Lady To stand as mute at Joynted Baby And was surpriz'd to hear the Gabble Of this connext and joyned Rabble By which the women thought her guilty With hand and knee they hilty-tilty Most shamefully did her assault Which made her Royal Back to halt VVhilst antedated Lord stood by And like Boy whipt did snob and cry At last Old Man as fierce as Hector Having more of Henbane then of Nectar Lay'd hands upon the Ladies Garments Jewels and Rings and her Attirements And Gouty Shank was held aloff And new Silk-Stockins plucked off In fine they stript her to her Smock So fine you might have seen her Nock Then much despis'd by bawling Litter Which made before their Chops to twitter When all Indignities were over In German Vest they did her cover With Justacore and a Night-Rayle And Pettycoat all black to th' â—ayle The same reserved by Ships master VVhen she escap'd from forraign Cloyster Thence brought 'fore Godfrey not of Bullion For this did use her like a Scullion And so by Beadle fell and Hostile He sent her to the Gate-house Bastille Where being come the Gates flew open For to receive Dutch Fro Van Slopen As great Companion come to dwell In Prison close much like to Hell The noise of Princess close restraint Sent persons great to hear her Plaint But when they heard her to discourse They netled were like Pamper'd Horse And did applaud her high-bred Parts Not to be equaliz'd at Marts Or Ladies some with face like Maple That spend their time in tittle-tattle With great respect they did her treat And sent in Money Wine and Meat And Bribes to Keeper to be civil As he that Candle holds to Devil Where I will leave her to her Fate Still great though in confin'd estate And for her high-conceited Lord When Reputation he had scor'd On Tick and borrow then he went To Chamber where he Body pent Believing German Knight would call His Lordship to account for all His base abusing Princely Dame And using her with so much shame And Parents full with shame and ire Did mope and dote like Cats by fire But stay my Muse now hand is in Ore Boots and Shooes thou'lt never lin Though thou be grown as dull and weary As Sculler at the Laboring Ferry So cease at present and let end For this time working feet befriend Till second part in Canto quaint Shall write of Princess close restraint How long in prison she did stay And who for Liberty made way How she was brought 'fore Learned Bench And treated like her self not Wench And how she in most learned guise Defence did make to those are wise Pleading her Cause like fluent Cato Or Advocate with a bald Pate-o And was with great applause acquitted And Father Son and all out-witted This shall be sung in the next Part As second course to cheer your heart The Princess to her Lord a Farewel THere was a time when Skinker Perkin Leapt into Prince from a Freeze Jerkin Time also was as 't has been sed VVhen Fryar Bacon's brazen Head Spoke monstrous things but We do tell Of stranger things that have befel How pretty Monkey in disguise Held Pescod in her Mouth as prize Oh fatal time how couldst thou be So cruel in thy Managery More fierce then erst thou wast to Fellow Who though in rage with Drink more mellow Did all his forepast Fancies deem Of Drunken brain the passing steem Oh my sweet Pescod prethee think Like him that all thy hopes was drink FINIS ERRATA PAg. 2. lin 8. read Check l. 14. r. properer p. 3. l. 17. r. Trance l. 22. r. Trance p. 4. l. 2. r. aw'd p. 11. l. 10. r. shipt p. 23. l. 9. r. dust Who made a good Bargain had he received the benefit * Observe he was well acquainted with Ignoramus * Or place where he would have had one * As 't is elegantly exprest by the Author of Hero and Leander * A Simile much used by him * Note that Knights errant of Yore used to make such-like Speeches to their Swords or Horses as you may see several in the Reverend Legends of Don Quixot * Love is always childish * Take heed of Fascination * Whereby you may note he intended to be a Courtier * Observe that Phrensie runs in a blood * One that traded very much in that Commodity in Purchasing of the Kings Lands * Note that his Friends profest Physick * Id est Coffee * A fit Allusion * Of late there hath been many such examples * As these late times can testifie * Thâ— best 〈◊〉 may borrow * A Simile fit enough for the subject * As it too truly fâ—ll out * Would he had taken the counsel * The same that Peters plaid with the Butchers wife * The more 's the pity he made not sure on 't * He was always too modest * It has always been the custome of Knight-Errants to go in quest after their Doxeys * Like some of our Modern Hectors Good advice in a fierce Assault * A very ancient Game and much in use * Belike he came out of the Princess Stove much like to Cornelius his Tub. An unkinde Bed-fellow * Blame him not for he came from hot service * He might safelyer have cunnde a Ship then her A Princely Pardon * He scorn'd to sell places a custome now very à la mode * The Fleeces of Wool taken off from Scabbed Sheep 31 Edw. 3. Cap 5. * As great men use to do by their Duns * The common Hangman * A Story so well known it need not be told again * A Name she much used to call her Lord by
