heaven_n upon_o earth_n or_o good_a news_n for_o repent_v sinner_n be_v a_o account_n of_o the_o remarkable_a experience_n and_o evidence_n for_o eternal_a life_n of_o many_o eminent_a christian_n in_o several_a declaration_n make_v by_o they_o upon_o solemn_a occasion_n display_v the_o exceed_a riches_n of_o the_o free_a grace_n and_o love_n of_o god_n in_o support_v they_o under_o violent_a temptation_n and_o at_o length_n fill_v their_o soul_n with_o divine_a consolation_n approve_a of_o as_o very_o necessary_a for_o comfort_v poor_a doubt_v believer_n by_o william_n dyer_n min._n of_o the_o gospel_n come_v and_o hear_v all_o you_o that_o fear_v god_n and_o i_o will_v declare_v what_o he_o have_v do_v for_o my_o soul_n psalm_n 66.17_o london_n print_v for_o thomas_n and_o nath._n crouch_n jun._n at_o the_o bell_n in_o the_o poultry_n near_o cheapside_n 1697._o to_o the_o reader_n i_o be_o very_o sensible_a that_o discourse_n of_o conversion_n in_o this_o age_n be_v much_o slight_v and_o deride_v by_o some_o kind_n of_o man_n that_o make_v high_a pretence_n to_o learning_n and_o knowledge_n who_o tell_v we_o that_o this_o talk_n of_o conversion_n be_v sitter_n for_o pagan_n and_o infidel_n to_o hear_v than_o christian_n and_o protestant_n but_o as_o some_o people_n speak_v against_o learning_n that_o have_v none_o themselves_o so_o such_o person_n may_v be_v think_v to_o inveigh_v against_o conversion_n and_o the_o spirit_n of_o god_n because_o they_o never_o experience_v the_o effect_n of_o either_o of_o they_o in_o themselves_o for_o certain_o i._o it_o be_v not_o the_o take_n on_o we_o the_o profession_n of_o christianity_n that_o can_v save_v our_o soul_n or_o make_v we_o happy_a forever_o if_o to_o cease_v to_o be_v jew_n or_o pagan_n and_o to_o put_v on_o the_o christian_a profession_n be_v sufficient_a than_o the_o christian_n of_o sardis_n and_o laodicea_n who_o have_v a_o name_n to_o live_v will_v never_o have_v be_v condemn_v by_o our_o bless_a lord_n and_o threaten_v to_o be_v spew_v out_o rev._n 3.1,16_o be_v there_o not_o many_o that_o name_n the_o name_n of_o jesus_n christ_n that_o yet_o depart_v not_o from_o iniquity_n and_o profess_v they_o know_v god_n but_o in_o work_n deny_v he_o and_o will_v god_n receive_v these_o for_o true_a convert_v because_o they_o be_v turn_v to_o the_o christian_a religion_n ii_o it_o be_v not_o be_v baptise_a into_o the_o christian_a faith_n nor_o be_v wash_v in_o the_o laver_n of_o regeneration_n that_o can_v denominate_v a_o man_n a_o real_a and_o sincere_a christian_a many_o take_v the_o press_n money_n and_o wear_v the_o livery_n of_o christ_n that_o yet_o never_o stand_v to_o their_o colour_n nor_o follow_v their_o leader_n ananias_n and_o saphira_n and_o simon_n magus_n be_v baptize_v as_o well_o as_o the_o rest_n how_o fond_o then_o do_v many_o man_n mistake_v deceive_v and_o be_v deceive_v dream_v that_o the_o effectual_a grace_n of_o god_n be_v necessary_o join_v to_o the_o outward_a administration_n of_o baptism_n and_o that_o be_v convert_v and_o regenerate_v already_o when_o baptise_a they_o need_v no_o more_o but_o if_o this_o be_v so_o than_o all_o that_o be_v baptize_v in_o their_o infancy_n must_v necessary_o be_v save_v because_o the_o promise_n of_o pardon_n and_o salvation_n be_v make_v to_o conversion_n and_o regeneration_n and_o we_o need_v look_v no_o further_o to_o see_v our_o name_n write_v in_o heaven_n but_o to_o search_v the_o register_n and_o see_v whether_o