that should light upon her Children by the Stomachfulness that was in Rachel Jer. 31. 15. Weeping for her Children she would not be comforted Men have no Ear to hearken to what may be said for God and therefore are resolved to hold the Bitterness of their own Thoughts This stubborn Pettishness and wilful Grief may be sometimes in God's own Chosen it was in Iacob Gen. 37. 35. He refused to be comforted for he said I will go down into the Grave unto my Son mourning I will it was a stomached wilful Grief Christians by a perverse peevish justifying of their Passions they say of their Sorrows as Ionah did of his Anger Ionah 4. 9. I do well to be angry When Men take it for granted they do well in it they resolve then to shut their Ears against whatever might appease and quiet their Thoughts 3. Such as are impatient and discontented as if God had not dealt wisely or worthily with them When a full Vessel is shaken the Water will plash over And when there is such a Tumult in the Heart unseemly Expressions will drop from us as if God should not have dealt thus with us as to take away these Comforts in which were all our Solace the Staff and the Stay of the Family We that are Neighbours are apt very often in Discontent to say What a serviceable and useful Person hath God taken away and so many bad ones left as if God had not made a right choice Foolish Man would be accounted wiser than God But if a Man were well skilled in God's Attributes he would never murmur especially if he did but consider this cometh from a Wise God The Cause of all the Disorder in the Heart is the want of fearing God's Name we are not skilled in his Attributes Alphonsus blasphemously said Si in principio mundi ipse Deo adfuisset multa melius ornatiusque condenda essent things should have been ordered better if he had been of God's Council Many of you do not utter such Expressions but yet too often conceive such Thoughts in your Hearts you will not think so ay but what mean the bleating of the Sheep and the lowing of the Oxen such Expressions as these O! would to God I had died first as David 2 Sam. 18. 33. O Absalom my Son my Son would to God that I had died for thee And again would to God I had been dead a long time ago rather than to survive my Happiness all my Estate gone in an instant as Brethren in these empty trying Times it is many a Man's Case but remember foolish Man the All-wise God thought it fittest for thee Yet thus doth the Prophet Elijah when he was driven into the Wilderness by Jezebel 1 Kings 19. 4. in a Discontent requests for himself that he might die It is enough now O Lord take away my Life 4. Such as unfit for Duty Affections are no further lawful than they fit for Duty When Grief taketh off our Hearts from the Duties of our general or particular Calling it is an evil Grief See Gen. 35. 19 21. Rachel died and was buried and Israel journied and spread his Tent. Having lost so dear a Wife he doth not stand puling by the Tomb but Israel journied he went on about his Business We ought so far to be sensible of Providence as may serve to quicken us to Duty not to hinder us There is a great Question now whether we ought to fear or hope in our Misery some of one side cry down Fear some on the other side cry down Hope Why Brethren there is not much Matter in the Exercise of either of these Affections but according as they do more or less quicken you to Duty If you be the more earnest in Prayer because you hope Success is near truly that is a good Disposition of Heart if because Fear that is the most unchristian I confess Fear is good when it ends in Duty Iehosaphat feared and set himself to seek the Lord 2 Chron. 20. 3. And Noah moved with Fear prepared an Ark Heb. 11. 7. Brethren the bare Exercise of Affections is but a natural and an indifferent thing the great Trial of them is when they fit you the more for the Service that God requires of you Therefore when Persons grieve so for the Loss of an Husband Wife Children or Estate that they have no mind to pray no mind to go about their Callings with any Comfort that is an evil Grief It is true that God winketh at some Omissions of Duties for a small while in such cases till we are able to manage our Thoughts and digest our Sorrow and the Letter of the Law giveth place to such great Necessities as Aaron's Excuse is but reasonable Levit. 10. 