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A95749 Ekskybalauron: or, The discovery of a most exquisite jewel, more precious then diamonds inchased in gold, the like whereof was never seen in any age; found in the kennel of Worcester-streets, the day after the fight, and six before the autumnal æquinox, anno 1651. Serving in this place, to frontal a vindication of the honour of Scotland, from that infamy, whereinto the rigid Presbyterian party of that nation, out of their coveteousness and ambition, most dissembledly hath involved it. Urquhart, Thomas, Sir, 1611-1660. 1652 (1652) Wing U134; Thomason E1506_1; ESTC R203867 122,679 328

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personate into an inestimable Ollapodrida of immaterial morsels of divers kinds sutable to the very Ambrosian relish of the Heliconian Nymphs that in the Peripetia of this Drammatical exercitation by the inchanted transportation of the eyes and eares of its spectabundal auditorie one would have sworne that they all had looked with multiplying glasses and that like that Angel in the Scripture whose voice was said to be like the voice of a multitude they heard in him alone the promiscuous speech of fifteen several Actors by the various ravishments of the excellencies whereof in the frolickness of a jocound straine beyond expectation the logofascinated spirits of the beholding hearers and auricularie spectators were so on a sudden seazed upon in their risible faculties of the soul and all their vital motions so universally affected in this extremitie of agitation that to avoid the inevitable charmes of his intoxicating ejaculations and the accumulative influences of so powerfull a transportation one of my Lady Dutchess chief Maids of honour by the vehemencie of the shock of those incomprehensible raptures burst forth into a laughter to the rupture of a veine in her body and another young Lady by the irresistible violence of the pleasure unawares infused where the tender receptibilitie of her too too tickled fancie was lest able to hold out so unprovidedly was surprised that with no less impetuositie of ridibundal passion then as hath been told occasioned a fracture in the other young Ladies modestie she not able longer to support the well beloved burthen of so excessive delight and intransing joys of such Mercurial exhilarations through the ineffable extasie of an over-mastered apprehension fell back in a swown without the appearance of any other life into her then what by the most refined wits of theological speculators is conceived to be exe●ced by the purest parts of the separated entelechies of blessed Saints in their sublimest conversations with the celestial hierarchies this accident procured the incoming of an Apothecarie with Restoratives as the other did that of a Surgeon with consolidative medicaments The admirable Crichtoun now perceiving that it was drawing somewhat late and that our occidental rays of Phaebus were upon their turning oriental to the other hemisphere of the terrestrial Globe being withall jealous that the uninterrupted operation of the exuberant diversitie of his jovialissime entertainment by a continuate winding up of the humours there present to a higher yet higher and still higher pitch above the supremest Lydian note of the harmonie of voluptuousness should in such a case through the too intensive stretching of the already-super-elated strings of their imagination with a transcendencie over-reaching Ela and beyond the well-concerted gam of rational equanimitie involve the remainder of that illustrious companie into the sweet Labyrinth and mellifluent aufractuosities of a Lacinious delectation productive of the same inconvenices which befel the two afore named-Ladies whose delicacie of constitution though sooner overcome did not argue but that the same extranean causes from him proceeding of their pathetick alteration might by a longer insisting in an efficacious agencie and unremitted working of all the consecutively-imprinted degrees that the capacity of the patient is able to containe prevaile at last and have the same predominancie over the dispositions of the strongest complexioned males of that splendid society did in his own ordinary wearing-apparel with the countenance of a Prince and garb befitting the person of a so well bred Gentleman and cavalier 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 full of Majesty and repleat with all excogitable civilitie to the amazement of all that beheld his heroick gesture present himself to epilogate this his almost extemporanean Comedie though of five hours continuance without intermission and that with a peroration so neatly uttred so distinctly pronounced and in such elegancie of selected termes expressed by a diction so periodically contexed with Isocoly of members that the matter thereof tending in all humility to beseech the Highnesses of the Duke Prince and Dutchess together with the remanent Lords Ladies Knights Gentlemen and others of both sexes of that honorable convention to vouchsafe him the favour to excuse his that afternoons escaped extravagancies and to lay the blame of the indigested irregularity of his wits excursions and the abortive issues of his disordered brain upon the customarily-dispensed-with priviledges in those Cisalpinal regions to authorize such like impertinences at Carnavalian festivals and that although according to the most commonly received opinion in that Country after the nature of Load-him a game at cards where he that wins loseth he who at that season of the year playeth the fool most egregiously is reputed the wisest man he nevertheless not being