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spiritum_fw-la meum_fw-la he_o add_v vitam_fw-la &_o honorem_fw-la meum_fw-la the_o mass_n be_v end_v where_o he_o rcceive_v he_o hear_v other_o four_o with_o such_o tranquillity_n and_o devotion_n that_o he_o never_o sigh_v nor_o lament_v be_v thereat_o out_o of_o modesty_n ashamed_a lest_o his_o devotion_n shall_v be_v therefore_o account_v rather_o vainglorious_a then_o virtuous_a in_o this_o he_o excel_v as_o his_o private_a alm_n give_v in_o the_o time_n of_o his_o better_a fortune_n bear_v witness_n and_o the_o religious_a by_o who_o hand_n they_o pass_v can_v affirm_v the_o chapel_n in_o which_o lie_v the_o body_n of_o the_o holy_a mother_n teresa_n of_o jesus_n in_o the_o church_n of_o the_o discalced_a carmelites_n at_o madrid_n be_v part_n of_o his_o alm_n which_o he_o desire_v to_o make_v more_o sumptuous_a if_o his_o order_n have_v permit_v he_o also_o build_v the_o heremitage_n in_o the_o desert_n de_fw-fr batuccas_n and_o cause_v two_o mass_n to_o be_v daily_o say_v in_o that_o which_o be_v near_o to_o pestrana_n he_o say_v the_o office_n of_o our_o lady_n and_o for_o the_o soul_n depart_v have_v continue_v it_o many_o year_n he_o be_v confess_v and_o receive_v in_o the_o pascall_n feast_n our_o lady_n and_o the_o apostle_n and_o examine_v daily_o his_o conscience_n which_o he_o use_v for_o these_o four_o or_o five_o year_n last_o pass_v to_o do_v twice_o a_o day_n he_o have_v thrice_o make_v his_o general_a confession_n before_o this_o last_o which_o he_o end_v on_o saint_n matthewes_n eve_n and_o receive_v the_o next_o day_n in_o the_o prison_n he_o be_v confess_v twice_o or_o thrice_o a_o week_n after_o he_o may_v with_o leave_n do_v it_o he_o pass_v the_o evening_n with_o his_o confessor_n and_o with_o friar_n gregory_n de_fw-fr pedrosa_n in_o spiritual_a question_n so_o high_a that_o it_o appear_v god_n be_v his_o tutor_n and_o the_o school_n the_o prison_n as_o he_o say_v in_o his_o spiritual_a conference_n these_o word_n escape_v he_o i_o wish_v i_o can_v give_v a_o thousand_o life_n for_o my_o enemy_n his_o confessor_n check_v he_o for_o call_v they_o enemy_n whereat_o recall_v himself_o he_o humble_o demand_v how_o he_o shall_v name_v they_o his_o confessor_n tell_v he_o he_o shall_v make_v that_o recognition_n for_o those_o which_o seek_v to_o hurt_v he_o if_o any_o such_o be_v he_o much_o esteem_v this_o advice_n and_o fulfil_v it_o this_o night_n father_n john_n de_fw-fr la_fw-fr madre_n de_fw-fr dios_n companion_n to_o his_o confessor_n bring_v he_o a_o memorial_n of_o bequest_n from_o the_o religious_a of_o his_o order_n which_o be_v prayer_n and_o fast_n he_o be_v great_o comfort_v therewith_o and_o humble_o answer_v that_o he_o hope_v to_o see_v himself_o with_o god_n and_o to_o beseech_v his_o divine_a majesty_n to_o reward_v their_o great_a charity_n give_v discreet_a satisfaction_n unto_o all_o and_o not_o leave_v any_o thing_n by_o his_o near_a approach_n to_o death_n unperformed_a that_o belong_v to_o courtesy_n and_o urbanitie_n or_o virtuous_a policy_n so_o that_o when_o some_o come_v to_o demand_v of_o he_o debt_n no_o just_a cause_n move_v they_o he_o answer_v if_o his_o estate_n be_v in_o himself_o he_o can_v dispose_v thereof_o as_o he_o like_v but_o be_v now_o in_o his_o majesty_n he_o stand_v oblige_v to_o defend_v it_o and_o make_v no_o declaration_n in_o prejudice_n of_o the_o true_a owner_n for_o those_o that_o unjust_o seek_v to_o have_v it_o talk_v with_o father_n john_n de_fw-fr la_fw-fr madre_n de_fw-fr dios_n he_o say_v my_o father_n wife_n child_n estate_n and_o honour_n be_v take_v from_o i_o as_o to_o morrow_n shall_v be_v my_o life_n but_o that_o which_o only_o grieve_v i_o be_v that_o i_o have_v no_o more_o to_o lose_v for_o god_n sake_n the_o memory_n of_o the_o loss_n of_o these_o thing_n do_v not_o trouble_v he_o but_o the_o desire_n that_o his_o death_n may_v give_v example_n to_o other_o so_o to_o live_v as_o to_o save_v their_o soul_n o_o generous_a condition_n of_o a_o zealous_a soul_n all_o love_n seem_v too_o little_a compare_v with_o the_o greatness_n of_o the_o object_n and_o light_a increase_n according_o to_o love_n discern_v more_o clear_o the_o unlimited_a distance_n between_o humane_a power_n and_o divine_a omnipotency_n be_v late_o in_o the_o night_n he_o be_v importune_v by_o the_o religious_a there_o present_a to_o lie_v