him a seal to the promise of pardon and eternal life though he did not testifie it by giving in extraordinary joys He looks not so much at fits of passion as at the steady bent and tenour of the Soul The truest Communion with God is to enjoy the Communication of his Graces whereby we are made conformable to him we may enjoy the saving influences of his Spirit when we cannot feel his more abundant consolations Though this Ordinance be not at present joyous yet may afterwards yield the peaceable fruits of righteousness to those that are conversant therein It cannot be well known what Grace we have received further measures of which are the holy Spirits accompanying those means being the great benefit we are apt to expect till we come to the exercise of it in duty and against temptation But oh how much cause have I to rejoyce in his love and goodness to render him hearty thanks who might have left me as well as others to my self for his quickning and refreshment for his satisfying me so abundantly with the fatness of his house and making me drink of the river of his pleasure especially now I find and oh that I could more and more such real benefit received by it my soul more deeply broken and humbled under the sense of sin and that become more loathsom hateful burdensom to me My heart truely thankful for what I have enjoyed and sorrowful I have enjoyed no more more strongly engaged and resolved to inward and universal holiness my Faith in Christ more encreased and setled my love to him more inflamed my Soul strengthned and emboldned to undergo any thing for him my spiritual delight and joy in him raised and lessened to other things my esteem and valuation of the Ordinance heightned my Graces in it exercised my desires after full enjoyment of God and Christ in Glory more enlarged If he were pleased to kill me he would not have received a burnt-offering and a Meat-offering at my hands neither would he have shewed me all these things nor as at this time have given me to experience such things as these Oh that I may always retain a thankful sense of all his benefits Oh how much am I beholden to thee my God I have been praising of thee but nothing to what I ought or what thou deserv'st Oh how can I cease to magnifie thee for what I am and have for the use of thy creatures and thy blessing with them for every crum much more for Christ that foundation mercy that hath all mercies folded up in him and entail'd unto him that sweetens and sanctifies every mercy for this Feast on his Body and Blood for the joys of thy house and the viands of heaven for any measure of life and affection raisedness and comfort grace and goodness Bless the Lord O my Soul and all that is within me bless his holy name While I live I will praise thee I will sing praise unto my God while I have a being and what is here wanting in thy due praise I will pay hereafter in everlasting Hallelujahs Rest not in the work done though done never so well Beware lest by spiritual pride and future negligence thou lose the things thou hast wrought Had I done all as well as was commanded me I would say I am an unprofitable servant I had done but my duty but O how short come I of it Oh let not the Lord lay to my charge my want of due preparation my coldness and indifferency distraction and unbelief my so many failings before and at the Ordinance that my heart was in no better frame that I took no more paines with it to fit it for thy self that it was no more broken for my sins when the Minister broke the Bread that when I took it I was so dull so dead and did no better reach forth the hand of Faith to lay hold on and apply Christ and his benefits so play'd the hypocrite before thee and my fellow Communicants that when the Wine was poured forth and I saw how Christ shed his Blood for sinners I scarce dropt a tear for the cause from a heart sensible of my sins and his love unto my Soul when I took and drank the Cup I did not remember him as I ought that my heart was not so seriously intent and reverent so deeply affected sutable to the importance and excellency of the duty and the Majesty of him with whom I had to do Spend some time in strengthning and confirming thy holy purposes and resolutions O that some fruit may be seen of this day till the solemnity return that the thoughts and meditations I had there may be so strongly so deeply fixed and rooted in the bottom of my heart that nothing may be able to pluck them up that I may be so sensibly possest with the perswasions that Christ is in and united to me that when a Temptation comes and knocks for enterance I may readily naturally say I am not he that I was before the property of the house is quite changed I live yet not I but Christ in me I was indeed a common Inne to entertain all-Comers but now I am become the sole Habitation of the High and Holy One he expects to be honourably treated like unto himself he will have no competitors or unclean thing in his house I cannot arise and open to you Oh how shall I treat him who hath taken up his abode with me shall I take the members of Christ and make them the members of an Harlot defile that body wherein he hath chosen to reside force him out of his habitation by any impurity offend him by any noysom thoughts or unsavoury breath out of my mouth shall those hands that have received the sacred Elements work deceit those Eyes that have been filled with tears at the Lords Table be fill'd with envy those teeth that have eaten Holy Bread â—grind the face of the poor those lips that have touched the Sacramental Cup salute an Harlot the mouth that hath drunk consecrated wine be full of rotten discourse shall I be so greedy of the World as to forget to retire to converse with my Saviour shall I so perplex my self in business as to omit to pray to meditate to sing praises unto thee No I am not at my own dispose I have sworn and I will perform that I will keep thy righteous judgments and often consider how deeply I am obliged to him that hath paid my debt Oh I can never parallel his love yet let me shew my self thankful I can do nothing satisfactory but let me do something gratulatory He gave himself a sin-offering for me let me give my self a thank-offering to him offer up my self a living facrifice unto my Redeemer who offered up himself a dying Sacrifice for my Redemption Beware of Crucifying Christ afresh To them that believe he is precious now I have begun to celebrate the Marriage oh let me never throw off the
of an ungrateful world was so mindful of your good and comfort to arm establish and refresh you and will you neglect dis-esteem contemn it doth not the benefit of my passion without your desert plead for the constant meditation of it without your scandal The frequent faithful remembrance of what I did and suffered for you is my chief request and your only requital and yet do you distaste what I â—mbraced and endure not to think of what I refused not to endure loath you the cup of Salvation that cost me a cup of Astonishment Have I left the Glory of my Father to be cloathed with and dwell in flesh Led a life of suffering undergone a shameful painful accursed death rose again ascended prepared mansions taken possession for you where I plead your cause and will come ere long to absolve you before all the world and with whom you shall be for ever Have I given such costly evidences of my love unto you and love you not to do this in remembrance of me Do But for thee dear Saviour I had been for ever undone for thee then and for thy sake what is it that I should not do Thy desires are my Injunctions there 's Authority enough in thy love to do thy pleasure Since thou would have no nature but mine I will have no will but thine When once signified by command upon my obligation I should upon my Fealty to thee the King of the Church and Soveraign as well as Saviour of my Soul I ought I may I must not dispute nor delay I dare not but must Do else how must I be look'd upon when the King commands all his loving Subjects to take the Oath of Allegiance and I stay away and refuse Do I not publickly disown him for my Soveraign who hath enjoyn'd the Celebration of this as an evidence and symbol of my Relation to and communion with him Is not this appointed for a memorial of his death whereby he delivered his people and destroyed their enemies transcendently to us what the Passeover was to the Jews and the neglect of it more provoking yet the man that is unclean and is not in a journey and forbeareth to keep the Passeover at the time appointed when he might and ought eat it even the same soul shall be cut off from his people because he brought not the offering of the Lord in his appointed season that man shall bear his sin There 's a punishment annexed to the neglect as well as ill performance of it he that eats irreverently is guilty of prophaning the Lords Body and he that eats not of despising it and of preferring his lusts before him the one eats damnation to himself and the other by not eating judges himself to be in a damnable State 'T is dangerous staying in that condition wherein we judge our selves unmeet society for Christ if I cannot partake of his Supper here how can I think my self fit to feast with him in Heaven or hope to look on his face with comfort there and take no pleasure to behold remember come near have any thing to do with him here will not his presence be most terrible then to whom his memory is no way delightful now Am I troubled for neglect of other duties and not of this when Christs Items at the last day are made up of sins of omission Dare I pick and chuse when whosoever shall keep the whole Law yet offend in one point is guilty of all This Not to climb a Cross or undergo a bitter passion for thy sake I should not think much to do that who hast done so much more for me Not to be had to a Scaffold but to come to thy Table not to go to Slaughter but a Feast not to Bleed or Burn but to Eat and Drink and that not Bread of Affliction or Water of Adversity which flags the Spirit but such Bread and Wine as confirms and comforts my Heart Not a Mourners Bread Tears or a Martyrs Cup Blood but a Saviours fare Blessed Wine and Bread yea in them what both is and makes blessed his body and blood meat and drink bread of life and well of life that both joys my heart and saves my soul Didst thou on the Cross drink Vinegar made infinitely more tart by my sins for me and shall not I at thy Table drink Wine for my self made infinitely sweeter with the blood it conveys Didst thou drink a Cup of wrath and shall not I drink the cup of Blessing Eat the bread of affliction and shall not I eat the bread of life suffer thy passion and shall not I enjoy it Didst thou stretch out thy hands on the Cross and shall mine be withered and shrunk towards thy Table Hadst thou bid me do some great thing for procuring so great a good that there had been between the service and reward no disproportion should I not endeavour'd to do it how much more when thou bidst me eat and live I am not saved but by thy Body I shall be damned without thy Blood Didst thou offer them for me on the Cross and shall I not take the pledge from thee at thy Supper Dost thou give me a Title to them and shall I bar my self of possession rob my self of thy mercy and my right of no less then the price of my Redemption Dost thou give me the purchase in thy Blood and shall I deny my self the Seal in thy Church Dare I be guilty of so great a Robbery and Rebellion to violate thy will and seal to steal at once thy Bread and Cup and Scepter against thy express Will and Testament to take the Bread and Cup out of my own hand and the Scepter out of thine to deprive my soul of thy Body and Blood and thee of thy Authority by thy grace I will never but observe as thou appointest If this be thy command O Saviour I am a Rebel as much to my good as thy Law a damned Rebel if I do not this In Remembrance I blush Lord to see my self need thy memento Have I a room for the trash of the world and none for thee memory for what I list and none for what I should O thou that hast so done thy marvellous works that they ought to be had in everlasting remembrance whose name is wonderful and all thy works as thy name and this above all thy works can I ever forget thee can I forget my self so much that breaths not a moment on Earth or out of Hell without thee If I forget thee O Saviour let my tongue cleave to the roof of my mouth If I remember not thee let my right hand forget her cunning Sure that harp had never known the tune of joy nor hand to do with harp hadst not thou put a world all out in order again and set all in tune And is that all when I owe a thousand lives unto thee to require not my Body but my Mind to say Remember not to Dye
