but Jesus Christ made my faith to fight against it but it was very sad and bitter to me and after I was buffeted God made me see the vilenesse of sinne and sinful thoughts and made me in his strength resolve against all sin and to hate it and to walk colsely with my God and chuse rather to offend all the world then commit the least sinne and to lose all and suffer all miseries rather then commit the least sin For God can make ones own heart and conscience a hell to one and ones bed and all ones comforts bitter as death And I desire to prize mercy and close walkings with God to lie down and rise up with him and to pitty others This precious experience and lesson God taught me by that affliction as by many other and drave sin and vain thoughts from me in some measure making Christ sweet and fulfilling his Word in Rom. 6.14 and Rom. 8.28 My God doth give me sweet experience of the growth of grace in my soul and all from the virtue of Christs blood Before this Sacrament my preparations were not so great as they should have been but my God did drive me from resting on any thing in my self and brought me to him without money and without price and gave me sweet assurance of the truth of the work of grace on my heart I love him because he loved me first and with his loving kindnesse did he draw me This Sabbath when I went to the Sacrament I saw my preparation small and my thoughts not so sweet as they should but my heart desiring the Lord to order my thoughts aright and act my graces in singing part of the 23 Psalm before morning Sermon God sweetly melted me in some measure with some teares of love and after did as it were sweetly take me by the hand set me down at his table and comfortably intimated it was my portion and so I sat under his shadow with great delight and his fruit was sweet unto my taste and God did act my faith to take Christ and pardon sanctification mortification in his bloud and sealed deliverance from temptations by his body broken and bloud shed and all the fruits thereof some effects I had afterward and the Word was sweet and I came home rejoycing and resolving to live and die to and for and with God giving my self for ever to him to live and move all in him and by him to rest upon his word and promise and expect to live by him according to it I desire to have such a day again to receive Christ I was many wayes failing all is free grace God doth all that is good in me for I am a hell by nature but I have found most precious vertue in the blood of Jesus Christ that it hath in some measure meekened my spirit and overcome wicked thoughts in me Next Sacrament I was failing in my preparation and acting of my graces and was troubled I had no more light of Gods countenance and my corrupt nature was apt to rise but God kept it down and afterward taught me these lessons by it 1. That sin was not so bitter to me nor so bitterly bewailed by me as it ought the more bitter sin is the sweeter is Christ 2. That God would have me prize Ordinances to enjoy Christ but not to rest upon them 3. That I should live by faith and not by sence yea though there be no sence 4. That Gods loving countenance is better then life and that God would have me depending and contented with whatsoever he will give O that I could learn and practise these lessons which were precious fruits of the Ordinances This Sacrament I was failing in my meditation examination and excitation and my dead heart much hindred me in the service of the living God but the Lord brought me to his table with some assurance it was my portion and I sat under his shadow and he acted my graces I desire to magnifie free grace and to expect strength from him to do it according to the Covenant sealed in his bloud This Sacrament I had some sweet actings of faith above sence and assurance that God was my father and his power and wisdom would order all things for my good This Sacrament though I did not mourn for my sins that did slay my Saviour nor act sacramentall repentance as I ought yet by faith I received Jesus Christ and came home with some comfort and had some softnesse of heart I had sweet expeâ—ience of my Gods answering my prayer in the very thing I desired This Sacrament though I did not receive so much of Christ as I desired yet I had some sweet effects of his blood in resolving in his strength not to give way to unbelief nor sin and desiring to come again to his Ordinance This day I was at a fast and God came sweetly in and melted my heart and made his promise good that they that wait on him shall renew their strength God sweetly answered my 〈…〉 mercy for one of my children This day I did receive Jesus Christ in the Sacrament and came home rejoycing and assured my sinnes were pardoned and that Christ could as well be pulled out of heaven as I pulled from Christ I renewed my Covenant I gave my self to my God for his service for ever This Sacrament I did receive Jesus Christ and sweet influence from him and I desire to honour him in all things for ever in my soul body estate will affections and all I and all I have are his and to be at his ruling in all things at all times These are fruits of Christs bloud I desire to bear about the world with me the dying of the Lord Jesus and to be crucified to the world by his crosse and to do and suffer for him and endeavour the good of others souls and I found my inward man much strengthened and sin weakned This Sacrament God gave me some resolutions but I had not much comfort This Sacrament I had sweet assurance that my sins should be destroyed I kept a fast day by my self to seek help from God in the great strait I was in for no power but his could help me out and deliver me The Lord did graciously assist me and afterward I kept a fast in private with others about it my heart was out of fraâ—e and very heâ—vy and perplexed but God came in and melted and made the duty very sweet and at night a sweet quiet and believing waiting frame came upon my spirit God answered my prayer sweetly and particularly That text in 1 Cor. 10.13 the Lord made good to me I resolved to keep a fast by my self and humble my soul before the Lord and poure out my complaint before him and seek strength from him God sweetly encouraging me with many Scriptures and melted my heart oft pouring it into his bosome and drew me out of my self into Jesus Christ Again I kept a fast by my self to seek
the Lord and humble my self for my failings and God did sweetly melt my heart and helped me to pray and made it a comfortable day and I desire to hope and wait for a gracious answer and God did answer me very graciously I kept another fast by my self to seek the Lord to mortifie my corruptions that I might not dishonour him but be acted by him and his grace to his glory and to order all for me aright according to his will the Lord sweetly assisted me and I desire to wait for an answer and blessed be his name he hath sweetly answered my prayer by many remarkable providences which I desire to improve to his glory God did visite me with a fever and had shaken his rod at me before but I took not warning as I should for God is so gracious that he delights not in afflicting the chilren of men if they return Gods chastizing me was very full of tender gentlenesse I felt little or no pain but kept my bed from munday till saturday and God chained up Satan that he did not at all tempt me but I lay with abundance of peace and assurance of Gods love and God made my bed for me and raised me up again in much faithfulnesse and shewed me why he had contended with me and I acknowledged Gods dealings exceeding just mercifull and faithfull The sinne that God did especially afflict me for at this time as he did convince me was my great sinning about the Ordinances God will be sanctified in them that draw nigh to him and I had been very formal in duties cold in them neglected to go to Ordinances did not prepare my self before I went as I should coming sometimes late distracted at holy duties and was unprofitable under them not so mourned when I heard Gods name blasphemed glad when Sabbaths were done and vain thoughts then also guilty of much Sabbath prophanation in coming to the Lords day with a cōmon worldly frame of heart and having such a cōmon worldly frame of heart on the said dayes Being too long in bed on the Lords dayes mornings and not doing duties as Sabbath dutys and not walking answerable to the Sabbath Ordinances I enjoyed So that it was high time for God to come now The experiences that I have got by this are that God is very patient and good and faithful he will not leave me unpunished altogether neither will he fail or forsake me in it therefore I resolve in his strength to love him fear him and his goodnesse serve him walk closely with him be zealous for him give up my self my all to be laid out for his glory and in his service and to sanctifie him in all my drawings near to him to serve him alone in his strength and the power and spirit of Christ enabling me for if he leave me to my self I shall sinne more then ever these are some of the fruits I desire should come forth from this rod. I kept a Fast by my self to humble my soul before God and renew my repentance and seek help and direction from him and my God made it a sweet day unto me I kept another fast by my self for the same mercies that I did the other before and the Lord did much assist and help me to mourn for sinne and to pray for Zions peace and of the land I kept another fast by my self to humble my soul for mine own sins and the sins of others and to seek for direction in the straight I was in and the Lord did help me and after much and long seeking to God the Lord did answer me The fourteenth of December 1655. God did vouchsafe unto me a very great deliverance wherein I saw abundance of his power wisdom and goodnesse in it to me which were wonderfully discovered in the way of it to the Glory of God and honour of the Gospel even to the acknowledging it elsewhere to be the very hand of God An answer of prayer I was fully freed and cleared I desire this great experience should be food for faith and that I called on God for it was the faithfulnesse of God in performing that promise that he would keep in his way and he kept me in my calling which was his way and so I had protection from him and he found out a way for me and I desire to improve my freedome for his glory and walk more spiritually and closely all my dayes with God then ever I have done The experiences I got by this were 1. That it is the duty and safety of a Christian to walk and keep in the way of God had I been out of Gods way I had been gone 2. That there is no difficulty too hard for God but his wisdom can find out a way and his power can bring it to passe and his faithfulnesse will do it 3. That it is the duty of Christians to wait Gods leisure and time which is the best and fittest time 4. It is their duty also never to trust to their own heart but in God and expect direction protection and guidance from him and I resolve in Gods strength alwaies to be and continue in his way and to believe no difficulty too hard for him but his wisdom can find out a way and when we cannot his power can bring it to passe and his faithfulnesse will do it and I will never trust mine own heart more but wait on God trust in him and expect all from him and hang upon him by faith and prayer I kept another fast by my self my God did help me in some measure I desire to lay all my sacrifices on Christ that precious altar that I may be accepted and answered I kept another fast by my self for one of my children God carried me through the duty with some sweet meltings and incomes I desire to wait on him for an answer and to live my prayers and still to trust in him and do duties in faith and obedience I kept another fast by my self about my children desiring to do all in Christs strength and to expect all upon his account and God did give me very precious answers I kept another fast by my self to be humbled for my own and others sins as my childrens my Fathers house and Sir Walters and the sins of the times and to seek blessings and sanctifications of Gods dispensations and directions from the Lord and desire to wait I kept another fast by my self for my children and other things God did humble me in some measure and assist me And God did wonderfully and speedily answer O blesse the God that heareth prayers and follow God for further mercie I kept another fast by self about one of my children and God gave me some sweet assistance in the duty and acceptance in Christ This Sacrament I received Christ and had sweet fruits from him This Sacrament God did help me to go against some difficulties and my special errand to Christ was to deliver me
