are but simple women little able to doe either you or her that good which you might haue reaped by the word of God preached but yet if it please you to giue vs leaue wee will shew our mindes what a comfortable thing it is for man and wife to liue together in loue and charity Ezer Indeed I thinke no two women in the towne no nor in the whole country can shew it better then you because you know what it is by experience Abig. Wee thanke God wee both haue experience of it to our comforts and so would we that you had with the losse of the best horse or cow that either of vs haue Ezer I thanke you both and I had rather then the best gelding in my stable with twenty pound vpon his backe Abig. Seeing then that peace betweene man and wife is so comfortable you would so gladly enioy it with so great losse will you bee content to hearken and bee thankefull to God if that wee shew you a direct way how you and your wife might agree together as long as you shall liue Ezer Be contented say you yea be glad of the time that euer you set footing ouer my threshold I haue had so much vnquietnesse alreadie that me thinkes a little peace would be as a little paradice to my soule but yet if my wife did know that I desired and labored for peace shée would be the further off it except God wrought aboue ordinary in her Abig. We are but women therefore something bashfull as it beseemes vs to speake vnto you beeing a man of these matters yet vnder leaue and correction we will do our good wil to declare those things which wee haue learned and partly know by experience Ezer You are both ancient and I am but young and my wife also and therefore I would you could direct and tell vs a way how to liue quietly Abig. First of all before you can loue one another as you ought you must labour for the loue of God which must bee shed abroad in your heartes the which loue will cause you to loue one another Ezer I hope wee haue the loue of God already otherwise I am of the minde that hee would either punish vs or else take his blessings from vs. Abig. Doe you not thinke this a great punishment that you cannot agree Truly I may safely say that it is a punishment both to your bodies and soules Ezer I confesse indeed that it is a punishment but yet I hope that God loueth many men women that yet fall out betwixt themselues Abig. Surely if there bee continuall strife it is an euident signe that the Lord loueth not the one of them if not both Ezer But how should wee know whom it is that the Lord doth not loue Abig. They which are the cause of the continuing and breeding of the broiles Ezer That is my Xantip Abig. But who will you be iudged by Ezer By God and the country Abig. Well God iudgeth the heart for your selfe we haue heard that you haue a good report among your neighbours therefore I haue the better hope of you and therefore I pray you let me aske you one question Ezer Aske me two if you will I will tell you if I can I like your talke so well Abig. What thinke you is the loue of God to his children Ezer That is too hard a question for me to answer I doe not professe my selfe a Diuine Abig. But euery Christian ought to be a Diuine especially in such principles as the loue of God is without which none possible can be saued in this life nor in the life to come Ezer I do beleeue verily that whomsoeuer the Lord loues not them hee hates and whomsoeuer he hates vpon them abides his wrath and heauy displeasure till hee bestow vpon them his loue and therefore I pray you if you can shew me what the loue of God is and I will gladly heare you Abig. The singular loue of God vnto his elect is that whereby he loueth them in himselfe and hath adopted them in his sonne Christ before the foundations of the world and hereto pertaines predestination vocation the gift of faith and of the spirit iustification regeneration and eternall saluation with whatsoeuer is good comfortable and profitable for them in this life And here by your patience it shall not bee amisse to shew likewise the loue of Christ vnto his Church because we are to fetch our light from his candle Ezer I pray you do for I haue both good leasure and pleasure to heare you Abig. Our Lord Iesus Christ being in the throne of glory yea being the Lord of glory disrobed himselfe and came downe from heauen and of God became man for our sakes taking our nature vpon him endured much misery for the space of 30 yeares vpward was as an exile amongst his cruell enemies which reproched buffeted blasphemed persecuted him vnto death besides that hee suffered the wrathfull displeasure of his Father in his soule and the grieuous torments of hell that were due vnto vs that he might free vs therefrom as it is written The chastisemēt of our peace was laid vpon him by his stripes are we healed Esay 53. Hee was made a curse for the sinne of man that so man might in him bee blessed Therefore neighbour how ought these things to worke vpon our consciences and to force euery one of vs particularly to say O miserable wretch that I am that for my sinne my Sauiour should suffer such horrible punishment ô sweet Sauiour how am I bound to praise and thanke thee Who