for me but to forbid thy Memory to Dye in me O thou loving and Blessed above all Beloveds when thy passion is engraven by thy own hand in an Holy Mysterie for my mind to wear shall not I keep this memorial Shall I not wear thy Ring who am so ready to wear a Death's-head to preserve alive the memory of a dead Friend O that I may ever keep this Manna that came down from Heaven not in a Leaden but Golden pot not in a dull barren bareley contemplative but humble tender active pretious memory which moves all good affections to thee and promoves all good abilities for thee Such a memory will mind and do all Duty admire and love thee obey endure do and suffer for thee establish Faith excite Repentance inflame Love maintain Constancy I cannot but repent believe and love to the end if thou be in my mind If I fail payment of any duty to thee or man it is because I do not remember thee Of me Of my Death and your redemption by it This Sacrament then is an obelisk to the eternal memory of thy passion so oft as I neglect it what do I but pull down this Pyramid of everlasting date set up in the Church for a solemn memorial of thy death and bury thee and thy Merits as the Jews did thy Body but in a worser grave not in a Garden but Desart a grave of Oblivion Wretch am I that have need of such an help to my memory and spur to my Duty as both a Command and a Sacrament it casts reproach on me O Saviour that thou shouldst give thy Body for me and I scarce give my mind to thee that I should have so great a room in thy heart and thou so hardly get any in mine that thou shouldst be more ready to bleed for me then I to think of thee Dear Jesus thou didst empty all thy veins for me shall not I find a vessel to preserve thy precious Blood Do I not spill what thou shed if I let it run out of my memory yet art thou put to it to find me both blood and mind and when thou hast done all that out of remembrance of me lest it should be forgotten ordain'st a Sanction and Sacrament saying Do this in remembrance of me But more wretch I if I do not so do for Lord if I do thee honour dost thou not do me favour for it If I give thee glory is it more my duty then felicity to do it If thy Sacrament is it not my benefit Receive I not great honour in it Reap I not good benefits by it conveys it not the Blood Royal of Heaven into me Am I not related to Brother of Christ Heir and Prince of Heaven by vertue of that Blood Is not the Godhead bodily in him and is not this Body mystically in me and I near allyed to God by the Communion of that Body And can he want Demeans that is such a Prince Is not the Earth thy gift and Heaven in thy power O thou Son and Heir of all And have I not thy Spirit thy flesh to pledge for all the conveyance sealed in thy Blood and thy Merits made over and assured in thy Body O Lord I am so much concern'd in honour and estate to do what thou commandest that if I consider my self I shall do it to thy memory in remembrance of me as well as thee Wherever God hath bestow'd a vital principle Faith whereby the Just live he affords nourishment to sustain it and an inclination and attractive faculty towards it Christ Crucified is as the cause of our new birth so the food which sustains and preserves us in it unto whose Body and Blood there must needs be as proportionable an appetite in a new Christian as to Milk in an Infant that being more nourishable then milk and Faith more vital to desire it then Nature Oh! I know not what grace and comfort I have lost that others have found in the Consciencious use of this If there be any thing in the lively discoveries of the evil and desert of sin the wrath and love of God the cordials of the Gospel by frequenting it might it not have been much better with me in my Spiritual condition is not this great Hypecrisie and Dissimulation to complain of the hardness of my heart and not apply the Blood of Christ to soften it of the prevalencie of corruptions and not bring them to his Cross to subdue them of my timerous spirit and not come where God secures me and gives evidence for the discharge of his covenant and promise that God is departing when I stand at a distance and will not come nigh him is withdrawn from my Soul when I withdraw from my Dutie that I am a stranger to spiritual joy when I will not come to draw water out of the wells of Salvation of die weakness of grace and not use of all means of strengthening it can I refuse my food yet be nourished grow in grace and neglect the means not grow and be guiltless live in a known sin by neglecting a plain commanded Dutie and expect the rewards of obedience may not partial obedience to Gods commands well increase my doubts of his favour Is not this to slight and disesteem a firm conveyance of all Christs purchased benefits here offered and assured to Believers and then think not much Soul if thou go without them for ever who art also so unwilling to bind thy self to thankfulness and obedience for them Meals which are for nourishment must be often 't is not told me how often I should eat or drink the sense and feeling of the wants of my food directs me to makes me do it often Am I not apt to grow dull lukewarm cold to and in duty to contract guilt blot my evidences disturb my peace to forget him and his matchless love Is he so much in my serious thoughts as he deserves Is it enough to have some accasional thoughts of him Do I not complain that I love and think of him no more can apply him no better have so little of him am so insenble of his kindness and affection to his members Is it not a sin and shame I no more solemnly dwell in meditation upon him am no more in praising of rejoycing in him Do I not often need so great an help to soften my heart to renew my repentance to strengthen and confirm my Faith Hope and Resolutions to increase inflame my love and thankfulness fix my thoughts more solemnly upon him apply him get and maintain more intimate communion with him closer knit my soul to him and his members Is it not a sad sign I perform no Duties as and to those ends I ought but out of custom without expecting therefore without finding any great advantage from them Are the consolations of God small unto me is it not a sign when I was there I miss'd of the benefit Have I not cause to repent of
niggardliness unto inconsiderateness of the worth fearlesness of the loss of my pretious Soul caring more for the Body then it or others not troubled for such as are negligent poisoners murderers of theirs Not sufficiently convinced of humbled for the corruption of my nature mind conscience will affections of the evil of sin and lying under the wrath of God hiding excusing lessening of not making that narrow search after not being grieved for my sins in any proportion to their multitude and greatness as considering that wretched injustice follie and unkindness I have expressed by them loving darkness hating the light receiving the grace of God in vain turning it into wantonness crucifying the Son of God afresh tempting grieving the Holy Spirit hardly forsaking my beloved sin for thy sake who hast freely given thy only Sow for mine That carefulness that clearing of my self that indignation that fear that vehement desire that zele that revenge that watchfulness resolving striving against sin improving all advantages for avoiding and subduing it I find not that is wrought in those who sarrow after a godly sort nor applying my self with all earnestness to the onely means of pardon end reconciliation in the Gospel Time and strength would fail me to repeat how oft I am partaker of Family National Church other mens sins by setting an ill example provoking consenting to conniving at countenancing permitting sin where I might correct or hinder it hating my brother in my heart â—y suffering sin upon him Delightful societie with evil doers taking pleasure in the cause of my humiliation to see them pave their way to Hell with their own â—ands making that matter of sport which nothing but the dearest drop of the hearts â—lood of God could expiate laughing â—â—t that which makes damned souls shed â—ivers of tears they shall be damned that â—ave pleasure in unrighteousness By not â—eeking the things of Christ as my own not preferring Jerusalem above my chieâ— joy not having the care of the Church lying upon me My heart trembles noâ— for fear of the Ark nor is my soul vexeâ— from day to day with their unlawfuâ— deeds among whom I live Oh how little do I mourn for the suffering of others for the signs of Gods anger for the sins 〈◊〉 the times when do I go apart and mounâ— for Englands crying abominations or looâ— upon London a sinful Citie and weep ovâ—â— it And oh the infirmities imperfection iniquities of my holy things Oh hoâ— much carelesness unpreparedness impenitency unbelief pride hypocrisie uâ— spiritualness earthliness formalitie slightness deadness heartlesness distraction indisposition weariness want of relish attends my attendance on so great a Majestie Unanswerable walking resting 〈◊〉 the meer outside of duty when I do not eâ—joy Communion with thee in them And dare such a guilty abominable sâ—ner sit down with thee at thy table such Dog that hath so often returned to his wâ—mit go and take that which is so holy such a Swine wallowing in the mire haâ— to do with those precious pearls that hath already so often trampled them under my feet carelesly neglecting or unworthily receiving those holy misteries rather defying them then adoring thee by bringing such troops of my Saviours professed Enemies unrepented sins along with me as if I came not to commemorate but to renew his Passion to crucifie him afresh Oh I have much reason to fear I am guilty of the body and blood of the Lord by earing and drinking unworthily in that I have not hungered and thirsted after nor partaken of it so often as my necessities and opportunities required nor approached it with such a solemn Preparation Examination Humiliation and cleansing the secrets of my heart from all sin nor renewed the Covenant-Conditions Faith and Repentance nor received it with that reverent behaviour and those inward dispositions nor been so especially careful in making good my Covenant Engagements and Resolutions as becomes a worthy Communicant Oh how can such a loathsom wretch go to be entertained by thee in so near a Communion that cannot expect that am below the least good look from thy gracious eye Oh how dare such a vile miscreant presume to drink of the Cup of Blessing who have deserved such a curse from thy hand as that thou shouldest hurry me to thy Bar of Justice and not admit me to the Seals of the Covenant of Grace to be covered with shame and confusion of face while thy Children come with boldness and present themselves before thee array'd in the righteousness of thy Son whilst they are lifting up their heads with joy knowing the time of celebrating their Redemption draweth nigh I may be hiding my self in the Dens and Rocks of the Mountains saying fall on me and hide me from the face of him that sits upon the Throne Dragged away by cursed Fiends to the place of Torment with hideous scrieks to an innumerable company of Devils and Damned Souls instead of going to the house of God the assembly of his people with the voice of joy and gladness with a multitude that keep holy day While the Sun of Righteousness arises with healing in his wings unto those that fear thy name thy wrath may burn against me as fire and consume me as stubble The day of joy and gladness feasting and rejoycing sacrifice attonement to thy sincere servants may be a day of wrath and trouble darkness and gloominess distress and desolation to me while they with joy of heart are saying come let us go unto the house of the Lord oh our feet shall stand within thy Gates O Sion thy Courts O God! I the great day of his wrath is come and who shall be able to stand In stead of holding out to me the golden Scepter thou mightest break me with a Rod of Iron and dash me in pieces like a Potter's vessel while they are rejoycing and giving honour to thee at the Supper I might lie under the wrath of the Lamb lifting up mine eyes in Hell begging a drop of water to cool my tongue I might see them sit down with the King at his table and my self thrust out into that place where is nothing but weeping wailing and gnashing of teeth Thou art ready to entertain those that are bidden but I am not worthy for making light of thy provision and invitation preferring the things of the world before it thou mayest justly say I shall never tast of thy Supper or if I go it might be not for the better but for the worse I might meet with a frown instead of a smile a blow a breach a curse instead of a blessing Thou mayest in stead of bread give me a stone for the Cup of the New Testment a Cup of wrath and Trembling Thou mayst turn my heart into a stone instead of turing my heart of stone into an heart of flesh The bread of life may be to me a stone of stumbling and a rock of offence to fall on me and grind me to
powder For my going aside from thee and defiling my self the wine that comforts and makes worthy Receivers fruitful in grace may be unto me as the water of Jealousie bitter within my bowels causing my belly to swell and my thigh to rot nd I may be a curse among the people His blood might be lay'd to my charge for my condemnation sealing up all my other fins instead of being sprinkled upon my Conscience to humble me for and cleanse me from all sin Behold I am vile viler then the earth but look upon me in thy Son and thou wilt love me and be well pleased with me mine only hope is in that grace and mercy made known in and thorow him I have broken thy commands but he hath fulfil'd them affronted thy Justice but he hath satisfied it deserved thy wrath but he hath endur'd it the chastisement of my peace was upon him let the merit of his righteousness be upon me and by his stripes let me be healed His Blood is my onely refuge oh let it be my Attonement or I perish eternally Wherefore didst thou shed it but to save sinners Remember not what I have done against thee but what he hath done and suffered for me Oh when I consider thy greatness and my unworthiness thy purity and my uncleanness thy glorie and my shame I am confounded and discouraged but when I consider thy mercy and wisdom bountie and goodness readiness to forgive and desire to impart thy self unto thy servants then I am encouraged to come with boldness unto thee Thou never despis'd him that call'd upon thee or forsook any that abode in thy fear It was never known that any who trusted in thee were ever confounded Oh respect not the greatness of my offences but of thy goodness though I have so often broken my part of that Covenant the Sacrament Seals yet be thou pleased to make good thine to be merciful to my unrighteousness and to remember my sins my iniquities no more Thou knowest how intolerable a thing it is to lie under thy wrath to all eternitie and therefore lovest to do miracles of mercie because thou lovest not that a sinner should perish Have mercie upon me according to the multitude of thy tender mercies blot out my transgressions wash me throughly from mine iniquities and cleanse me from