salvation and call upon the name of the Lord I will pay my vowes unto the Lord now in the presence of all the people Thus did she note down in a Book the gracious dealings of God towards her to quicken her to thankfulness and suitable improvements to the glory of God Temptations and buffetings are not to be given way unto but opposed to conquer them Her faith she said fought with them and they were subdued under her Jam. 4.7 Resist the devil and he will flee from you Afflictions and mercies when improved bring forth much fruit in the people of God as her sicknesse and deliverances did in her Heb. 12.11 Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous but grievous neverthelesse after-word it yeeldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousnesse unto them which are exercised thereby Psal 32.7 Thou art my hiding place thou shalt preserve me from trouble thou shalt compasse me about with songs of deliverance Gods gracious returns of prayer to his people do much engage them in affection to him and encourage them for the future to seek more unto them O blesse the God saith she that heareth prayers and follow God for further mercies And elsewhere I desire this great experience should be food for faith Psal 116.1 2. I love the Lord because he hath heard my voice and my supplications because he hath enclined his ear unto me therefore will I call upon him as long as I live 2 Cor. 1.10 Who delivered us from so great a death and doth deliver In whom we trust that he will yet deliver us True grace is permanent and growing the motion that is naturall is perpetuall My God saith she doth give me sweet experience of the growth of grace in my soul The longer she lived the more she acted Job 17.9 The righteous also shall hold on his way and he that hath clean hands shall be stronger and stronger Revelations 2.19 I know thy works and charity and service and faith and thy patience and thy works and the last to be more then the first Mr. Thorowgood's Letter to Mr. Case Reverend Sir I Understand you intend to print your Sermon preached at the funeral of our most honored friend Mrs. Scot that Saint of the Lord that eminent believer of the highest form and therewith some narrative concerning her It is not onely lawfull but sometimes very expedient to shew the Coates and Garments Dorcas made whilst living especially the excellencies of great believers whose memory is blessed and which may so much conduce to the advancing of the glory of Gods free grace and the good of others for which cause no doubt the severall graces and holy actings of Gods people are left on holy record I am willing to cast my mite into the treasury Her conversion she told me was occasioned by a fall from her horse in hunting time whereby one of her legs were put out of joynt which the Lord so sanctified to her as it brought her to the serious receiving of the immortall seed of the Word thereby forming Christ in her in whom the New-birth did most evidently shine ever after O happy fall that did so exalt her before she was very vain delighting in dancing and hunting But then God brought her to hear his rod and to receive instruction and to solace her self in the joys of the spirit and to pursue the ways of holinesse thus God did not take away her comforts but changed them and gave her better in the room He did not dry up the stream but diveried it and turned it into a better channel It was not long after her conversion from nature unto grace but she was likely to be perverced from truth unto error and was much troubled about the way of Separation some of which way lived near her and got accesse to her and so was in danger of loosing on the one side much of what she had gained on the other But the gracious God out of his continuing goodnesse as she told me proviced Mr. Elmestone that old disciple a skilfull Pilot to freer her coune again to rights who can relate more concerning this particular and ever since through grace hath she sailed with a full and steady gale in the ways of truth and holinesse and hath been a fired star in the Church of God no ways moved with the ermurs and fallings of many round about her wandring on the right hand and on the left after once God had caused her eares to hear that word behind her saying This is the way walk in it she shunned their books company and discourses tending that way as taking no pleasure therein and would not tempt God by going to the meetings of such as caused division being sully perswaded of the truth and way she practised thus trees by shaking become more firmely stoted She was converted in the height of Prelacy and was of the true old Puritane and right Nonconformist's Spirit unto her dying day accounting our Churches and Ministery essentially true though wanting in circumstantials she earnestly desired and in her place fervently endeavoured a through reformation without forsaking the Assemblies and leaving the work to others but would set to her helping hand also She went on to perfection but laid not again foundations she held what was good rejecting the ill being of quick and sound understanding to discern between good and bad She would mourn with the house of Cloe for what was beyond her sphere to amend and walked very comfortably with Christ her self in the middest of the golden Candlesticks having her own garments undesiled and others unworthinesse did no way prejudice her She was a very great and constant prizer of the faithfull Ministers of Jesus Christ and rejoyced not in their light for a season she knew them that were over her in the Lord and esteemed them very highly in love for their works-sake and endeavoured peace and unity with the rest She walked in all the commandments and ordinances of the Lord blameless never missing any when able to go and much troubled when necessarily detained by illnesse she thought not they could be too often enjoyed when she could not go in her Coach in Winter time by reason of the deepnesse of the way between Congherst and the Church she would walk on foot in all the rainy and tempestuous weather that long and tedious up and down hill way to ride she alwayes dreaded since her fall and when in London often did she go from high Holbourn to Christs-Church to the morning Sermons on the Lords dayes before the reft began and then to them afterwards Constantly did she attend Lectures and Fasts publick and privare In Summer when she was at Congherst usually there in the Countrey she had a weekly Lecture at Howkherst and the Ministers still at her house Very often did she keep in secret whole dayes of fasting and seeking God by her self in prayer and humbling and afflicting her soul before the Lord. When I was forth
she her self would pray with her family once I coming home late unknown to her heard her and she prayed to my very great admiration and satisfaction Twice in the family morning and evening not onely prayers were but something of the word and singing part of a Psalm On the Lords day at noon singing and praying with the family besides morning duries and evening reperitions of the Sermons together with singing of a Psalm and Praying A true sanctifier and spirituall observer of the Lords dayes she was and dared not to speak of any worldly civil though at other times lawful things and oft bewailed the too much liberty many professors take on those days marvailing their consciences were so benummed concerning that Commandment more than others that they could talk of such civil and worldly things then without remorse not considering that Commandement is broken in words thoughts as well as others especially when that place in Isa 58.13 is so expresse against it Not doing thine own wayes nor finding thine own pleasure nor SPEAKING THINE OWNE WORDS viz. upon the Sabbath dayes Besides her privare duties in the family she was very much in secret duties by her self daily her usuall manner was as I have been certainly informed In the mornings as soon as she was up to go into her closet a little while by her self and then went to the performing of spirituall duties together with the family after they were done then she retired into her chamber by her self and read the Bible in order reading and meditating about one hour and then went into her closet afterwards a pretry while Before supper she used to go into her chamber and closet some competent time yea though late when she was necessarily detained abroad before she came home after duties performed in the family at nights when the rest were gone to bed she would walk about half an hour meditating in her chamber and reasoning out any distemper that was upon her spirit to find out the cause thereof and to remove it saying so her heart was brought into frame again and not before Then she went into her closet about three quarters of an hour and this every day She never went abroad but she went first into her closet for some while to prayer and so she did again upon her returnings home On the Lords days at noon after duty done in the family she would retire by herself til they went to the publick worship againe upon the week dayes she would much complaine she was so straitned for time desiring more to speed in secret by her self She was a be lever that had not onely the graces of the Spirit but the sealings and the joyes of the Spirit in her She had much assurance even to the riches of it She knew she was of God and Christ was her Redeemer having loved her and given himself for her and that the Covenant of Grace with all the promises and mercies therein contained and Ordinances were hers And therefore in all places where Providence cast her would she partake of all the Ordinances and not infringe her Christian right and liberty as being tied to one particulat place or people onely living without the Sacrament till she came there againe though ordinarily she looked upon her self as a member of that Church where her usuall dwelling was She was filled with joy and walked in the comforts of the holy Ghost she was of a very chearfull Spirit and grace did carry it on very graciously and spiritually she had much communion with God in all the means of grace the Lord made her joyfull in the duties of prayer the Word was the savour of life unto life unto her and the rejoycing of her heart Exceeding incomes she had at the Table of the Lord there she sat under Christs shadow with great delight and his banner over her was love and his fruit was very sweet unto her taste whilst the King sat at his table with her her spiknard did usually send forth the smell thereof The Lord did grearly blesse that Ordinance of his Supper unto her she said she could ferch from the Lord there any mercy she wanted direction in straights support and comfort in disturbances power against sin and Satan grace to carry her on in the wayes of God c. Much refreshing she had in singing of Psalms she had many and particular returns of prayers