that he is nor oftentimes the Creature But some four-footed Beast or feather'd Fowl But could I fasten but a slumber on him Which must be the first entrance to my work Anth. Have you concluded yet your barbarous councel If not take my advice with ye call the King The King with whose authority you scorn me Let him but hear for you will never tell him From my own lips how willingly I 'l give My voice unto his marriage and I 'm sure He 'l set me free at least by death Eauf. Alas What King what freedome would you have You are our King and shall command your freedom And all our lives would you but sleep a while Anth. Sleep make no doubt of that look I can sleep With as much ease as one bound in a Cart Driving to execution But do you hear My vow was not to sleep nor eat untill I had perform'd a work which I shall never Never accomplish now my vow is broken For they by witchcraft charm'd me into sleep And tempted me with meat at unawares Before my sleep-drown'd senses were collected And put me on these unknown garments here With an hayl Master so betray'd me into This irksome folly or this foolish thraldome Theod. 'T was a rash vow and so well broke you now Shall be releas'd unbind him at my peril These rigorous courses have done hurt upon him We have provided otherwise to please you For we have call'd Theodrick home again Your Favourite whose absence was a grief to you Nay more because 't is thought your languishing love Bred your distemper we have taken care For hastning of your marriage your fair Queen Is sent for and at hand to ease your sorrow Anth. My Favourite and my Queen leave these abuses My hands and feet are now at liberty Strikes and kicks Theod. So is our duty and if your Majesty Will tread our due allegiance into dust We are prepar'd to suffer Anth. Would to heaven I could unfold this mystery Eauf. See my Lord Theodrick is come Ent. Theodrick Theodr. Most gracious Sir That I have suffred under your displeasure In being barr'd your presence which no lesse Then the all cheering Sun gave life to me Was not so much my grief as not to know What my transgression was and let me now Implore your mercy so far as to name it Which if I cannot cleer me of I 'l lose my life and willingly Anth. If I could think this serious 't were enough Almost to turn my sorrows into laughter Theodr. O turn not from me royal Sir t' augment Your Highnesse displeasure but in case you will not Be pleas'd to name my trespasse give me leave To speak what I suppose has troubled you And caus'd me causelesly to be suspended Enter Genius whispering him Anth. I feel a secret instigation in me I hope by some good Angel that inclines me At last to yield a little to these men What wouldst thou say Theodr. My Lords and all forbear The presence never fear all shall be well Theodw. Heaven grant it Eauf. Was not this my policy To send for him more was it not my wit To fashion letters as with 's own hand To fetch the Queen you 'l see more at her coming Exeunt all but Theodrick Anthy Theodr. May 't please you now but to review these Pictures Anth. Good memory help me this is of the Queen The cruel Queen that banish'd my good Father And this the lively Image of my Sister Theodr. Now may it please your grace to recollect How when I told you this was my fair Mistresse Your passion first siez'd on you and pardon Royal Sir If I have since conjectured my transgression Was meerly this that I lov'd one so fair I dare not yet say fairer then your choice But freely thus to expiate my trespasse As I resign the Picture I give up All interest in her person never more Beyond your free consent to see that Beauty Anth. I have found all the error and am taught By hidden inspiration to make use on 't Genius shall whispers him Give me fresh rayment I 'l take all upon me Their Crown if they will give it yet me thinks This is so like a dream where else can be King Osriick all this while that he comes not To throw me out of this usurped right Strange and new thoughts possesse me Gen. whispers Now I call To mind the vision that I had of being Call'd to the Throne of the west Saxons Kings It must be by this Queen whom how to love I cannot find My Genius promps me yes I hear it now as by an Angel spoke And that my vow was rashly made well broke I am confirm'd come she I am for her puts on Hat Feather and Cloke ex Genius Well said Theodrick Theodrick is his name How do I look Theodrick Theodr. I can find But little change which I allow to sicknesse Anth. Well said thou never flatterest Enter Jeffrey winding an Horn. Jeff. News neam King news news News that will make thee well beest thou never so sick News that beest thou never so well will make thee sick News that will make thee mad beest thou never so tame News that beest thou never so mad will make thee tame Anth. What 's thy news Jeff. A wife a wife a wife can do all this The Queen is come and all my Cousin Lords Are gone to fetch her in in pompe Oh ho Knight me oh Knight me quickly for my news Theodr. Away you fool Jeff. Away you Favourite Hinder me not unlesse I prophesie Kings Fools and Favourites never shall agree And many years after we are in our graves Fools shall be Knights and Favourites shall be known From black Sheep I prophesie Oh ho she comes she comes now neam King Bear up stiff before and meet her Here 's a day And a night towards indeed Oh ho the house Begins to reel already and all our brains turn Round oh ho. Enter Vshers bare Kelriick and Elkwin Theodwald and Eaufride a Cardinal the Queen two Ladies bearing up her Train Followers the Queen Bertha kneels Anthynus as King takes her up kisses her they confer the four Lords salute and confer Theodwald and Eaufride give their supposed Kings hand to the Cardinal Kelriick and Elkwin give their Queens hand to the Cardinal the Cardinal joyns their hands Anthynus and Bertha kisse all the Lords embrace the Exeunt in state as before Jeff. Oh what a night will here be what a night will here be What a beast am I that I have not at least half A score of my wholesome Countrey Lasses with child now That forty weeks hence the Queen might have her Choice of Nurses there had been a thriving way to raise My fortunes indeed Oh what a night will here be Exit ACT. V. SCEN. I. Enter Mildred Offa. Mild HElp help oh help Off. Your cries will be in vain 'T is not in the power of any flesh but yours To allay or to prevent
