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Word A Word B Word C Word D Occurrence Frequency Band MI MI Band Prominent
heart_n love_n love_v shed_v 3,733 5 10.1521 5 true
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ID Title Author Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication) STC Words Pages
A46653 Death unstung a sermon preached at the funeral of Thomas Mowsley, an apothecary, who died July, 1669 : with a brief narrative of his life and death : also the manner of Gods dealings with him before and after his conversion : drawn up by his own hand and published / by James Janeway ... Janeway, James, 1636?-1674. 1669 (1669) Wing J459; ESTC R11356 73,896 158

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the_o latter_a end_n of_o my_o book_n of_o acquaintance_n with_o god_n which_o be_v now_o reprint_v at_o present_a my_o advice_n shall_v be_v that_o you_o will_v follow_v they_o who_o through_o faith_n and_o patience_n be_v the_o inheriter_n of_o the_o promise_n and_o propose_v to_o yourselves_o the_o example_n of_o the_o most_o eminent_a christian_n such_o as_o this_o precious_a young_a man_n who_o funeral_n rite_n we_o be_v now_o solemnize_n and_o because_o example_n be_v very_a cogent_n and_o affect_v most_o more_o than_o precept_n i_o shall_v present_v you_o with_o a_o account_n of_o some_o of_o this_o holy_a young_a man_n practice_n and_o experience_n take_v they_o therefore_o as_o i_o have_v gather_v they_o by_o my_o own_o experience_n and_o intimate_v knowledge_n of_o he_o and_o as_o i_o have_v collect_v they_o out_o of_o many_o sheet_n of_o his_o own_o writing_n but_o let_v it_o not_o be_v think_v i_o beseech_v you_o that_o out_o of_o custom_n or_o flattery_n i_o speak_v such_o 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craz●_n body_n that_o need_v to_o be_v prop_v up_o by_o a●●_n have_v now_o no_o need_n of_o such_o help_n the_o lame_a sha●●_n leap_v the_o blind_a see_v the_o weak_a shall_v be_v strong_a th●_n crooked_a strait_n they_o which_o be_v in_o death_n oft_o sha●●_n be_v never_o in_o danger_n o_o happy_a alteration_n th●_n grave_a will_v refine_v and_o alter_v our_o body_n and_o the●_n shall_v there_o bury_v all_o imperfection_n and_o this_o mort●_n shall_v put_v on_o immortality_n and_o this_o corruptible_a incorruption_n there_o the_o weary_a shall_v be_v at_o rest_n esa_n 61.3_o &_o 33.24_o &_o 60.18_o job_n 3.17_o 5._o the_o blessedness_n of_o the_o decease_a saint_n consi_v in_o their_o perfect_a freedom_n from_o all_o want_n and_o fear_v of_o want_n here_o they_o have_v their_o daily_a want_n and_o in_o the_o sweat_n of_o their_o brow_n they_o must_v eat_v their_o bread_n the_o world_n in_o its_o best_a estate_n be_v make_v up_o of_o vanity_n and_o trouble_n how_o much_o need_n have_v we_o of_o the_o help_n of_o our_o fellow-creature_n we_o can_v live_v without_o the_o use_n of_o their_o body_n and_o life_n we_o want_v their_o service_n to_o till_o our_o ground_n and_o to_o carry_v our_o weak_a body_n that_o can_v sometime_o scarce_o go_v under_o their_o own_o burden_n what_o shift_n can_v we_o make_v if_o the_o influence_n of_o the_o sun_n moon_n and_o star_n be_v suspend_v what_o lamentable_a complaint_n shall_v we_o make_v if_o god_n shall_v seal_v up_o the_o fountain_n of_o water_n how_o soon_o shall_v we_o faint_v if_o he_o shall_v make_v the_o heaven_n as_o iron_n and_o the_o earth_n as_o brass_n what_o element_n can_v we_o want_v what_o creature_n can_v we_o well_o spare_v but_o the_o time_n be_v come_v that_o day_n will_v short_o begin_v who_o brightness_n will_v make_v the_o sun_n dark_a and_o the_o moon_n to_o disappear_v and_o all_o the_o star_n to_o leave_v their_o sphere_n as_o useless_a o_o unbelief_n how_o miserable_o do_v thou_o rob_v we_o of_o the_o comfort_n which_o the_o very_a fore-thought_n of_o that_o hour_n may_v bring_v in_o dwell_v o_o my_o tremble_a soul_n upon_o the_o meditation_n of_o these_o thing_n be_v there_o no_o truth_n nor_o weight_n in_o ●hose_v scripture_n es_fw-ge 60.19_o es_fw-ge 21.29_o give_v in_o thy_o answer_n why_o then_o be_v thou_o cast_v down_o o_o my_o soul_n and_o why_o be_v thou_o disquiet_v within_o i_o wait_v upon_o the_o lord_n and_o be_v of_o good_a courage_n wait_v i_o say_v upon_o the_o lord_n 6._o this_o happy_a man_n shall_v be_v quite_o free_v of_o whatsoever_o may_v argue_v a_o imperfect_a state_n some_o of_o those_o very_a grace_n that_o be_v now_o so_o useful_a and_o necessary_a when_o their_o work_n be_v do_v shall_v be_v lay_v aside_o as_o useless_a i_o mean_v faith_n hope_n patience_n desire_n all_o which_o speak_v something_o of_o imperfection_n shall_v then_o be_v swallow_v up_o of_o love_n they_o now_o help_v to_o lead_v the_o soul_n out_o of_o egypt_n conduct_v through_o the_o red_a sea_n and_o wilderness_n and_o send_v spice_n into_o canaan_n and_o bring_v good_a tiding_n out_o of_o that_o land_n they_o see_v sihon_n og_n and_o amaleck_n discomfit_v and_o their_o power_n break_v they_o go_v to_o the_o border_n of_o the_o promise_a land_n nay_o they_o get_v up_o to_o pisga_n and_o upon_o mount_n nebo_n there_o they_o bid_v the_o soul_n farewell_n i'faith_o like_o a_o skilful_a pilot_n keep_v close_o to_o the_o ship_n till_o it_o see_v it_o out_o of_o danger_n i'faith_o like_o loyal_a barzillai_n bring_v in_o abundant_a provision_n for_o the_o soul_n in_o all_o its_o strait_n and_o come_v with_o it_o to_o the_o bank_n of_o jordan_n to_o the_o brink_n o●_n eternity_n but_o there_o there_o it_o take_v its_o final_a leave_n and_o send_v over_o young_a chimham_n to_o wait_v upon_o the_o king_n at_o jerusalem_n it_o send_v love_v over_o into_o heaven_n t●_n dwell_v there_o with_o the_o lord_n for_o ever_o o_o bless_a state_n when_o faith_n shall_v be_v swallow_v up_o of_o sight_n here_o we_o live_v by_o faith_n and_o not_o by_o sense_n or_o sight_n in_o glory_n we_o shall_v live_v by_o sense_n and_o sight_n and_o not_o by_o faith_n the_o shadow_n shall_v vanish_v when_o the_o substance_n be_v come_v hope_v patience_n desire_n and_o fear_n shall_v all_o pass_v away_o and_o be_v swallow_v up_o with_o a_o eternal_a fruition_n possession_n and_o security_n happy_a be_v the_o people_n that_o be_v in_o such_o a_o case_n their_o cloud_n