from God which she much looked up to him for after she had directed them unto him and took speciall notice of his gracious answers and improved them with thankfulness to his glory She was of very excellent naturall parts full of wisdome and prudence as appeared also in the well managing of her many and weighty affaires and did greatly abound in the knowledge of Divine Mysteries contained in the Scriptures Much weaned from and crucified to the world Whilst her Father Sir Mathew Howland her Unkle Sir John Howland lived she would say foreseeing the same as being their onely heir she was afraid of too much of the world coming to her Never any use or increase would she take for any money 's she lent though to a very considerable summe and time and left under her own hand that her children should take none also for the same after her in case she died before the principall was paid in Her good works and charity not only Hawkherst but Holburn also and other parts can testifie as your self well know and can amply relate Her good works extended not only to her own Nation but also to the Hungarian Scholers who come so far to partake of our practicall Divinity counting her self a Member of the same universal Body with them For divers years often would she have one of them time after time with her whilst in the Countrey and now did take care of one this Winter at one of her sons till next Summer she thought to come again and retake him into her Family Their Land have divers already returned into it that have caused her piety and liberality to sound amongst them there She disdained not to visit any of her poorest neighbours and did love to do it to raise up pity in her towards wards them and thankfulnesse to God for her self who had made the difference Neither did she refuse to do the meanest offices of love for the good of them and theirs Her artire your self knowes how grave and modest it was as also her Daughters without nakednesse or unseemlinesse The gracions Providences of God were exceeding many and very great and remarkable towards her wherein she saw much of her Fathers care and goodnesse which she took special notice of and was abundantly thankful for and endeavoured to improve them answerably to his Glory as appears in her Diary where she hath kept an account of them and also of her waies towards her God as there she often calls him She was like that vertuous woman your Text spake of in her carriages in and toward
her Family ordering and taking care thereof and them in it and herself imployed about something or other of the same when she was not in her spirituall converses with the Lord or taken off by other occasions She considered well both her husbands estates and freed them from the incumberances for her children whom she much endeavoured to make the children of God in bringing them up in his nurture and admonition and keeping divers days of fasts by her self to seek the Lord for them in which and divers other respects they could not but arise and call her blessed and give we her of the fruit of her hands and let her own work praise her in the gates As her life so her death was full of grace and comfort the Lord strengthened her upon her bed of languishing and made all her bed in her sicknesse when she was walking through the valley of death she feared no evil her God was with her his rod and his staffe they comforted her and ministred to her an enterance abundantly into the everlasting Kingdome of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ Though her paines and tortures were great the Physitians applying cupping glasses to her and lancing her yet the Lord did comfortably lift up the light of his countenance upon her and put gladnesse in her heart and made her patience have its perfect work she was full of heaven breaking forth in expressions of Gods goodnesse to her saying God hath been very good to me how good is God and how good it is to wait upon God there hath not the least cloud interposed between God and my soul all this sicknesse I will go to my God triumphing Thus with gladnesse and rejoycing was she carried to enter into the Kings Pallace into the joy of her Lord where there is fullnesse of it and pleasures for evermore O mark we the perfect behold we the upright for the end of such is peace No marvail that even Balaam in the sence hereof did so desire to die the death of the righteous and that his end might be like theirs and well had he done if he had withall desired his life alike For ever magnified be my good God who hath determined the times before appointed and the bounds of our habitations that caused the lines to fall unto me in such a pleasant place so long even six years in the same family with her and that I should be chosen and ordained a Pastor to her and the people there at Hawkherst That ever I was so acquainted with such an eminent practicall experimentall spiritual staid believer abounding so much with the graces and sealings and joyes of the holy Ghost That I should have such a taste of that happinesse and delight that is in the society of reall Saints How did I live as in a lower heaven walking as in Paradise whilst I was there rejoycing in the goodnesse of the Lord all the day long calling the wals salvation and the gates praise what sweet experiences of Christ had I frequently communicated to me from her How greatly did she stâ—engtheâ— my hands in the Lords work in the middest of all the opposition among that people the righteous God recompence it and all the work and labour of love she shewed towards his name unto me into the bosome of heâ— children seven fold as likewise alâ— I found from my much honoured long deceased friend Mr. Scot heâ— husband in his day whose memory is very precious to me O unhappy Engagement that so disengaged us from one another and that people there The Lord is righteous and his wayes also mercy and truth his pathes are judgment a God of truth and without iniquity just and right wonderfull in counsel excellent in working Wisdome and might are his he changeth time and seasons making every thing beautifull in them manifold are his works in wisdome hath he made and done them all the earth is full of his riches whatsoever he pleaseth that doth he in heaven and in the earth and in all deep places We are not to murmure and say what is the cause the former dayes were better then these for we may not wisely inquire concerning this yet unsensible we should not be of such a losse and breach as this is like the sea who can heal it whereunto shall I liken and compare it that such a burning and shining light should go out amongst us such a fixed star a star of the first magnitude should seâ—â— our horizon How hath the Lord covered those parts with a cloud in his anger and cast down the beauty of them to the ground how is the gold become dimme and the most fine gold changed how is the precious daughter of Zion and the glory of those parts departed For these things I weep mine eye mine eye runneth down with water Oh that my head were waters and mine eyes a fountain of teares that I might weep day and night even with the weeping of Jazer yea mourn with a great mourning as the mourning of Hadadrimmon in the valley of Megiddon for good Josiah when he was taken away Oh dolor exprome vires non sum solito contentus sone neâ— indociles lugere simus Scotam â—â—emus Ye Ministers of Christ weep over her that was such a cordiall constant prizer of you O Weal of Kent take up a wailing for her the brightest star in all your firmament is set O Hawkherst make a bitter lamentation for her whose coming among you was like the rain upon the mown grasse as shoures that water the earth O poor of those parts and Houlbourn and elsewhere set upon the ground and keep silence cast dust upon your heads gird your selves with sackcloth hang down your heads to the ground arise cry out in the right in the beginning of the watches pour out your hearts like water before the face of the Lord â—ift up your hands towards him who hath taken her away from you that did not with hold you from your desire nor caused your eyes to fail that did not eat her morsel herself alone and you did not eat thereof that did not see you without covering or perish for want of clothing whom your eares have blessed when heard her and your eyes have given witnesse to her when seen her and your loines have rejoyced when warmed by her and ye widows whose hearts she hath made to sing for joy when she saâ— as Queen among the mourners O Hungarian Scholars call for the mourning women and send for cunning women that they may come and let them make haste and take up a wailing for you that your eyes may run down with teares end your eye lids gush out with water for a great Patronesse of yours is gone Sir I am not yet out of my amazement by this great and suddain blow to perceive the end of the Lord. In respect of her self it is happinesse not suffering her to be longer absent from him here in the body having with her swift
motion finished her course so soon But why in respect of us is this Citizen of heaven so soon gone from us when but somewhat more then in the midst of her dayes We may fear a storm coming when the Father calleth his Children so hastily home The Lord fit us for the worst of times and our last hour When Mr. Scot her husband that godly and faithfull Magistrate died and soon after that godly and faithfuull Minister of Christ in the neighbouring place of Landherst also died it was much upon my heart that some evill was a coming and accordingly was I greatly carried out to preach among my people on Isaiah 57.1 The righteous perisheth and no man laieth it to heart and mercifull men are taken away none considering they are taken away from the evill to come And that Lords day it was finished that very week was that great rising in Kent in 1648. though I had not the least hint thereof till they were up which God was pleased notwithstanding in mercy presently to avert But this is not yet participated the Lord goeth by me and I see him not he passeth on also and I perceive him not his way is in the sea and his path in the great waters and his footsteps are not known These wheeles within the wheeles are not yet manifested the great thing upon my spirit is Lord why hast thou taken away thy faithfull and tallent-improving servant whilst nature was so strong and vigorous in her thus before her time Righteous art thou O LORD when I plead with thee yet let me talk with thee of thy judgments We cannot see thy works from the beginning to the end yet must we believe though clouds and darknesse are round about thee yet righteousnesse and judgement are the habitation of thy throne I know O Lord thy judgements are right and thou in faithfullnesse hast afflicted us Thy works are great sought out of all them that have pleasure therein thy secret is with them that fear thee thy way O GOD is in the Sanctuary and there are thy goings to be seen The good Lord sanctifie this great and sore affliction to us and hereby the more quicken us to the improvement of our time and talents to the utermost whilst it is day before our night come when we also shall cease to work So prayeth Sir Yours affectionatly to serve you in Christ NICOLAS THOROWGOOD Minister of the Gospel sometime at Hawkherst now at Monkton in the Isle of Thanet and County of Kent Mr. Elmstones Letter to Mr. Case Sir I Am perswaded that not onely we the friends and acquaintance of this lately deceas'd Gentlewoman Mrs. Scot the Paragon of Piety and Christian wisdome but even strangers that never before heard of her yea those of the generation to come will con you much thanks for that your labour you intend as by a Letter from Mr. Thorowgood I understand to hold up her remembrance among the living though she be dead that the glory of Gods grace which was