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A34544 Self-imployment in secret ... left under the hand-writing of that learned & reverend divine, Mr. John Corbet ...; with a prefatory epistle of Mr. John Howe. Corbet, John, 1620-1680.; Howe, John, 1630-1705. 1681 (1681) Wing C6265; ESTC R32518 22,650 98

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Salvation Iohn Howe Mr. CORBET's ENQUIRY INTO THE State of his Soul His Introduction IN order to peace of conscience and assurance of my good estate towards God it must in reason be supposed that I may rightly understand the marks of sincerity set down in Gods Word as also the predominant inclination and motions of my own soul and that I may be so far assured of my right understanding of the things aforesaid as to have no reasonable ground of doubting thereof For I have no other ordinary way to know my sincerity in order to the said peace and assurance but to examine it according to my best understanding by the marks thereof set down in Gods Word In this Self-Examination it is requisite that I use all Diligence and Impartiality with Constancy and that I earnestly pray for Gods assistance in it and heartily offer my self to his search as David did Psal. 139. 23. Wherefore if upon the most impartial and diligent search that I can make according to the best of my understanding together with earnest and constant Prayer to God to assist me therein as in my greatest concern it doth most rationally appear to me that the predominant inclination and motions of my soul are agreeable to the marks of sincerity set down in Gods Word then my conscience doing its office aright is to judge for me accordingly viz. that I am sincere And in this judgment I am to acquiesce because it is the Judgment of Gods Agent and Minister which he hath set up within me to judge under him of my internal state according to his Law by which he himself doth and will judge me God hath the same aspect upon the Soul which Conscience his Vicegerent hath as it from time to time or ordinarily judgeth not against him or without him but under him and according to his judgment either acquitting or condemning To this purpose the Apostle speaketh 1 John 3. 20 21. If our heart condemn us God is greater than our Heart and knoweth all things If our heart condemn us not then have we confidence towards God The State of my Own SOUL According to the strictest Search that I can make Psal. 139. 23 24. Search me O Lord and know my Heart try me and know my Thoughts and see if there be any wicked way in me and lead me in the way Everlasting Amen The following particulars were set down in Decemb. Jan. Feb. An. 1663. AS far as I am able to discern my heart and wayes I have chosen the Lord for my portion I take up my rest in him and not in the Creature To love and fear and admire and bless him and to have communion with him is my chief joy And the eternal Vision and Fruition of God is my great hope I would not only have God herafter but here in this World for my chief good He is even now better than all the World I come to God by Jesus Christ. And as I believe in God I believe also in Christ and rejoyce and glory in him and acknowledging my own sinfulness and unworthyness I rest intirely on him as the ground of my justification to Life and of all favour and acceptance with God I receive Christ as my Lord and give up my self to him I let him into my heart by Faith I esteem him precious and am willing to suffer the loss of all that I may win him I desire to know him in the Power of his Death and Resurrection and am much grieved that I do so weakly experience that power and feel it no more operative in me in my dying to sin and 〈◊〉 World and in living and walking in the Spirit I do not cease to lament the more heinous sins of my Life and cannot forbear the continual imploring of the pardon of them I do not return again to them and I resolve never so to do I watch and pray and strive against all sin but especially against those sins to which I am more especially inclined my conflicts are daily and am put hard to it But I do not yield up my self to any sin nor lie down in it yea I do not suffer sinful Cogitations to lodge in me Howbeit I am many times much discomposed damped in Spirit deadned in Duty distracted in my Studies and molested and hindered every way by the sin that dwelleth in me But I resolve that sin shall have no rest in my soul and that I will never injoy it Though I cannot keep sin out of my heart yet it doth not reign in my mortal body nor do I yield my members to the service of it I would fulfil all Righteousness and owe nothing to any man but love I had a hundred sold rather suffer wrong than do wrong It was said of Christ that no guile was found in his mouth and of the faithful Company that followed the Lamb that no guile was found in their mouth And that it may be so with me I indeavour with my whole heart I trust God with my chiefest outward Concernment even with that about which I am most Solicitous and wherein to be satisfied is of great moment to me for that it hath as great an influence upon my Spirit as any outward thing hath And I do believe that God will provide for me herein or otherwise supply the want of it My earnest desire of God is that my outward condition may be so stated by his Wife and Gracious providence as I may be least exposed to temptation and best disposed and furthered unto Duty I have an Inclination to seek Self particularly in vain applause and that in Religious services and herein I have been highly guilty but I shame my self for it before God and I am willing to be satisfied in the Praise that comes from him alone and I trust through his Grace that I can deny my self in matter of Reputation to do his Will I love the Lord Jesus Christ and all his Saints The broken estate of the Church especialy by intestine Evils is a great trouble to my Spirit The scandals of professors I am truly grieved at and I would not by their weaknesses seek to excuse my own faults or an advancing of my own Virtues I have no setled Bitterness and Revenge against my Enemies but I love pitty and pray for them As concerning God's Enemies I am more provoked but I would not be inhumane or cruel against them For the wrath of Man worketh not the Righteousness of God I contemn none I would not imbitter the Spirit of any I would answer all obligations of courtesy as accounting it a Righteousness I would not insult over the weakness of any and this is partly out of Natural tenderness and Moral Considerations and I find that the goodness and kindness of God the meekness gentleness of Christ hath here unto made Impression upon me I find upon the review of my Life past according to the clearest judgment that I can make that I have not gone