salvation_n john_n howe_n mr._n corbet_n enquiry_n into_o the_o state_n of_o his_o soul_n his_o introduction_n in_o order_n to_o peace_n of_o conscience_n and_o assurance_n of_o my_o good_a estate_n towards_o god_n it_o must_v in_o reason_n be_v suppose_v that_o i_o may_v right_o understand_v the_o mark_n of_o sincerity_n set_v down_o in_o god_n word_n as_o also_o the_o predominant_a inclination_n and_o motion_n of_o my_o own_o soul_n and_o that_o i_o may_v be_v so_o far_o assure_v of_o my_o right_a understanding_n of_o the_o thing_n aforesaid_a as_o to_o have_v no_o reasonable_a ground_n of_o doubt_v thereof_o for_o i_o have_v no_o other_o ordinary_a way_n to_o know_v my_o sincerity_n in_o order_n to_o the_o say_a peace_n and_o assurance_n but_o to_o examine_v it_o according_a to_o my_o best_a understanding_n by_o the_o mark_n thereof_o set_v down_o in_o god_n word_n in_o this_o self-examination_n it_o be_v requisite_a that_o i_o use_v all_o diligence_n and_o impartiality_n with_o constancy_n and_o that_o i_o earnest_o pray_v for_o god_n assistance_n in_o it_o and_o hearty_o offer_v myself_o to_o his_o search_n as_o david_n do_v psal._n 139._o 23._o wherefore_o if_o upon_o the_o most_o impartial_a and_o diligent_a search_n that_o i_o can_v make_v according_a to_o the_o best_a of_o my_o understanding_n together_o with_o earnest_n and_o constant_a prayer_n to_o god_n to_o assist_v i_o therein_o as_o in_o my_o great_a concern_n it_o do_v most_o rational_o appear_v to_o i_o that_o the_o predominant_a inclination_n and_o motion_n of_o my_o soul_n be_v agreeable_a to_o the_o mark_n of_o sincerity_n set_v down_o in_o god_n word_n than_o my_o conscience_n do_v its_o office_n aright_o be_v to_o judge_v for_o i_o according_o viz._n that_o i_o be_o sincere_a and_o in_o this_o judgement_n i_o be_o to_o acquiesce_v because_o it_o be_v the_o judgement_n of_o god_n agent_n and_o minister_n which_o he_o have_v set_v up_o within_o i_o to_o judge_v under_o he_o of_o my_o internal_a state_n according_a to_o his_o law_n by_o which_o he_o himself_o do_v and_o will_v judge_v i_o god_n have_v the_o same_o aspect_n upon_o the_o soul_n which_o conscience_n his_o vicegerent_n have_v as_o it_o from_o time_n to_o time_n or_o ordinary_o judge_v not_o against_o he_o or_o without_o he_o but_o under_o he_o and_o according_a to_o his_o judgement_n either_o acquit_v or_o condemn_v to_o this_o purpose_n the_o apostle_n speak_v 1_o john_n 3._o 20_o 21._o if_o our_o heart_n condemn_v we_o god_n be_v great_a than_o our_o heart_n and_o know_v all_o thing_n if_o our_o heart_n condemn_v we_o not_o then_o have_v we_o confidence_n towards_o god_n the_o state_n of_o my_o own_o soul_n according_a to_o the_o strict_a search_n that_o i_o can_v make_v psal._n 139._o 23_o 24._o search_v i_o o_o lord_n and_o know_v my_o heart_n try_v i_o and_o know_v my_o thought_n and_o see_v if_o there_o be_v any_o wicked_a way_n in_o i_o and_o lead_v i_o in_o the_o way_n everlasting_a amen_n the_o follow_a particular_n be_v set_v down_o in_o decemb._n jan._n feb._n an._n 1663._o as_o far_o as_o i_o be_o able_a to_o discern_v my_o heart_n and_o way_n i_o have_v choose_v the_o lord_n for_o my_o portion_n i_o take_v up_o my_o rest_n in_o he_o and_o not_o in_o the_o creature_n