vp priuatly And certainely I offended her at that time which was rare with me for I cal to mind that both the Christmas Lent and Easter Terme following though I came diuers times to her vpon Law busines yet me thought her face and maner was not so cleare and open to me as it was at the first And she did directly charge me that I was absent that day at the Starre-chamber which was very true but I alleaged some indisposition of bodie to excuse it and during all the time aforesaid there was altum silentium from her to me touching my Lord of Essex causes But towardes the end of Easter tearme her Maiestie brake with me and told me that she had found my words true for that the proceeding in the Starre-chamber had done no good but rather kindled factious bruites as she termed them then quenched them and therefore that she was determined now for the satisfaction of the world to proceed against my Lord in the Star-chamber by an information ore tenus and to haue my lord brought to his answer howbeit she said she wold assure me that whatsoeuer the did should be towards my Lord ad castigationem non ad destructionem as indeed she had often repeated the same phrase before whereunto I said to the end vtterly to diuert her Madam if you will haue me speake to you in this argument I must speake to you as Frier Bacons head spake that said first Time is and then Time was and time would neuer be for certainly said I it is now far too late the matter is cold and hath taken too much winde whereat she seemed againe offended and rose from me and that resolutiō for a while continued and after in the beginning of Midsomer terme I attending her and finding her setled in that resolution which I heard of also otherwise she falling vpon the like speech it is true that seeing no other remedie I said to her slightly Why Madame if you will needs haue a proceeding you were best haue it in some such sort as Ouid spake of his mistris Est aliquid luce patente minus to make a counseltable matter of it and there an end which speech againe she seemed to take in il part but yet I thinke it did good at that time and holpe to diuert that course of proceeding by informatiō in the Starre-chamber Neuertheles afterwards it pleased her to make a more solemne matter of the proceeding and some few dayes after when order was giuen that the matter shold be heard at York house before an assembly of Counsellers Peeres and Iudges and some audience of men of qualitie to be admitted and then did some principal Counsellers send for vs of the learned Counsell and notifie her Maiesties pleasure vnto vs saue that it was said to me openly by one of them that her Maiesty was not yet resolued whether she would haue me forborne in the busines or no. And hereupon might arise that other sinister and vntrue speech that I heare is raised of me how I was a suter to bee vsed against my Lord of Essex at that time for it is very true that I that knew well what had passed betweene the Queen and me and what occasion I had giuen her both of distast distrust in crossing her disposition by standing stedfastly for my Lord of Essex suspecting it also to be a stratageme arising from some particular emulation I writ to her two or three words of complement signifying to her Maiestie that if she would be pleased to spare me in my Lord of Essex cause out of the consideration she tooke of my obligation towards him I should reckō it for one of her highest fauors but otherwise desiring her Maiestie to thinke that I knew the degrees of duties and that no particular obligatiō whatsoeuer to any subiect could supplant or weaken that entirenes of dutie that I did owe and beare to her and her seruice this was the goodly sute I made being a respect no mā that had his wittes could haue omitted but neuerthelesse I had a further reach in it for I iudged that dayes worke would be a full period of any bitternesse or harshnes betweene the Queene and my Lord and therefore if I declared my selfe fully according to her mind at that time which could not do my Lord any manner of preiudice I should keepe my credit with her euer after whereby to doe my Lord seruice Hereupon the next news that I heard was that we were all sent for againe and that her Maiesties pleasure was we all should haue parts in the businesse and the Lords falling into distribution of our parts it was allotted to me that I should set foorth some vndutifull cariage of my Lord in giuing occasion and countenance to a seditious Pamphlet as it was tearmed which was dedicated vnto him which was the booke before mentioned of king Henry the fourth Whereupon I replyed to that allotment and said to their Lordships that it was an old matter and had no maner of coherence with the rest of the charge being matters of Ireland and therefore that I hauing bene wronged by bruites before this wold expose me to them more and it would be said I gaue in euidence mine owne tales It was answered againe with good shew that because it was considered how I stood tyed to my Lord of Essex therefore that part was thought fittest for me which did him least hurt for that wheras all the rest was matter of charge and accusation this onely was but matter of caueat and admonition Wherewith though I was in mine owne mind litle satisfied because I knew wel a man were better to be charged with some faults then admonished of some others yet the conclusion binding vpon the Queenes pleasure directly volens nolens I could not auoide that part that was laid vpon me which part if in the deliuerie I did handle not tenderly