loued his flocke by which he liued sure thou must needs loue thine for whom thou diedst nor is it likely that thou hast shut vp thy bowells of compassion since thou hast opened so large an entrance for vs in the side of thy Sonne wherein all thy tender bowells of compassion are laied vp and how can our sinnes be aboue thy mercie when thy mercie is aboue all thy workes and and thy workes aboue all others workes nay when our wickedst worke hath something good in it beeing an action and so done by thy vertue but thy least goodnesse hath in it not the least euill beeing like the Author ful of perfection Turne thee therefore O Lord and deliuer my soule O saue me for thy mercies sake Vers. 5. For in death no man will remember thee and who will giue thee thanks in the pit THou O God art the liuing God the God of the Liuing and of the Land of the liuing While we liue we are bound to remember thee though we are worthie to die yet death is not worthy to take away the remembrance of thee Thy glorie and praise ought to be eternal as thou art Let them not perish then O Lord whom thou hast created vnto that end the most excellent ende of all things created How fewe such swans are there O God who sing vnto thee in their death and perishing how fewe that will remember thee with Ionas in the bellie of the whale or with Ioseph in the pit or with Daniel in the liōs den who will not rather with Ezeckiah mourne whē they are to goe downe into the pit and with Iob beeing cast downe curse the day of their birth and shewe themselues almost forgetfull of all thy benefits so farre will they be from giuing of thanks In the pit there is mourning and howling and gnashing of teeth but the voice of the Turtle and the singing of birds is not heard there the ioyfull shout of a King is not heard among them It belongeth vnto the Followers of the Lambe in that euerlasting Sabbath and Iubile to sing perpetuall halleluias and to cast downe their crownes before thy throne and to giue thanks glory and honour vnto him that sitteth therupon and yet it belongeth vnto vs also O Lord in what measure and proportion we are able to doe thy will on earth euen aswell though not so well as it is done in heauen O let not Isaac onely but euen Ismael liue in thy sight let vs sinners also liue and not goe downe altogether into the chambers of death not because we are worthy but to glorifie thy holy name For the confession of Sinners as of thine enemies is most glorious Vers. 6. I am wearie of my groanings euery night wash I my bed and water my couch with teares DId holy David a man after Gods owne heart feele the hand of him whose heart he so wel pleased so angrie with him that euen in the night season when others eyes quietly reposed themselues his flowed so abundantly with teares as if he would haue washed both his eies and bed the places where his Adulterie beganne and ended from the defilement of his sin Oh then why should I be wearie of my groanings For what teares will serue to wash out my Leopard spots or cleanse my Ethiopian hew If I had a fountaine running in my head with Ieremie to make vp lamentations yet weare it all too little but I as if the verie fountaine were dried vp am become harder then the rocke in the wildernesse stricken with Moses rod for that gushed out with abundance of waters whereas I shed no teares when the Lord striketh Thy seruant O Lord is a suiter for euerie plant which thy heauenly Father planteth because it shall neuer be rooted vp againe but let all thy plants O God be watered with the teares of repentance and then they will be fruitfull indeed and bring forth euen an hundred folde They are the most acceptable drinke-offering vnto thee and more pleasing then if riuers of oyle were powred out before thee These doe as it were anew baptise vs in Christ Iesus and wash away the filth of our flesh as the waters of Iordan did Naamans leprosie or as those waters of Bethesda which when they were troubled euery one knew there was an Angel in them and that some cure should presently be wrought No water so precious and of such vertue as teares distilling from a repenting heart it holdeth the next place to the water of life and is as the water powred out vpon Elias sacrifice which was consumed with fire from heauen or as a heauenly dewe retourning thither from whence it fell and falling downe againe in showers of grace and mercie To other men and in other causes teares are like the bitter waters of Marrah but when the children of Israel Gods children drinke thereof they are streight-waies made sweet and pleasant For what if they now sowe in teares they shall hereafter reape in ioy and the eyes of the Spouse that are nowe as doues eies ouer the riuers of water euer mourning and weeping shall hereafter when all teares shall be wiped away from them instead thereof be filled with laughter anointed with the oile of gladnesse aboue all others How oft is it mentioned that the teares of the godly come vp to the Lord beeing onely their propertie whereas al other teares doe descend naturally to moue vpwards tovvards heauen And indeede though the heauens be as moulten brasse these much more powerfull thē the droppes of raine whose often fall doth hollowe peirce the