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subsist_v and_o therefore_o say_v he_o i_o see_v it_o necessary_a to_o be_v keep_v under_o affliction_n that_o i_o may_v be_v humble_a for_o god_n will_v not_o reveal_v himself_o to_o proud_a soul_n beside_o this_o habitual_a peace_n and_o assurance_n which_o he_o enjoy_v comfort_n his_o comfort_n he_o have_v many_o particular_a comfort_n from_o the_o lord_n at_o several_a time_n and_o upon_o several_a occasion_n he_o say_v there_o be_v great_a familiarity_n between_o god_n &_o his_o people_n after_o they_o have_v walk_v much_o with_o he_o when_o he_o lay_v down_o to_o rest_v at_o night_n he_o have_v usual_o that_o promise_n speak_v over_o to_o he_o fear_v not_o abraham_n i_o be_o thy_o shield_n and_o thy_o exceed_a great_a and_o rich_a reward_n when_o he_o have_v be_v desire_v such_o pitch_v of_o holiness_n he_o have_v often_o such_o hint_n as_o these_o be_v i_o will_v satisfy_v thou_o when_o he_o be_v under_o any_o special_a affliction_n he_o have_v some_o special_a comfort_n and_o 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great_a occasion_n have_v fall_v out_o in_o the_o day_n he_o will_v still_o retire_v himself_o to_o ask_v counsel_n and_o a_o blessing_n from_o the_o lord_n once_o every_o month_n he_o always_o keep_v a_o private_a day_n by_o himself_o beside_o what_o he_o do_v upon_o particular_a occasion_n to_o seek_v the_o lord_n by_o fast_v and_o prayer_n the_o better_a to_o prepare_v himself_o for_o the_o lords-supper_n and_o then_o also_o he_o have_v much_o upon_o his_o heart_n the_o concernment_n of_o the_o church_n and_o if_o ever_o any_o affliction_n befall_v he_o or_o his_o family_n or_o any_o of_o his_o relation_n his_o constant_a course_n be_v to_o seek_v the_o lord_n in_o a_o extraordinary_a manner_n so_o likewise_o if_o there_o be_v any_o great_a business_n he_o be_v to_o undertake_v or_o any_o more_o eminent_a strait_n wherein_o he_o need_v divine_a counsel_n providence_n and_o protection_n he_o still_o set_v apart_o some_o time_n to_o seek_v god_n in_o a_o more_o than_o ordinary_a manner_n and_o his_o success_n be_v answerable_a for_o he_o have_v always_o some_o gracious_a return_n or_o other_o beside_o the_o set_a time_n of_o prayer_n which_o he_o observe_v he_o be_v full_a of_o occasional_a ejaculation_n he_o be_v seldom_o know_v to_o be_v out_o of_o a_o spiritual_a frame_n and_o in_o that_o frame_n his_o heart_n be_v dart_v up_o one_o holy_a ejaculation_n or_o other_o he_o be_v most_o punctual_a in_o keep_v his_o time_n and_o season_n for_o prayer_n read_v and_o meditation_n whatever_o his_o worldly_a business_n be_v which_o be_v sometime_o many_o and_o weighty_a he_o be_v very_o loath_a to_o abridge_v himself_o in_o his_o wont_a course_n for_o these_o exercise_n and_o if_o he_o be_v necessitate_v at_o any_o time_n to_o be_v short_a he_o will_v be_v sure_a to_o redeem_v the_o next_o opportunity_n to_o regain_v what_o he_o have_v be_v deprive_v of_o he_o be_v wont_a to_o say_v when_o he_o do_v hasten_v over_o holy_a duty_n out_o of_o a_o over_o eager_a desire_n to_o follow_v his_o worldly_a business_n he_o do_v many_o time_n meet_v with_o a_o cross_n in_o his_o business_n but_o when_o he_o do_v take_v his_o ordinary_a time_n god_n do_v make_v his_o other_o business_n to_o succeed_v the_o better_a or_o else_o his_o mind_n be_v bring_v to_o submit_v to_o the_o will_n of_o