THE Royall Exchange A COMEDY Acted with general Applause at the BLACK-FRIERS BY HIS Majesties SERVANTS Written by Mr. Richard Brome Regia res amor est LONDON Printed for Henry Brome at the Gun in Ivie-lane 1661. The Stationer to the Readers Gentlemen and Ladies THis short account I thought fit to give you of this Poem that it came to my hands among other things of this nature written and left by Mr. Rich. Brome a person whose excellency in Comical wit has been sufficiently proved and needs not my partial and weak commendation There are published already of his Playes the Northern Lass the Antipodes the Sparagus-garden the Merry Beggers the Lancashire Witches besides the 5. Playes lately published in a Volume The good acceptance of all which encourages me to publish this being no way inferior to the rest but when 't was written or where acted I know not Your kinde entertainment of this will enable me to make known to the World divers more of the same Authors works of this kind which have not yet seen light for my ayme is prodesse delectare by delighting thee to profit my self H. B. Farewel The Queens Exchange The Persons in the Play OSriick King of Northumbria Theodrick his Favourite and Embassador Ethelswick his Substitute Theodwald Eaufride Alfride Edelbert Lords of his Council A Physition Jeffrey the Kings fool 4. Clowns BErtha Queen of West Saxons Segebert Alberto two banished Lords Anthynus Offa Segeberts Sons Mildred Segeberts daughter Osriicks Queen Arnold an old servant of Offa. Kelrick Elkwine Elfride three sycophant Lords Hermit and his Servant Keeper of Prison Edith Mildreds Nurse A Carpenter A Mason A Smith three Thieves Scene England Prolouge to the Queens Exchange THe writer of this Play who ever uses To usher with his modesty the Muses Unto the Stage He that scarce ever durst Of Poets rank himself above the worst Though most that he has writ has past the rest And found good approbation of the best He as he never knew to bow he saies As litttle fears the fortune of his Playes He yields their right to us and we submit All that they are in learning or in wit To your fair censure All is then but thâ—… As you approve they are good or bad to us And all by way of favour we can crave Is that you not destroy where you may save The QUEENES Exchange ACT. I. SCEN. I. Enter Celerick Elkwin Segebert Bertha and Attendants Hoboyes Bart. SInce it has pleasd the highest Power to place me His substitute in Regal Soveraignty Over this Kingdom by the generall vote Of you my loyall Lords and loving Subjects Though grounded on my right of due Succession Being immediate heir and only child Of your late much deplored King my Father I am in a most reverend duty bound Unto that Power above me and a wel Befitting care towards you my faithfull people To rule and govern so at least so neere As by all possibility I may That I may shun Heavens anger and your grief Which that I may at our last consultation The better to passe through my weighty charge I gave you to consider of the Proposition Is made to me by the Northumbrian King Of marriage not only to enable me In my government but therby to strengthen This Kingdom in succeeding times by a line Of lawfull Successors I gave you all My strong most unanswerable reasons To which you seemd contented all but one Who with the rest by this I hope is satistisfied 'T is you Lord Segebert you it is I mean Does it appear to you yet reasonable That I be matcht to the Northumbrian King I have with patience waited a whole moneth For you to rectifie your scrupulous judgement Whereby it might comply with these no way Inferiour to your self but are your Peers As well in their kown wisdom as my favour Seg. Thus low unto your sacred Majesty I here devote my self and thus I meet With equal love th' embraces of these Lords I le joyn grow one body and one voice With them in all may adde unto your Honour And your dear Kingdoms good But pardon me My soverain Queen and I beseech you my Lords To weigh with your known wisdom the great danger This match may bring unto the Crown and Country T is true the King Osriick as wel in person As in his dignity may be thought fit To be endow'd with all you seem to yeild him But what becomes of all the wholsome Laws Customs and all the nerves of Government Your no less prudent than Majestick Father With power policy enricht this Land with And made the Saxons happy and your self A Queen of so great eminence Must all With so much Majestie and matchlesse beauty Be now subjected to a strangers foot And trod into disorder All your wealth Your state your laws your subjects and the hope Of flourishing future fortunes which your Father By his continual care and teadious study Gave as a Legacy unto this Kingdom Must all be altered or quite subverted And all by a wilful gift unto a stranger Bart. Peace stop his mouth Unreaverend old man How darst thou thus oppose thy Soveraignes will So well approvd by all thy fellow Peers Of which the meanest equals thee in judgement Seg. Do you approve their judgments Madam which Are grounded on your will I may not do 't Only I pray that you may understand But not unto your loss the difference Betwixt smooth flattery and honest judgements Bert. Do you hear this my Lords Celr My Lord Segebert Though you except against this King He may hereafter thank you in your kind Seg. Mean time I thank you for your prophesie Cel. You cannot but allow succession is The life of Kingdoms if so you cannot But wish the Queen which Heaven grant speedily An happy husband Bert. I thank you good my Lord. Elk. And if an husband why not him she affects Can it befit a Subject to controle The affection of his Princesse Heaven forbid Seg. This is â—ar taking Musick Elk. Or suppose You might controle it whom in your great wisdom Would you allot the Queen Seg I see your aym And know when I have said all that I dare What censure I must undergoe And thus I le meet it boldly you are sycophants all And doe provide but for your selves though all The Kingdom perish for 't May the justice That follows flattery overtake you for 't Seg. Take hence the mad man Colr. We are sorry for you Elk. And wish the troublesome spirit were out of you That so distracts your reason Elf. We have known you Speak and answer to the purpose Seg. Your question to no purpose Sir was this Whom my great wisdom would allot the Queen You are not worth my answer But my Soveraigne I do implore your gracious attention To these few words Celr. Lesse sense Elf. No matter Elk. Silence Speak your few words the Queen can give you hearing Seg. I wish