am I that thou shouldest thinke much lesse looke on me or doe any thing for me seeing that I haue so many waies offended thee But this is thy mercy yea thine incomprehensible and vnspeakeable loue that thou shouldest not onely free me from death and damnation but bring me to life and saluation euen to a better estate then Adam was in before his fall O the admirable mercy of God and the incomprehensible loue of Christ how am I bound vnto thee What thankes and praise is due vnto thy maiesty for these vnspeakeable blessings for that thou hast not onely freed me from eternal misery but hast brought me vnto euerlasting happines and made me one with thee as thou art one with thy Father that I might bee glorified in thee as thou art in him to this end thou hast made me bone of thy bone and flesh of thy flesh so that thou art become wholly mine with all things that belong to thee Eul. O good neighbour consider of this vnspeakeable loue of God and his Son Christ towards his whole Church in generall and to euery one of his children in particular how that the Lord of his free grace hath wrought in vs repentance and faith and hath shed his loue abroad in our hearts and assured vs of the frée pardon of all our sinnes and of his euerlasting loue
as the weaker vessels And againe that man and wife make but one body and againe that they should draw the yoke equally together Eul. Your wish is very good Abigail for want of due consideration is the neglect of true practise of all duties Ezer And truely neighbours it comes to my minde now that the Lord laid these duties of louing honoring their wiues vpon men partly because they are stronger and more able to beare and support the infirmities and weakenesses of their wiues then the wiues are of the husbands And againe that the husbands should not swell too much with their authority that they should not make their poores wiues as slaues but should account of them as themselues For the Lord knew very well that men are of such natures for the most part that if hee gaue thē power they would stretch it to the vttermost and therefore he abates their superiority and makes it in some measure equal with the wiues And further he would haue mā to know that this is his dignity to giue honour vnto the woman lest shee through the loftinesse of his minde should bee vsed crosly and vnkindly Eul. Lo neighbour lo yonder comes your wife Ezer Why how now wife where haue you bene all this while Xant Forsooth husband I haue bene about some speciall businesse that concerns you and me Ezer Why didst thou stay so long Xant I pray you good husband be not offended with mee and I will tell you Ezer I am glad that you are so humble and courteous if you hold on thus Xantip I hope that wee shall neuer fall out Xant I hope that I shall not onely continue but increase in doing my duty both to God and you Ezer And then I make no doubt but my loue shall be more and more extended vnto thee come and sit downe here and tell me where hast thou bene Xant If it shall please you husband I haue bene much troubled in my mind since I went foorth for some iars that haue bene betwéene vs. Ezer And I haue bene much quieted and comforted in my mind wife since thy comming in for the peace which I hope shall be betweene vs but proceede and say one Xant As I was comming home I spied a solitarie place which I went vnto there powred forth my complaints to the Lord praying his maiesty for pardon of my disobedience towards you al my abusing of you with my tong by railing speeches and that wee might more quietly liue together then we had done for I felt such horrible gripings within me that I thought my heart would haue burst and then came the trifling occasions of my falling out into my minde which made such horrible broiles and hurly burly betweene vs the which at the first I might haue stopt with a patient word but sinfull wretch that I was I rather opened a fountaine by my railing tong And thus as I was bewailing my miserable estate thinking what a hell it was for man wife to be at ods there comes by Maister T who seeing me all alone asked me what I did so solitary I could scarce speake to him for wéeping He oftē asked me what I ailed saying merrily it was more strāge to sée me wéepe thē fight further askt if we had faln out now I had got the foile I told him no we were not falne out but I was much grieued that we could kéepe no more in at which words he wondred and yet reioyced to sée me mourne And when hee perceiued that I was much afflicted in spirit for my offences he comforted me with these and such like words saying Blessed are they that mourne for they shall be comforted Blessed are they that go on their way weeping for they shall returne and bring their sheaues with them And applyed vnto me the swéete promises of God in Christ Iesus saying Christ saith Come vnto me ye that are thirsty buy of me wine without siluer And againe If any mā sin we haue an aduocate with the Father Christ Iesus the righteous And whē I cryed I haue sinned against my husbād more against God what shall I doe what shall I doe he would bid me possesse my soule in patience and beléeue