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A57009 The works of F. Rabelais, M.D., or, The lives, heroic deeds and sayings of Gargantua and Pantagruel with a large account of the life and works of the author, particularly an explanation of the most difficult passages in them never before publish'd in any language / done out of French by Sir Tho. Urchard, Kt., and others. Rabelais, François, ca. 1490-1553?; Urquhart, Thomas, Sir, 1611-1660. 1694 (1694) Wing R104; ESTC R29255 455,145 1,095

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Soul of the Universe which according to the Opinion of the Academicks vivifyeth all manner of things In Confirmation whereof that you may the better believe it to be so represent unto your self without any prejudicacy of Spirit in a clear and serene Fancy the Idea and Form of some other World than this take if you please and lay hold on the thirtieth of those which the Philosopher Methrodorus did enumerate wherein it is to be supposed there is no Debtor or Creditor that is to say a World without Debts There amongst the Planets will be no regular Course all will be in Disorder Iupiter reckoning himself to be nothing indebted unto Saturn will go near to detrude him out of his Sphere and with the Homerick Chain will be like to hang up the Intelligences Gods Heavens Demons Heroes Devils Earth and Sea together with the other Elements Saturn no doubt combining with Mars will reduce that so disturbed World into a Chaos of Confusion Mercury then would be no more subjected to the other Planets he would scorn to be any longer their Camillus as he was of old termed in the Hetrurian Tongue for it is to be imagined that he is no way a Debtor to them Venus will be no more Venerable because she shall have lent nothing The Moon will remain bloody and obscure For to what end should the Sun impart unto her any of his Light He owed her nothing Nor yet will the Sun shine upon the Earth nor the Stars send down any good Influence because the Terrestrial Globe hath desisted from sending up their wonted Nourishment by Vapours and Exhalations wherewith Heraclitus said the Stoicks proved Cicero maintained they were cherished and alimented There would likeways be in such a World no manner of Symbolization Alteration nor Transmutation amongst the Elements for the one will not esteem it self obliged to the other as having borrowed nothing at all from it Earth then will not become Water Water will not be changed into Air of Air will be made no Fire and Fire will afford no Heat unto the Earth the Earth will produce nothing but Monsters Titans Giants no Rain will descend upon it nor Light shine thereon no Wind will blow there nor will there be in it any Summer or Harvest Lu●●fer will break loose and issuing forth of the depth of Hell accompanied with his Furies Fiends and Horned Devils will go about to unnestle and drive out of Heaven all the Gods as well of the greater as of the lesser Nations Such a World without lending will be no better than a Dog-kennel a place of Contention and Wrangling more unruly and irregular than that of the Rector of Paris a Devil of an Hurly-burly and more disordered Confusion than that of the Plagues of Douay Men will not then salute one another it will be but lost labour to expect Aid or Succour from any or to cry Fire Water Murther for none will put to their helping Hand Why He lent no Money there is nothing due to him No body is concerned in his Burning in his Shipwrack in his Ruine or in his Death and that because he hitherto had lent nothing and would never thereafter have lent any thing In short Faith Hope and Charity would be quite banish'd from such a World for Men are born to relieve and assist one another and in their stead should succeed and be introduced Defiance Disdain and Rancour with the most execrable Troop of all Evils all Imprecations and all Miseries Whereupon you will think and that not amiss that Pandora had there spilt her unlucky Bottle Men unto Men will be Wolves Hobthrushers and Goblins as were Lycaon Bellorophon Nebuchodonosor Plunderers High-way Robbers Cut-throats Rapperees Murtherers Payloners Assassinators lewd wicked malevolent pernicious Haters set against every body like to Ismael Metabus or Timon the Athenian who for that cause was named Misanthropos in such sort that it would prove much more easie in Nature to have Fish entertained in the Air and Bullocks fed in the bottom of the Ocean than to support or tolerate a rascally Rabble of People that will not Lend These Fellows I vow do I hate with a perfect Hatred and if conform to the pattern of this grievous peevish and perverse World which lendeth nothing you figure and liken the little World which is Man you will find in him a terrible justling Coyle and Clutter The Head will not lend the sight of his Eyes to guide the Feet and Hands the Legs will refuse to bear up the Body the Hands will leave off working any more for the rest of the Members the Heart will be weary of its continual Motion for the beating of the Pulse and will no longer lend his Assistance the Lungs will withdraw the use of their Bellows the Liver will desist from convoying any more Blood through the Veins for the good of