against the Welsh himself and Harry Monmouth But who is substituted against the French I haue no certaine notice Bish. Shall we go draw our numbers and set on Hast. We are Times subiects and Time bids be gone ex Enter Hostesse of the Tauerne and an Officer or two Hostesse Master Phang haue you entred the action Phang It is entred Host. Where 's your yeoman i st a lusty yeoman wil a stand too 't Phang Sirra where 's Snare Host. O Lord I good master Snare Snare Here here Phang Snare we must arest sir Iohn Falstaffe Host. Yea good master Snare I haue entred him and all Snare It may chaunce cost some of vs our liues for he will stabbe Host. Alas the day take heed of him he stabd me in mine owne house most beastly in good faith a cares not what mischiefe he does if his weapon be out he will foyne like any diuell he will spare neither man woman nor child Phang If I can close with him I care not for his thrust Host. No nor I neither le be at your elbow Phang And I but fist him once and a come but within my view Host. I am vndone by his going I warrant you hee s an infinitiue thing vppon my score good maister Phang holde him sure good master Snare let him not scape a comes continually to Pie corner sauing your manhoods to buy a saddle and he is indited to dinner to the Lubbers head in Lumbert streete to master Smooths the silk man I pray you since my exion is entred and my case so openly knowne to the worlde let him be brought in to his answer a hundred marke is a long one for a poore lone woman to beare and I haue borne and borne and borne and haue bin fubd off and fubd off and fubd off from this day to that day that it is a shame to be thought on there is no honesty
in such dealing vnlesse a woman should be made an asse and a beast to beare euery knaues wrong yonder he comes and that arrant malmsie-nose knaue Bardolfe with him do your offices do your offices master PhaÌ„g master Snare do me do me do me your offices Enter sir Iohn and Bardolfe and the boy Falst. How now whose mare's dead what 's the matter Phang I arrest you at the sute of mistris quickly Falst. Away varlets draw Bardolfe cut me off the villaines head throw the queane in the channell Host. Throw me in the channell I le throw thee in the channel wilt thou wilt thou thou bastardly rogue murder murder a thou honisuckle villaine wilt thou kill Gods officers and the Kings a thou honiseed rogue thou art a honiseed a man queller and a woman queller Falst. Keepe them off Bardolfe Offic. A reskew a reskew Host. Good people bring a reskew or two thou wot wot thou thou wot wot ta do do thou rogue do thou hempseed Boy Away you scullian you rampallian you fustilarian I le tickle your catastrophe Enter Lord chiefe iustice and his men Lord What is the matter keepe the peace here ho. Hostesse Good my lord be good to me I beseech you stand to me Lord How now sir Iohn what are you brawling here Doth this become your place your time and businesse You should haue bin well on your way to Yorke Stand from him fellow wherefore hang'st thou vpon him Host. O my most worshipful Lord and 't please your grace I am a poore widdow of Eastâ—heape and he is arrested at my sute Lord For what summe Host. It is more then for some my Lord it is for al I haue he hath eaten me out of house and home he hath put all my substance into that fat belly of his but I will haue some of it out againe or I wil ride thee a nights like the mare Falst. I think I am as like to ride the mare if I haue any vantage of ground to get vp Lord How comes this sir Iohn what man of good temper would endure this tempest of exclamation are you not ashamed to inforce a poore widdow to so rough a course to come by her owne Falst. What is the grosse summe that I owe thee Host. Mary if thou wert an honest man thy selfe and the mony too thou didst sweare to me vpon a parcell guilt goblet sitting in my dolphin chamber at the round table by a sea cole fire vpon wednesday in Wheeson weeke when the prince broke thy head for liking his father to a singing man of Winsor thou didst sweare to me theÌ„ as I was washing thy wound to marry me and make me my lady thy wife canst thou deny 〈◊〉 did not goodwife Keech the butchers wife come in then and cal me gossip Quickly comming in to borow a messe of vinegar telling vs she had a good dish of prawnes whereby thou didst desire to eate some whereby I told thee they were ill for a greene wound and didst thou not when she was gone down stayers desire me to be no more so familiarity with such poore people