them one and another after a little while he turned in staggering as he went with his Armes stretched out in either hand a Gun As soon as he came in they all sang and rejoyced exceedingly a while And then he opened the Deer-skin made another speech unto which they all assented in a rejoicing manner and so they ended their business and forthwith went to Sudbury fight To my thinking they went without any scruple but that they should prosper and gain the victory And they went out not so rejoycing but they came home with as great a Victory For they said they had killed two Captains and almost an hundred men One English-man they brought along with them and he said it was too true for they had made sad work at Sudbury as indeed it proved Yet they came home without that rejoycing and triumphing over their victory which they were wont to shew at other times but rather like Dogs as they say which have lost their cars Yet I could not pereceive that it was for their own loss of men They said they had not lost above five or six and I missed none excep in one Wigwam When they went they acted as if the Devil had told them that they should gain the victory and now they acted as if the Devil had told them they should have a fall Whither it were so or no I cannot tell but so it proved for quickly they began to fall and so held on that Summer till they came to utter ruine They came home on a Sabbath day and the Powaw that kneeled upon the Deer-skin came home I may say without abule as black as the Devil When my master came home be came to me and bid me make a shirt for his Papoos of a hollandlaced Pillowbeer About that time there came an Indian to me and bid me come to his Wigwam at night and he would give me some Pork Ground nuts Which I did and as I was eating another Indian said to me he seems to be your good Friend but he killed two Englishmen at Sudbury and there ly their Cloaths behind you I looked behind me and there I saw bloody Cloaths with Bullet holes in them yet the Lord suffered not this wretch to do me any hurt Yea instead of that he many times refresht me five or six times did he and his Squaw refresh my feeble carcass If J went to their Wigwam aâ— any time they would alwayes give me something and yet they were strangers that I never saw before Another Squaw gave me a piece of fresh Pork and a little Salt with it and lent me her Panto Fry it in and I cannot but remember what a sweet pleasant and delightfull relish that bit had to me to this day So little do we prize common mercies when we have them to the full The twentieth Remove It was their usual manner to remove when they bad done any mischief lest they should be found out and so they did at this time We went about three or four miles and there they built a great Wigwam big enough to hold an hundred Indians which they did in preparation to a great day of Dancing They would say now amongst themselves that the Governour would be so angry for his loss at Sudbury that he would send no more about the Captives which made me grieve and tremble My Sister being not sar from the place where we now were and hearing that I was here desired her master to let her come and see me and he was willing to it and would go with her but she being ready before him told him she wonld go before and was come within a Mile or two of the place Then he overtook her and began to rant as if he had been mad and made her go back again in the Rain so that I never saw her till j saw her in Charlestown But the Lord requited many of their ill doings for this Indian her Master was hanged afterward at Boston The Indians now began to come from all quarters against their merry dancing day Among some of them came one Good wife Kettle I told her my heart was so heavy that it was ready to break so is mine too said she but yet said I hope we shall hear some good news shortly I could hear how earnestly my Sister desired to see me I as earnestly desired to see her and yet neither of us could get an opportunity My Daughter was also now about a mile off and I had not seen her in nine or ten weeks as I had not seen my Sister since our first taking I earnestly desired them to let me go and see them yea I intreated begged and perswaded them but to let me see my Daughter and yet so hard hearred were they that they would not suffer it They made use of their tyrannical power whilst they had it but through the Lords wonderfull mercy their time was now but short On a Sabbath day the Sun being about an hour high in the afternoon came Mr. John Hoar the Council permitting him and his own foreward spirit inclining him together with the two forementioned Indians Tom and Peter with their third Letter from the Council When they came near I was abroad though I saw them not they presently called me in and bade me sit down and not stir Then they catched up their Guns and away they ran as if an Enemy had been at hand and the Guns went off apace I manifested some great trouble and they asked me what was the matter I told them I thought they had killed the English-man for they had in the mean time informed me that an English-man was come they said No They shot over his Horse and under and before his Horse and they pusht him this way and that way at their pleasure shewing what they conld do Then they let them come to their Wigwams I begged of them to let me see the English man but they would not But there was I fain to sit their pleasure When they had talked their fill with him they suffered me to go to him We asked each other of our welfare and how my Husband did and all my Friends He told me they were all well and would be glad to see me Amongst other things which my Husband sent me there came a pound of Tobacco which I sold for nine shillings in Money for many of the Indians for want of Tobacco smoaked Hemlock and Ground-Ivy it was a great mistake in any who thought I sent for Tobacco for through the savour of God that desire was overcome I now asked them whither I should go home with Mr. Hoar They answered No one and another of them and it being night we lay down with that answer in the morning Mr Hoar invited the Saggamores to Dinner but when we went to get it ready we fond that they had stollen the greatest part of the Provision Mr. Hoar had brought our of his Bags in the night And we may see
the Indians told me they would kill him as he came homeward my Children gone my Relations and Friends gone our House and home and all our comforts within door and without all was gone except my life and I knew not but the next moment that might go too There remained nothing to me but one poor wounded 〈◊〉 and it seemed at present worse than death that it was in such a pitiful condition bespeaking Compassion and I had an refreshing for it nor suitable things to revive it Little do many think what is the savageness and bruitishness of this barbarous Enemy even those that seem to profess more than others among them when the English have fallen into their hands Those seven that were killed at Lancaster the summer before upon a Sabbath day and the one that was afterward killed upon a week day were stain and mangled in a barbarous manner by one-ey'd John and Marlborough's Praying Indians which Capt. Mosely brought to Boston as the Indians told me The second Remove But now the next morning I must turn my back upon the Town and travel with them into the vast and isolate Wilderness I knew not whether It is not 〈◊〉 tongue or pen can express the sorrows of my heart and bitterness of my spirit that I had at this departure but God was with me in a wonderfull manner carrying me along and bearing up my spirit that it did not quite fail One of the indians carried my poor wounded Babe