hardest stones would supple and mollifie them We finde in common calamities they moue the most obdurate heart to pittie yea euen to a sympathie in our sorrowes and one enemie forgiues another and relents if he seek it with teares much more will they mooue the Lord to mercie who stiles himselfe the God of pitie and compassion Wherefore Christ professeth himselfe wounded and ouercome with the eies of his spouse No water but the teares of repentance is of force to quench the fierie darts of Sathan and put out the flames of Hell kindled against vs. Therefore I will be no more weary of my groanings but euery night will vvash my bed and vvater my couch vvith my teares Vers. 7. My beautie is gone for verie trouble and worne away because of mine enemies ALl worldly beautie alas is nothing else but vanitie what more goodly then that of the Lillie of the field Salomon is not so glorious yet how soone it vadeth and perisheth but alas the losse of this outward beautie were nothing though the sunne looke vpon mee in the heate of affliction while I keepe thy vineyard I may be blacke but comely but my losse is of that inward beautie wherwith thy Spouse the faithfull soule is all glorious within I know Lord thou hadst once new made mee after the image of thy divine beautie which all the beautie of the world cannot so much
because it was the maner of the Iewish synagogue grounded vpon the example of Ioseph that came to his authoritie and of Dauid that came to his kingdome at those yeares not to professe or teach publikely before that age vndertooke not the charge of a Priest or Prophet till he were thirtie yeares of age as all Comments gather out of Saint Lukes computation Whereupon S. Gregorie makes an excellent collection fitting my purpose Redemptor noster in coelis Doctor Angelorū ante tricennale tempus noluit fieri doctor hominū vt praecipitanti vim saluberrimā timoris incuteret cùm ipse qui labi non poterat perfectae vitae gratiā non nisi perfecta aetate praedicaret whose actions I euer held for instructions and herein his example a perfect lawe in so much that I am emboldened to commence my suit being the like with his in the same tearmes that my Master S. Augustine I meane hath taught and done before me who as Possidorus his scholler witnesseth soone after he was vnexpectedly ordered called by good old Valerius Bishop of Hippo a man of great sanctitie but inferiour in learning to bee his Coadiutor in his Episcopall function for his part out of an admiration and high conceipt of his learning though as himselfe confesseth at that time hee was set to guide the sterne before he knewe how to handle the oare with such incredible vehemencie earnestnesse and importunitie euen with the same that Paul adiureth Timothie before God and beefore the Lord Iesus Christ that shall iudge the quicke and dead at his appearing doth beseech and implore Valerius Obsecro te per veritatem seueritatem Christi per misericordiam iudicium eius per eum qui tantam tibi inspirauit charitatem erga nos and againe ipsam charitatem affectum imploro for which he professeth he had made great suit by friends before time impetrare volui per fratres nunc per has literas volo but what is it that he would buy so dearely with all these importunate praiers a matter surely hee thought highly concerned him and therefore out of his iudgement I haue reason to thinke it also greatly concernes my selfe all is for this in conclusion vt miserearis mei concedas mihi ad hoc negotium quantum rogaui tempus as seemes by the circumstances about a yeares respite S. Augustine might well think this inough for him and hath herein also said enough for me his case being an Idea and sampler of mine owne But least relying vpon bare authorities I incurre Socrates censure of the Sophisters of his time whom because when they knew not how to tell their owne tales they vsed onely to cite others authorities he compared to idiots that making a feast are glad to send for fidlers in because they knowe not otherwise how to entertaine the time with plausible discourse of their owne I wil also interpret his minde and mine in myne owne phrase To vse then a little variation my suite in effect is the same with his to redeeme time or as in some of our stricter colledges wher there is large allowance of al things saue vacant time to borrowe a few dayes and according to that excellent counsell our Sauiour at his departure gaue his Disciples to tarrie at Ierusalem to keep here at the Vniuersitie till I shall finde my selfe indued with power from aboue and furnished with gifts meete for so high a calling least shewing my selfe abroad before riper yeares and endowments sutable some more auncient taxe me as Eliab did Dauid his younger brother Quare veristi ego noui tuam superbiim nequitiam cordis tui since I cannot reply as Dauid did Quid feci nunquid non verbum est Hauing prooued my cause which I hope will prooue allowable tending to no other end but with him who by deliberate delaies staies wearied Hannibal and reestablished the ruinated estate of Rome cunctando rem restituere to strengthen and enable my weaknesse by a little staie that so to passe the Poor Virgil Quātum vertice c. I may according to our Sauiours