19. Such things have befallen me this Day that if I had eaten the Sin-offering should it be accepted with the Lord The Death of his two Sons though he held his Peace he could not tell how for the present to frame his Heart to a joyful Duty As if a Minister cannot tell how to bring his Heart to preach if God hath entered upon his Family taken away a Wife or Children thence I confess this cometh from Corruption but in such Cases God winketh at it for a short time The Reasons are 1. Because otherwise our Carriage would be very dishonourable and derogatory to Jesus Christ as if he were not better to us than all the Comforts that we lose 1 Sam. 1. 8. as Elkana said to Hannah Why weepest thou am not I better to thee than ten Sons So why weepest thou Is not Christ better to thee than ten Wives ten Children ten Parents a thousand times as much as thou hast lost If we had but Faith to see it Christ is to a Believer whatever he wanteth The People of God in the Wilderness wanted Houses Psal. 90. 1. Lord thou art our Habitation A Christian hath never more Comfort than when he seeth that particular thing made up in Christ which was taken from him by the Providence of God If a Believer has lost her Husband she seeth Christ her Husband So for any other Relation if a Parent seeth Christ his Parent if a Brother Christ's a Brother We are to Christ instead of all these Relations and therefore why should not Christ be so to us See Matth. 12. 50. Whosoever doth the Will of my Father the same is my Brother and Sister and Mother Mark we are so to him and therefore why should we not account Christ to be so to us Certainly it is a great Dishonour and Disparagement to him if we do not see all our Losses abundantly made up in him 2. It would be a Dishonour to our Profession It is a Credit to Christianity that the Professors of it can be joyful in all Conditions Heb. 10. 34. Ye took joyfully the spoiling of your Goods 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 though all they had were snatch'd from them by rude Hands yet they were joyful Let guilty
shall be bestowed upon the Saints Is Immortality set before me and yet I so glued to this mortal Life that the Interests and Concernments thereof so fill up my Time and Thoughts that these Heavenly Objects are too seldom thought of and presented to my Mind An eternal Life is offered in the Gospel to all those that by Faith lay hold on it and yet I Fool that I am so solicitous for this temporal Life this animal this perishing this fading Life so that I do too too much neglect my precious immortal never-dying Soul so that should I hereafter be banished thy comfortable Presence and excluded from those Joys and Pleasures that are injoyed by those admitted to thy Kingdom and Glory I could blame none but my self who have not in a due manner sought the Welfare of my Soul I have a blessed Hope of the glorious Appearance of the Great God and our Saviour Jesus Christ which I pretend to look long and wait for but do I live as an Expectant of such tremendous Appearances Can I with Comfort and Confidence and Hope look for this glorious Appearance of the great God when he shall come in flaming Fire taking Vengeance on them that know him not nor obey his Gospel If I be found in this Number how sad and deplorable will my Case be Help me O Lord to search and see how Matters go with my Soul If thou art not in Christ If I have not got an Interest in God the Father Son and Spirit there will be no blessed Hope for me but a fearful Expectation of the fiery Indignation that shall consume his Adversaries O! to be found an Enemy to God and he an Enemy to any at Death and Judgment is an astonishing thing therefore fly for Refuge lay hold on the Hope set before you Christ is the only Refuge for a poor undone Sinner to fly to in his Name and for his Sake thou mayst be accepted and not only pardoned but restored to Favour and Friendship Not only be delivered from the Terrors of Hell but be made an Heir of Eternal Life O blessed are those that have secured an Interest in the Eternal God for to those he will be a Sun and Shield he will give Grace and Glory And though they may meet with many Troubles in this Life many Ups and Downs in the World yet if they bear it with Patience Heaven will make amends and will pay for all I am sensible O Lord that I stand in need of a great Almighty Power to keep me from falling let me be kept through Faith unto Salvation Let me not be frustrated of that blessed Hope that thy Word reveals whereof many shall be Partakers O let not me be excluded but permit me to be a Beholder of those glorious Appearances that shall be revealed to all those that love serve and obey thee If thou shouldst say unto me I know thee not depart from me thou hast wrought Iniquity and done