saying that ere long they should cal me madam and didst thou not kisse me and bid me fetch thee thirtie shillings I put thee now to thy booke oath dome it if thon canst Falst. My lord this is a poore madeâ—oule and she saies vp and downe the towne that her eldest sonne is like you she hath bin in good case and the trueth is pouerty hath distracted her but for these foolish officers I beseech you I may haue redresse against them Lo. Sir Iohn sir Iohn I am wel acquainted with your maner of wrenching the true cause the false way it is not a confident brow nor the throng of words that come with such more then impudent sawcines from you can thrust me from a leuel conâ—ideration you haue as it appeares to me practisde vpon the easie yeelding spirite of this woman and made her serue your vses both in purse and in person Host. Yea in truth my Lord. Lo. Pray thee peace pay her the debt you owe her and vnpay the villany you haue done with her the one you may doe with sterling mony and the other with currant repentance Falst. My Lord I will not vndergoe this snepe without reply you cal honorable boldnes impudent sawcinesse if a man wil make curtsie and say nothing he is vertuous no my Lord my humble duty remembred I will not bee your sâ—â—er I say to you I do desire deliuerance from these officers being vpon hasty imployment in the Kings affayres Lord You speake as hauing power to do wrong but answer in th' effect of your reputation and satisfie the poore woman Falst. Come hither hostesse Lord Now master Gower what newes enter a messenger Gower The King my Lord and Harry prince of Wales Are neare at hand the rest the paper tells Falst. As I am a gentleman Host. Faith you said so before Falst. As I am a gentleman come no more words of it Host. By this heaunly ground I tread on I must be faine to pawne both my plate the tapestry of my dining chambers Falst. Glasses glasses is the onely drinking and for thy wals a pretty sleight drollery or the storie of the prodigal or the Iarman hunting in waterworke is worth a thousand of these bed-hangers and these flie bitten tapestrie let it be x. â— if thou canst come and t were not for thy humors there 's not a better wench in England goe wash thy face and draw the action come thou must not be in this humor with me dost not know me come come I know thou wast set on to this Host. Pray thee sir Iohn let it be but twentie nobles ifaith I am loath to pawne my pâ—â—te so God saue me law Falst. Let it alone I le make other shift you le be a foole stil. Host. Well you shall haue it though I pawne my gowne I hope you le come to supper you le pay me altogether Falst. Wil I liue goe with her with her hooke on hooke on exit hostesse and sergeant Host. Will you haue Doll Tere-sheet meete you at supper Falst. No more words le ts haue her Lord I haue heard better newes Falst. What 's the newes my lord Lord Where lay the King to night Mess. At Billingsgate my Lord. Falst. I hope my Lord al 's wel what is the newes my lord Lord Come all his forces backe Mess. No fifteen hundred foot fiue hundred horse Are marcht vp to my lord of Lancaster Against Northumberland and the Archbishop Falst. Comes the King back from Wales my noble lord Lord You shall haue letters of me presently Come go along with me good master Gower Falst. My lord Lord What 's the matter Falstaffe Maister Gower shall I intreate you with mee to dinner Gower I must waite vpon my good lord here I thank you good sir Iohn Lord Sir Iohn you loyter heere too long Being you are to
take souldiers vp In Counties as you go Falstaffe Will you suppe with mee maister Gower Lord What foolish maister taught you these manners sir Iohn Falstaffe Maister Gower if they become me not hee was a foole that taught them mee this is the right fencing grace my Lord tap for tap and so part faire Lord Now the Lord lighten thee thou art a great foole Enter the Prince Poynes sir sâ—â—â— Russel with other Prince Before God I am exceeding weary Poynes I st come to that I had thought wearines durst not haue attacht one of so hie bloud Prince Faith it does me though it discolors the complexion of my greatnes to acknowledge it doth it not shew vildly in me to desire small beere Poynes Why a Prince should not be so loosely studied as to remember so weake a composition Prince Belike then my appetite was not princely gote for by my troth I do now remember the poor creature smal beere But indeed these humble considerations make me out of loue with my greatnesse What a disgrace is it to mee to remember