upon a horse it went moaning all along I shall dy I shall dy 〈◊〉 went on foot after it with sorrow that cannot be exprest At length I took it off the horse and â—â—â—â—ed it in my armes till my strength sailed and I fell down with it Then they set me upon a horse with my wounded Child in my lap and there being no furnitunre upon the horse back as we were going down a steep hill we both fell over the horses head at which they like inhumane creatures laught and rejoyced to see it though I thought we should there have ended our dayes as overcome with so many difficulties But the Lord renewed my strength still and carried me along that I might see more of his Power yea so much that I could never have thought of had I not experienced it After this it quickly began to snow and when night came on they stopt and now down I must sit in the snow by a little fire and a few boughs behind me with my sick Child in my lap and calling much for water being now through the wound fallen into a violent Fever My own wound also growing so stiff that I could scarce sit down or rise up yet so it must be that I must sit all this cold winter night upon the cold snowy ground with my sick Child in my armes looking that every hour would be the last of its life and having no Christian friend near me either to comfort or help me Oh I may see the wonderfull power of God that my Spirit did not utterly sink under my affliction still the Lord upheld me with his gracious and mercifull Spirit and we were both alive to see the light of the next morning The third remove The morning being come they prepared to go their way One of the Indians got up upon a horse and they set me up behind him with my poor sick Babe in my lap A very wearisome and tedious day I had of it what with my own wound and my Childs being so exceeding sick and in a lamentable condition with her wound It may be easily judged what a poor feeble condition we were in there being not the least crumb of refreshing that came within either of our mouths from Wednesday night to Saturday night except only a little cold water This day in the afternoon about an hour by Sun we came to the place where they intendded viz. an Indian Town called Wenimesset Norward of Quabaug When we were come Oh the number of Pagans now merciless enemies that there came about me that I may say as David Psal 27.13 I had fainted unless I had believed c. The next day was the Sabbath I then remembred how careless I had been of Gods holy time how many Sabbaths I had lost and mispent and how evily I had walked in Gods sight which lay so closs unto my spirit that it was easie for me to see how righteous it was with God to cut off the threed of my life and cast me out of his presence for ever Yet the Lord still shewed mercy to me and upheld me and as he wounded me with one hand so he healed me with the other This day there came to me one Robbert Pepper a man belonging to Roxbury who was taken in Captain Beers his Fight and had been now a considerable time with the Indians and up with them almost as far as Albany to see king Philip as he told me and was now very lately come into these parts Hearing I say that I was in this Indian Town he obtained leave to come and see me He told me he himself was wounded in the leg at Captain Beers his Fight and was not able some time to go but as they carried him and as he took Oaken leaves and laid to his wound and through the blessing of God he was able to travel again Then I took Oaken leaves and laid to my side and with the blessing of God it cured me also yet before the cure was wrought I may say as it is in Psal 38.5 6. My wounds stink and are corrupt I am troubled I am bowed down greatly I go mourning all the day long I sat much alone with a poor wounded Child in my lap which moaned night and day having nothing to revive the body or cheer the spirits of her but in stead of that sometimes one Indian would come and tell me one hour that your Master will knock your Child in the head and then a second and then a third your Master will quickly knock your Child in the head This was the comfort I had from them miserable comforters are ye all as he said Thus nine dayes I sat upon my knees with my Babe in my lap till my flesh was raw again my Child being even ready to depart this sorrowfull world they bade me carry it out to another Wigwam I suppose because they would not be troubled with such spectacles Whither I went with a very heavy heart and down I sat with the picture of death in my lap About two houtes in the night my sweet Babe like a Lambe departed this life on Feb. 18. 1675. It being about six yeares and five months old It was nine dayes from the first wounding in this miserable condition without any refreshing of one nature or other except a little cold water I cannot but take notice how at another time I could not bear to be in the room where any dead person was but now the case is changed I must
read we opened the Bible and lighted on Psal 27. in which Psalm we especially took notice of that ver alt Wait no the Lord Be of good courage and he shall strengthen thine Heart wait I say on the Lord. The fourth Remove And now I must part with that little Company I had Here I parted from my Daughter Mary whom I never saw again till I saw her in Dorcester returned from Captivity and from four little Cousins and Neighbours some of which I never saw afterward the Lord only knows the end of them Amongst them also was that poor Woman before mentioned who came to a sad end as some of the company told me in my travel She having much grief upon her Spirit about her miserable condition being so near her time she would be often asking the Indians to let her go home they not being willing to that and yet vexed with her importunity gathered a great company together about her and stript her naked and set her in the midst of them and when they had sung and danced about her in their hellish manner as long as they pleased they knockt her on head and the child in her arms with her when they had done that they made a fire and put them both into it and told the other Children that were with them that if they attempted to go home they would serve them in like manner The Children said she did not shed one tear but prayed all the while But to return to my own Journey we travelled about half a day or little more and came to a desolate place in the Wilderness where there were no Wigwams or Inhabitants before we came about the middle of the afternoon to this place cold and wet and snowy and hungry and weary and no refreshing for man but the cold ground to sit on and our poor Indian cheer Heart-aking thoughts here I had about my poor Children who were scattered up and down among the wild beasts of the forrest My head was light dissey either through hunger or hard lodging or trouble or altogether my knees feeble my body raw by sitting double night and day that I cannot express to man the affliction that lay upon my Spirit but the Lord helped me at that time to express it to himself I opened my Bible to read and the Lord brought that precious Scripture to me Jer. 31.16 Thus saith the Lord refrain thy voice from weeping and thine eyes from tears for thy work shall be rewarded and they shall come again from the land of the Enemy This was a sweet Cordial to me when I sat down and weept sweetly over this Scripture At this place we continued about four dayes The fifth Remove The occasion as I thought of their moving at this time was the English Army it being near and following them For they went as if they had gone for their lives for some considerable way and then they made a stop and chose some of their stoutest men and sent them back to hold the