foolishly therefore depart depart into everlasting Fire Though this Sentence would be severe it would be but just for I have deserved a perpetual Banishment and Separation from thy comfortable Presence But Lord suffer me to plead with thee Is there not a Refuge for poor distressed Sinners to fly to even the Blood of Christ which cries louder for Mercy than my Sins can cry for Vengeance In him alone I desire to be found for his sake only I desire Acceptance O let not my Name be blotted out of thy Book but give me some comfortable and sure Evidence that I am thine that so I may run the Ways of thy Commands and not tire and wax weary but may by a patient Continuance in Well-doing seek for that Glory Honour and Immortality and that Eternal Life which thou hast laid up for those that persevere in Holiness and go from one Degree of Grace to another till they come to appear before thee their God in Sion Hold out Faith hold out Patience it will not be long O my Soul e're thou be at thy Journey 's End therefore do and suffer the Will of God patiently If he see sit to deprive thee of those Comforts that thou hast and dost now injoy be content e're long it will not be a Pin to choose what part thou hast acted here upon the Stage of this World You must shortly appear before the Judgment-Seat of Christ that you may receive according to the things done in the Body whether it be good or bad O what a dreadful and fearful Account have I to give the Sins of my Youth and riper Age are so many and so great that I am confounded and amazed when I though slightly take a View of them My Omissions and my Commissions my original and my actual Sins are such that I cannot bear the Scrutiny of my own Conscience how then shall I do when the Almighty contends with me My Sins of Ignorance and Sins against Knowledg my presumptuous Sins my Abuse of Mercies my Incorrigibleness under Judgments my Unthankfulness for former Mercies and my Distrust of the Goodness of God for the future these may justly provoke God to depart from me and say he will have no more to do with such a vile Wretch as I am But blessed Father I humbly implore that thou wilt not leave nor forsake the Work of thy own Hands Thou canst make me clean O when shall it once be Let my Sins be all done away and let me me poor Sinner be made meet to partake of thy Kingdom and Glory O that my Saviour would say as Paul did of Philemon What he oweth put that on mine Account Lord my Sins are so many and so foul that I cannot answer for one of a thousand how then shall I appear before thy Tribunal where I must give a strict Account of all I have done in the Body whether it be bad or good Lord I cannot answer for my numberless Number of Sins Since thou hast dear Redeemer died for Sinners let me not die in my Sins Thou hast paid a sufficient Price for the Sins of the whole World let not mine be laid to my Charge nor rise up against me in this World to shame me nor in the other to condemn me Remit my Debt too vast for me to pay before the last accounting Day Let me have some well-grounded Hope that the State of my Soul is in good Plight that however it goes with my Body and bodily Concerns that I may be assured it will go well with me to all Eternity and then I may be inabled to bear the Inconveniences of my Pilgrimage-State Lord I humbly beg thou wouldst take Care of me and provide for me what thou in thy infinite Wisdom and Goodness seest fit for me and let me be perfectly willing to be do and suffer what my God seeth good not my Will but thine O Lord be done in all things only I beg I may not be left to unsupportable Difficulties Let me have thy Love
Deal with me as thou usest to do to those that love thy Name Lord I hope I love thee Lord I desire to love thee and to be beloved by thy blessed Majesty and then all the Afflictions that I meet with will make no Breach between thy self and my poor Soul Thou art pleased to afflict me very sore but I do not I dare not I will not say unto thee What dost thou for thou givest no Account of thy Matters It is my Duty to submit admire not to quarrel at thy Providences therefore with all humble Submission I acquiesce to thy Sovereign Will saying as my Blessed Saviour Not my Will but thine O Lord be done PAPER VI. I Am willing to recount some of those many Mercies God hath been pleased to bestow upon me to excite my Self to Thankfulness and to incourage me still to trust in and wait upon that good God who hath bestowed so many Mercies upon me the least of which I am altogether unworthy of I may say with David While I live