be_v quite_o blow_v over_o they_o need_v neither_o wind_n or_o sail_n now_o they_o be_v safe_a land_v what_o think_v you_o now_o of_o a_o child_n of_o god_n be_v it_o worth_a the_o while_n to_o be_v religious_a be_v holiness_n a_o folly_n now_o and_o yet_o this_o be_v not_o all_o come_v a_o little_a further_o and_o i_o will_v show_v you_o great_a thing_n still_o all_o this_o be_v bu●_n the_o privative_a part_n of_o their_o happiness_n i_o come_v now_o to_o touch_v a_o little_a upon_o the_o positive_a part_n but_o what_o a_o ocean_n be_o i_o now_o launch_v into_o who_o can_v tell_v all_o the_o privilege_n of_o a_o citizen_n of_o zion_n what_o pen_n can_v describe_v the_o honour_n and_o dignity_n of_o the_o son_n of_o god_n but_o that_o i_o may_v heighten_v your_o spirit_n and_o a_o little_a antedate_v your_o comfort_n i_o shall_v in_o the_o next_o place_n show_v something_o of_o the_o positive_a part_n 2._o the_o blessedness_n of_o those_o which_o die_v in_o the_o lord_n consist_v positive_o first_o in_o this_o that_o they_o shall_v enter_v into_o the_o society_n of_o the_o angel_n they_o shall_v leave_v any_o long_o converse_v with_o mortal_n and_o instead_o of_o weep_a friend_n see_v themselves_o compass_v with_o sing_v angel_n how_o do_v you_o think_v that_o lazarus_n be_v affect_v who_o instead_o of_o beggar_n crippel_n and_o dog_n have_v a_o guard_n of_o angel_n wait_v upon_o he_o what_o a_o ecstasy_n of_o joy_n be_v he_o surprise_v with_o luk._n 16.22_o this_o honour_n have_v all_o the_o saint_n we_o think_v the_o sight_n of_o a_o king_n the_o look_n of_o a_o prince_n the_o company_n of_o a_o lord_n a_o great_a matter_n what_o be_v they_o it_o compare_v with_o the_o least_o of_o the_o captain_n of_o the_o lord_n host_n how_o vast_a be_v the_o difference_n between_o flesh_n and_o spirit_n and_o yet_o this_o favour_n the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o confer_v upon_o the_o least_o of_o his_o child_n and_o how_o glad_a be_v the_o angel_n themselves_o of_o the_o society_n of_o the_o poor_a saint_n they_o be_v glad_a even_o here_o to_o be_v do_v office_n of_o love_n for_o they_o many_o a_o danger_n they_o deliver_v they_o from_o many_o a_o mercy_n they_o convey_v from_o their_o father_n to_o they_o but_o these_o earthly_a body_n be_v scarce_o capable_a of_o communication_n with_o such_o noble_a and_o spiritual_a creature_n but_o at_o death_n they_o shall_v know_v their_o old_a friend_n and_o fellow-servant_n and_o bless_v god_n with_o they_o and_o for_o they_o for_o ever_o heb._n 12.22_o and_o these_o chariot_n and_o horseman_n of_o israel_n shall_v carry_v up_o joseph_n to_o his_o father_n house_n and_o there_o the_o son_n of_o god_n shall_v shout_v for_o joy_n time_n be_v the_o sight_n of_o a_o angel_n will_v make_v a_o saint_n tremble_v but_o than_o it_o shall_v make_v they_o to_o triumph_n and_o what_o story_n will_v they_o tell_v they_o of_o the_o providence_n of_o god_n towards_o they_o and_o join_v with_o they_o in_o the_o high_a praise_n of_o his_o goodness_n and_o love_n but_o all_o this_o be_v but_o little_a to_o what_o follow_v 2._o at_o death_n the_o soul_n of_o believer_n be_v make_v perfect_a in_o holiness_n how_o will_v they_o in_o a_o moment_n see_v themselves_o as_o white_a as_o snow_n how_o glorious_a shall_v the_o king_n daughter_n be_v when_o her_o beauty_n be_v perfect_a how_o love_o will_v she_o look_v when_o she_o be_v clad_v with_o innocent_a purity_n how_o excellent_a when_o her_o royal_a husband_n the_o lord_n christ_n shall_v be_v infinite_o take_v with_o she_o will_v he_o not_o then_o say_v thou_o be_v all_o fair_a my_o love_n there_o be_v no_o spot_n in_o thou_o come_v with_o i_o from_o lebanon_n my_o spouse_n with_o i_o from_o lebanon_n from_o the_o top_n of_o amana_n from_o the_o top_n of_o shenir_fw-fr and_o hermon_n from_o the_o lion_n den_n from_o the_o mountain_n of_o leopard_n thou_o have_v ravish_v my_o heart_n my_o sister_n my_o spouse_n thou_o with_o one_o chain_n of_o thy_o neck_n how_o fair_a be_v thy_o love_n my_o sister_n my_o spouse_n etc._n etc._n cant._n 4.7_o 8_o 9_o 10._o if_o the_o lord_n see_v so_o much_o beauty_n here_o in_o his_o church_n what_o will_v he_o do_v hereafter_o when_o he_o shall_v have_v wash_v away_o all_o her_o
defilement_n and_o take_v out_o her_o stain_n and_o have_v deck_v she_o with_o his_o jewel_n and_o put_v on_o her_o wedding_n garment_n that_o day_n be_v come_v o_o my_o soul_n when_o will_v the_o shadow_n flee_v away_o when_o will_v day_n and_o night_n be_v all_o at_o a_o end_n when_o will_v time_n be_v spend_v when_o shall_v the_o curtain_n be_v draw_v o_o that_o that_o be_v the_o place_n thou_o shall_v then_o love_v that_o precious_a jesus_n with_o a_o seraphic_a and_o angel-like_o love_n thou_o will_v then_o as_o much_o delight_n and_o rejoice_v in_o he_o as_o abraham_n david_n and_o paul_n do_v thy_o drowsy_a soul_n shall_v be_v as_o nimble_a and_o active_a in_o the_o service_n of_o thy_o great_a maker_n as_o enoch_n and_o elias_n thou_o shall_v praise_v he_o day_n and_o night_n and_o be_v no_o more_o weary_a than_o the_o angel_n themselves_o thou_o shall_v perfect_o understand_v the_o will_n of_o god_n and_o ready_o obey_v it_o thou_o shall_v be_v holy_a as_o god_n be_v holy_a and_o what_o will_v you_o now_o give_v for_o such_o a_o frame_n how_o glad_a will_v you_o be_v to_o feel_v a_o connaturality_n to_o divine_a employment_n how_o happy_a will_v you_o think_v yourselves_o if_o your_o heart_n be_v always_o as_o god_n will_v have_v it_o be_v it_o not_o for_o this_o that_o you_o fast_o and_o pray_v be_v it_o not_o for_o this_o that_o you_o hear_v read_v and_o meditate_v be_v not_o this_o the_o end_n of_o sacrament_n well_o be_v of_o good_a cheer_n in_o mount_n zion_n there_o shall_v be_v deliverance_n and_o holiness_n obed._n 17._o and_o be_v all_o this_o nothing_o seem_v it_o still_o a_o small_a privilege_n to_o be_v a_o child_n of_o god_n and_o like_o our_o father_n who_o that_o understand_v this_o will_v not_o bid_v death_n welcome_a and_o say_v now_o grave_a do_v thy_o worst_a ask_v paul_n and_o he_o will_v tell_v you_o that_o upon_o this_o account_n he_o groan_v inquire_v of_o david_n and_o he_o will_v let_v you_o understand_v that_o he_o never_o