English Army in play whilst the rest escaped And then like Jehu they marched on furiously with their old and with their young some carried their old decrepit mothers some carried one and some another Four of them carried a great Indian upon a Bier but going through a thick Wood with him they were hindred and could make no hast whereupon they took him upon their backs and carried him one at a time till they came to Bacquaug River Upon a Friday a little after noon we came to this River When all the company was come up and were gathered together I thought to count the number of them but they were so many and being somewhat in motion it was beyond my skil In this travel because of my wound I was somewhat favoured in my load I carried only my knitting work and two quarts of parched meal Being very faint I asked my mistriss to give me one spoonfull of the meal but she would not give me a taste They quickly sell to cutting dry trees to make Rafts to carry them over the river and soon my turn came to go over By the advantage of some brush which they had laid upon the Raft to sit upon I did not wet my foot which many of themselves at the other end were mid-leg deep which cannot but be acknowledged as a favour of God to my weakned body it being a very cold time I was not before acquainted with such kind of doings or dangers When thou passst through the water I will be with thee and through the Rivers thâ—◠〈◊〉 overflow thee Isai 43.2 A certain number of us got over the River that night but it was the night after the Sabbath before all the company was got over On the Saturday they boyled an old Horses leg which they had got and so we drank of the broth â—s soon as they thought it was ready and when it 〈◊〉 almost all gone they filled it up again The first week of my being among them I hardly ate any thing the second week I found my stomach grow very faint for want of something and yet it was very hard to get down their filthy trash but the third week though I could think how formerly my stomach would turn against this or that and I could starve and dy before I could eat such things yet they were sweet and savoury to my taste I was at this time knitting a pair of white cotton stockins for my mistriss and had not yet wrought upon a Sabbath day when the Sabbath came they bade me go to work I told them it was the Sabbath-day and desired them to let me rest and told them I would do as much more to morrow to which they answered me they would break my face And here I cannot but take notice of the strange providence of God in preserving the heathen They were many hundreds old and young some sick and some lame many had Papooses at their backs the greatest number at this time with us were Squams and they travelled with all they had bag and baggage and yet they got over this River aforesaid and on Munday they set their Wigwams on fire and away they went On that very day came the English Army after them to this River and saw the smoak of their Wigwams and yet this River put a stop to them God did not give them courage or activity to go over after us we were not ready for so great a mercy as victory and deliverance if we had been God would have sound out a way for the English to have passed this River as well as for the Indians with their Squaws and Children and all their Luggage Oh that my People had hearkened to me and Israel had walked in my ways I should soon have subdued their Enemies and turned my hand against their Adversaries Psal 81.13.14 The sixth Remove On Munday as I said they set their Wigwams on fire and went away It was a cold morning
occasions I hope it is not too much to say with Job Have pitty upon me have pitty upon me O ye my Friends for the Hand of the Lord has touched me And here I cannot but remember how many times sitting in their Wigwams and musing on things past I should suddenly leap up and run out as if I had been at home forgetting where I was and what my condition was But when I was without and saw nothing but Wilderness and Woods and a company of barbarous heathens my mind quickly returned to me which made me think of that spoken concerning Sampson who said I will go out and shake myself as at other times but he wist not that the Lord was departed from him About this time I began to think that all my hopes of Restoration would come to nothing I thought of the English Army and hoped for their coming and being taken by them but that failed I hoped to be carried to Albany at the Indians had discoursed before but that failed also I thought of being sold to my Husband as my master spake but in stead of that my master himself was gone and j left behind so that my Spirit was now quite réady to sink J asked them to let me go out and pick up some sticks that j might get alone And poure out my heart unto the Lord. Then also j took my Bible to read but j found no comfort here neither which many times j was went to find So easie a thing it is with God to dry up the Streames of Scripture-comfort from us Yet j can say that in all my sorrows and afflictions God did not leave me to have my impatience work towards himself as if his wayes were unrighteous But I knew that he laid upon me less then j deserved Afterward before this dolefull time ended with me I was turning the leaves of my Bible and the Lord brought to me some Scriptures which did a little revive me as that Isai 55.8 For my thoughts are not your thougts neither are your wayes my ways saith the Lord. And also that Psal 37.5 Commit thy way unto the Lord trust also in him and he shal bring it to pass About this time they came yelping from Hadly where they had killed three English men and brought one Captive with them viz. Thomas Read They all gathered about the poor Man asking him many Questions I desired-also to go and see him and when I came he was crying bitterly supposing they would quickly kill him Whereupon j asked one of them whether they intended to kill him he answered me they would not He being a little cheared with that I asked him about the wel-fare of my Husthand he told me he saw him such a time in the Bay and he was well but very melancholly By which I certainly understood though I suspected it before that whatsoever the Indians told me respecting him was vanity and lies Some of them told me he was dead and they had killed him some said he was Married again and that the Governour wished him to Marry and told him he should have his choice and that all perswaded I was dead So like were these barbarous creatures to him who was a lyar from the beginning As I was sitting once in the Wigwam here Phillps Maid came in with the Child in her arms and asked me to give het a piece of my Apron to make a flap for it I told her I would not then my Mist riss bad me give it but still I said no the maid told me if I would not give her a piece she would tear a piece off it I told her I would tear her Coat then with that my Mistriss rises up and takes up a stick big enough to have killed me and struck at me with it but J stept out and she struck the stick into the Mat of the Wigwam But while she was pulling of it out j ran to the Maid and gave her all my Apron and so that storm went over Hearing that my Son was come to this place I went to see him and told him his Father was well but very melancholly he told me he was as much grieved for his Father as for himself I wondred at his speech for I thought I had enough upon my spirit in reference to my self to make me mindless of my Husband and every one else they being safe among their Friends He told me also that a while before his Master together with other Indians where going to the French for Powder but by the way the Mohawks met with them and killed four