the whole the Bladder will not be indebted to the Kidneys so that the Urine thereby will be totally stopped The Brains in the interim considering this unnatural course will fall into a raving Dotage and with-hold all feeling from the Sinews and Motion from the Muscles Briefly in such a World without Order and Array owing nothing lending nothing and borrowing nothing you would see a more dangerous Conspiration than that which Esope exposed in his Apologue Such a World will perish undoubtedly and not only perish but perish very quickly Were it Asculapius himself his Body would immediately rot and the chafing Soul full of Indignation take its Flight to all the Devils of Hell after my Money CHAP. IV. Panurge continueth his Discourse in the praise of Borrowers and Lenders ON the contrary be pleased to represent unto your Fancy another World wherein every one lendeth and every one oweth all are Debtors and all Creditors O how great will that Harmony be which shall thereby result from the regular Motions of the Heavens Methinks I hear it every whit as well as ever Plato did What Sympathy will there be amongst the Elements O how delectable then unto Nature will be our own Works and Productions Whilst Ceres appeareth loaden with Corn Bacchus with Wines Flora with Flowers Pomona with Fruits and Iuno fair in a clear Air wholsom and pleasant I lose my self in this high Contemplation Then will among the Race of Mankind Peace Love Benevolence Fidelity Tranquility Rest Banquets Feastings Joy Gladness Gold Silver single Money Chains Rings with other Ware and Chaffer of that nature be found to trot from hand to hand no Suits at Law no Wars no Strife Debate nor wrangling none will be there an Usurer none will be there a Pinch-penny a Scrape-good Wretch or churlish hard-hearted Refuser Good God! Will not this be the Golden Age in the Reign of Saturn The true Idea of the Olympick Regions wherein all Vertues cease Charity alone ruleth governeth domineereth and triumpheth All will be fair and goodly People there all just and vertuous O happy World O People of that
World most happy Yea thrice and four times blessed is that People I think in very deed that I am amongst them and swear to you by my good Forsooth that if this glorious aforesaid World had a Pope abounding with Cardinals that so he might have the Association of a Sacred Colledge in the space of very few years you should be sure to see the Sancts much thicker in the Roll more numerous wonder-working and mirifick more Services more Vows more Staves and Wax-Candles than are all those in the Nine Bishopricks of Britany St. Yves only excepted Consider Sir I pray you how the noble Patelin having a mind to Deity and extol even to the Third Heavens the Father of William Iosseaume said no more but this And he did lend his Goods to those who were desirous of them O the fine Saying Now let our Microcosm be fancied conform to this Model in all its Members lending borrowing and owing that is to say according to its own Nature For Nature hath not to any other end created Man but to owe borrow and lend no greater is the Harmony amongst the Heavenly Spheres than that which shall be found in its well-ordered Policy The Intention of the Founder of this Microcosm is to have a Soul therein to be entertained which is lodged there as a Guest with its Host it may live there for a while Life consisteth in Blood Blood is the Seat of the Soul therefore the chiefest Work of the Microcosm is to be making Blood continually At this Forge are exercised all the Members of the Body none is exempted from Labour each operates apart and doth its proper Office And such is their Hierarchy that perpetually the one borrows from the other the one lends the other and the one is the others Debtor The stuff and matter convenient which Nature giveth to be turned into Blood is Bread and Wine All kind of nourishing Victuals is understood to be comprehended in these two and from hence in the Gothish Tongue is called Companage To find out this Meat and Drink to prepare and boil it the Hands are put to Work the Feet do walk and bear up the whole Bulk of the Corporal Mass the Eyes guide and conduct all the Appetite in the Orifice of the Stomach by means of little sowrish black Humour called Melancholy which is transmitted thereto from the Milt giveth warning to shut in the Food The Tongue doth make the first Essay and tastes it the Teeth do chaw it and the Stomach doth receive digest and chylifie it the Mesaraick Veins suck out of it what is good and fit leaving behind the Excrements which are through special Conduits for that purpose voided by an expulsive Faculty thereafter it is carried to the Liver where it being changed again it by the vertue of that new Transmutation becomes Blood What Joy conjecture you will then be found amongst those Officers when they see this Rivolet of Gold which is their sole Restorative No greater is the Joy of Alchimists when after long Travel Toil and Expence they see in their Furnaces the Transmutation Then is it that every Member doth prepare it self and strive a-new to purifie and to refine this Treasure The Kidneys through the emulgent Veins draw that Aquosity from thence which you call Urine