loughty Sir If my Lady-Princess love me As I do her who can reprove me I am a man 't is true o' th' Quill And use Blank Bonds to sit and fill But what of that Crispine the Cobler Was lov'd of Princess and did down-jobble her And many more I can relate That have crept into the same state Been Generals made Governors of Islands Lords of great Castles steep as High-lands And who can tell but I may be Vicegerent in High Germany And have my Squadrons drest in Buff With Pistol Sword and Sable Muff When Friend saw Youth as fully bent As Cutting Dick when 's money 's spent That stands at corner of Hide-Park Robbing both Poor and Rich i' th' dark He did forbear to reason further As much as Rabby ' gainst self-murther And said My Lord pray no more words Unless of Cheescakes Cream and Curds To be devour'd on Wedding-day When you are fine as Green Poppay But by the way to clear all doubts As Maiden washes Infants Clouts And prevent stain on antient house Worser then Beast on Cloak call'd Lowse Lest Lady of the ancient Mannor Call'd Bloomsberry where lives no Tanner Should dress her self in Princely shape And you deceive like Jack-an-Ape Therefore Take my advice and be not slow But straight unto the Tower go See beast there Couchant called Lyon That fawns on Princes when cast eye on Whereby you 'll know if Princely born Or else his stern he 'll whisk in scorn Quoth he No more of that fair friend of Steel Such Tryal DEAR must never feel For I do know she 's Princess stalk As sure as Dames know Grays-Inne walk And further to confirm the truth Of my believe conceive me Youth She 'll not consent or me admit With her to play at Game Treytrip Till her great Riches do come over And Land within the Port of Dover Besides in penance once she went And met fierce Beast that was unpent Who humbly kneel'd as Friend not Foe And all ore-lickt her sweaty Toe So ended Gallants high Discourse Being resolv'd to run his course As is the Dog when set at Bear Or Groom attempting Ladies Ware Quoth he to 's Friend Sir I cann't tarry For Princess I must forthwith marry Be close as night firm as the ground For Gag receive two hundred pound But not till money comes to London Then I am made or else I 'm undone But till I come to her Estate Be our Companion and our Mate For I resolve when we take Court And great Men to us do resort Thy little Legs shall strut in Hall And thou be call'd our General Be Captain of our Guard of Horse Of Troopers tall fiercer then Moss Shalt use our Court Goods Plate Money And Princess too excepting Coney When friend had heard this proffer great And how the Knight did him intreat And offer'd all ev'n to his Jerkin Excepting lovely Princess Merkin He was full glad that by the end He had taken such a real Friend And thanks to him he then did utter In manner smooth like new-made Butter Like Presbyterian Independent When both resolv'd to have an end on 't They in their Canting Hymns did sing And hand in hand did murther King So Daddy Mammy Friend and Knight In Judgement one did all unite And did agree without long tarry That Knight should Lady-Princess marry But as the Council was adjourning The Lady-sister enter'd mourning Acquainting them that forreign Knight With cole-black hair eyes like spright Had at the house enquiry made For Germane Princess and like Blade Or Gallant a la mode did swear That heart from body he would tear Of him that durst crack Princess Nut Or dare with her to go to Rut And wheresoe'er he found the Man Should dare to usher Princess hand His Arms he 'd cut off to the bones And whisk out Laboring-Dog-Prick Stones Withal he 'd give two hundred pound Princess to see on English ground That he might carry her to Cullen With greater Joy then Anne from Bullen Have you beheld a Millers Coat The white Beard of a Rammish Goat A New Thin Cheese or Harry Groat Or New-turn'd Milk that 's very naught So pale and thin lookt