expect_v satisfaction_n till_o he_o awake_a with_o god_n likeness_n psal_n 17._o 3._o another_o thing_n wherein_o the_o blessedness_n of_o a_o christian_a at_o death_n lie_v be_v this_o the_o sight_n of_o christ_n what_o can_v be_v more_o desire_v by_o a_o child_n of_o god_n than_o to_o behold_v and_o enjoy_v he_o by_o who_o all_o the_o mercy_n we_o have_v and_o all_o that_o we_o expect_v slow_a in_o to_o we_o eph._n 1.11_o that_o good_a old_a saint_n luk._n 2.30_o think_v it_o a_o heaven_n upon_o earth_n to_o see_v he_o though_o his_o majesty_n be_v veil_v and_o the_o brightness_n of_o his_o glory_n wrap_v up_o and_o cover_v by_o his_o humanity_n he_o do_v sing_v a_o requiem_n to_o his_o soul_n and_o say_v now_o let_v thy_o servant_n depart_v in_o peace_n for_o my_o eye_n have_v see_v thy_o salvation_n how_o be_v peter_n james_n and_o john_n affect_v at_o his_o transfiguration_n mat._n 17_o 2._o what_o a_o admirable_a frame_n do_v the_o spouse_n seem_v to_o be_v in_o when_o she_o see_v only_o the_o shadow_n and_o backpart_n of_o this_o belove_a one_o cant._n 5.16_o she_o can_v tell_v when_o to_o have_v do_v commend_v of_o he_o but_o all_o this_o be_v but_o a_o small_a thing_n compare_v to_o the_o sight_n which_o they_o shall_v see_v when_o their_o grace_n shall_v be_v complete_a and_o their_o soul_n like_o he_o and_o then_o shall_v they_o behold_v the_o king_n in_o his_o beauty_n no_o long_o the_o contempt_n and_o scorn_n of_o the_o world_n no_o long_o in_o poverty_n and_o want_n no_o long_o crucify_v and_o reject_v but_o jesus_n the_o express_a image_n of_o his_o father_n and_o the_o brightness_n of_o his_o glory_n accompany_v with_o million_o of_o angel_n all_o at_o his_o command_n and_o yet_o for_o all_o this_o cast_v a_o gracious_a eye_n upon_o they_o then_o shall_v the_o soul_n behold_v he_o face_n to_o face_n who_o do_v and_o suffer_v such_o wonderful_a thing_n for_o it_o it_o be_v he_o that_o come_v out_o of_o his_o father_n bosom_n it_o be_v he_o that_o step_v out_o of_o his_o throne_n and_o put_v off_o his_o robe_n that_o come_v leap_v over_o the_o mountain_n and_o skip_v over_o the_o hill_n run_v through_o a_o thousand_o difficulty_n that_o he_o may_v pluck_v thou_o out_o of_o thy_o misery_n and_o deliver_v thou_o out_o of_o the_o paw_n of_o the_o lion_n and_o the_o bear_n that_o he_o may_v redeem_v thou_o from_o the_o power_n of_o sin_n death_n and_o hell_n how_o will_v the_o heaven_n echo_n with_o song_n of_o joy_n when_o the_o bride_n the_o lamb_n wife_n shall_v come_v to_o dwell_v with_o her_o husband_n for_o ever_o isay_n 33.17_o christ_n be_v the_o desire_n of_o nation_n the_o joy_n of_o angel_n the_o delight_n of_o the_o father_n and_o he_o in_o who_o he_o be_v well_o please_v what_o solace_n then_o must_v that_o soul_n be_v fill_v with_o that_o have_v the_o possession_n of_o he_o to_o all_o eternity_n be_v not_o his_o love_n better_o than_o wine_n and_o a_o look_n of_o his_o countenance_n to_o be_v prefer_v before_o corn_n and_o oil_n be_v not_o his_o kindness_n to_o be_v value_v above_o life_n itself_o what_o mean_v thou_o then_o o_o my_o soul_n that_o thou_o do_v so_o dread_a his_o come_n why_o be_v thou_o so_o loath_a to_o be_v with_o he_o why_o be_v thou_o afraid_a of_o the_o enjoyment_n of_o he_o will_v thy_o redeemer_n make_v thou_o a_o slave_n have_v heaven_n change_v his_o nature_n and_o make_v he_o less_o desirable_a will_v thy_o saviour_n make_v thou_o miserable_a awake_v then_o o_o you_o saint_n and_o stand_v a_o tiptoe_n wait_v watch_n and_o long_o till_o thou_o see_v he_o who_o alone_o can_v fill_v thy_o soul_n fight_v strive_v and_o run_v till_o you_o enjoy_v one_o smile_n of_o he_o one_o look_n of_o his_o love_n be_v worth_a the_o pleasure_n of_o ten_o world_n where_o be_v thy_o heart_n where_o be_v thy_o desire_n what_o be_v become_v of_o thy_o love_n if_o christ_n do_v not_o affect_v draw_v and_o fire_n thou_o what_o will_n but_o when_o thou_o shall_v see_v christ_n indeed_o his_o very_a look_n will_v so_o warm_v thy_o soul_n that_o thou_o shall_v in_o a_o moment_n feel_v a_o divine_a flame_n which_o shall_v never_o be_v extinguish_v as_o long_o as_o christ_n the_o object_n of_o thy_o love_n shall_v live_v the_o sight_n of_o christ_n will_v put_v new_a life_n into_o thy_o soul_n and_o make_v thy_o love_n and_o joy_n fresh_a for_o ever_o this_o be_v he_o o_o my_o soul_n that_o be_v wound_v that_o thou_o may_v be_v heal_v this_o be_v he_o who_o be_v crown_v with_o thorn_n that_o thou_o may_v be_v crown_v with_o glory_n this_o this_o be_v he_o that_o die_v that_o thou_o may_v live_v be_v not_o all_o the_o glory_n of_o heaven_n wrap_v up_o in_o he_o be_v not_o the_o treasure_n of_o divine_a kindness_n which_o be_v sometime_o hide_v in_o he_o now_o open_v tell_v i_o now_o o_o my_o soul_n be_v there_o any_o in_o two_o world_n comparable_a to_o he_o be_v not_o that_o he_o that_o shelter_v thou_o from_o the_o storm_n of_o god_n wrath_n be_v not_o that_o precious_a body_n the_o 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do_v for_o thou_o what_o shall_v i_o say_v unto_o thou_o i_o can_v be_v content_v that_o these_o line_n be_v write_v with_o my_o very_a heart_n blood_n so_o that_o they_o may_v affect_v thou_o o_o i_o have_v rather_o die_v than_o receive_v another_o such_o letter_n from_o you_o i_o can_v not_o relish_v it_o it_o be_v bitter_a i_o can_v not_o see_v the_o name_n of_o dear_a jesus_n in_o it_o how_o can_v i_o think_v of_o your_o blind_a superstition_n and_o not_o mourn_v and_o lament_v over_o a_o dead_a soul_n you_o say_v you_o be_v sorry_a and_o you_o be_v trouble_v what_o be_v the_o matter_n be_v you_o sorry_a that_o i_o shall_v concern_v myself_o about_o my_o soul_n and_o about_o you_o you_o will_v not_o trouble_v yourself_o about_o these_o thing_n now_o if_o not_o now_o i_o pray_v when_o will_v you_o at_o the_o hour_n of_o death_n at_o the_o day_n o●_n judgement_n o_o then_o it_o will_v be_v too_o late_a o_o now_o o●_n never_o delay_n be_v dangerous_a o_o eternity_n eternity_n o_o 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be_v in_o a_o ecstasy_n of_o comfort_n and_o feel_v what_o those_o joy_n unspeakable_a in_o believe_v mean_v in_o former_a time_n he_o have_v great_a manifestation_n of_o god_n