to_o love_v and_o fear_n and_o admire_v and_o bless_v he_o and_o to_o have_v communion_n with_o he_o be_v my_o chief_a joy_n and_o the_o eternal_a vision_n and_o fruition_n of_o god_n be_v my_o great_a hope_n i_o will_v not_o only_o have_v god_n hereafter_o but_o here_o in_o this_o world_n for_o my_o chief_a good_a he_o be_v even_o now_o better_o than_o all_o the_o world_n i_o come_v to_o god_n by_o jesus_n christ._n and_o as_o i_o believe_v in_o god_n i_o believe_v also_o in_o christ_n and_o rejoice_v and_o glory_n in_o he_o and_o acknowledge_v my_o own_o sinfulness_n and_o unworthiness_n i_o rest_v entire_o on_o he_o as_o the_o ground_n of_o my_o justification_n to_o life_n and_o of_o all_o favour_n and_o acceptance_n with_o god_n i_o receive_v christ_n as_o my_o lord_n and_o give_v up_o myself_o to_o he_o i_o let_v he_o into_o my_o heart_n by_o faith_n i_o esteem_v he_o precious_a and_o be_o willing_a to_o suffer_v the_o loss_n of_o all_o that_o i_o may_v win_v he_o i_o desire_v to_o know_v he_o in_o the_o power_n of_o his_o death_n and_o resurrection_n and_o be_o much_o grieve_v that_o i_o do_v so_o weak_o experience_n that_o power_n and_o feel_v it_o no_o more_o operative_a in_o i_o in_o my_o die_n to_o sin_n and_o 〈◊〉_d world_n and_o in_o live_v and_o walk_v in_o the_o spirit_n i_o do_v not_o cease_v to_o lament_v the_o more_o heinous_a sin_n of_o my_o life_n and_o can_v forbear_v the_o continual_a implore_v of_o the_o pardon_n of_o they_o i_o do_v not_o return_v again_o to_o they_o and_o i_o resolve_v never_o so_o to_o do_v i_o watch_v and_o pray_v and_o strive_v against_o all_o sin_n but_o especial_o against_o those_o sin_n to_o which_o i_o be_o more_o especial_o incline_v my_o conflict_n be_v daily_o and_o be_o put_v hard_o to_o it_o but_o i_o do_v not_o yield_v up_o myself_o to_o any_o sin_n nor_o lie_v down_o in_o it_o yea_o i_o do_v not_o suffer_v sinful_a cogitation_n to_o lodge_v in_o i_o howbeit_o i_o be_o many_o time_n much_o discompose_v damp_a in_o spirit_n deadn_v in_o duty_n distract_v in_o my_o study_n and_o molest_v and_o hinder_v every_o way_n by_o the_o sin_n that_o dwell_v in_o i_o but_o i_o resolve_v that_o sin_n shall_v have_v no_o rest_n in_o my_o soul_n and_o that_o i_o will_v never_o enjoy_v it_o though_o i_o can_v keep_v sin_n out_o of_o my_o heart_n yet_o it_o do_v not_o reign_v in_o my_o mortal_a body_n nor_o do_v i_o yield_v my_o member_n to_o the_o service_n of_o it_o i_o will_v fulfil_v all_o righteousness_n and_o owe_v nothing_o to_o any_o man_n but_o love_n i_o have_v a_o hundred_o sold_n rather_o suffer_v wrong_a than_o do_v wrong_n it_o be_v say_v of_o christ_n that_o no_o guile_n be_v find_v in_o his_o mouth_n and_o of_o the_o faithful_a company_n that_o follow_v the_o lamb_n that_o no_o guile_n be_v find_v in_o their_o mouth_n and_o that_o it_o may_v be_v so_o with_o i_o i_o endeavour_v with_o my_o whole_a heart_n i_o trust_v god_n with_o my_o chief_a outward_a concernment_n even_o with_o that_o about_o which_o i_o be_o most_o solicitous_a and_o wherein_o to_o be_v satisfy_v be_v of_o great_a moment_n to_o i_o for_o that_o it_o have_v as_o great_a a_o influence_n upon_o my_o spirit_n as_o any_o outward_a thing_n have_v and_o i_o do_v believe_v that_o god_n will_v provide_v