Princess servant When he had heard the fierce Knights errant Believing that his Hangers by For bold attempt should surely die The House was all in Chitty Chatty And Heart of Knight went Pitty Patty At length arose the little Captain To Corps de Guard before mad Chieftain Courage Sir Knight quoth he be bold And quit not Princess strong tayl-hold For by my flaming Sword of Steel This Brave shall Doughty Mettle feel Bid Lackey-Boy go call a Coach While I the Knave on Spit do broach The Coach being come Boot put down And Lackey tayling Princess Gown Knight put her in as well as able And drove to house of Dean Dunsiable As tall as Meg Westminster Lass And of the make of Caiaphas Where he agreed to take a Room For her and him the good Bridegroom But had you seen the Mimick Gesture Of Reading Priest in his long Vesture How humbly he did scrape and bow And lickt his Lips like Calf by Cow With Hat held under arm like Bag-pipe Stood he upright like man in Moon-light Acquainting in his Gesture featly That he could marry them most neatly And Churches more could have then Hearers For to assist such Love-Pickeerers And having ask'd advice of Priest First charging him for to be hiss't Whether 't was lawful fit or just That Scrivener should at Princess thrust Pray think what said the Priest hereat Indeed he spoke the words of Pilate Saying I find no fault therein For Copulation is no sin For by such Jobs as these I 'm richer Then twelve Apostles or St. Peter At last the Gallants took their farewel Of Priest in Coat Canonical Having 'forehand paid durt for Lodging For he and she to play hodge-dodge in If not prevented by Tongue-blabber Or Information of Dutch Swabber But being return'd again to London Enquiring out what Spyes had then done They found there fresh pursuits by Letters To look out Princess though in fetters With promise fresh to give more Money To him should tell where lay Dear Honey At this the Knight was sore affrighted And star'd like Beast anew bedighted Knowing not whither he should go To shun pursuit of cruel Fo. The Council being call'd agen And sate as close as sheep in Pen It was resolv'd at pale Knights instance For to prevent a further mischance That marry'd they should be in Church And lie no more like Dogs at Lurch As Loyal-suff'ring Cavaleers Were lugg'd about like Pigs by th' ears By people then and yet call'd Saints Upon pretence of great Complaints And brought to Haberdashers Hall Where with Contracts they did 'um mall And Moyer with his Ferret-Eyes As red as Low-Dutch Ladies Thighs Would with one blow of Wooden Hammer Conclude sequester and not stammer So
future Good And how his Lady was all Wood But said they ended in pure Love As time to him would shortly prove Being thus satisfide at large As City-Dames in husbands Barge With Tommy Willy James and Jack While good men cry Pray what d' you lack The Father with content fetcht down In Bags full stuffed many a Crown Bid him to treat her like her self And let her not to want for Pelf Or Garments new the best in fashion Or Hide-Park-air for recreation And to attire his Lordships Body With Silks and Sattins very hoddy And Lodgings new in Strand to take And Preparations great to make To entertain his Royal Kindred VVhich now his little Palace hindred The Lord with Money in his hand Did trip it neatly to the Strand And house by house enquiry made Of Lodging void for Princely Blade At length he took up Princess Stall In Durham-yard at Golden Ball And thither she in trice was brought As safe as Cheese in Apple-Loft And in good sooth she did appear Like Sol in his bright Hemisphear With Gold and Silver all bedight And in a Case of Gold the Knight VVell shap'd by Painter of Signe-post Like Antick in gilt VVood embost Hung by her side when enter'd Lodging To shew she 'd caught a City-Gudgeon Where being lodg'd on the next day The Trades-men set in good array Did humbly crave his Lordship straight For License on his Corps to wait One to serve Shooes another Linnen Stockins a third by Loom or Spinning A fourth to fit his Pate with Bevers A fifth with Swords as sharp as Clevers A sixth to make his Periwigs A seventh to teach the newest Jigs An eighth his Garments for to make A ninth to cure the pain Tooth-ake A tenth Sweet-powder for to bring For Hair and Beard and Ladies Thing A ' leventh and twelfth to furnish Meat As Flesh or Fish old Ling or Neat. Gentlemen quoth this worthy Knight To me this is a pleasant sight And sweeter far then Hampshire-Honey In places sold for store of Money For I rejoyce