though no man before me did in so cleare tearmes free my Lord from al disloyaltie as I did that your Lordship knoweth must be ascribed to the superior dutie I did owe to the Queenes fame and and honor in a publike proceeding and partly to the intention I had to vphold my self in credit strength with the Queene the better to be able to do my Lord good offices afterwards for assoone as this day was past I lost no time but the very next day following as I remember I attended her Maiesty fully resolued to try and put in vre my vtmost indeuour so farre as I in my weaknesse could giue furtherance to bring my Lord againe speedily into Court into fauour and knowing as I supposed at least how the Queene was to be vsed I thought that to make her conceiue that the matter went well then was the way to make her leaue off there and I remember wel I said to her you haue now Madame obtained victorie ouer two things which the greatest Princes in the world cannot at
iudge specially if he knew the Queene and do remember those times whether they were not the labours of one that sought to bring the Queene about for my Lord of Essex his good The troth is that the issue of all his dealing grew to this that the Queene by some flacknesse of my Lords as I imagine liked him worse and worse and grew more incensed towards him Then she remembring belike the continuall and incessant and confident speeches and courses that I had held on my Lords side became vtterly alienated from me and for the space of at least three moneths which was betweene Michaelmas and Newyears tide following would not as much as looke on me but turned away frō me with expresse and purpose-like discountenance wheresoeuer she saw me and at such time as I desired to speake with her about Law businesse euer sent me forth very slight refusals insomuch as it is most true that immediatly after Newyeares tide I desired to speake with her and being admitted to her I dealt with her plainely and said Madame I see you withdraw your fauor from me and now I haue lost many friends for your sake I shall leese you too you haue put me like one of those that the Frenchmen call Enfans perdus that serue on foote before horsmen so haue you put me into matters of enuie without place or without strength and I know at Chesse a pawn before the king is euer much plaid vpon a great many loue me not because they thinke I haue bene against my Lord of Essex and you loue me not because you know I haue bene for him yet will I neuer repent me that I haue dealt in simplicitie of heart towards you both without respect of cautions to my selfe and therefore viuus vidensque pereo If I do breake my necke I shall do it in manner as Maister Dorrington did it which walked on the battlements of the Church many daies and tooke a view and suruey where he should fall and so Madame said I I am not so simple but that I take a prospect of mine ouerthrow only I thought I would tell you so much that you may know that it was faith and not folly that brought me into it and so I will pray for you Vpon which speeches of mine vttered with some passion it is true her Maiestie was exceedingly moued and accumulated a number of kind and gracious words vpon me and willed me to rest vpon this Gratia mea sufficit and a number of other sensible and tender words and demonstrations such as more could not be but as touching my Lord of Essex ne verbum quidem Wherupon I departed resting then determined to meddle no more in the matter as that that I saw would ouerthrowe me and not be able to do him any good And thus I made mine owne peace with mine owne confidence it that time and this was the last time I saw her Maiestie before the eight of Februarie which was the day of my Lord of Essex his misfortune After which time for that I performed at the barre in my publike seruice your Lordship knoweth by the rules of dutie that I was to do it honestly and without preuarication but for any putting my selfe into it I protest before God I neuer moued neither the Queene nor any person liuing concerning my being vsed in the seruice either of euidence or examination but it was meerely laid vpon me with the rest of my fellowes And for the time which passed I meane betweene the arraignement and my Lords suffering I well remember I was but once with the Queene at what time though I durst not deale directly for my Lord as things then stood yet generally I did both commend her Maiesties mercie tearming it to her as an excellent balme that did continually distill from her Soueraigne hands and made an excellent odour in the senses of her people and not onely so but I tooke hardinesse to extenuate not the fact for that I durst not but the danger telling her that if some base or cruell minded persons had entred into such an action it might haue caused much bloud and combustion but it appeared well they were such as knew not how to play the malefactors and some other words which I now omit And as for the rest of the cariage of my selfe in that seruice I haue many honorable witnesses that can tell that the next day after my Lords arraignement by my diligence and information touching the qualitie and nature of the offendors sixe of nine were stayed which otherwise had bene attainted I bringing their Lordships letter for their stay after the Iurie was sworne to passe vpon them so neare it went and how carefull I was and made it my part that whosoeuer was in trouble about that matter assoone as euer his case was sufficiently knowne and defined of might not continue in restraint but be set at