for_o i_o herein_o or_o otherwise_o supply_v the_o want_n of_o it_o my_o earnest_a desire_n of_o god_n be_v that_o my_o outward_a condition_n may_v be_v so_o state_v by_o his_o wife_n and_o gracious_a providence_n as_o i_o may_v be_v least_o expose_v to_o temptation_n and_o best_a dispose_v and_o further_v unto_o duty_n i_o have_v a_o inclination_n to_o seek_v self_n particular_o in_o vain_a applause_n and_o that_o in_o religious_a service_n and_o herein_o i_o have_v be_v high_o guilty_a but_o i_o shame_v myself_o for_o it_o before_o god_n and_o i_o be_o willing_a to_o be_v satisfy_v in_o the_o praise_n that_o come_v from_o he_o alone_o and_o i_o trust_v through_o his_o grace_n that_o i_o can_v deny_v myself_o in_o matter_n of_o reputation_n to_o do_v his_o will._n i_o love_v the_o lord_n jesus_n christ_n and_o all_o his_o saint_n the_o break_a estate_n of_o the_o church_n especial_o by_o intestine_a evil_n be_v a_o great_a trouble_n to_o my_o spirit_n the_o scandal_n of_o professor_n i_o be_o true_o grieve_v at_o and_o i_o will_v not_o by_o their_o weakness_n seek_v to_o excuse_v my_o own_o fault_n or_o a_o advance_n of_o my_o own_o virtue_n i_o have_v no_o settle_a bitterness_n and_o revenge_n against_o my_o enemy_n but_o i_o love_v pity_n and_o pray_v for_o they_o as_o concern_v god_n enemy_n i_o be_o more_o provoke_v but_o i_o will_v not_o be_v inhuman_a or_o cruel_a against_o they_o for_o the_o wrath_n of_o man_n work_v not_o the_o righteousness_n of_o god_n i_o contemn_v none_o i_o will_v not_o embitter_v the_o spirit_n of_o any_o i_o will_v answer_v all_o obligation_n of_o courtesy_n as_o account_v it_o a_o righteousness_n i_o will_v not_o insult_v over_o the_o weakness_n of_o any_o and_o this_o be_v partly_o out_o of_o natural_a tenderness_n and_o moral_a consideration_n and_o i_o find_v that_o the_o goodness_n and_o kindness_n of_o god_n the_o meekness_n gentleness_n of_o christ_n have_v here_o unto_o make_v impression_n upon_o i_o i_o find_v upon_o the_o review_n of_o my_o life_n past_o according_a to_o the_o clear_a judgement_n that_o i_o can_v make_v that_o i_o have_v not_o go_v
god_n thus_o i_o be_o search_v and_o try_v my_o heart_n and_o way_n and_o what_o i_o find_v by_o myself_o i_o write_v down_o that_o i_o may_v have_v it_o by_o i_o for_o my_o relief_n in_o a_o evil_a day_n and_o a_o hour_n of_o temptation_n for_o i_o must_v expect_v the_o time_n when_o by_o weakness_n or_o anguish_n of_o body_n or_o mind_n i_o may_v be_v disable_v to_o recollect_v myself_o and_o due_o to_o state_n the_o case_n of_o my_o own_o soul_n and_o the_o power_n of_o nature_n may_v so_o fail_v that_o i_o may_v have_v but_o a_o very_a weak_a apprehension_n of_o what_o i_o have_v to_o do_v in_o this_o great_a concernment_n i_o be_o warn_v by_o the_o parable_n of_o the_o ten_o virgin_n to_o look_v to_o it_o that_o together_o with_o my_o lamp_n i_o may_v have_v oil_n in_o my_o vessel_n and_o be_v ready_a to_o enter_v in_o with_o the_o bridegroom_n at_o his_o come_n lord_n be_v merciful_a to_o i_o a_o sinner_n to_o i_o one_o of_o the_o chief_a of_o sinner_n o_o my_o exceed_a sinfulness_n o_o the_o riches_n of_o thy_o goodness_n towards_o i_o shall_v not_o i_o loathe_v my_o carnal_a self_n shall_v not_o i_o grieve_v for_o