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A20078 The ravens almanacke foretelling of a [brace] plague, famine, and ciuill warre, that shall happen this present yeare 1609, not only within this kingdome of Great Britaine, but also in France, Germany, Spaine, and other parts of Christendome : with certaine remedies, rules, and receipts, how to preuent or at least to abate the edge of these vniuersall calamities. Dekker, Thomas, ca. 1572-1632. 1609 (1609) STC 6519.2; ESTC S327 44,288 66

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rather you are the Golden number to 1609. Yet giue me leaue to tell you that this yeare will bring many miseries vppon your heads yet shall it happen well inough to many of your fraternitie because euen when those stormes are vppon comming which by all Astrogicall predictions must happen you will be sure and so wise as to hide your heads and not put them out a dores Beware of combinations conspiracies and copartnerships knit amongst your selues for th● surprising of Plutus the God of ●iches for let the league be neuer so strongly tyed yet it is thought that at the least foure times in the yeare ●ome of you will breake To bring which stratagem the better to passe I mean that of vndermining breaking in vpon you blowing you vp I finde that not onely Co●rtiers but ●lso Captaines and your best men of warre will neuer giue ouer till they be grea● in your bookes and when you haue put most trust into them then will they get the gates of the Cittie yssue brauely forth to saue themselues leauing you to the me●cy of your cruell e●en i●e Serieants and Creditors Thus haue I drawne a paire of Indentures quadrupartite betwe●ne you my worthiest and most openhanded Patron● sealing you vp all foure together in the bondes of my l●ue I bestowe vppon you this first chicken of mine hatched out of my Astronomicall braine-pan and because euery Almanacke makes as it were a Stage-play of the yeare deuiding it into fourepartes or rather plaies the executioner with it by cutting it into quarters To each one of you doe I therefore send a quarter climbe vp then and behold what nest my Rauen hath builded this yeare 1609. But carrie the mindes and manhood of true Patrons neither suffer any critickes to plucke off her feathers nor offer you vnto her that indignity your selues And thus because much fowle weather is toward if any Calender tell no lyes and that I am loath to haue you stand in a storme I bid you farewell dated the 1. Ides of the first month of this first great Platonicall and terrible yeare 1609. ● Deckers THE Rauens Almanacke The Dominion of the Moone in Mans bodie Aries The head and face Gemini Armes shoulde● Leo Heart backet Libra Reines lynes Sagitari the Thighes Aquarius●egges ●egges Taurus Neck● throate Cancer Brest stomacke Lunges Virgo●uts ●uts belley Scorpio secrets bladler Caprico nus the knees pisces The Feete AT the beginning of euery Almanacke it is the fashion to haue the bo●i● of a man drawne as you see and not onely ●aited but bitten and shot at by wilde beasts and m●nsters And this fellow they that lye all the yeare long that is to say those that deale with Kalenders cal the Man of the Moone or the Moones man or the man to whom the Moone is mistris But how rediculous a shape do they bestowe vppon the silly wretch hee standes as if he had bene some notorious malefa●or and being stript stark naked to goe to execution do not those Roundels hang about him sh●w like so many pardons tyed to the parts of his body with Labels or rather does he not looke when he lyes along like a thee●e begd for an Anatomie in Surgeons Hall so many Barbers figured in those beastes slashing and slycing and quartering cutting him vp truely he does But why in the name of the moon the rest of the Planets doe both our Neotericall and the more antique Astronomers publish euerie yeare in print that euerie mans body dwells thus at 12. Signes Is man such an asse that he cannot finde his own selfe without the helpe of so many signes or were there none but tradesmen in the world when Almanacks were first inuented for all men know that Noblemen Gentlemen and those of the best and formost ranckes in any common-wealth vse to dwell at no signe at all much labour therefore me thinks might be saued by the Printers euerie yeare and much cost by the Stationers if they would crosse this poore creature out of their bookes For what Cuckold vnlesse his hornes hang too much in the light of his wit● will not sweare that Aries which signifies a Ram doth gouerne the head Is he not thereuppon in mockerie or rather to put him in minde of the points of the Rauens Almanack cald a Ram-headed Cuckold And what Butchers wife nay almost what Butchers Dog or what gamster that loues the Beare-garden but knowes that Taurus the Bul dominieres ouer the necke yea and sometimes breakes the neck of the strongest Mastiffe that sets vpon him Will not the least Fishmongers boy assure you either in lent or in the open times that Cancer the Crab is very good meat for the brest Stomacke and ribs else wherefore should our Letchers buy them vp so fast And I pray ask any Wench if she once ariue at thirtéene if Virgo the Uirgin beare not a greate stroke ouer the bowels and the belly As for the secret members it may well be said that Scorpio the Scorpion has to doe with them because many times in the yere they are bitten as it were with the stings of Scorpions for their euill dooing And wisely did the Moone appoint in the lowerhouse of heauen that Capricornus the Goat should gouerne the knées of Gemini● for the Goate being of all Beasts most letcherous it is a morrall that those men who run after nothing but wenches must by course of nature be broght on their knees Now that Gemini the Twins haue a hand ouer the armes shoul●ers either of man or woman euerie woman that hath had two children at a b●rth or euerie countri● Nurse that hath giuen sucke to a couple at one time will I am sure testifie Then doth Leo the Lyon rule the heart ●nd backe the meaning of which is to make men ashamde of cowardice whose hearts are no bigger then chickens hearts But what Gr●cer Silkeman Apothecarie or any other that handles the Scales of Citie Iustice but can sweare and all the world knowes they neuer sweare but truly that Libra the Ballance holds the measure of the Reynes and Loyns for if those members haue not their full weight all the bodie paies for it As for the Thinges ouer which Sagitarius the Archer carries sway any Fletcher in Grub-streete or any that euer shot in a Long-bows either at Buts or at Prickes will if the case were to be decided stand to the proofe thereof The Legs are next and that those are gouernd by Aquarius the Waterman any Sculler whose legs get his liuing by a Stretcher will not deny it We are now as lowe as the feete whose steps are guided by Pisces the two Fishes any man that walkes into Fish-streete for a fish dinner knowes the morrall of that And thus haue I showne vnto you the right natures and meaning of these Celestiall gouernors according to that true and new doctrine of the Science Astroiogicall whose misteries haue bene for the good