to see my Servants For to attend and run on Errants And as Dame Fortune gave to me So I to you as you shall see Your places take which is no hard thing To be admitted without Farthing Next day the Knight did want a Gown To dress him in not Russet brown Or scribling Coat more rude then Freezes That 's homely made of Villain Fleeces But Indian-Dress of Pink and Green Fellow to that on Great Back seen Which being on he lookt as stout As Gem well fasten'd in Hogs Snout And did contemn his truest friends That did assist him in his ends And slight he did the Art of 's Pen And all converse with vulgar men And Captain True-Friend was laid by And slighted with a scornful eye The Owner of the Silver Sword Of Weapon could hear ne'er a word These the Lord hated by pure Argent As much as broken Cit a Sergeant And at Bo-peep with them did play At home to morrow not this day Sometime employ'd in great Concerns When he was cutting Princess Kerns At other times dispatching Orders To 's Stewards on the German Borders Requiring an account of Wealth And of his Cousin-Princes health But while in Puff-Paste Lord doth strut And studies onely Back and Gut Dame Fortune wheel'd her tayl about And turn'd his Lordship to a Lowt For Shooemaker by a Petition In Court did humbly pray admission To serve them with both Boots and Shoon As well to ride as for to run But Princess seeing the Address Of bold Sir Hugh she 'gan to guess His Errand thither telling Lord He Calve-skins cut upon her word And that she could not fancie him ' Mongst all the Race of Cobling Men. The answer of the Princely Spouse Hugh and his Bones did forthwith rouse For he did kindle like a Taper And lookt as pale as any Paper And having vindication made Of Paring-Knife and Awle sharp Blade Goodness of Leather Wax and Thred And able Work-man called Ned He packt up Tools and went his way With stiffned Whiskers Beard of Whay Contriving in his Horny Pate Malice against the Lords Bed-mate The next day Lord went to Hide-Park With him his Princess light not dark For she did shine as bright as Sun But Lord did look as sad as Dun When but one Hector doth appear To help expence of following year Though they were treated in the Park By Ladies great and many a Spark Giving right-hand to Royal Madam And great respect which much did glad ' um But coming home unto their Court Sir Hugh to Lord did straight resort Told him he could relate sad Story Would make him weep in all his Glory And curse the time that ever he His Hawke at Hobby did let flee Enough to put him into Lax Not to be staid by Coblers Wax The Knight did wonder what he meant And praid him to declare intent Of his address for he did make His Teeth to chatter Knees to shake Why then quoth he your Lady gay Is Kentish breed and Crowders Spray And marri'd is to a Shooe-maker That is no Cobler or Translator And hath to boot take 't not in Dudgeon Another Husband call'd a Surgeon And you in order make the third For Princess is not worth a This made the Lord to fume and fret And water drop like Sable Jet For he did whine and howl like Dog When at his Tayl is Wooden Clog And sad mishap did oft recount Of this to-be-imagin'd Count. Have you beheld the Jack-an-Apes With Bears and Dogs his constant Mates When Horse was set upon by Dogs Being resolv'd to pluck off â—ugs Of little Gentleman in Coat How gallantly with them he fought Sometimes the Horse was down and he Was brought upon his little Knee Then up agen he 'd get to Grupper And with his Jaws begin to mutter Thence to the head and so to side And could not at one place abide At length being tir'd as well as able Crept to his Noose and shut the Saddle So gude Mas John 'twixt hope and fear Was entertain'd with the like Chear And I dare say by his fierce screeches He Atkiniz'd his Wedding-Breeches The Lackey-Boy was sent away To Father and to Mother Nay His Sister too the good Match-maker Of Story true must be Partaker Who being come the Lord did tell His sad mischance which made 'em yell And to exclaim ' gainst Germane Lady That had abus'd poor little Baby At last they went into Bed-chamber Where Princess lay like Dog in Manger Till aged Sire did her importune The truth to tell if such a fortune Or where she was a Germane Princess Or who had taken her by th' Inches 'Fore Son did enter Lower Quarters Or who wore Senior Coblers Garters When he did marry her in Church And who she lam'd and brought to Crutch And who it was besides did scrub her And what the Surgeon was did probe her This fierce assault did make the