grieve_v thy_o spirit_n i_o desire_v to_o do_v so_o i_o hope_v to_o do_v so_o do_v what_o thou_o will_v with_o i_o so_o thou_o pardon_v and_o sanctify_v and_o save_v i_o i_o be_o afraid_a of_o thy_o judgement_n i_o can_v endure_v but_o little_a o_o how_o weak_a be_v my_o heart_n nevertheless_o i_o will_v endeavour_v and_o i_o trust_v through_o grace_n that_o that_o i_o shall_v be_v enable_v to_o bear_v thy_o correct_a hand_n thou_o be_v wise_a and_o holy_a thou_o be_v merciful_a and_o gracious_a thou_o retaine_v not_o thy_o anger_n for_o ever_o because_o thou_o delight_v in_o mercy_n o_o spare_v i_o and_o consider_v i_o and_o deal_v with_o i_o not_o after_o my_o sin_n and_o reward_v i_o not_o after_o my_o iniquity_n but_o as_o far_o as_o the_o east_n be_v from_o the_o west_n so_o far_o remove_v my_o transgression_n from_o i_o comfort_v i_o and_o satisfy_v i_o for_o i_o wait_v for_o relief_n from_o thou_o whatsoever_o befall_v i_o i_o will_v put_v my_o trust_n in_o thou_o i_o believe_v o_o lord_n help_v my_o unbelief_n lord_n increase_v my_o faith_n o_o my_o god_n i_o lie_v at_o thy_o foot_n and_o mercy_n i_o put_v my_o sinful_a distress_a soul_n into_o the_o hand_n of_o jesus_n christ_n and_o i_o rest_v on_o the_o covenant_n of_o grace_n make_v in_o he_o as_o all_o my_o salvation_n and_o all_o my_o desire_n amen_n more_o observation_n touch_v the_o state_n of_o my_o soul_n march_v the_o 27_o 1676._o o_o the_o wonderful_a mercy_n of_o god_n towards_o i_o a_o most_o vile_a and_o â—â—etched_a sinner_n in_o convince_a rebuke_v and_o awaken_n i_o unto_o a_o self-abhorrence_a and_o a_o utter_a detestation_n of_o my_o sin_n my_o special_a sin_n so_o that_o i_o can_v be_v reconcile_v to_o they_o since_o the_o more_o powerful_a awaken_n of_o my_o conscience_n i_o never_o have_v and_o be_o persuade_v never_o shall_v return_v to_o those_o former_a sin_n which_o make_v a_o breach_n between_o god_n and_o my_o soul_n i_o hate_v every_o sin_n impartial_o a_o sinful_a state_n be_v in_o my_o internal_a sense_n a_o horrid_a and_o a_o hellish_a state_n i_o find_v myself_o firm_o resolve_v to_o give_v up_o any_o part_n of_o my_o worldly_a estate_n that_o i_o shall_v be_v find_v to_o hold_v to_o another_o wrong_n if_o it_o be_v doubtful_a where_o the_o right_a lie_n i_o be_o resolve_v first_o to_o endeavour_v a_o reference_n to_o conscientious_a know_a man_n and_o if_o that_o can_v be_v fit_o have_v to_o submit_v it_o to_o a_o legal_a trial_n with_o a_o desire_n that_o right_o may_v take_v place_n i_o know_v not_o that_o i_o hold_v any_o 〈◊〉_d estate_n or_o that_o there_o be_v any_o doubt_n of_o my_o legal_a right_n to_o any_o thing_n that_o i_o possess_v but_o i_o have_v make_v supposition_n for_o the_o trial_n of_o my_o own_o spirit_n when_o i_o have_v a_o father_n or_o mother_n i_o will_v have_v trust_v they_o to_o defend_v or_o deliver_v i_o from_o any_o evil_n from_o which_o it_o be_v in_o their_o power_n to_o defend_v or_o deliver_v i_o in_o the_o same_o manner_n i_o now_o trust_v to_o my_o love_a wife_n why_o then_o shall_v i_o be_v suspicious_a of_o god_n in_o who_o hand_n i_o be_o why_o shall_v i_o doubt_v of_o his_o dear_a love_n and_o tender_a mercy_n towards_o i_o or_o call_v in_o question_n his_o good_a will_n to_o preserve_v