as the World It is the highest degree of Friendship the strictest cord of Amity and this maketh every breach and jar by so much the more culpable Learne therefore to beare with infirmities and passe by each others saylings The antients in their Maritall Hieroglyphicks used to paint Mercury standing by Venus to signifie that by faire language and sweet entreaties the mindes of each other should be united Love is not more full of passion when it is wholly blinde than it is of discretion when it will sometimes winke This will cover a multitude of sinnes 1 Pet. 4.8 particular 4 4ly A Helpe she must be in her Family being not onely a Wife but an Housewife not a Field-wife like Dinah nor a Street wife like Thamar nor a Window-wife like Jezebel but an Housewife Wherefore Phidias when he should draw a Woman painted her sitting under a Snailes shell signifying that in her life she should imitate that little Creature that carrieth the house upon the back of it And as such you may reade her description at large Prov. 31. from the 13. to the 28. Prov. 31.13,14,15,16 c. As in the Heavens there are two Lights the greater to rule the Day the lesser to rule the Night so here on the Earth there is the Man the greater light to rule the Publick the Woman the lesser light to take care of domesticall affaires Thus Marriage is called conjugium from jugum a yoke when those that are joyned together have a reciprocall and relative interest in each others actions both promoting the same designe in their severall capacities Where cattell are yoked together should one draw and the other stand still much more if the one pull forward and the other hale backward they would but tire each other both must put to their strength proportionably and so here 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Aristot Polit. l. 3. c. 4. the yoke-fellows have each their taske and burthen the Man must doe his part by providing industriously the Woman must doe her part by preserving discreetly the Man must doe his part not neglecting carelesly the Woman must doe her part not wasting prodigally finally the Man must doe his part abroad the Woman must doe her part at home the Man must doe his part by getting the Woman must doe her part by saving I question not but you are acquainted with your particular duties this is not a place to reade a Lecture of Oeconomicks I passe on particular 5 5ly And lastly to include all A Help she must be in all those duties which in her Contract she hath engaged for in the presence of God and Men. By solemne protestation she layeth upon her selfe an obligation to performe them and it will be required at her hands non tam respiciendum cui juramus quà m per quem juramus Lomb. 3. sent distinct 39. you stand bound by promise to the most High and to him shall the vow be performed The wise man telleth you Eccles 5.5 Better it is that thou shouldst not vow then that thou shouldst vow and not pay Eccles 5.5 Forget not thy engagements and remember to observe them Quà m gravia vincula sunt vota It is Ambrose's exclamation major est contractus fidei quà m pecuniae Amb. l. 9. in Lucam ad cap. 20. You are mistaken that look upon the Matrimoniall vowes onely as things of custome and formality know the Heavens heare and the Earth hearkneth to them and if they are broken shall testifie against you for dissembling with the Almighty and deluding of his Creature by making promises which you forget and falsifie application 1 That I may draw to a conclusion of this particular Doth God call the Woman here an Help Then this might serve in the first place to correct the unlawful vanity of such that imploy their wits to vilifie and disparage them that stuffe their discourses with a Catalogue of their weaknesses scarce ever mentioning them without a Satyr whose best language is to give them Cato's periphrasis that they are necessary evills condemning the frame of all for the faults of some as if it were a consequence that because some are bad therefore none are good Is this their thanks to their Maker to raile at the worke of his hands But what Tertullian said of Hereticks I may say here detegere est refutare Many Daughters have done vertuously Tertul. Praescript Prov. 31.29 application 2 2ly Is Woman an Help to Man The Wife an Help to the Husband Then this may teach Husbands to be Helps to them againe It is the Poets description of an Husband 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Homer he is to his Wife Father Mother Brother and great reason for it unlesse the state of Mariage should be no better than the condition of an Orphan for she that leaveth all these relations for him will be a great loser if she doe not finde them all translated in him I am afraid Medea's complaint in Euripides may be taken up by too many Wives 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 c. Euripides Med. Ambrose hath almost translated it Ambros Exhort ad Virgines Virgins are with their owne Money sold to misery and their owne portion is the too deare price of a servile subjection True it is the Husband is the * 1 Cor 11.3 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Phil. in Gen. 3.12 head of his Wife and so hath dominion over her but it is such as the Soul hath over the Body to take care for it and help it Their help is mutuall the Soule furnisheth the Body with light and understanding the Body requiteth the Soul with hands and feet and so it must be here she that hath parted with all her helps for thee she that hath imparted all her help to thee hath good reason to expect and meet with all help from thee As the Earth sendeth up all its vapours and proper emissions at the command of the Sunne and yet requireth them againe to refresh her owne need and they are deposited between them both in the bosome of a cloud as a common receptacle that as they have ascended to coole his flames so they may descend to make her fruitfull so are the proprieties of a Wife to be disposed of by her Husband they serve the interest of both while they serve the necessities of either Now she is a part of thy selfe corporis dimidium tui Gen. 2.23 bone of thy bones and flesh of thy flesh and therefore nourish her and cherish her It is the Apostles consequence Eph. 5.28,29 Ephes 5.28,29 application 3 3ly Is Woman to be an Help to Man Then let this teach you all whom it may concerne the end of your conjugall condition I may say in another sense then Verus meant it uxor dignitatis non voluptatis nomen Coel. Rhod. Aut. lect l. 18. c. 13. Wife is not a name of Pleasure but of Honour you are to be Helps to those to whom