though not particularly at this time rehearsed for every good thing for my Soul and Body here and hereafter as far as ever the purpose of thy Grace extended when thou saidst I will be thy God and that all that Goodness and Truth may follow me all my days and for ever Rom. 8. 32. And I willingly offer up my self to thy whole Will as thou shalt from time to time reveal it in the same word of thy Grace and do covenant Subjection thereto in thy strength through the Mediation of Jesus Christ and supply of thy Spirit And upon thy own Encouragement in thy Promise made to me in that same Covenant which thou madest with my Father Abraham and sealed it to him and his Seed that thou wouldst be his God and the God of his Seed and caused the Man-child of eight days old to receive the sign of that Covenant in his Flesh which Blessing thou hast now brought over to me a Gentile by Christ in whom thou saist Jew and Greek Male and Female are all one in Christ I do again offer up my Child who has been already baptized into thy Name relying on thee to make good thy Covenant in Christ to her together with my self in every Branch thereof which I have through thy favour and Grace entred into and spread before thee this day that she also may have a place in thy House and partake of all the Privileges and Inheritance of thy Chosen And now O Lord God what shall I say to thee Who am I And what is my House that thou hast brought me hitherto All Praise be to thy glorious Name ever-living Jehovah the Father Son and Spirit Glory be to thee O Father who hast begotten me again to a lively Hope who hast drawn me to Jesus Christ whom thou deliveredst up for me to be my Ransom and hast made me to recieve him and in him to call thee my reconciled Father Glory be to thee O Eternal Son of the Father who camest into Flesh and undertookest the great Office of Mediatorship between a righteous God and sinful Man and hast transacted a Covenant of Peace for me and perfected it in thy own Person by thy Death and Resurrection And Glory be to thee O Eternal Spirit of the Father and Son who hast awakened my ear to hear the joyful sound of Reconciliation to God through the Blood of the Lamb which was slain from the beginning of the World who hast been pursuing me and didst never give over till thou hadst convinced my heart and conquered my Will to a willing Surrender of my self up to and a laying hold upon the Covenant of Grace held forth to Sinners in the Volume of thy Book Now O Lord God let all the words of thy Grace be effectually applied and established to me thy Servant Pardon all my sins and my failings and all my unsuitableness of heart while I have been before thee musing and taking thy Name and Covenant in my mouth and writing it with my own hand in thy presence and as a Fruit of thy Covenant-Grace and Truth let my approach to thee be accepted and prosper for which end I have delivered up my self and all that is mine with full purpose of heart according to all that I have said before thee this day and with an holy Awe of thy Presence in this great Work in confidence and hope of thy pardoning succouring and assisting Grace I lie at the Foot-stool of thy Mercy and call Heaven and Earth to witness that I have chosen thee to be my God and thy Will in all things to be my Inheritance and my delight and the matter of my pursuance all my days upon the ground and promise which thou hast said Hos 2. 23. I will say to them which were not my people thou art my people and they shall say Thou art my God I have said it and do say it and do leave this Covenant in the hand of my Mediator to see it fulfilled to me and by me through all the days of my Infirmity and Warfare till I come to behold his face as he is and this vile Body of mine be made like to his glorious Body In reliance on which relief and blessed hope and help I cling upon this Covenant of Free Grace in which I do both take and give as I have said and do subscribe it irrevocably with my hand Henry Dorney Do not say O grumbling Unbelief The Soul chides Vnbelief that these are nothing but compiled words of Humane Invention I tell thee as far as they are only my invention I do loath them but the Spirit of God doth witness with my Spirit that amongst these words there hath been some hunger after God some awe of his Presence some love to be his devoted Servant some prizing of the excellency of a pure Life of Faith some holy Convictions of the importance and necessity at least of such an attempt as this to bring God and my Soul nearer together And therefore though there is much chaffiness of a dead heart yet I cannot gratifie my doubts and unbelief so far as to conclude there is no Wheat in the heap and I refer my self desirously and willingly to the heart-knowing Eye of him who has his Fan in his hand to blow away all the Chaff from my thoughts and words and to create in me a clean heart and pure language also and to gather what there is of secret panting after him into his own Garner and put my inward groanings after him how weak and faint soever into his Bottle and therefore I must and by his help will praise him for any Crumbs that fall from his Table and that I have any Stomach to eat them and any desire after larger Morsels My Redeemer is bountiful his Breasts are full and will not suffer a hungry Child to draw nothing but Wind. I remember well what he said to the Woman of Samaria If thou knewest the gift of God and who it is that saith to thee Give me to drink thou wouldst have asked of him and he would have given thee living water I have asked of him and have had his favour to wait on him now several days together and will he return my Bucket altogether empty This is not his custom The Kingdom of God is like Seed sown which springs up and grows with an insensible motion and yet a growing motion Mark 4. 26 27. He proceeds in the method of his own Word in which Word he saith Seek and ye shall find for every one that seeketh findeth and shall I say my Seekings are lost My Way is not hid from God when his Path is hid from me he hath said They that wait on the Lord shall renew their strength which I have obliged my self to do and therefore though he humble me to preserve a watchful Appetite and to prevent some unhealthy Surfeit which he can discern in my Constitution growing upon me better than I yet I know I shall