in her eminently conspicuous may thereby be magnified and she set forth as a lively pattern of piety by Christian Gentlewomen to be imitated It will indeed conduce nothing to the advancement of her happy condition who without sence of what is here done below touching her to her full satisfaction enjoyeth the beatificall vision of her most dear Saviour Jesus Christ But it were pitty that such a mirrour of Gods grace in her and the splendor of it shining from her should lie in obscurity the knowledge whereof might cause many thanksgivings to God for her and happily kindle in some brest a kindly flame of a godly imitation of her wayes Touching the occasion of her conversion what it was I perceive that Mr. Thorowgood hath informed you which I think he could do better than my self as who living a good while in her family might hear her often relate it so that touching that I need to say nothing save only that so it was as he writeth occasioned by a fall from a horse and the putting of her leg out of joynt The danger whereof put her upon the reading of Books that concerned piety and Religion whereby it pleased the Lord to work in her some serious sence and care of Religion But she did no sooner begin to mind matters of Religion but that some two of that way of the rigid separation called Brownisme and disciples of John Turner the name of one of which was Scotchford both living in Cranebrook by the means of a Tenant unto Glassenbury living in the Gate-house took notice of it and together got accesse to her and began to instill into her some of their principles of the separation and it seems had much shaken her so that she began to be scrupulous of holding communion with our then Churches viz. England It fell out that while they were thus working at times upon her and she wavering that in that Festivall time of Christs Nativity which in such houses was kept with some solemnity of good cheer these Sectaries came to Glassenbury and after dinner had gotten an opportunity to conferre with Mrs. Scot then Mrs. Roberts somewhat privately in a Chamber where yet was present Mrs. Crisp her Aunt a godly Gentlewoman now also deceased and John Morgan a retainer to that family a very honest man now also dead The good Gentlewoman the rest were somewhat puzzeled with the somewhat knottydiscourses of these Sectaries Now it was so by Gods Providence that I was also at that time and had been there for some dayes invited by Sir Walter Roberts now deceased to and his Son young Mr. Roberts who for six years together at least had been my Scholar and boarded in my house Wereupon it came into that John Morgans mind to make a motion to Mrs. Roberts to send for me and that I should conferre with those Sectaries she did gladly entertain the motion and they how willingly I know not yeelded to it so I coming to them there we conferred together for some two houres it may be before them about points of Separation especially about receiving the Sacrament amongst such a confused multitude as then was the manner by the iniquity of the times whether it might lawfully be done or could be done with any comfort The issue of our conference was such by the Lords blessing that Mrs. Roberts was satisfied about such objections as they made had her scruples cleared listened no more to their suggestions and they being now out of hope of gaining her left her so that from thence she continued her attendance upon the publick Ministery and held in in the Communion of our Churches as true though then in many things somewhat corrupt and defective And this Sir is the story of that passage if you think meet to make use of it I should be willing that you would not mention me by name but only say that a Minister being at that time there by Providence was called in to conferre
stand idle any time in the least measure though it were but a very little time She would not she said for a great deal spend so much time in dressing as many do knowing how to spend her time if she had more And saying I like this fashion well either in her apparrell or dressing that soonest could be put on and take up least time often charging her maid to get all things ready against she came to be dressed saying she could hardly afford her self time to be dressed yea in the winter evenings would she be long in her closet She was a diligent reader of the Scripture privately by her self every day She kept many dayes of fasts secretly by her self upon many occasions and for her children And those dayes would she set apart for the said fasts upon which there were some great shews or sights to be seen in the City as twice she did upon a Lord Mayors day the occasion of her fasts falling out on those times of the year making choice of those dayes rather then others because of the vanity of the seasons and prophannesse in the City by surfeiting and drunkennesse more then at other times And how full of heaven would she come out of her fasts How heavenly would she pray in the family those nights How fervently how broken hearted in confessions How heavenlized was she in so much that the next day she hath wished she could live without eating or sleeping to spend that time upon the immediate service of God such enjoyments of him did she find therein III. As she was much in holy duties publick and private so she was exceeding carefull to perform every duty in its season that one should not justle out another her private performances should not hinder her publick attendances and her publick service should not infringe her private and very diligent she was in not omitting the least duty God did give her that spirituall art of redeeming and improving time above thousands of Christians Her publick performances though many did not abate her one minute of her private IV. As she was carefull in performing all those duties that concerned her self so also those concerning her family resolving with Joshua that she and hers would serve the Lord. As soon as her children came to any understanding she made them learn the Catechismes first Mr. Wilsons and Mr. Bal's Catechismes and from the year 1653. the Assemblies lesser Catechisme and God did so blesse her endeavours that when her children were very young yet could they soon give her an account of their whole Catechisme without book and as soon as any of them could read she caused them diligently to read and would exercise their memories by calling them to an account of what they could remember of that they had read in the Bible or other good Books and of what they had heard when they had been at Church and it was wonderful to hear what a large account they would give of what they remembred Surely God did much blesse her prayers for them else I know not how possibly they could do so She would make all children pray privately by themselves before they went to bed and in the mornings when they did rise Also she would instruct in repetitions of what they could remember what had bin preach'd telling them oft they must give account to God of their time and what they had read and heard exhorting them to walk in the waies of God when she should not be by seting before them the good to be found in Gods service and the miseries that would fall on them if they walked not in his waies She would not keep any servant that was prophanely wicked saying she would not have such if they would give her their service she would have no servant of an erroneous opinion I have heard her severall times say she would rather have those that were prophane then such because there is little hope of convincing the erroneous but more hope to convince the prophane she was very willing her servants should go to Lectures and to the fasts at the end of the morning exercises which were once a moneth she would afford them time and encourage them to go to them and if she had a servant that could not read she would cause her children to teach such and her self also would do it as she could spare time to encourage them and buy books for them V. I shall give an account of the method of her duties and every dayes work First in the morning as she did rise before she was off her bed she made her children give her an account at her beds side of their Catechismes in course one one morning and another another when they were so large in their accounts as she could hear but one a time when she was off her bed she went to her closet for some time then afterward she had refreshed her self with something she would perform family duties with the family when she had no Chaplaine in reading something of the Word and prayer Then she would use some little exercise she could find best for her health which should not be long and so to her closet again reading the Scripture by herself and spending the rest of the forenoon unlesse some great occasions called her off till about eleven a clock when she came out and while she was making up her own bed which she did every day except the Lords days for her exercise she would cause her children to read the Scriptures one one morning and another another and as they read she would ask them what they understood by such a place instructing them as they read if a place where some judgements were denounced against sin or a sinner she would say see what cause you have not to sin and what you must look for if you do so exhorting them from every such place By that time she had done and was dressed it was well nigh dinner time in the winter time she loved not to come out of her chamber before dinner was at table because the forenoons were so short unlesse some businesse more then ordinary had called her away In summer time sometimes she would walk a little before dinner in Lincolns-Inne-fields and twenty to one if she had not found an object of charity to scatter her benevolence upon before she came in again after dinner after some little space to her closet again where she was sometimes longer and sometimes shorter as her occasions would permit if that afternoon she went to a Lecture or to visit friends she would be sure to go into her closet before she went out of doors and when she came home to her closet again for some time then when she was undressed and in her night garments that was the time of her meditation when she would walk sometimes an hour or untill it drew neer to suppertime and so to her closet againe till supper was ready after supper she would walk again till