we_o be_v baptize_v and_o the_o certificate_n of_o our_o baptism_n will_v be_v the_o fair_a evidence_n for_o heaven_n and_o we_o need_v only_o to_o cry_v god_n mercy_n and_o be_v absolve_v by_o the_o minister_n at_o our_o death_n and_o we_o 〈◊〉_d inherit_v the_o kingdom_n of_o god_n but_o let_v i_o tell_v you_o from_o the_o live_a god_n that_o whatever_o benefit_n you_o receive_v by_o baptism_n yet_o if_o when_o you_o come_v to_o year_n you_o be_v unholy_a unclean_a malicious_a covetous_a a_o scoffer_n or_o the_o like_a you_o can_v be_v save_v except_o you_o be_v renew_v again_o by_o repentance_n and_o a_o through_o and_o powerful_a change_n of_o your_o heart_n and_o life_n iii_o it_o be_v not_o moral_a righteousness_n that_o will_v evidence_n we_o to_o be_v christian_n we_o must_v exceed_v the_o scribe_n and_o pharisee_n and_o though_o the_o bless_a apostle_n paul_n before_o his_o conversion_n say_v that_o he_o be_v touch_v the_o righteousness_n of_o the_o law_n blameless_a phil._n 3._o so_o that_o none_o can_v charge_v he_o with_o the_o least_o immorality_n and_o though_o the_o self_n justify_v pharisee_n can_v say_v i_o be_o no_o extortioner_n adulterer_n unjust_a etc._n etc._n luke_n 18.11_o yet_o this_o be_v not_o sufficient_a thou_o must_v have_v something_o more_o than_o all_o this_o to_o show_v or_o else_o god_n will_v not_o justify_v thou_o i_o condemn_v not_o morality_n but_o we_o be_v not_o to_o rest_v there_o piety_n include_v morality_n as_o christianity_n do_v humanity_n and_o grace_n include_v reason_n but_o we_o must_v not_o divide_v the_o two_o table_n iv_o external_n conformity_n to_o the_o rule_n of_o piety_n be_v not_o enough_o to_o make_v we_o true_a christian_n many_o have_v a_o form_n of_o godliness_n without_o the_o power_n they_o may_v pray_v long_o fast_o often_o hear_v glad_o and_o be_v very_o forward_o in_o the_o service_n of_o god_n though_o costly_a and_o expensive_a and_o yet_o be_v stranger_n to_o christianity_n and_o the_o divine_a life_n it_o will_v not_o be_v enough_o for_o they_o to_o plead_v at_o the_o great_a day_n of_o account_n that_o thâ—_n keep_v their_o church_n say_v their_o prayer_n receive_v the_o sacrament_n constant_o give_v alm_n or_o the_o like_a for_o there_o be_v no_o outward_a service_n but_o a_o hypocrite_n may_v perform_v it_o even_o to_o the_o give_v all_o his_o good_n to_o the_o poor_a and_o his_o body_n to_o be_v burn_v 1_o cor._n 13.3_o v._o a_o seem_v conformity_n to_o the_o will_n of_o god_n occasion_v either_o by_o the_o restraint_n of_o humane_a law_n education_n affliction_n or_o the_o like_a can_v never_o give_v we_o assurance_n of_o eternal_a happiness_n it_o be_v too_o common_a and_o easy_a to_o mistake_v education_n for_o the_o grace_n of_o god_n but_o if_o this_o be_v true_a who_o be_v a_o better_a man_n than_o jehoash_n who_o while_o his_o uncle_n live_v be_v very_o forward_o in_o god_n service_n and_o call_v upon_o he_o to_o repair_v the_o house_n of_o the_o lord_n 2_o king_n 12.2,7_o yet_o there_o be_v nothing_o but_o good_a education_n all_o this_o while_n for_o when_o his_o good_a tutor_n be_v take_v out_o of_o the_o way_n he_o appear_v to_o have_v be_v only_o chain_v up_o and_o present_o fall_v to_o idolatry_n so_o in_o case_n of_o humane_a law_n and_o affliction_n though_o man_n may_v seem_v very_o conformable_a while_o they_o be_v restrain_v by_o they_o yet_o that_o be_v remove_v many_o throw_n of_o all_o and_o commit_v iniquity_n with_o groodiness_n