will I praise the Lord I will sing Praises to my God while I have any Being to that God who hath bestowed my Life Health my Strength my Memory my Reason my Understanding and all the Blessings of this Life upon me and hath through Grace given me Hopes of dwelling with himself in Glory when this miserable Life shall be ended O my Soul praise thou the Lord O give Thanks unto the Lord for he is good for his Mercy endureth for ever Remember the Goodness of God to thee from the very Womb to this very Day nay before thou hadst a Being in this World God was pleased to form thee and write all thy Members in a Book or else what an imperfect Creature might I have been if there had been an Eye or an Ear or any part wanting O that I could be truly thankful for these Mercies I desire with Thankfulness to remember the Dealing of God to me in my Infancy and Childhood How many Dangers and Accidents have I been liable and exposed to and yet God hath been pleased to take Care of me and preserved me from innumerable Mischiefs that have compassed me about I look upon it as no small Blessing that I was born of Christian Religious and Pious Parents such as did truly fear God and did what in them lay to instruct their Posterity in early Piety they were those that frequently addressed themselves to the Throne of Grace the Benefit of whose Prayers I hope to reap both in Life and Death I desire with Thankfulness to own the Goodness of God in taking Care of me and providing for me when I was left motherless in my tender Age when I was uncapable of minding my self yet then was God pleased to raise me up Friends that were careful kind and tender of me some of which did instruct me in the best things and were very solicitous for the Good of my poor Soul and did daily counsel instruct and admonish me to mind my Creator in the Days of my Youth and to live continually as one that must one Day give an Account of all the Good or Evil done in the Body And that you may see how the Goodness of God hath followed me all my Days I will endeavour to recollect those many comfortable Places of Scripture which have been of most excellent Use to me to comfort support and incourage me in many Difficulties and Troubles I have met with some of which I hope will ever keep my Spirits from sinking In my younger Years being seized on by a severe Fit of Illness that comfortable Place was a Support to me Heb. 13. 5. Be content with such things as you have for he hath said I will never leave thee nor forsake thee I was well satisfied with my present Condition though painful and sick enough hoping that God would not leave me nor forsake me Some time after being in great Fear and Danger of some approaching Evil that incouraging Place was brought to my Mind Isa. 41. 10. Fear thou not for I am with thee be not dismayed for I am thy God I will strengthen thee yea I will help thee yea I will uphold thee with the right Hand of my Righteousness This Place vanished all my Fears and caused me to put my Trust and Confidence in the Almighty God who never faileth those that rely on him Afterwards when I came to part with Children though this Affliction was very heavy God was pleased to mitigate it by the Consideration that there was a Name better than that of Sons and Daughters and though God saw fit to deprive me of them for wise Reasons I doubt not yet he was pleased to silence me under his Hand by the Considerations of Heb. 12. 5 6. My Son despise not thou the chastening of the Lord nor faint when thou art rebuked of him for whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth and scourgeth every Son whom he receiveth I have sometimes thought that if I were assured of the Love of my Heavenly Father I could then bear any Affliction Lord I beg I may be truly humbled that I have deserved so many severe Scourges and yet Lord I would be thankful that thou art pleased though by the Rod to bring me home to thy Blessed Self When my dear Husband hath met with many Losses and Crosses I have been apt to be desponding and cast down but God hath mercifully composed me by the Consideration of Matth. 6. 25 26 c. There I see that God clothes the Grass and feeds the Fowls and hath bidden poor Creatures not to be anxious for these outward things assuring us that our Heavenly Father knoweth we have need of these things and that he will graciously supply the Wants of those that seek to him Phil. 4. 