all my defilements with the merit and virtue of that Blood which thou hast so abundantly shed for penitent sinners that I may with an undefiled soul eat of the purest sacrifice the Lamb slain from the beginning so I shall have no spot in me for which thou wilt judge me at thy Table or condemn me at thy Tribunal Being in Christ reconciled unto me oh give further evidences of thy fatherly affection by bestowing a double portion of thy grace upon me now thou callest me to this Ordinance and who is sufficient for these things I have neither a meet Sacrifice to offer nor a meet vessel to receive thee I know not what to say or do how to pray or receive prepare or behave my self not sufficient of my self to think any thing as of my self but my sufficiency is of thee the preparation of the heart and answer of the tongue is from thee the God the promiser the Giver of grace as well as glory that invites all to come unto thee with assurance of finding with and receiving from thee whatsoever is requisite for their refreshment support and comfort ho every one that thirsteth come ye to the waters and he that hath no money come ye buy and eat yea come buy wine and milk without monie and without price Thou preparest a table for us in this wilderness where we eat of thy own Bread and drink of thy own Cup omittest no expression of tender love to treat us as a most indulgent Father But shall the time of receiving come before thou come into my soul to stir up thy graces in me Ganst thou that so loved me who was of no worth while yet in my sins as to die for me neglect me in thee shall I whose only hope is to be saved by Christ be sent away with the guilt instead of the comfort of his Blood Oh of his fulness let me receive and grace for grace let thy Spirit help mine infirmities thy grace be sufficient for me thy strength be made perfect more eminently manifest in weakness Array me with the righteousness of the Saints put upon me the Lord Jesus let me be found having on the Wedding-garment at the Wedding-supper such a preparation of Soul as may qualifie me for it such a degree of reverence and humility saving knowledge godly sorrow renewed repentance new obedience lively faith unfeigned love joy and thankefulness holy desires self-denial sutable solemn heavenly meditations as becomes a worthy Communicant Oh thou true food of my Soul receive me who am to receive thee quicken me with thy Spirit feed me with thy Flesh satisfie me with thy Blood vouchsafe me thy Grace communicate to me thy Nature let me receive life from thee to act and live unto thee who measurest not thy gifts by our petitions or desertss but our wants and thy own mercy Earnest Supplication for Requisite Qualifications TO go to that Ordinance which requires all imaginable liveliness and activity with dull and cloudy affections will be my sin and an aggravation of it if through want of diligent endeavour to get my Soul affected and inflam'd by stirring up the graces of God in me and whither shall I go for this but unto thee the author and finisher of them how shall I do it but by thee Oh do it for me Holy Reveronce and Humility Affect my heart with an awful reverence and selfbasement upon my so near approach unto thee in this solemn Ordinance towards the greatness of thy Majestie with whom I there come to renew my Covenant towards the excellencie of thy Son whom I come to receive into my Soul towards the holiness of thy Spirit whose assiance I hope for and by whom I come there to be establisht in my Union and Communion with Christ and his Members Oh how durst I who am nothing but folly and infirmitie misery and sin shame and death presume to come so nigh for behold the Heaven of Heavens cannot contain thee unless thou hadst invited and commanded it If so much Sanctity Reverence and Devotion was requisite as to the Ark the Temple the receiving thy Law Oh how shall I behave my self now I go to receive thy very self or Communicate with thee that deserves not to come before thee Oh how Humble should I be who am to receive a gift of Free Grace Was he Humble that was all Purity and shall I be proud who am so defiled The high and lofty One dwells not in a haughty heart but with him that is of a contrite humble spirit not will he that humbled himself to the death be taken into a proud Soul Oh that I
so cause me to feed on digest improve his body and blood having the same expectation of Spiritual and Eternal life from him that I have of temporal life from my food Let me eat not only the Bread of the Lord but the Bread which the Lord that as by my senses I receive â—he Elements to my Corporal so by faith 〈◊〉 may receive and apply him to my Spiriâ—â—al nourishment Let the Ordinance be a â—â—vely resemblance remembrance and â—pplication of the sufferings and earnest of the Supper of the Lamb. Let Christ be 〈◊〉 lively set forth as if Crucified before by eyes dying for me that beholding â—mbracing and even putting my fingers â—nto the print of his nails and feet and â—hrusting my hand into his side so fully â—erswaded of his suffering for me that I â—â—ay not be faithless but believing saying â—y Lord and my God he loved me and â—ave himself for me my beloved is mine â—nd I am his O that I may so touch him â—s may find and feel strength peace virâ—ue come from him and be healed of all â—â—y uncleanness that they may not be â—nto death but unto the glory of thy â—ercyâ— in pardoning and grace in purifying 〈◊〉 polluted a Wretch That it may be he food the feast of my graces the poiâ—â—on the funeral of my corruptions Let â—â—e so feed on his blessed Bodie and bathe â—â—y soul in his pretious Blood that my Soul may magnifie the Lord and mâ—â— Spirit rejoyce in God my Saviour whoâ—â— having not seen I may love in whâ—â— though now I see him not yet believing 〈◊〉 may rejoyce with joy unspeakable and fuâ—â— of glory Circumcise my Heart to loâ—â— thee with all my Soul Love and witâ— all my strength Let my hearâ— be ravisht with this infinite merciâ—â— in thee to sinful miserable man in cotriving and giving so glorious a Reddeemer and Redemption to save him and now in presenting us with such special Seals of his love and admitting uâ—â—â— into so near so holy a Communion 〈◊〉 For this let me be dissolv'd into lovâ— to thee and thy Son and to man foâ— his sake and into a steadfast vow of lifâ— and death to thy service that I will give and forgive do and suffer any thing foâ— thee Let me be fill'd with holy raptures joys and hopes in so great a goodness who having done this will deâ—â— me nothing and maugre the rage and malice of hell not see my soul lost foâ— whom all this is done Oh let me meet with strong endearments of Affections melting and flowing over toâ—ards thee languishing with desires enjoy thee even turn'd into made 〈◊〉 of love for thee that I may be the â—isciple whom thou lovest and laid in â—y bosom Oh deal with me as thou â—ften dost with those that draw near to â—â—ee though I burn not with so hot a â—ame yet through thy grace I crave it â—f thee that I may participate with â—nd be numbred among such fervent â—overs If I cannot say I am sick of Love â—et am sick that I cannot love thee â—here wilt thou give me thy love â—dmission to more familiar fellowship â—earâ—r manifestation sensible feeling â—nd assurance of thy love and affectiâ—n unto me that I am beloved of â—hee Give me grace to love the Lord â—esus in sincerity let him dwell in my â—eart by Faith and Love that being â—â—oted and grounded in Love I may be â—ble to comprehend with all Saints â—hat is the breadth and length and â—epth and heighth and to know the â—ove of Christ which passes knowledge â—hat the remembrance of him may pierce â—e with grief transport me with love captivate my will engage all my affections to him and for him And let me knoâ— I am passed from death to life because love the Brethren Shed abroad thâ— love in my cold frozen heart and inflaâ—â— it with fervent affection to thee and thing While my love is burning towards thâ— self oh how can it chuse but be imparâ—â— to thy Friends who sincerely love theâ— and on whom thou hast set thy heart arâ—shed thy love thy spirit whereby the are made like unto thee They mâ—â— needs be lovely in my eyes to whoâ— Christ is pretious Oh let me not conâ—â— to this Love-feast with a bitter but chanâ—â— table spirit Purge out therefore tâ—â— old leven of malice which will sow the Ordinance to me Oh that our Fâ—ther in Heaven may look down upon 〈◊〉 children feasting together in mutual loâ—â— and delight in the remembrance of 〈◊〉 that love he hath shewn us and joyâ—â— expectation of what further he hath pâ—â—mised to us Let me not sit sad aâ— dejected Joy and Thanksgiving as if I liked 〈◊〉 the provision or though my self not welcom Maâ—â— this real magnificent solemn sumptuous Feast these Celestial Viands wherewith thou feedest thy people by thy gracious comfortable discoveries of thy self a spiritual banquet unto my soul a feast of fat things a feast of wine on the lees of fat things full of marrow of wine on the lees well refin'd Do not onely stand and knocks but open the door of my heart vouchsafe to come in and abide with me that there may be a chearful comfortable converse sup with me and let me sup with thee that I may be abundantly satisfied with the fatness of thy house feel and find abundance of soul-satisfaction reached out to me in the Ordinance and do thou make me drink of the River of thy pleasure quench my thirst after carnal and let me be fill'd with Divine pleasures ravishments and contentments flowing from the inexhaustible fountain of Divine plentie Let my soul be satisfied as with marrow and fatness and my mouth praise thee with joyful lips Let me come before thee with thanksgiving and praise thee with my whole heart Let there be Angels work at Angels food make me joyful in thy house of prayer By and for him let me offer the Sacrifice of Praise to God the fruit of my lips giving thanks unto his Name in the great Congregation and Praise thee among much People Thou art ready to give bread to the hungry to fill them with good things Spiritual Thirst and the water of life to him that is athirst Thou art not straitned in thy self but I am straitned in my own bowels the desire and the meat the necessity and relief are all from thee Oh thou that providest Food give also a stomach bid and make me welcom say eat oh Friend drink yea drink abundantly oh Beloved Oh create and stir up in me earnest longings and a Spiritual appetite that I may come to be made partaker of the good things thou hast prepared for me with enlarged affections and longing desires after answerable to my need of the Ordinance and Christ offered in it as full nourishment for my Soul under the forms of Bread and Wine and with strong expectations to receive him and his benefits with desire let me desire to eat this Passeover
passing by so many offences and requirinâ— no satisfaction from us for such insufferable wrongs but transferring the punishment from us unto his own Son whoâ— love also was so great that he woulâ— bear our iniquities that we might be saved Oh how could he chuse a moâ—â— â—â—liging way of Redeeming us that hath â—us displayed the severest Justice and â—ghest Mercy the greatest hatred of sin â—â—e greatest love to sinners since by those â—equalled and unvaluable sufferings to â—hich he delivered up for us that Son â—ho is so near unto him that he is one â—ith him at once manifesting both how â—uch he hated sin which he so heavily â—nished in the person he most loved â—â—d how much he loved sinners by giâ—â—ng up what he so loved for a ransom 〈◊〉 those that were guilty of what he so â—â—ted And oh the miracle the amazing â—odigic of this Love that Heaven â—ould so condescend to Earth and that â—an should be so united to God! that â—â—od should dwell in flesh and that this â—sh should be our food That the Son of â—od should love us better then his life and 〈◊〉 the meat of Worms of Sinners of Eneâ—es that he should make himself preâ—nt to our Faith and as if he would do â—â—re then die for us desires to live for â—â—er in us and to be united to us Was â—â—er kindness like unto this was ever â—â—ch a furnace of love burning in any â—east can any heart freeze over such a fire Oh! who can abide the heat of thâ— love who can dwell in such flames aâ—â— not be consumed who can abide in 〈◊〉 great sense of this love and abide in thâ— body what instances can parallel whâ— words can be expressive what apprâ—hensions can commemorate what râ—ptures can be sufficient for the admiratioâ— of this so infinite love Be thou swâ—â— lowed up O my Soul in this depth 〈◊〉 Divine love and hate to spend thy though any more upon other things that hast suâ—â— a Saviour to take them up Oh! I shake I tremble am altogether confounded 〈◊〉 the approach of so great guest The Minister coming towards him Lord I am not wâ—â— thy that thou shouldest come under 〈◊〉 roof or to eat the crums that fall froâ— my own much less thy Table Oh wâ—â— am I that I should dare with my orignally actually desiled hands to receiâ—â— those high those holy Mysteries thâ— thou desirest to to come unto me be eâ—tertained by me what findest thou 〈◊〉 me that so much delights and invites thâ— to me art thou ignorant of my mâ—â—vile beginning and original I am not â—heruhim Seraphim or of the number of â—hat Celestial Hierarchy but dust and shes polluted dust and ashes Lord â—â—adst thou rather be at another mans â—cuse with dishonour then at thy own â—ith honour or if thou hast no respect â—o thine own honour if thou castest under â—ot all praise and renown if thou takest â—nto thee every vile sinner yet hast thou â—o regard to thy Greatness and Majesty Thou knowest my poverty my need my â—mpurity this poor place is a far unâ—eet habitation for thee Whence is this 〈◊〉 me that my Maker my Redeemer â—hould come unto mee thus favour thus â—ignifie me that thou shouldest be so â—elow thy self as to look upon so low so