sacred Word Would you render your self unfit to receive the Sacrament of his most blessed body and blood If not then mourn but so much as will not hinder any of these and you have leave to mourn as much as you please Stop but here and there is no man will lay any restraints upon you But then how short your mourning must be you will soon guess and the Sun must not go down upon your grief no more than it must upon your wrath But if you take no great care whether you disturb your souls or no then you have most reason to mourn for that carelesness and neglect Go then and bewail your unkindness to God your unthankfulness for his mercies and unbelief of his Gospel for you can never take your hearts in a better time than when they are so sad and inclined to be sorrowfull Tell them that now they are very well disposed for a necessary business and bid them look if there be not something else to bewail that is more considerable Ask thy self hast thou not deserved this and ten times more Wilt thou add another sin when thou shouldst cease all sins Hast thou not been careless of seeking God Hast thou not foolishly wasted thy precious time And art thou not troubled at all for that Yea art thou now impatient as if God dealt hardly with thee And wilt thou spend more time badly when thou art taught by the death of thy dear friend how short it is It is most incongruous thus to bewail the death of a child or acquaintance when thou art like to die thy self both body and soul And when thou hast mourned for thy sins thou wilt be taught thereby how little thou oughtest to mourn for thy losses For even our tears for sin must not be immoderate and therefore much less must we dare to let them flow in abundance for our losses So you know the great Apostle commands the Corinthians to comfort him that had been guilty of a great sin and receive him again into the Church now that he repented left perhaps such an one should be swallowed up with overmuch sorrow 2 Cor. 2.7 I wish all those who are ready to destroy themselves with grief would seriously consider this that we may not over-load our hearts with grief for our sins themselves which are the causes of all other sorrows We cannot please the Devil better than by discontent He would fain oppress every good man with some passion or other let us take heed how we joyn with him against our selves If we have left his service that is enough to provoke him If we have bid defiance to his pleasures this doth incense him and we must expect that he will endeavour to overcome us with griefs The Devil is mad against all good men and therefore let all those who have irritated him against them beware how they now prove cowards and execute his vengeance for him with their own hands Let us take heed as Photius excellently expresseth it lest we be good at stirring up and provoking the envy and rage of our adversary but naught at resisting and overcoming him by patience and perseverance to the end 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 But if we must needs weep for the loss of something here let it be for the afflictions of the people of God Let us mourn to see the Church sit like a widdow in her black garments Let it pitty us to see the blood of Gods servants shed like water upon the ground If our own sins do not trouble us let us weep to see the wickedness of the world and let our eyes run down with tears to think that men do not keep Gods Law Some such channel we should cut for our tears and not let them spend themselves on this fashion about our own personal troubles This is a method both to stop our tears and likewise to make them useful to us while they run It is a way to ease us of our present grief and of all others also We shall exchange that sorrow that would have troubled us for a great deal of joy and comfort Whereas our worldly grief would have left the heart sad this will leave it light and merry III. The life of our Lord Jesus gives us the greatest comfort against death Believe throughly that the Lord Jesus lives and so thou maist both expect a resurrection from the dead and likewise hope for comfort from him when thou art left sad and desolate The body it self doth not die any more than corn doth which dies that it may live and spring up again with large gain and advantage Are we loth to throw the corn into the ground and do we not patiently expect till the harvest comes Why should we then bury our friends with so many tears seeing they are but laid in the Womb of their mother again that by the power of God they may have a better birth The Heathen could say much to comfort themselves but they knew not this comfort for indeed they were rather contented than comforted Those that did think themselves most wise and judged that they had the best supports did only dream that the soul make take another body and shift its place at several times But we know that there will be a time when even our scattered ashes will fly into one anothers embraces again and a new life will breath into our dust and make it stand upon its feet And then in the mean time if our condition be never so sad and we be left at alone why do we not solace our selves in the great compassion of our High Priest who hath a feeling of all our miseries which we endure Can we expect that ever he should love us more than when we are like unto him in sufferings We should be so far from being sad at what befalls us that we should think if our condition was a little worse we should be more dear unto him than now we are when nothing extraordinary is hapned to us No man can be alone as long as he lives who hath said I will not leave you comfortless like fatherless children I will come to you Did not he bid his Disciples to be well content when he himself dyed Did he not leave his peace with them and bid them that their hearts should not be troubled And what is the death of one of our friends to the departure of the best friend to the world that ever was from his little flock of friends Did not Christ know what he said when he was going to die Did he advise them not to be troubled when it was impossible that they should be otherwise And if they were not to be troubled then I am sure we have less reason to be troubled now both because we have a less loss to bewail and we have a stronger and more excellent comfort against our loss Our friends are as much below him as his state in the grave was beneath that to which