description of good seed in good ground by taking deeper root bring forth better fruit and hauing according to the first and best course of nature an euening and a morning for my daie an euening for contemplation rest repose and a morning for labour and exercise I may in the one make my waxe and combe and in the other bring honie to the hiue in the one gather my stubble and in the other make vp my full tale of bricke in the one by my priuate meditations as Moses in the wildernesse learne to feed my flocke in the other beeing sent with Moses call the children of Gods spirituall Israel from the flesh-potts of Egypt their concupiscible bodies to the land which flowes with milke and hony from the bondage of their spirituall Pharaoh to the glorious liberty of the sons of God And you seeing the fruits of my labours whome next God I euer willingly remember and thankefully acknowledge both the plantors and waterers thereof may thereby be induced to giue mee your blessing and therewithall your hearty praiers to almightie God that it please him so to encrease in mee his spirituall graces that I may still go forward from grace to grace and from vertue to vertue till I become a perfect man in Christ Iesus His meditation vpon the Calling of the Ministerie at his first institution vnto it I Know my vncleane hands O God are not fit to carrie thy Arke or touch those things that are hallowed and consecrate vnto thee my polluted lippes most vnworthy to take thy name into my mouth What am I that I should speake vnto my Lord by prayer from my selfe and others and yet liue much lesse speak from my Lord by his word vnto others to make them liue in thee yet since it hath pleased thee to call mee standing idle in the market-place and attending the vanities of this world so early into the vinyeard it behooueth mee to labour and willingly to beare the heate of the day and gladly while the light of the Gospel lasteth to doe the worke of my heauenly Father the workes of light It is a burden indeed that I vndergoe but thine O Christ and therefore light and easie it is a yoake but thine and therefore sweete Much more blessed are thine then the Seruants of Salomon much more blessed since in this Ministerie the heauenly Angels are their Seruants not vnto vs not vnto vs Lord but vnto thy name giue the glorie thou art still the same gratious God that shewest grace vnto the humble and callest Publicans and sinners and poore silly soules such as weare thy fishermen vnto thee because thou art able to get thee praise out of the mouthes of verie babes and sucklings and euen of stones to raise thee vp children and with the follie of thine to confound the wisedome of the world
see O make them lampes to burne alwaies before thee in thy Temple willing euen to consume themselues to giue light vnto thy house and readie beeing set on fire as it were in a burnt offering spend themselues for thine and thy Churches seruice and let me the least of them all finde grace with my Lord to see my candle also lightened by the Father of lights and so set it in thy Temple not suffering it at any time to be remooued out of the Candlestick but in thy mercie as thou didst encrease the widowes oile all the time of the famine so also increase thy grace in my lampe that it may with the wise virgins be found burning and shining at the comming forth of the Bridegroome and so I receiued into the rest of my Master Guide the Armie of thy Ministers with thy principall spirit O Lord lead them out of Egypt with a stretched out arme that all the powers of darknesse bandied especially to assault them preuaile not against them It is Sathans desire to grinde and winnowe them to make the watchmen of thy holy city to sleepe that so it may be betraied Out of his hatred to thee he seekes most to persecute these whome thou hast set in thy stead that the light of thy Temple beeing extinguished and put out and their Candlesticks remooued he may walke himselfe in the darke and that their eies beeing darkened the bodie blinded may fall into his pits and snares Thou therfore O God goe forth with our Armies vnto battell the cause is thine set bounds vnto the raging sea that it ouerflow not thy holy Land And now Lord since I am come into thy seruice and haue left all to followe thee let me neuer leaue thee to followe any other thing For as thou couldst neuer haue chosen a worse seruant so shall I neuer find so good a Master or meet with such a seruice it beeing fit onely indeede for thy heauenly Angels but because it hath pleased thee as that King to set earthē vessels among the golden ones of thy Temple therefore as euerie creature euen the silly worme doth striue to doe the seruice in his kind and order so among the vnworthiest of them doe I present my humble seruice vnto thee and knowing not what other thanks to render thee who hast made me fellow-seruant with thy Angels that are ministring spirits sent for the good of thy choosen I will euen render thy grace vnto thy glorie and ioyfully yeeld vp my selfe and my soule which thou hast so graciously accepted vnto the hands of my faithful redeemer there is nothing worthy to haue part with thee nothing shal vsurpe thy right in me or robbe thee of thine honour