He lodges it perpetually on his bosome Elkw. We are dunces to him Emb Here just here And 't please your Majesty o' the hearts side shrugs Bert. Indeed I am pleas'd I 'l stay you but to night To morrow you shall hasten towards the King And for your speed wear this Emb. Most gracious Queen kisses her hand Exeunt Omnes SCEN. II. Enter Segebert Apthynus Offa Mildred Seg. 'T is the Queens pleasure children I must bear it Off. To Banishment good heaven forbid And Heaven I hope will not yet suffer it Seg. Whilst we expect the best from Heavens high will It suffers Princes to reward us ill Yet can I think it shakes an angry hand Over my head for some misdeed of mine Which I have unrepented let go by It must be something sure was pleasure to me What in the World has most delighted me To love my King and Country Neighbours Friends And sometimes Enemies I 'l passe o're that I have done well though I do not to boast it To succour and relieve all kind of wretches Poor souls that have half deafned me with Prayers Loud Prayers They 'l misse me now and I Shall have a misse of them too Let that passe What have I done at home since my Wife died No Turtle ever kept a widowhood More strict then I have done Then for my Children Offa. Come you hither Off. My Lord Father Anth. He might have call'd me first I am the Eldest Seg I am sure thou 'lt answer in behal of one Have I not lov'd thee alwayes Off. O dear Sir I am all unworthy to acknowledge half Half of your pious bounties on a Son A wretch so ill deserving as my self Your hand has evermore been open to me Your blessings still more readily have showr'd Upon my head then I had grace to ask them For to my knowledge I ne're ask'd blessing yet With a good will in all my life some would Do Pennance in the Church with lesse perplexity Seg. I thou wast ever an obedient child Next you my Daughter Anth. Then I must be last Seg. How have you found my love Mild Sir far above my duty Seg. Do not weep but speak good child I have not long to stay with yee my three dayes Will scarce afford this hour to bide with you Weeps Mild. Had I no tears nor sobs to interrupt My flattering Tongue but had speech as free As the best Orator that speaks for fee Could or durst I attempt t' express your goodness More then to say 't is more then I can say Seg. 'T is a good maid O Queen thou art too cruel Mild. But honour'd Father grant me yet one Bone Seg. What 's that my Girle Mild. You shall know presently Dries her eyes Pray give me leave to kneel unto the Queen To try what I can do for your repeal 'T were shame we should sit down and lose you thus The Queen affects me well You know she loves me And promis'd once she would deny me nothing Seg. For this thou shalt not trouble her besides You put me well in mind to charge you Daughter Upon my Blessing go no more to Court Shun it I charge thee as thou wouldst my curse If you have lovers there whom they call Servants Do as neat Surgeons do when they have touch'd Loathsome or pestilent Sores wash clean your hands Of all of 'em that are far more infections And hear me daughter Mildred I am told The Nâ—…humbrian Embassador now at Court The great Kings greater Favourite made hot love to you And that he obtained your Picture which he wears More proud of 't then his undeserved Honours Let me now charge you further and observe it Shake off all thoughts of him Upon the match now He and whole Sholes of upstart Braveries Must hither needs attend their King But if Thou marry with him or any amongst them Though the greatest subject that his Master has Thou art divored for ever of my blessing Mild. I will in all obey you Off. I shall look to that Sir Seg. Enough Anthynus Anth. At last yet I am thought on Seg. Now there rests Of all my children but you to resolve me How you have found my love Anth. You ask me last Sir I presume cause you have had me longest To crown their testimony Seg. Yet you seem Anthinus by your leave the least to know me But like a stranger look upon me when These give me due respect Anth. Lesse then due I dare not give you and more were to abuse you Though I do not applaud I must approve You are a right good father Off. Umh. Seg. Yet you speak in this but coldly Off. No no it sounds not well But you are wise Anth. I have observ'd but specially at Court Where flattery is too frequent the great scorn You have ever cast upon it and do fear To come within such danger of reproof Knowing your reason may as well detest it In your own house as in Kings Pallaces And when I hear another my dear Sister Heaven know I mean not you Speak like a flatterer I hold my peace And so come short of doing what I would For fear of over-doing But honour'd Sir When a Son can be found that dares do more For 's Fathers life or honour then my self I 'l forfeit mine inheritance and your blessing So much your love engages me Off. If this were hearty now not hollow Seg. No more Time calls away apace and I am satisfied Since I must undergo the Queens hard censure That it falls not upon me like a curse For wronging Crown or Country Neighbours Friends Or you my dearer children I will take it Not as a punishment but blessing rather To be remov'd from miseries Are like to fall on this unhappy Kingdom And I will think the Queen has done me favour To case me of my cares a thousand wayes To make my rest of life all holidayes Now take my last directions Son Anthynus Anth. Son It is holyday with me to 'T is The first time he call'd me Son these three years Seg. Though you are eldest and my lawful heir And must be Lord at my decease of all My large Possessions Yet it is my will That till my death my Offa have the sway And government of all allowing you That yearly stipen formerly I gave you Let me not hear of any grudge betwixt you And be you both respectful of your Sister And you of them good Girle It is decreed That I shall never see you more Mild. Ay me Cries Seg. Go get thee in I prithe Mildred Go in I say thy brothers shall a little Shew me my way Go in I shall not speak else And I have more to say to them Good now go Mild. O O O. Seg. You will not disobey me Heaven blesse my Girle go and come again Mild. But must I never see you more Seg. Yes child in Heaven and then for evermore Mild. To wait your coming thither I 'l afore Exit