down_o on_o his_o pallet_n which_o he_o do_v hold_v a_o crucifix_n and_o by_o he_o the_o picture_n of_o the_o holy_a mother_n teresa_n of_o jesus_n there_o he_o repose_v a_o while_n overcome_v rather_o with_o contemplation_n than_o sleep_n he_o demand_v of_o friar_n pedro_n de_fw-fr la_fw-fr conception_n if_o he_o shall_v receive_v extreme_a unction_n who_o answer_v that_o the_o church_n use_v not_o to_o give_v it_o to_o those_o that_o die_v so_o they_o say_v he_o since_o i_o can_v receive_v this_o sacrament_n do_v i_o the_o courtesy_n to_o teach_v i_o the_o ceremony_n thereof_o to_o know_v they_o before_o i_o die_v the_o friar_n take_v a_o manual_a and_o say_v the_o prayer_n litany_n and_o ceremony_n omit_v the_o substance_n of_o the_o sacrament_n he_o give_v ear_n to_o all_o with_o humble_a attention_n and_o devotion_n not_o shun_v but_o seek_v earnest_o to_o prepare_v himself_o to_o die_v in_o the_o well_o perform_v whereof_o he_o place_v his_o great_a happiness_n then_o he_o continue_v in_o mental_a prayer_n from_o five_o a_o clock_n until_o six_o in_o the_o morning_n with_o admirable_a recollection_n for_o the_o which_o afterward_o he_o infinite_o thank_v god_n here_o let_v contemplative_n practise_v in_o prayer_n consider_v the_o divine_a favour_n show_v by_o this_o repose_n to_o a_o man_n that_o have_v the_o sword_n lay_v to_o his_o throat_n who_o thread_n of_o life_n be_v even_o spin_a the_o representation_n of_o death_n secure_v the_o attention_n of_o his_o spirit_n who_o be_v unload_v from_o the_o weight_n of_o this_o mortality_n be_v unite_v to_o its_o everlasting_a beginning_n a_o thing_n so_o desire_v by_o those_o that_o treat_v with_o god_n and_o only_o effect_v by_o death_n and_o wish_v of_o he_o as_o the_o mean_a to_o obtain_v so_o glorious_a a_o end_n that_o morning_n he_o put_v off_o his_o hair_n shirt_n before_o his_o confessor_n modest_o prevent_v the_o public_a inconvenience_n which_o may_v ensue_v by_o what_o he_o desire_v to_o have_v secret_a then_o kneel_v down_o before_o diverse_a grave_n religious_a person_n he_o read_v a_o protestation_n of_o faith_n which_o himself_o have_v make_v in_o it_o be_v contain_v a_o quintessence_n of_o inward_a zeal_n utter_v in_o word_n so_o feel_v and_o significant_a that_o it_o cause_v both_o admiration_n and_o confusion_n don_n pedro_n fernandez_n de_fw-fr mansilla_n a_o alcayde_v of_o the_o court_n come_v to_o take_v his_o leave_n of_o he_o who_o he_o meet_v half_a way_n with_o a_o behaviour_n and_o countenance_n of_o such_o serenity_n that_o it_o parallel_v not_o with_o his_o present_a estate_n don_n pedro_n desire_v he_o to_o command_v he_o some_o service_n to_o which_o he_o answer_v that_o since_o he_o give_v he_o leave_v so_o to_o do_v he_o beseech_v he_o for_o a_o quick_a dispatch_n in_o his_o wife_n and_o child_n business_n which_o be_v a_o sâ—…te_n for_o land_n with_o his_o majesty_n that_o depend_v before_o don_n pedro_n de_fw-fr mansilla_n to_o this_o he_o give_v he_o a_o courteous_a answer_n those_o that_o then_o be_v present_a begin_v to_o shed_v tear_n and_o sigh_v see_v a_o courage_n so_o undaunted_a and_o a_o presence_n so_o venerable_a he_o see_v himself_o to_o be_v the_o cause_n of_o their_o woe_n comfort_v they_o say_v sir_n it_o be_v no_o time_n to_o lament_v but_o to_o rejoice_v since_o i_o be_o go_v to_o do_v the_o will_n of_o god_n these_o word_n give_v cause_n of_o comfort_n to_o pious_a mind_n by_o discover_v the_o good_a estate_n of_o his_o soul_n and_o great_a christianity_n then_o he_o go_v into_o the_o chapel_n in_o a_o cloak_n and_o upon_o it_o the_o habit_n of_o saint_n james_n where_o he_o hear_v many_o mass_n he_o entreat_v the_o carmelite_n that_o say_v it_o to_o put_v his_o soul_n together_o with_o the_o host_n into_o the_o chalice_n this_o be_v to_o follow_v the_o example_n of_o the_o holy_a mother_n teresa_n of_o jesus_n who_o on_o a_o palm_n sunday_n say_v the_o like_a this_o wrought_v so_o good_a effect_n that_o he_o be_v comfort_v both_o in_o soul_n and_o body_n and_o encourage_v to_o suffer_v he_o give_v his_o rosarie_n to_o a_o religious_a man_n of_o the_o order_n of_o saint_n hierome_n for_o account_v himself_o as_o dead_a he_o prepare_v for_o his_o own_o dirge_n thus_o he_o continue_v perform_v many_o act_n of_o contrition_n in_o fervent_a prayer_n until_o the_o time_n of_o execution_n at_o eleven_o friar_n gregory_n de_fw-fr pedrosa_n come_v unto_o