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A94794 A legacy for saints; being several experiences of the dealings of God with Anna Trapnel, in, and after her conversion, (written some years since with her own hand) and new coming to the sight of some friends, they have judged them worthy of publike view; together with some letters of a latter date, sent to the congregation with whom she walks in the fellowship of the Gospel, and to some other friends. Trapnel, Anna.; Proud, John, fl. 1654.; Ingold, Caleb. 1654 (1654) Wing T2032; Thomason E806_1; ESTC R207169 57,632 72

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ready to fall flat on the plain ground I have had sometimes so great ravishing of spirit when I have been alone in a room by my self my outward man hath been so altered on a sudden to the view of those that have been in the house which have found me alone and not able to speak to them for a season so that they have been frighted thinking me not to be in health and they beholding the tears falling from my eyes have wondred what I ailed but it was because the Son of righteousness shone hot upon my spirit which caused a melting into tears and many Scriptures opened to me which I spoke to them that sat by which have been astonished to hear and see a poor creature so filled but it was Christ in me making use of me to publish the excellency of Jesus Christ which my soul was so enamoured with that my old Aunt sitting by me said she had lived above threescore years and yet never felt such joy of the spirit and yet a very godly woman she wept to see me so her heart was much affected And this year in which I was new-born I shall the Lord helping me give forth some few of those discoveries which whole volumes cannot contain Let free grace have all the glory Oh to be in Christ who can tell out his or her estate night and day How pleasant is it Such a one where ever it goes cannot but set forth it s beloved it cannot tell how to speak of any thing else but Christ it cannot tarry there where it may not speak of its Saviour no language is pleasant to it but that wherein its God is exalted oh how sweet was my sleeping and waking still I had rest in the bosom o● Jesus oh what a great delight I had to be amongst the Saints and my heart was full of zeal for his glory oh what an eagerness and forwardness there is to receive good and to do good in that time of the souls first conversion then it s forward to suffer any thing for Christ nick names are nothing to it scandals and reproaches it can trample under foot but when the doctrine of free grace was nick-named as some would tell me it was a doctrine of liberty to sin then I could not but speak sharply to such I found no doctrine leading to holiness so much as it no salve drawing out corruptions and ill humors like this no plaister healing the most desperate wound like the plaister of free grace its cleansing physick it runneth between the marrow and the bones sinners would you be rid of bloody sins Free grace hath opened a fountain for to wash in not onely your feet but head and hands yea your whole man in this fountain I was cleansed by this wine my drooping spirits were revived Christ was that good Samaritan that found me wounded whom the Law nor Priest did not pitty legall threatnings and legall promises looked upon me but pissed by and left me wallowing in blood and pained with wounds and if it had not been for that tender hearted Samaritan Jesus Christ I had perished oh how comfortable was his oyl and wine to my wounds great was his care for me no tender mother like to Jesus the Saints told me when I mourned for the loss of my tender mother that Christ would be more tender and would be all to me in the loss of earthly comforts and he was more to me then they told me he was double comfort and a Comforter that hath tarried and abided with me and will abide with me for ever a Comforter that was still revealing love and bringing love tokens to my soul and setting before me varieties of dishes at every bankquet for a year together my meat was sweet meats from heaven my drink wine upon the lees wines well refined milk and hony was my ordinary dish the least appearance of God was marvellous sweet some days and nights I had feasts full of marrow and visious full of glory In the night before sleep had seized upon me a bright light shined round my head visible and in the midst of that light stood one all in white in the likeness of a creature all covered with brightness my outward man at this light was stricken very weak and all in a sweat but I received much joy and was bid by the inward speaking of the spirit not to fear for I had seen an Angell surely it was a very glorious vision such a perfume was left in my spirits all that night and my strength of body given me as soon as this vision was ended and I was full of triumphing in the Lord who killeth and maketh alive oh how sweet are true visions oh that I could praise more that God that hath is and will be gracious to me for ever my song was when the sentence of death was on my earthly Tabernacle by reason of illness I still was filled with this joyfull long Oh death where is thy sting Oh grave vvhere is thy victory Death vvas still presenced vvithout a sting and the Lavv vvithout strength these vvere novv dissolved and gone and I savv an accomplishment of the great vvork of Redemption by Jesus Christ I could not but dance before this Ark though Michols mocked I must declare that I was past from Mount Sinai into the Regions of Mount Sion where I saw an end of the Law for Righteousness sake to every one that believes not that I was now without Law unto God neither despised I any part of the Law but beheld it good if a man or woman use it lawfully the Apostle could not have said the Law had been faulty as in the Hebrews But in respect of our corruptness in the using of it we it were that were faulty not the Law in it self that was pure but I looked not where I might not onely see it in its purity without me but enjoy it within me which while I looked first on commands and then on promises I could not attain to it but when I beheld first promises and then commands novv I savv an attaining to the Lavv of righteousness though not in or by my self yet in and by another novv I looked on the Lavv and legall precepts vvith an Evangelicall eye vvhereas before the light of the spirit cam● I turned Gospel into Lavv but novv appeared a harmony betvveen both a Lavv within me not making void that vvithout me but novv vvas given me a help meet in behold●ng morall precepts in Evangelicall arms Sinai's voice in Sions breast novv frovvns are gone and similes are come thunder is fallen and the still voice is risen death under life in the top which crown sin nor Satan can never deprive Saints of for Saints are not under legall precepts but under Gospel commands and in this sense they are dead to the Law by the life or Christ in them And for this tenent of truth I passed under the name of Aninomian but praised be the Lord
