kind of mercy to put men to death quickely This Martyrdome of mortification God doth highly prize without that other which is by effusion of blood this must goe before that and that without this is of no worth nor deserues the name of Martyrdome at all Whose Martyrdome shall I dare to compare with the various hideous and tedious sufferings of holy Iob The best is this contention for immortalitie will not onely be mortall but soone at an end The Martyrs of both sorts so I tearme them because they dye in and for thee shall haue fulnesse of felicity to satiate their largest desires for they both shall haue both ioy without measure and life without end they shall both enioy abundance of pleasures at thy right hand for euermore The summe of all is I must drench and drowne my sinnes and the corrupt affections of my wicked heart in the sea of sorrowfull repentance and then my soule will nimbly and swiftly swim to the land of promise and hauen of happinesse They that will offer this sacrifice their hearts must fall from the high mountaine of pride downe into the lowest valley of humiliation and they must bee bruised with the fall pained with the bruise I will present an humble bruised and sorrowfull heart vnto thee Thou O Lord art nigh to them that are of a contrite spirit who speake to thee in bitternesse their soule who crye like the Draggon and Ostriche for griefe of their sinnes committed They who cry De profundis out of the deepe are not in the deepe their very crye reares and raises them vp Thine eare is within mans heart thou perceiuest the hearts first relenting before it come to the tongues relating I did purpose and say within my selfe I will confesse my sinne and thou tookest notice thereof and forgauest the iniquity of my sinne Thus saith the High and lofty One that inhabiteth eternity whose Name is holy 〈◊〉 dwell in the High and holy place with whom with him that is of a contrite and humble spirit to what end to reuiue the spirit of the humble and to reuiue the heart of the contrite ones Thou wilt not despise nay thou wilt highly prize graciously receiue 〈◊〉 and comfort thou wilt giue them beauty for ashes the oyle of ioy for mourning the garment of gladnesse for the spirit of heauinesse As a bone in the arme or legge once broken and being well set againe growes stronger then if it had neuer beene broken so our hearts being well and soundly healed by true repentance of the sores and bruises of sinne become more firme and stable then euer they were before Thus my foule fall becomes foelix culpa I am after a sort happy in my vnhappinesse for out of my great misery through thy greatest mercy a greater happinesse doth arise then euer I felt before 18 O be fauourable to Sion for thy good pleasure HEE that prayes to thee must not pray for himselfe alone Howsoeuer hee beginne with prayer for himselfe when he hath gained some interest in thee for himselfe hee may the sooner preuaile for others hee must end with prayer for thy Church hee must not end till hee haue recommended the whole Church in his prayers vnto thee He that is a liuely and feeling member of that mysticall body whereof thy Christ is the head must pray for the whole body As in the naturall body the heart feeles the akeing of the head and the head the oppression of the heart the heart and head both doe resent a fellon in one of the fingers and the gowt in one of the toes the stomacke simpathizeth with the braine and the braine with the stomacke so and much more is it in the mysticall body True Christians are like those Twynnes who are reported to haue wept and laughed slept and waked liued and dyed together They must weepe with them that weepe mourne with those that lament suffer hunger thirst nakednesse and imprisonment with others their brethren afflicted with such crosses participate with them in all their miseries and aduersities what soeuer Captaine Vriah mine honest seruant could say The Arke and Israel and Iudah abide in Tents and my Lord Ioab and the seruants of my Lord are incamped in the open field and shall I then goe into my house to eate and drinke and lye with my Wife While they are in ieopardy I cannot be in iollity while they liue in feare I cannot enioy security Wherefore be fauourable to Sion to thy Church and chosen I being one of them must abide one and the same fortune and condition with them This is that vnion of the Saints in thy Christ that communion of them among themselues which cannot easily bee comprehended much lesse fully expressed and yet must it bee constantly belieued and will be in some measure continually resented The Church is represented by the name of Sion Sion the holy Mountaine in Hierusalem which thou louest from whence thy lawe should come and where thou wilt dwell for euer Iehouah hath chosen Sion and desired it for his seate and said This is my rest here will I sit euen to perpetuity But besides this generall I acknowledge my selfe tyed by a speciall obligation to pray for Sion for there was no let on my part but that the whole kingdome of thy Christ might haue fallen to the ground for I being raised from the dunghill to the Diadem from the Parke to the Pallace from following the Ewes great with young to feede thy people and anoynted King to the end I should gather thy Church together by my Apostasie haue