ambitious of the fame of enjoying good qualities by vertue of the Antiphrasis of the fruition of bad ones did meerly undergo that emancipatorie task of a so profuse liberty and to no other end embraced the practising of such roaming and exorbitant diversions but to give an evident or rather infallible demonstration of his eternally-bound duty to the house of Mantua and an inviolable testimony of his never to be altered designe in prosecuting all the occasions possible to be laid hold on that can in any manner of way prove conducible to the advancement of and contributing to the readiest means for improving those advantages that may best promove the faculties of making all his choice endeavours and utmost abilities at all times effectual to the long wished for furtherance of his most cordial and endeared service to the serenissime highnesses of my Lord Duke Prince and Dutchess and of consecrating with all addicted obsequiousness and submissive devotion his everlasting obedience to the illustrious Shrine of their joynt commands Then incontinently addressing himself to the Lords Ladies and others of that Rotonda which for his daigning to be its inmate though but for that day might be accounted in nothing inferiour to the great Colisee of Rome or Amphitheater at Neems with a stately carriage and port suitable to so prime a gallant he did cast a look on all the corners thereof so bewitchingly aminable and magnetically efficacious as if in his eys had bin a muster of ten thousand Cupids eagerly striving who should most deeply pierce the hearts of the spectators with their golden darts And truly so it fell out that there not being so as much one arrow shot in vain all of them did love him though not after the same manner nor for the same end for as the Manna of the Arabian desarts is said to have had in the mouths of the Egyptian Israelites the very same tast of the meat they loved best so the Princes that were there did mainly cherish him for his magnanimity and knowledge his Courtliness and sweet behaviour being that for which chiefly the Noblemen did most respect him for his pregnancie of wit and chivalrie in vindicating the honour of Ladies he was honoured by the Knights and the Esquires and other Gentlemen
of the Shires of Innernass and Ross whether joyntly or separately sitting proved the most barbarous and inhumane it being a commonly-received practise amongst their loggerhead stick wisdoms not only to pass these and such like enormities with the foresaid officers but to gratifie them besides for the laying of a burthen upon their neighbours which they should have undergone themselves yea to such a height did their covetousness and hypocrisie reach that the better to ingratiate themselves in the favors of the souldiery for the saving of their pence when the officers out of their laziness would be unwilling to travel fourty or fifty miles from their quarters for the taking up of mantenance or any arreer due of horse and foot-levies they took this savage and unchristian course they would point at any whom they had a peck at pretending he was no good Covenanter and that he favoured toleration and for that cause being both judges and parties themselves would ordaine him under pain of quartering and plundring to advance to the insatiable officers so much money as the debt pretended to be due by those remote inhabitants though meer strangers to him did extend to by which means it ordinarily fell out that the civillest men in all the country and most plyable to good order were the greatest sufferers and the basest the greedyest and the most unworthy of the benefit of honest conversation the onely men that were exempted and had immunities Now when many of these Laird and Lord Kirk-officers had by such unconscionable means and so diametrally opposite to all honour and common honesty acquired great sums of money then was it that like good Simeons of iniquity they had recourse to their brother Levi for framing of Protestations their conscience not serving them to fight for a King that was like to espouse a malignant interest under which cover free from the tempest of war like fruitful brood-geese they did stay at home to hatch young chickens of pecunial interest out of those prodigious egs which the very substance of the commons had laid down to them with a curse to sit upon Yet if for fashion sake at the instigation of inferior officers who were nothing so greedy as they some shew of muster was to be made of souldiers to be sent to Sterlin-leaguer or anywhere else then were these same very men whom out of their pretended zeal to the good cause they had formerly cast either for malignancy or infencibility and in lieu of each of them accepted of fifty or threescore dolars more or less inrolled in their Troops or Companies when for the matter of three or four dolars with the consent of a cup of good Ale and some promise of future plunder they had purchased their good wils to take on with them they approving themselves by such insinuating means good servants in being able by the talent of their three dolars to do the State that service for the which the poor Country-Gentleman must pay threescore and be forced to quit his man to boot Truly those are not the Scotish Colonels whom I intend to commend for valour it being fitter to recommend them to posterity as vipers who to work out a livelihood to themselves have not stuck to tear the very bowels of their mother-country and bury its honor in the dust Such were not those Scotish Col. I formerly mentioned whose great vassalages abroad and enterprises of most magnanimous adventures undertaken and performed by them in other countries