of their Company which made the rest turn back again for which I desire that myself and he may bless the Lord for it might have been worse with him had he been sold to the French than it proved to be in his remaining with the Indians I went to see an English Youth in this place one John Gilberd of Spring field J found him lying without dores upon to ground j asked him how he did he told me he was very sick of a flux with eating so much blood They had turned him out of the Wigwam and with him an indian Papoos almost dead whose Parents had been killed in a bitter cold day without fire or clothes the young man himself had nothing on but his shirt wastcoat This sight was enough to melt a heart of flint There they lay quivering in the Cold the youth round like a dog the Papoos stretcht out with his eyes and nose and mouth full of dirt and yet alive and groaning j advised John to go and get to some fire he told me he could not stand but ◠perswaded him still left he shouldly there and die and with much adoe j got him to a fire and went my self home As soon as j was got home his Masters Daughter came after me to know what j had done with the English man j told her j had got him to a fire in such a place Now had j need to pray Pauls Prayer 2 Thess 3.2 That we may be delivered from unreasonable and wicked men For her satisfaction j went along with her and brought her to him but before j got home again it was noised about that j was running away and getting the English youth along with me that as soon as I came in they began to rant and domineer asking me where j had been and what j had been doing and saying they would knock him on the head I told them j had been seeing the English Youth and that I would not run away they told me I lyed and taking up a Hatchet they came to me and said they would knock me down if I stirred out again and so confined me to the Wigwam Now may J say with David 2 Sam. 24.14 I am in a great strait If I keep in I must dy with hunger and if I go out I must be knockt in head This distressed condition held that day and half the next And then the Lord
remembred me whose mercyes are great Then came an Indian to me with a pair of stockings that were too big for him and he would have me ravel them out and knit them fit for him I shewed my self willing and bid him ask my mistriss if I might go along with him a little way she said yes J might but J was not a little refresht with that news that J had my liberty again Then J went along with him and he gave me some roasted Ground-nuts which did again revive my feeble stomach Being got out of her sight J had time and liberty again to look into my Bible Which was my Guid by day and my Pillow by night Now that comfortable Scripture presonted it self to me Isa 54.7 For a smal moment have I forsaken thee but with great mercies will I gather thee Thus the Lord carried me along from one time to another and made good to me this precious promise and many others Then my Son came to see me and J asked his master to let him stay a while with me that J might comb his head and look over him for he was almost over come with lice He told me when I had done that he was very hungry but I had nothing to relieve him but bid him go into the Wigwams as he went along and see if he could get any thing among them Which he did and it seemes tarried a little too long for his Master was angry with him and beat him and then sold him Then he came running to tell me he had a new Master and that he had given him some Groundouts already Then I went along with him to his new Master who told me he loved him and he should not want So his Master carried him away j never saw him afterward till j saw him at Pascataqua in Portsmouth That night they bade me go out of the Wigwam again my Mistrisses Papoos was sick and it died that night and there was one benefit in it that there was more room J went to a Wigwam and they bade me come in and gave me a skin to ly upon and a mess of Venson and Ground-nuts which was a choice Dish among them On the morrow they burried the Papoos and afterward both morning and evening there came a company to mourn and howle with her though j confess j could not much condole with them Many sorrowfull dayes j had in this place often getting alone like a Crane or a Swallow so did I chatter I did mourn as a Dove mine eyes fail with looking upward Oh Lord j am oppressed undertake for me Isa 38 14 I could tell the Lord as Hezeakiah ver 3. Remember now O Lord I beseech thee kow I have walked before thee in truth Now had I time to examine al my wayes my Conscience did not accuse me of un-righteousness toward one or other yet I saw how in m y walk with God I had been a careless creature As David said Against thee thee only have I sinned I might say with the poor Publican God be mereiful unto me a sinner On the Sabbath-dayes I could look upon the Sun and think how People were going to the house of God to have their Souls refresht then home and their bodies also but I was destitute of both might say as the poor Prodigal he would fain have filled his belly with the husks that the Swine did eat and no man gave unto him Luke 15.16 For I must say with him Father I have sinned against Heaven and in thy sight ver 21. I remembred how on the night before after the Sabbath when my Family was about me and Relations and Neighbours with us we could pray and sing and then refresh our bodies with the good creatures of God and then have a comfortable Bed to ly down on but in stead of all this I had only a little Swill for the body and then like a Swine must ly down on the ground I cannot express to man the sorrow that lay upon my Spirit the Lord knows it Yet that comfortable Scripture would often come to my mind For a small moment have I forsaken thee but with great mercies will I gather thee The fourteenth Remove Now must we pack up and be gone from this Thicket bending our course toward the Bay-towns I haveing nothing to eat by the way this day but a few crumbs of Cake that an Indian gave my girle the same day we were taken She gave it me and I put it in my pocket there it lay till it was so mouldy for want of good baking that one could not tell what it was made of it fell all to crumbs grew so dry and hard that it was like little flints this refreshed me many times when I was ready to faint It was in my thoughts when I put it into my mouth that if ever I returned I would tell the World what a blessing the Lord gave to such mean sood As we went along they killed a Deer with a young one in her they gave me a piece of the Fawn and it was so young and tender that one might eat the bones as well as the flesh and yet I thought it very good When night came on we sate down it rained but they quickly got up a Bark Wigwam where I lay dry that night I looked out in the morning and many of them had line in the rain all night I saw by their Reaking Thus the Lord dealt mercifully with me many times and I fared better than many of them In the morning they took the blood of the Deer and put it into the Paunch and so boyled 〈◊〉 I could eat nothing of that though they ate it â—weâ—â—tly And yet they were so nice in other things that when I had fetcht water and had put the Dish I dipt the water with into the Kettle of water which I brought they would say they would knock me down for they said it was a sluttish trick The fifteenth Remove We went on our Travel I having got one handfull of Ground-nuts for my support that day they gave me my load and j went on cheerfully with the thoughts of going homeward haveing my burden more on my back than my spirit we came to Baquang River again that day near which we abode a few dayes Sometimes one of them would give me a Pipe another a little Tobacco another a little Salt which I would change for a little Victuals I cannot but think what a Wolvish appetite persons have in a starving condition for many times when they gave me that which was hot I was so greedy that I should burn my mouth that it would trouble me hours after and yet I should quickly do the same again And after I was thorougly hungry I was never again satisfied For though sometimes it fell out that I got enough and did eat till I could eat no more yet I was as unsatisfied as J was when I began And now could