and there send it away through the Ureters to be slipt downwards where in a lower Recepticle and proper for it to wit the Bladder it is kept and stayeth there until an opportunity to void it out in his due time The Spleen draweth from the Blood its Terrestrial part viz. The Grounds Lees or thick Substance setled in the bottom thereof which you term Melancholy The Bottle of the Gall substracts from thence all the superfluous Choler whence it is brought to another Shop or Work-house to be yet better purified and fined that is the Heart which by its agitation of Diastolick and Systolick Motions so neatly subtilizeth and inflames it that in the right side Ventricle it is brought to perfection and through the Veins is sent to all the Members each parcel of the Body draws it then unto its self and after its own fashion is cherished and alimented by it Feet Hands Thighs Arms Eyes Ears Back Breast yea all and then it is that who before were Lenders now become Debtors The Heart doth in its left side Ventricle so thinnifie the Blood that it thereby obtains the Name of Spiritual which being sent through the Arteries to all the Members of the Body serveth to warm and winnow the other Blood which runneth through the Veins The Lights never cease with its Lappets and Bellows to cool and refresh it in acknowledgment of which good the Heart through the Arterial Vein imparts unto it the choicest of its Blood At last it is made so fine and subtle within the Rete Mirabilis that thereafter those Animal Spirits are framed and composed of it by means whereof the Imagination Discourse Judgment Resolution Deliberation Ratrocination and Memory have their Rise Actings and Operations Cops body I sink I drown I perish I wander astray and quite fly out of my self when I enter into the Consideration of the profound Abyss of this World thus lending thus owing Believe me it is a Divine thing to lend to owe an Heroick Vertue Yet is not this all this little World thus lending owing and borrowing is so good and charitable that no sooner is the above-specified Alimentation finished but that it forthwith projecteth and hath already forecast how it shall lend to those who are not as yet born and by that Loan endeavour what it may to eternize it self and multiply in Images like the Pattern that is Children To this end every Member hath of the choicest and most precious of its Nourishment pare and cut off a Portion then instantly dispatcheth it downwards to that place where Nature hath prepared for it very fit Vessels and Receptacles through which descending to the Genitories by long Ambages Circuits and Flexuosities it receiveth a competent Form and Rooms apt enough both in the Man and Woman for the future Conservation and perpetuating of Humane kind All this is done by Loans and Debts of the one unto the other and hence have we this word the Debt of Marriage Nature doth reckon Pain to the Refuser with a most grievous Vexation to his Members and an outragious Fury amidst his Senses But on the other part to the Lender a set Reward accompanied with Pleasure Joy Solace Mirth and merry Glee CHAP. V. How Pantagruel altogether abhorreth the Debtors and Borrowers I Understand you very well quoth Pantagruel and take you to be very good at Topicks and throughly affectioned to your own Cause But preach it up and patrocinate it prattle on it and defend it as much as you will even from hence to the next Whitsuntide if you please so to do yet in the end will you be astonished to find how you shall have gained no ground at all upon
so many years still hitting the Nail on the Head never missing the Mark and always judging aright by the meer throwing of the Dice and the Chance thereof is that which most astonisheth and amazeth me To answer quoth Epistemon categorically to that which you wonder at I must ingeniously confess and avow that I cannot yet conjecturally to guess at the reason of it I would refer the Cause of that marvelously long continued happy Success in the Judiciary Results of his Definitive Sentences to the favourable Aspect of the Heavens and Benignity of the Intelligences who out of their love to Goodness after having contemplated the pure Simplicity and sincere Unfeignedness of Judge Bridlegoose in the acknowledgment of his Inabilities did regulate that for him by Chance which by the profoundest Act of his maturest Deliberation he was not able to reach unto That likeways which possibly made him to diffide in his own Skill and Capacity notwithstanding his being an expert and understanding Lawyer for any thing that I know to the contrary was the Knowledge and Experience which he had of the Antenomies Contrarieties Antilogies Contradictions Traversings and Thwartings of Laws Customs Edicts Statutes Orders and Ordinances in which dangerous Opposition Equity and Justice being structured and founded on either of the opposite Terms and a Gap being thereby opened for the ushering in of Injustice and Iniquity through the various Interpretations of Self ended Lawyers being assuredly perswaded that the Infernal Calumniator who frequently transformeth himself into the likeness of a Messenger or Angel of Light maketh use of these cross Glosses and Expositions in the