scattered and wasted it so farre forth as there is great cause to feare the vtter ruine and desolation thereof Wherefore by force and in remorse of conscience I beg for the sustentation and preseruation of thy Church through thy free and vndeserued mercy Thou O Lord art the onely founder of this choise Company and corporation As out of thy loue onely thou didst single and select them from other refuse people before the foundation of the world as by the same loue thou hast supported and preserued them amids all dangers and disasters euer sithence so I beseech thee still to continue thine ancient accustomed and affectionate fauour to them Let not my vnhappinesse impeach their happinesse let not the darke and foggy mists of my wickednes ecclipse the light and luster of thy countenance towards them let them be still as deare vnto thee as the apple of thine owne eye doe not spill them for my faults but spare mee and them for thine owne sake Thou doest often and mayest alwaies punish the people for the sins of their Princes Wherefore I beseech thee not onely to pardon my sins to my selfe but to be fauourable to my people also and not to suffer them to smart and suffer for my offences It is I that haue sinned and done euill indeed but as for these sheepe what haue they done let
a greater cannot be bestowed vpon the soule of man whiles it is confined within this valley of teares inclosed within this bodie of death And because through the frailty of my flesh and the fraud of Satan I am so prone to recidiuation and backe shding so ready to fall away from thee euen 〈◊〉 many Apostasies pardoned vnlesse I be still vpheld and supported giue me thy free spirit that 〈◊〉 may cheerefully thy firme spirit that I may constantly accomplish thy blessed will and 〈◊〉 in 〈◊〉 good duties that 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 vnto me And for that thankefulnesse is the best returne for benefits receiued and the strongest meanes to purchase new fauours giue mee grace as to promise so to performe gratitude euery way and euermore highly to esteeme and zealously to affect the reducing reclaiming and conuerting of sinners and impious persons those that erre in their religion or conuersation or both as the most acceptable seruice that can be done vnto thee vpon earth Teach me to vse all earnest compellation and powerfull insinuation to winne thy fauour againe when I haue forfeited it by committing some grieuous sin especially quicken mee by faith to make a particular application and appropriation as it were of thy saluation to mine owne soule which pious presumption and holy ambition thou art well pleased withall Giue me grace with the deepest straine of my hart and the loudest tone and tune of my voyce to magnifie thy marueilous goodnesse Though I be lesse then the least of thy mercies yet teach me in duty and discretion for more bountifull fauours to returne more plentifull praises If I be deliuered from a crying sinne I ought of congruence to sing aloud of thy iustice which giuing assurance of thy mercy by performance of thy couenant of grace cannot but produce an exultation of the heart and an exaltation of the voyce and tongue in the celebration of thy iust praises But alas how can I make that poore returne for thy rich mercies which mee thinkes I ought to vowe and promise When all is done I must therein also craue thy blessed assistance that thou wilt be pleased to open my lips and to vntie my tongue strings I must owe thee for that grace also and goe on thy score euen for those praises which onely by Eccho I resound vnto 〈◊〉 Blessed be thy name O Lord who in my deepest distresse and heauiest condition for my sinnes when I seeke for ease and reliefe tellest mee the meanes whereby thine anger may be appeased and thy fauour redeemed Thou requirest no sacrifice that with labour and charge should bee purchased abroad but such as is or should be at home and within me thou expectest no other satisfaction from me but the humiliation of my proud heart and the sorrow of my rebellious soule O wonderfull goodnesse O vnspeakeable mercie What more fauourable termes can be deuised or propounded then that thou wilt accept my submission and reconciliation so as I will aske thee forgiuenesse humbly and freely professe and expresse effectually mine hearty repentance for the manifold sinnes I haue committed against thy divine Maiestie Out of the the apprehension of this louing kindnesse and tender compassion if there were nothing else I ought to melt into teares of griefe breake my heard hart bruize my obstinate spirit which haue transported me so farre and plunged me so deepe into thy displeasure O Lord inable mee whom thou hast ordained a Priest for this purpose to offer daily and duly this acceptable sacrifice vnto thee which I should the more willingly present because it no way intends the destruction of my body but the correctiō of my soule I am only to slay my sensuality to quell my vnruly affections and subdue them to thy holy will for mine own good not to impech nature but to increase grace and for my better incouragemēt to this mortification thou art graciously pleased to vse this protestation that If I iudge my selfe thou wilt not iudge me if I chastise my selfe thou wilt not condemne mee if I execute my owne iust and vnpartiall