J see that Scripture verified there being many Scriptures which we do not take notice of or understand till we are affli ed Mic. 6.14 Thou shalt eat and not be satisfied Now might I see more than ever before the miseries that sin hath brought upon us Many times I should be ready to run out against the Heathen but the Scripture would quiet me again Amos 3 6. Shal there be evil in the City and the Lord hath not done it The Lord help me to make a right improvment of His Word and that I might learn that great lesson Mic. 6.8 9. He hath shewed thee Oh Man what is good and what doth the Lord require of thee but to do justly and love mercy and walk humbly with thy God Hear ye the rod and who hath appointed it The sixteenth Remove We began this Remove with wading over Baquag River the water was up to the knees and the stream very swift and so cold that I thought it would have cut me in sunder j was so weak and seeble that j reeled as I went along and thought there I must end my dayes at last after my bearing and getting thorough so many difficulties the Indians stood laughing to see me staggering along but in my distress the Lord gave me experience of the truth and goodness of that promise Isai 43.2 When thou passest thorough the Waters I will be with thee and through the Rivers they shall not overflow thee Then I sat down to put on my stockins and shoos with the teares running down mine eyes and many sorrowfull thoughts in my heart but I gat up to go along with them Quickly there came up to us an Indian who informed them that I must go to Wachuset to my master for there was a Letter come from the Council to the Saggamores about redeeming the Captives and that there would be another in fourteen dayes and that I must be there ready My heart was so heavy before that I could scarce speak or go in the path and yet now so light that J could run My strength seemed to come again and recruit my feeble knees and aking heart yet it pleased them to go but one mile that night and there we stayed two dayes In that time came a company of Indians to us near thirty all on horse-back My heart skipt within me thinking they had been English men at the first sigbt of them for they were dressed in English Apparel with Hats white Neckcloths and Sashes about their wasts and Ribbonds upon their shoulders but when they came near their was a vaft difference between the lovely faces of Christians and the foul looks of those Heathens which much damped my spirit again The seventeenth Remove A comfortable Remove it was to me because of my hopes They gave me a pack and along we went chearfully but quickly my will proved more than my strength having little or no refreshing my strength failed me and my spirit were almost quite gone Now may I say with David Psal I 19.22 23 24. I am poor and needy and my heart is wounded within me I am gone like the shadow when it decâ—ineth I am tossed up and down like the locusts my knees are weak through fasting and my flish faileth offainess At night we came to an Indian Town and the Indians sate down by a Wigwam discoursing but J was almost spent and could scarce speak I laid down my load and went into the Wigwam and there sat an Indian boyling of Horses feet they being wont to eat the flesh first and when the feet were old and dried and they had nothing else they would cut off the feet and use them I asked him to give me a little of his Broth or Water they were boiling in he took a dish and gave me one spoonfull of Samp and bid me take as much of the Broth as I would Then I put some of the hot water to the Samp and drank it up and my spirit came again He gave me also a piece of the Ruff or Ridding of the small Guts and I broiled it on the coals and now may I say with Jonathan See I pray you how mine eyes have been enlightened because j tasted a little of this honey 1 Sam. 14.29 Now is my Spirit revived again though means be never so inconsiderable yet if the Lord bestow his blessing upon them they shall refresh both Soul and Body The eighteenth Remove We took up our packs and along we went but a wearisome day I had of it As we went along I saw an English-man stript naked and lying dead upon the ground but knew not who it was Then we came to another Indian Town where we stayed all night In this Town there were four English Children Captives and one of them my own Sisters I went to see how she did and she was well considering her Captive-condition I would have tarried that night with her but they that owned her would not suffer it Then I went into another Wigwam where they were boyling Corn and Beant which was alovely sight to see but J could not get a taste thereof Then I went to another Wigwam where there were two of the English Children the Squaw was boyling Horses feet then she cut me off a little piece and gave one of the English Children a piece also Being very hungry I had quickly eat up mine but the Child could not bite it it was so tough and sinewy but lay sucking gnawing chewing and slabbering of it in the moutb and band then I took it of the Child and eat it my self and favoury it was to my taste Then I may say as Job Chap. 6.7 The things that my soul refused to touch are as my sorrowfull meat Thus the Lord made that pleasant refreshing which another time would have been an abomination Then I went home to my mistresses Wigwam and they told me I disgraced my master with begging and if I did so any more they would knock me in head I told them they had as good knock me in head as starve me to death The ninteenth Remove They said when we went out that we must travel to Wachuset this day But a bitter weary day I had of it travelling now three dayes to gether without resting any day between At last after many weary steps I saw Wachuset hills but many miles off Then we came to a great Swamp through which we travelled up to the knees in mud and water which was heavy going to one tyred before Being almost spent I thought I should have sunk down at last and never gat out but I may say as in Psal 94.18 When my foot slipped thy mercy O Lord held me up Going along having indeed my life but little spirit Philip who was in the Company came up and took me by the hand and said Two weeks more and you shal be Mistress again I asked him if he spake true he answered Yes and quickly you shal come to your master again