thy name or to know thy face to morow or to take note how many paire of silke stockings thou hast with these and those that were thy peach colourd once or to beare the inuentorie of thy shirts as one for superfluitie and another for vse But that the Tennis court keeper knows better than I for it is a low eb of linnen with thee when thou keepest not racket there as thou hast not done a great while because the rest of the low Countries haue eate vp thy holland and God knows whether those that bal out the ruines of thy linnen shal inherite his kingdom but the Midwines say the children are not in the fault wherevpon the world increases and kinreds are mightily strengthened Poynes How ill it followes after you haue labored so hard you should talke so ydlely tell me how many good yong princes woulde doe so their fathers being so sicke as yours at this time is Prince Shall I tel thee one thing Poynes Poynes Yes faith and let it be an excellent good thing Prince It shall serue among wittes of no higher breeding then thine Poynes Go to I stand the push of your one thing that you will tell Prince Mary I tell thee it is not meete that I should bee sad now my father is sicke albeit I could tell to thee as to one it pleases me for fault of a better to call my friend I could be sad and sad indeede too Poynes Very hardly vpon such a subiect Prince By this hand thou thinkest me as farre in the diuels booke as thou and Falstaffe for obduracie and persistancie let the end trie the man but I tel thee my heart bleeds inwardly that my father is so sick and keeping such vile company as thou arte hath in reason taken from me all ostentation of sorrowe Poynes The reason Prince What wouldst thou thinke of me if I should weep Poynes I woulde thincke thee a most princely hyprocrite Prince It would bee euery mans thought and thou arte a blessed felow to thinke as euery man thinkes neuer a mans thought in the world keepes the rode way better then thine euerie man would thinke me an hypocrite indeede and what accites your most worshipfull thought to thinke so Poynes Why because you haue been so lewd and so much engraffed to Falstaffe Prince And to thee Poyne By this light I am well spoke on I can heare it with mine owne â—ares the worst that they can say of me is that I am a second brother and that I am a proper fellow of my hands and those two things I confesse I cannot helpe by the masse here comes Bardolâ—e Enter Bardolfe and boy Prince And the boy that I gaue Falstaffe a had him from me Christian and looke if the â—at villaine haue not transformd him Ape Bard. God saue your grace Prince And yours most noble Bardolfe Poynes Come you vertuous asse you bashfull foole must you be blushing wherefore blush you now what a maidenly man at armes are you become i st such a matter to get a pottle-pots maidenhead Boy A calls me enow my Lord through a red lattice and I could discerne no part of his face from the window at last I spied his eies and me thought he had made two holes in the ale wiues petâ—cote and so peept through Prince Has not the boy profited Bard. Away you horson vpright rabble away Boy Away you rascally Altheas dreame away Prince Instruct vs boy what dreame boy Boy Mary my lord Althear dreampt she was deliuered of a firebrand and therefore I call him her dreame Prince A crownes worth of good interpretation there t is boy Poines O that this blossome could be kept from cankers well there is sixpence to preserue thee Bard. And you do not make him hangd among you the gallowes shall haue wrong Prince And how doth thy master Bardolfe Bard. Well my Lord he heard of your graces comming to towne there 's a letter for you Poynes Deliuerd with good respect and how doth the martlemasse your master Bard. In bodily health sir. Poynes Mary the immortall part needes a phisitian but that moues not him though that be sicke it dies not Prince I do allow this Wen to be as familiar with me as my dogge and he holds his place for looke you how he writes Poynes Iohn Falstaffe Knight euery man must know that as oft as he has occasion to name himselfe euen like those that are kin to the King for they neuer pricke their finger but they saye there 's some of the Kings bloud spilt how comes that saies he that takes vppon him not to conceiue the answer is as ready as a borowed cap I am the Kings poore cosin sir. Prince Nay they will be kin to vs or they will fetch it from Iaphet but the letter Sir Iohn Falstaffe knight to the sonne of the king nearest his father Harry prince of