sentence against mine owne heart the capitall offender thou wilt fauourably spare and mercifully pardon mee for euer O Lord I pray not for my selfe alone but for thy whole Church wheresoeuer dispersed howsoeuer distressed vpon the face of the earth As I pray that thou wilt bee mercifull to mee particularly so I beg also that thou wilt be fauourable to Sion vniuersally Being a member of that mystical body whereof thy Christ is the head so long as I haue spirituall life in me I cannot but resent such afflictions as any of thy chosen do sustaine ô Lord I pray thee for Ierusalem the kingdom wherein I liue that peace may be within her walls prosperity in her palaces I cannot but out of honest affection wish well to my brethren neighbours and companions that their persons may be protected their walls of wood or stone reedifyed fo often as neede requireth that not for necessity onely but for comelinesse also But I must still professe that I regard the Case for the 〈◊〉 sake which is compassed therewith the Common-wealth for thy house and that portion of thy Church that is preserued therein I respect chiefely Sion thy darling and the ioy of the whole earth My precious goods are imbarqued in that ship What fortune betides them I am contented shall befall me I will sympathise reioyce and mourne with them vpon all occasions I doe acknowledge no neerer affinity no deerer consanguinity no better fraternity then is Christianity nay my spirituall kindred is of more esteeme with mee 〈◊〉 any naturall or legall coniunction whatsoeuer O Lord shew thy fauor to Sion for thy good pleasures sake shee hath no other motiue to induce thee no other mediator to intercede with thee Bee gracious to her for his sake in whom thou art well pleased Be pleased of thy selfe thine owne goodnes for thy selfe thine owne glory to shew this loue vnto thy Spouse though foule in her owne nature yet faire by thy gracious acceptation These graces O Lord which I begge zealously for my selfe and others I beseech thee to grant mercifuly that I may 〈◊〉 thee with prayse and prayse thee with loue that I may thankefully acknowledge thy gracious goodnesse and in testimony thereof render vnto thee all honour and glory all manner of prayses and thankes all the dayes of my life euen for euer and euer Amen FINIS Bern. ad frat in Mon. Tertul. de Paenit Aug. in 〈◊〉 51. Chrysost. in hunc Psalmum Psal. 103. Melius impressum quà m expressum innotescit In his non capit intelligentia nisi quantum attingit 〈◊〉 Bern. in Cant. 3. Qui non gustauerit non intelliget quà m 〈◊〉 sapit mel Aug. in Psal. 30. Rom. 5. Miserationum Dei nec magnitudo mensurari nec multitudo numerari potest Basil. Ierem. 31. Psal. 38. Iob. 7. Iohn 13. Rom. 12. 〈◊〉
Loue it selfe in the abstract The extent of thy goodnesse loue and mercy is such as hath no bounds the depth is such as hath no bottome The influence of it will make me feele that which no eloquence can vtter no intelligence can containe No man can tell how sweete hony is but hee that tasteth it I see O Lord great fruite of thy rich roote of Mercy For were not thy mercy exceeding great few or none could liue here the life of grace or there the life of glory Looke how many Saints there be in heauen or on earth by inchoation here in perfection there So many worthy examples so many infallible demonstrations there are of thine vnspeakeable mercy without which they should 〈◊〉 haue perished and sunke downe to Hell If therefore thy Iustice lift vp it selfe as the high Mountaines to eclipse the light of thy gracious countenance from mee I will raise my selfe yet higher in confidence of thy Truth which reacheth to the clouds and thy Mercy which mounts euen to the heauen of heauens I will frame this comfortable consequence to my distressed soule if thy mercy bee magnified aboue thy Iustice it must needs bee farre aboue my transgressions O Lord I haue caused my sinne to abound farre beyond the bankes and bounds of thy Law but it is thy property to pardon and the property of thy Mercy where sinne abounds there to superabound Thy mercy doth euen crosse and controule thy Iustice and as the highest Orbe doth by violence carry with it the inferior Spheres against their proper inclinations and motions So the force of thy powerfull mercy doth ouerrule my naturall and wilfull courses running to wickednesse and in that race hasting to iust condemnation My sinnes therefore how great soeuer cannot stop the flowing of thy vast Ocean of Mercy When I fall into computation and comparison of my sinnes on the one side and thy mercies on the other I finde by diuine Arithmetike and the true Iacobs-staffe to my singular comfort that my sinnes how great and how many soeuer yet may bee both measured and reckoned but on the other part that neither the magnitude nor the multitude of thy mercies can be either fathomed or numbred I beg thy great Mercy because thy lesser mercies will not doe the turne which my miserable condition requires For they may ease me of lesser miseries of afflictions in body of distresses in estate of other incumbrances in the world but it is thy larger Mercy that must forgiue not my lesser only but my greater sinnes which haue prouoked thy iust and heauy indignation against me Thy wayes O God are not as mans wayes nor thy mercies as mans mercies Mans