god_n he_o be_v seldom_o know_v to_o pray_v himself_o duty_n his_o great_a affection_n in_o holy_a duty_n or_o to_o join_v with_o other_o in_o prayer_n but_o his_o heart_n be_v much_o affect_v and_o carry_v out_o with_o much_o holy_a zeal_n and_o fervency_n in_o his_o old_a age_n his_o heart_n will_v melt_v frequent_o and_o he_o will_v often_o be_v dissolve_v into_o tear_n and_o his_o affection_n seem_v to_o be_v as_o green_a and_o vigorous_a as_o the_o affection_n of_o young_a convert_v use_v to_o be_v when_o he_o join_v with_o other_o he_o be_v far_o from_o a_o oscitant_fw-la and_o careless_a carriage_n his_o behaviour_n be_v so_o reverend_a and_o mix_v with_o so_o much_o affection_n as_o that_o the_o minister_n under_o who_o ministry_n he_o sit_v will_v profess_v he_o find_v himself_o very_o much_o help_v and_o quicken_v by_o the_o observance_n of_o his_o affection_n if_o at_o any_o time_n he_o find_v the_o least_o decay_n or_o deadness_n come_v upon_o he_o that_o be_v his_o great_a trouble_n and_o far_o more_o than_o any_o outward_a affliction_n in_o one_o of_o his_o letter_n he_o express_v himself_o thus_o have_v speak_v before_o in_o his_o letter_n of_o a_o bodily_a distemper_n that_o lie_v upon_o he_o he_o go_v on_o thus_o that_o which_o trouble_v i_o now_o be_v the_o distemper_n of_o my_o spirit_n because_o i_o find_v myself_o less_o lively_a in_o holy_a thing_n and_o more_o unactive_a then_o former_o yesterday_o bless_v be_v god_n i_o find_v some_o revive_n when_o he_o awake_v in_o the_o morning_n morning_n his_o private_a exercise_n in_o the_o morning_n if_o it_o be_v before_o the_o ordinary_a time_n he_o be_v wont_a to_o rise_v his_o manner_n be_v to_o spend_v some_o time_n in_o meditation_n and_o the_o subject_n of_o his_o meditation_n for_o the_o most_o part_n be_v somewhat_o of_o the_o great_a work_n of_o redemption_n and_o he_o employ_v his_o thought_n principal_o to_o meditate_v on_o the_o eternal_a sacrifice_n of_o the_o lord_n jesus_n which_o be_v offer_v up_o to_o the_o father_n for_o the_o take_v away_o of_o the_o sin_n of_o his_o people_n and_o according_a to_o this_o his_o own_o practice_n he_o will_v counsel_v his_o child_n every_o morning_n to_o take_v a_o turn_n at_o the_o cross_n of_o christ_n and_o to_o think_v of_o his_o suffering_n and_o that_o will_v be_v a_o mean_n to_o make_v they_o love_n christ_n the_o more_o when_o he_o be_v rise_v and_o dress_v himself_o in_o the_o morning_n he_o will_v let_v fall_v some_o holy_a instruction_n or_o other_o on_o they_o that_o be_v about_o he_o after_o he_o be_v ready_a his_o first_o work_n be_v to_o retire_v himself_o into_o his_o closet_n where_o he_o spend_v a_o considerable_a time_n in_o read_v meditation_n and_o prayer_n his_o daily_a practice_n be_v to_o read_v every_o morning_n some_o part_n of_o the_o scripture_n with_o some_o commentary_n thereupon_o and_o after_o that_o to_o meditate_v on_o what_o he_o have_v read_v and_o be_v much_o take_v with_o the_o spirituality_n and_o judiciousness_n of_o calvin_n exposition_n he_o make_v the_o great_a use_n of_o he_o to_o help_v he_o in_o the_o understanding_n of_o the_o scripture_n after_o he_o have_v thus_o finish_v his_o private_a exercise_n of_o prayer_n and_o meditation_n on_o the_o word_n he_o have_v read_v family_n his_o morning_n exercise_n in_o the_o family_n he_o be_v wont_a to_o call_v together_o his_o family_n and_o communicate_v