Wales greeting Poynes Why this is a certificate Prince Peace I will imitate the honourable Romanes in breuitie Poynes He sure meanes breuity in breath short winded I commend mee to thee I commend thee and I leaue thee be not too familiar with Poynes for he misuses thy fauours so much that he sweares thou art to mary his sister Nel repent at idle times as thou maist and so farwel Thine by yea and no which is as much as to say as thou vsest him Iacke Falstaffe with my family Iohn with my brothers and sisters and sir Iohn with all Europe Poynes My Lord I le steep this letter in sacke and make him eate it Prince That 's to make him eate twenty of his words but do you vse me thus Ned must I marrie your sister Poynes God send the wench no worse fortune but I never said so Prince Wel thus we play the fooles with the time and the spirits of the wise sit in the clowdes and mocke vs is your master here
in London Bard. Yea my Lord. Prince Where sups he doth the old boare feede in the old Franke Bard. At the old place my lord in Eastcheape Prince VVhat companie Boy Ephesians my lord of the old church Prince Sup any women with him Boy None my lord but old mistris Quickly and mistris Dol Tere-sheet Prince VVhat Pagan may that be Boy A proper gentlewoman sir and a kinswoman of my masters Prinâ—e Euen such kinne as the parish Heiâ—fors are to the towne â—ull shall we steale vpon them Ned at supper Poynes I am your shadow my Lord I le follow you Prince Sirra you boy and Bardolfe no worde to your master that I am yet come to towne there 's for your silence Bar. I haue no tongue sir. Boy And for mine sir I will gouerne it Prince Fare you well go this Doll Tere-sheete should be some rode Poyns I warrant you as common as the way between S. Albons and London Prince How might we see Falstaffe bestow himself to night in his true colours and not our selues be seene Poynes Put on two letherne ierkins and aprons and waite vpon him at his table as drawers Prince From a god to a bul a heauy descension it was Ioues case from a pince to a prentise a low transformation that shal be mine for in euery thing the purpose must weigh with the folly follow me Ned. exeunt Enter Northumberland his wife and the wife to Harry Percie North. I pray thee louing wife and gentle daughter Giue euen way vnto my rough affaires Put not you on the visage of the times And be like them to Percy troublesome Wife I haue giuen ouer I will speake no more Do what you wil your wisedome be your guide North. Alas sweete wife my honor is at pawne And but my going nothing can redeeme it Kate O yet for Gods sake go not to these wars The time was father that you broke your word When you were more endeere to it then now When your owne Percie when my hearts deere Harry Threw many a Northward looke to see his father Bring vp his powers but he did long in vaine Who then perswaded you to stay at home There were two honors lost yours and your sonnes For yours the God of heauen brighten it For his it stucke vpon him as the sunne In the grey vault of heauen and by his light Did all the Cheualry of England moue To do braue acts he was indeede the glasse Wherein the noble youth did dresse themselues North. Beshrew your heart Faire daughter you do draw my spirites from me With new lamenting ancient ouersights But I must go and meete with danger there Or it will seeke me in an other place And find me worse prouided Wife O flie to Scotland Till that the nobles and the armed commons Haue of their puissance made a little taste Kate If they get ground and vantage of the King Then ioyne you with them like a ribbe of steele To make strength stronger but for al our loues First let them trie themselues so did your sonne He was so suffred so came I a widow And neuer shall haue length of life enough To raine vpon remembrance with mine eies That it may grow and sprout as high as heauen For recordation to my noble husband North. Come come go in with me t is with my mind As with the tide sweld vp vnto his height That makes a stil stand running neither way Faine would I go to meete the Archbishop But many thousand reasons hold me backe I will resolue for Scotland there am I Till time and vantage craue my company exeunt Enter a Drawer or two Francis What the diuel hast thou brought there apple Iohns thou knowest sir Iohn cannot indure an apple Iohn Draw â—as thou saist true the prince once set a dish of apple Iohns before him and tolde him there were fiue more sir Iohns and putting off his hat said I will now take my leaue of