love_n but_o never_o any_o break_v into_o his_o soul_n with_o such_o power_n and_o clear_a evidence_n as_o then_o he_o have_v as_o it_o be_v a_o prospect_n of_o glory_n and_o some_o foretaste_n of_o that_o happiness_n that_o be_v prepare_v for_o he_o before_o the_o foundation_n of_o the_o world_n and_o o_o how_o do_v his_o heart_n even_o leap_v within_o he_o to_o think_v that_o within_o a_o little_a while_o he_o shall_v full_o and_o eternal_o enjoy_v what_o he_o now_o have_v a_o little_a glimpse_n of_o upon_o monday_n i_o go_v to_o visit_v he_o and_o find_v he_o in_o a_o very_a sweet_a frame_n so_o take_v up_o with_o heaven_n that_o he_o do_v even_o wonder_n at_o himself_o i_o be_o say_v he_o so_o overcome_v with_o the_o love_n of_o christ_n and_o the_o glory_n of_o heaven_n that_o all_o manner_n of_o fear_n 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a_o die_a sweat_n and_o the_o last_o word_n that_o i_o hear_v he_o speak_v be_v glory_n glory_n after_o that_o he_o continue_v in_o very_o great_a agony_n and_o his_o pang_n be_v strong_a till_o about_o 11_o of_o the_o clock_n than_o he_o sleep_v in_o jesus_n be_v exceed_o lament_v by_o the_o young_a man_n of_o his_o society_n many_o of_o which_o be_v about_o he_o finis_fw-la a_o account_n of_o god_n deal_n with_o this_o young_a man_n before_z and_o at_o his_o conversion_n with_o some_o remark_n upon_o the_o same_o as_o it_o be_v deliver_v to_o i_o under_o his_o own_o hand_n after_o i_o have_v discourse_v with_o he_o by_o way_n of_o dialogue_n between_o a_o minister_n and_o himself_o minister_n what_o ought_v to_o be_v the_o great_a care_n and_o duty_n of_o every_o profess_v christian_a in_o these_o our_o day_n convert_n pray_v what_o may_v be_v the_o reason_n of_o this_o your_o question_n min._n i_o have_v very_o many_o reason_n but_o one_o be_v this_o because_o it_o be_v daily_o 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more_o or_o less_o all_o have_v have_v turn_v to_o a_o true_a conversion_n and_o have_v his_o pang_n of_o sorrow_n for_o sin_n but_o bring_v forth_o regeneration_n then_o sure_o he_o will_v have_v be_v in_o such_o a_o estate_n from_o which_o all_o the_o malice_n of_o the_o power_n of_o darkness_n can_v not_o have_v draw_v he_o min._n the_o answer_n do_v somewhat_o savour_n of_o goodness_n and_o that_o you_o understand_v with_o your_o heart_n what_o you_o express_v with_o the_o tongue_n conversion_n or_o regeneration_n be_v a_o mighty_a work_n and_o on_o whosoever_o it_o be_v true_o wrought_v
that_o person_n can_v say_v somewhat_o more_o or_o less_o concern_v the_o nature_n of_o it_o and_o how_o it_o be_v wrought_v in_o his_o soul_n if_o the_o lord_n have_v in_o any_o measure_n reveal_v himself_o to_o you_o in_o this_o way_n let_v i_o entreat_v you_o both_o for_o your_o own_o soul_n good_a and_o perhaps_o other_o soul_n good_a but_o chief_o that_o the_o lord_n may_v thereby_o be_v glorify_v to_o let_v i_o know_v the_o time_n and_o manner_n of_o his_o draw_v you_o to_o himself_o by_o his_o unspeakable_a love_n and_o mercy_n conu._n oh_o blessed_n be_v god_n that_o he_o have_v open_v the_o heart_n of_o his_o faithful_a minister_n to_o demand_v such_o a_o matter_n of_o such_o a_o poor_a wretch_n as_o i_o be_o oh_o what_o be_o i_o that_o i_o shall_v be_v examine_v instruct_v and_o confirm_v about_o the_o matter_n of_o my_o eternal_a precious_a and_o never_o die_a soul_n oh_o that_o the_o lord_n will_v so_o enable_v i_o in_o this_o great_a work_n that_o i_o may_v not_o be_v 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you_o but_o sure_o be_v convince_v of_o the_o bless_a condition_n of_o the_o godly_a you_o can_v not_o but_o sometime_o wish_v yourself_o in_o their_o condition_n how_o do_v you_o carry_v yourself_o under_o this_o do_v you_o resolve_v that_o you_o will_v never_o be_v as_o they_o be_v conu._n true_o many_o time_n i_o will_v have_v be_v glad_a to_o have_v be_v in_o their_o condition_n but_o i_o be_v so_o glue_v to_o the_o world_n and_o my_o sin_n that_o i_o can_v not_o endure_v to_o think_v of_o leave_v they_o yet_o to_o my_o best_a remembrance_n i_o never_o resolve_v that_o if_o i_o shall_v live_v never_o so_o long_o i_o will_v not_o repent_v but_o that_o after_o i_o have_v get_v a_o great_a estate_n in_o the_o world_n and_o be_v grow_v old_a and_o be_v as_o it_o be_v uncapable_a of_o take_v any_o more_o delight_n in_o these_o thing_n below_o that_o then_o i_o will_v have_v set_v out_o towards_o heaven_n and_o oh_o i_o can_v but_o think_v and_o i_o desire_v with_o fear_n and_o tremble_a to_o think_v what_o a_o loathsome_a sacrifice_n i_o shall_v then_o have_v be_v even_o stink_v in_o god_n nostril_n when_o i_o have_v give_v the_o marrow_n and_o fatness_n and_o strength_n of_o my_o body_n to_o the_o devil_n then_o i_o shall_v have_v have_v just_a cause_n to_o fear_v the_o lord_n will_v have_v bury_v i_o out_o of_o his_o sight_n oh_o i_o say_v i_o stay_v in_o the_o devil_n service_n so_o long_o that_o i_o smell_v so_o of_o fire_n and_o brimstone_n i_o mean_v of_o sin_n that_o have_v not_o the_o body_n of_o a_o crucify_a advocate_n jesus_n christ_n as_o a_o veil_n stand_v between_o the_o justice_n of_o god_n and_o my_o guilty_a soul_n certain_o he_o will_v soon_o have_v draw_v out_o a_o bill_n of_o indictment_n against_o i_o and_o have_v send_v i_o away_o with_o a_o go_v you_o curse_v min._n by_o what_o you_o have_v say_v i_o perceive_v you_o lay_v under_o conviction_n for_o about_o 6_o year_n with_o very_o little_a grief_n or_o sorrow_n for_o sin_n but_o although_o you_o know_v what_o you_o be_v to_o do_v yet_o you_o do_v not_o do_v what_o you_o do_v know_v i_o will_v ask_v you_o but_o one_o '_o question_v more_o before_o i_o come_v to_o the_o chief_a point_n in_o hand_n and_o that_o be_v this_o what_o duty_n you_o engage_v in_o in_o this_o time_n and_o how_o you_o carry_v yourself_o under_o they_o conu._n now_o even_o now_o i_o begin_v to_o revel●_n from_o my_o promise_n but_o that_o i_o may_v if_o possible_o debase_v myself_o below_o the_o vile_a creature_n in_o the_o world_n i_o will_v declare_v something_o and_o enough_o to_o make_v your_o very_a hair_n to_o sta●●_n a_o end_n and_z oh_o that_o the_o lord_n will_v 〈◊〉_d make_v i_o so_o reflect_v upon_o myself_o