bury her and knew it not she being shot down by the house was partly burnt so that those who were at Boston at the desolation of the Town and came back afterward and buried the dead did not know her Yet I ws not without sorrow to think how many were looking and longing and my own Chilren amongst the rest to enioy that deliverance that I had now received and I did not know whither ever I should see them again Being recruited with food and raiment we went to Boston that day where I met with my dear Husband but the thoughts of our dear Children one being dead and the other we could not â—â—ll where abated our comfort each to other I was not before so much hem'd in with the merciless and cruel Heathen but now as much with pittiful sender-hearted and compssionate Christians In that poor and destressed and beggerly condition I was received in I was kindly entertained in severall Houses so much love I received from several some of whom I knew and others I knew not that I am not capable to declare it But the Lord knows them all by name The Lord reward them seven fold into their bosoms of his spirituals for their temporals The twenty pounds the price of my redemption was raised by some Boston Gentlemen and Ms. Vsher whose bounty and religious charity I would not forget to make mention of Then Mr. Thomas Shepard of Charlstown received us into his House where we continued eleven weeks and a Father and Mother they were to us And many more tender-hearted Friends we met with in that place We were now in the midst of love yet not without much and frequent heaviness of heart for our poor Children and other Relations who were still in affliction The week following after my coming in the Governour and Gouncil sent forth to the Indians again and that not without saccess for they brought in my Sister and Good-wife Kectle Their not knowing where our Children were was a sore tryal to us still and yet we were not without secret hopes that we should see them again That which was dead lay heavier upon my spirit than those which were alive and amongst the Heathen thinking how it suffered with its wounds and I was no way able to relieve it and how it was buried by the Heathen in the Wilderness from among all Christians We were hurried up and down in our thoughts sometime we should hear a report that they were gone this way and sometimes that and that they were come in in this place or that We kept enquiring and listning to hear concerning them but no certain news as yet About this time the Council had ordered a day of publick Thanks-giving though I thought I had still cause of mourning and being unsettled in our minds we thought we would ride toward the Eastward to see if we could hear any thing concerning our Children And as we were riding along God is the wise disposer of all things between Ipswich and Rowly we met with Mr. William Hubbard who told us that our Son Joseph was come in to Major Waldrens and another with him which was my Sisters Son I asked him how he knew it He said the Major himself told him so So along we went till we came to Newbury and their Minister being absent they desired my Husband to Preach the Thanks giving for them but he was not willing to stay there that night but would go over to Salisbury to hear further and come again in the morning which he did and Preached there that day At night when he had done one came and told him that his Daughter was come in at Providence Here was mercy on both hands Now hath God fulsiled that precious Scripture which was such a comfort to me in my distressed condition When my heart was ready to sink into the Earth my Children being gone I could not tell whither and my knees trembled under me And I was walking thorough the valley of the shadow of Death Then the Lord brought and now has fulsilled that reviving word unto me Thus saith the Lord Refrain thy voice from weeping and thine eyes from tears for thy Work shall be rewarded saith the Lord and they shall come again from the Land of the Enemy Now we were between them the one on the East and the other on the West Our Son being nearest we went to him first to Portsmouth where we met with him and with the Major also who told us he had done what he could but could not redeem him under siven ponnds which the good People thereabouts were pleased to pay The Lord reward the Major and all the rest though unknown so me for their labour of Love My Sitters Son was redeemed for four pounds which the Council gave order for the payment of Having now received one of our Children we hastened toward the other going back through Newbury my Husband Preached there on the Sabbath-day for which they rewarded him many fold On Mund ay we came to Charlstown where we heard that the Governour of Road-Island had sent over for our Daughter to take care of her being now within his Jurisdiction which should not pass without our acknowledgments But she being nearer Rehoboth than Road-Island Mr. Newman went over and took care of her and brought her to his own House And the goodness of God was admirable to us in our low estate in that he raised up passionate Friends on every side to us when we had nothing to recompance any for their love The Indians were now gone that way that it was apprehended dangerous to go to her But the Carts which carried Provision to the English Army being guarded brought her with them to Dorchester where we received her safe blessed be the Lord sor it For great is his Power and he can do whatsoever seemeth him good Her coming in was aster this manner She was travelling one day with the Indians with her basket at her back the company of Indians were got before her and gone out of sight all except one Squaw she followed the Squaw till night and then both of them lay down having nothing over them but the heavens and under them but the earth Thus she travelled three dayes together not knowing whither she was going having nothing to eat or drink but water and green Hirtle-berries At last they came into Providence where she was kindly entertained by several of that Town The Indians often said that I should never have her under twenty pounds But now the Lord hath brought her in upon free-cost and given her to me the second time The Lord make us a blessing indeed each to others Now have I seen that Scripture also fulfilled Deut. 30 4 7. If any of thine be driven out to the outmost parts of heaven from thence will the Lord thy God gather thee and from thence will he fetch thee And the Lord thy God will put all these curses upon thine enemies and on them
and before us there was a great Brook with ice on it some waded throgh it up to the knees higher but others went till they came to a Beaver-dam and I amongst them where through the good providence of God I did not wet my foot I went along that day mourning and lamenting leaving farther my own Country and travelling into the vast and howling Wilderness and I understood something of Lot's Wife's Temptation when she looked back we came that day to a great Swamp by the side of which we took up our lodging that night When I came to the brow of the hil that looked toward the Swamp I thought we had been come to a great Indian Town though there were none but our own Company The Indians were as thick as the trees it seemd as if there had been a thousand Hatchets going at once if one looked before one there was nothing but Indians and behind one nothing but Indians and so on either hand I my self in the midst and no Christian soul near me and yet how hath the Lord preserved me insafety Oh the experience that I have had of the goodness of God to me and mine The seventh Remove After a restless and hungry night there we had a wearisome time of it the next day The Swamp by which we lay was as it were a deep Dungeon and an exceeding high and steep hill before it Before I got to the top of the hill I thought my heart and legs and all would have broken and failed me What through faintness and soreness of body it was a grievous day of travel to me As we went along I saw a place where English Cattle had been that was comfort to me such as it was quickly after that we came to an English Path which so took with me that I thought I could have freely lyan down and dyed That day a little after noon we came to Squaukheag where the Indians quickly spread themselves over the deserted English Fields gleaning what they could find some pickt up ears of Wheat that were crickled down some found ears of Indian Corn some found Ground-nuts and