â—ain so miserable a thing as Man such a â—ead Dog as I am Why have I found grace in thy sight that thou shouldest take knowledge of me seeing I am a stranger Lord what am I that thou shouldest remember me be mindful of me visit me â—ast thine eye set thine heart upon me â—ome to marry thy self with me Whence â—omes it that thou who art in Heaven â—mongst them that know so well how to â—ove and serve thee shouldest vouchsafe to descend to me who know little eâ—â—â— but how to offend thee Canst thou 〈◊〉 be content to be without me Did 〈◊〉 meer love draw thee from Heaven 〈◊〉 my sake and give thy self for me to 〈◊〉 deem me from my sins and dost thou sâ—â— give thy self to me to be the strength anâ— health of my Soul As if thou couldâ— never give thy self enough or be neâ—â—â— enough mine Oh how am I astonishâ—â— at this inconceivable love oh that I weâ— able to comprehend it Oh that I had 〈◊〉 thousand hearts to correspond with iâ— oh stay my gracious Lord for the â—â—mcasure of my love till thou hast maâ—â— me able to do nothing else but love theâ— But since thou art pleased to come anâ— offer thy self to me my soul thirsteth 〈◊〉 thee I humbly stretch out my hands uâ—to thee my longing gasping desires aâ— after thee I open my heart with aâ— humble thankfulness to receive thee nâ—ver to be separated from thee for ever 〈◊〉 adhere unto thee Oh enter in and stâ—â— with me satisfie my soul with thy selâ— say This day is Salvation come unto tâ— house Oh be not now offended at thâ— loathsom sights in a soul so sick and dieaâ—eâ— â—ased so full of filth of rottenness and â—orruption into which thou art entering Do not disdain me for those many Malaâ—ies but come and cure me The Bread SEE my soul thy Saviour in the Minister and the benefits that come by â—im in the Bread and Wine believing â—hose with himself are given thee by him â—â—s really as the Elements by his Embassaâ—our saying Take eat this is my Body which is broken for you by Faith reâ—eive apply appropriate me unto thy â—elf This Bread consecrated by me is â—he Sacrament of my Body offered as an Expiatory Sacrifice for you Hereby I â—mpute my righteousness impart my loâ—ing kindness make over and give unâ—o you my whole self God and Man as Mediator in my Blood and Merits Graâ—es and Spirit Virtue and Benefits Obeâ—ience Satisfaction Expiation Doings â—nd Sufferings in all I have am or have â—urchased for you I make yours by gift â—nd you by Faith as truly as if put into your very hand and mouth Mine were the pains the sufferings of Death yours the benefit mine the stripes yours the balm mine the thorns yours the Crown These are the holes in my hands and side the blood that issued from them yours the price mine yours the purchase See here in my wounds your safety in my stripes your healing in my anguish your peace in my Cross your Triumph I came out of my Fathers bosom that thou mightest lie in Abrahams Own me for thy Lord who have thus bought thee out of slavery accept me for thy Redeemer who have paid so dearly for thee follow me in the way I have shewen thee that I may bring thee to him I have reconciled to thee Do this in and for a remembrance of me who what for whom why for what end with what mind I suffered what I have done for yon and am unto you Dear Saviour biddest thou me Remember thee How should I forget thee how can I but remember but celebrate thee But oh that I could more affectionately
my former receiving when it left not earnest breathings for the like opportunity was it possible for me to meet with God to taste the sweetness the fulness of Christ to experience the reachings forth of my love and desires the pleasures of acting grace and not long for another meeting By thy grace I will therefore communicate with more devotion repent with greater contrition walk with more caution pray more earnestly receive with more reverence and I doubt not but I shall find my affections encrease together with the Spiritual benefit The frequent solemn exercise of our graces must needs dispose strongly to Habitual ones and hugely promote the Interest of Religion It cannot be that the Sacrament be undervalued by frequent repetitions without great unworthiness of the person setting light by and loathing spiritual Manna and an unworthy Communication for he that receives worthily encreases in the love of God and of Religion and the fires of the Altar are apt to kindle into a flame and when our Lord enters into us and we grow weary of him or less fond of his frequent entrance and perpetual cohabitation 't is an infallible sign we have or are ready to let in his Enemy no Secular object hath any pleasure in it long beyond the hope of it for the possession and enjoyment is found so empty that we grow weary of it but whatsoever is spiritual is less before we have it but in the fruition swells our desires enlarges the Appetite and makes us more receptive and forward in the Entertainment Nor is it likely they will suffer for who refuse to banquet with him They proclaim they have no portion in David no inheritance in the Son of God Oh he qualms of undesirous Communicants should justly stir up the faithful to loath it in themselves Habitual Preparation THe death of Christ in regard of his intent was a Sacrifice to God but of the Jews the greatest crueltie and murder When a prophane person comes he sheds the blood of Christ which a Believer receives and by Faith feeding on it being one with Christ makes as great satisfaction to God as if he had suffered to Eternitie This new wine must not be put into an old vessel else the wine will be spilt and the vessel perish Christ and Belial cannot cohabit he will not enter through a besmear'd door nor dwell in a nasty house Feet that walk in filthy paths are not to tread his holy place nor a heart full of rancour hatred uncharitableness to sit down at this feast of love Hands dipt in blood polluted with unlawful gains stain'd with spots of the flesh or stretched out to injure him in his members are most unfit to be reached forth to receive him in the Sacraments to handle those holy mysteries Those Teeth that grind the face of the poor to eat the bread of Angels the Mouth that 's full of rotten corrupt communication evil speaking reviling or that thirsts after the blood of our neighbour to drink the Blood of Christ Eyes gazing on vanity to look on Jesus Oh how pure ought I to keep those doors of my Soul at which the King of Glory so often enters Shall I kiss his hand with filthy lips put hallowed bread and wine into a noysom sink go to that Table as Swine to their trough in my pollution ravish contemn the grace and mercy of God tear them asunder from the conditions he hath annexed to them He will not be one with an Harlot nor seen with the same eyes His Body never saw Corruption nor will be mixed with it It lay in a Virgin Womb and Sepulchre and still resides only in Virgin Souls Devoted Consecrated set apart to his use and service His glorified body is no more capable of dishonour nor will enter into an earthly soul Unclean birds receive nothing but the Carcass of the Ordinance the Bread without the Body the Wine without the Blood both without the blessing the Elements but not the Sacraments such are guilty of his Body and Blood for reaching out their hand with purpose to receive him into a polluted soul though he withdraw himself that they cannot partake of him They disgrace their Prince by shewing it to his Statue erected for his honour and remembrance are guilty of Treason by offering Indignity to his Seal and Picture dishonour done to the Image and representation reflects upon the Original he is personally in Heaven and will be no where Sacramentally but in the Heavenly part of man he finds no rest in a heart full of vain vitious thoughts it stinks like the lake of Sodom he retires thence vexed with the unclean Conversation of the impure Inhabitants When he approaches to a soul and finds it a Cage of unclean Birds he flyes with the wings of a Dove to cleaner and whiter Habitations But if we avoid hate and have no fondness of affection for them and with complacency entertain the contrary then Christ hath washed our feet and then he invites us to his Supper The unavoidable infirmities of our lives against which we daily strive and for which we never have any kindness or affection are not spots in these feasts of Charitie but instruments of Humility and stronger invitations to come to Rites ordain'd for corroboratives gainst infirmities and for growth in the inner man But remanent affection to a sin enmitie with neighbours secular avocations to the height of care and trouble excuse not but increase mens sin and secure their misery 'T is just they graze with Goats that refuse to wash their hands that they may come to the Supper of the Lamb. The excuses wherewith they palliate their neglects of waiting upon our Lord and accepting his kindness all grow upon this bitter root of an unholy careless life loving the world and the lusts thereof the only reason is they have a mind to live as strangers to him and not to be his houshold servants and domesticks for then they might always come unto him They think they must not come so oft because to prepare themselves costs them so much time but would they spare so much as to lead a holy life and be at so much trouble as to please God in other things they would not find it so laborious to please him in this Kept they always a fear of God in their Souls they would without much pains be fit to approach with fear and reverence into his presence would they fear to do what God hath forbidden they would not fear to do what he hath commanded but while they refuse to obey him in one thing no wonder they do in another Religion concerns not our actions only but the frame and disposition of our hearts and minds and the same habitual graces are to be daily exercis'd though in a lower measure and degree Every day is to be holy to the Lord though every action in the day be not equally holy When we labour conscienciously to stand to our first Promise and
solemnly to search purifie cleanse and cast out all the leaven to pray with greater appetite praise his Name with a more delightful relish To distaste all oher things to disburthen my self to lay aside every weight and the sin that so easily besets me to get as near Heaven as possible to render my mind more sensible of God and more fit to receive a deeper impression from his hand To excite the strongest acts of Faith the vehementest flames of love and longings after Christ and his blessings which prepares for the enjoyment Holy desires joy and thankfulness at the approach of so blessed an opportunitie To renew my resolutions and vows of holy obedience to mortifie my lesser irregularities and to bind the obligations faster that are upon my Soul To have a lively sense of the ends for which I go in what estate my Graces stand what I am to ask and for what I ought to plead the Blood of Christ voluntarily to offer more of my time and thoughts to Religious Exercises and to do that over again with a greater fervour which I have been doing since the last Communion To recover my self to the same or rather higher degrees of Zeal fervour and sublime admirations to apparel trim and dress up my mind with braver notions and brighter ornaments To get my manners carriage and behaviour rightly formed and handsomely composed for this Feast with die great King He that understands the excellencie and holiness of the mystery the glorie of the Guest the infinite benefit then designed and the increase of degrees by the exercise of those previous acts of Holiness the manner so contrarie as worthy and unworthy the effect of the Ordinance so much depending on the manner of receiving the advantage so great of Communion with Christs Bodie the danger no less then Damnation that it will set one forward and contribute very much to an happie or an unhappie eternitie a man cannot at all be supposed in any state wherein this thing will be indifferent to him will not be inquisitive into the just measure but do it heartilie devoutlie reverentlie and as much as he can put himself in to a meet disposition tobe so familiar with God Solemn Sequestration A Journey an unfixed Heart undischarg'd of earthly thoughts travelling up and down afar off unfits as well as a dead body or gross sins Earthly thoughts in the Temple if not driven away before will be buzzing pestring vexing me and corrupt the Sacrifice If I go with a loose ungirt spirit I cannot instantly entertain my Lord his work must stay untill I be ready I must be girding when I should be working or do it fumblingly and awakedly not with dexterity and activity Let your loins therefore be girt and you your selves like men that wait for their Lord that when he comes and knocks you may open to him immediately It concerns me now to put my self into that order and state of good things as if to morrow I were to dye to suppose my self seated before Gods Tribunal and to see whether I can reasonably hope my state is changed my sins pardoned and mortified to consider that unless I dare dye that day if God should call me there 's little reason I should dare to receive the Sacrament of â—ife or Minister of death If I be mistaken about the truth of Grace now I am undone for ever without true Repentance by my unworthy going I bind the guilt of all my other sins upon my Soul and add this to all the rest guiltiness of the blood of Christ He that communicates worthily is justified from his sins and to him death can have no sting to whom the Sacrament brings life and health And if I judge Righteous Judgement I shall soon find what pinches most what makes me most afraid what most criminal and least mortified so shall learn to make provision accordingly Enter then my Soul into thy chamber solemnly sequester thy self from all other Avocations that we may tend upon the Lord without distraction Shut up set a watch at the gates of thy heart let it not be