or_o deliver_v i_o from_o any_o affliction_n that_o will_v be_v too_o hard_a for_o i_o to_o bear_v or_o to_o sustain_v and_o comfort_v i_o under_o any_o suffer_v which_o he_o see_v fit_a to_o inflict_v upon_o i_o if_o when_o i_o be_v more_o careless_a and_o forgetful_a of_o god_n and_o when_o i_o venture_v upon_o breach_n with_o he_o he_o be_v please_v to_o convince_v i_o of_o my_o sin_n and_o to_o rouse_v i_o up_o to_o a_o great_a care_n and_o to_o make_v i_o more_o earnest_a for_o pardon_n and_o for_o healing_n and_o for_o all_o needful_a grace_n and_o more_o thorough_o resolve_v to_o follow_v he_o throughout_o sure_o he_o will_v not_o refuse_v i_o in_o my_o address_n for_o more_o grace_n and_o a_o more_o confirm_a state_n of_o holiness_n if_o i_o follow_v on_o to_o know_v the_o lord_n i_o shall_v know_v he_o and_o see_v his_o salvation_n though_o death_n and_o judgement_n be_v of_o dreadful_a consideration_n though_o god_n be_v holy_a and_o just_a and_o i_o be_v vile_a and_o guilty_a and_o worthy_a of_o eternal_a perdition_n yet_o why_o shall_v i_o doubt_v of_o mercy_n and_o forgiveness_n and_o of_o support_n and_o comfort_n in_o the_o darkness_n of_o death_n and_o of_o justification_n in_o the_o day_n of_o judgement_n from_o a_o merciful_a and_o faithful_a god_n through_o a_o powerful_a redeemer_n and_o advocate_n see_v as_o a_o humble_a penitent_a believer_n i_o lie_v at_o his_o foot_n and_o cast_v myself_o into_o his_o arm_n and_o wait_v on_o his_o grace_n and_o be_o resolve_v to_o keep_v his_o way_n and_o never_o to_o return_v to_o folly_n i_o more_o desire_n to_o be_v sincere_a than_o to_o know_v that_o i_o be_o so_o the_o comfort_n and_o delight_n of_o be_v and_o do_v good_a i_o fetch_v not_o so_o much_o by_o as_o the_o very_o be_v and_o do_v good_n to_o love_n god_n and_o to_o be_v conformable_a to_o he_o be_v that_o which_o i_o most_o of_o all_o desire_n shall_v be_v in_o i_o i_o will_v trust_v god_n in_o his_o way_n i_o will_v strive_v against_o a_o over-timorous_a solicitude_n about_o my_o own_o salvation_n and_o will_v commit_v myself_o to_o god_n who_o be_v the_o infinite_a goodness_n and_o love_n and_o i_o will_v lie_v down_o and_o take_v my_o repose_n therein_o i_o be_o grieve_v when_o i_o observe_v or_o hear_v of_o the_o scandal_n of_o some_o professor_n and_o the_o disorder_n of_o those_o that_o be_v in_o charity_n to_o bejudge_v sincere_a and_o the_o folly_n and_o frailty_n of_o the_o more_o sincere_a and_o upright_a and_o it_o humble_v i_o by_o cause_v i_o to_o reflect_v upon_o myself_o and_o my_o own_o faultiness_n and_o weakness_n and_o proness_n to_o offend_v and_o it_o make_v i_o more_o to_o desire_v the_o heavenly_a society_n and_o to_o be_v among_o the_o spirit_n of_o just_a man_n make_v perfect_a my_o sin_n of_o sensuality_n in_o every_o kind_n and_o degree_n i_o search_v out_o and_o repent_v of_o i_o be_o keep_v by_o grace_n from_o gross_a sin_n of_o this_o sort_n in_o the_o gratification_n of_o sense_n which_o be_v lawful_a in_o general_n i_o scrupulous_o dread_a excess_n and_o unduness_n of_o circumstance_n how_o earnest_o do_v i_o desire_v a_o absolute_a purity_n all_o envy_n unrighteousness_n uncharitableness_n uncompassionateness_n undutifulness_n and_o base_a selfishness_n