these six dâ—ie round old withered Knights it angred him to the heart but he hath forgot that Fran. Why then couer and set them downe and see if thou canst find out Sneakes Noise mistris Tere-sheet would faine heare some musique Dra. Dispatch the roome where they supt is too hot thei le come in straight Frâ—ncis Sirra here wil be the prince and master Poynes anon and they will put on two of our ierkins and aprons and sir Iohn must not know of it Bardolfe hath brought word Enter Will. Dra. By the mas here will be old vtis it wil be an excellent stratagem Francis I le see if I can find out Sneake exit Enter mistris Quickly and Doll Tere-sheet Quickly Yfaith sweet heart me thinkes now you are in an excellent good temperalitie Your pulsidge beates as extraordinarily as heart would desire and your colour I warrant you is as red as any rose in good truth law but yfaith you haue drunke too much cannaries and that 's a maruelous searching wine and it perfumes the bloud ere one can say what 's this how do you now Tere. Better then I was hem Qui. Why that 's well said a good heart's worth gold loe here comes sir Iohn enter sir Iohn sir Iohn When Arthur first in court empty the iourdan and was a worthy King how now mistris Doll host Sicke of a calme yea good faith Falst. So is all her sect and they be once in a calme they are sicke Tere. A pox damne you you muddie rascall is that all the comfort you giue me Falst. You make fat rascals mistris Dol. Tere. I make them gluttonie and diseases make I make them not Falst. If the cooke help to make the gluttonie you helpe to make the diseases Doll we catch of you Doll we catch of you graunt that my poore vertue grant that Doll Yea ioy our chaines and our iewels Fa. Your brooches pearles ouches for to serue brauely is to come halting off you know to come off the breach with his pike bent brauely and to surgerie brauely to venture vpon the chargde chambers brauely Doll Hang your selfe you muddie Cunger hang your selfe host By my troth this is the old fashion you two neuer meet but you fall to some discord you are both ygood truth as rew matique as two dry tosts you cannot one beare with anothers coÌ„firmities what the goodyere one must beare that must â—e you you are the weaker vessell as they say the emptier vessel Dorothy Can a weake empty vessell beare such a huge full hogshead there 's a whole marchaÌ„ts venture of Burdeux stuffe in him you haue not seene a hulke better stuft in the hold Come I le be friends with thee iacke thou art going to the wars and whether I shall euer see thee againe or no there is no body cares Enter drawer Dra. Sir Antient pistols belowe and would speake with you Dol Hang him swaggering rascal let him not come hither it is the foule-mouthd'st rogue in England host If he swagger let
thou hast done in a womans peticoate Feeble I will do my good will sir you can haue no more Fal. Well saide good womans tailer well saide couragious Feeble thou wilt be as valiant as the wrathfull doue or most magnanimous mouse pricke the womans tailer wel M. Shallow deepe M. Shallow Feeble I would Wart might haue gone sir. Fal. I would thou wert a mans tailer that thou mightst mend him and make him fit to goe I cannot put him to a priuate souldier that is the leader of so many thousands let that suffice most forcible Feeble Feeble It shall suffice sir. Fal. I am bound to thee reuerend Feeble who is next Shal. Peter Bul-calfe o' th greene Fal. Yea mary le ts see Bul-calfe Bul. Here sir. Eal. Fore God a likely fellow come pricke Bul-calfe til hee roare againe Bul. O Lord good my lord captaine Falst. What dost thou roare before thou art prickt Bul. O Lord sir I am a diseased man Fal. What disease hast thou Bul. A horson cold sir a cough sir which I cought with ringing in the Kings affaires vpon his coronation day sir. Fal. Come thou shalt go to the warres in a gowne we wil haue away thy cold and I wil take such order that thy friendes shal ring for thee Is here all Shal. Here is two more cald then your number you must haue but foure here sir and so I pray you goe in with mee to dinner Fa. Come I wil go drink with you but I caÌ„not tary dinner I am glad to see you by my troth master Shallow Shal. O sir Iohn do you remember since we lay all night in the windmil in saint Georges field Fal. No more of that master Shallow Shal. Ha t was a merry night and is lane Night-worke aliue Falst. She liues master Shallow Shal. She neuer could away with me Fa. Neuer neuer she wold alwaies say she could not abide