unto_o they_o what_o he_o have_v learn_v from_o his_o own_o meditation_n and_o the_o exposition_n of_o godly_a divine_n on_o the_o word_n that_o he_o have_v read_v and_o what_o ever_o his_o worldly_a occasion_n have_v be_v he_o will_v scarce_o ever_o omit_v this_o exercise_n with_o his_o family_n but_o every_o morning_n will_v open_v some_o portion_n of_o the_o scripture_n to_o they_o and_o give_v they_o some_o holy_a exhortation_n from_o it_o and_o this_o be_v his_o practice_n for_o 20_o or_o 30_o year_n together_o such_o be_v his_o modesty_n and_o humility_n in_o the_o manage_n of_o this_o work_n that_o although_o he_o be_v of_o a_o great_a judgement_n himself_o of_o long_a experience_n and_o have_v a_o deep_a insight_n into_o the_o thing_n of_o god_n yet_o he_o will_v say_v he_o will_v not_o take_v upon_o he_o to_o interpret_v the_o meaning_n of_o such_o or_o such_o a_o text_n but_o he_o will_v acquaint_v they_o what_o he_o have_v learn_v from_o godly_a divine_n by_o this_o constant_a course_n of_o read_v and_o daily_o peruse_v the_o exposition_n of_o divine_n join_v together_o with_o his_o own_o meditation_n he_o become_v a_o man_n expert_a and_o mighty_a in_o the_o scripture_n so_o that_o when_o he_o come_v to_o speak_v to_o his_o family_n he_o will_v open_v the_o scripture_n with_o much_o clearness_n and_o solidity_n and_o the_o lord_n endue_v he_o with_o a_o wonderful_a ability_n to_o make_v thing_n plain_a and_o familiar_a to_o the_o capacity_n of_o the_o mean_a and_o when_o he_o come_v to_o make_v application_n of_o thing_n to_o those_o of_o his_o own_o family_n he_o will_v be_v sure_a to_o consider_v what_o every_a one_o condition_n do_v require_v those_o who_o he_o fear_v to_o be_v still_o in_o the_o state_n of_o nature_n he_o will_v lay_v open_a to_o they_o the_o danger_n of_o their_o condition_n and_o what_o a_o sad_a thing_n it_o be_v for_o they_o to_o remain_v out_o of_o christ_n and_o what_o ever_o the_o matter_n be_v he_o have_v be_v speak_v of_o his_o exhortation_n will_v be_v sure_a always_o to_o centre_n in_o this_o to_o press_v they_o to_o look_v after_o christ_n in_o who_o the_o father_n have_v lay_v up_o all_o grace_n and_o from_o who_o they_o must_v expect_v to_o receive_v all_o 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other_o that_o belong_v to_o god_n election_n that_o be_v yet_o uncalled_a in_o in_o all_o his_o exercise_n in_o his_o family_n his_o main_a drift_n lie_v that_o way_n he_o will_v still_o be_v speak_v somewhat_o that_o may_v make_v they_o see_v their_o need_n of_o christ_n and_o the_o main_a thing_n he_o will_v press_v upon_o they_o be_v that_o they_o will_v labour_v to_o get_v into_o christ_n and_o to_o make_v sure_a of_o christ_n he_o be_v very_o tender_a and_o compassionate_a to_o they_o that_o be_v under_o temptation_n and_o distress_n of_o conscience_n temptation_n his_o compassion_n towards_o such_o who_o be_v under_o temptation_n &_o several_a that_o be_v under_o trouble_n of_o mind_n do_v resort_v to_o he_o and_o some_o do_v abide_v in_o his_o family_n for_o a_o season_n the_o better_a to_o enjoy_v the_o benefit_n of_o his_o prayer_n and_o counsel_n and_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v so_o far_o to_o hear_v his_o prayer_n and_o to_o bless_v what_o he_o speak_v to_o they_o as_o they_o go_v away_o with_o more_o peace_n and_o satisfaction_n temptation_n his_o own_o temptation_n