which_o be_v the_o root_n of_o all_o i_o have_v see_v lament_a and_o abhor_v the_o motion_n and_o stir_n of_o mind_n that_o way_n be_v suppress_v and_o dislodge_v i_o will_v never_o give_v way_n thereunto_o self-applauding_a self-seeking_a in_o matter_n of_o praise_n and_o honour_n before_o man_n i_o strive_v against_o i_o desire_v to_o be_v as_o sincere_a to_o another_o reputation_n as_o to_o my_o own_o i_o will_v not_o value_v other_o by_o their_o regard_n to_o i_o but_o by_o their_o true_a worth_n i_o will_v be_v content_v to_o be_v little_a in_o the_o eye_n of_o other_o this_o i_o unfeigned_o desire_v and_o endeavour_v and_o i_o hope_v that_o i_o have_v it_o in_o some_o good_a degree_n all_o my_o omission_n and_o negligence_n in_o the_o work_n of_o the_o ministry_n in_o preach_v in_o personal_n private_a application_n i_o bewail_v and_o hearty_o resolve_v upon_o more_o diligence_n and_o faithfulness_n enter_v not_o into_o judgement_n with_o thy_o
whatsoever_o good_a be_v do_v by_o they_o as_o in_o what_o be_v do_v by_o thyself_o and_o own_o it_o before_o men._n use_v not_o animosity_n and_o contention_n in_o any_o matter_n that_o may_v be_v bring_v to_o a_o good_a issue_n in_o the_o way_n of_o peace_n engage_v not_o hasty_o as_o a_o party_n in_o a_o difference_n between_o other_o but_o reserve_v thyself_o impartial_a and_o uningage_v that_o thou_o may_v moderate_v between_o they_o while_o thou_o lament_v thy_o weakness_n in_o some_o case_n and_o seek_v more_o strength_n be_v sure_a to_o use_v that_o great_a strength_n in_o all_o other_o case_n whereunto_o thou_o have_v attain_v and_o be_v not_o remiss_a or_o forgetful_a in_o any_o duty_n that_o be_v more_o facile_a to_o thou_o so_o shall_v thou_o have_v comfort_n in_o thy_o willing_a mind_n and_o honest_a care_n and_o do_v much_o towards_o the_o attainment_n of_o that_o which_o thou_o yet_o want_v and_o reach_v after_o in_o the_o time_n of_o prayer_n let_v no_o business_n divert_v thou_o from_o it_o that_o be_v not_o of_o present_a necessity_n when_o thou_o have_v a_o opportunity_n of_o speak_v a_o word_n for_o the_o good_a of_o another_o soul_n defer_v not_o the_o do_v of_o it_o till_o another_o time_n watch_v against_o all_o bitter_a and_o over-passionate_a speech_n against_o malignant_a opposer_n of_o the_o truth_n for_o meckness_n of_o spirit_n and_o behaviour_n be_v more_o according_a to_o christ_n than_o wrathful_a zeal_n be_v not_o transport_v with_o passion_n against_o those_o conformist_n who_o be_v more_o sober_a than_o many_o other_o yet_o manifest_a too_o little_a compassion_n to_o their_o suffer_a brethren_n for_o even_o in_o the_o regenerate_v there_o be_v a_o remainder_n of_o the_o spirit_n of_o envy_n partiality_n and_o selfishness_n and_o too_o much_o of_o wrath_n and_o bitterness_n and_o other_o part_n of_o the_o serpentine_a nature_n though_o in_o a_o mortify_v degree_n and_o we_o be_v to_o yield_v grain_n of_o allowance_n for_o the_o temptation_n of_o prejudice_n interest_n etc._n etc._n to_o which_o good_a man_n as_o well_o as_o other_o be_v obnoxious_a in_o thy_o zeal_n against_o the_o sin_n of_o other_o be_v mindful_a of_o thy_o own_o exceed_a sinfulness_n call_v to_o remembrance_n thy_o great_a offence_n which_o though_o they_o be_v