strangers were not so intimately acquainted with her worth and excellency painted pieces look best at a distance but real and living are not discovered but bâ— nearer approaches Anâ— therefore a word to avoiâ— prejudice will not be unnecessary I must confess it is verâ— sad to observe how unabâ—â— many Professors are to beaâ— the just commendation 〈◊〉 those who do excell in verâ—â—tue I am not willing 〈◊〉 search into the reasons lest I be thought to burdeâ— others with censure while I seek to cast it off from mâ— self I will onely say thâ—â— much It is as unworthy Christians to envy the glory oâ— â—hem that are illustrious as â—t would be to detract from â—hem Especially when their â—minency is reported not for the discouragement â—nd reproach of them that are in a lower sphere but for their instruction and to provoke to imitation It â—hould rather chear us to the â—eart to see the beames of â—he Lords grace breaking â—ut with so much glory to â—he Giver and that God â—s glorified by others better then our selves and that while we are at the bottome of the hill others get â—earer to the top height of Christian perfection My Apology is this iâ— in this report I have exceeded the bounds of trutâ— and modesty bear witnesâ— to the excesse but if I havâ— spoken the truth why am 〈◊〉 smitten As for the truth of whaâ— I have spoken let the annexed Testimonies of so many Reverend and godly Divines with other authentique witnesses bear record as also those many others that might be produced both in City and Countrey who had the happinesse to be privy and conscious to her walk and course I may truly say she had a good report of all men 3 Joh. 12. and of the truth it selfe Now whether in this Character given of this worthy Christian I have been acted by a spirit of flattery or a desire to do good Yea whither so much to honour the dead as to provoke the living to an holy emulation of like strictnesse and heavenly Conversation the Searcher of hearts knoweth who will both bring to light the hidden things of darkness 1 Cor. 4.5 and make manifest the Counsels of the hearts and then shall every man have the praise of God Reader how much more honour and comfort will it be in that day to be a follower of what thou readest then a Judge I leave to thine own conscience to determine The Lord give thee to profit by this and other the instances of his grace which is the prayer of him who is Thine in the service of the Gospel Tho. Case PROVERBS 31.29 Many Daughters have done vertuously but thou excellest them all THe nine first Verses of this Chapter contain a notable Modell of Instructions which Solomons Mother taught him calculated most properly for his use and direction as he was a King It is called a Prophesie under which notion Counsel and Instruction is sometimes signified not in the Old-Testament onely but also in the New the Originall occasion whereof was because the Office of the Prophets was to teach and instruct the people as well as to foretell and reveal things to come This fatter part of the Chapter from the tenth verse to the end containeâ— a most elegant descriptioâ— of an excellent woman To whom this Characteâ— is to be ascribed admits oâ— varions thoughts amongsâ— Interpreters The Papistâ— attribute iâ— to the Virgin Mary Some of the ancient Fathers to the Church the Spouse of Christ Rabbi Solomon applieth it to the Old Testâ—ment And after him Lyra to the whole Scripture But all these are not only wide but wilde conjectures Some with more probabilitie asâ—ribe it to Bâ—thsheba Solomons Mother as pen'd and composed by Solomon as an Encomium or Panegyrick of her Excellencies which he dedâ—cates unto her by way of a gratulatory acknowledgement of her singular piety in these Motherly instructions recounted in the former part of the Chapter But lastly others conceive that the whole description to be but the Character of an excelleâ—t woman at large and not particularly applyed to any single person but as it were a general Draught or Portraicture by which we may know an excellent woman a Wife indeed when we see her And it is conceived that this description is a continued part of this Prophesie which Bathsheba dedicated unto Solomon and was specially intended to be his Rule and Standard in the choice of a Wife the special study and care of a pious Mother as we see in Rebecca towards Jacob Gen. 29.46 And to this conjecture I doe rather incline In this description the eighthteenth precedent verses contain the particular vertues and praises of this excellent Woman my Text is the summa totalis the Compendium and Coronis of the whole Character the Crown wherewith she is Crowned as it were in the face of Heaven and Earth God and Angels and Men Many Daughters have done vertuously but thou excellest them all Have done vertuously the Original Word signifieth properly to bring forth children Chaiâ—l from Chul dolore eviti with sorrow and hard labour hence also it sometimes signifieth vertue sometimes riches because neither is ordinarily attained and prosecuted without much industry and activity Gnashu Chaijl fecerunivirtutem the phrase here used to the letter is to be translated have done vertue or performed worthy things they have acted strenuously which seems to approve our translation as that which is most proper They have done vertuously Many Daughters Daughters here is taken more Hebraico for a Woman as men are called Sons so women are called Daughters Cant 3.5 But how doth this p urality of good Women many Daughters have done vertuously agree with that complaint of Solomon Eccles 7.28 one man amongst a thousand have I found but a Woman amongst all these have I not found Some salve the difficulty thus Solomon speaks in refference to his â—â—n experience He had not found one good Woman indeed amongst a thousand referring to his former sensual converse with women He had a thousand Wives and Concubines all the Daughters of strange prophane Nations and therefore it was no wonder he could not finde one good amongst them all they all proved snares to him to turn away his heart from the Lord unto Idâ—ls 1 Kin. 11.3 But these words are Bathshebas words in reference to her own experience who by conversing with a better soâ—t of Women then her Sonne did found not onely one but many good ones of that sex many Daughters have done vertuously I but even she makes a very great difficulty also of finding one Object Verse 10. Who can finde a vertuous woman for her price is far above Rubies the question seemes to imply a good woman to be a rare jewel and hardly to be found But the Answer to both these Objections is Answ that neither the meaning of Solomon nor his Mother is to condemn one sex more then the other But
of grace and a want in grace between sincerity and corâ—uption in his pâ—ople between a childe and a bastard And he will not throw the heap of corn into the fire because there is much chaff in it he will not reprobate the gold because there is dross mixt with it Isa 57.17 18. nor disinherit the childe because a weake childe froward Ephraim because a childe God will heal him and lead him and restore comforts to him and to his mourners Vse It may serve 1. To encourage weake Christians say not in thy heart I have no grace because thou findest much corruptioâ— God doth not say so Tâ—â— heavenly Father can discovâ—â— a spark of grace in a sea 〈◊〉 corruption Christians muâ—â— learn to distinguish betweâ—â— the having of corruptionâ— and the allowing of corruâ—tion between a little gracâ— and being contented with 〈◊〉 little grace 2. It may serve to Cautiâ—â— us against despising of oâ— weaker brethren He is nâ—â— of the spirit and dispositioâ— of our heavely Father thâ— can despise one of Chrisâ— little ones a little faith anâ— a little strength some gooâ— thing towards the Lord Goâ— takes notice of and Goâ— owns so should we if 〈◊〉 will be the Children of ouâ— heavenly Father Him that 〈◊〉 weeke in faith receive onely â—ot to doubtfull disputations So is the Rule Ro. 14.1 â—e should own the weakest â—hristians to encourage and â—elp their graces but not 〈◊〉 perplex them with unproâ—able disputes 3. It may serve as an Enâ—ouragement to all to be â—od to labour to get grace â—ho would not serve such a â—od as will own the least â—ood that is in his children â—â—at knows how to pardon â—reat sins and to accept of 〈◊〉 little grace where there is â—â—cerity Bring into God â—hat thou hast thy mite â—hall be accepted if it be all â—hou hast Farre litabo persius A paire of Turtle â—â—ves will be accepted on â—ods Altar as well as costâ—er Sacrifices where the saâ—rificers ability will extend no higher But cursed 〈◊〉 the deceiver which hath in hâ— Flock a Male Mal. 1.14 and sacrificeâ— to the Lord a co rupt thinâ— A man is accepted with Goâ— according to what he hath 2 Cor. 8.12 〈◊〉 according to what he hath noâ— Onely let not this make yâ—â— idle to be content with a littâ—â— grace because God will acceâ—â— a little argueth no grace 〈◊〉 all know thus much I bâ—seech you that though Goâ— will own the weak Christiaâ— yet he delights in the exceâ—lent which brings me upoâ— the third and main Doctriâ—â— which I intend to handle The great honour a d'praiâ—â— of a Christian iâ— to be excelleâ—â— in goodness and grace Doct. 3. Excellent Saints are Goâ— delight Take a few Demonstratâ—ons 1. The word of Command Dem. 1. â—ll the Precepts and Exhortaâ—â—ons of Scripture run upon â—hat strain walk before me Gen. 17.1 â—nd be thou perfect said God â—o Ab aham Abraham must â—ot take up with any thing â—hort of perfection And â—hat you may not think that â—as a special instance which â—ll are not bound to follow â—â—e Evangelical Rule which â—oncerns all Christians â—peaks in the very same Langâ—age Be ye perfect Mat. 5. ult ye with â—â—s addâ—tion of highest emidency as your heavenly Father is perfect 1 Pet. 1.15 As he that hath called you is holy so be ye holy in all manner of conversaâ—ion for it is written be ye hoâ—y for I the Lord your God am holy Observe Christians must make God the pattern oâ— their holiness and the Motive of their holiness Holy as he is holy there 's our pattern holy because he is holy ther 's our motive They must content themselves with no measure or degree of holiness but forgetting the things that are behinde presse still after further degrees of conformitie unto God These be not onely Evangelicall Counsels as the Papists sottishly teach that so upon this foundation they may build their Superstructure of merit and works of supererrogation but they be Evangelical precepts and commands enjoyned upon the great prerogative of divine filiation and indeed flowing from it Matth. 5.45 that you may be the children of your heavenly Father there is no boasting of divine Son-ship without conformity unto the divine nature not that this conformitie is the cause of our Son-ship but the evidence Tunc dicitur saepe aliquid esse quum esse intelligitur Beza in loc that you may be i. e. that you may be known to be the children of your Father which is in Heaven According to this tenor run all the commands of the Gospel perfect holiness in the fear of God 2 Cor. 7.1 proving what that good and acceptable and derfect will of God is Be perfect Ro. 12.1 2 2 Cor. 13.11 Phil. 1.10 11. be of good comfort sincere without offence filled with the fruits of righteousness Whatsoever things are true whatsoever things are honest chap. 4.8 whatsoever things are just whatsoever things are pure lovely of good report if any vertue if any praise think on these things My Brethren the purity of Scripture Rule and the perfection of Scripture Rewards are the two impregnable Arguments and Demonstrations of the Divâ—nitie of the Scripture and the truth of Christian Religion against all other Religions in the world Behold the Rule is an Excellent Rule which God hath chalked out to his Saints to walk by calling for nothing short of perfection in their aimes and utmost contention How perfect is the Law of God! Psal 19.7 2. Dem. 2. Demonstration such God commends and of such onely God boasts in Scripture hast thou not considered my servant Job Job 1.8 said God to Satan there is none like him upon the face of the Earth a perfect and an upright man c. I know Abraham c. Abraham my friend Gen. 18.19 1 Sam. 13.14 2 Cor. 10.18 And David a man after mine own heart Not he that man commendeth but he that God commendeth is approved Thirdly 3. Dem. these Excellent ones God sets forth as Standards and Exemplars for others imitation Be ye followers of me as I am of Christ 1 Cor. 11. â— they be Saint Pauls words but Gods command whose Amanuensis and Secretary the Apostle was and it is the very same which is enjoyned unto all the followers of the Lamb that they should be followers of the Excellent ones Heb. 6.12 who through faith and patience inherit the promises Not onely be ye followers of God as dear Children Eph. 5.1 But Be ye followers of thâ—m that excell in vertue Heb. 13.7 whose faith follow considering the end of their conversation Jesus Christ c. Yet this must be still with the Apostles limitation as they are of Christ we must not follow the Saints further then as they follow Christ Fourthly and lastly For the most excellent Saints is reserved the most excellent glory 4. Dem.