libertie and many other parts which I am well assured of stood with the dutie of an honest man But indeed I will not deny for the case of Sir Thomas Smith of London the Queene demaunding my opinion of it I told her I thought it was as hard as many of the rest but what was the reason because at that time I had seene only his accusation and had neuer bene present at any examination of his and the matter so standing I had bin very vntrue to my seruice if I had not deliuered that opinion But afterwards vpon a reexamination of some that charged him who weakned their owne testimonie and especially hearing himselfe viua voce I went instantly to the Queene out of the soundnesse of my conscience and not regarding what opinion I had formerly deliuered told her Maiestie I was satisfied and resolued in my conscience that for the reputation of the action the plot was to countenance the action further by him in respect of his place then they had indeed any interest or intelligence with him It is very true also about that time her Maiesty taking a liking of my pen vpon that which I had done before concerning the proceeding at Yorke house and likewise vpon some other declarations which in former times by her appointment I put in writing commaunded me to penne that booke which was published for the better satisfaction of the world which I did but so as neuer Secretarie had more particular and expresse directions and instructions in euery point how to guide my hand in it and not onely so but after that I had made a first draught therof and propounded it to certaine principall Councellers by her Maiesties appointment it was perused weighed censured altered and made almost anew writing according to their Lordshippes better consideration wherein their Lordshippes and my selfe both were as religious and curious of truth as desirous of satisfaction and my selfe indeed gaue only words and forme of stile in pursuing their direction And after it had passed their allowance it was againe exactly perused by the Queen her selfe and some alterations made againe by her appointment nay and after it was set to print the Queene who as your Lordshippe knoweth as she was excellent in great matters so she was exquisite in small and noted that I could not forget my auncient respect to my Lord of Essex in terming him euer My Lord of Essex My Lord of Essex in almost euery page of the booke which she thought not fit but would haue it made Essex or the late Earle of Essex whereupon of force it was printed de noue and the first copies suppressed by her peremptorie commaundement And this my good Lord to my furthest remembrance is all that passed wherein I had part which I haue set downe as neare as I could in the very words and speeches that were vsed not because they are worthie the repetition I mean those of mine owne but to the end your Lordship may liuely and plainly discerne betweene the face of truth and a smooth tale And the rather also because in things that passed a good while since the very wordes and phrases did sometimes bring to my remembrance the matters wherein I report me to your Honourable iudgement whether you do not see the traces of an honest man and had I bene as well beleeued either by the Queene or by my Lord as I was well heard by them both both my Lord had beene fortunate and so had my selfe in his fortune To conclude therfore I humbly pray your Lordshippe to pardon me for troubling you with this long Narration and that you will vouchsafe to hold me in your good opinion till you know I haue deserued or find that I shall deserue the contrarie and euen so I continue At your Lordships Honorable commandements very humbly FINIS
the sharpnesse of their sword and had the naturall and elementall aduantages of woods and bogges and hardnesse of bodies they euer found they had their hands full of them and therefore concluded that going ouer with such expectation as he did and through the curlishnesse of the enterprise not like to answer it would mightily diminish his reputation and many other reasons I vsed so as I am sure I neuer in any thing in my life time dealt with him in like earnestnes by speech by writing and by all the meanes I could deuise For I did as plainely see his ouerthrow chained as it were by destinie to that iourney as it is possible for any man to ground a iudgment vpon future contingents But my Lord howsoeuer his eare was open yet his heart and resolution was shut against that aduice whereby his ruine might haue bin preuēted After my Lords going I saw how true a Prophet I was in regard of the euident alteration which naturally succeeded in the Queens mind and thereupon I was stil in watch to find the best occasion that in the weakenesse of my power I could either take or minister to pull him out of the fire if it had bene possible and not long after me thought I saw some ouerture thereof which I apprehended readily a particularitie I thinke be knowne to very few and the which I do the rather relate to your Lordship because I heare it shold be talked that while my Lord was in Ireland I reuealed some matter against him or I cannot tel what which if it were not a meere slaunder as the rest is but had any though neuer so litle colour was surely vpon this occasion The Queene one day at Nonesuch a litle as I remember before Cuffes coming ouer I attending her shewed a passionate distast of my lords proceedings in Ireland as if they were vnfortunate without iudgement contemptuous and not without some priuate end of his owne and all that might be and was pleased as