beat amongst you Whoore I le tell you what you thin man in a censor I will haue you as soundly swingde for this you blew bottle rogue you filthy famisht correctioner if you be not swingde I le forsweare halfe kirtles Sinck Come come you shee Knight-arrant come Host. O God that right should thus ouercom might wel of sufferance comes â—ase Whoore Come you rogue come bring me to a iustice Host. I come you starude blood-hound Whoore Goodman death goodman bones Host. Thou Atomy thou Whoore Come you thinne thing come you rascall Sinck Very well Enter strewers of rushes 1 More rushes more rushes 2 The trumpets haue sounded twice 3 T will be two a clocke ere they come from the coronation dispatch dispatch Trumpets sound and the King and his traine passe ouer the stage after them enter Falstaffe Shallow Pistol Bardolfe and the Boy Falst. Stand heere by me maister Shallow I will make the King doe you grace I will leere vpon him as a comes by and do but marke the countenaunce that he will giue me Pist. God blesse thy lungs good Knight Falst. Come heere Pistoll stand behinde mee O if I had had time to haue made new liueries I woulde haue bestowed the thousand pound I borrowed of you but t is no matter this poore shew doth better this doth inferre the zeale I had to seâ— him Pist. It doth so Falst. It shewes my earnestnesse of affection Pist. It doth so Falst. My deuotion Pist. It doth it doth it doth Fal. As it were to ride day night and not to deliberate not to remember not to haue pacience to shift me Shal It is best certain but to stand stained with trauaile and sweating with desire to see him thinking of nothing els putting 〈◊〉 affaires else in obliuion as if there were nothing els to bee done but to see him Pist. T is sempâ—r idem for obsque hoc nihil est t is in euery part Shal. T is so indeede Pist. My Knight I will inflame thy noble liuer and make thee rage thy Dol and Helen of thy noble thoughts is in base durance and contagious prison halde thither by most mechanical and durtie hand rowze vp reuenge from Ebon den with fell Alectoesnake for Doll is in Pistoll speakes nought but truth Falst. I will deliuer her Pist. There roared the sea and trumpet Clang or sounds Enter the King and his traine Falst. God saue thy grace King Hall my royall Hall Pist. The heauens thee gard and keep most royal â—mpe of faine Falst. God saue thee my sweet boy King My Lord chiefe iustice speake to that vaine man Iust. Haue you your wits know you what t is you speake Falst. My King my Ioue I speake to thee my heart King I know thee not old man fall to thy praiers How ill white heires becomes a foole and iester I haue long dreampt of such a kind of man So surfet-sweld so old and so prophane But being awakt I do despise my dreame Make lesse thy body hence and more thy grace Leaue gourmandizing know the graue doth gape For thee thrice wider then for other men Reply not to me with a foole-borne iest Presume not that I am the thing I was For God doth know so shall the world perceiue That I haue turnd away my former selfe So will I those that kept me company When thou dost heare I am as I haue bin Approch me and thou shalt be as thou wast The tutor and thâ— feeder of my riots Till then I banish thee on paine of death As I haue done the rest of my misleaders Not to come neare our person by ten mile For competence of life I wil allow you That lacke of meanes enforce you not to euills And as we heare you do reforme your selues We will according to your strengths and qualities Giue you aduauncement Be it your charge my lord To see performd the tenure of my word set on Iohn Master Shallow I ow you a thousand pound Shal. Yea mary sir Iohn which I beseech you to let me haue home with me Iohn That can hardly be master Shalow do not you grieue at this I shall be sent for in priuate to him looke you hee must seeme thus to the world feare not your aduauncements I will be the man yet that shal make you great Shal. I cannot perceiue how vnlesse you giue me your dublet and stuffe me out with straw I beseech you good sir Iohn let me haue fiue hundred of my thousand Iohn Sir I will be as good as my worde this that you heard was but a collour Shall A collor that I feare you will die in sir Iohn Iohn Feare no colours go with me to dinner Come lieftenant Pistol come Bardolfe Enter Iustice and prince Iohn I shall be sent for soone at night Iustice Go cary sir Iohn Falstalfe to the Fleet Take all his company along with him Fal. My lord my lord Iust. I cannot now speake I will heare you soone take them away exeunt Pist. Si fortuname tormenta spero contenta Iohn I like this faire proceeding of the Kings He hath intent his wonted followers Shall all be very well prouided for But all are banisht till their conuersations Appeare more wise and modest to the worlde Iust. And so they are Iohn The King hath cald his parlament my lord Iust. He hath