breaking of our loines Ezek. 21.6 One choice Jewel among the rest God has of late gathered to his Cabinet namely pious precious Mistresse Scott Concerning whom because you desired my concurrent Testimony as being one so well known to me having been a member of my Congregation for divers years together till she came to be under your charge I have this to say She was a Gentlewoman of a choice spirit of a marvelous sweet temper and disposition of an amiable winning carriage and of a truly pious and Religious conversation She was one that made Religion her businesse her 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 not her 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 She made it her constant course vigorously to drive a Trade for heaven and to be pressing towards the mark even the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus She was not like those that Austin speaks of qui utuntur Deo ut fruantur mundo But she made use of the world but as a foot-stool to raise up her soul to the enjoyment of God as her portion for ever She was not weary of Gods service like those hypocrites that said what a wearinesse is it Mal. 1.13 but duty was her delight and sin her greatest burden The world did not make her weary of duty but duty made her weary of the world Her constant frequenting of Ordi ances wherein she was both eminent and exemplary her closest retirements wherein she saw often a glimpse of that glory which she now enjoys in the bosom of Jesus Christ made her long earnestly to be at her fathers house and to breath out her Cupio desolvi Oh that I might be with him whom my soul loveth In brief she made haste to heaven lived much in a little time holding forth the Word of life by a holy and undaunted profession holding fast the Word of Truth by a constant and undaunted Resolution and so finished her course with joy Therefore I conceive that this Text which you sweetly opened at her Funeral was rightly and suitably applied to her Many daughters have done virtuously c. This Testimony I have given not for her sake that is dead but for the sake of those that are living The dead praise not the Lord saith David Psal 115.17 Look as the dead return no praises to the living God so neither do they regard any praises from living men Our commendations cannot help them our discōmendations cannot hurt them as our prayers cannot reach them so neither can our praises profit them But happy surely are they that can tread in the Steps of those blessed Saints that have gone before us whose faith follow saith the Apostle considering the end of their conversation Heb. 13.7 If we do as they did we shall speed as they sped The Lord of his infinite mercy help us to serve our generation faithfully as this eminent godly Gentlewoman did that we may do every days duty with Christian chearfulnesse and bear every days burden with Christian patience and in the midst of all changes straites and stormes hold out with Christian perseverance that in the end of our dayes we may receive the end of our hopes even the salvation of our souls It is and shall be the hearty prayer of Your affectionate loving Friend and Brother in the Lords Work JA. NALTON Mrs. SCOTS own writings which she hath left under her own hand A Little before her death she began to write in a book her experiences of Gods goodness to her and intended to have filled it up but she was taken away before she had done many leaves of it onely she had written before divers things in some papers In the Book she beginneth and proceedeth thus SOme notes to keep speciall things in my remembrance that I may be quickned to answer Gods ends in all his gracious dealings to me to whom all his ways have been mercy and truth and I desire my ways towards him may be constrained obedience from faith and love wrought by his spirit in my heart in all things How God did effectually call me at first to himself I was born a child of wrath and an heir of hell and in my youth was very vile and vain Yet I did duties in a formal way and was very confident God did love me and of my good estate Between sixteen and seventeen I was married and about nineteen year old as I was riding it being hunting time I fell down and put my leg out of joynt which was a great misery to me but in that affliction God did work on me with some convictions and resolutions if I were well again to walk in Gods wayes afterward inquiring his Providence brought Mr. Byfields Book to me the Marrow of Divinity and in reading of it God did convince me of my abundant abominable sins I made a catalogue of them I could remember and was in much trouble for them under the spirit of bondage I think some moneths but I have forgotten how long but God made sinne very bitter to me and broke my heart for my sinne and from my sinne and I know God broke my heart because his love did it many a tear of Love did I shed in the bosom of my God When the spirit of Adoption was come to me then how did I mourn for sinning against the Lord and dishonouring of his dear Name But when I was in the pangs of the Spirit of bondage and new birth I had great troubles of Conscience and grievous pangs and after that dreadfull basphemous thoughts and fain would I have run away from God looked upon his wayes as grievous and had hard thoughts of him but yet the Lord would not let me go but carried me through that I had no power to leave seeking of him and did unhook me and brought me to keep Fasts by my self and to humble my soul before him and shewed me how vile I was in a great measure and made me confesse my sinnes with shame and sorrow Then after this he made me close with Jesus Christ in a promise and gave me full assurance that all my sins were pardoned by the bloud of Jesus Christ fully and I gave up my self in Covenant to him and by his sweet influence and shining of his face and comforts of his spirit and grace he hath made me hate the most sweet and secret sin and my hatred of all sin appears because I desire the death of it and desire to be freed from the enjoyment of the sweetest pleasure of the most secret sin that I may enjoy communion with my God whose love is farre better than life and I desire so to esteem it God hath brought me to Christ and hath made me put on his righteousnesse and hath given me to Christ and given Christ to me and I know it certainly that God did choose me from all eternity because he hath made me to give up my self to Jesus Christ for these ends that Jesus Christ gave himself for me That by believing
I might give God the glory of his free grace and faithfullnesse and that my sinnes might be pardoned and mortified and that I may be sanctified and made holy by him redeemed from all iniquity and vain conversation and made a peculiar servant of his zealous of good works that I may honour him in bearing forth much fruit and be fully acted by his spirit and grace for the glory of his name in all things that Jesus Christ may see the travail of his soul in me as much as I am capable so long as I have a being that I may admire free grace God hath given me Jesus Christ by faith oftentimes in Sacraments Word and Prayer and Meditation by the conduit pipes of his Ordinances And I live by Jesus Christ because his Spirit liveth in me in some measure convincing guiding and councelling of me And my desire is to honour him as much as I am capable for ever in his life and strength and spirit Thus farre Mrs. Scot had proceeded in the said Book when the Lord took her from recollecting and improving his gracious experiences to her here to the immediate and perfect enjoyments of himself above Other Writings that Mrs. Scot hath left concerning Gods goodnesse to her ABout the middle of April 1645. there was the second rising in Kent and I was grievously perplexed thinking my husband jewels goods and all I had and my life should have then by the risers been taken from me and I was in exceeding fear and dishonoured God by over much weeping and sorrowing before others but that night I heard the Risers were suppressed then I had much joy and resolved through Gods strength that my heart should be weaned from the world which before I lookt for much help from but I found none I saw it was empty then resolved I also to leave resting upon it and to spend my life and strength and meanes of grace to the uttermost advantage of Gods glory and my souls eternall good and never to sin away any opportunity of doing good and service for his glory Thus did I see that this great straight and dark Providence of the Lord wrought abundantly for my good Two days after I did in private by my self keep a day of fast and had some grief for my own sin and others and had some comfort in Gods acceptance though I was much wanting in the performance of the same After my fast day there was a publick day of thanksgiving for that mercy of subduing the Risers my spirit was much sadded that my heart was no more in frame suitable to the said day that I did no more rejoyce in God in it Afterward I had sweet assurance of Gods eternall love and saw much vanity and emptinesse in all earthly things and desired to order my conversation aright Again I kept another private day of fast by my self and though much distempered yet had some hopes of acceptance I kept another day of private fast by my self to seek to God for more grace to honour him and that God would do also the same in my husband that he might honour God In August 1647. a little after my husband died my heart was exceedingly out of frame but a Sabbath day at night the Lord came sweetly to me in perswading me to trust in him from what he had done So I had sweet assurance of his Eternal love through Christ at prayer and the pardon of all my sinnes and gave my self to him to do with me what he would and so the temptation and those thoughts went away and I had sweet peace Afterward we kept a fast in the family to humble our selves for the breach in the death of my husband and then I had great desires to honour God in my place and gave up my self to God and had peace and afterward sweet assurance that I was his This Sacrament at Hawkherst I was not prepared as I ought to have been the day before I lost my frame of grace exceedingly by my unsensibleness of Irelands misery and being merry when I should have sorrowed and on the Lords day morning before I went to the Sacrament I had a grievous temptation as if I might live without ordinances and as if there were no necessity of them O this deaded my heart to the duty yet my faith fought with it and brought me to the Lords supper where I received Christ and gave my self to him and found sweet comfort and strength from Christ in his Ordinance and I do resolve in Christs strength to walk holily and closely with God all my dayes to his honour and to cleave close to Christ in all his Ordinances whilst I can enjoy them Being reproved by one my heart did greatly rise and I found I was not willing to submit to Gods will and wayes in all things but I had a great combate and was resolved to submit to God in all and saw more of my heart and the world then ever and I had sweet influence from God and shinings of his face in prayer The next Lords day after I had received the Sacrament I went to the Sacrament again my Lord having by a providence provided another feast for me knowing my necessities and I did sit under Christs shadow and did receive his body and bloud by faith Another Sacrament at evening I had very sweet fruits and effects of Christ in me Another Sacrament afterward I was much failing and wanting in doing my duty and acting my grace but God gave me Christ in free grace and I desire to live by faith upon him to him and his glory giving my self to the Lord to be his and not mine own and desire to live on Christ as my portion and strength In January 1650. Mrs. Scot began another of the sweet experiences writes she my God hath given me of his faithfull performances of his Word and Promise to me In January 1650. The Lord sweetly told me in the Ministery of his Word out of the fourth Chapter of the Ephesians the eighth Verse how Christ had led captivity captive in me and for me in some measure the same day an occasion there was that caused my corruptions much to arise but my God according to his Word did lead that captivity captive and at night God gave me sweet comings in of himself into my sould and sweet assurance and some experience of the true real work of Grace in me how God made the risings of sinne the ruine of sin in me by Christ The Lord gave me very sweet experience of his power in preserving me when two in my family had the small pox and three the measels according to his word in Psal 91.7 It shall not come nigh thee O never distrust thy God more After this God did shew me in some measure the cursed vileness of my nature and suffered that bitter root of blasphemy to rise up in my heart and God did this to punish me for my vain and sinfull thoughts