in the Lord Iesus and take hold of his mercies by the hand of Faith and then though my sins were as redde as scarlet they should bee as white as woolle and that the Lord tooke no pleasure in the destruction of sinners but if they would turne from their euill wayes vnto him and continue in well doing vnto the end they should vndoubtedly be saued And when he had somwhat pacified my wounded spirit hee perswaded me to go with him to a Sermon I paused a little but at last went with him in a blessed howre I thank my God for I reaped more profit and comfort thereat then euer I did at any before Abig. The cause neighbour Xantip or rather the fault I may say hath bene in your selfe heretofore in that you haue not gone so humbled and with an vnfeigned desire to know and doe your duty Xant I acknowledge it to be so good neighbour Abigail and I pray God forgiue me that and all my other sins Abig. God hath promised to forgiue all that vnfeignedly repent of whom I make no doubt by that I haue now heard from your owne mouth that you are one Eul. What did the Preacher handle Xant He spake of the mutuall duties of man and wife and of both their duties towards God Ezer That was most excellent doctrine for vs wife Xant Yea indeede husband I thanke God it was most profitable and comfortable I wished you many a time there Ezer I thanke God and our good neighbours we haue bene well exercised here this afternoone also for I hope they haue done me more good then euer I thought women could haue done to man in that kinde Xant I thanke God also for it and I reioyce at it in my soule Ezer Well wife here is my hand and giue me thine and let vs renew our couenant which wee haue broken with God and toward each other And now let vs here vow both before God and our good neighbours Abigail and Eulalie through his grace to keepe the same inuiolate while we liue Xant Here husband here is both my hand and my heart Abig. Blessed praised bee our gracious God for his excéeding mercy now shewed to you both and I beséech his Maiestie that you may both kéepe your couenant with him and one with another while breath is in your bodies that when it shall be his pleasure to take you hence hee may receiue your soules and bodies into his glorious kingdome Ezer And blessed are you which through Gods mercy haue bene speciall instruments to do vs good and I with my wife accordingly as we are bound will not ceasse to praise God and to pray to him for you that hee would of his rich grace preserue and blesse you both with vs and all the rest that loue the comming of our Lord Iesus Christ to whom be all praise and thanks for euer Amen
draw out of himselfe what broyles haue bene betwixt you and when wee haue drawne out all his corruptions as cleane as wine out of a vessell then will wee put into him the heauenly liquor of holy doctrine and tell him how hee is to demeane himselfe towards you Xant Christ prosper our enterprises Eul. We may bee sure that hee will giue vs good successe if wee doe not crosse our selues So fare you well Abig. God spéede neighbour Ben-ezer how haue you done a long time Ezer Welcome neighbours welcome how do you Eul. Tell vs I pray you how doth your wife Ezer Euen like a shrew for any thing I know Eul. If I may be so bold as speaks it is better to be a sheepe Ezer I giue you my word gossip my wife is not a sheep nay I pray God shee proue not a wolfe Abig. It pleases men many times to speak their pleasures of their wiues though they be neuer so kind to them Ezer Kind my wife is so kind that I le warrant her shee will neuer kill mee with kindnesse for hers is contrary to nature and womannishnes for I thinke there is not a verier shrew and horribler scold liuing vpon the earth Abig. Yea but neighbour I pray you giue me liue you know that men are sometimes hasty and will moue their wiues to speake Ezer Speake say you As the saying is there is a difference betweene staring and starke madde so may I say there is a difference betweene speaking scolding For I will tell you neighbours I was but forth the other night somewhat late with a friend or two of mine but good Lord when I came home what a life shee kept I had no sooner put my head within doores but shee gaue mee such a terrible looke and vttered such an horrible voice that I thought verily that she would haue flowne in my face and haue scratched out mine eyes vttering these speeches Where the poxe haue you bene all this while Is not this a fine time to come home at You are welcome from your whores with a murraine a vengeance light vpon you and the deuill in hell fetch you I would you might breake your neck one night that I might be ridde of you some way or other Abig. Is it possible that she should be such a terrible woman Ezer If you did but heare her sometimes neighbours you would blesse your selues for I think in my conscience that she is as terrible as a Lyon as subtil as a serpent and as wicked as the diuell himselfe for what with her scolding what with her swearing and with her tumults and burstling vp and downe you would thinke the very house would fall vpon our heads Abig. O the vnspeakeable patience and mercie