mercy is short and scant mingled with hardnesse and maymed with sundry imperfections In ciuill matters some man will forgiue the interest but not the principall some man will forgiue the halfe but not the whole debt some man will forbeare to demand the debt yet will not forgoe the Bond hee will keepe that to curbe his debtor vpon all occasions In matters criminall one will forgiue the fault but not the punishment another will remit a part but not all the penalty a third will forgiue but not forget the iniury But thy Mercy O Lord is great large free and absolute intire and indefinite or rather infinite Thou forgiuest both the fault and punishment royally and really all is acquitted and discharged at once in accomplishment of that comfortable clause in the cloze of thy new Couenant Thou wilt remember our iniquities no more The multitude of my sinnes occasions me to parallel them with the multitude of thy mercies that there may bee a medicine for each malady a salue for euery sore I touch still vpon one and the same string though with some variety because the meditation and modulation of this mercy of thine is as sweet Musicke in mine eare and a ioyfull Iubile in my soule I striue to expresse one and the same thing in diuers words or phrases great mercy and a multitude of mercies being all one in sence and meaning for great mercy comprehends a multitude of mercies and a multitude of mercies amounts to one great masse of mercy The greatest mercy that the greatest person can doe to the most miserable wretch vpon earth is not to bee compared to the least of thy mercies which thou affoordest to the holiest man that liues in regard of the infinite disproportion that is betweene the Offendor and the Offended the Creator of Heauen and earth and dust and ashes Howbeit euen in thine infinite mercy as it hath relation to sinfull man there be degrees whereof we cannot better take the skantling then by our greater or lesser offences committed against thy diuine Maiesty for the Law of gratitude amongst men teacheth mee to acknowledge that thy loue is greater to them to whō thou forgiuest greater thē to such as thou acquitest of smaller debts Therefore as my more heynous sinnes at the Tribunall of thy iustice do call for seuerer punishment so at thy throne of mercy which is aboue thy seate of iustice and to which I appeale as to thy Court of last resort they begge and craue for thy more great and tender compassions Debt is a burthen and a great debt is an heauy burden hee that beares an honest minde cannot be quiet in minde so long as hee continues in debt My sins are my debts and that scoare runnes still in my minde whereon I haue runne so fast and so farre I professe truly that my sins haue gone ouer not my body only but my head also and that they are a burden too heauy for mee to beare I know O Lord thou keeper of men that thou markest what is amisse in me thou scorest vp my sinnes my wilde and wandring thoughts my vaine and wicked words my foule and filthy actions thou keepest a day and a debt-booke of them to charge mee by way of account whensoeuer it pleaseth thee thou settest them downe in capitall and red letters to declare thine anger thou grauest them with the poynt of a Diamond and writest them with a pen of Iron both in thy Registry of Heauen and in the Tablet of mine own conscience on earth placing on the right side thereof the straight rules of thy Law and mine Obliquities on the left each as a foile to set forth the other Debts must either be paid or forgiuen else they cannot be discharged Pay O Lord I cannot I am become bankrupt I am not able no not by way of composition to answer thee one for a thousand Therefore it remaines onely that I beseech thee whose propertie it is to haue mercy and forgiue to crosse this debt-booke to wipe out the score to cancell the hand-writing and deface the record that is against me to put away and blot out my transgressions that there may remaine no memory of them either to prouoke thy heauy vengeance or to affright my
distressed soule Wash mee wash mee againe and againe or wash me throughly from mine iniquity and cleanse mee from my sinne As my sinnes being in nature of debts are registred in thy book and set vpon thy score so like spots and staynes they blemish and deface the Image of thy diuine nature ingrauen in my soule at the Creation of it in such sort as thou canst hardly discerne it to be thy workemanship and therefore I intreate thee to wash me often and throughly that I may appeare cleane and holy in thy pure and piercing eyes There is nothing so pure O Lord as thou art in thy diuine nature nothing so foule as I am by naturall and actuall corruption Wherefore I thinke nothing too much to bring the most defiled thing on earth to the 〈◊〉 Essence in heauen and that makes me to beg againe and againe that thou wilt wash me againe and againe Sinne is filthy to thinke of more filthy to speake and heare of most filthy to act and commit there is nothing in it or any part or passage of it but vilenesse basenesse and filthinesse All the washings in thy Leuiticall Law were types and figures of this Spirituall washing in the blood of the Lambe slaine from the beginning of the world Wash me O Lord with the water of thy grace with that water whereof whoso drinketh shall neuer thirst