might very well make a poorer climate then Scotland enter in competition with a richer soyle Yet seeing the intellectual faculties have their vertues as well as the moral and that learning in some measure is no less commendable then fortitude as those afore-named Scotish men have been famous beyond sea for the military part so might I mention thrice as many moe of that Nation as I have set down of war-like officers who since the yeer one thousand and six hundred have deserved in all those aforesaid countryes of France Italy Spaine Flanders Holland Denmark Germany Pole Hungary and Swedland where they lived great renown for their exquisite abilities in all kind of literature the greatest part of whose names I deem expedient for the present to conceal thereby to do the more honor to some whose magnanimity and other good parts now to commemorate would make one appear in the opinions of many guilty of the like trespass with them that in the dayes of Nero called Rome by its proper name after he had decreed to give it the title of Neroniana Nevertheless being to speak a little of some of them before I lanch forth to cross the seas I must salute that most learned and worthy gentleman and most indeared minion of the Muses Master Alexander Ross who hath written manyer excellent books in Latine and English what in prose what in verse then he hath lived yeers and although I cannot remember all yet to set down so many of them as on a sudden I can call to minde will I not forget to the end the Reader by the perusal of the works of so universal a scholar may reap some knowledge when he comes to read His Virgilius Evangelizans in thirteen several books a peece truly which when set forth with that decorement of plates it is to have in its next edition will evidently shew that he hath apparelled the Evangelists in more splendid garments and royal robes then without prejudice be it spoken his compatriots Buchanan and Jhonstoun have in their Paraphrastick translation of the Psalmes done the King and Prophet David His four books of the Judaick wars intituled De rebus Judaicis libri quatuor couched in most excellent hexameters his book penned against a Jesuite in neat Latine prose called Rasuratonsoris his Chymera Pythagorica contra Lansbergium his Additions to Wollebius and Vrsinus his book called The new planet no planet his Meditations upon predestination his book intituled the pictures of the conscience his Questions upon Genesis his Religions Apotheosis his Melissomachia his Virgilius Triumphans his four curious books of Epigrams in Latin Elegiacks his Mel heliconium his Colloquia plautina his Mystagoguspoeticus his Medicus medicatus his Philosophical touch-stone his Arcana Microcosmi his observations upon Sir Walter Rawley his Marrow of History or Epitome of Sir Walter Rawleigh ' works his great Chronology in the English tongue set forth in folio deducing all the most memorable things that have occurred since the Macedonian war till within some ten or twelve yeers to this time and his many other learned Treatises whose titles I either know not or have forgot Besides all these Volumes Books and Tractates here recited he composed above three hundred exquisite Sermons which after he had redacted them into an order and diction fit for the press were by the merciless fury of Vulcan destroyed all in one night to the great grief of many preachers to whom they would have been every whit as useful as Sir
and the same faith he would like a Hercules amongst so many Myrmidons fal in within the very midst of them so besquatter them on all sides and with the granads of his invincible arguments put the braines of all and each of them in such a fire that they should never be able pump as they would to finde in all the celluls thereof one drop of either reason or learning wherewith to quench it This unequal undertaking of one against so many whereof some were greater courtiers with his Papal Holiness then he shortened his abode at Rome and thereafter did him so much prejudice in his travels through Italy and France that when at any time he became scarce of money to which exigent his prodigality often brought him he could not as before expect an ayuda de costa as they call it or viaticum from any Prince of the territories through which he was to pass because the chanels of their liberality were stopped by the rancour and hatred of his conventual adversaries When nevertheless he was at the lowest ebb of his fortune his learning and incomparable facility in expressing any thing with all the choicest ornaments of and incident varieties to the perfection of the Latine elocution raised him to the dignity of being possessed with the chair of Lipsius and professing humanity in Italy called buone letere in the famous University of Lovan yet like Mercury unapt to fix long in any one place deserting Lovan he repaired to Paris where he was held in exceeding great reputation for his good parts and so universally beloved that both Laicks and Church-men courtiers and Scholars gentlemen and Merchants and almost all manner of people willing to learn some new thing or other for as sayes Aristotle every one is desirous of knowledge were ambitious of the enjoyment of his company and ravished with his conversation For besides that the matter of his discourse was strong sententious and witty he spoke Latine as if he had been another Livy or Salustius nor had he been a native of all the three countryes of France Italy and Germany could he have exprest himself as still he did when he had occasion with more selected variety of words nimbler volubility of utterance or greater terity for tone phrase and accent in all