have_v brief_o declare_v what_o true_a christianity_n be_v not_o i_o shall_v in_o short_a discover_v what_o it_o be_v conversion_n or_o true_a religion_n consist_v in_o the_o through_o change_n both_o of_o the_o heart_n and_o life_n by_o the_o spirit_n of_o god_n through_o the_o merit_n and_o intercession_n of_o jesus_n christ_n where_o this_o be_v in_o truth_n it_o go_v throughout_o all_o the_o power_n principle_n and_o practice_n of_o a_o man_n his_o mind_n be_v change_v and_o the_o scale_n of_o his_o natural_a ignorance_n fall_v off_o so_o that_o god_n and_o his_o glory_n weigh_v down_o all_o carnal_a and_o worldly_a interest_n and_o he_o be_v turn_v from_o darkness_n to_o light_n he_o that_o think_v former_o there_o be_v little_o hurt_v in_o sin_n now_o come_v to_o see_v it_o to_o be_v the_o chief_a of_o evil_n heretofore_o he_o see_v no_o form_n nor_o comeliness_n in_o his_o holy_a redeemer_n that_o he_o shall_v desire_v he_o but_o now_o he_o find_v he_o to_o be_v the_o hide_a treasure_n and_o the_o pearl_n of_o price_n for_o which_o he_o be_v willing_a to_o part_v with_o all_o to_o purchase_v it_o now_o god_n be_v all_o to_o he_o and_o he_o value_v his_o favour_n and_o the_o light_n of_o his_o countenance_n above_o all_o the_o good_a that_o he_o former_o inquire_v after_o and_o set_v his_o heart_n upon_o let_v the_o world_n now_o present_v herself_o in_o all_o the_o glory_n of_o her_o kingdom_n yet_o his_o soul_n will_v prefer_v a_o naked_a a_o crucify_a a_o persecute_a christ_n before_o she_o and_o he_o will_v cry_v out_o the_o lord_n be_v my_o portion_n say_v my_o soul_n who_o have_v i_o in_o heaven_n but_o thou_o and_o there_o be_v none_o upon_o earth_n that_o i_o desire_v beside_o thou_o god_n be_v the_o strength_n of_o my_o heart_n and_o my_o portion_n for_o ever_o he_o have_v rather_o be_v
of_o the_o gate_n from_o one_o post_n to_o the_o other_o with_o a_o broad_a blade_n most_o keen_a and_o cruel_a at_o which_o sad_a sight_n be_v almost_o distract_v with_o fear_n i_o shriek_v out_o yet_o have_v not_o the_o least_o power_n to_o stop_v but_o be_v forcible_o carry_v towards_o it_o so_o that_o the_o edge_n of_o the_o threaten_a blade_n meet_v with_o my_o body_n it_o seem_v to_o â—e_v impossible_a that_o i_o shall_v escape_v death_n and_o i_o make_v no_o other_o account_n but_o to_o be_v quite_o off_o and_o part_v asunder_o but_o afterward_o be_v hurry_v through_o with_o that_o irresistible_a force_n i_o have_v strength_n to_o stay_v a_o little_a beyond_o it_o and_o to_o contemplate_v the_o desperate_a peril_n that_o i_o be_v in_o i_o stand_v as_o one_o amaze_v and_o scarce_o know_v whether_o i_o be_v alive_a or_o dead_a yea_o i_o can_v hardly_o believe_v myself_o to_o be_v any_o thing_n but_o a_o dead_a man_n or_o at_o least_o mortal_o and_o deadly_o wound_v if_o not_o woeful_o and_o deplorable_o cut_v in_o twain_o oh_o how_o i_o stand_v tremble_v and_o turmoil_v in_o my_o thought_n until_o after_o some_o time_n the_o vital_a blood_n which_o be_v retire_v for_o the_o heart_n defence_n begin_v to_o disperse_v and_o circulate_v in_o its_o former_a course_n and_o then_o i_o look_v about_o and_o turn_v to_o the_o gate_n way_n but_o the_o appearance_n be_v pass_v away_o the_o sword_n go_v and_o vanishâ—_n whilst_o i_o be_v leave_v alone_o the_o rest_n run_v away_o in_o a_o labarynth_n of_o fear_n grief_n and_o doubt_n free_a from_o any_o wound_n without_o but_o deep_o and_o woeful_o wound_v within_o and_o never_o since_o to_o