open till that solemn day be over If other thoughts be hankering and hanging about for entrance testifie against them rebuke and threaten them let thy spirit in a holy indignation rise up against them the only means that from that time forth they come no more in such a season Farewell my Wife and Children Friends and secular concerns abide you here at the foot of the Mount be husht and laid deadned and mortified all irregular earthly passions and affections I have something else to do you are a clog unto my soul tread not nor whisper in this solemn place where is no room but for God alone trouble me not the door is now shut I am about a great work I will not cannot open to you And Oh thou that lookest from Heaven that fashionest the hearts of men and considerest all their works enlighten enliven and convince me affect assist and prosper me own accept and bless me call in and restrain the loosness and wandrings of my thoughts Fix unite and fill my heart with an awe a dread and reverence of thee with suitable thoughts apprehensions and meditations to the present occasion and let my meditations be attended with sutable affections Let all flesh be silent before thee let thy spirit rest upon me let this season be improved not carelesly sloathfully or negligently but sincerely uprightly with my whole soul heart and strength to thy praise and my great advantage at thy Table and in the day when thou shalt judge the secrets of mens hearts by Jesus Christ Strict examination I Am about to sit at the Lords Table among his own Children I know before-hand the King attended with his glorious Angels will come in to see his guests Christ's garment covers only Christ's members he is too just to be bribed too great to be slighted too wise to be deceived too jealous to be provoked too good to be forfeited Oh what solemn provision shall I make for so sacred a presence but a serious diligent deep enquiry into with a full and awfull discussion of the particular present estate of my Soul whether I be such as may be assured he will bid me welcome being reconciled to him and endued with those vital qualifications which pre-dispose me for an Ordinance that supposes me within the Covenant it seals and to have spiritual life it sustains and nourishes by conveying that true food of life Christ Crucified I must be born before I can eat Vncircumcised persons were not to eat the Passeover The inward of Ordinances are only enjoyed by them that are inwardly Christians Those only that bring true Graces receive real Comforts we take Christ and then eat him none find any nourishment relish or sweetness in his blood but those who have receiv'd him and so have a propriety in a little to him and the nearer the Interest the greater sweetness He must be
Search my Soul so to the bottom that none of my wounds may fester but be all discovered and cured consider from whence I am fallen before and since the last Communion and repent and O that I may be so sensible of my sin and misery that I may be truly apprehensive of and thankful for infinite love and mercy I dare not presume to compass thine Altar most holy Lord before I have washed my hands in Innocency and purified my heart by Repentance and Faith in the blood of my Redeemer I will now therefore call my sins to remembrance and set them in order before mine eyes and remember mine own evil ways and my doings which have not been good and loath my self in my own sight for my iniquities and for my abominations O I am not able to reckon up or remember my innumerable breaches of thy most holy Commandments The 1. By not knowing acknowledging thinking remembring chusing believing esteeming adoring loving desiring fearing obeying of trusting joying in acquainting my self with not demeaning my self towards thee as God and my God but preferring sin self Satan the world any thing before thy self The 2. By mis-apprehensions gross conceits of thee not setting my whole delight in reposing all my confidence on expecting all my happiness from addressing all my complaints prayers praises unto thee not worshipping thee as to manner and means agreeable to thy word The 3. By not acknowledging or effectually remembring and delighting to speak of thee as I have had occasion to make thy praise glorious or doing it irreverently dealing falsly in my Covenant with thee not vindicating thy Honour not grieving for thy Dishonour weariness of thy commands non-observance distrust misapplication of thy providences unthankfulness for great mercies dejection impatience under small crosses insensibleness incorrigibleness under judgments and afflictions not using thy Name Attributes Ordinances Works every thing whereby thou may'st be known as is required The 4. By unmindfulness beforehand to prevent or avoid whatsoever might distract in the duties of the Sabbath not preparing my self not resting from needless thoughts words actions mis-spending it in idleness and vanity not performing publick and private duties of Prayer Reading Hearing Examination wheting thy Law upon my heart and others contemplating thy Word and Works with that care reverence sincerity spirtualness profit delight as I ought not calling the Sabbath a Delight Holy of the Lord Honorable The 5. By not behaving my self answerable to my several Relations with all due reverence and respect to my Natural Ecclesiastical Political Parents in heart word behaviour prayer thanksgiving for Superiours covering their infirmities in love not admonishing and encouraging Inferiours in well-doing not by a grave wise holy exemplary carriage procuring glory to thee and preserving the honour and authority thou hast put upon me not regarding the dignity and worth of my Equals or rejoycing in their gifts advancement prosperity as my own The 6. By sinful anger hatred secret grudges injurious thoughts excessive passions distracting cares immoderate use of diet labour rest recreation reviling saddening provoking grieving speeches falling short in maintaining mutual Friendship and in following peace with all men sowing discord among Brethren concealing their dangers unprofitable conversation quenching suppressing holy suggestions preferring things of time before eternity or by whatsoever may tend not to the health but prejudice of my own or others Soul or Bodies not weeping with them that weep being sensless hard-hearted unaffected at publick evils and others miseries The 7. By unchaste thoughts purposes affections looks company words actions or listening to them not labouring to quench my fleshly concupisence by watching over my senses heart and ways not shunning all occasions to or acts of uncleanness in or with my self or others not keeping my bodie and soul from all filthiness of flesh and spirit but making my heart a cage of impure thoughts my mind a stie of the unclean spirit The 8. By unbecoming arts in Bargaining not dealing with others as I would men should with me not endeavouring by all just means to procure preserve and further the welfare of others as well as my own withholding good from them to whom it was due suffering Christ to stand at and go away from my door hungry cold naked succourless and when the leanness of his cheeks pleaded pitie the hardness of my heart would shew no compassion The 9. By slandering backbiting detracting reviling harsh flattering misconstruing discouraging sinister intentions words and actions listening to and spreading the faults of others not charitable in my thoughts and speeches to them not freely acknowledging their gifts and graces not readily receiving a good report but willingly admitting an evil one not discouraging tale-bearers flatterers slanderers not loving desiring rejoycing in caring for defending and upholding their good name not sorrowing for and covering their infirmities but practising or not avoiding my self or not hindring what I can in others such things as raise jealousies and suspicions procure an ill name to my self or others The 10. By self-love evil thoughts covetousness inordinate prizing and affecting distrustful distracting solicitous care and study in getting keeping or using temporal things discontent with my own estate envying and grieving at my neighbours unlawful motions and affections to things that are his And to these I have added multitudes of sins against the Gospel by not as I ought labouring to acquaint my self with it Ignorance flighting of not sufficiently esteeming admiring thankful for that infinite love in my Redemption not loving rejoycing in Christ and him Crucified relying on owning of him in all his Offices accounting all things loss and dung for him not taking that pains I ought to know him and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of his sufferings and to be made conformable to his death if by any means I might attain unto the resurrection of the dead and be made perfect as my Father in Heaven is perfect Not claiming his promises as my heritage nor esteeming them the joy of my heart and as unsearchable riches exceeding great and precious not believing prizing embracing of hoping waiting for the good of them with so much readiness and steadfastness as their excelcellency and certainty requires and applying them as I ought to this and the next life not careful they have their due effects on my Soul in making me partaker of the divine nature not dying daily to sin nor acting growing in grace and in the knowledge of Christ not thirsting after righteousness and that poor mournful meek merciful pure Spirit that shall be blessed not confessing but being ashamed of Christ before men and my relation to him not denying my self taking up my Cross and following him Not doing all things to the glory of God nor rejoycing in him always Not receiving not doing the good nor improving time mercies judgments forein perturbations national discontents and divisions irreligious confusions domestick distinguishing favours as I ought Strangeness
break of day and wondred we were not trimming our Lamps not decking our selves knowâ—ng with whom we were to meet to feast â—o day Our Beloved spake and said â—nto us Rise up my Love my Fair Ones and come away This is the day which the Lord hath made we will reâ—oyce and be glad in it How should we welcom it with suffcient joy thankfulness for the approach of so great a Blessing â—hat brings our Saviour so near unto us 'T is too too late I will arise and get â—e ready but where are my Cloths Oh â—ow poor how empty how naked am I Oh for the fairest sweetest robe of â—houghts and wishes out of my Fathers Wardrobe Oh for my silken golden twist of Faith to hang the Jewel of Godâ— sorrow and Humility Love and thankfulness upon I am never drest till they be on Oh where are they I saw them by me but just before I went to bed what was I then so long about but gathering tying raising them up Ah this vain World this envious Devil this evil deceitful Heart hath been ravelling stealing them out or hid them from me that now I am as far to seek as ever Oh whither shall I what shall I do to find them behold the Bridegroom cometh and I am not ready I cannot dare not go to day Now will my Lord be angry when he comes in to see his guests he looking over them will say where 's such a one was he not bidden I 'm sure I invited him If I go undrest he 'l ask how came I in not having on a Wedding Garment to either I shall be speechless Ah foolish 〈◊〉 careless heart to let Earthly so intangle thy Heavenly Thoughts thou knowest not now how to unloose them which heed and care might have prevented my horrible negligence and guiltiness makes mâ—â—tremble to go yet not dare to keep away for where should my polluted Soul be washt but in that Fountain set open for sin and for uncleanness Oh thou that wilt in no wise cast off him that cometh unto thee dis-intangle my thoughts from all things below and dress me up as pleaseth thee over-look my manifold weaknesses and imperfections in my preparation if I knew nothing by my self yet were I not thereby justified I have no Righteousness of my own and if I had I would not mention it before thee though I were Righteous and had the greatest fitness and perfection a creature is capable of yet would I not answer thee I would not plead but supplicate not stand upon my Right but petition thy Favour not expect thy Justice but crave thy pity I would make supplication to my Judge The Righteousness of man is not pleadable before a Righteous God if thou shouldest be extream to mark what is done amiss by the best men in the best actions O Lord who could stand we are all as an unclean thing and all our righteousness are as filthy rags my person is loathsom and abominable my preparation and best performances carry in them matter of my own death and indictment except thou oh cover them with the Robe of Christ's Righteousness and sprinkle them with his blood they can find no acceptance with thee And Oh thou who for our sake tookest upon thee our passions and sensibilities our weaknesses and sufferings so art become a merciful High Priest and pitiful to our infirmities receive a wearied sinner an overbur-thened Conscience an afflicted polluted Soul into thy care custody and cure The humility and sorrow love and purity of any Creature is not sufficient to make me worthy to be fed with thy Body nourisht with thy Blood united to thee to dwell and be one with thee but what I cannot be of my self let me be made of thee who of God art made unto us Wisdom Righteousness Sanctification and Redemption Oh weigh thine own not my merits that I may offer up an odour of a sweet smell a sacrifice acceptable well pleasing unto thee by Christ Jesus the life of them that believe and the Resurrection of the dead From him I hope for victory against my sins strength in Duty against my weakness succour in my life against temptation in my death against despair after death against damnation I presume upon thy help not because I â—ave deserv'd it for I have been an unprofitable servant but