unfeigned_o repent_v of_o give_v thou_o to_o understand_v what_o cause_n thou_o have_v to_o be_v meek_a and_o humble_a and_o patient_a towards_o all_o men._n watch_v against_o the_o motion_n of_o pride_n and_o hypocrisy_n in_o the_o presence_n of_o any_o person_n who_o favour_n and_o opinion_n thou_o much_o esteem_v what_o be_v man_n that_o thou_o shall_v pass_v to_o be_v judge_v by_o man_n judgement_n or_o seek_v applause_n from_o man_n be_v not_o discompose_v about_o some_o petty_a absurdity_n of_o behaviour_n or_o little_a indecorum_n or_o oversight_n for_o so_o to_o be_v be_v pusillanimity_n when_o thou_o have_v conceive_v a_o dislike_n of_o any_o person_n his_o way_n or_o action_n or_o do_v ill_o resent_v his_o carriage_n towards_o thou_o take_v heed_n thou_o do_v not_o take_v any_o secret_a pleasure_n in_o the_o foresight_n of_o evil_a come_n upon_o he_o or_o in_o hear_v or_o observe_v any_o such_o folly_n of_o he_o as_o tend_v to_o his_o reproach_n or_o ruin_n or_o notable_a damage_n if_o thou_o have_v fore-spoken_a the_o calamity_n or_o any_o evil_n that_o in_o reason_n be_v like_a to_o befall_v one_o who_o do_v unadvised_o manage_v himself_o and_o his_o affair_n take_v heed_n of_o wish_v or_o will_v that_o the_o evil_n shall_v come_v to_o pass_v lest_o thy_o judgement_n or_o foresight_n shall_v seem_v to_o be_v disparage_v yea_o take_v heed_n of_o any_o motion_n rise_v towards_o such_o a_o wish_n or_o will._n my_o own_o exceed_a faultiness_n engage_v i_o in_o see_v and_o hear_v the_o fault_n and_o folly_n of_o other_o to_o pity_v they_o rather_o than_o to_o rejoice_v or_o glory_v over_o they_o and_o to_o cover_v or_o lessen_v those_o fault_n rather_o than_o to_o aggravate_v or_o display_v they_o the_o mercy_n and_o forgiveness_n that_o i_o have_v find_v and_o hope_v for_o at_o the_o lord_n hand_n engage_v and_o dispose_v i_o to_o forgive_v injury_n and_o abuse_n do_v to_o i_o and_o i_o shall_v not_o think_v it_o much_o that_o i_o who_o be_o so_o sinful_a shall_v bear_v some_o contumely_n or_o abuse_n from_o men._n it_o be_v displease_v to_o i_o to_o hear_v the_o fault_n of_o other_o insist_v on_o whether_o they_o be_v matter_n of_o folly_n and_o inconsiderateness_n or_o of_o perverseness_n and_o malice_n but_o especial_o if_o the_o matter_n be_v not_o evident_a i_o find_v that_o petty_a damage_n and_o injury_n be_v apt_a to_o be_v vexatious_a especial_o in_o a_o matter_n the_o whole_a whereof_o be_v but_o little_a as_o in_o a_o little_o farm_n or_o live_n wherefore_o i_o endeavour_v that_o i_o be_v not_o surprise_v with_o a_o troublesome_a appearance_n and_o consider_v the_o moment_n of_o a_o thing_n how_o light_a it_o be_v abhor_v every_o thought_n word_n and_o deed_n which_o be_v contrary_a to_o love_n and_o tend_v to_o the_o hurt_a of_o other_o the_o more_o man_n wrong_v thou_o the_o more_o watchful_o maintain_v thy_o love_n towards_o they_o after_o thy_o public_a ministration_n in_o prayer_n and_o preach_v be_v not_o thoughtful_a or_o much_o concern_v how_o man_n like_o thy_o performance_n but_o be_v concern_v for_o this_o how_o acceptable_a it_o be_v to_o god_n and_o how_o effectual_a and_o successful_a to_o holy_a &_o save_a mean_n if_o god_n single_v i_o out_o for_o special_a great_a suffer_v i_o have_v