the_o praise_n of_o god_n grace_n as_o i_o know_v of_o have_v i_o make_v such_o vain_a and_o irreverent_a meâ—ntion_n of_o the_o name_n of_o the_o lord_n but_o good_a god_n what_o be_v thy_o will_n herein_o thou_o who_o be_v not_o tie_v to_o mean_n or_o order_n best_o ordere_v and_o dispose_v of_o all_o thing_n for_o thy_o own_o design_n and_o glory_n and_o so_o this_o be_v i_o be_o sure_a but_o what_o it_o be_v i_o know_v not_o yet_o it_o leave_v a_o last_a impression_n upon_o i_o and_o the_o sear_n be_v still_o to_o be_v be_v see_v in_o my_o heart_n though_o the_o wound_n be_v heal_v but_o alas_o how_o long_o and_o lamentable_o do_v i_o lie_v afflict_v and_o in_o continual_a fear_n after_o this_o every_o thunder_n and_o lightning_n i_o look_v upon_o as_o fatal_a to_o i_o and_o send_v to_o destroy_v i_o and_o then_o i_o will_v fall_v to_o my_o prayer_n and_o say_v my_o creed_n and_o commandment_n and_o to_o my_o sermon_n as_o fast_o as_o i_o can_v that_o i_o may_v be_v find_v well_o do_v at_o least_o if_o not_o as_o a_o charm_n to_o preserve_v i_o or_o a_o challenge_v to_o god_n by_o virtue_n of_o they_o to_o keep_v and_o defend_v i_o and_o i_o remember_v it_o be_v a_o great_a comfort_n to_o i_o to_o confider_v that_o other_o do_v not_o do_v as_o i_o do_v but_o that_o they_o altogether_o flight_v holiness_n prayer_n etc._n etc._n and_o live_v wicked_o and_o carnal_o in_o drunkeness_n disobedience_n sabbath-breaking_a and_o other_o sin_n every_o day_n this_o i_o be_v so_o far_o from_o grieve_v at_o and_o weep_v over_o that_o i_o in_o my_o heart_n rejoice_v in_o it_o as_o have_v more_o hope_n and_o fancy_v myself_o to_o be_v in_o a_o better_a condition_n than_o they_o and_o therefore_o shall_v have_v more_o favour_n from_o the_o hand_n of_o god_n but_o all_o this_o while_n like_o a_o israelite_n in_o egypt_n i_o work_v for_o life_n and_o my_o service_n be_v my_o saviour_n and_o i_o will_v often_o take_v occasion_n to_o discourse_n with_o my_o brother_n sister_n and_o schoolfellow_n about_o heaven_n and_o hell_n and_o what_o a_o hard_a thing_n it_o be_v to_o be_v save_v be_v at_o malden_n in_o essex_n some_o time_n after_o i_o have_v a_o certain_a dream_n which_o seem_v afterward_o fulfy_v it_o be_v about_o the_o time_n when_o the_o spaniard_n and_o hollander_n have_v a_o sea_n fight_v in_o the_o down_n which_o i_o hear_v some_o talk_n of_o it_o fill_v i_o with_o fear_n and_o the_o follow_a night_n i_o dream_v that_o i_o see_v fire_n rain_v or_o rather_o pour_v down_o round_o about_o and_o look_v where_o i_o be_v i_o think_v myself_o to_o be_v without_o the_o coach_n yard_n gate_n of_o my_o father_n house_n i_o be_v much_o affright_v to_o see_v nothing_o out_o fire_n on_o every_o side_n of_o i_o and_o look_v upward_o and_o about_o i_o pray_v earnest_o for_o deliverance_n none_o come_v nigh_o i_o by_o a_o good_a space_n though_o flame_v in_o all_o place_n else_o so_o that_o i_o can_v see_v none_o exempt_v wherefore_o be_v afflict_v for_o my_o father_n and_o our_o family_n i_o fall_v on_o my_o knee_n to_o ask_v mercy_n for_o they_o and_o continue_v pray_v a_o long_a while_n before_o i_o can_v be_v hear_v but_o at_o last_o i_o think_v i_o be_v bid_v to_o arise_v and_o look_v and_o then_o the_o fire_n seem_v not_o to_o fall_v so_o fast_o on_o my_o father_n house_n as_o before_o but_o abate_v by_o little_a and_o little_a till_o i_o awake_v now_o though_o this_o dream_n seize_v much_o upon_o my_o spirit_n for_o the_o present_a yet_o i_o