the three Languages thereto belonging I have seen him circled about at the Louvre with a ring of French Lords and gentlemen who hearkned to his discourse with so great attention that none of them so long as he was pleased to speak would offer to interrupt him to the end that the pearles falling from his mouth might be the more orderly congested in the several treasures of their judgements the ablest advocates barristers or counselors at law of all the parlement of Paris even amongst those that did usually plead en la chambre doree did many times visit him at his house to get his advice in hard debatable points He came also to that sublime pitch of good diction even in the French tongue that there having past by vertue of a frequent intercourse several missives in that idiom betwixt him and le sieur de Balzak who by the quaintest Romancealists of France and daintiest complementers of all its lushions youth was almost uncontrollably esteemed in eloquence to have surpassed Ciceron the straine of Seatons letters was so high the fancy so pure the words so well connexed and the cadence so just that Balzak infinitely taken with its fluent yet concise Oratory to do him the honor that was truly due unto him most lovingly presented him with a golden pen in acknowledgement of Seatons excelling him both in Retorick and the art of perswasion which gift proceeding from so great an oratour and for a supereminency in that faculty wherein himself without contradiction was held the chiefest of this and all former ages that ever were born in the French Nation could not chuse but be acounted honorable Many learned books were written by this Seaton in the Latine tongue whose titles to speak ingenuously I cannot hit upon There was another Scotish man named Cameron who within these few yeers was so renowned for learning over all the provinces of France that besides his being esteemed for the faculties of the minde the ablest man of all that Country he was commonly designed because of his universal reading by the title of the walking Liberary by which he being no less known then by his own name he therefore took occasion to set forth an excellent book in Latine and that in folio intituled Bibliotheca movens which afterwards was translated into the English Language To mention those former Scotish men and forget their compatriot Barclay the Author of Argenis Icon animorum and other exquisite Treatises translated out of Latine into the Languages almost of every country where use is made of printing would argue in me a great neglect it shall suffice nevertheless for this time that I have named him for I hope the Reader will save me a labour and extoll his praises to as great hight when he shall be pleased to take the paines to peruse his works Yet that the learning of the travelers of the Scotish Nation may not seem to be tyed to the climate of France although all Scots by the privilege of the laws of that kingdome be naturalized French and that all the French kings since the dayes of Charlemaine which is about a thousand yeers since by reason of their fidelity to that Crown have put such real confidence in the Scots that whither soever the King of France goeth the Scots are nearest to him of any and the chief guard on which he reposeth for the preservation of his royal person there was a Scotish man named Melvil who in the yeer 1627. had a pension of King Philip the fourth of six hundred ducats a yeer for his skilfulness in the Hebrew Caldean Syraick Aethiopian Samaritan and Arabick tongues beyond all the Christians that ever were born in Europe The service he did do the Spanish King in those languages especially the Arabick and Caldean which after great search made over all his ample territories and several other Kingdoms besides for some able man to undergo the task could not be got performed by any but him was to translate into Latine or Spanish some few books of those six hundred great volumes taken by Don Juan de Austria at the battel of Lepanto from the great Turk which now lye in the great Library of the magnifick palace of the Escurial some seven leagues Westward from Madrid and otherwayes called San lorenço el real Of those and many other mental abilities of that nature he gave after that most excellent proofs both at Rome Naples and Venice That most learned Latine book in folio Treating of all the Mathematical Arts and Sciences which was written by that Scotish gentleman Sempil resident in Madrid sheweth that Scotish spirits can produce good fruits even in hot climates Another named Gordon of the
a number for how many soever that could have looked out but for one day like gentlemen and given him but one hundred and fifty pounds Sterlin without any need of a key●or opening the gate to enter through the Temple of Vertue which in former times was the only way to honour they had a scale from him whereby to ascend unto the platformes of Vertue which they treading underfoot did slight the ordinary passages and to take the more sudden possession of the Temple of honour went upon obscure by-paths of their own towards some secret Angiports and dark posterndoors which were so narrow that few of them could get in till they had left all their gallantry behind them yet such being their resolution that in they would and be worshipful upon any tearms they misregarded all formerly-used steps of promotion accounting them but unnecessary and most rudely rushing in unto the very Sanctuary they immediately hung out the Orange colours to testifie their conquest of the honour of Knight-Baronet Their King nevertheless not to staine his Royal dignity or to seem to merit the imputation of selling honor