Though O Lord it is not I that doe or can do thee seruice It is thou that seruest thy selfe by me as by an instrument I haue not so much as moouing of my selfe it is thou that workest in me both the wil and the power I am of my selfe but a iarring instrument quite out of tune it is thou that tunest me and makest what soeuer musique and harmonie is in mee that so I among the rest of the Leuites might with ioy and mirth helpe to bring home thine Arke vnto Hierusalem that is aboue I haue nothing that I can call properly mine owne but my sinnes weakenesse and imperfections and wretchednesse whatsoeuer is else in mee more then these is thine O God of thy free gift and grace and therefore bound vnto thy seruice A meditation vpon the first of the seauen paenitentiall Psalmes of Dauid Psalm 6. vers 1. O Lord rebuke me not in thine Indignation neither chastice mee in thy displeasure I Require not O Lord that thou rebuke mee or chastice mee not at all it beeing the prerogatiue of thy children here in this world to be chastened and punished for their sinnes whereas thou sufferest the wicked without troubling to heape vp wrath against the day of wrath till they haue filled vp the measure of their iniquitie My sinnes I know exact chasticement onely I desire that thou correct mee in thy mercie not in thine anger as a sonne not as a bastard with the correction of thy Israel not with the plagues of Egypt to amendment not destruction to the humbling not the hardening of my heart to my comfort not confusion that thou reaching out thy helping hand as thou didst to Peter when he was sinking I be not ouerwhelmed in the waters of temptation or as the burning bush or three children be not consumed in the fire and furnace of affliction but that they may be to mee as the whale to Ionas not to swallow but to preserue and to my sinnefull soule as salt to tainted flesh to keepe it from putrefaction Set bounds O Lord to the raging seas that they ouerflow not and put thy bridle and hooke into the mouth of the beast that it deuoure not the heart of the Turtle If thou rebuke in thy wrath who can beare it if thine anger be kindled yea but a little who can stand before thee if thou but touch the mountaines must they not smoake for it The least breath of thy displeasure is able to blast all the beautie of the world and as a word of thy mercie made all so a word of thine anger is able to destroie all How glad would they be that beare the insupportable burthen of thine anger if in exchaunge thereof the mountaines would fall vpon them and the hills couer them Oh how light a load are the greatest mountaines in comparison of thy least heauie displeasure At the day of thy wrath the heauens shall be rowled vp as a peece of parchment the starres fall from the firmament the moone be turned into blood and the sunne darkned then Lord who am I withwhom thou shouldst be angrie or what is flesh and blood what seely man that thou shouldest striue with him Turne the edge of thy wrath O Lord against those principalities and powers of darknesse that resist thee from vs poore soules that submit our earthen vessells euen to be broken in peeces by the Potter that made vs. O thou Lion of the Tribe of of Iudah spare them that lie prostrate before thee and pardon vs if not thy punishment yet thine anger then if thou killest vs we shall loue thee and in death it selfe remember thee in the pit giue thee thankes Vers. 2. Haue mercie vpon me Lord for I am weake O Lord heale me for my bones are vexed O God whose mercie is thy greatest glorie and whose glorie and power is most seene in mans weaknesse and frailtie as wherein there is no other power seene let not thy invincible strength striue with so weake an adversarie as an arme of flesh wrastle not O God with thy poore seruant as with Iacob vnlesse as vnto him thou chaunge his name to Israel and giue him the blessing of preuailing with God For O Lord thy yron rodde if it as that of Moses he turned
as shadow but I haue fallen and defaced it that now it cannot be knowne whose image and superscription it is and now that the beautie of my flourishing is gone what remaineth but the old man full of the wrinkles and furrowes and frosts of Winter so exceedingly deformed and so great a malefactor that it is time for him now to die and I may with iustice crie Crucifie him In this is the description of the naturall old man rightly verified in a spirituall sence The Sunne of righteousnesse is darkned in him and the clouds returne after the raine one sinne after an other one miserie after an other the keepers of the house tremble the strong men bowe and they waxe darke that look out of the windowes faith is weake hope fainteth and charitie faileth O graunt O Lord that as the Eagle reneweth her youth I may cast off this old man and put on the new Iesus Christ thine and thy Churches welbeloued whose countenance is all white and ruddie the fairest of ten thousand so exceeding aspectable that it is able to change this vile body whose beautie is quite gone and worn away and make it like his glorious bodie Vers. 8. Away from me all yee that worke vanitie for the Lord hath heard the voice of my weeping BEhold here how the Lord after his whirlewinde that