others sheaves of Wheat that were frozen together in the shock went to threshing of them out My self got two ears of Indian Corn and whilst I did but turn my back one of them was stolen from 〈◊〉 which much troubled me There came an Indian to them at that time with a basket of Horse-liver I asked him to give me a piece What sayes 〈◊〉 can you eat Horse-liver I told him I would try if he would give a piece which he did and I laid it on the coals to rost but before it was half ready they got half of it away from me so that I was fain to take the rest and eat it as it was with the blood about my mouth and yet a savoury bit it was to me For to the hungry Soul every bitter thing is sweet A solemn sight methought it was to see Fields of wheat and Indian Corn forsaken and spoiled and the remainders of them to be food for our merciless Enemies That night we had a mess of wheat for our Supper The eight Remove On the morrow morning we must go over the River i. e. Connecticot to meet with King Philip two Cannoos full they had carried over the next Turn j my self was to go but as my foot was upon the Cannoo to step in there was a sudden out-cry among them and j must step back and instead of going over the River j must go four or five miles up the River farther Northward Some of the jndians ran one way and some another The cause of this rout was as j thought their espying some English Scouts who were thereabout In this travel up the River about noon the Company made a stop and sate down some to eat and others to rest them As I sate amongst them musing of things past my Son Joseph unexpectedly came to me we asked of each others welfare bemoaning our dolefull condition and the change that had come upon us We had Husbands and Father and Children and Sisters and Friends and Relations and House and Home and many Comforts of this Life but now we may say as Job Naked came I out of my Mothers Womb and naked shall I return The Lord gave and the Lord hath taken away Blessed be the Name of the Lord. I asked him whither he would read he told me he earnestly desired it J gave him my Bible and he lighted upon that comfortable Scripture Psal 18.17 18. I shall not dy but live and declare the works of the Lord the Lord hath chastened me sore yet he hath not given me over to death Look here Mother sayes he did you read this And here I may take occasion to mention one principall ground of my setting forth these Lines even as the Psalmist sayes To dealare the Works of the Lord and his wonderfull Power in carrying us along preserving us in the Wilderness while under the Enemies hand and returning of us in safety again And His goodness in bringing to my hand so many comfortable and suitable Scriptures in my distress But to Return We travelled on till night and in the morning we must go over the River to Philip's Crew When I was in the Cannoo I could not but be amazed at the numerous crew of Pagans that were on the Bank on the other side When J came ashore they gathered all about me I sitting alone in the midst I observed they asked one another questions and laughed and rejoyced over their Gains and Victories Then my heart began to fail and I fell a weeping which was the first time to my remembrance that J wept before them Although J had met with so much Affliction and my heart was many times ready to break yet could J not shed one tear in their sight but rather had been all this while in a maze and like one astonished but now J may say as Psal 137.1 By the Rivers of Babylon there we sate down yea we wept when we remembred Zion There one of them asked me why J wept J could hardly tell what to say yet J answered they would kill me No said he none will hurt you Then came one of them and gave me two spoon-fulls of Meal to comfort me and another gave me half a pint of Pease which was more worth than many Bushels at another time Then J went to see King Philip he bade me come in and sit down and asked me whether J would smoke it a usual Complement now adayes amongst Saints and Sinners but this no way suited me For though I had formerly used Tobacco yet I had left it ever since I was first taken It seems to be a Bait the Devil layes to make men loose their precious time J remember with shame how formerly when J had taken two or three pipes J was presently ready for another such a bewitching thing it is But J thank God he
down they would starve and dy with hunger and all their Corn that could be found was destroyed and they driven from that little they had in store into the Woods in the midst of Winter and yet how to admiration did the Lord preserve them for his holy ends and the destruction of many still amongst the English strangely did the Lord provide for them that I did not see all the time I was among them one Man Woman or Child die with hunger Though many times they would eat that that a Hog or a Dog would hardly touch yet by that God strengthned them to be a securge to his People The chief and commonest food was Ground-nuts They eat also Nuts and Acorns Harty choaks Lilly roots Ground beans and several other weeds and roots that I know nor They would pick up old bones and cut them to pieces at the joynts and if they were full of wormes and magots they would scald them over the fire to make the vermine come out and then boile them and drink up the Liquor and then beat the great end of them in a Morter and so eat them They would eat Horses guts and ears and all sorts of wild Birds which they could catch also Bear Venmson Beaver Tortois Frogs Squirrels Dogs Skunks Rattle-snakes yea the very Bark of Trecs besides all sorts of creatures and provision which they plundered from the English I can but stand in admiration to see the wonderful power of God in providing for such a vast number of our Enemies in the Wilderness where there was nothing to be seen but from hand to mouth Many times in a morning the generality of them would eat up all they had and yet have some further supply against they wanted It is said Psal 81.13 14. Oh that my People bad hearkned to me and Israel had walked in my wayes I should soon have subdued their Enemies and turned my hand against their Adversaries But now our perverse and evil carriages in the sight of the Lord have so offended him that instead of turning his hand against them the Lord feeds nourishes them up to be a scourge to the whole Land 5. Another thing that I would observe is the strange providence of God in turning things about when the Indians was at the highest and the English at the lowest I was with the Enemy eleven weeks and five dayes and not one Week passed without the fury of the Enemy and some desolation by fire and sword upon one place or other They mourned with their black faces for their own losses yet triumphed and rejoyced in their inhumane and many times devilish eruelty to the English They would boast much of their Victories saying that in two hours time they had destroyed such a Captain and his Company at such a place and such a Captain and his Company in such a place and such a Captain and his Company in such a place and boast how many Towns they had destroyed and then scoffe and say They had done them a good turn to send them to Heaven so soon Again they would say This Summer that they would knock all the Rogues in the head or drive them into the Sea or make them flie the Countrey thinking surely Agag-like The bitterness of Death is past Now the Heathen begins to think all is their own the poor Christians hopes to fail as to man and now their eyes are more to God and their hearts sigh heaven-ward and to say in good earnest Help Lord or we perish When the Lord had brought his people to this that they saw no help in any thing but