6. He hath bidden me to be careful for nothing but in every thing by Prayer and Supplication with Thanksgiving to let my Request be made known unto him and God hath incouraged poor Souls to cast their Care on him letting them know he careth for them What should I go to for Comfort if I had not the Word of the Eternal God to fly to It would be endless to reckon up the thousand Parts of those refreshing comforting and quickning Places that are to be had in the Word of God to comfort poor disconsolate Souls in all Conditions of Life and it ought to be took notice of how God is pleased to sute them to our present Conditions of Life I was once so perplexed with groundless Fears of Troubles that I was for some time unfit for any thing but my good God was pleased to fix upon my Mind Psal 23. 1. The Lord is my Shepherd I shall not want There was then no room left for any tormenting Fears but they all vanished away at the Consideration of the Happiness of those that have so careful a Shepherd It is my earnest Request that God will own me as one of his Flock however he deal
in some measure bethink my self and consider my latter End Lord I have reason to conclude that few Sands remain in my Glass to run With what Astonishment Anguish and Trouble may I review my Life past not one Thought Word or Action but needs a Pardon I blush to see how vile I have been and if I cannot bear the Scrutiny of my own Conscience how shall I abide thy severe Trial who hath kept an exact Account of all my Sins and Offences A numberless Number of Sins may be charged upon me which I confess I have been guilty of To whom shall I betake my self for Relief and Mercy but to thee O my gracious God for that I have heard that the God of Israel is a merciful God that he is slow to Anger and plenteous in Mercy that he doth abundantly pardon and forgive the Sins Offences and Provocations of his poor Creatures and therefore as I would not presume so I dare not despair Lord I fly from the Throne of thy Justice to the Throne of thy Mercy and humbly implore Pity Pardon and Compassion for thy Son's sake Magnify thy Grace in pardoning me though my Sins have abounded let thy free Grace superabound Blot out all my Sins out of the Book of thy Remembrance and let my Name be written in the Book of Life Let me be meet for the Inheritance of the Saints in Light when this earthly Cottage shall crumble to Dust. Let me be admitted to that Building an House not made with Hands eternal in the Heavens Let not me though unworthy be excluded from thy Presence Look on me in and through thy well-beloved Son in whom only thou art well pleased and for his sake be reconciled to me a vile Wretch By his Stripes let me be healed I have nothing to plead for my self only the Satisfaction of my Blessed Saviour on whom alone I rely for Pardon and Life Give me some undeniable Evidence that I do belong to the Election of Grace and that within a little while I shall be released from this Body of Sin and Death and shall be made perfectly blessed in a full Injoyment of thee to all Eternity Let me have some comfortable Hopes and Foretaste of a blessed Immortality to sweeten my Passage through and out of this World I am hastning and posting apace into an endless Eternity O that I were ready for my Appearance at thy Bar. Ah Lord if my Judg be not my Advocate with what Dread and Astonishment must I needs think of thy Tribunal where I must appear before a Heart-searching and a Sin-revenging God! There is not one Sin in my whole Life but is seen to thine all-seeing Eye and is all naked and open to thee Lord I would humbly beg that my Sins though many and great may all be pardoned and forgiven Many horrid Sinners have been received to Mercy and though my Sins are of a Crimson and Scarlet Dye yet the Blood of an All-sufficient Saviour can wash them white He is able and willing to save all those that come to God through him and he ever lives to make Intercession for them Help me by Faith to lay hold on this Redeemer who came into the World on this very Errand to save poor Sinners and reconcile them to God If so I dare not I will not despair yet Lord I beg I may not presume Help me humbly to cast my self prostrate at thy Feet and implore thy Heavenly Benediction Bless me even me in turning me away from all my Sins let them never separate between thee and my poor Soul Let them all be remitted and then it will be as if they had never been committed In my last and sorest Agonies let me see thou art reconciled to me Be with me till I die and when I die and when this World can yield me no Help Comfort or Support let me find it all in thee I know thy Presence can sweeten all the Troubles of this Life and Death it self Then let me not be