of our God that hee suffers such things vnpunished Eul. Good neighbour learne to beare with your wiues weakenes infirmities Ezer Infirmities what call you infirmities Abig. The wiues infirmitie toward her husband is when she cannot put vp wrong at his hands Ezer Put vp wrong shee will reuenge two rather then put vp one I thinke shee would vexe the patientest man vpon the earth sometimes shee moues mee so much that I am readie to beate out her braines Abig. God forbid I am verie much grieued to heare of such bitter contention berweene man and wife and so I am sure is my neighbour Eulaly Ezer I will tell you both but a little how shee hath vsed me If I spend but a teaster or tweluepence then shee railes vpon me as if I were her prentice boy that had stolne it from her or if I will not buy her this toy or that new-fangle this dainty morsell or that shee takes on like a mad woman saying that such a woman can haue this that for a word and why may not shée as well haue the same And if I be but foorth a little why then shee will raile vpon mee as if I were her slaue yea a diuell incarnate though many times shee is foorth halfe a day yea a whole day together shee thinkes I must say nothing if I doe it shall bee spread abroad ten times more shall be made of it then either I said or thought When she comes in if I doe but say in all gentle manner Xantip or wife where hast thou bene straight she will snappe me vp with this answere Why what care you or what haue to doe must I make you accounts marry muffe can I go no whither but you must know it I will aske you leaue when you are dead c. Or if I aske her why didst thou staie so long shee will answere If I had knowne my staying would haue angred you I would not haue come yet I will goe come when I list for all you If I speake her faire she thinkes I flatter her and will begin to frump and frowne if I threaten then she will bend her fists and tell mée to my face that I shall haue as good or worse then I bring and will stand daring and challenging mee for the blood in my belly c. What man thinke you can endure such a woman Eul. Indeed if al these things be true which you haue said shee hath bene much to blame but I hope neighbour that she wil become now a new woman if that you would but a little beare with her Ezer She is nought starke nought neuer speake for her I haue forborne her too much and too long I perceiue that if I giue her an inch shee will take an ell Abig. O neighbour good neighbour now be patient and doe but remember how wee deale with God and yet he waiteth with patience looking if at any time wee will turne vnto him and though we be obstinate still yet he offers himselfe vnto vs in loue whereas long ago iustly he might haue destroyed vs in the middest of our sinnes for euer Ezer I promise you Abigail you say true if God indeed were not very patient exceeding mercifull it would be wrong with vs. Eul. Therefore the long patience and goodnesse of God ought to leade vs to repentance and to deale fauourably and in tender compassion one with another Ezer You say true it should doe so indeed Abig. Yea and it must doe so too if we will be the Lords seruants as it is writtē Let your patiēt mind be knowne vnto all men the Lord is at hand Now if this one lesson were deepely written in our heartes by the holy Ghost wee would not be so readie to take reuenge one vpon another as we doe neither should such bitter and poysonful speeches proceed from vs as commonly do neither would wee put the euill day far from vs as the most doe but we would with speed depart from iniquity and waite diligently and continually for the comming of our Lord Iesus Christ Ezer Beleeue mée beléeue mée I would my Xantip were here to heare you I hope your good words will do her good Abig. Alas sir we
and fauour in his Sonne Christ Iesus our Lord and hath made vs one with himselfe his Sonne partakers of his diuine nature and hath filled our hearts with vnspeakeable comfort and ioy of the holy Ghost which wee desired so much in the daies of our affliction And further hath giuen vnto vs his Spirit which is the earnest pennie of our euerlasting happinesse and which doth sanctifie vs daily more and more and strengthen vs to euery good worke and hath promised that no good thing shall be wanting vnto vs if we will be obedient vnto him How ought these things to cause vs to loue God againe and for his sake to loue one another seeing that he of his méere mercy hath made vs partakers of such happinesse Ezer They are happy indeede that haue all these things bestowed vpon them which you haue spoken of Abig. Euery true Christian is in such a happy estate before they can find sound comfort vnto their soules or before they can performe any duty pleasing vnto God or before they can loue their wiues as they ought Ezer Then there are but few that loue their wiues as they ought Abig. It is true indéed and more is the pitty For some loue their wiues for their lusts sake some for their beauties sake some for their riches sake some for their friends sake some for natures sake some for necessities sake because they sée if they should not it would not