Iohn I wil lay ods that ere this yeere expire We beare our ciuil swords and natiue fier As farre as France I heard a bird so sing Whose musique to my thinking pleasde the King Come will you hence Epilogue First my feare then my cursie last my speech My feare is your displeasure my cursy my duty my speech to beg your pardons if you looke for a good speech now you vndo me for what I haue to say is of mine owne making and what indeed I should say wil I doubt proue mine own marring but to the purpose and so to the venture Be it knowne to you as it is very well I was lately here in the end of a displeasing play to pray your patience for it and to promise you a better I meant indeed to pay you with this which if like an il venture it come vnluckily home I breake and you my gentle creditors loose here I promisde you I would be and here I commit my body to your mercies bate me some and I will pay you some and as most debtors do promise you infinitely and so I kneele downe before you but indeed to pray for the Queene If my tongue cannot intreate you to acquit mee will you commaund me to vse my legges And yet that were but light payment to daunce out of your debt but a good conscience will make any possible satisfaction and so woulde I all the Gentlewomen heere haue forgiuen me if the Gentlemen will not then the Gentlemen doe not agree with the Gentlewomen which was neuer seene in such an assemblie One word more I beseech you if you bee not too much cloyd with fatte meate our humble Author will continue the storie with sir Iohn in it and make you merry with faire Katharine of Fraunce where for any thing I knowe Falstaffe shall die of a sweat vnlesse already a be killd with your harde opinions for Olde-castle died Martyre and this is not the man my tongue is weary when my legges are too I wil bid you good night FINIS
of Lancaster against the Archbishop and the Earle of Northumberland Iohn Yea I thanke your prety sweet witte for it but looke you pray all you that kisse my lady Peace at home that our armies ioyne not in a hote day for by the Lord I take but two shirts out with me and I meane not to sweate extraordinarily if it be a hot day I brandish any thing but a bottle I would I might neuer spit white again there is not a dangerous action can peepe out his head but I am thrust vpon it Wel I cannot last euer but it was alway yet the tricke of our English nation if they haue a good thing to make it too common If yee will needs say I am an olde man you should giue me rest I would to God my name were not so terrible to the enemy as it is I were better to be eaten do death with a rust than to be scoured to nothing with perpetuall motion Lord Well be honest be honest and God blesse your expedition Iohn Will your lordship lend me a thousand pound to furnish me forth Lord Not a penny not a penny you are too impatient to beare crosses fare you well commend mee to my coosine Westmerland Iohn If I do fillip me with a three man beetle A man can no more separate age and couetousnesse than a can part yong limbs and lechery but the gowt galles the one and the pox pinches the other and so both the degrees preuent my curses boy Boy Sir Iohn What money is in my purse Boy Seuen groates and two pence Iohn I can get no remedy against this consumption of the purse borrowing onely lingers and lingers it out but the disease is incurable Go beare this letter to my lord of Lancaster this to the Prince this to the Earle of Westmerland and this to olde mistris Vrsula whome I haue weekely sworne to marry since I perceiud the first white haire of my chin about it you know where to finde me a pox of this gowt or a gowt of this pox for the one or the other playes the rogue with my great toe T is no matter if I doe hault I haue the warres for my color and my pension shal seeme the more reasonable a good wit will make vse of any thing I will turne diseases to commoditie Exeunt Enter th' Archbishop Thomas Mowbray Earle Marshall the Lord Hastings Fauconbridge and Bardolfe Bishop Thus haue you heard our cause and knowne our meanes And my most noble friends I pray you al Speake plainely your opinions of our hopes And first Lord Marshall what say you to it Marsh. I well allow the occasion of our armes But gladly would be better satisfied How in our meanes we should aduance ourselues To looke with forehead bold and big enough Vpon the power and puissance of the King Hast. Ou◠〈…〉 musters grow vpon the file To fiue aâ—d tweâ—ty thousand men of choise And our supplies liue largely in the hope Of great Northumberland whose bosome burnes With an incensed fire of iniuries Bard. The question then Lord Hastings standeth thus Whether our present fiue and twentie thousand May hold vp head without Northumberland Hast. With him we may Bard. Yea mary there 's the point But if without him we be thought too feeble My iudgement is we should not step too