with the Sectaries and did satisfie Mrs. Roberts I cannot tell whether a passage or two be much worth the mentioning but now I am wtiting I have a mind to adde them First while Mrs. Roberts was as a so journer in Glassenbury summer ended when they could not walk abroad before supper in the evenings when it began to be too dark to see how to work and it was too early to light a candle it was her custome with her Aunt Mrs. Crisp and some other young Gentlewomen in the house Mrs. Crisp her daughters especially to meet together in some one of their chambers and sit talking together about an hour or so till candels were lighted Their talk it may be was sometimes of civil matters and such accidents as had fallen out and come to their hearing but there was also ever for the most part somewhat of Religion in relating what they had read in some good book or other or what they had sometime heard I once upon an occasion about such a time stayed at Glassenbury one whole night and then they called me into their meeting and conference where they requested me to repeat the heads of a Sermon I had preached abroad not long before about setting up Idols in the heart out of Ezekiel the 14. and to pray with them Next when the keeping of the house was put over by his Father to Sir Walter Roberts his Lady who being weak in her intellectuals and unable to manage the businesse of the house Mrs. Roberts then was fain to be governesse of the family and oversee the ways thereof which was pretty great In this time she was in some straight how to perform her morning duty of closet prayer to the Lord she thought that it was meetest that God should be first served and sought unto for his blessing all the day after But it seemeth that the thoughts of houshold businesse did interpose that she performed it not with meet freedom of Spirit wherefore Mr. Whitfield that faithful Minister of the Lord who had some relation to the family by his wife coming there she imparted her doubt to him who gave her his opinion that it was the safest way for her first to go down and settle things in the family for the forenoon businesse and then to retire her self to her solitary devotion which she might attend with all freedome of Spirit from houshold affaires and without fear of interruption Besides if upon her giving the first place to her devotion if matters in the family had at any time done amisse it might have turned to some reproach of her religious profession as making her negligent in that her domesticall employment So sir after much scribling I have done if any thing written will be worth the inserting in your intended Narrative I shall be glad of it that I have lighted on any thing to celebrate the memory of that gracious Gentlewoman whose losse I shall feel with others for want of that encouragement we had from her in piety and her respect of us and so desire to lament it If not it is enough that I have shewed my weak desire to contribute somewhat toward her Funerall Obsequies and so commending you to the safe keeping and love of our good God in Christ I rest Jan. 31. 1658. Yours in the sincerity of Christian respect and good affection JOHN ELMESTONE Mr. Elliston's Letter to Mr. Case Worthily honoured and dearly beloved Friend I Am requested to give in my thoughts and experiences of that pious and precious Saint Mrs. Scot once shining in our eyes but now alas extinct the fragrancy of whose piety was as an oyntment poured forth among us I confesse I have delaied it and had thoughts wholly to have waved it not c. but fearing I might detract from her worth or eclipse it and being also conscious to my self of my unworthiness and unfitness to give testimony especially of so eminent a servant of Christ who alas so oft doubt of mine own interest This femal glory blessed among women whom God had anointed with the oyl of Grace above most of her fellowes was an insatiable worshipper of God in Christ as was said of the Apostle Paul much on the wings of heavenly contemplation and meditation was this divine Eagle She had laid up her treasure there no marvaile then her heart had its tendency thither ah precious bosome wherein was lodged so much of heaven Oh how fearful good soul was she that the lean kine should eat up the fat that Martha's part should play the thief to Mary's Oh how watchful over her heart calling it slippery and deceitfull saying she had but a little while to keep it and the reward would pay for her paines urging her self on that ground to a fidelity and constancy in her watch and ward She carried Mary's Alabaster of precious ointment with her which she was ready to open and pour out plentifully on others suting her savoury discourse according to the conditions of the parties she had converse withall Oh how cautious was she of giving any offence in her attire or any other wayes saying she never put on her best attire but she had thoughts of cloathing her self with the rich robe of Christs righteousnesse and decking her self with the jewels of his graces Oh how exact in all her walkings carefull to make straight steps to her feet looking where she should set her foot before she took it up that she might tread safely she was rich in Grace but poor in Spirit eminent Grace lodged in a low heart Poor worthlesse creature was frequently in her mouth She would condescend to converse familiarly with the poorest member of Christ not having the grace of Christ in respect of persons the ointment of her love fell as well upon the skirts of the garment as on the head she loved Grace for it self looking on it as amiable clad in russet as in velvet in a poor servant as well as in her Mistresse As all her delight was in the Saints so her delight was in all the Saints she had a heart truly mortified to the world shewed in her contemptuous speeches of it and the glory thereof Oh how beautifull were the feet of Godly Ministers to her a rare grace in these dayes How afraid of the corruptions of the times of soul poysoning Doctrines ceasing her self and perswading others to cease from harkening to the instruction that causeth to erre from the words of knowledge She was a great lover of the Word of the Sabboths very carefull as that her self so those under her charge should carefully prepare for them before they came so holily to observe it when it was come A great prizer of all Gods Ordinances and of all opportunities of Grace which she did husband to the great improvement of soul good The observation of humbling days was frequent with her wherein she was very solemn according to the nature of the duty and now she reapes abundantly the fruit of her
labour She had a marvelous stomack and spirituall appetite to the Lords Supper for the which she did solemnly prepare her self plentifully sequestring her self from the affaires of the world that she might clean her heart for the acceptable entertainment of her beloved no question she met with many a precious dole there who had such a desire to be there She came down from that mount as Moses with a shining face a heart most warm and lively speeches savoury and ravishing refresht with the comfortable sense and feeling of Christs love sweeter then wine filled satisfied with marrow and fatnesse Christ did frequently then and there manifest himself to her kisse her therefore her lips dropped honey as I my self have experience of it I blesse God for it Blessed God what a mercy I am deprived of Oh she was altogether and alwaies lovely Her grace added much more worth to her then her birth or any other accomplishment she had much grace there was in her grace it looked like it self in her I never was in her company but I went off with advantage to me or the fault was my own I might have learned humility contempt of the world to be lively and spirituall c. Oh what a pittifull heart had she to the poor especially of the houshold of faith and as she had a tender heart so a bountifull hand as she saw occasion and would oft say God lent it her for that end and it was a great mercy to have a heart to it to lay out for God is to lay up for our selves 't was her holy ambition to serve God in her generation She was very spirituall in her affections to her relations to her dear Lady Mother and Children wonderfully troubled at their deviations and to think that any that come from her should hisse or sting at Gods glory oh that those cares prayers teares fallen into Gods bottle when worldly teares drop besides it might not as to any of them be rendred fruitlesse Sir many of these flowers she had growing in the garden of her heart her vessel was weak her grace sound and strong she had embarked in her those excellencies that would neither sink nor suffer shipwrack She was rich towards God here she had a Christ for grace and now she hath him and heaven with him for glory She was a Sarah for courage an Abigail for wisdome a Mary for choosing the good part a Dorcas for good works an Elizabeth for walking in all the commandments and ordinances of God blamelesse Sir if ever I had confidence in the happy estate of any that ever I was acquainted with it is greatned in reference to her All that I can say is abundantly below her my prayer to God is that God would favour me with the favour that he beared to virtuous Mistresse Scot So shall I be visited I know with his salvation Sir I hope you will pardon my defects when you understand I was necessitated to write this week or not at all in great haste having much other work on my hands the rest is the subscribing my self Sir Sandhurst Feb. 28. 1658. Your younger brother in Christ and unworthy fellow labourer in the Lords vineyard PETER ELISTON Another Letter of Mr. THOROWGOODS to Mr. Case Reverend Sir SInce my last to you I received further information from a friend concerning that useful and precious Gentlewoman Mrs. Elizabeth Scot by way of Narrative of some other remarkable passages which were not mentioned in my Letter which may be worthy imitation and of singular use to Christians in these declining dayes and may tend to the magnifying the glory of Gods free grace shining forth in her conversation in these following Particulars I. She was much in holy religious Worship and service of God in pubâ—ick exceeding careful not to lose any publick opportunity for the good of her soul making all orâ—inary occasions of her own and visits of friends give place and not to hinder her waiting on God in the publick Ministry of his Word If there were a Lecture she used to go unto and persons of quality came to visit her after she had been with them a while and time was to go she would look upon it as no incivility to leave them with the Lady her mother unlesse they would go with her I never knew any ordinary visit or visiters detain her from attending the Word of God preached for almost these nine years which I have lived in her house She was willing to keep fair Correspondency with all her friends â—nd to maintain a moral principle of love where there was no more but exceeding tired with Lady's discourse at their visits though I suppose in her presence it was farre better then otherwise If any businesse unknown fell out when she was going to the Lecture unlesse it would certainly prove prejudicial to her she would make it stand back and wait till afterward and this I have frequently known and she often said she found Satan very busie to hinder her from laying hold of opportunities this I believe the whole family can testifie with my self II. As she was carefull not to omit any publick opportunity so also as carefull of private duties she would be sure not to lose her closet time where she was frequent and long even when others were at their rest I lying in the Chamber over her have often heard her up at one of the clock in the night or rather morning The Church hath a great losse of her prayers many a petition did she put up in her closet and flouds of teaâ—â— did she pour forth insomuch that her eyes have been sore for some days together which otherwise were very well when any calamity hath been upon the Church of God oâ— the Lord dishonoured by any nearly related to her her teares have been so many that I have behold surrowes on her cheeks and so likewise upon fasting dayes she was so conâ—cienscious in keeping her closet-time that all her ordinary business did stay till she had done and when any of her family have gone to her closet door and told her some would speak with her or came to visit her If the businesse were petty or onely visitors let them have been who they would she would stay out her time knowing the Lady her Mother was below to entertain them but if the businesse were of great importance then she would come But to be sure make haste to her closet again O the sweetnesse she found in her closet communions that she would spend so much time there in the forenoons as that scarce she had time to dress her self often saying her dressing time was the worst time of all her time often bidding her maid make haste saying why are you so long I hate to spend so much time in dressing for this is lost time and whilst her maid was dressing her she would be making up Letters or winding up her watch or some imployment or other not induring to