because thou hast redeemed me for thy Blood cannot be unprofitable Help me if not for my misery which I have deserved yet for thy mercies which thou hast promised for thy goodness is more ready to forgive then thy power to punish and thy Blood cries â—ouder for pardon then my sins for punishment Thou hast not yet forgiven so much as thou hast promised nor promis'd more than thou hast puchas'd Hath thy Blood satisfied for more sins than I can commit and shall it not satisfie for those 〈◊〉 have forsaken and do detest Hast thou purchased Mercy for more then repent and wilt thou not shew it on those to whom thou hast given Repentance Hast thou been so long calling that thou shouldest at last reject me so long promising Salvation that thou shouldst at last deny me I am thy Debtor for thy purchase but thou art mine for the promise 〈◊〉 could not oblige thee by my desert but thou hast obliged thy self by thy word I plead not the merit of my obedience but the mercy of the Covenant which thy Lâ—â—â— and mercy moved thee to make and thy Truth ties thee to perform Free grace made thee a promiser and thy promise hath made thee a Debtor Thou art not more Free in making promises then faithful in making them good a God that keepeth Covenant unto a thousand generations And oh that I could now laâ—â— aside my Body with my Business put off this outward man forâ— more naked The Soul Fixed inward spiritual sight that my mind might be rendred more sensible of him fit to receive 〈◊〉 deeper impression from his hand that nothing but him might enter in Away be gone ye wandring worldly vaiâ— thoughts for I am going to my God stiâ— not up nor disturb the Beloved of my Soul come not near I charge you make no noise to displease him or to call mâ— away from entertaining and enjoying oâ— him yea Lord bid them be gone and not dare to appear before thee It is the voice of my Beloved I hear him inviting me to his Table I see him coming to entertain me let all flesh therefore be silent and not be so bold as to whisper in his presence Welcom holy thoughts and pure desires Oh happy time wherein I may embrace my Saviour and solace my soul in the armes of my dearest Love Awake my Understanding Will and Affections awake my Glory and my Heart awake all ye Powers Faculties and Graces of my Soul and all that is within me be summon'd in stirred up and wholly bent to attend this service My costliest Box of Oyntment cannot be bestow'd better then on my
more constantly more effectually remember thee With all the passionate affections of a Heart full of love to wholly in love with thee with all zealous desires to glorifie thee with all fervent longings after thee always to remember thee never to forget thee Oh that the fire of love would now kindle and burn in my Soul boil up even run over with love unto thee Oh that I had the flames of a Seraphim the voice of an Angel to sing thy praise Oh that I could go out of my self when I remember thee and never think of thee without an Extasie forget and quit all the world to live upon thee The thoughts of what thou hast done is able to break an heart of Marble with love to turn a Rock into a Fountain of tears to unloose the tongue of the dumb that they may sound forth thy loving kindness Oh after all his foregoing sufferings feest thou him not my Soul fastened to the Cross conflicting with his Fathers wrath groaning under the weight and burthen of our Sins Look how his whole Body is stretched and tentered his Hands and Feet bored through his precious Blood trickles down and how miserably the Thorns pierce his holy Head See how his Looks are changed his Cheeks pale his Bloud going his Neck too weak to support his Head which lies a dying on his bleeding Breast Look how he shakes and stirs his dying Limbs what gasps and sighs he fetches as if his Soul was strugling to get out Hear you not his dying groans the taunts of the Jews yea the groans of the Earth under the weight of his Cross See the Sun blushing under a veil of darkness to behold the Son of Righteousness under an Eclipse Can oh can my bosom hold now I see the innocent Lamb of God that taketh away the sins of the world a bleeding Victim on the purple Alter of Death This this my Soul might have been the day that thou mightest have been the Malefactor and have drunk the cup of the fierceness of Gods wrath but there is he that hath done it for thee He harboured no grief of his own but is acquainted with the just and deadly griefs of others he takes our sorrows on him to bestow upon us his joy he sorrows for us that hath neither cause nor likelihood to sorrow for himself What but Gods implacable vengeance could inflict What but his all-sufficient patience could endure What but mans heinous sins deserve such his sad and wrathfull dolors Ah sinful wretches 't is our doings that he suffers our evil but his smart our trespass his punishment His breast is made a large receptable for our cares his back a common prop unto our load he was delivered for our offences he was slain but not for himself he bore our grief and carried our sorrows he was wounded for our trangressions bruised for our iniquities for the transgressions of his people was he smitten Why then are we angry with rail against the Jews and complain not of find no fault with our selves greatlier guilty they were the instruments we the procurers of his sufferings their sins practis'd ours provoked his death we pity his abus'd innocency but think not of our unworthiness and desert bewail the event and redress not the cause we have as great enmity against his Image as they against his Person they grieved him in his Body we in his Spirit and make his wounds bleed afresh he takes it as heinously we should despise him now as that they persecuted him then they were but our Executioners to inflict these punishments our sins deserved and Gods justice imposed on him 'T was thy Sins O my Soul were the associates to crucifie him thy hypocrisie was the kiss that betrayed him thy pride and covetousness the Thorns that crowned him thy oppression and cruelty the nails that pierced him thy unbelief and apostacy the spear that gored him thy Idolatry superstition Juke warmness the knee that mockt him thy contempt of Religion the spittle that defiled him thy anger and bitterness the vinegar and gall that distasted him thy scarlet sins the crimson that dishonoured him my drinking iniquity like water made him drink a Cup of wrath my forsaking my Father made him forsaken of his all the members of his body were objects of such cruelty because mine instruments of iniquity Oh I am the merit of thy sorrow I am the stroke of thy grief I am the fault of thy killing I am the desert of thy death I am the offence of thy revenge I am the grievousness of thy passion I am the cause of thy torment Oh wonderful condition of censure Oh ineffable disposition of the misery the unjust sins and the just is punished the guilty transgresses and the guiltless is stricken the impious offends and the pious condemn'd what the bad deserves the good suffers what the servant perpetrates the Lord pays what man commits God undergoes Whither oh Son of God whither descends thy Humility Whither flameth thy Charity whither proceedeth thy Pity whither encreaseth thy Benignity whither reacheth thy Love whither cometh thy Compassâ—on I have been proud thou hast been humbled I have done unjustly thou art punished I have dealt heinously thou art revengefully smitten I have committed the fault thou art tortured How much do I owe thee most Blessed Redeemer how great is the price thou hast paid for me miserable Sinner Oh I blush to see my Soul so foul and loathsom that nothing less then thy precious blood serves to wash and cleanse it I am confounded to see thee in such a case for us who cared not how vile how base how miserable we were Oh how was that justice injured that could not rest appeased in Punishment but rigour how odious and intolerable is every sin which required no cheaper blood for a Sacrifice then that of the Son of God and which not suffering only but extremity must expiate how heinous was the commission since even the remission was so grievous That made such a breach between God and us as requir'd such sufferings of the Lord of Glory wretch that I am to cost my God so dear I am not worthy for which he should have suffered the least care or trouble much less the torments of Soul and Body And yet what mean I to be so treacherous unto him How have I broken his commands and my vows even since the last Communion Oh can I Kiss the nails hug the spear desire that which is the blood of him that lost his life Can I account that light which made his Soul heavy unto death Can that be my joy which made him a wan of sorrow sweet to me which was so bitter to him shall those sins not be forsaken by me that made him forsaken of God or live in me that would not suffer him to live in the world Oh can I endure my Lord should be evermore disgusted and affronted oh how is my heart provoked and incens'd against ye my
of his Cross by â—im to reconcile all things to himself we â—â—at were sometimes Aliens and Enemies â—ow thou hast reconril'd in the body of his â—â—esh through death to present us holy unâ—â—lameable unreproveable in thy sight â—e who sometimes were far off are made â—igh by the blood of Christ for he is our â—eace our peace-maker who hath made â—oth one broken down the middle wall â—f partition betwen us by whom we have â—â—so now received the Attonement Lord I am in worse than Egyptian â—ondage a captive to Satan a slave 〈◊〉 my Lusts destitute of grace and eveâ—â— good thing But is not here a sufâ—cient price laid down for my ransom â—nd all things pertaining to life and godliâ—ess hath he not obtained eternal reâ—emption for us who came to give who â—â—ve himself a ransom for many for all Hath he not delivered redeemed bought me quite out of the hands-of Justice out of the power of Sin and Satan If while we were yet sinners Christ died for us much more then being now justified by hiâ— Blood shall we be saved from wratâ— through him For Sin he condemned siâ— in the flesh overcame death and destroyed him that had the power of death eveâ— the Devil I beg of thee and rely upon theâ—â—for supplies of my soul-pressing wants grace and peace comfort more love untâ— thee and fear of thee and. I ask no morâ— then what he hath bought for me who hatâ— not onely purchased me with his owâ— blood but all good things by the redundancy of his Merit after satisfactioâ— made unto thee for our debt I have no righteousness of my own but what is as filthy rags but thou haâ— made him to be sin for us who knew 〈◊〉 sin that we might be made the righteousness of God in him we are clothed witâ— him and appear in thy sight as parts anâ— portions of himself the fulness of him thâ—â— filleth all in all Oh! impute not thâ— guilt but the merit of his blood unto mâ—â— behold me in him whom thou hast appointed between thee and sinners whose righteousness in every point answers thy Justice and whose sufferings are sufficient to satisfie the penalty of all my sins Oh ballance them against mine iniquities and the excess and proportion of virtue in his obedience against the malignity and unpleasingness of my disobedience they will so far exceed in weight and worth that thou wilt in justice rather pour forth thy mercy upon me and accept me into favour for the one then hold me still in displeasure for the other And oh thou who without grudging bore my burthen when thou stoodst at the Bar of Accusation when thou shalt sit in the seat of Judgment wilt thou stick to seal my pardon Where thy self hath paid the debt thy justice cannot deny to sign the Acquittance nor thy tender love suffer thee to condemn or reject a member of thy body a part of thy self Thou that sufferedst for me here and pleadest for me now cannot forget to be gracious to me then The Law Satan and my sins no only stop my mouth that I cannot plead my own Cause but they plead against me and cry unto thee for vengeance Buâ— is not this Blood as a visible prayer iâ— every wound as so many mouths opeâ— interceding to thee for pardon and mercy for me saying behold the travel 〈◊〉 my Soul the purchase of my blood thâ— fruit of my Agonies for him I wepâ— and sweat bled and dyed he hath sinned but I have satisfied he departeâ— for a season that thou shouldest receive him for ever not as a servant only buâ— brother unto me both in the flesh and in the Lord for mine and thy own sake therefore if thou account me thy beloved Son receive him as my self in whom thou art well-pleased if he have wronged thee or owes thee ought put it on my account I will repay it I will answer for him I Jesus have ratified and confirmed it with my own Blood his surety came not out of Prison untill he had paid the uttermost farthing Behold Oh Lord the bleeding wounds of thy own Son remember how his body was broken think upon his precious blood shed for us let us dye if he hath not made a full satisfaction we desire not to be pardoned if he hath not paid our debt But canst thou behold him and not be well-pleased with us canst thou look upon his body and blood which we present to thee and turn thy face from us Oh let us prevail in the vertue of his Sacrifice for the Graces and Blessings we need Take pity have mercy upon us for his sake whom we now desire to hold up between thy anger and our Souls and hide not thy self from us unless thou canst from him whom we bring with us unto thee While we are remembring him at his Table he is remembring us at his Father's right hand I am not only guilty but polluted sin hath as well defiled as it would damn me But oh remember who loved us and washed us from our sins in his own blood of virtue and Spirit to purifie me as value and merit to pacifie thee To this Fountain which thou hast set open I bring my polluted Soul and what hinders but that I may wash and be clean be purged from the filth as well as pardon'd for and saved from the guilt of all my sins for the Blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sins Oh how often is my Soul cast down within me my omissions and Commissions my sins and duties as I perform them discomfort me I am ashamed of and blush to see them my petitions for pardon stand in need of pardon my tears of washing my best performances are provocations and help to fill up the measure of my sins but for the Priest that offers the Altar that sanctifies all my services the sweet incense he offers with our prayers His Priesthood is for ever available and effectual for us Here is wine sweetned with the love of God perfumed with the divine nature that chears the heart of God by way of satisfaction and the heart of Man by way of pacification that makes peace in Heaven and within us and all our Sacrifices wellpleasing unto thee who dealst not with us according to our frailties but state in our Advocate who when he had by himself purged our sins sate down on the Right hand of the Majesty on high and ever lives to make intercession for us If thy grace prevented us before Repentance that we might return shall it not much more prevent Repenting sinners that we may not perish how canst thou but love them that love thee seeing thou loved us when we hated thee Oh my stony unrelenting heart how unaffected am I with my own vileness and thy goodness the evil of sin and excellency of grace the worth of my Soul and death of my Saviour but the blood of Christ is able to soften and