she spake of it to many that she trusted least so to fall into the like speech with me whereupon I who was still awake and true to my grounds which I thought surest for my Lords good said to this effect Madame I know not the particulars of Estate and I know this that Princes actions must haue no abrupt periods or conclusions but otherwise I would thinke that if you had my Lord of Essex here with a white staffe in his hand as my Lord of Leicester had and continued him still about you for societie to your selfe and for an honour and ornament to your attendance and Court in the eyes of your people and in the eyes of forreine Embassadours then were he in his right element for to discontent him as you do and yet to put armes and power into his hands may be a kind of temptation to make him proue cumbersome and vnruly And therefore if you would imponere bonam clausulam and send for him and satisfie him with honour here neare you if your affaires which as I haue said I am not acquainted with wil permit it I thinke were the best way Which course your Lordship knoweth if it had bene taken then all had bene well and no contempt in my Lords comming ouer nor continuance of these iealousies which that employment of Ireland bred and my Lord here in his former greatnesse Wel the next newes that I heard was that my Lord was come ouer and that he was committed to his chamber for leauing Ireland without the Queenes licence this was at Nonesuch where as my duty was I came to his Lordship and talked with him priuately about a quarter of an houre and he asked mine opinion of the course was taken with him I told him My Lord Nubecula est citò transibit it is but a mist but shall I tell your Lordship it is as mists are if it go vpwards it may haps cause a shower if downewards it will cleare vp And therefore good my Lord carie it so as you take away by all meanes all ombrages and distasts from the Queene and specially if I were worthie to aduise you as I haue bene by your self thought and now your question imports the continuance of that opiniō obserue three points First make not this cessation or peace which is concluded with Tyrone as a seruice wherein you glorie but as a shuffling vp of a prosecution which was not very fortunate Next represent not to the Queene any necessitie of estate whereby as by a coercion or wrench she should think her selfe inforced to send you back into Ireland but leaue it to her Thirdly seeke accesse importunè oportunè seriously sportingly euery way I remember my Lord was willing to heare me but spake very few words shaked his head sometimes as if he thought I was in the wrong but sure I am he did iust cōtrary in euery one of these three points After this during the while since my Lord was committed to my Lord Keepers I came diuers times to the Queene as I had vsed to do about causes of her reuenue and law businesse as is well knowne by reason of which accesses according to the ordinarie charities of Court it was giuē out that I was one of them that incensed the Queene against my Lord of Essex These speeches I cannot tel nor I wil not thinke that they grew any way from her Maiesties owne speeches whose memory I wil euer honour if they did she is with God and miserum est ab illis ledi de quibus non possis quaeri But I must giue this testimonie to my Lord Cecill thát one time in his house at the Sauoy he dealt with me directly and said to me Cousin I heare it but I beleeue it not that you should do some ill office to my Lord of Essex for my part I am meerely passiue and not actiue in this action and I follow the Queene and that heauily and I leaue her not my Lord of Essex is one that in nature I could consent with as well as with any one liuing the Queen indeed is my Soueraigne and I am her creature I may not leese her and the same course I wold wish you to take whereupon I satisfied him how farre I was from any such mind And as sometimes it cometh to passe that mens inclinations are opened more in a toy then in a serious matter A little before that time being about the middle of Michaelmas terme her Maiestie had a purpose to dine at my lodge at Twicknā Parke at which time I had though I professe not to be a Poet prepared a Sonnet directly tending and alluding to draw on her Maiesties reconcilement to my Lord which I remēber also I shewed to a great person one of my Lords nearest friends who commended it this though it be as I said but a toy yet it shewed plainely in what spirit I proceeded and that I was ready not onely to do my Lord good offices
their wils subdue the one is ouer Fame the other is ouer a great mind for surely the world be now I hope reasonably well satisfied and for my Lord he did shew that humiliation towards your Maiestie as I am perswaded he was neuer in his life time more fit for your fauor then he is now therfore if your Maiestie will not marre it by lingring but giue ouer at the best and now you haue made so good a full point receiue him againe with tendernesse I shall then thinke that all that is past is for the best Wherat I remember she took exceeding great contentment and did often iterate and put me in mind that she had euer said that her proceedings should be ad reparationem and not ad ruinam as who saith that now was the time I should well perceiue that that saying of hers should proue true And further she willed me to set downe in writing all that passed that day I obeyed her commandement and within some fewe daies brought her againe the narration which I did reade vnto her at two seuerall after-noones and when