to his subjects did for their money give them land and that in so ample a measure that every one of his Knight-Baronets had for his hundred fifty pounds Sterlin heritably disponed unto him six thousand good and sufficient Acres of Nova Scotia ground which being but at the rate of six pence an Acre could not be thought very dear considering how prettily in the respective parchments of disposition they were bounded and designed fruitful corne-land watered with pleasant rivers running alongst most excellent and spacious Meadows nor did there want abundance of Oaken groves in the midst of very fertil plaines for if they wanted any thing it was the Scrivener or Writers fault for he gave order as soon as he received the three thousand Scots marks that there should be no defect of quantity or quality in measure or goodness of land and here and there most delicious gardens and orchards with whatever else could in matter of delightful-ground best content their fancies as if they had made purchase amongst them of the Elysian fieldes or Mahumets Paradise After this manner my Lord Sterlin for a while was very noble according to the rate of Sterlin money was as twelve other Lords in the matter of that frankness of disposition which not permitting him to dodge it upon inches ells better and worse made him not stand to give to each of his champions territories of the best and the most and although there should have happened a thousand Acres more to be put in the Charter or writing of disposition then was agreed upon at first he cared not half a piece to the Clerk was able to make him dispense with that But at last when he had inrolled some two or three hundred Knights who for their hundred and fifty peeces each had purchased amongst them several millions of Neocaledonian Acres confirmed to them and theirs for ever under the great seal the affixing whereof was to cost each of them but thirty peeces more finding that the society was not like to become any more numerous and that the ancient gentry of Scotland esteemed of such a whimsical dignity as of a disparagement rather then addition to their former honor he bethought himself of a course more profitable for himself and the future establishment of his own state in prosecuting whereof without the advice of his Knights who represented both his Houses of Parliament Clergy and all like an absolute King indeed disponed heritably to the French for a matter of five or six thousand pounds English money both the dominion and propriety of the whole continent of that kingdom of Nova Scotia leaving the new Baronets to search for land amongst the Selenits in the Moon or turn Knights of the Sun so dearly have they bought their Orange Riban which all circumstances considered is and will be no more honorable to them or their posterity then it is or hath been profitable to either What I have said here is not by way of digression but to very good purpose and pertinent to the subject in hand for as armes and arts commonly are paralleled and that Pallas goes armes with a Helmet I held it expedient lest the list of the Scholars set down in this place should in matter of preeminence be too far over-peered by the roll of the souldiers above recited that my Lord Sterlin should here represent the place of a King for the literatory part as well as there did the great uncircumcised Garne for the military and bring nova Scotia in competition with Bucharia Besides this Lord Alexander Drummon and Wishart have published very good Poems in English Nor is Master Ogilvy to be forgot whose translation of Virgil and of the fables of Aesop in very excellent English verses most evidently manifesteth that the perfection of the English tongue is not so narrowly confined but that it may extend it self beyond the natives on this side of Barwick I might have named some more Scotish Poets both in English and Latine but that besides as I often told I intend not to make a compleat enumeration of all there is a Latin book extant which passeth by the name of Deliciae poetarum Scotorum wherein the Reader may finde many even of those that have lived of late yeers whom I have here ommitted as I have done several other able men of the Scotish Nation in other faculties such as Master David Chalmers who in Italy penned a very good book and that in neat Latine treating of the Antiquities of Scotland and had it printed at Paris as also one Simson who wrote in Latine four exquisite books of Hieroglyphicks and one Hart in the City of London at this present who wrote the Fort royal of Scripture c. The excellency of Doctor William Davison in Alchymy above all the men now living in the world whereof by his wonderful experiments he giveth daily proof although his learned books published in the Latine tongue did not evidence it meriteth well to have his name recorded in this place and after him Doctor Leeth though in time before him designed in Paris where he lived by the name of Letu who as in the practise and theory of Medicine he excelled all the Doctors of France so in testimony of the approbation he had for his exquisiteness in that faculty he left behinde him the greatest estate of any of that profession then as the vast means possest by his sons and daughters there as yet can testifie Amongst those eminent Doctors of Physick I ought not to forget Doctor Fraser who was made Doctor at Toulouse with the universal approbation and applause of that famous University and afterwards succeeded to Doctor Jhonstoun's place of Physician in ordinary to the late King There is another Scotish gentleman likewise of the name of Wallace in France called Devalois who enjoyeth and hath so done these