th●_n 〈◊〉_d may_v abhor_v my_o wretched_a self_n in_o d●st_n 〈◊〉_d ash_n for_o oh_o lord_n if_o this_o w●●●_n 〈◊〉_d what_o will_n for_o the_o great_a part_n of_o 〈…〉_o 06_o year_n i_o live_v without_o prayer_n and_o 〈…〉_o the_o scripture_n but_o seldom_o misse●●_n 〈…〉_o ●y_a reason_n 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you_o that_o for_o a_o little_a time_n about_o a_o month_n or_o two_o i_o be_v little_o satisfy_v no_o long_o than_o i_o be_v engage_v in_o such_o work_n as_o read_v hear_v deep_a meditation_n but_o especial_o prayer_n and_o these_o oh_o these_o be_v the_o physician_n that_o i_o look_v upon_o so_o much_o to_o work_v so_o great_a a_o cure_n upon_o my_o soul_n that_o none_o but_o christ_n that_o great_a physician_n can_v do_v and_o true_o the_o best_a of_o the_o physician_n be_v so_o full_a of_o ill_a humour_n themselves_o as_o pride_n self-confidence_n etc._n etc._n that_o without_o the_o physic_n of_o christ_n blood_n to_o purge_v and_o purify_v they_o they_o will_v have_v stink_v in_o the_o nostril_n of_o a_o holy_a and_o pure_a god_n as_o i_o be_o afraid_a they_o often_o do_v min._n now_o you_o have_v give_v in_o a_o account_n about_o sin_n i_o will_v glad_o hear_v what_o account_v you_o can_v give_v about_o the_o way_n of_o holiness_n and_o of_o grace_n and_o how_o you_o begin_v to_o make_v your_o progress_n in_o this_o road_n conu._n i_o must_v be_v but_o very_o brief_a here_o for_o i_o have_v much_o to_o say_v about_o other_o thing_n but_o i_o shall_v as_o the_o lord_n shall_v enable_v i_o satisfy_v you_o in_o this_o as_o i_o tell_v you_o before_o when_o the_o burden_n of_o my_o sin_n first_o come_v upon_o i_o that_o then_o and_o likewise_o in_o the_o six_o year_n of_o my_o conviction_n i_o be_v full_o convince_v of_o the_o necessity_n of_o live_v a_o holy_a life_n and_o of_o the_o beauty_n of_o holiness_n and_o that_o without_o it_o there_o will_v be_v no_o salvation_n for_o without_o holiness_n none_o shall_v see_v the_o lord_n and_o upon_o this_o account_n i_o also_o earnest_o beseech_v the_o lord_n by_o prayer_n and_o hear_v and_o read_v good_a book_n which_o the_o lord_n do_v mighty_o incline_v my_o heart_n to_o do_v and_o so_o every_o day_n i_o do_v more_o and_o more_o desire_n holiness_n and_o do_v earnest_o thirst_v after_o the_o image_n of_o god_n to_o be_v renew_v upon_o my_o heart_n so_o that_o in_o short_a i_o find_v no_o rest_n any_o way_n but_o what_o i_o get_v by_o live_v holy_o and_o abstain_v from_o sin_n and_o as_o my_o weak_a physician_n i_o mean_v my_o prayer_n hear_v read_v meditation_n vow_n resolution_n etc._n etc._n i_o say_v as_o these_o be_v able_a to_o apply_v comfort_n to_o i_o so_o i_o have_v it_o and_o no_o long_o be_v ignorant_a of_o the_o life_n of_o faith_n in_o christ_n and_o true_o they_o prove_v very_o bad_a comforter_n and_o as_o i_o tell_v you_o they_o want_v christ_n blood_n to_o procure_v acceptation_n in_o the_o eye_n of_o a_o pure_a and_o holy_a god_n which_o will_v regard_v they_o with_o favour_n no_o otherwise_o than_o as_o they_o be_v present_v to_o he_o sprinkle_v with_o the_o blood_n of_o his_o son_n min._n methinks_v you_o seem_v to_o speak_v much_o against_o these_o duty_n and_o against_o holiness_n as_o if_o they_o be_v not_o altogether_o necessary_a to_o be_v embrace_v do_v you_o not_o conu._n oh_o no_o god_n forbid_v i_o hope_v i_o shall_v never_o so_o far_o speak_v against_o they_o as_o to_o neglect_v they_o in_o the_o least_o but_o this_o i_o have_v say_v that_o i_o may_v not_o look_v upon_o they_o any_o further_a than_o as_o they_o lead_v i_o to_o christ_n for_o true_o i_o have_v find_v nothing_o in_o the_o world_n so_o much_o hinder_v i_o of_o comfort_n wilful_a sin_n only_o except_v as_o in_o lay_v so_o great_a a_o stress_n upon_o duty_n for_o certain_o have_v i_o lay_v my_o foundation_n sure_a upon_o the_o rock_n of_o christ_n and_o not_o all_o upon_o my_o own_o righteousness_n i_o shall_v never_o have_v be_v so_o much_o shake_v and_o as_o i_o may_v say_v almost_o overturn_v with_o the_o assault_n of_o sin_n and_o satan_n but_o he_o will_v have_v uphold_v i_o with_o his_o everlasting_a arm_n that_o i_o shall_v have_v be_v able_a long_o ago_o to_o have_v triumph_v in_o his_o merit_n over_o all_o the_o assault_n that_o satan_n and_o my_o own_o heart_n make_v against_o i_o min._n how_o long_o do_v you_o live_v upon_o the_o stock_n of_o your_o duty_n before_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o let_v you_o see_v your_o error_n and_o how_o be_v your_o condition_n all_o this_o while_n as_o you_o think_v yourself_o conu._n i_o live_v so_o about_o three_o year_n or_o more_o and_o in_o that_o time_n i_o have_v some_o sad_a declining_n indeed_o every_o day_n almost_o i_o lose_v my_o god_n and_o the_o evidence_n of_o his_o love_n so_o as_o i_o think_v myself_o happy_a long_o than_o when_o i_o can_v perform_v duty_n with_o great_a zeal_n and_o with_o strong_a affection_n and_o then_o oftentimes_o i_o can_v have_v be_v willing_a to_o have_v dye_v as_o i_o think_v my_o heart_n do_v so_o rejoice_v in_o they_o but_o when_o my_o heart_n be_v somewhat_o dead_a and_o flat_a than_o i_o be_v at_o a_o great_a loss_n and_o can_v find_v out_o no_o rest_n for_o the_o sole_a of_o my_o foot_n min._n this_o which_o you_o have_v say_v seem_v to_o i_o to_o be_v a_o little_a strange_a why_o where_o be_v your_o faith_n all_o this_o while_n you_o tell_v i_o before_o that_o you_o dare_v not_o look_v to_o god_n but_o through_o christ_n and_o you_o seem_v then_o as_o you_o go_v along_o to_o make_v christ_n your_o hope_n and_o saviour_n and_o then_o how_o do_v you_o mean_v you_o do_v not_o rest_n in_o he_o conu._n this_o be_v somewhat_o hard_a to_o answer_v but_o i_o hope_v you_o will_v pardon_v my_o weakness_n and_o i_o will_v tell_v you_o as_o plain_a as_o i_o can_v and_o that_o only_o as_o my_o heart_n and_o conscience_n witness_v and_o not_o to_o take_v the_o help_n of_o any_o book_n to_o open_v it_o to_o i_o that_o so_o i_o may_v with_o more_o humble_a confidence_n say_v that_o these_o thing_n i_o have_v se●_n down_o no_o otherwise_o but_o as_o my_o own_o spiri●_n by_o the_o assistance_n of_o god_n spirit_n dictate_v to_o i_o and_o now_o i_o will_v tell_v you_o what_o i_o mean_v