the servants had supped and then called them in to family duties together with singing of a Psalm after the same were ended and she discoursed sometime with the Lady her Mother she would go to her chamber where she would walk for some time and so to her closet where then she spent much time so long as at the soonest it would be one of the clock before she went to bed oftentimes would she be up till one of the clock in the morning and manytimes the Belman would cry in the streets two a clock in the morning and she no more then a bed and not a sleep asking her maid if that were the Belman I verily believe there was no shop keeper more diligent in keeping his shop then she her closet O what a trade did she drive for heaven she was one that made Religion her businesse indeed Upon the Lords dayes she would be up somewhat earlier then on other dayes though later up on the Saturday nights and if in London in the summertime she would go to the morning Sermons at seven of the clock if the weather were good and then to the rest She was full of heaven in all her discourses on the Lords dayes she was one as in Isa 58.13 that did turn away her foot from the Sabbath from doing her pleasure on Gods holy day and called the sabbath a delight the holy of the Lord honourable honouring him not doing her own waies not finding her own pleasure nor speaking her own words all her discourse at table dinner and supper and every where those dayes should be heavenly and speaking of what was taught those dayes not a word would come from her unsuitable to the day I verily believe if one had been set to watch her all those days long he should not have trapp'd her in one word unsuitable to the day if any thing had displeased her she would not have been displeased on those dayes On Lords-dayes-nights when she was come from Church and undressing her self her children gave her an account of what they had heard at Church and what such had read as stay'd at home and could not go and those of her children she could not hear then she would call to account while the servants were at supper and afterward the family to duty and repeated amongst them what she had written at Church those dayes This last year she caused her eldest daughter Mrs. Frances Scot to repeat in the family being able also to write After repetition a Psalm they sung and then she her self prayed in which duty as she was heavenly so longer then other nights the Lord did not onely give her the grace and spirit of prayer but also a great gift in prayer And as she was one of great gifts and parts so very humble her parts did no way puff her up or cause her to go out of her sphere in the least one of her Chaplaines did much urge her in the Country where she commonly had one in her house to hear her pray but at no hand would she do it this by the way After duty done in the family she went againe to her chamber and so to her closet would be there somewhat longer then other nights and take her bed-time the monday mornings indeed it would be morning before she went to bed Her usuall Lecture dayes at London every week were Tuesday's at Clements Wednesdays Mr. Jenkins at Black-Friars in the forenoon and if she could have time in the afternoon Mr. Calamy's at Aldermanbury before Mr. Jenkins Lecture was at Black-Friars she was constantly at Aldermanbury Thursdayes at Dunstones in Fleetstreet to hear Mr. Manton or at Mr. Case's Lecture at Martines in the fields and Saturdayes at Gregories in the afternoons besides the morning exercises when they were neer VI. As she did lay out her self and time in the service of God so also the greatest part of her estate laying up little here her layings out were more then her layings up she was heaping up her treasures in heaven where neither moth nor rust consume nor thief break through and steal how did she scatter her benevolence every day and so as her left hand knew not what her right hand did Much money did she cast into the poors bason at Fasts and at those fasts once a moneth at the morning exercise the keeping of which she omitted not though many times not well at other private fasts she gave very much there was seldome a week in the winter time but she was called to a private fast for particular persons in some great affliction many weeks she hath bin known to have been twice a week at those extraordinary dutys to the performance of which she would be sure to make all ordinary businesses and visits of friends give place some weeks it hath bin known she hath bin at 3 fasts a week at which fasts she gave the more knowing it would be given to the godly poor and being winter time and the harder with them which scatterings would arise to no small summe in a year if they could be known how much they were Sometimes it hath bin observed and sometimes could not at the least it hath been observed to have bin 2 shillings a time at the more private fasts she would give more In her going to those fasts if she thought the farness of the way would weaken her strength which she kept for the dutys she would send for a Coach at nights if fair she would often come home on foot both for her healths sake and to give the more to the poor saying many might think she went on foot out of covetousnesse but they would be much mistaken and when she came home from those fasts what shift would she make to steal up to her chamber by the door of the room where such as came to visit were that she might not be detained from her closet duty 's But to return to her charity every day how did she scatter her bounty among the poor not to such as made a trade of begging though they used never so moving expressions knowing they were prophane and would take no other course of life from such she would receive many a hard word when they saw her give to others and not to them and her servant hath been fain to defend her sometimes from their affronting her by not giving her way enough to passe Now as she walked London streets she would carefully observe if she could see any poor old people whom she would call to her or command her servant to go and call them to her and would ask them if they were very poor and if they were carefull to serve God and did go to Church and what hopes they had to be saved to which they would answer as they were able and some would say I blesse God Mistresse I am not so poor but the Lord doth provide for me that I am not driven to beg nor extreamly want to whom she
would then give if she had been in hast and gone by any poor people and saw they did not beg she would send her servant sometimes with something to them whilst she kept on her way She would not walk London streets long but one or other would come to her begging for an almes and she would ask her servant if he knew them to be common beggers if he thought no she would be sure to give At Lectures if she saw any that were old or in poor habit attending the word then she would be sure to give them In cold seasons when it was hard with poor people she would be alwaies a speaking of the sufferings of the poor that had no fire or scarce any bread much sympathizing with them asking her servant if he knew any that it went hard with that she might relieve them sending her benevolence her charity was so well known that seldome a day if at home but she had petitions from one or other for the same many under the notion of distressed Ministers because they knew they should receive the greater almes and that they might be sure not to misse of the same they would get a testimoniall of their godly lives sufferings and necessitys with the names of some godly Ministers she knew or had heard of and then hath she given the more when she thought their condition real but give it so privately her self as none should know how much but the receivers None that came with petitions did go away without almes unlesse she had known they had come the second time having bin relieved before many a time have her servants gone up to her chamber or when she was at dinner with a paper or petition they knowing when best to find her at home she would ask them if they knew them fit objects of charity but let the answer be I or no she would send them down something if she could not go down her self saying she would rather give to them that had no need then send one empty away that had sending them down word if they had counterfeited other mens names they would very much wrong themselves as sometimes we could perceive they abused her charity and grew so subtile that they would indite Letters punctually to her by name they having their almes according to their demerit Her charity was exceeding much amongst all the poor people at Hawkherst in Kent where her house was where she was many summers since she used to be in London the winters they have all cause to remember how many have had relief at her door Seldom a Lords day but eighteen had relief there she would exhort those poor to serve God and ask them if they had been at Church those dayes and if they had not they should have nothing which caused some of them to go the oftner for they would be sure to tell one of another and not a day in the week but many of them came and had relief at noon and at nights Sir more I could relate but Mr. Case spake of them in his Sermon and therefore shall proceed no further in these particulars wherein also it may be well said She exceeded many daughters that have done virtuously It pleased the Lord to fill her concluding days with many troubles and abundance of businesse it was wonderfull the trouble and the many businesses she had and how chearfully she went through them and how eminently the Lord appeared to be with her in carrying her through all and making whatsoever she took in hand to prosper Since she came out of the country last she scarce had any time to visit her friends this winter which I never knew before but spending her time much with God Indeed her life was a continual motion never idle in the least either in her closet or with her family in performing religious dutys or reading or writing or going to Lectures and fasts or giving instructions concerning houshold affaires she being now house-keepper in London also as well as in the Countrey to ease the Lady her Mother in her ancient years which she did never before in London though alwaies in the Countrey till this last winter O what a losse hath her friends yea what a losse hath the Church of God and hundreds of poor people whose bowels she refreshed But now she is gone before where her soul long desired to be The Lord help us to make after and not to wish for her again or that she had not dyed Why should we be so foolish it will not avail and why so sinfull and so impudent as to contradict God he saw it best to remove her hence and why should we wish her back again she is triumphing in heaven over the world sinne and Satan singing Alleluja unto Him that sitteth on the Throne and unto the Lamb for ever and ever She is among the spirits of just men made perfect and the innumerable company of holy angels and with the great God the judge of all and with the blessed Jesus the Mediator of the new Covenant and with the holy Ghost the Comforter in the large fruition of the beatificall vision where is fulnesse of joy and pleasures for evermore and why should I wish her from such glorious company and transcendent blisse as never eye hath seen nor ear heard neither hath entered into the heart of man to which mercy 's the Lord in his due time bring us by the merits of his dear Son and our Saviour Jesus Christ Sir These six Heads which I have here sent you are what my friend writ who hath known her many years Yours affectionately to serve you in Christ NICOLAS THOROWGOOD FINIS Errata Pag. 79. lin 19. for Landherst r. Sandherst p. 118. l. 12. dele comma after shop