If it have any thing to complain of it is only this that it was born And therefore let us be content for it is better perhaps for it and not much the worse for us If we weep so much for an Infant what shall we do for a man Either let us now let down the sluce or else expect that we shall then be drowned If he had lived to be a man it might have done as we do miserably bewail the death of its children And therefore either let us not thus bewail it or else think it happy that it lived not to be so miserable as we think our selves Unreasonable to mourn for one when we have more and both waies our grief will be cured But suppose it be a child of a larger growth whose death extorts these tears from us Yet it is but one and we may have many more remaining Shall we lose all the content of a great many because we suffer the want of one If the life of this one would have pleased us so much then how joyfull should we be in the life of four or five If it be such a grief to lose a child then let us be thankfull that we lie not under the miserable grief of losing them all But if we cannot take this patiently then I doubt we shall run mad with impatience if God should take them all away We must learn to part with more by parting willingly with this one for all must die too Can he bear a stone weight who cannot endure the load of one pound and yet how justly may we fear that all the rest should shortly follow seeing we fret so much at Gods hand in this Suppose that this was the most goodly child yet not fairer sure than all the rest put together Or if he was most beautifull yet some of the others may be more wise If this had all our love then we may learn now how to divide our love equally and take pleasure in loving more If he loved us most then he would have wisht us if he had thought of it not to make our selves miserable by mourning for him Dion Chryst Orat 30. So Charidemus said to his friends when he was a dying It is Gods will that I should die and there can nothing that is hurtfull come from him I am very willing to die and I beseech you believe me in what I say for I have a greater care to speak truth now than any of you can have Grieve not for me for I grieve not do not make your selves miserable for I think not my self to be so 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 As much as ever you are able refrain from all sadness for no sad thing hath befaln me Thus we should say to our friends if we love them and therefore their love to us should not make us sad because they would have all they love to be chearfull If they could tell us their mind they would certainly bid us cease our mourning and therefore let us end it of our own accord Let there be such an harmony still between us in our wills and desires that we may not be wailing and lamenting when they are wishing we may be comforted Or when we may have more But let it be supposed that it is an only child yet are there not many hopes that you may have more who gave you this cannot he give you another hath not he that hath the keyes of the grave the keyes of the womb also If one die then as long as the world lasts another shall be born And if we desire children for the good of the world then so they be born it is no matter by whom But if for our sake then we may have them as well as others though perpetuall grief and sadness you may be sure is not the way to procure them Or if God will give us none then we may adopt one Any child will love us as if it was our own if it know not that it is any bodies else Nay any one will love and serve us for what we have and instead of one we shall have many that will thank us more than he perhaps to be our heirs but if we have nothing then why should we desire children for to leave them miserable but as I said why should we not hope for more and those better than him we lost with this hope David comforted Bathsheba his wife 2. Sam. 12.24 who bare a Jedidiah a man beloved of the Lord. If we count it such a strange thing to die then it should seem it is an ordinary thing to live and so why should we not expect the new life of another But if it be no strange thing to die then as I have said already we may well be comforted Or if we should have no more yet this may be some comfort that then we shall have no more to mourn thus sadly for Yea suppose thou art the last of thy family and name as was the great Scaliger and Lipsius also another excellent Scholar it is no great matter seeing the world is not to last long If thy name must have an end what needest thou to trouble thy self when it ends And if men can think it no harm to suffer their name to die of it self as Scaliger did who would not marry why shouldst thou be troubled if thine perish after due care to preserve and uphold it Or when it is uncertain whether they or none at all be better But then if thou hadst never so many children yet who knows how they may prove If they should be bad then thou thy self wilt say that it had been better they had never been They that thou mournest for because they are dead might have given thee greater cause of mourning if they had lived If the death of a child be sad his wickedness would have been far sadder for that is a worser death He that dies doth trouble his Parents but once but he that is bad is a perpetuall torment to them He that is dead cannot indeed help his Parents but then he doth not hurt them as many a bad one doth For those that are dead we only grieve we do not fear but for those that are bad we fear perpetually and we grieve also yea all the sorrow we now conceive at their death will not equall perhaps the meer fear which we should have had from their infancy lest their life should prove bad It is said in the life of John the Patriarch of Alexandria that a Merchant came to him to pray for a son of his that was at Sea that he might be safe Within a moneth the child dyed and his ship likewise was cast away And when he was much troubled at this double loss he thought one night that he saw the Patriarch standing by his bed and saying to him Thou desiredst me to pray that thy son might be safe and behold now he is safe for he is dead If