Mouths and Pens of his Ministers and Servants the perverse Advocates bribing Judges Law-monging Attorneys prevaricating Counsellors and other such like Law-wrestling Members of a Court of Justice to turn by those means Black to White Green to Grey and what is Streight to a Crooked ply for the more expedient doing whereof these Diabolical Ministers make both the Pleading Parties believe that their Cause is just and righteous for it is well known that there is no Cause how bad soever which doth not find an Advocate to patrocinate and defend it else would there be no Process in the World no Suits at Law nor Pleadings at the Bar. He did in these Extremities as I conceive most humbly recommend the Direction of his Judicial Proceedings to the upright Judge of Judges God Almighty did submit himself to the Conduct and Guideship of the blessed Spirit in the Hazard and Perplexity of the Definitive Sentence and by this Aleatory Lot did as it were implore and explore the Divine Decree of his Good Will and Pleasure in stead of that which we call the Final Iudgment of a Court. To this effect to the better attaining to his purpose which was to judge righteously he did in my Opinion throw and turn the Dice to the end that by the Providence aforesaid the best Chance might fall to him whose Action was uprightest and backed with greatest Reason in doing whereof he did not stray from the Sence of Talmudists who say that there is so little harm in that manner of searching the Truth that in the Anxiety and Perplexedness of Humane Wits God oftentimes manifesteth the Secret Pleasure of his Divine Will Furthermore I will neither think nor say nor can I believe that the unstreightness is so irregular or the Corruption so evident of those of the Parliament of Mirlingois in Mirlingues before whom Bridlegoose was Arraigned for Prevarication that they will maintain it to be a worse Practice to have the Decision of a Suit at Law referred to the Chance and Hazard of a Throw of the Dice hab nab or luck as it will than to have it remitted to and past by the Determination of those whose Hands are full of Blood and Hearts of wry Affections Besides that their principal Direction in all Law-matters comes to their Hands from one Tribonian a wicked miscreant barbarous faithless and perfidious Knave so pernicious injust avaricious and perverse in his ways that it was his ordinary custom to sell Laws Edicts Declarations Constitutions and Ordinances as at an Outroop or Putsale to him who offered most for them Thus did he shape Measures for the Pleaders and cut their Morsels to them by and out of these little Parcels Fragments Bits Scantlings and Shreds of the Law now in use altogether concealing suppressing disannulling and abolishing the remainder which did make for the total Law fearing that if the whole Law were made manifest and laid open to the knowledge of such as are interessed in it and the Learned Books of the Ancient Doctors of the Law upon the Exposition of the Twelve Tables and Praetorian Edicts his villanous Pranks Naughtiness and vile Impiety should come to the publick notice of the World Therefore were it better in my Conceit that is to say less inconvenient that Parties at Variance in any Juridicial Case should in the dark march upon Caltropes then to submit the Determination of what is their Right to such unhallowed Sentences and horrible Decrees As Cato in his time wished and advised that every Judiciary Court should be paved with Caltropes CHAP. XLV How Panurge taketh Advice of Triboulet ON the sixth Day thereafter Pantagruel was returned home at the very same hour that Triboulet was by Water come from Blois Panurge at his Arrival gave him a Hogs Bladder puffed up with Wind and resounding because of the hard Pease that were within it Moreover he did present him with a guilt Wooden Sword a hollow Budget made of a Tortoise shell an Osier Watled Wicker-Bottle full of Briton Wine and Five and Twenty Apples of the Orchard of Blanduc● If he be such a Fool quoth Carpalin as to be won with Apples there is no more Wit in his Pate than in the Head of an ordinary Cabbage Triboulet girded the Sword and Scrip to his●side took the Bladder in his Hand ate some few of the Apples and drunk up all the Wine Panurge very wistly and heedfully looking upon him said I never yet saw a Fool and I have seen ten thousand Franks worth of that kind of Cattle who did not love to drink heartily and by good long Draughts When Triboulet had done with his Drinking Panurge laid out before him and exposed the Sum of the business wherein he was to require his Advice in eloquent and choicely-sorted Terms adorned with Flourishes of Rhetorick But before he had altogether done Triboulet with his Fist gave him a bouncing Whirret between the Shoulders rendred back into his Hand again the empty Bottle filipped and flirted him on the Nose with the Hogs Bladder and lastly for a final resolution shaking and wagging his Head strongly and disorderly he answered nothing else but this By God God mad Fool beware the Monk Buzansay Hornepipe These Words thus finished he slipped himself out of the Company went aside and ratling the Bladder took a huge Delight in the Melody of the rickling crackling