stand with their quiet profite credit But take once away the aforesaid causes their loue falles to the ground If it bee for lust when that is satisfied he rather hates thē loues her as Ammon did his sister 2. Sam. 13.15 if for beauty as that vanisheth his loue decaieth if for riches nature or friends sake as they lessen his loue lessens with them if it be for necessitie it is counterfaite or if she winne his loue as some doe by her faire language then it turneth as the winde Finally if it be for any outward cause or for all the causes vnder the cope of heauen without the loue of God it will bee vncomfortable vnconstant and vnsound but if it be for the loue of God though for no other cause in the earth it wil be vndefiled comfortable continuall and increase more and more But all loue else whatsoeuer that proceedes from the husbande to the wife and from the wife to the husband is rebellion against God and the more a man loues his wife or the wife her husband the more they sinne against God Howsoeuer this may séeme harsh vnto worldly men yet that which doth ensue will make it plaine for the more that both husband and wife loue each other without louing God the more they will seeke to fulfill their fleshly lusts though they be neuer so much against God and his word Therfore it behoues euery man to loue his wife with such loue as Christ did his Church Ezer What manner of loue was that Abig. It was not fleshly but spirituall not earthly but heauenly Ezer But must he not loue her outwardly and prouide such things for her as are necessary profitable and comfortable for the preseruing and cherishing of her body Abig. Yes it is the part and dutie of euery man chiefly of a Christian so to doe as I would haue shewed you anon or else he shall not onely sinne against her but against God also Ezer I pray you now shew how a man must first shew his loue to his wife and what is the first fruit of his loue Abig. In the first place hee must giue himselfe vnto God with fasting prayer that the Lord would blesse his enterprises and proceedings and when he hath humbled himselfe vnto God he must not thinke much to humble him selfe to his wife Eul. This wil be harsh vnto the most men and they will hardly or neuer bee brought vnto it Abig. But if they will be Christian men they must do it and that for these causes First because it is not hurtfull but good and profitable not against the word but warrantable and commanded by it And lastly because Christ hath giuen them example so to do Eul. I pray you if you can shew these things more plainly Abig. For the first if you looke from the beginning of Genesis to the latter end of the Apocalypse you shall neuer finde it spoken against either openly nor inclusiuely and therupon I gather that seeing it is profitable it may bee practised in a ciuil and courteous manner And againe humility is a vertue and the more eminent place a man is in the more it doth adorne him if he be endued with it And further though he bee in neuer so high a place hee is commanded to humble himselfe to his brethren yea and to make himselfe as he is a Christian equall with them of the lower sort Now if it bee his dutie to humble himselfe towards euery one to make himselfe equall with those of the lowest sort then much more to his wife Againe they are commanded to honour their wiues as the weaker vessels that is as I take it not onely to beare with their wiues infirmities but to submit their mindes vnto them in that which is good kindly to intreate them in humblenesse of minde and to aduance their credit and good name and to stand in their defence against whomsoeuer that oppose themselues against them And lastly by Christs example they are to be lowly and humbly to submit themselues vnto their wiues as he doth vnto his Church and people Ezer How doth Christ humbly submit himselfe vnto his Church and people Abig. Christ doth submit and humble himselfe vnto his Church and people both in himselfe and by others His submissiō is shewed both by his words gesture and actions By his words when he louingly intreats her to leaue her corruptions and to accept of his louing fauour and kindnesse which he offers vnto her as a token of his loue and vnfaigned desire he hath that she should bee at peace with him and to the end that he might win her loue hee makes many gracious and beauteous promises vnto her yea hee bestowes many rich treasures vpon her suing wooing of her and sometimes when she turnes her backe vpon him hee turnes his face to her saying what ailes my loue my doue my vndefiled spouse when she is sad he wil make her ioyful many times when shée frownes hée will looke vpon her with a chearefull countenance And againe he attendeth and waiteth at the gates of her portall saying Behold I stand at the doore and knocke open vnto me my loue my doue and vndefiled And moreouer for his Churches sake which is his wife he bended his knées and humbled himselfe vnto the earth yea vnto death and that vnto the most shamefull and horrible death of the crosse What baesnesse did hee refuse to honour her Consider the reproches and indignities he endured of the paines miseries