Seg. Thither shall be my first journey But after you shall still hear from me where e're I wander Anth. Not I Sir by your favour Seg. Why I pray Anth. I must be nearer you I kneel for 't Sir And humbly pray I may not be denied To wait on you in Exile Take me with you Off. Do you not find him Seg. This is but your stoutness Though you seem humble unto me against Your brother because I leave the rule to him Anth. Far be it from my thoughts dear Sir consider He has had that rule already divers years Ere since my mother die and been your darling Heaven knows without my grudge while you were pleas'd Off. Heaven knows his thoughts the while alack a day Anth. I never envied him though I have found You have severely over look'd my Actions When you have smil'd on his though but the same I have been still content while I have found my duty firm Seg. You shall along Anth. You have new begotten me Off. Sir Seg. Peace I know thy fear my dearest Boy Off. Does not your blood begin to chil within you Great heirs are overhasty Sir And think their Fathers live too long Pray Sir Take heed of him Though he should act the Parricide abroad our laws acquit him Sâ—g I 'l give my self to Heaven quit thou thy fear I am not worth a life I 'l take him hence That thou mayst be secure from bloody spite I fear him not mischief has spent her selfe And left her sting within me for a charme That quit me from the fear of further harm Go get thee home my blessing and farewell Off. Pray Sir excuse me I cannot speak for laughing aside Seg. And farwel Countrey shed not a tear for me I go to be dissolv'd in tears for thee ACT. II. SCEN. I. Enter Osriick the King Theodrick Theodwald Eaufrid Alfrid Elelbert 2. Lords OSr. Let your dispatches instantly be sent Through all the Kingdom to incite the people As many as are mine or would be thought so To expresse with me their joy for the enjoying Of the so long desired happinesse In this our beautious and magnificent Queen 1. Lor. See that through all the Cities Towns and Villages With solemn Feasts and publique sign of joy They celebrate a day for these glad Tydings 2. Lor. Post every way that the third day from this The general joy may sound and shine through all The Kingdom Attend. That 's with Bells and Bonefires 1. 2. Lor. Goe Ex. Attendants Kin. And now my Lords I must require your care To set down a fit order for our journey Unto this Queen to perfect my worlds blisse I would not fail in the least Article Of state or decency in this Affair Provide so that we may in all appear Worthy th'Atchievement of our fair ambition And let our followers be chosen such Whose inward worth no lesse then outward shew May make us glorious in this expedition Do speedily and effectually good my Lords The time hasts on 1. 2. Lor. Our duty shall prevent it King Methinks the silent Picture seems to say 'T is fit I should anticipate a day Ex. Lords Rather then lose one minute from that light Whose very shadow is so Angel bright Emb. But when your Highness shall behold nay more Shall touch nay more and nearer shall embrace Nay more and nearer yet enfold and handle Nay more and nearest of all enjoy The lively that 's too little heavenly substance Of this poor imaginary which is as short As far inferiour to the life As a weak star-light to the mid day Sun King O do not ravish me with expectation This is a way to make each hour untill I shall enjoy my blisse a tedious night Each night a death Yet can I not desire To shift the Argument off our discourse Did she appear so fair so lovely Emb. Sir Suppose you see a glorious Firmament Bedek'd with heavenly Stars so shines her Court With Ladies might be thought of matchlesse beauty Striking meer humane sight with admiration Imagine now you see break through a Vail Amidst those Stars though heavenly lesser beauties The bright Cynthia in her full of Lustre So this no lesse to be compared Queen Shines above beauty to an humane eye That is not mix'd with powerful Majesty You may behold her your Divinity My King may comprehend what can befit Me only to confesse I do admire King O thou art mine In such a Queen And such a Servant nev'r was King so bless'd But are there in her Court although inferiour To her more Excellent such special Beauties And in my Theodricks apprehension You have made choice of one then Emb. I have seen One so agreeable to my affection Above all the rest I cannot but confesse I strove to be her Servant King Doubtlesse then She was a fair one Theodrick never fear She is thine own my self will be thy Spokesman If she be worthy of thee Emb. For fair Vertue With all the graces which adorn the mind In best opinion she 's unparallel'd By any Subject Lady I must ever Allow Supremacy unto the Queen And for her Person it appears in all Most answerable to her face Of which here is Th' exactest Copy that I could get drawn And without flattery by the Queens own Lymner King Pray let me see 't Indeed it is a sweet one Did he that drew this of the Queen draw that Emb. With the same hand King But not with the same colours Trust me they 're much unlike He wrongs the Queen And merits her displeasure even to death T' advance a Servants beauty 'bove her own Emb. What sayes your Majesty King Keep off a little You stand just in my light And so he does Twixt me and the prime beauty of the world But I 'l be even with him and cause my Picturer To set this Crown upon this head and then Fie what a fancie 's this He will perceive me But now I note this Forehead and this Brow This Eye this Lip le ts fall the other Emb. You have let fall the Queen Sir takes it up King I cry her mercy What a shame it is That I should fall in his discovery Are Courts so fraught with fraud and flattery And can a King that governs such professors No whit dissemble to obscure his passions I must and thus begin to practice it Theodrick didst thou note my contemplation Over these Pictures Emb. I could but perceive Your Highnesse viewing them well And I have learn'd To make no search into my Soveraigns thoughts King Thou art ever modest Thus it was Theodrick Protest it rap't me bove the pitch of Mortals First to consider what an absolute beauty This Queen has in herself but then to gather The circumstances many such as this As thou affirnist inferiour â—ights to her That shine about her rendring her more glorious Lights her above affection to an height That claims her adoration Then marvel not That now when this but in
