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ID Title Author Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication) STC Words Pages
A64571 Christian and conjugal counsell, or, Christian counsell, applyed unto the maried estate by Will. Thomas ... Thomas, William, 1593-1667. 1661 (1661) Wing T986; ESTC R10060 19,708 118

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with one another yea and to converse together as Fellow-heirs of the grace of life what 's a good nature in reference to these things but the white of an egge which hath this in it that it offends not but this withall that it relisheth not Let it be the praise of good natures that they contradict not goodness but is not this a deep defect that they contribute nothing to it Good they be for the six dayes but on the Lords day what is there pleasant in them but their Patience It s true that a fair nature rustles with religion in a froward and seems to get the better yet to them that love to live in a course beyond nature and to see God in a Companion not Cato Socrates Phocion c. Grace with all its faults will be better than refined Nature A piece of Gold is better though it needs its allowance than the compleatest piece of Silver and fretfull Jonas will be found more lovely than the meekest Mariner or the sweetest Nin●vite 72. The next thing to be looked at after the religion of a Consort is the good discretion for Wisedom exceeds Folly as much as Light exceeds Darknesse This is true in all but in those especially of better parts If a Daughter be to be disposed of of more worth nothing is more to be feared next to an Ungodly than an Unworthy Husband for the duty of a Wife is to be subject and with what patience shall wisedom be subject to Folly It may better be born if there be eminency of gifts on the Husbands part and infirmity on the Wives and yet this is a business also for a Husband ought to love his Wife and there 's such a distance between Wisedome and Weaknesse that there will be work enough for a more than ordinary Wisedom to love with a Husbands love a Woman of more than ordinary Weakness 73. After this Mariage-affection requires a pleasing person I say after this discretion which is of the greater consequence even in the matter of affection than an external amiablenesse is for this is the difference between Discretion and Beauty that Discretion is a thing still continuing and still thriving hence the love grounded upon that both stayes and growes but Beauty may be gone suddenly and howsoever is going continually hereupon the affection must needs fall with the foundation yet it combines on both sides in her especially that is to be the desire of a mans eye of no small importance which suppose erelong it loose its lustre yet divers things that will not abide to the last may serve for the rooting and setling of affection at the first 74. Nor is a Patrimony and Portion to be contemned where a Family and Posterity is to be raised Fathers must not onely lay out but lay up for their Children and it is not easie nor a thing so likely that they should lay up much who begin with nothing Besides we would be willing to live so as to expresse Vertue and draw a just reputation from others by the beames of beneficence dispers'd from our selves now though Wisedome and Vertue be truly yea and eminently good in it self yet it is evidently good with an inheritance in which regard howsoever a worldly portion is justly reckoned a very bad Leader yet neglect not to look upon it as a usefull Follower 75. All these things doe in special manner concern the Parties themselves that are towards mariage onely Parents are to see that they doe not out of self will and imperiousnesse or for vain and worldly ends or out of self-respects hinder their Children from walking in but rather do all they can by their counsel and authoritie to guide and carry them in a right and regular way in a matter of so great importance When God hath given Children unto them as his Trustees a chief part of their care lyes in this to take ●eed how they give them away and into what hands they put them for a continual and perpetual abode 76. Mariage being according to these and the like Rules religiously managed as it is an estate honourable in it selfe and in Gods account so shall it be honourable also in the judgement of all those that do impartially observe it yea and in the Consciences of those Men that do ungroundedly oppose it FINIS Magistratus Virum indicat He that will prove his yoke of Oxen proves them best by putting them into the yoke Luk. 14. 19 with 2 Cor. 6. 14. b Gen. ●8 33. c Luk. 10. 39. a 1 Cor. 7. 32 33 34. b 1 Tim 2. 15. c Mark 13 ●4 d Eccles. 2. 2. e 1 Cor. ● 29. f Luke 14. 20. g Mat. 22. 5. a Hebr. 13. 4. Requisites in mariage 1. Zeal 2. Patience b Ecc'es 1. 15. Impatience an enemy to Society 1 With God c Jam. 1. 20. d 1 Tim. 2. 8. 2. With Man 3. With our own Consciences Comforts in crosseness of nature a Numb 12. 3. b Jonah 4. 9. c 2 Pet. 1. 4. The cure of Impatience 1. Consideration of Gods providence d Job 1. ●2 c Eccles. ● 15. 2. Of our own faults 3. A Communing with our own hearts 4. A friend to us and an enemy to our frowardness * Plutarch de Adulat Amici discrim Prayers 3. Wisdom In matters of Religion a Gen. 18. 33. b Luke 11. 9 10. c Ezra 8. 21 22. d Gen. 24. 12 15 7. 1. In religious exercises e 1 Cor. 14. 16. f Jer. 48. 10. g Mat. 9. 16 17. 2. In Christian conference h Heb. 3. 12 13. a 1 Cor. 10. 31. b Gen. 43 34. Judg. 14. 12. c Mal. 3. 16. d Mal. 3. 16. e Col. 3. 16. f Coloss. 3. 16. To edifying is required 1 Clearing the soil 2. A good foundation 3. A ●ight frame 4 A meet manner of build ing a Jude v. 23. b 1 Kings 6 7. c prov 11. 30. d John 3. 12. a Ephes 2. 22. Duties of Relation 1. For Ministers a 1 Thess. 5. 13. b Col. 1. 17. 1. 2. 3. a Mat. 28. ●0 2. For Neighbours Friends 1. b Gal. 6 10. 2. c 2 Cor. 6. last * Ps. 119. 69. 3. d Rom. 12. 2. e Coloss. 4. 5. f Mark 4. 11. g 1 Thes. 5. 22. 1. h 1 Pet. 3 13. i 1 Pet. 2. 12. 2. k Tit. 3. 2 3. 3. l Act 28. 2. 4. 5. 3. For those in the Family 1. Equals c Rom. 12. 10. d Prov. 27. 17. ● Inferiours 1. Ps. 101. 4 5 6 7. 2. f Col. ● 1. g Job 31. 21 ●3 3. h Job 31. 13. 3. Man and wife i 1 Pet. 3. 7. Ephe. 5. ●5 Col. 3. 14. a Eph. 5. 33. b 1 Pet. 2. 19. c Judg. 8 1 2 3 d Phil. 3. 21. Prov. 21. 1. a 1 Pet. 3. 7. b Gen. 20. 16. c 1 Pet. 3. 7. d 1 Cor. 7. 29 31. e Lu 20 35 36. f Judg. 7. 5 7. g Gen. 33. 5. 1. Children h Prov. 22. 6. a Joh. 2. 22. b Prov. 22. 6. c Prov. 22. 15. 1. 2. 3. d Prov. 22. 15. e 2 Sam. 7. 27. f 2 Cor. 12 14 g Mat. 6. 33. h Prov. 31. 30 i 1 Pet. 3. 7. a Eccles. ● 13. b Ezek. 24. 16 18. c 2 Cor. 11. 14. d Eccles 7. 11. 1 Pet. 3. 7.