mollifie the most obdurate sinner Oh that I could feel the vertue and power of it dissolving this rock into a fountain of tears a relenting frame a heart of flesh My lusts and Corruptions are many and mighty too strong for me but not for thy self As in the first Adam's sin man died legally so in the second Adam's death sin died virtually He suffered to save his people from their sins that himself and not sin should have dominion over us Shall not that blood mortifie my pride worldliness inordinate affections which shall subdue the whole body of sin shall I reproach or make void his death unto my own Soul or by continuance in sin that brought so great a punishment on so great a person be a greater enemy to him then the Jews were How shall we that are dead to sin live any longer therein knowing this that our Old man is crucified with him that the body of sin might be destroyed that henceforth we should not serve sin Oh that I may henceforth find and reckon my self to be dead unto sin but alive unto God through Jesus Christ our Lord Oh how am I tempted and assaulted that I am sometimes ready to say I shall one day fall by my spiritual enemies but Faith gives us a share in the victories of Christ having spoyled all Principalities and Powers he made a shew of them openly triumphing over them as our enemies in on the Cross his triumphant Chariot took away from them all possibility to hurt though they assault us still we are assured of an absolute victory The accuser of the Brethren is cast down which accused them before God day and night and they overcome by the Blood of the Lamb that hath quenched the flames of divine fury and all our enemies are reconciled or subdued Ah my Lord how often doth sin and the world deadden my heart and affections towards thee O how dull how indisposed that I cannot pray with life nor be lively in thy service but this blood was shed to set Prisoners free and is the life of all our duties graces and comforts Oh that its power and efficacy may quicken and enliven me may put vivacity and activity in me that I may pray and hear receive meditate and discourse of spiritual things with freedom and liberty liveliness and chearfulness Oh that I may no more as I have too too often disbelieve or question the promises of this life or that to come For this Blood ratifies and confirms the Covenant of grace not only purchased but assures us of all good things Christ's Will and Testament wherein he hath bequeathed such precious legacies to his people is now of force for a Testament is of force after the Testator is dead Oh how ought it to affect me for the betraying of innocent Blood he was holy harmless undefiled separate from sinners in his hands no wickedness in his heart no sin no guile found in his mouth I and my brethren are guilty but for this spotless Lamb what hath he done and where there is no sin thou inflictest no punishment But he was numbred with the Transgressors surely then the Lord hath laid on him the iniquity of us all for the transgression of my people was he smitten by his knowledge shall my righteous servant justifie many for he shall bear their iniquities Oh! I take thee at thy word and do believe all my sins with all thine Elects were imputed to our surety and the wages of sin inflicted on him that we might be fully acquitted and discharged I am guilty of many aggravated sins and am the greatest of sinners but with thee is plenteous redemption through Christ Jesus who shed his Blood not because we were Righteous but to make us So of infinite vertue and merit as sufficient for me as if none else were justified or saved by it He is able to save to the utmost all that come unto thee by him Oh how small how imperfect are my Graces how cold my Love how weak my Faith How faint my desires after thee but the least degree of Grace is the fruit of this Blood Oh that I may find it's efficacy perfecting that good work thou hast begun in me from strengh to strength till grace be consummated â—n Glory Through the Blood of the Eternal Covenant make me perfect in every good work to do thy will working in me that which is well-pleasing in thy sight Oh what trifles disturb my charitable affections how interrupted and inconstant my love to those who by one spirit are all baptized into one body but Christ hath reconciled us in one body by the Cross having slain the enmity thereby Oh that henceforth I may be of one heart with his Disciples and love them as he hath loved us Our God is a Consuming Fire which I cannot but dread having so much fuel about me and within me but in thy Son I see flesh of my flesh and bone of my bone who gave himself for us And shall the sentence of thy judgment disannul the merit of his sufferings of his satisfaction Didst thou not punish him that thou mightest spare us is it not as great a necessity of thy Satisfied Justice to spare the sinner as it was of thy offended Justice to punish the sin Thou art not only reconcilable but desirous to become our friend Oh how comfortable are those words of thine to my guilty Soul the Father judgeth no man but hath committed all judgement to the Son his first coming was in the flesh when he took on him our nature his second in the spirit when he imparted unto us of his spirit his third will be in power when he shall communicate to us his glory his first was to redeem his second to comfort his third will be to reward us If we be careful not to offend he will not be extreme to mark what we do amiss He will proceed not according to the Law which requires an absolute obedience without sin and will condemn all that have been guilty of any sin but according to the Gospel which admits of repentance for the forgiveness of sin and will condemn none but the unbelieving and impenitent sinner Damnation is denounced not for breaking the Law but rejecting the Gospel He is faithful because he hath promised and just because his Son hath purchas'd forgiveness The same sentence shall be pronounced as is past already in the Gospel Whosoever be-believes in him shall not perish but have ever-everlasting life Sin hath shut us out of paradise but â—e blood of Christ hath opened the Kingâ—om of Heaven to all believers It gives us â—ere a right and hereafter an admission â—â—rough this Red Sea we enter into the â—eavenly Canaan and for this cause he 〈◊〉 the Mediator of the New Testament â—hat by means of death for the redemption of the transgressions that were under â—he first Testament they which are called might receive the promise of eternal inheritance And he that
him who hath saved us and called us with an Holy Calling quickened us who were dead in trespasses and sins opened our Eyes bowed our Wills spiritualiz'd our Affections changed us from darkness to light and from the power of Satan unto God that we might receive forgiveness of sins and an inheritance among them that are sanctified by Faith in Jesus Christ To him who forgives our iniquities covers our sins justifies the ungodly healeth all our diseases imputeth not our trespasses but his Righteousness unto us redeemeth our life from death and destruction crowneth us with loving-kindness and tender mercies To him who hath adopted us and looks upon us and provides for us and deals with us as Sons Heirs of God and Coheirs with Christ Fellow Citizens with the Saints and of the houshold of God To him who hath not lately begun or will suddenly cease is neither inconstant or mutable in his Affections but from everlasting continues and will to eternity persevere immutable in his intentions to do us good that hath delivered doth deliver and will deliver and never leave us nor forsake us To him whom no ingratitude undutifull carriage or disobedience of ours could one minute wholly remove or divert from his steady purpose of caring for us who regards us though we do not attend to him procures our welfare though we neglect his concerns imploys his restless thoughts extends his watchful eye exerts his powerfull arm is always mindfull and busie to do us good watches over us when we sleep remembers us when we forget our selves in whom t is infinite condescension to think of us placed so far beneath his thoughts to value us dust and dirt and inconsiderable nothings not to despise and hate us so really despicable and unworthy To him that is as merciful and gracious as liberal and munificent that not only bestows on us more gifts but pardons us more debts then we live minutes that with infinite patience endures not only our manifold infirmities imperfections but our petulant follies and obstinate perverseness careless neglects wilful miscarriages trecherous infidelities who puts up the exceeding many outrageous affronts injuries and contumelies continually offered to his supreme Majesty by us base worms whom he hath always under his feet and can crush to nothing at his pleasure To him that hath loved us and washed us from our sins in his own blood and hath made us Kings and Priests unto God his Father a note the Angels cannot sing who have many strains of praise we are unacquainted with To him that is able to keep us from falling and to present us faultless before the presence of his Glory with exceeding great joy To him that vouchsafes us hearts and abilities to wait upon free access unto a constant intercourse and familiar acquaintance with himself to esteem and style us his friends and children to invite us frequently and entertain us so kindly with these incomparable delightful delicacies of spiritual repast with an affection as great as our fare is costly yea to invite us often at our home and if we admit to abide and dwell with us indulging us the enjoyment of that presence wherein the life of all joy and happiness consists and to behold the light of his all-chearing countenance To him who giveth freely and upbraideth no man with former unkindnesses and neglects of his love we are heartily ashamed of who calls us neither very frequently nor over strictly to account who exacts of us no impossibity no difficult burthen or costly return being satisfied with the chearful acceptance of his favours the hearty acknowledgments of his goodness the sincere performance of such duties to which our own welfare comfort advantage rightly apprehended would otherwise abundantly dispose us To him whose Benefits to acknowâ—edge is the greatest Benefit of all to be â—nabled to thank him who deserves our â—â—eatest thanks to be sensible of whose â—eneficence to meditate on whose goodâ—ess to admire whose excellencies to â—elebrate whose praise is Heaven it self â—he life of Angels the quintessence of Joy â—he supreme pitch of Beatitude To him â—hose benefits are immensely great innuâ—â—â—â—ably many inexpressibly good and â—â—recious be Glory Majesty and Dominion â—â—w and for ever And oh thou the blessed Fountain of all â—ercy and goodness Inspire our hearts â—ith thy Heavenly Grace and thereby inâ—ble us rightly to apprehend diligently to â—onsider faithfully to remmeber worthily 〈◊〉 esteem to be thankfully affected with 〈◊〉 render all due acknowledgment praise â—â—ve and thankful obedience for this and 〈◊〉 thy great and manifold favours and â—â—nefits confer'd upon us And blessed 〈◊〉 the Lord God of Israel from everlastâ—â—g to everlasting and blessed be his Gloâ—â—ous name for ever and let the whole â—arth be filled with his Glory and let all 〈◊〉 People say Amen Going Home O How great a Lord hath my Soul entertain'd How glorious a guest doâ—â— thou now harbour How pleasant a Companion how faithful a Friend hast thoâ— now taken in How dear a Husband doâ—â— thou now enjoy Oh the inestimable benefits receiv'd in these high and holy Misteries what am I O Lord or what is iâ— me that thou shouldest do this great honour and Glory unto me and reveal 〈◊〉 thy heart and love which is secret unto others he might have prepared torment but behold priviledges for me I am unworthy to touch the threshold of thâ— house and thou hast taken me to thâ— Table not worthy to stand among thâ— servants and thou hast made me sit witâ— my Saviour not worthy to fall dowâ— before thy foot-stool and thou hast smilâ— upon come in to me and made my heaâ—â— thy Throne while others eat the breaâ— of violence and drink the wine of deceiâ— what am I that I should eat the body anâ— drink the blood of thy own Son I aâ— not worthy to eat the bread of men anâ— thou hast given me the bread of Angels What they admire I have receiv'd whom they adore I have entertain'd their mirror is my meat Christ and they are two I and my Saviour are one oh unspeakable mystery oh incomparable mercy This is he who came from Edom with dyed garments from Bozrah whom we have seen glorious in his apparel travelling in the greatness of his strength returning in triumph from the slaughter and conquest of all his and our enemies mighty to save us from our sins that were mighty to condemn And he hath on his vesture the title is conspicuous and on his thigh the place of strength King of Kings and Lord of Lords Wherefore art thou red in thy apparel and thy garments like him that treadeth the wine fat I have trodden the winepress of the fierceness and wrath of God and of the people there was none with me I have discomfited my peoples enemies and trodden them down like grapes in a wine-press their blood is sprinkled upon my garments and I have stain'd all my garments Oh I beheld his blood streaming down through the