Effigy Was but plac'd by her By which her Majesty So much the more appear'd I could not hold This Figure of that all to be commanding beauty When my high thoughts were fled up to her presence Now take thy piece of craftsmanship again Which trust me is a pritty one whilst I Devote my service to this Deity Emb. Sir you have given me the Queens Picture King Ha! What a mistake was here But thou art honest And covetest but thy own Take it Theodrick Now tell me of what house or Parentage Your Mistrisse is Emb. I told you first her Vertues Her person next and by this her beauty Which you are pleas'd to deem not much amisse King 'T is such Theodrick that had I not seen This so much above it pardon my hypocrisie I should have envied any man but thee In such a choice But speak her parentage Emb. That 's all her blemish King Is she of tainted blood Emb. You search with Kingly wisedom She is daughter To that hold obstinate Baron I enform'd you of Whom the Queen in her just displeasure banish'd King Thy love to her may hereafter plead for him But soft I am not well Emb. Heaven blesse the King Who waits within there King Tarry let me see That Picture once again It wants exceedingly Of this in many things Emb. I should want judgement Not to grant that King Here it wants palpably The drooping of the brow and here again The dulnesse of the Eye which here shews deadly But for a little squint it has Good Queen You look a squint Then look you Sir yours wants You shall not hear me neither cause I will not Spoil your conceit of it Your Lady wants The furious sharpnesse of the nose which here My Queen has very shrewly And again You han't the hanging of the nether lip Which the best Phisiognomists do tell us Shews women apt to lust and strong incontinence Phew This is all too sweet for mortal sense Here take 't again and keep mine for me with it Lay 'em together th' one may mend the tother Emb. I have known women oft marry one another Their Pictures may perhaps have greater vertue King I am not well what kind of Changeling am I A wild confusion rumbles in my brain My thoughts are all at strife Emb. How fares your Highnesse King Sick sick Theodrick Emb. Retire Sir to your Couch Enter 2. Lords 1. 2. Lor. Where is my Lord the King King Here yet my Lords Emb. The King 's not well 1. Lor. We have provided for your Highnesse journey In such a sort as never King went forth King Whither to Heaven my Lords 2. Lor. Yes to the Queen Lovers count marriage Heaven before they wed But afterwards I know what some have said Oh this is your honey moon Yes yes you shall to Heaven your Heaven as you call it In such a royal manner See the Order King Pray peace Emb. You do not well to vex the King You see he 's sick 1. Lor. Sick marry Heaven forbid 2. Lor. Sick o' the Wife before he has her Come a very trothplight qualm into your Chamber And at we find you we 'l our selves bestir Emb. Who waits within there call the Kings Physitians Exeunt omnes SCEN. II. A shout within the Musick sound the Bells Enter 4 Clowns with tools 1. AND what 's the reason of all this merry glee 2. The King the King man must be married 3. And must he have a Wife 2. A Wife a Queen man and all the Wives in her Dominion Must be his Commonwealth and under us 4. O brave 2. And we must son and daughter it upon their Nation 4. That will be brave indeed 1. O but where is Jeffrey jolly Jeffrey now the prick and praise The very prick and praise and prime Spark of our Parish to set our Bonefires and our Mirth a blazing 3. The Bells a ringing and the Bowls a trowling the Fidlers tumbling Tumbling O Jeffrey where art thou Jeffrey 2. He 's at hand I warrant you he went but to Church E'en now 4. What to pray at such a time as this 2. No but to help to rear the Tennor and will come Presently 3. That 's to be born withal It is indeed a divelish Lopheavy Bell. I would the Church-warden that Should have mended it when he robb'd the poor were Hug'd in 's place 2. There said you well The Curate could say almost as much When ' t was But it makes no matter what he saies I see Little amended 3. Whoop here comes Jeffrey sweating in these affairs Ent. Jeffrey Jeff. The great Bells of our Town they tingle they tangle They jingle they jangle the Tenner of them goes merrily 4. O Jeffrey welcome Jeffrey Jeff. And shall we have a Queen All. So they say Jeffrey O the bravest Woman Jeff. Take heed o'th at woman did you say Take heed I Give you warning No man must know she is a woman But the King himself But a brave Queen she is they say And loves a man with all her heart Where art O Queen we 'l make thee Such an holy day as shall Justle all the working dayes out of our Almanack It Shall be said that we will work no more till thy Seventh Son O Queen who must be born a Prophet shall Foretel the Age to come shall not have a true labourer Or honest workman in it 1. So we may make a long holyday indeed Jeff. Let work no more be thought on we will revel it out Of remembrance we will not cease our joy to sleep for Fear we dream of work again Down with your prophane Tools and Implements of Husbandry the very sight of 'em Dishonours our new holy day 1. But Jeffrey our Masters grudge to give us wood Enough to make a beaking Bonefire Jeff. How 2. They say 't is waste Jeff. Not wood to make a Bonefire Your Sheeplocks Flayles Spades Shovels Rakes and Pitchforks shall all be made a Bonefire 2. And so we may be sure to make holy day till We get new ones Jeff. The maids shall bring their Rocks their Wheels and Reels their Tubs their Pales Buttocks 4. Buckets thou wouldst say Jeff. Where was my mind Their Buckets shall they bring Wash-bowls and Butter-churns Their Buckingtubs Baskets and Battle-doors And all be made a Bonefire for the Queen 3. My mother will not let her house-holdstuff go so Jeff. We 'l burn her for a witch then with all her trash And her thatcht mansion too about her Ears But we will shew our zeal unto the Queen In fire sufficient All. 4. Ah good Boy Jeff. Sfoot if our Masters do rebel against us Now Majesty 's on our side and not give fewel When we mean to give fire as duty binds We 'l have their Carts by th' arses Hardles Wheelbarrows The Ploughs and Harrows and the Whips Because the Beasts shall play too only we 'l spare Their Racks and Mangers All that 's made of wood Belonging to our