and_o as_o he_o bear_v a_o tender_a respect_n to_o other_o in_o their_o temptation_n so_o he_o be_v not_o without_o his_o own_o temptation_n it_o be_v true_a his_o assurance_n touch_v his_o estate_n that_o remain_v firm_a and_o unshaken_a once_o indeed_o he_o say_v in_o a_o sickness_n he_o have_v a_o very_a strong_a assault_n from_o the_o enemy_n but_o it_o be_v but_o short_a the_o temptation_n be_v that_o he_o be_v a_o hypocrite_n and_o all_o that_o he_o have_v do_v be_v in_o hypocrisy_n hereupon_o the_o lord_n put_v it_o into_o his_o heart_n that_o suppose_v it_o be_v so_o yet_o now_o he_o shall_v cast_v himself_o upon_o the_o grace_n of_o god_n in_o christ_n and_o immediate_o the_o temptation_n vanish_v but_o though_o he_o have_v not_o many_o assault_n of_o this_o kind_n yet_o he_o be_v not_o without_o his_o other_o temptation_n the_o great_a temptation_n that_o he_o complain_v of_o in_o his_o elder_a year_n be_v infidelity_n a_o year_n or_o two_o before_o his_o death_n he_o complain_v to_o a_o near_a relation_n that_o he_o have_v be_v trouble_v with_o temptation_n that_o be_v very_o grievous_a and_o bitter_a to_o he_o and_o the_o temptation_n be_v whether_o there_o be_v such_o a_o one_o as_o christ_n or_o no_o and_o whether_o there_o have_v be_v such_o action_n do_v by_o he_o the_o next_o morning_n after_o the_o temptation_n have_v be_v upon_o he_o these_o word_n be_v drop_v into_o he_o i_o be_v crucify_a for_o thou_o i_o have_v shed_v my_o blood_n for_o thou_o this_o brake_n and_o melt_v his_o heart_n exceed_o that_o when_o his_o temptation_n be_v of_o so_o grievous_a a_o nature_n that_o the_o lord_n shall_v so_o condescend_v unto_o he_o and_o when_o he_o speak_v of_o it_o he_o speak_v of_o it_o with_o tear_n he_o have_v also_o several_a other_o conflict_n insomuch_o that_o he_o once_o break_v out_o into_o this_o expression_n oh_o it_o be_v hardkeep_v up_o 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to_o the_o same_o purpose_n i_o think_v i_o have_v undergo_v many_o trial_n so_o that_o now_o i_o may_v hope_v to_o be_v quiet_a but_o still_o the_o lord_n provide_v some_o new_a in_o a_o letter_n of_o he_o to_o a_o near_a relation_n he_o say_v that_o his_o life_n it_o be_v make_v up_o of_o mixture_n of_o encouragement_n and_o difficulty_n in_o the_o same_o letter_n he_o add_v i_o do_v think_v it_o may_v be_v much_o conduce_v to_o the_o glory_n of_o god_n and_o to_o our_o advantage_n if_o we_o still_o expect_v such_o mixture_n know_v that_o we_o be_v thereunto_o appoint_v and_o that_o so_o we_o may_v in_o every_o day_n success_n entreat_v the_o lord_n for_o grace_v suitable_a to_o our_o infirmity_n and_o necessity_n whereas_o if_o we_o shall_v limit_v the_o almighty_a to_o have_v our_o will_n satisfy_v we_o may_v displease_v he_o and_o create_v cross_n to_o ourselves_o and_o as_o he_o be_v seldom_o without_o some_o exercise_n of_o affliction_n or_o other_o affliction_n the_o benefit_n he_o have_v by_o affliction_n so_o his_o affliction_n be_v of_o singular_a use_n to_o he_o he_o say_v when_o ever_o he_o be_v out_o of_o the_o way_n the_o lord_n show_v he_o clear_o that_o he_o be_v so_o and_o that_o this_o or_o that_o be_v not_o right_a and_o usual_o he_o do_v it_o by_o affliction_n and_o this_o be_v one_o of_o his_o experience_n which_o be_v remarkable_a he_o say_v he_o never_o have_v any_o chastisement_n in_o all_o his_o life_n but_o the_o lord_n