far Bish. T is very true lord Bardolfe for indeede It was yong Hot-spurs cause at Shrewsbury Bard. It was my Lord who lined himselfe with hope Eating the ayre and promise of supplie Flattring himselfe in proiect of a power Much smaller then the smallest of his thoughts And so with great imagination Proper to mad-men led his powers to death And winking leapt into destruction Hast. But by your leaue it neuer yet did hurt To lay downe likelihoods and formes of hope Bard. We fortifie in paper and in figures Vsing the names of men in steed of men Like on that drawes the model of an house Beyond his power to build it who halfe thorough Giues ore and leaues his part-created cost A naked subiect to the weeping clowdes And waste for churlish winters tyrannie Hast. Grant that our hopes yet likely of faire birth Should be stil borne and that we now possest The vtmost man of expectation I thinke we are so body strong enough Euen as we are to equal with the King Bard. What is the King but â—iue and twenty thousand Hast. To vs no more nay not so much 〈◊〉 Bardolfe For his diuisions as the times do brawle And in three heads one power against the French And one against Glendower perforce a third Must take vp vs so is the vnfirme King In three diuided and his coffers sound With hollow pouertie and emptinesse Bish. That he should draw his seuerall strengths togither And come against vs in full puissance Need not to be dreaded Hast. If he should do so French and Welch he leaues his back vnarmde they baying him at the heeles neuer feare that Bar. Who is it like should leade his forces hither Hast. The Duke of Lancaster and Westmerland Against the Welsh himself and Harry Monmouth But who is substituted against the French I haue no certaine notice Bish. Shall we go draw our numbers and set on Hast. We are Times subiects and Time bids be gone ex Enter Hostesse of the Tauerne and an Officer or two Hostesse Master Phang haue you entred the action Phang It is entred Host. Where 's your yeoman i st a lusty yeoman wil a stand too 't Phang Sirra where 's Snare Host. O Lord I good master Snare Snare Here here Phang Snare we must arest sir Iohn Falstaffe Host. Yea good master Snare I haue entred him and all Snare It may chaunce cost some of vs our liues for he will stabbe Host. Alas the day take heed of him he stabd me in mine owne house most beastly in good faith a cares not what mischiefe he does if his weapon be out he will foyne like any diuell he will spare neither man woman nor child Phang If I can close with him I care not for his thrust Host. No nor I neither le be at your elbow Phang And I but fist him once and a come but within my view Host. I am vndone by his going I warrant you hee s an infinitiue thing vppon my score good maister Phang holde him sure good master Snare let him not scape a comes continually to Pie corner sauing your manhoods to buy a saddle and he is indited to dinner to the Lubbers head in Lumbert streete to master Smooths the silk man I pray you since my exion is entred and my case so openly knowne to the worlde let him be brought in to his answer a hundred marke is a long one for a poore lone woman to beare and I haue borne and borne and borne and haue bin fubd off and fubd off and fubd off from this day to that day that it is a shame to be thought on there is no honesty
take souldiers vp In Counties as you go Falstaffe Will you suppe with mee maister Gower Lord What foolish maister taught you these manners sir Iohn Falstaffe Maister Gower if they become me not hee was a foole that taught them mee this is the right fencing grace my Lord tap for tap and so part faire Lord Now the Lord lighten thee thou art a great foole Enter the Prince Poynes sir sâ—â—â— Russel with other Prince Before God I am exceeding weary Poynes I st come to that I had thought wearines durst not haue attacht one of so hie bloud Prince Faith it does me though it discolors the complexion of my greatnes to acknowledge it doth it not shew vildly in me to desire small beere Poynes Why a Prince should not be so loosely studied as to remember so weake a composition Prince Belike then my appetite was not princely gote for by my troth I do now remember the poor creature smal beere But indeed these humble considerations make me out of loue with my greatnesse What a disgrace is it to mee to remember thy name or to know thy face to morow or to take note how many paire of silke stockings thou hast with these and those that were thy peach colourd once or to beare the inuentorie of thy shirts as one for superfluitie and another for vse But that the Tennis court keeper knows better than I for it is a low eb of linnen with thee when thou keepest not racket there as thou hast not done a great while because the rest of the low Countries haue eate vp thy holland and God knows whether those that bal out the ruines of thy linnen shal