work besides shall perish Shall perish I have said it Not the Politique Molecatchers staff shall scape the flame Not low us wood we 'l drink up all the drink to the Queens health And burn the Hogsheads Barrels Kilderkins Firkins and Rundlets all to the wooden dish Shall smoak for 't in our bonefire for the Queen All. Good boy again 1. But where shall we make this Houge and monstrious Bonefire Jeff. Here here just here in this very place I come to mark The ground here it shall blaze up to the Heavens and We will roast our Town Bull at it with a thousand Puddings in his belly All. 4. Ah good Jeffrey still Jeff. Nothing too dear to signifie our loves to the King and Queen let us bestir us therefore And enact this as a law amongst us That He that does not gall his hands to day with Ringing shall be hang'd up in the bell-rope And he that is not soundly liquor'd by night shall Be made fewel for our Bonefire such dry Rascals Will burn better then Hereticks And last of all he that does not keep his wench Waking in the way that we wot of till to morrow milking time shall either be Gelt or else led through the Town by that which Shall be namelesse in a cleft stick And so God save The Queen 1. And the King to Jeff. The King we make no doubt of we have pray'd For him these seven years All 4. A Jeffrey a Jeffrey Enter a Constable and Alfride Const Whither away my friends Jeff. To make the bravest bonefire that ever blaz'd since Troy or that which the Tyrant Emperor warm'd His hands at Const You must forbear Jeff. We must forbear what Hebrew 's that We understand not what must forbear means Const You must forbear to make your Bonefire Jeff. Must that word had nev'r been nam'd had all been Jeffrey We must forbear to set our loves on fire Unto the King Dost thou not feel thy self O man what e're thou art becoming a Traytor Knowst thou the words thou speakest against the King Const I know what I do speak and what I am 1. It is the Constable Const I know my Office too by vertue whereof I charge you in the Kings name lay by Your sports and pastimes I 'l lay you by the heels else Will you Sir know a reason the King is sick Jeff. Then let us drink his health Const He is sick exceedingly Jeff. Then let us drink exceedingly Const He 's sick even unto death Jeff. Then let us ring our Bells for that and make a Funeral Bonefire Const I say no drinking at all no Bells nor no Bonefires It is his Majesties command Jeff. I say his Majesties first word shall stand for Bells and Bonefires Though we set the Town a fire and ring the Bells backwards Const Ye will not be all hang'd will ye see Here 's a Gentleman and a Courtier that so signifies his Majesties pleasure Jeff. A Gentleman and a Courtier where be they I see but one Alfr. Sir I am both Jeff. What monsters are bred in Affrica I take you but For one at most well for the Gentleman that you Are thus I salute you Now for the Courtier that Is within you I must wait upon it here this posterior posture did I learn of a Spanniel whose name was Courtier Now let me tell you Master Gentleman and Courtier that we are Sorry that sicknesse should make our King and Master So fickle headed as to crosse our sports thus that we Meant to have made him such an holyday as might Have prov'd more worth to him than a Wife and Twenty sicknesses besides Yet can we not be so sorry for his sickness as that it Was his mishap to play mock holyday with us Alfr. The King shall know your loves and for your part Master Speaker Jeff. Your Friend and Jeffrey Alfr. Then Jeffrey be it I 'l promise you preferment if You will up to Court with me Jeff. Up to the Gallows shall I not Alfr. My life for thine And thou shalt not deny me Here 's Gold in earnest take it The Kings disease Is melancholy and thou mayst do him more good Then a whole Colledge of Physitians Jeff. He takes me for a fool I 'l make a venture on 't The best is many a Fool has thriv'd at Court and The worst is I am not the first that has forsaken His Country I 'l along with you Sir and if I rise By you I shall quickly learn Courtship enough To forget to thank you And for your parts my Old Friends what need soever you may have of Me you must be sure I 'l be a stranger to you All 4. Wilt thou forsake us Jeffrey then who shall daunce The hobby horse at our next Revel rout Jeff. The hobby horse of preferment gallops me from you If you chance to see me in my rolies hereafter When I come to be the Fool Royal you may admire my Garments and whisper to your acquaintance very softly That you knew me once But on your Allegiance look Not that I should know you then 1. Nay we are not such Clowns but we have heard that Courtiers in favour will know no body Jeff. 'T is true for when they are in disgrace the silliest Clown will not know them Const You were best look to your fast footing then when You are high in favour Jeff. High in fooling thou wouldst say silly Constable yet there 's no Great danger One fool may outstand six favourites Alfr. Away then as thou art Jeff. I Sir I 'l take no shift with me I shall shift The better when I come there All 4. Well farewel Jeffrey thy like will nev'r come here Jeff. Commend me to all the Lasses and let not them nor Do not you grieve for my departure nor for The holyday that here is lost instead of which that You may haue a new one I wish that one of you even he That loves me best as speedily as may be would deserve Hanging that the rest may make holyday for him Sic valete valetote 1. Now the Dee'l brast crag of him 2. He 's a right Courtier already 4. I 'm glad he us'd us no better If he had I should have cried out mine eyes for him Exeunt omnes SCEN. III. Enter Segebert Anthynus Seg. 'T Was a miraculus escape Good Heaven Is with me still I have not heard That any of these native Salvages These home-bred monsters in humanity These out-laws these detested Thieves and Robbers Have enterpriz'd a villany like this To set with such a violence on men Of our weak seeming poor and needy Pilgrims When I did offer them to shun their blows All that we had even to our bare apparel Anth. It seems their aym was at our blood not means And doubtlesse they were some that knew our persons Through our disguises and persu'd us hither With an inveterate malice to destroy us In this wild Desart Seg. Was it not enough Thou impious