dismayed at that last and great Enemy When I pass thorow the Valley and Shadow of Death I will fear no Evil for thou wilt be with me O Lord I beg thou wouldst not then be a Terror to me Thou art my Hope in the Day of Evil Help me then to hold up my Head with Comfort hoping my Redemption draweth nigh Let not this World have such possession of my Heart and Affections as to make me unwilling to dislodg and go hence when thou callest me off the Stage of this Life Let the last Scene of my Life be the best part of my Days Let me honour thee by doing thy Will and submitting to whatever thou my God shalt think fit to lay on me Help me to bear patiently thy afflicting Hand either Sickness or worldly Crosses or Death it self Let me not dare to murmur grumble or complain when Death looks me in the Face Let me not be too much daunted startled and affrighted at its Approach Thousands and ten thousands have gone through that dark Passage and shot that Gulph and there is no escape for any of the Children of Adam they that have deserved Death Eternal have no cause to grumble at Death Temporal especially if it be unstung nay then there 's Cause of Triumph for it is an Entrance into Life and Messenger to Glory therefore I hope and firmly believe and trust that that God who hath conducted so many safe through those dark Regions will not leave my poor Soul in its last Conflicts PAPER X. I Sensibly find my outward Man perish and decay but how comfortable would it be to me if I could as easily perceive the inward Man to be renewed day by day This Earthly Tabernacle is tottering and e're long will tumble down but in what plight is the poor Soul that now inhabiteth this ruinated Cottage What Provision hath it made against that Day when it must be turned out hath it got an Interest in and a Title to an enduring Substance a House above eternal in the Heavens This Life of mine is but a Vapour it appeareth but for a little while and then vanisheth away Lord teach me to number my Days that I may know how frail I am This outward Man is daily consuming wasting perishing and decaying and shall I be careless negligent remiss and unconcerned about my future State how it will go with me hereafter in the other World Though my bodily Strength abate yet let the inward Man be renewed every Day and wax stronger and stronger When the Comforts of this Life are as Iob saith of the White of an Egg unsavory have no Relish and are no Satisfaction to me let me have Comforts and Cordials that this World knoweth not of even the Light of thy Countenance and that will put Gladness into my Heart more than all the Treasures and Pleasures of this vain World Whatever thou deniest me deny me not thy self to be my God and Portion and let me have an
Interest in thy Son my only Saviour and Redeemer and do thou graciously give thy Holy Spirit to direct guide quicken counsel and comfort me the remaining part of my sojourning here How few Days may put a Period to my Life I know not In all probability it will not be long before I leave the Stage of this World and be summoned before the Bar of God to give a strict and impartial Account of my past Life O it is an awful thing to die and come to Judgment I beg O Lord I beg that I may be made meet for the Inheritance of the Saints in Light Sanctify me wholly let my whole Spirit Soul and Body be preserved blameless unto the Coming of my Lord Jesus Christ. O be thou pleased to preserve me unto thy Heavenly Kingdom Many Fears and much Ground for Fears have I that I shall never enter into Rest But blessed Lord do not exclude me from thy comfortable Presence hereafter Do thou make me fit to be a Member of those blessed Inhabitants of the New Ierusalem Though I am altogether unworthy yet if thou O Lord please to account me worthy I may then be so happy as to stand before the Son of Man with Courage and Comfort Keep thou me by thy Almighty Power through Faith unto Salvation Let me be preserved from fainting sinking and desponding in my last Conflicts and Agonies Let me see thee who art invisible and with an Eye of Faith look within the Vail whence I look for the Saviour the Lord Jesus Christ to change this vile Body of mine that it may be fashioned like to his glorious Body Let this Saviour be my Saviour and Redeemer even the Lord Jesus Christ and let me be assured that he is mine and I am indeed his and that this vile contemptible wretched Body shall be changed and made like to his glorious and blessed Body This is such an Honour and Privilege that I have hardly a Face to ask But I find a Warrant in thy