have_v show_v he_o some_o miscarriage_n by_o it_o his_o affliction_n make_v he_o pray_v much_o and_o that_o be_v his_o constant_a course_n when_o any_o great_a trial_n or_o affliction_n befall_v he_o to_o set_v a_o part_n some_o time_n to_o seek_v god_n in_o a_o extraordinary_a manner_n his_o great_a prayer_n when_o he_o be_v under_o affliction_n be_v that_o he_o may_v be_v make_v partaker_n of_o god_n holiness_n by_o it_o when_o his_o family_n have_v be_v visit_v with_o the_o smallpox_n he_o say_v he_o have_v be_v mighty_o stir_v up_o to_o pray_v that_o this_o visitation_n may_v end_v in_o the_o reformation_n of_o the_o family_n and_o that_o they_o may_v set_v to_o the_o work_n of_o god_n with_o all_o their_o might_n and_o this_o be_v usual_o the_o fruit_n of_o all_o his_o affliction_n to_o quicken_v he_o to_o more_o activity_n in_o the_o way_n of_o god_n when_o one_o of_o his_o relation_n have_v be_v sick_a he_o write_v thus_o to_o he_o true_o i_o perceive_v the_o lord_n mind_n be_v to_o wean_v we_o from_o the_o world_n and_o from_o self_n now_o the_o lord_n accomplish_v the_o good_a pleasure_n of_o his_o will_n in_o we_o to_o the_o utmost_a that_o we_o may_v cleave_v unto_o he_o whole_o and_o full_o by_o the_o wisdom_n and_o strength_n of_o the_o lord_n jesus_n in_o we_o be_v not_o dismay_v at_o your_o affliction_n god_n will_v turn_v they_o to_o good_a a_o few_o year_n before_o his_o death_n the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o try_v he_o by_o suffer_v his_o house_n to_o be_v on_o fire_n this_o fire_n 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be_v remove_v out_o of_o the_o house_n and_o those_o which_o be_v poor_a and_o necessitous_a may_v have_v take_v several_a thing_n yet_o such_o be_v the_o love_n and_o reverence_n which_o the_o people_n of_o the_o place_n do_v general_o bear_v to_o he_o and_o the_o experience_n they_o have_v of_o his_o charity_n and_o readiness_n to_o do_v they_o good_a that_o there_o be_v not_o one_o that_o have_v a_o heart_n or_o a_o hand_n to_o take_v any_o thing_n that_o be_v he_o but_o all_o his_o good_n that_o be_v carry_v forth_o be_v preserve_v entire_a without_o so_o much_o as_o the_o loss_n of_o any_o one_o thing_n but_o this_o do_v not_o comfort_v he_o so_o much_o as_o that_o the_o fire_n be_v quench_v
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and_o perturbation_n and_o be_v soon_o move_v when_o those_o that_o be_v under_o he_o have_v not_o give_v he_o due_a observance_n and_o do_v thing_n according_a to_o his_o mind_n and_o expectation_n how_o it_o come_v to_o pass_v that_o now_o in_o his_o elder_a year_n he_o be_v more_o meek_a and_o patient_a and_o seem_v to_o be_v little_o move_v at_o any_o thing_n he_o answer_v it_o be_v not_o because_o he_o find_v not_o the_o same_o thing_n in_o his_o nature_n still_o and_o that_o he_o find_v himself_o more_o incline_v to_o passion_n then_o before_o but_o that_o the_o grace_n of_o god_n have_v now_o overcome_v and_o overpowr_v he_o and_o reduce_v he_o to_o the_o temper_n that_o he_o be_v in_o he_o have_v a_o long_a and_o a_o constant_a remembrance_n of_o his_o change_n before_o it_o come_v change_n his_o expectation_n and_o longing_n after_o his_o change_n and_o herein_o he_o be_v most_o like_a the_o ancient_a saint_n he_o account_v himself_o but_o a_o pilgrim_n and_o stranger_n upon_o 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