Queen and more unnatural Country To banish me unjustly but thou must Pursue my life by treacherous cruelty Art thou not hurt at all my Son Anth. Not touch'd To the least danger of one drop of blood Seg. They are three sturdy Knaves and strongly weapon'd Anth Had they been forty Sir while I was arm'd By your white Innocence and holy Prayers Heavens justice lent me hands to bear them off Yet give me leave dear Sir to ask you now Why you have bent your Pilgrimage this way Leading into a country of more danger Unto your life and safety then your own Northumberland whose King cannot but rage In greater heat against you then the Queen That so unjustly banish'd you you may fall Though you escape the danger of this Forrest Into the reach of his revengeful fury Seg. It was and is my purpose to appear In person to that King at my lifes price Which I am no more fond of then my Country Is of my truth And when I have made known Th' unfitness of the march by the dishonour Hell run into if he proceed in it If then he take my life I am at home Eternally at home Anth. But made you none Acquainted that you meant to travel this way Seg. None But my dear son Offa. Anth. Then sure the Queen Sent her Blood-hounds after you I perceive They could not be mere Thieves Seg. Good Angels guard us They have made head again in greater numbers Enter Offa disguis'd and Outlaws Anth. Take greater courage then Off. Faint-hearted slaves Must I give hire and do the task my self 1. Outl. 'T is not amisse to help for expedition All. Upon 'em all at once They fight Anthynus knock down 1. Outlaw Offa wounds Segebert in the head he sincks Anthynus disarms Offa. Offa runs off whilst Anthynus speaks Anth. This sword thou never handlest more Take you it and fresh courage Sir Anth. Beats off the other and speaks on May you not cease your flight till you reach Hell That bred ye villans to pursue ye further Were to neglect a nearer duty Dear honour'd Sir look up Father how do you Seg. Even almost well I hope Anth. He means with death Alas he 's deeply wounded and bleeds much But what do I in this I have not tears Enough to wash these wounds although some linnen To bind them up But mearly to bewail him With looks and lamentations is as fruitlesse As here to leave him languishing to death And run in pursuit of his enemies To work revenge Neither of these bring ease Mount up my thoughts to Heaven then for a blessing Upon my ready industry and let each faculty Of mine as prompt to works and prayers be How is it now Sir do I not bind it too hard Pray Sir speak to me Seg. Offa oh son Offa Anth. Offa is not here Sir 't is I your son Anthynus Why look you on that sword so Seg. O son Offa Anth. Pray Sir look on me I fear his memory fails him And as his mind was ever on Offa Before unfortunate me so now he gives The merit that belongs if any be Due to the duty of a son in this From me to him But envy be thou from me Why look you on that sword and not on me 'T was I that wonne it for you Seg. O Anthynus Anth. That 's well said Sir speak though but faintly to me I had rather hear your groans then find you speechlesse Better will come I hope Seg. Help me to rise Anth. That 's comfortably spoken so well done Like a strong man again Seg. O I am weak Anth. Rest upon me my strength my all is yours Aeneas that true Troian son whose fame For piety ever crowns his name Had not a will although my means be poor Exceeding mine to answer nature more Well said that step became you we shall on I see apace give me your sword it troubles you Seg. No not this sword Anth. That 's the best sign of all Keep it and hold it fast Sir we will back A little to the Spring we came by where I 'l somewhat more accommodate your wounds Heaven which mens honest pains doth ever blesse Will when we least can hope afford redresse Exeunt 1. Outl. Oh oh some help oh Enter an Hermit and Servant with a Basket Herm. Hark didst thou not hear a cry Serv. Of nothing but My guts that cry within me Sir for meat I hear no other cry nor have not done Outl. Oh. Serv. Almost these 5. years Herm. Peace thou belly-god 't was there again Serv. It is a belly-divel rather that has tormented me E're since I serv'd you under ground hereby No man Above ground could have fasted like me Herm. Hast thou not dayly food thou Caterpiller Serv. Yes such as Caterpillers eat Blossomes and Buds many green growing things Such as you make your medicines of and Roots would I could get Some of the Caterpillers A dish of Caterpillers fryed Let me see in what in Usurers grease if one Knew where to get it might serve to feast an Emperour But we live out o th' world by Prayer and Fasting Herm. Thou farest as I fare feedest as oft as I. Serv But Sir there 's difference in our exercises If I Could spend my time whole dayes in prayer as You do this kind of fare or fasting Rather would not be so bitter to me Outl. Oh. Herm. Didst thou not hear it now Serv. Yes something like the croaking of a Frog me thought If it Were one I would wade up to the waste for 't For my supper Here here Sir here 't is here 's more Work for you Once a week we are commonly troubled Either to cure or bury one or other thank the Outlaws they make us work for nothing here as if we dwelt Here for the purpose nor do I know other indeed Herm. Look up man canst thou speak Outl. O no. Serv. There 's great hope of recovery you hear he Sayes he cannot speak Herm. Canst thou hold up thy hands and lift up thine eyes Serv. He does he does hang 't he 'l do well enough Herm. Help up his body then down into my Cave Serv. And to morrow up with him again and then down Into a grave Better let him lie now Sir You 'l ne're do good on him I doubt He looks So damnably as if the Divel were at my elbow For him Herm. Peace knave in charity I 'l do my best Heaven hitherto my labours well has bless'd Serv. Nay had I his weight in Venison so neer kill'd and might be allow'd to Eat it I would ask no more flesh while I liv'd Here enter Offa and the Outlaws assuring him they are dead Enter Anthynus carrying Segebert in his Arms. Anth. Can no release be had is this the place That cursed piece of ground which Nature meant Should be call'd Hell on Earth where outrage reigns Murder and cruelty beyond it deep despair To a poor remnant of distressed life Of al