I will raise thee up and thou shalt live in my sight and with a full perswasion that I should recover but I said Lord this Scripture holds out my resurrection or the restoring of the Jews I was answered it was to manifest my recovery but this departed from me and the glory of God shined exceeding bright and through the sweet odour of the savour of the spirit which Scripture compares to ointment which mightily drew out my love to my Saviour and to the Saints debasing and loathing my self and my love was drawn out to the greatest persecutors of our times I could have lain under their feet to have done them good and many Scriptures were presented and a three-fold interpretation given on them Scriptures never appeared so sweet to me as they did then and as many as the spirit brings to my remembrance I shall relate Further on the Lords day after so indeed it was to me a Lords day in the fore-noon as I lay in the strength of the fever burning very much within but without like a clod and my stomack being shut up not able to take the creatures nor to hear them spoken of my stomack was so weak that all that fortnight I lay and took nothing but small beer a little juice of cherries or conserve of currants I took a little sometimes for cooling of me I did so burn in my throat and stomack I remained thus like a dead carcase in respect of bodily strength but filled with the spirit and as I lay on the said Lords day this Scripture came in with a very great strength in the middest of Divine contemplation it was spoken this second time after two daies I will revive thee then I was drawn forth to ask of God his mind to his hand-maid from that Scripture and my request was thus answered one day with me saith the Lord is as a thousand and a thousand as one day but then I said Lord reveal the meaning of two daies and it was presently given in the two da●es are two weeks after two weeks I will recover thee a perswasion came in with great confidence in believing that at that season God unloosed the bands of my spirit he would unloose the weakness of my body though contrary to reason it was even that night two weeks that my soul was set at liberty that my body should be healed and God spake thus to me did I not tell thee I would work a wonder in Israel and did I not say unto thee if thou wouldst believe thou shalt see the glory of thy God these Scripture languages were spoken to me in the spirit encouraging me to believe though the body should grow weaker as it did afterward and after the second appearing of God I desired rather to be out of the body then in it and when I breathed forth to God how I should live in the body it was answered me to the glory of thy God is not my grace sufficient for thee and art thou afraid to live in the body for fear of the strength of corruptions Sin shall not have dominion over thee for thou art not under the Law but under Grace and through the strength of thy Saviour thou shalt be able to conquer all thy enemies and get the victory over the greatest Giant-corruption and temptation therefore be not faithless but believing it is for my glory thy recovery then I said Lord do with me what thou wilt if thou beest glorified in it whatsoever thy servant suffers it matters not when the Lord told me of that glory he would have in my recovery my spirit was satisfied in urging it to God any more to take me out of the body Now I looked for a further unfolding of God in this thing now I knew it should be further sealed to me but I knew not the time when God would seal it to me so that when my friends desired me to settle things concerning outward affairs nothing but death being expected and feared by them and to my own sence and feeling and yet believed otherwise and I desired my friends to wait a while for I told them I believed a recovery and ● told them upon what grounds but I bid them be silent for if God had a purpose to take me hence he would reveal it to me but I told them surely I should be raised here by a mighty power for I knew it must be a great power to raise up one so dead in the body that could not rise out of my bed all that fortnight but as five lifted me out one night and I was so extream earthy even as lead that they had much ado to lift me into bed again and I slept not but talked night and day the pourings forth of the spirit was such when I did slumber and that was but little but then I felt my pain and weakness very much now the greatest extremity did not affright me though sometimes my bones hath been shaken in my flesh my joints unloosed and sometimes great pains as if my bones had been pulled asunder such torture hath seized upon me and sick fits that the parties which watched by me hath bowed me double to keep breath in me when I have been cold and my breath cold within me and to sence a breathing out my last breath so that my friend that watched with me desired to call other friends but I intreated her to wait much ado I had to speak yet at that instant God told me my breath should be given me and the vitals of my spirits restored that were sinking the Lord gave me faith to believe and I found at that time the power of the most high And the next day about the same hour I had an extream fit of shaking to the amazement of those that stood by and I desired a friend to raise me up in the bed and as she held me she askt me why I shook so I told her the earthly Tabernacle must be shaken and God would lay it lower before he restored it that so his power may be made manifest which he spake of at the beginning of my weakness and this extremity came on me after the second perswasion given me by my God from that Scripture spoken of which came to me on the first day of the week On the third day of the week the Lord sent me Mr. Greenhil Minister of Gods word who assoon as I beheld I could not but say behold the man of God such joy was in my spirits which I could not but utter forth when I saw the Saints I was mightily filled with rejoycing and after I had declared those Revelations given into my spirit to this Minister of God and other Saints that were then by and the Spirit came with such a mighty gale upon me that though I desired to be slow to speak and swift to hear yet then I could not when they desired me to tel them of the distemper of my body when I