master Shallow Sha. By the masse I coâ—ld anger her tooâ—th heart she was then a bona roba doth she hold her owne wel Fal. Old old master Shallow Shal. Nay she must be old she cannot chuse but be old certain shee s old had Robin Night-work by old Night-work before I came to Clements inne Scilens That 's fiftie fiue yeare ago Shal. Ha cousen Scilens that thou hadst seene that that this Knight and I haue seene ha sir Iohn said I wel Fal We haue heard the chimes at midnight M. Shallow Sha. That we haue that we haue that we haue in faith sir Iohn we haue our watch-worde was Hemboies come le ts to dinner come le ts to dinner Iesus the daies that wee haue seene come come exeunt Bul. Good maister corporate Bardolfe stand my friend here 's foure Harry tenshillings in french crowns for you in very truth sir I had as liue be hangd sir as go and yet for mine owne part sir I do not care but rather because I am vnwilling and for mine owne part haue a desire to stay with my friends else sir I did not care for mine owne part so much Bard. Go to stand aside Moul. And good M. corporall captaine for my old dames sake stand my friend she has no body to doe any thing about her when I am gone and she is old and cannot helpe her selfe you shall haue forty sir. Bar. Go to stand aside Feeble By my troth I care not a man can die but once we owe God a death I le nere beare a base mind and 't bee my destny so and 't be not so no man's too good to serue's prince and let it go which way it will he that dies this yeere is quit for the next Bar Well said th' art a good fellow Feeble Faith I le beare no base mind Enter Falstaffe and the Iustices Fal. Come sir which men shall I haue Shal. Foure of which you please Bar Sir a word with you I haue three pound to free Mouldy and Bulcalfe Fal. Go to well Shal. Come sir Iohn which foure wil you haue Fal. Do you chuse for me Shal. Mary then Mouldy Bulcalfe Feeble and Sadow Fal. Mouldy and Bulcalfe for you Mouldy stay at home til you are past seruice and for your part Bulcalfe grow til you come vnto it I will none of you Shal. Sir Iohn sir Iohn doe not your selfe wrong they are your likeliest men and I would haue you serude with the best Fal. Wil you tel me master Shallow how to chuse a man care I for the limbe the thewes the stature bulke and big assemblance of a man giue me the spirit M. Shalow here 's Wart you see what a ragged apparance it is a shall charge you and discharge you with the motion of a pewterers hammer come off and on swifter then he that gibbets on the brewers bucket and this same halfe facde fellow Shadow giue me this man he presents no marke to the enemy the fo-man may with as great aime leuel at the edge of a pen-knife and for a retraite how swiftly wil this Feeble the womans Tailer runne off O giue mee the spare men and spare me the great ones putte mee a caliuer into Warts hand Bardolfe Bar. Hold Wart trauers thas thas thas Fal. Come mannage me your caliuer so very wel go to very good exceeding good O giue me alwaies a little leane olde chopt Ballde shot well said yfaith Wart th' art a good scab hold there 's a tester for thee Shal. He is not his crafts-master he doth not do it right I remember at Mile-end-greene when I lay at Clements Inne I was then sir Dagonet in Arthurs show there was a little quiuer fellow and a would mannage you his peece thus and a would about and about and come you in and come you in rah tah tah would a say bounce would a say and away again would a go and againe would a come I shall nere see such a fellow Fal. These fellowes wooll doe well M. Shallow God keep you M. Scilens I will not vse many words with you fare you wel gentlemen both I thank you I must a dosen mile to night Bardolfe giue the souldiers coates Shal. Sir Iohn the Lord blesse you God prosper your affaires God send vs peace at your returne visit our house let our old acquaintance be renewed peraduenture I will with ye to the court Fal. Fore God would you would Shal. Go to I haue spoke at a word God keep you Fal. Fare you well gentle gentlemen exit 〈◊〉 On Bardolfe leade the men away as I returne I will fetch off these iustices I do see the bottome of iustice Shallow Lord Lord how subiect we old men are to this vice of lying this same staru'd iustice hath done nothing but prate to me of the wildnesse of his youth and the feates he hath done about Turne-bull street and euery third word a lie dewer paid to the hearâ—r then the Turkes tribute I doe remember him at Clements Inne like a man made after supper of a cheese