no_o reason_n to_o judge_v amiss_o of_o it_o for_o such_o be_v the_o state_n of_o thing_n in_o the_o world_n to_o come_v that_o some_o individual_n must_v of_o necessity_n suffer_v for_o the_o good_a of_o the_o people_n and_o why_o not_o i_o as_o well_o as_o another_o god_n be_v my_o owner_n and_o he_o may_v do_v with_o i_o as_o with_o any_o other_o even_o as_o he_o please_v and_o he_o be_v my_o father_n and_o he_o will_v use_v i_o well_o and_o make_v i_o sufficient_a amends_o for_o all_o my_o suffer_v and_o i_o shall_v be_v no_o loser_n but_o a_o exceed_a gainer_n thereby_o in_o the_o end_n in_o this_o present_a state_n of_o trial_n it_o be_v requisite_a that_o there_o be_v a_o sufficient_a difficulty_n and_o hardship_n for_o all_o those_o that_o shall_v be_v save_v to_o grapple_v with_o for_o all_o our_o boast_n of_o freewill_n unless_o there_o be_v some_o heavy_a weight_n of_o suffering_n cast_v by_o providence_n into_o the_o balance_n to_o poise_v against_o our_o propension_n to_o follow_v lust_n and_o pleasure_n and_o worldly_a allurement_n we_o shall_v never_o serious_o set_v ourselves_o to_o the_o severe_a and_o self-denying_a duty_n which_o belong_v to_o true_a godliness_n to_o avoid_v inconvenience_n to_o thyself_o expose_v not_o any_o to_o danger_n who_o safety_n thou_o be_v bind_v to_o provide_v for_o in_o all_o accusation_n whether_o public_a or_o private_a when_o thou_o have_v make_v a_o sufficient_a defence_n enter_v not_o into_o needless_a matter_n for_o ostentation_n or_o such_o further_a vindication_n as_o be_v not_o necessary_a if_o thou_o stand_v in_o a_o slippery_a place_n but_o lie_v at_o a_o close_a guard_n lest_o thou_o be_v entangle_v or_o in_o some_o point_n circumvent_v i_o will_v never_o witting_o and_o wilful_o do_v amiss_o by_o commission_n or_o omission_n in_o a_o great_a or_o lesser_a matter_n because_o i_o shall_v too_o often_o do_v amiss_o at_o least_o in_o small_a matter_n through_o ignorance_n or_o inadvertency_n or_o surprisal_n of_o passion_n do_v what_o i_o can_v watch_v every_o opportunity_n to_o put_v in_o a_o savoury_a word_n for_o the_o good_a of_o a_o soul_n with_o who_o thou_o have_v occasion_n of_o converse_n remember_v thou_o have_v nothing_o of_o thou_o own_o but_o all_o be_v the_o lord_n and_o according_o use_v all_o that_o thou_o have_v to_o no_o carnal_a interest_n but_o to_o serve_v he_o as_o be_v whole_o devote_v to_o he_o be_v as_o serious_a and_o hearty_a in_o thy_o prayer_n to_o god_n for_o the_o concern_v of_o other_o as_o for_o thy_o own_o watch_v against_o selfishness_n lest_o it_o work_v unto_o great_a uncharitableness_n when_o thou_o have_v evidence_n of_o thy_o sincerity_n which_o can_v in_o reason_n be_v gainsay_v hold_v to_o they_o and_o take_v comfort_n in_o they_o yet_o still_o endeavour_v by_o review_n and_o further_a search_n to_o clear_v it_o more_o and_o more_o we_o keep_v our_o evidence_n by_o keep_v our_o grace_n in_o their_o lively_a exercise_n fetch_v thy_o comfort_n from_o heaven_n and_o not_o from_o pleasure_n or_o hope_n here_o below_o do_v not_o overvalue_v any_o worth_n that_o be_v in_o thyself_o but_o think_v it_o rather_o less_o than_o more_o than_o it_o be_v indeed_o if_o any_o slight_v thou_o be_v neither_o deject_v nor_o provoke_v