he had lived wickedly in his future course then he could not have been safe And besides their badness suppose our children should have died of some infamous and base death this would have troubled us more than death it self Yea some there have been that have sought their Parents death and what a trouble would this have been Some have slain their fathers and others their mothers and who was there left to mourn then If you be affrighted at these strange supposals which sometimes have had a reall truth yet consider once more that if they had not been bad notwithstanding who knows what miseries they might have endured worse than death Can you tell what misfortunes might have befaln them which might have made them wish they had died sooner They are now dead perhaps they have that which afterward they might have desired and not so easily obtained For how many and frequent occasions are there of sorrow here To find a life without Crosses we must seek among them that last but from morn to night And so great are the troubles and anguish which some endure that their life is nothing else but a long continued death Which made one of the Gymnosophists answer Alexander when he askt whether death or life was stronger Life sure for that bears the most evils And suppose he that is dead should not have been miserable yet now he is gone if he might rise again it is likely he would not lest he should know again the fear and the pains of dying He is freed from the vanity and vexation of life and from the terrours and agonies of death He hath left the evils of this world as well as the goods and is out of a capacity of suffering as well as of enjoying any thing here This is one of the comforts I remember which that great Divine Greg. Nazianz. gives his Parents against the loss of his dear Brother Caesarius * Orat. 10. p. 172. edit Paris We are sad to think saith he that Caesarius shall rule and govern no more but let us consider withall that none shall hereafter domineer or tyrannize over him None shall fear or stand in awe of him more but he shall not fear neither the insolencies of a grievous Master who is not worthy perhaps to be a servant He shall heap up no more riches No nor shall he be envyed by others or tormented by his own desires of increasing wealth Hippocrates Galen and all the rest he shall expound no more but he shall not labour under diseases neither no nor bear the burden of other mens miseries He shall demonstrate Euclid Ptolomy and Hero no more but he shall not be vexed neither with the proud Ignorance of empty people Plato and Aristotle and Pyrrho and all their fellows can do him no more credit nor shall he cast in his mind how to dissolve their little subtilties What shall I remember more Those high priz'd things which are so greedily sought by all wife and children he shall have none nor shall he mourn for them or be lamented by them either by leaving them to others or being left himself a monument of calamity All this is true may some say my child is free from all the dangers and miseries of this life but if you knew what a rare Creature it was that I have lost you would allow my continued complaints The Heir of an illustrious House the prop of his Family the Hope of his Country the child of a thousand Prayers and that in the Spring and flowr of his Age. What heart of Adamant would not sympathize with one in this condition Some letters of the Antients on this subject I 'le answer you in the words of a great Friend of the Father now mention'd who is ready to comply with your sorrows if you will be but as forward to receive his consolations I confess saith St. Basil in a letter of his to Nectarius * Epist 188. on this subject that it is impossible to be insensible of your loss There was no body but wisht when he was alive that they had such a Son and when he was dead they wept for him as if he had been their own Nay if we would complain and abandon our selves to weeping for this accident the whole time of our life is not long enough for it If all mankind would groan with us they could not make a lamentation equall to this loss no though they should make a River with their tears The Sun himself if he were sensible would shrink at such a spectacle But if we will let the gift of God which he hath put into our hearts interpose that sober reason which sets a measure to our Souls in prosperity it will suggest many things which we have seen and heard to moderate us in these sad circumstances It will tell us that this life is full of affliction and that all places abound with examples of humane calamities But above all that it is the command of God not to lament the dead in the Faith of Christ because of the hope of the Resurrection and that there are great crowns laid up for great patience If we suffer Reason to sing these things in our eares we may find some moderate end of this evil And therefore I exhort thee as a generous Combatant to fortifie thy self against the heaviness of this stroke and not lie down under the weight of sorrow Being perswaded that though the reasons of Gods dispensations are out of our reach yet we ought intirely to accept that which is ordered by one so wise and loving although it be heavy and grievous to be born For he knows how to appoint to every one what is profitable and why he hath set unequall terms to our life The cause is incomprehensible by us why some are carried away sooner and others tarry longer in this toilsome and miserable life so that we ought in all things to adore his loving kindness and not to take any thing ill at his hands Remembring the great and famous voice of Job who when he heard that his ten children were all struck dead in one moment said The Lord gave the Lord hath taken away as it pleased the Lord so it is come to pass Let us make this admirable language our own They are rewarded with an equall recompence by the just judge who perform the same worthy actions We are not robbed of a child but only have restored him to the lender nor is his life extinct but only translated to a better The earth doth not cover our beloved but Heaven hath received him let us tarry a while and we shall be in his company The distance of time is but short between the arrivall of several travellers to their Inne into which some are already turned others are entring and the rest are making great hast toward it but they shall all come to one end For though some perform the journey sooner yet all are in the same