by_o what_o i_o have_v say_v i_o hope_v i_o look_v upon_o christ_n to_o be_v a_o complete_a saviour_n in_o every_o respect_n and_o i_o see_v my_o great_a need_n of_o his_o blood_n to_o procure_v my_o pardon_n for_o my_o sin_n and_o i_o know_v that_o it_o be_v only_o from_o his_o grace_n that_o i_o be_v in_o any_o measure_n sanctify_v and_o by_o this_o i_o hope_v i_o lay_v all_o my_o sin_n upon_o he_o and_o dare_v not_o in_o the_o least_o think_v of_o answer_v for_o they_o myself_o before_o god_n and_o seem_v to_o give_v he_o the_o glory_n in_o respect_n to_o any_o work_n of_o holiness_n in_o my_o heart_n and_o so_o i_o do_v high_o prize_v he_o and_o great_o delight_v in_o he_o and_o earnest_o desire_v to_o love_v he_o and_o more_o and_o more_o to_o serve_v he_o and_o so_o i_o act_v faith_n for_o three_o year_n but_o all_o this_o while_n i_o be_v not_o thorough_o convince_v of_o the_o insufficiency_n of_o my_o own_o righteousness_n so_o as_o to_o lay_v that_o at_o christ_n foot_n neither_o can_v i_o suppose_v it_o that_o one_o may_v be_v ●●●●●b●d_v by_o another_o righteousness_n but_o 〈…〉_o that_o because_o i_o be_v not_o altogether_o 〈…〉_o as_o other_o as_o i_o think_v there_o 〈…〉_o ●●ould_v fare_v better_o than_o other_o and_z 〈…〉_o mix_v my_o own_o merit_n with_o christ_n 〈◊〉_d never_o come_v ●o_o far_o out_o of_o myself_o as_o to_o cast_v my_o righteousness_n as_o well_o as_o my_o sin_n at_o his_o sit_fw-mi and_o now_o what_o abundant_a cause_n have_v i_o to_o be_v humble_v and_o to_o lie_v very_o low_a before_o god_n and_o still_o more_o and_o more_o to_o admire_v the_o infinite_a mercy_n and_o patience_n of_o god_n oh_o that_o i_o who_o after_o i_o be_v much_o enlighten_v and_o have_v abundant_o taste_v and_o see_v how_o good_a and_o gracious_a the_o lord_n be_v i_o say_v that_o after_o all_o his_o unspeakable_a mercy_n to_o i_o how_o he_o bring_v i_o out_o of_o my_o egyptian_a bondage_n of_o sin_n and_o loosen_v i_o from_o many_o strong_a hold_v of_o satan_n and_o bring_v i_o so_o near_o to_o his_o father_n bosom_n that_o i_o be_v wont_a to_o be_v many_o time_n almost_o ravish_v with_o the_o fore-thought_n of_o that_o joy_n i_o do_v hope_n for_o in_o heaven_n oh_o that_o after_o he_o have_v pass_v i_o over_o the_o red_a sea_n and_o when_o many_o of_o my_o enemy_n be_v dead_a and_o beat_a back_n and_o that_o after_o he_o have_v try_v i_o a_o little_a in_o the_o wilderness_n of_o this_o world_n than_o he_o will_v have_v bring_v i_o safe_a into_o canaan_n oh_o that_o i_o shall_v be_v so_o disingenuous_a as_o to_o set_v up_o a_o calf_n i_o mean_v my_o own_o righteousness_n
and_o worship_n that_o and_o shall_v do_v what_o i_o do_v more_o to_o advantage_n self_n than_o christ_n oh_o i_o say_v again_o what_o a_o wonder_n it_o be_v that_o ever_o he_o be_v please_v to_o let_v i_o see_v my_o folly_n and_o oh_o if_o he_o shall_v not_o have_v do_v it_o yet_o in_o this_o particular_a how_o inexcusable_a have_v i_o be_v which_o will_v appear_v in_o the_o next_o answer_n min._n now_o let_v i_o know_v when_o and_o in_o what_o manner_n the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o magnify_v his_o grace_n in_o convince_a you_o of_o the_o insufficiency_n of_o your_o own_o righteousness_n and_o of_o the_o rest_n in_o duty_n conu._n i_o will_v likewise_o make_v this_o as_o plain_a to_o you_o as_o the_o lord_n shall_v enable_v i_o so_o that_o i_o may_v not_o be_v find_v guilty_a of_o a_o spiritual_a lie_n and_o to_o the_o best_a of_o my_o remembrance_n about_o four_o month_n after_o my_o powerful_a call_n when_o as_o i_o think_v i_o be_v assure_o in_o a_o most_o happy_a condition_n have_v pass_v through_o abundant_a of_o trial_n and_o temptation_n and_o i_o begin_v to_o find_v they_o somewhat_o to_o flee_v before_o i_o of_o which_o you_o shall_v hear_v anon_o more_o at_o large_a then_o oh_o then_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o put_v into_o my_o hand_n a_o little_a book_n entitle_v the_o christian_n great_a interest_n by_o mr._n guthry_n which_o when_o i_o peruse_v i_o find_v i_o be_v much_o concern_v in_o it_o and_o be_v somewhat_o trouble_v but_o it_o so_o violent_o accuse_v i_o of_o my_o dalilah_n righteousness_n which_o i_o love_v too_o well_o to_o see_v as_o i_o think_v abuse_v with_o a_o small_a sigh_n or_o the_o like_a i_o command_v it_o to_o depart_v and_o not_o to_o dare_v to_o come_v and_o control_n my_o idol_n self_n any_o more_o yet_o it_o make_v my_o way_n so_o plain_a before_o i_o that_o i_o can_v not_o withstand_v it_o a_o little_a while_n after_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o put_v into_o my_o hand_n another_o book_n for_o which_o i_o have_v abundant_a cause_n to_o bless_v god_n which_o be_v the_o sincere_a convert_n and_o read_v the_o latter_a part_n of_o that_o which_o treat_v concern_v carnal_a confidence_n and_o rest_v in_o duty_n all_o which_o do_v very_o much_o concern_v i_o i_o be_v very_o much_o trouble_v and_o begin_v to_o question_v my_o estate_n a_o little_a concern_v duty_n but_o true_o i_o take_v so_o little_a delight_n in_o this_o that_o i_o soon_o lay_v it_o by_o and_o return_v it_o to_o the_o place_n from_o whence_o it_o come_v and_o likewise_o i_o have_v other_o book_n as_o mr._n baxters_n self-denial_n which_o i_o read_v part_n of_o with_o much_o delight_n as_o in_o reference_n in_o deny_v self-pleasure_n and_o sinful_a recreation_n and_o vain_a company_n etc._n etc._n all_o these_o yield_a comfort_n to_o i_o because_o i_o find_v that_o i_o do_v real_o desire_v to_o deny_v myself_o all_o these_o and_o make_v it_o a_o great_a ground_n of_o comfort_n to_o i_o that_o i_o can_v so_o earnest_o desire_v their_o destruction_n but_o when_o i_o come_v to_o the_o denial_n of_o self-righteousness_n this_o be_v a_o hard_a say_n and_o self_n will_v not_o bear_v it_o but_o away_o i_o go_v to_o those_o book_n where_o i_o can_v find_v out_o as_o i_o think_v a_o way_n to_o heaven_n by_o my_o own_o work_n and_o those_o that_o treat_v most_o of_o a_o holy_a life_n be_v the_o most_o please_a to_o i_o but_o when_o i_o read_v concern_v christ_n or_o hear_v he_o teach_v to_o i_o by_o his_o minister_n for_o although_o i_o have_v omit_v how_o my_o heart_n be_v in_o hear_v yet_o i_o will_v desire_v you_o to_o