Strong Traitors else to let that match go forwards Nor heard we of it until now the Post That brings the news o th' Kings and Queens approach Arriv'd here in the City Osr All think him then their King still Eth. Yes yes and though he told us who he was The overwise Lords imputed that to his madnesse Osr It seems he was not so mad but he could take The Queen into my bed Eth. Where she lik'd him so well That she now brings him home unto her own Still thinking him your person Osr Whilst I lie here for his Accus'd of Parricide but I will not Reveal my self till trial Ent. Mildred Now all my sufferings are turn'd into delightful recreations Fairest of Virgins welcome marvail not That at first sight I knew you when my heart Wears the Impression of your Portraiture And all my intellectual faculties Bow to no other object but your beauty Mild. O Sir lay by this high dissimulation For though I find you now are not my brother Osr Lo ye she knows I am not Anthynus Her vertue like the Sun will clear the mist Of error we were lost in Mild. Not Anthynus Yes the bright Sun discovers not a truth More evident then that you are Anthynus Nor ever shin'd on man I lov'd so well Or hop'd to marry since you are not my brother Osr I understand not this Mild. Indeed I came To tell you so and could you clear your hand Of the foul stain of blood you are accus'd of Were I sole monarchess of all this Island I 'd kneel to beg a brides place in your bed Osr If I can clear my self Mild. Nay mark me further If you clear not your self I 'l not outlive you To call to mind the man that I so lov'd Butcher'd his Father though he were not mine I lov'd him as a father oh good heaven How good how reverend a man was he Osr Weep not but hear me or hear me though you weep I am not Anthynus Mild. I may say as well I do not love you Osr I never had an hand In blood of any man Mild. Prove that I am yours Osr Fetch me a Priest Edel. I saw one i' th next room Drinking and singing catches with some Prisoners Ed. Withhold your hands Anthynus now again Fair Lady is your brother Mild. Why did you mock me then Ed. To save you from your brother Offa's lust I feign'd that you were not his Sister In hope to marry you he might forbear His divelish purpose Mild. Now I am lost for ever In being the Daughter of a murder'd Father And made uncapable of you in marriage Osr Yet hear me and be comforted Mild. O me Ed. Hark my Lord Anthynus Osr I do not know that name Ed. Go to go to nor you do not remember How I behav'd my self upon the eating of Spurging Comfects that your Brother Offa gave me And laid the fault on you pray Jove I say this murder Be no more his fault then yours A shout within Enter Keeper Osr Hark the wide world abroad is fill'd with joy And must we only be shut from it now Keep My Lord Anthynus Osr Still must I be Anthynus Keep You are call'd unto your Trial. Osr Who are my Judges Keep Those that are bribe-free I dare warrant ' em It may perhaps go somewhat the harder with you For nothing but white innocence can quit you Pray heaven you hav 't about you even the King And Queen the Queen and King I should have said For she 's our Soveraign 't is her Law must do it Osr What King do you mean then Keep King Osriick you know nothing Osr Yes I know him as well as he knows himself Keep Take heed Sir what you say Osr I fear him not But am as good as he now carry me for something Mild. O pray take heed Keep How Mild. Peace he did not say so Keep Slid he 's as mad as his brother Offa. Osr Is Offa mad Keep O quite besides himself and talks the strangliest Of his fathers murder your running away And the desire he has to hang his brother here And then he is haunted with sprites too they say You will know all anon will you go my Lord Osr Yes will you be so kind as to see my Trial Mild. Indeed I must not leave you Keep 'T is a kinde part indeed and may become A Sister like the wise that would not leave Her husband till she saw him totter Set the best foot forward and the best face You can my Lord upon the businesse Exeunt Hoboys Enter Theodwald and Eaufride Kelrick and Elkwin Theodrick Anthynus and Bertha Omn. Long live King Osriick and Queen Bertha Anth. I joyn with ye in your wishes for the Queen And wish well to King Osriick as a stranger Omn. How 's this Anth. But will no longer personate him For now be it known to you that I am no Osriick But he that warns you call me so no more Bert. What means my love Anth. Nay Madam 't is most serious Kelr. Elkw. Blesse us Theodw. He 's madder now then e're he was Eauf. I am at my wits end too if marriage Will not tame him I know not what to say to 't Anth. I have told you truth and your fair grace can witnesse How violently I was thrown upon the fortune I thank those provident Lords against my vow Bert. I take it as the providence of Heaven And from the Son of that most injur'd Father Whom now in my joys strength I could shed tears for I yield you are my head and I your handmaid She sets him down and kneels he takes her up Eauf. So so a few nights trial has got her liking For ever fast enough what notable old Cockscombs Have we been made nay made ourselves indeed Anth. Now further know my Lords I am Anthynus The Son of that old honest Lord ' gainst whom Your sulphurous malice kindled the Queens anger Elkw. who 'l have an head now for an half penny Kelr. And for tother two Tokens mine into the Bargain Enter Keeper with Osriick Ethelswick Edith Alfride Edelred Guard Keep Make way there for the Prisoner Eauf. See King Osriick Theodw. I this is our King indeed Theodr. O let me wash your feet Sir with my tears Osr Thy trespasse is thine honour my Theodrick And I must thank your care my Lords as it deserves Your over-reaching care to give my Dignity As much as in you lay unto another And for your betters counterfeit in my name By which the Queen is mock'd into a marriage Theodw. That was your policy your wit my Lord. Eauf. A shame on 't would I were hang'd that I Might hear no more on 't Bert. Fair Sir the Queen is pleas'd and hopes you are In her that 's so much fairer in your thoughts Anth My Sister Mildred Osr Yet my noble Brother She stands in fortune equal with your self In being mine Anth. But not great Sir untill You are acquitted of my