wedding Garment stain it by any pollution or seek after other lovers eat his Bread and lift up the heel against him take the Cup and betray my interest in him after I have receiv'd him cast him out of my heart live in that for which he died As the Sacrament is a memorial of Christ Crucifyed for sin let it be a remembrance to me of abhorring crucifying abstaining from it Else I hold on Satan's side seek to keep him on his throne do those things which Christ is more unwilling I should then he was to suffer all the indignities and torments the Jews inflicted he was willing to dye by their hands rather then any inconveniency should fall upon me then sin and Satan should reign over and keep possession in me he was not troubled so much to dye as he was to see me live in sin for he dyed that I might cease from sin And do I dispute when a temptation is presented whether Christ or Barrabbas shall be preferred my lusts denyed or my Lord Crucifyed that which would murther my Soul deserve to be spared or he that suffered to save it Oh how sad that he who seems to deifie Christ in the Eucharist should vilifie him in his members that such who pretend to eat and drink Christ's Body and Blood at the Church should eat the bread of wickedness and drink the wine of violence in their own houses that they should be so devout at the Sacrament as if they believed God to be in the Bread and in their lives so prophane as if they believed not God to be in Heaven Abandon and Crucifie all sin more then ever I have put off my coate of corruption how shall I put it on I have washed my feet in the blood of the Lamb how shall I defile them the Lord hath spoken peace unto me let me not return again to folly Hath he taken off my former burthen and cast it on the back of his dear Son and shall I lay more load upon him hath he loved me and washed me from my sins in his own blood and shall I with the dog return to the vomit with the sow that is washed to her wallowing in mire shall I take poyson after Physick make the Table of the Lord contemptible Hath he been so gracious to me as to vouchsafe and seal me a pardon of all my sins and shall I so abuse his goodness so turn his grace into wantonness as to run afresh on his score is not this to account the blood of the Covenant wherewith I am sanctified an unholy thing may I not fear his anger will kindle against me and that he will no more have mercy on me Oh let not those hands that were reach'd forth to receive Christ be stretched out to oppression and violence but be hence forth sacred and do no deed that may offend thee nor those lips that have touched those holy Mysteries be defiled with the Devils drivel filthy communication but be hallow'd from all words that may displease thee Oh let my Soul which by thy Sacrament is made so happy as to be so near to be never so wretched as to think any thing too dear for such a Saviour Let nothing make me leave my first love who for love of me left his Father and country Heaven and glory to espouse me Frequently consider the engagement thou hast hereby laid upon thy self No space of time can wear it off to the same strictness all our days as this though we had but this one opportunity to receive The Bonds my Soul is entered into will never be cancell'd God forgets not his promises nor my breaches though I may the matter is now out of my hands I cannot revoke this gift of my self to God indeed I have given nothing but what was his own before after these vows there is no enquiry to be made whether they should be kept This day I have avouched the Lord to be my God to walk in his ways and to keep his statutes and he hath avouched me to be one of his people I have taken Christ for my Lord and Husband to live in love and obedience to him as I hope to be saved by him Tempt me not therefore from my loyalty and allegeance the vows of God are upon me seald at the Sacrament and recorded in Heaven not one of my Fellow Communicants but are witnesses with and to God that they saw me personally publickly own and renew my Covenant with him for my Oath sake and those that sat with me I will not do this evill and sin against God Shall I alienate and pollute the heart so solemnly devoted to him break those bands asunder and fetch the Sacrifice away from the Altar tyed with such strong cords of Oaths and Covenants must I not expect to bring fire along with it to provoke God to a severe revenge of the mocks and scorns I put upon him shall I so horribly prophane his name and make my self such a forsworn perjur'd wretch Is it a light thing to break an Oath made solemnly with God shall he escape that doth such things or shall he break the Covenant and be delivered As I live saith the Lord surely my Oath which he hath despised and my Covenant which he hath broken even it I will recompense on his own head I am sure he will be true to his promises and shall I fall under his threatnings by being false to mine If a good man keep his Oaths and promises with men to his own hurt much more ought be those to God for his own good Walk on in the strength of this spiritual Food till thou comest to perfection Oh that I may still drink of the Spiritual Rock find the efficacy vertue and benefit of the Sacrament follow and stream after me while I travel in this Wilderness O that I may be stronger and stronger in all Graces more active and exacter in all Spiritual Duties hear more heedfully pray more fervently receive more believingly keep the Sabbath more exactly watch over my heart and ways more diligently be more humble and pious towards God more just and righteous to man more sober and temperate towards my self that I may walk worthy of Christ of the Covenant of the Sacrament Kingdom Gospel and Grace of God of my Birth and Breeding oh that my present deportment may be answerable to my future preferment that there may be some proportion between my frequent receiving and growing in Grace that I may shew forth his death till he come in respect of its influence on my Soul Delight in Spiritual fellowship with Christ's Members Oh that I may now bury all envy malice hatred uncharitableness and as Christ love my enemies but especially those that are partakers of the same benefits with me O that that sentence may still run in my mind If God so loved us we ought also to love one another Oh that I may shake off all ungodly society have my heart linked
my Duty walked unanswerable to those multiplied obligations laid upon me broken all thy holy Commandments by many and great transgressions made and judged my self unworthy of everlasting life * Here mention your particular failings so that nothing might remain unto me but a fearful looking for of judgment and fiery indignation to devour me But thou delightest in mercy and not in the death of a sinner art not willing any should perish but that all should come to repentance Oh take not counsel of thy just indignation but of thy native goodness thy satisfi'd justice Wilt thou destroy him that presents himself to be punished and thy Son to have satisfied that desires not to live unless it be by the benefit of thy mercy and his sufferings Wilt thou not spare me for thy Son who sparedst not thy Son for me Is there not enough in his Merits and Sacrifice to expiate all my sins and to justifie my person in thy sight O suffer not thy self to be deprived of the glory of my forgiveness and salvation as well as of my creation and redemption Save me whom thou hast hitherto spared and forgive me eternal death which I have so often merited by my great offences Bury them all in the bottomless Ocean of thy own Mercy and forgetfulness and my Saviours Blood lay them upon him who is able to bear them and cloath me with his righteousness that is able to cover me Oh free me from the guilt and stain the power and penalty the reign and dominion of sin that nothing may separate me from thy love nor from the sensible discoveries of it at thy Table That I may be a meet and worthy Receiver accept me into thy favour let thy mercy pardon my sins thy grace sanctifie my soul thy goodness supply my wants thy merits inrich my poverty thy precious blood wash away all my spots thy Holy Spirit prepare and direct and assist me Take away my filthy garments my spiritual filthiness and cloath me with the best robe the Lord our righteousness Oh think me worthy for his sake and make me worthy for thy mercy-sake Deal not with me according to my deserts but thy great goodness and my great necessity Let me so remember my sins that thou mayest forget them set them so before my face that thou mayest cast them behind thy back Give me such a lively steadfast Faith in Christ for forgiveness that thou mayest seal it up unto my soul Let me love him and all his members with a pure heart fervently at thy holy Communion and ever after without dissimulation So enlarge my Soul with spiritual affections and desires that it may even break for the longings it hath unto that Ordinance and unto thy Testimonies at all times Remove far from me all blindness of mind hardness of heart unrelenting affections deadness and indisposedness earthliness and distraction irreverence unbecoming apprehensions whatsoever may hinder the blessing and efficacy of that soul-nourishing refreshing Ordinance thy gracious presence my eternal salvation Create in me an understanding heavenly clean heart O God and renew an humble contrite right spirit within me prepared for thee Oh be not as a stranger unto me hide not thy self from me lift up the light of thy countenance upon me Let me feel the comfortable breathings of thy Holie Spirit in my Soul at thy Ordinance sanctifie it to me and me to receive it acceptably with due preparation and apprehensions reverence and humility repentance and faith love and charity joy and thankfulness a deep sense of thy inexpressible love and my own unworthiness And oh that all of us who this day approach thy Table may so eat his flesh which he hath given for the life of the World that we may live for ever and so drink his blood that it may be to us for remission of sins Meet us not in our selves in thy justice as a consuming fire but a reconciled Father in thy righteous and beloved Son whom thou gavest who gave himself for us when we were thy enemies Let us depart thence more under the power of thy love and grace and under greater resolutions and abilities to do thee faithful service all our dayes through Jesus Christ our Sacrifice and Redemption Hope and Confidence Surety and Advocate the Food and Health the Life and Salvation of our Souls who hath taught us when we pray to say Our Father c. As soon as ever the Sermon is ended look towards the Lords Table and say within your selves THis Sacrament I am going to is a standing Memorial of my Saviour's Passion wherein he once offered up Himself to God and a Sign of that nourishing and strengthning Grace which he now offers to me under the notion of Food It is the true meanes and instrument of conveying on me those Blessings and signifies that which by its proper Institution it represents In the making and ordering of those Elements see consider O my Soul the heavy Blows and Bruises the Pressures Piercings Pains and Sufferings of thy Saviour from his Father and wicked men The malice and violence of his Murderers crucified Him as a Malefactor and the fierie wrath of God made him a Burnt Sacrifice and under both these Sufferings He is become to me Meat indeed and Drink indeed the stay and support the comfort refreshment and life of my Soul nourishing and preserving it to eternal life That Bread and Wine could never sustain and nourish me if the one had not fallen into the Earth under the Sickle the Flail the Mill-stone and the Fire the other under the Hook and the Press of the Husbandman nothing less then the Cross the Wounds the Death of my Lord my God of his dearest Son made me a Saviour and by this Sacrament assures me I shall be kept up and fed with a supplie of all necessarie Blessings as certainlie as he gives me to taste that Bread and Wine the ordinarie meanes for preserving my life and strength Whilest we condemned Creatures were passing on to our Execution the Son of God looked upon us and took our Condemnation upon Himself and under it died in our stead Thus by the death and satisfaction of this Sacrifice Justice gave way to my Release God the Father forgave my Sin and God the Son procured my Life Then fall upon your Knees with all imaginable Reverence and say LEt the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be acceptable in thy sight O Lord my strength and my Redeemer Most gracious God who of thy great goodness hast ordained this Ordinance for a continual Remembrance ofâ— hat ever prevailing Sacrifice which thy infinite Wisdom and Love hast appointed and accepted upon the Cross for us vile helpless wretched Sinners make us truely sensible of all our offences against thee and of his Love and Sufferings for us and accept us in Him to the Praise of thy Grace Rebuke all unseasonable thoughts and imaginations stir up and act in us