include_v that_o and_o to_o suppose_v that_o my_o heart_n be_v in_o that_o as_o in_o read_v or_o confer_v with_o respect_n to_o the_o subject_n i_o say_v when_o i_o hear_v christ_n teach_v by_o his_o minister_n either_o in_o a_o pulpit_n or_o a_o book_n i_o much_o delight_v in_o that_o i_o hear_v or_o read_v but_o when_o justification_n alone_o by_o faith_n in_o christ_n merit_n and_o live_v by_o faith_n upon_o a_o naked_a christ_n as_o peradventure_o i_o may_v be_v put_v too_o upon_o a_o sick_a bed_n by_o reason_n of_o a_o violent_a disease_n or_o the_o like_a that_o i_o can_v not_o have_v strength_n of_o body_n nor_o composure_n of_o mind_n to_o perform_v duty_n as_o in_o a_o fever_n or_o a_o fit_a of_o the_o stone_n or_o gout_n etc._n etc._n i_o say_v when_o these_o noble_a and_o heavenborn_a mystery_n be_v treat_v on_o i_o be_v much_o to_o seek_v and_o can_v take_v but_o little_a comfort_n from_o they_o and_o so_o i_o go_v on_o from_o duty_n to_o duty_n and_o if_o at_o any_o time_n i_o find_v my_o heart_n dead_a and_o can_v for_o that_o day_n or_o week_n or_o month_n it_o may_v be_v find_v any_o comfort_n from_o they_o than_o i_o live_v in_o hope_n that_o although_o i_o find_v not_o all_o well_o at_o present_a yet_o it_o will_v not_o long_o continue_v so_o with_o i_o and_o so_o in_o some_o time_n i_o recover_v life_n and_o comfort_n again_o i_o say_v i_o continue_v thus_o for_o the_o space_n of_o above_o three_o year_n and_o now_o i_o will_v declare_v one_o thing_n which_o do_v more_o trouble_v i_o than_o ordinary_a and_o that_o be_v in_o august_n last_o 67._o it_o happen_v that_o as_o i_o be_v visit_v a_o patient_a and_o for_o this_o thing_n in_o particular_a i_o have_v cause_n to_o bless_v god_n that_o he_o place_v i_o in_o this_o my_o call_n who_o we_o suppose_v the_o lord_n will_v take_v away_o at_o that_o very_a time_n there_o come_v dr._n b._n to_o perform_v as_o be_v think_v on●_n of_o the_o last_o duty_n he_o have_v to_o do_v 〈◊〉_d and_o among_o his_o discourse_n and_o ad●●●_n 〈◊〉_d bid_v she_o be_v sure_a to_o lay_v all_o her_o sin_n upon_o christ_n which_o i_o like_v very_o well_o but_o withal_o that_o she_o shall_v lay_v all_o her_o own_o righteousness_n at_o his_o foot_n and_o not_o at_o all_o ●o_o trust_v to_o any_o good_a she_o have_v in_o her_o se●f_n but_o whole_o to_o rely_v upon_o the_o merit_n of_o christ_n which_o when_o i_o hear_v my_o heart_n rise_v much_o against_o what_o he_o say_v and_o do_v much_o oppose_v his_o advice_n and_o think_v it_o not_o at_o all_o convenient_a to_o be_v speak_v and_o doubtless_o have_v i_o be_v in_o her_o condition_n i_o mean_v so_o near_a death_n as_o it_o be_v think_v she_o be_v and_o he_o have_v advise_v i_o to_o the_o same_o thing_n and_o have_v clear_v it_o to_o i_o oh_o what_o a_o dreadful_a visitation_n have_v that_o be_v sure_o it_o will_v have_v put_v my_o soul_n into_o such_o a_o dreadful_a agony_n of_o confusion_n if_o not_o despair_v that_o sure_o i_o shall_v have_v dye_v a_o second_o death_n before_o i_o know_v the_o pang_n of_o the_o first_o but_o oh_o i_o say_v again_o who_o can_v hear_v of_o this_o and_o not_o be_v overcome_v with_o soul_n ravish_v admiration_n of_o the_o love_n and_o goodness_n and_o patience_n of_o god_n towards_o such_o a_o wretched_a nothing_o as_o i_o be_v that_o ever_o he_o shall_v so_o long_o forbear_v from_o destroy_v that_o soul_n with_o eternal_a damnation_n that_o will_v not_o with_o the_o cord_n of_o love_n be_v draw_v to_o accept_v of_o so_o clear_a salvation_n but_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v still_o to_o keep_v this_o upon_o my_o heart_n and_o although_o i_o be_v somewhat_o trouble_v but_o as_o before_o again_o i_o go_v to_o my_o old_a physician_n and_o take_v a_o small_a pill_n of_o prayer_n compose_v of_o a_o little_a fear_n and_o humiliation_n but_o no_o soon_o it_o get_v into_o my_o heart_n but_o there_o it_o be_v guilt_n with_o pride_n and_o so_o again_o become_v pleasant_a to_o i_o and_o then_o i_o think_v all_o be_v well_o and_o i_o do_v desire_n earnest_o that_o by_o this_o god_n may_v be_v much_o glorify_v and_o again_o methinks_v i_o find_v my_o heart_n so_o mighty_o incline_v to_o go_v on_o in_o this_o work_n which_o at_o your_o request_n you_o may_v remember_v i_o be_v so_o unwilling_a to_o undertake_v that_o 〈◊〉_d have_v great_a hope_n there_o may_v be_v the_o hand_n of_o god_n in_o it_o and_o that_o it_o be_v he_o that_o put_v it_o into_o your_o heart_n to_o request_v if_o of_o i_o and_o i_o pray_v god_n it_o may_v be_v his_o glory_n alone_o that_o may_v move_v i_o to_o it_o and_o not_o any_o self-pride_n true_o you_o may_v say_v i_o have_v great_a cause_n to_o fear_v and_o not_o to_o trust_v my_o own_o heart_n any_o more_o and_o the_o lord_n preserve_v this_o jealousy_n more_o and_o more_o in_o i_o but_o to_o my_o present_a purpose_n and_o this_o which_o i_o be_o about_o to_o say_v may_v have_v prove_v a_o great_a disadvantage_n to_o i_o
but_o i_o doubt_v not_o but_o the_o hand_n of_o god_n be_v in_o it_o although_o i_o see_v it_o not_o at_o that_o present_a but_o since_o i_o have_v and_o in_o short_a it_o be_v thus_o a_o little_a while_n after_o my_o last_o discourse_n as_o i_o think_v my_o heart_n be_v draw_v after_o the_o vanity_n of_o this_o world_n more_o than_o ordinary_a and_o at_o the_o time_n i_o liken_v the_o estate_n of_o my_o soul_n to_o the_o condition_n of_o a_o fair_a virgin_n that_o have_v many_o suitor_n but_o one_o she_o will_v love_v and_o choose_v above_o the_o rest_n but_o she_o be_v not_o yet_o marry_v they_o all_o make_v out_o for_o her_o love_n which_o be_v no_o small_a trouble_n to_o she_o and_o do_v somewhat_o make_v she_o doubt_v which_o she_o shall_v have_v but_o so_o soon_o as_o she_o be_v marry_v to_o one_o of_o they_o than_o she_o dare_v not_o think_v of_o entertain_v the_o other_o upon_o that_o account_n even_o so_o i_o look_v upon_o my_o poor_a soul_n and_o that_o if_o she_o be_v but_o solemn_o marry_v to_o christ_n i_o mean_v in_o the_o sacrament_n than_o she_o dare_v not_o so_o much_o as_o think_v of_o embrace_v either_o sin_n or_o the_o world_n or_o the_o devil_n but_o still_o righteous_a self_n lie_v all_o this_o while_n secure_a upon_o these_o and_o such_o like_a consideration_n