inherite his kingdom but the Midwines say the children are not in the fault wherevpon the world increases and kinreds are mightily strengthened Poynes How ill it followes after you haue labored so hard you should talke so ydlely tell me how many good yong princes woulde doe so their fathers being so sicke as yours at this time is Prince Shall I tel thee one thing Poynes Poynes Yes faith and let it be an excellent good thing Prince It shall serue among wittes of no higher breeding then thine Poynes Go to I stand the push of your one thing that you will tell Prince Mary I tell thee it is not meete that I should bee sad now my father is sicke albeit I could tell to thee as to one it pleases me for fault of a better to call my friend I could be sad and sad indeede too Poynes Very hardly vpon such a subiect Prince By this hand thou thinkest me as farre in the diuels booke as thou and Falstaffe for obduracie and persistancie let the end trie the man but I tel thee my heart bleeds inwardly that my father is so sick and keeping such vile company as thou arte hath in reason taken from me all ostentation of sorrowe Poynes The reason Prince What wouldst thou thinke of me if I should weep Poynes I woulde thincke thee a most princely hyprocrite Prince It would bee euery mans thought and thou arte a blessed felow to thinke as euery man thinkes neuer a mans thought in the world keepes the rode way better then thine euerie man would thinke me an hypocrite indeede and what accites your most worshipfull thought to thinke so Poynes Why because you haue been so lewd and so much engraffed to Falstaffe Prince And to thee Poyne By this light I am well spoke on I can heare it with mine owne â—ares the worst that they can say of me is that I am a second brother and that I am a proper fellow of my hands and those two things I confesse I cannot helpe by the masse here comes Bardolâ—e Enter Bardolfe and boy Prince And the boy that I gaue Falstaffe a had him from me Christian and looke if the â—at villaine haue not transformd him Ape Bard. God saue your grace Prince And yours most noble Bardolfe Poynes Come you vertuous asse you bashfull foole must you be blushing wherefore blush you now what a maidenly man at armes are you become i st such a matter to get a pottle-pots maidenhead Boy A calls me enow my Lord through a red lattice and I could discerne no part of his face from the window at last I spied his eies and me thought he had made two holes in the ale wiues petâ—cote and so peept through Prince Has not the boy profited Bard. Away you horson vpright rabble away Boy Away you rascally Altheas dreame away Prince Instruct vs boy what dreame boy Boy Mary my lord Althear dreampt she was deliuered of a firebrand and therefore I call him her dreame Prince A crownes worth of good interpretation there t is boy Poines O that this blossome could be kept from cankers well there is sixpence to preserue thee Bard. And you do not make him hangd among you the gallowes shall haue wrong Prince And how doth thy master Bardolfe Bard. Well my Lord he heard of your graces comming to towne there 's a letter for you Poynes Deliuerd with good respect and how doth the martlemasse your master Bard. In bodily health sir. Poynes Mary the immortall part needes a phisitian but that moues not him though that be sicke it dies not Prince I do allow this Wen to be as familiar with me as my dogge and he holds his place for looke you how he writes Poynes Iohn Falstaffe Knight euery man must know that as oft as he has occasion to name himselfe euen like those that are kin to the King for they neuer pricke their finger but they saye there 's some of the Kings bloud spilt how comes that saies he that takes vppon him not to conceiue the answer is as ready as a borowed cap I am the Kings poore cosin sir. Prince Nay they will be kin to vs or they will fetch it from Iaphet but the letter Sir Iohn Falstaffe knight to the sonne of the king nearest his father Harry prince of Wales greeting Poynes Why this is a certificate Prince Peace I will imitate the honourable Romanes in breuitie Poynes He sure meanes breuity in breath short winded I commend mee to thee I commend thee and I leaue thee be not too familiar with Poynes for he misuses thy fauours so much that he sweares thou art to mary his sister Nel repent at idle times as thou maist and so farwel Thine by yea and no which is as much as to say as thou vsest him Iacke Falstaffe with my family Iohn with my brothers and sisters and sir Iohn with all Europe Poynes My Lord I le steep this letter in sacke and make him eate it Prince That 's to make him eate twenty of his words but do you vse me thus Ned must I marrie your sister Poynes God send the wench no worse fortune but I never said so Prince Wel thus we play the fooles with the time and the spirits of the wise sit in the clowdes and mocke vs is your master here