tore all the mountains of pride in me and burst in sunder my heart of rocke commeth at length in the still and soft voice The Lord hath wounded but loe he bindeth vp againe hee hath brought vnto the graue loe hee bringeth backe againe For whē my tongue failed I spake vnto him in the silence of my soule and when my soule fainted mine eies flowed out with teares to speake vnto him and loe he hath answered the request of my heart heard the voice of my weeping Now therefore since the Lord deigneth to come vnto me in his mercie and build vp my ruines and dwell with mee againe what haue I to do with my olde companions the workers of iniquitie shall they and my God keepe together or shall I entertaine my Soueraigne Lord with such houshold seruāts no they shal not enter into my house or come within my roofe Nowe the Sunne is risen it is time these shadowes were parted away For neither can thy light dwell with darkenes nor their works of darknes abide the triall of thy light Therefore away from me both all ye workers and all yee workers of vanitie I knowe Lord there will be a hard parting between my olde pleasures and my old heart the syrens will sing many a sweete song and cast many a faire looke and weepe many a false teare before they will part with me but it is no matter what the Harlots do since thou hast heard the voice of my weeping I haue nothing to doe with the voice of theirs since my voice vttered in the bitternesse of my heart was so well accepted of thee nothing shall henceforth pleasure me but such bitter songs wherewith they are litle acquainted though I cannot cast out these Iebusites but they will still dwell with me yet thorough thy grace I will keepe them in subiection and if they grow insolent in my bodie the temple of thy holy Spirit I wil weep for their sinnes and so crying daily vnto thee with teares for pardon wil make them serue me at the least to draw water for the house of the Lord. O that I could make an integrall separation of my self from them and might not carrie my greatest enemies in my bosome so neere my heart the lusts of it but in stead of that fountaine of death be ioyned vnto the Fountaine of life Christ Iesus in whome there is so vnseparable an vnion betweene God and man that neither death nor hell no not the strongest things of this world weake vnto thee much lesse the weakest the vanities thereof can euer be able to separate vs from thee Vers. 9. The Lord hath heard my petition The Lord will receiue my prayer IT is a great grace of thee O my Lord to suffer dust and ashes to speake vnto thee but it is as common with thee as it is great For thou sufferest many to say vnto thee Lord Lord whome neuerthelesse thou knowest not It is a greater therefore that when we call vpon thee in the time of trouble thou wilt heare vs and yet this also may seeme to be not so singular a mercie for whatsoeuer is spoken shall not he that made the eare heare it but so to heare our praiers as to receiue and grant them and then to heare the crie of our petitions when the lowder crie of our sinnes would drowne their voice this is a goodnes as neere vnto thy nature as it is far from our desert O how vnlike are thy eares that are alwaies open to the request of the poore and needie to those of the deaf Adder that old Serpent that stoppes his eares and is inexorable charme the charmer neuer so sweete how vnlike to vs O Lord that hauing eares yet whē thou callest for our obedience haue none to heare thee where contrariwise thou hauing none when we call to thee inclinest thine eares to heare vs. But certenly O Lord it is impossible that thy iust eares should heare the praiers of such as we are for we know God heareth not sinners True Lord and therefore thou hast got thee new eares and least we should thinke these like thy other hast set them euen vpon our Head Iesus Christ with them thou hearest vs if we speak vnto thee and our words passing through his mouth as how can we speak vnto thee but by our head are set on fire by that Golden censor and like holy incense make a sweet sauour vpon thine Altar So that henceforth though our workes be all like our selues wicked though our rough hands be the hands of Esau yet our voice is Iacobs voice and wee haue got the apparrell of our eldest brother Esau and therefore we know that thou wilt blesse vs we are sure thou wilt heare vs and spare vs though more sinnefull then euer Sodome was What though Abraham Moses and Elias were now liuing and prayed for vs we are sure thou wouldst much lesse heare them for vs then for their and thine owne people of the Iewes yet thou hast heard him for vs and without conditioning as with Abraham for the sparing of Sodome if fiftie twentie or ten iust men were found therein hast spared vs all onely for one iust mans sake In him therefore with boldnesse doe all thy Saints offer vp their golden vyals of odours their prayers before thee For hee onely is worthy to make our prayers well-pleasing vnto thee in whom only thou art well pleased Vers. 10. All mine enemies shall be confounded and sore vexed they shall be turned backe and put to shame suddainely BEhold the bountie and seueritie of God seueritie towards mine enemies that haue fallen bowntie towards mee