i_o go_v to_o a_o faithful_a divine_a to_o ask_v advice_n of_o he_o concern_v this_o great_a duty_n and_o when_o i_o be_v with_o he_o he_o examine_v i_o why_o and_o how_o i_o come_v to_o embrace_v religion_n and_o when_o i_o have_v give_v he_o the_o head_n only_o of_o the_o first_o account_n concern_v compunction_n he_o ask_v i_o who_o i_o may_v thank_v for_o all_o this_o but_o i_o be_v somewhat_o slow_a of_o answer_n he_o tell_v i_o christ_n and_o he_o alone_o and_o give_v i_o some_o short_a but_o sweet_a advice_n invite_v i_o to_o be_v a_o guest_n at_o his_o master_n table_n which_o be_v the_o intention_n of_o my_o go_n which_o be_v more_o than_o he_o then_o know_v on_o and_o so_o dismiss_v i_o and_z oh_o how_o do_v i_o then_o rejoice_v that_o i_o be_v find_v worthy_a to_o be_v invite_v to_o so_o great_a a_o banquet_n and_o now_o how_o do_v i_o think_v my_o condition_n unquestionable_a and_o nothing_o trouble_v i_o but_o want_v of_o assurance_n to_o persevere_v and_o although_o the_o doctor_n give_v i_o a_o great_a caution_n to_o lay_v all_o upon_o christ_n and_o not_o any_o thing_n upon_o self_n as_o i_o now_o consider_v but_o yet_o my_o eye_n be_v so_o blind_a and_o my_o heart_n so_o deceitful_a that_o i_o soon_o forget_v it_o and_o so_o i_o prepare_v my_o heart_n as_o well_o as_o i_o can_v and_o so_o address_v myself_o to_o the_o lord_n table_n and_o be_v so_o far_o as_o i_o can_v understand_v make_v more_o welcome_a i_o be_o sure_a than_o i_o deserve_v and_o then_o i_o do_v feel_v the_o lord_n with_o his_o cord_n of_o love_n draw_v hard_o at_o my_o poor_a soul_n and_o so_o i_o exercise_v my_o love_n upon_o christ_n and_o so_o far_o as_o i_o know_v enjoy_v sweet_a communion_n with_o he_o but_o this_o last_v no_o long_o than_o my_o heart_n be_v enlarge_v in_o secret_a duty_n but_o when_o they_o depart_v then_o my_o soul_n mourn_v and_o can_v not_o be_v satisfy_v with_o a_o naked_a christ_n while_o my_o enlargement_n return_v again_o to_o i_o and_o by_o this_o i_o perceive_v i_o rest_v in_o duty_n and_o not_o in_o christ_n and_o now_o once_o more_o as_o short_a as_o i_o can_v and_o then_o i_o will_v conclude_v with_o this_o but_o i_o can_v be_v so_o short_a but_o i_o must_v a_o little_a stand_n and_o admire_v at_o the_o unspeakable_a long-suffering_a patience_n of_o god_n and_o oh_o that_o you_o will_v help_v i_o in_o this_o matter_n for_o i_o profess_v i_o be_o much_o ashamed_a and_o desire_v to_o be_v more_o of_o my_o own_o heart_n that_o it_o shall_v be_v barren_a of_o praise_n to_o that_o god_n that_o have_v do_v sure_a as_o much_o or_o more_o for_o my_o poor_a soul_n as_o to_o any_o since_o the_o creation_n of_o the_o world_n oh_o 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offer_v praise_n to_o god_n for_o this_o oh_o i_o wish_v that_o i_o can_v but_o true_o i_o can_v as_o i_o will_v oh_o i_o can_v and_o i_o humble_o desire_v to_o acknowledge_v the_o barrenness_n of_o my_o heart_n in_o this_o and_o be_o silent_a and_o now_o pray_v lend_v i_o your_o patience_n but_o a_o very_a little_a and_o i_o fear_v your_o heart_n will_v be_v straighten_v with_o praise_n to_o god_n as_o well_o as_o i_o for_o now_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o incline_v my_o heart_n to_o read_v part_n of_o two_o book_n one_o of_o the_o two_o be_v that_o which_o i_o above_o two_o year_n before_o reject_v i_o will_v name_v they_o viz._n the_o sincere_a convert_n and_o sound_a believer_n both_o by_o one_o author_n t._n s._n and_o when_o i_o be_v reading_n concern_v the_o soul_n rest_v in_o duty_n and_o how_o hard_o a_o thing_n it_o be_v to_o forsake_v all_o its_o own_o good_a and_o whole_o to_o throw_v itself_o upon_o a_o naked_a christ_n and_o then_o concern_v the_o nature_n of_o true_a humiliation_n i_o be_v much_o trouble_v and_o my_o thought_n be_v much_o perplex_v in_o so_o much_o that_o i_o think_v to_o open_v my_o case_n to_o some_o divine_a but_o to_o this_o trouble_n another_o be_v add_v which_o be_v that_o at_o that_o time_n the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o let_v i_o see_v my_o own_o nakedness_n so_o much_o and_o that_o which_o i_o take_v to_o be_v a_o cover_n to_o it_o make_v it_o seem_v to_o be_v much_o more_o naked_a than_o i_o can_v have_v imagine_v it_o to_o be_v that_o then_o i_o think_v the_o more_o i_o pray_v the_o more_o i_o sin_v and_o the_o more_o i_o confess_v and_o repent_v and_o bewail_v my_o own_o wretched_a heart_n especial_o in_o the_o time_n of_o duty_n the_o more_o i_o have_v cause_n to_o do_v so_o still_o and_o now_o i_o look_v upon_o myself_o in_o a_o most_o sad_a and_o destitute_a condition_n for_o how_o can_v i_o choose_v when_o i_o see_v my_o own_o goodness_n depart_v from_o i_o which_o i_o idolise_v as_o the_o rock_n of_o my_o salvation_n and_o when_o i_o see_v such_o a_o numberless_a number_n of_o sin_n come_v afresh_o into_o my_o mind_n especial_o in_o the_o time_n of_o duty_n that_o it_o seem_v to_o i_o as_o if_o the_o devil_n have_v conjure_v up_o all_o those_o sin_n that_o i_o think_v be_v long_o before_o slay_v and_o he_o himself_o have_v be_v their_o captain_n and_o have_v unaware_o assault_v i_o and_o have_v take_v my_o duty_n which_o i_o make_v then_o the_o captain_n of_o my_o salvation_n prisoner_n and_o i_o alone_o leave_v to_o encounter_v with_o they_o without_o the_o least_o weapon_n to_o defend_v my_o poor_a soul_n and_o oh_o have_v these_o and_o the_o pang_n of_o death_n meet_v together_o oh_o what_o horror_n and_o amazement_n will_v there_o have_v be_v but_o bless_v be_v god_n it_o be_v before_o now_o to_o say_v how_o long_o i_o be_v in_o this_o case_n i_o can_v well_o tell_v but_o i_o see_v my_o idol_n god_n so_o accuse_v and_o condemn_v and_o my_o hatred_n to_o he_o be_v so_o great_a that_o i_o hope_v i_o do_v desire_v never_o to_o cease_v my_o earnest_a prayer_n to_o the_o true_a god_n that_o he_o will_v 01_o have_v this_o usurper_n execute_v and_o likewise_o i_o do_v as_o i_o be_v able_a earnest_o beg_v of_o the_o lord_n that_o he_o will_v give_v i_o strength_n to_o resist_v he_o so_o that_o he_o may_v never_o sit_v upon_o his_o throne_n more_o and_o then_o i_o do_v see_v through_o admire_a grace_n the_o want_n of_o christ_n more_o than_o ever_o not_o only_o to_o cover_v