I came to that part that set foorth my Lords owne answer which was my principall care I do well beare in mind that she was extraordinarily mooued with it in kindnesse and relenting towards my Lord and told me afterwards speaking how well I had expressed my Lords part that she perceiued old loue would not easily be forgotten wherto I answered suddenly that I hoped she meant that by her selfe But in conclusion I did aduise her that now she had taken a representation of the matter to her selfe that she would let it go no further for Madame said I the fire blazeth well alreadie what should you tumble it and besides it may please you keepe a conuenience with your selfe in this case for since your expresse directiō was there should be no Register nor Clearke to take this sentence nor no record or memoriall made vp of the proceeding why should you now do that popularly which you would not admit to be done iudicially Whereupon she did agree that that writing should be suppressed and I thinke there were not fiue persons that euer saw it But from this time foorth during the whole latter end of that Sommer while the Court was at Nonsuch and Otlands I made it my taske and scope to take and giue occasions for my Lords reintegration in his fortune which my intention I did also signifie to my Lord assoone as euer he was at his libertie whereby I might without perill of the Queenes indignation write to him and hauing receiued from his Lordship a courteous and louing acceptation of my good will and indeuours I did apply it in all my accesses to the Queene which were very many at that time and purposely sought and wrought vppon other variable pretences but onely and chiefly for that purpose And on the other side I did not forbeare to giue my Lord from time to time faithfull aduertisement what I found and what I wished And I drew for him by his appointment some letters to her Maiestie which though I knew well his Lordships gift and stile was farre better then mine owne yet because he required it alleaging that by his long restraint he was growne almost a stranger to the Queens present conceipts I was readie to performe it and sure I am that for the space of sixe weekes or two moneths it prospered so well as I expected continually his restoring to his attendance And I was neuer better welcome to the Queene nor more made of then when I spake fullest and boldest for him in which kind the particulars were exceeding many whereof for an example I wil remember to your Lordship one or two as at one time I cal to mind her Maiestie was speaking of a fellow that vndertook to cure or at least to ease my brother of his goute and asked me how it went forwards and I told her Maiestie that at the first he receiued good by it but after in the course of his cure he found himselfe it a stay or rather worse the Queene said againe I will tell you Bacon the error of it the maner of these Phisitions and especially these Empericks is to continue one kind of medicine which at the first is proper being to draw out the ill humor but after they haue not the discretion to chaunge their medicine but apply still drawing medicines when they shold rather intend to cure and corroborate the part Good Lord Madame said I how wisely and aptly can you speake and discerne of Phisicke ministred to the bodie and consider not that there is the like occasion of Phisicke ministred to the mind as now in the case of my Lord of Essex your Princely word euer was that you intended euer to reforme his mind and not ruine his fortune I know well you cannot but think that you haue drawne the humor sufficiently and therefore it were more then time and it were but for doubt of mortifying or exulcerating that you did apply and minister strength and comfort vnto him for these same gradations of yours are fitter to corrupt then correct any mind of greatnesse And an other time I remember she told me for newes that my Lord had written vnto her some very dutifull letters and that she had bene moued by them and when she tooke it to be the abundance of the heart she found it to be but a preparatiue to a sute for the renewing of his farme of Sweet wines whereunto I replyed O Madame how doth your Maiestie conster of these things as if these two could not stand well together which indeed nature hath planted in all creatures For there are but two sympathies the one towards Perfection the other towards Preseruation That to Perfection as the iron contendeth to the Loadstone that to Preseruation as the vine will creepe towards a stake or prop that stands by it not for any loue to the stake but to vphold it selfe And therefore Madame you must distinguish my Lords desire to do you seruice is as to his perfection that which he thinkes himself to be born for whereas his desire to obtaine this thing of you is but for a sustentation And not to trouble your Lordship with many other particulars like vnto these it was at the selfe same time that I did draw with my Lords priuitie and by his appointment two letters the one written as from my brother the other as an answer returned from my Lord both to be by me in secret maner shewed to the Queene which it pleased my Lord very strangely to mention at the barre the scope of which were but to represent and picture foorth vnto her Maiesty my Lords mind to be such as I knew her Maiestie wold fainest haue had it which letters whosoeuer shall see for they cannot now be retracted or altered being by reason of my brothers or his Lordships seruants deliuerie long since comen into diuerse hands let him