wash mee with the water of mine owne teares with the water of thy Word with the water of thy Sacraments I know O Lord that vnlesse thou wash mee I can haue no part or portion in the. e Wherefore I beseech thee to wash not my feete onely but my head also and all the parts and members of my body yea to rince and scowre my soule and all the powers and faculties thereof that I may present both soule and body an holy and acceptable sacrifice vnto thee It is thy blessed busines O Christ to 〈◊〉 me in this worlde that thou maist render me spotlesse to thy Father in another world I sinne daily and therefore had neede of daily washing I sinne continually and therfore had 〈◊〉 of continuall washing for the word including a multiplication of washing doth imply a multiplication of sinning For if my soule lothing the filth and mire wherewith shee hath soiled her selfe euen to vglinesse take a course by the teares of contrition for the cleane washing of her face how soone doth the old dirt of sinne spurt into her visage againe So that the businesse of the soule in this life if it be a life of repentance is neuer at an end being indeed nothing else but the washing of that which is foule and the fouling of that which was washed There be as it is reported in the story of nature certain flying fishes whose wings by flying waxe dry and being dry lose their flying so as they must euer and anon returne to the Sea by the moisture thereof to enable their flight againe Euen so my soule washed in the lauer of regeneration and mounting vp towards heauen through this wicked world her wings euen her best purposes cogitations and conceptions easily grow dry by the contagion of earthly conuersation vnlesse they bee often bathed and moistened in the waters of repentance to carry her thorow to her iournies end So then my case and condition is such as in regard of many sports howerly falling and deepely staining my ill fauoured and disfigured Soule 〈◊〉 haue iust cause to pray earnestly that I may bee both often and throughly washed and by thee who canst alone make me cleane and clense me from my sinnes As I haue a great debt to be discharged much filthinesse to bee washed so haue I a loathsome Leprosie of sinne to be clensed wherefore I pray thee O Lord to clense mee from from my sinnes This Leprosie and the cure of it were shadowed out and figured also by sundry purgations clensings in thy Leuiticall law all poynting to that blood of the Lambe whereby my sinnes are purged The Leprosie as Physiicans tell vs is an hereditary disease descending from the Father to the Child An ignominious and odious disease banishing the Leper from all company a contagious disease spreading from man to man 〈◊〉 then the Plague a dull and stupid disease that makes him insensible altogether and a dangerous or rather desperate disease 〈◊〉 or not at all to be cured In all which 〈◊〉 sinne may fitly bee resembled to a 〈◊〉 for sinne comes by propagation from our first Parents to all their posterity It separates vs from thy presence from the company of thy 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 of Angels and all good men It infecteth others and poyloneth not onely with the breath but with the sight of it too It benums vs so as wee feele not thy fearefull iudgements It is vtterly incurable otherwise then by the blood of the Lambe It hath been obserued that the teares of a Vine when it bleedes are a very good medicine for curing of the bodily Leprosie 〈◊〉 so the teares of the heart 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 and lies lowe as doth 〈◊〉 Vine that 〈◊〉 and mournes in humility for sinne auaile much to 〈◊〉 clensing of this Leprosie of the soule My sinne as a Leprosie doth ouerspread both my soule and body from the crowne of the head to the sole of the foote from the highest faculty of my vnderstanding to the lowest affection of my will there is no sound part in mee my disease is growne to the height to full ripenesse or rather foule rottennesse it hath put out the scabbe as they say by enormious and scandalous actions Wherefore I beseech thee who art the prime and soueraigne Physician to looke vpon me with the eye of pitty and to clense and cure mee of my Leprous sinne and sinfull Leprosie 2. I know mine owne wickednesse and my sinne is euer before me or my sinne is euer against me BEfore the Prophet Nathan was sent as a speciall Bailife to summon me by a writ ad meliùs inquirendum I cast mine eye carelesly I did not fixe it fully I looked slightly and superficially as in passage not sadly and mournefully vpon my grieuous sins I did not behold them so seriously as I ought to haue done I saw but the Epitome or grosse summe of them I did not viewe them in the large volume written at length or rathere painted out as now they are in their true shapes and colours Euery man by the light of nature must needs see somewhat of this kinde in the glasse of his owne conscience but through the corruption of nature no man is willing to take a perfect suruay and make a full portraiture of his own transgressions There is in man an affected ignorance and blindnesse in this behalfe and who so blinde as he that will not see who so ignorant as hee that will not know As wee put off the euill day so long as we can so we put by the euill obiect so farre as wee may