Word to look long expect pant and wait for so happy a Day and Time as to be in a sinless State and Condition where we shall see our Saviour and be like him where earthly Troubles and Sorrows shall vanish and decay where the World the Flesh and the Devil shall have no Power to tempt molest or disturb those that thou O Lord God Almighty shalt admit into thy Heavenly Kingdom and Glory O blessed Souls that are here owned by thee approved by thee and shall at last be received by thee into those Eternal Mansions above Lord I humbly put in for a Share in these inestimable Mercies and Privileges Earthly things cannot content me without some Hopes some Prospect some Glimpse of thy Love and Favour If thou afford me this I may then bear the Inconveniencies the Hardships and ill Usage I meet with here in this howling Desart Let not my Unworthiness be a Bar and Hindrance to hinder good things from me Look not on me as in my self a vile polluted wretched undone Creature but behold me in and through thy well-beloved Son and for his sake alone be gracious and merciful to me I have been guilty of black and horrid Sins and Millions of Sins have I been committing daily without Sense Sorrow or Remorse O may such a Sinner as I find Mercy Lord I sometimes doubt and despair and conclude there is no Hopes for me I fear Heaven-Gate is shut against me and though I cry and knock it may all be in vain Lord I cannot bear such a Thought as to think I am rejected forsaken and cast off by thee I e'n cry out with the Jailor What shall I do to be saved What shall I do to obtain Eternal Life I find many comfortable Promises in thy Word to repenting and returning Sinners that those that come to thee thou wilt in no wise cast out and that the Blood of Jesus Christ thy Son cleanseth from all Sins Lord I desire to come to thee and come in a right manner and humbly beg thou wilt not cast me out nor cast me off as one whom thou no more canst love Let me have the Benefit of that healing cleansing Peace-speaking Blood of the Lamb of God which taketh away the Sins of the World I find in thy Word a black Catalogue of Sins and Sinners too who have been guilty of gross Offences whose Crimes would certainly exclude them Heaven unless thy unlimited Mercy and Compassion had inclined thee to look with Pity on them When the Apostle had mentioned those foul and horrid Sins that should deprive poor Souls of the Joys of Heaven he immediately for the Benefit of After-Ages and the Comfort of desponding Souls adds But such were some of you but ye are washed but ye are sanctified but ye are justified in the Name of the Lord Iesus and by the Spirit of our God Lord thou alone knowest what numberless Numbers of Sins I am guilty of and for which e're long I shall be summoned to give a strict and severe Account Lord I have nothing to plead for my self why I should not be condemned but I humbly cast my self at the Throne of thy Grace and implore Mercy Mercy Lord Mercy I need without this I cannot live comfortably nor die safely O let me even me be washed let me be sanctified let me be justified in the Name of the Lord Jesus let me be a Partaker of the Benefits of his Death Resurrection Ascension and Intercession and let me be assured I am one of those that shall live and reign with him World without end In my sorest Distresses and last Agonies and Conflicts let me see thee a God in Covenant and reconciled to me Let not my Evidences for Heaven be then to get When I come to die let me have nothing to do but to die and surrender up my Soul into the Hands of that God who gave it me Let not the Foresight or Prospect of Death be so terrifying as to overwhelm me and cause me to fall from thee Be with me when I pass through the dark and dismal Passage of Death When Flesh Heart and all Creature-Comforts fail and forsake me O Blessed Lord be thou the Strength of my Heart and my Portion for ever-more PAPER XI WORK while it is Day the Night is coming in which none can work Now is the Day of God's Patience and Forbearance this is the only time that God hath allotted for Work and Service He that doth the Work for which he came into the World faithfully and carefully shall in the Evening of the Day receive a bountiful Reward but if he neglects his Opportunity and squanders away his Time in Idleness and Sloth the Night will surprise him and then it will be too late to begin that Work which before he would not be perswaded to set about This Counsel is serious and grave every one hath Work to do O that all would be convinced of this great Truth we have Souls to