account_v it_o only_o a_o fancy_n till_o about_o six_o year_n after_o meeting_n with_o dr._n draiton_n in_o the_o isle_n of_o ely_n and_o repeat_v it_o to_o he_o he_o declare_v to_o i_o that_o for_o several_a reason_n which_o he_o give_v this_o must_v be_v more_o than_o a_o mere_a dream_n or_o work_n of_o fancy_n and_o that_o something_o will_v happen_v which_o this_o do_v presignisie_n instance_v in_o some_o of_o the_o like_a kind_n which_o himself_o his_o wife_n and_o other_o have_v meet_v with_o as_o warning_n and_o prediction_n and_o therefore_o he_o wish_v i_o by_o no_o mean_n to_o slight_v or_o contemn_v it_o because_o he_o be_v confident_a it_o do_v presage_v some_o fiery_a and_o angry_a dispensation_n upon_o our_o family_n and_o that_o my_o father_n and_o the_o rest_n will_v fall_v undersome_a trouble_n by_o the_o time_n or_o otherwise_o and_o myself_o shall_v be_v free_a and_o at_o liberty_n to_o pray_v for_o they_o and_o that_o by_o degree_n they_o shall_v be_v bring_v out_o and_o the_o fire_n abate_v this_o interpretation_n which_o he_o give_v more_o full_o be_v for_o the_o most_o part_n verify_v some_o year_n after_o but_o all_o this_o while_n i_o be_v labour_v for_o heaven_n in_o a_o exceed_a formal_a way_n and_o do_v much_o covet_v to_o know_v the_o thing_n of_o god_n and_o therefore_o often_o wish_v that_o i_o be_v a_o minister_n such_o a_o one_o as_o mr._n fenner_n mr._n martial_n mr._n hooker_n my_o father_n or_o some_o other_o eminent_a preacher_n that_o so_o i_o may_v attain_v to_o their_o knowledge_n and_o then_o i_o think_v i_o shall_v do_v more_o abundant_a service_n for_o god_n as_o if_o the_o lord_n be_v behold_v to_o i_o for_o my_o obedience_n and_o shall_v the_o more_o easy_o and_o sure_o obtain_v salvation_n thus_o i_o poor_a creature_n continue_v for_o several_a year_n together_o keep_v many_o fast_a day_n by_o myself_o hear_v read_v sing_v psalm_n meditate_a use_v soliloquy_n and_o pray_v many_o time_n a_o day_n and_o what_o not_o and_o yet_o at_o last_o sink_v into_o the_o depth_n of_o despair_n what_o by_o the_o often_o thought_n of_o hell_n in_o read_v drexelius_n upon_o eternity_n and_o then_o think_v of_o the_o endless_a easeless_a and_o remediless_a torment_n of_o the_o damn_a what_o by_o frequent_a fright_v as_o before_o and_o what_o by_o my_o father_n once_o preach_v on_o the_o parallel_n of_o the_o fool_n in_o the_o gospel_n luke_n 10.20_o thou_o fool_n this_o night_n will_v i_o take_v away_o thy_o soul_n than_o who_o shall_v these_o thing_n be_v that_o thou_o have_v provide_v from_o whence_o he_o discover_v the_o unaccountable_a folly_n of_o man_n to_o lay_v up_o the_o trifle_n of_o this_o world_n and_o forget_v heaven_n that_o eternal_a happiness_n be_v not_o to_o be_v obtain_v upon_o a_o down_o bed_n nor_o without_o much_o pain_n and_o care_n since_o our_o bless_a lord_n tell_v we_o that_o many_o strive_v hard_a to_o enter_v into_o the_o kingdom_n of_o heaven_n and_o shall_v not_o be_v able_a and_o that_o except_o our_o righteousness_n exceed_v the_o righteousness_n of_o the_o scribe_n and_o pharisee_n we_o shall_v in_o no_o case_n enter_v into_o the_o kingdom_n of_o heaven_n matth._n 5.20_o what_o with_o these_o and_o other_o thing_n i_o be_v almost_o throw_v into_o the_o bottomless_a abyss_n of_o desperation_n i_o take_v the_o bible_n to_o look_v these_o scripture_n and_o read_v they_o over_o and_o over_o again_o but_o the_o more_o i_o read_v the_o more_o i_o be_v fill_v with_o horror_n