when he is ignorant of himself There was a Fable among the Heathens which wise men understood to contain in it great Philosophy In the midst of this sad discourse it will please you perhaps if I relate it and it will please you a great deal more for to learn and live by it After Jupiter had made the world he thought that men would not be restrained from sin without rewards and punishments and so he made two great barrels the one full of good things the other full of bad to be sent down among men as there was occasion Pandora being very desirous to know what was in these barrels did one day broach them and all the good things flew out towards heaven and all the bad towards hell Hope only and Fear remained in the bottom of these Casks the former in that of Evil things and the latter in that of Good When this was done Jupiter threw down these empty Tubs to the earth and all mortals ran at the rareness of the sight to see what they could find in them Some looked into the one and some into the other and though both of them were empty yet they thought verily that the one was full of good and the other full of evil And ever since it came to pass that here below we have nothing but a fancy or conceit of Good mixed with fear and jealousie and a meer conceit of Evil with some hope in the compound of it The Morral of it is this That the things of this world are but empty Goods and inconsiderable Evils They are our own opinions that trouble us with the shadow of evil and that flatter us on the other side with a fair shew of Good All substantiall Good is in heaven and all dreadfull misery is in hell If we go to heaven we are well enough whatsoever we lose if we fall into sin and so into hell we cannot be well though we should enjoy all the world and while we stay here below there is no good thing we enjoy but is accompanied with fear and no evil we suffer but is attended with Hope And there is no hope like that which is laid up in Heaven of enjoying a bliss sincere and pure without any allay at all Let us turn our minds then toward these heavenly things which they did but dream of in the dark ages of the world Let us heartily believe the Gospel which hath brought to light eternal life And then we shall think our selves happy enough if we lose not those things and perhaps the death of our friends and such like crosses befall us that we may not lose them The Almighty Goodness draws our thoughts and affections by these means from transitory comforts and calls them up thither where we hope our Friends are arrived See saith he here is your Home here is your resting place here is the immortal Inheritance that never fades away If you love your selves mind the way hither and suffer nothing to turn you out of it Whatsoever cross befalls you take it up and carry it along with you Let it only spur you to make the more hast to Eternal joyes Where when we are once seated aloft amidst those glorious objects which then shall incompass us with what contempt as an ingenious Person * M. Malh to the Princess of Conty speaks shall we look down upon this Morsel of earth which men have divided into so many Kingdoms or upon this drop of water whereof so many Seas are composed How shall we smile to see men so busie about the necessities of a Body to which we no sooner give one thing but it asks another and so disquieted through a weakness of spirit which daily troubles them as to unwish that to day which the day before they wished for Enter if it be possible into these generous thoughts before hand Begin to speak of the World as you will do when you have forsaken it Acknowledge it to be a place where you must daily lose something till you have lost all And by these and the like Meditations let your soul assuredly conceive that having had its Original from Heaven it is one of the number of those which must one day return thither In the mean time when the daies of Mourning come and sorrow will not be denyed its place let me recommend this advice to every man As soon as it is possible II. Our tears should be kept for that which is the cause of death and all our tears Turn thy sorrow for thy friend into sorrow for thy sins Remember that thy tears may be due to some other thing and the cure of that will cure all thy other griefs If thou art not a Christian then it is thy duty to mourn neither for one thing nor other but only to bewail thy self Let the dead bury the dead as our Saviour said do thou presently follow after thy Lord with tears Take no care of funerals think of no earthly thing but only how thou mayest be a Christian And if thou art so then thou oughtest to rejoyce that thy sins are pardoned and that thou hast not the greatest cause of grief and this joy sure will swallow up all thy sorrows There is scarce any thing so considerable in our bodies that is seen as our tears for they are the most notable expressions of what is in our hearts The hands as Ant. Guevara observes do work the feet do walk the tongue speaks but it is the heart only that weeps The eyes are but the spunges of the heart through which its affections are drained and dried up An afflicted heart hath neither hands to labour nor feet to walk nor can it find a tongue to speak but tears are all that it hath to tell you what it wants And therefore we ought to reserve these for some greater thing than our dead friends which our heart ought much to be affected withall As our Saviour said to the women of Jerusalem when he was going to the most cruel sufferings so might our friends say to us when they are a dying Weep not for us but weep for your selves if you be dead while you are alive Mourn more than you do if you have not yet mourned for your sins and amended them But if you have then rejoyce in the favour of God and bless him for his Son Jesus who is better to thee than ten Sons or all thy friends which thou lamentest Are our sins dead as well as our friends have we buried them in the grave of our Lord are we risen again to an heavenly life Let us go then to God and pray to him and praise him and this will give us ease But if we be troubled for sin then sure we shall not add another sin by immoderate sorrow and forgetfulness of Gods goodness If it be sin we hate then bitter complaints and discontents must all be hated Would you indispose your self to pray to praise God and meditate in his