himself then be takes the quarrel into his own hand and though they had made a pit in their own imaginations as deep as hell for the Christians that Summer yet the Lord hurll'd them selves into it And the Lord had not so many wayes before to preserve them but now he hath as many to destroy them But to return again to my going home where we may see a remarkable change of Providence At first they were all against it except my Hu band would come for me but afterwards they assented to it and seemed much to rejoyce in it some askt me to send them some Bread others some Tobacco others shaking me by the hand offering me a Hood and Scarfe to ride in not one moving hand or tongue against it Thus hath the Lord answered my poor desire and the many earnest requests of others put up unto God for me In my travels an Indian came to me and told me if I were willing he and his Squaw would run away and go home along with me I told him No I was not willing to run away but desired to wait Gods time that I might go home quietly and without fear And now God hath granted me my desire O the wonderfull power of God that I have seen and the experience that I have had I have been in the midst of those roaring Lyons and Salvage Bears that feared neither God nor Man nor the Devil by night and day alone and in company sleeping all sorts together and yet not one of them ever offered me the least abuse of unchastity to me in word or action Though some are ready to say J speak it for my own credit But I speak it in the presence of God and to his Glory Gods Power is as great now and as sufficient to save as when he preserved Daniel in the Lions Den or the three Children â—u the fiery Furnace I may well say as his Psal 107.12 Oh give thanks unto the Lord for he is good for his mercy endureth for ever Let the Redeemed of the Lord say so whom he hath redeemed from the hand of the Enemy especially that I should come away in the midst of so many hundreds of Enemies quietly and peacably and not a Dog moving hi tougue So I took my leave of them and in coming along my heart melted into tears more then all the while I was with them and I was almost swallowed up with the thoughts that ever I should go home again About the Sun going down Mr. Hoar and my self and the two Indians came to Lancaster and a solemn sight it was to me There had I lived many comfortable years amongst my Relations and Neighbours and now not one Christian to be seen nor one house lest standing We went on to a Farm house that was yet standing where we lay all night and a comfortable lodging we had though nothing but straw to ly on The Lord preserved us in safety that night and raised us up again in the morning and carried us along that before noon we came to Concord Now was I full of joy and yet not without sorrow joy to see such a lovely sight so many Christians together and some of them my Neighbours There I met with my Brother and my Brother in Law who asked me if I knew where his Wife was Poor heart he had helped to
which hate thee which persecuted thee Thus hath the Lord brought me and mine out of that horrible pit and hath set us in the midst of tender-hearted and compassionate Christians It is the desire of my soul that we may walk worthy of the mercies received and which we are receiving Our Family being now gathered together those of us that were living the South Church in Boston hired an House for us Then were moved from Mr. Shepards those cordial Friends and went to Boston where we continued about three quarters of a year Still the Lord went along with us and provided graciously for us I thought it somewhat strange to fet up House keeping with bare walls but as Solomon sayes Mony answers all things and that we had through the benevolence of Christian-friends some in this Town and some in that and others And some from England that in a little time we might look and see the House furnished with love The Lord hath been exceeding good â—o us in our low estate in that when we had neither house nor home nor other necessaries the Lord so moved the hearts of these and those to wards us that we wanted neither food nor raiment for our selves or ours Prov. 18.24 There is a Friend which sticketh closer than a Brother And how many such Friends have we found and now living amongst And truly such a Friend have we found him to be unto us in whose house we lived viz. Mr. James Whitcomb a Friend unto us near hand and afar off I can remember the time when I used to sleep quietly without workings in my thoughts whole nights together but now it is other wayes with me When all are fast about me and no eye open but his who ever waketh my thoughts are upon things past upon the awfull dispensation of the Lord towards us upon his wonderfull power and might in carrying of us through so many difficulties in returning us in safety and suffering none to hurt us I remember in the night season how the other day I was in the midst of thousands of enemies nothing but death before me It 〈◊〉 then hard work to perswade my self that ever I should be satisfied with bread again But now we are fed with the finest of the Wheat and as I may say With honey out of the rcok In stead of the Husk we have the fatted Calf The thoughts of these things in the particulars of them and of the love and goodness of God towards us make it true of me what David said of himself Psal 6.6 I watered my Couch with my tears Oh! the wonderfull power of God that mine eyes have seen affording matter enough for my thoughts to run in that when others are sleeping mine eyes are weeping I have seen the extrem vanity of this World One hour I have been in health and wealth wanting nothing But the next hour in sickness and wounds and death having nothing but sorrow and affliction Before I knew what affliction meant I was ready sometimes to wish for it When I lived in prosperity having the comforts of the World about me my relations by me my Heart chearfull and taking little care for any thing and yet seeing many whom I preferred before my self under many tryals and afflictions in sickness weakness poverty losses crosses and cares of the World I should be sometimes jealous least I should have my portion in this life and that Scripture would come to my mind Heb. 12.6 For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth and scourgeth every Son whom he receiveth But now I see the Lord had his time to scourge and chasten me The portion of some is to have their afflictions by drops now one drop and then another but the dregs of the Cup the Wine of astonishment like a sweeping rain that leaveth no food did the Lord prepare to be my portion Affliction I wanted and affliction I had full measure I thought pressed down and running over yet I see when God calls a Person to any thing and through never so many difficulties yet he is fully able to carry them through and make them see and say they have been gainers thereby And I hope I can say in some measure As David did It is good for me that I have been afflicted The Lord hath shewed me the vanity of these outward things That they are the Vanity of vanities and vexation of spirit that they are but a shadow a blast a bubble and things of no continuance That we must rely on God himself and our whole dependance must be upon him If trouble from smallar matters begin to arise in me I have something at hand to check my self with and say why am I troubled It was but the other day that if I had had the world I would have given it for my freedom or to have been a Servant to a Christian I have learned to look beyond present and smaller troubles and to be quieted under them as Mosis said Exod. 14.13 Stand still and ses the salvation of the Lord. FINIS