my own management and power to exercise the same This is the true Life of Faith this is the way of walking up and down in the Name of the Lord. When I actually acknowledge every Measure of Spiritual Strength to hold its Tenure from Jesus Christ singly and wholly and rest confidently upon him for it and that because he hath promised both Grace Glory and every good thing judging him faithful who hath promised and owning him thereon for my Inheritance and my self nothing but what he is for me Then I may be said to trust Jesus Christ and to trust in him only I trust him upon his Word to be All for me which I would spiritually be and I trust in him to enjoy the same through the Faith of my Interest in him and his abounding Grace and Unction This cuts the heart of Self-Pride spiritual Surfeiting and Slothfulness when I live every moment at the mercy of another even Jesus Christ both for Justifying Righteousness and every Influence thereof by the immediate Breathings of his Spirit according to his good pleasure having not the power so much as to make one Hair white or black but I must wholly work by his Hands see by his Eyes and in his Light behold the Light What more powerful Inducement can there be to Self-denial than this Boasting is excluded because Christ in his own Person and by his own Spirit doth whatsoever is done for me or in me Here lies the Mystery and Labour of Faith which the meer Notion thereof can never reach unto so as to improve the same to a self-denying Activity for God in the paths of Godliness and Travel towards Zion There is in our dear Lord Jesus Christ spiritually not personally communicated to Believers a two-fold Excellency to his Redeemed as he is their Portion His Essential Power Righteousness Goodness and Perfection in the Godhead and his proper Humane Nature personally united thereunto Col. 2. 9. and neither of these considered as such can be communicated unto the Children of Men his Person cannot be divided imparted or broken And there is another Excellency flowing from the former by way of Influence and inward Vertue communicated to the hearts of the Redeemed by Regeneration which formeth reneweth and quickneth the New Man the new Creature in the Soul The first of these though it cannot in a strict sense be communicated yet it is wholly by Covenant given to the Saints Isa 49. 8. So that God in his vast Essential Infiniteness is their God and his ve-Body that was dead and is now alive was also given to the Elect Isa 9. 6. and is become theirs by Covenant and they enjoy it in that Right though it remains personally to be his own and not theirs but for them to all Eternity the Excellency of which God and Man in the Perfection of both Natures is so far reckoned and imputed theirs by Covenant-Union and Mystical Ingrafture as may perfectly deliver them from all Evil and fill them with all Righteousness Purity and Perfection which Creature-capacity can take in for the enjoying of the Glory of God So that the Person of the Mediator remains distinct from the persons of the Redeemed and are not mixed but united through the Spirit in the Covenant and his Personal Assumption of the Humane Nature by Faith exercised therein Hence it is that the Interest The Advantages of Christ's being without us personally and yet spiritually in us who believe which the Saints have in Christ is enjoyable by them singly through believing which Enjoyment through the spiritual Nature of the Union is as certain strong and sure as whatsoever they enjoy in their own persons by sense and feeling Ephes 3. 17. Rom. 4. 16. And thus Christ as to the Perfection of his Person being without us and above us and yet by the Communication of the Spirit through Faith made near to us and dwelling in us yields much privilege and unspeakable advantage to a Believer viz. 1. The Excellency of a Believer's Portion in Christ is hereby more distinctly viewed the Soul has hereby room to go round about the unspotted Lustre of his Person and View him from head to foot as the Church in the Canticles doth Cant. 5. 10. as the choicest of ten thousands whereas the Glory of the same Christ as far as it appears only in the heart by Operation is much dimmed and sullyed with the defilement that is there and continual Conflicts but considering him seperated far away from sin and sinners Heb. 7. 26. furnished with utmost Perfection and cloathed with Garments of compleat Victory and Beauty in the behalf of his Redeemed This fills their hearts with joy and their mouths with singing 2. He is thereby become also the livelier Object of their Love for the eye affects the heart and nourisheth spiritual Enflamedness towards him Distance 'twixt the Soul and so excellent an Object I say distance of this sort between the Eye and its Object through Propriety in him enamours the Mind and withall it provokes desire towards him Cant. 6. 11. and makes the Soul of a Believer cry out for more nearness Come O my Beloved this desire quickens expectation to rejoyce in hope and leaves no room for a loathing wearisome Fulness in the heart 3. This objective enjoyment of Christ gives foundation for a kindly refuge in him it rationally leads the inward Man to depart from all other selfs and run to this objective self Jesus Christ through the drawing vertue of spiritual Union with him Cant. 1. 4. and thus was Christ typed out by the Cities of Refuge 4. This Enjoyment of Christ by way of Object is also a Fountain of Recovery when the Soul is foiled it can fetch fresh righteousness fresh pardon and be anointed again and again with fresh Oyl Psal 92. 10. as David speaks and seventy seven times a day yea every moment as oft as the heart pants after him 5. 'T is also a Fountain of Ease by pouring out a Complaint into his bosom 'T is great refreshment to have a Friend to whom one may declare ones misery were it only to receive pity from his hands Job 16. 14. but in Christ looked upon by Faith there is a power as well as pity to help be the Affliction and Burden what it will be Heb. 5. 2. and how great soever 6. 'T is a Fountain also of Confidence and hence doth the Prophet Micah in the name of the people of God argue against the Triumph of the Enemy Mic. 7. 7 8. I will look unto the Lord c. and therefore Rejoyce not over me O my enemy though I fall I shall rise again And Christ himself doth teach his people Confidence by his own Example in the day of his suffering Isa 50. 8. Rom. 8. 33 34. in that his Father was near to justifie him 7. Christ thus taken up helps against the solitariness of our Journey towards Heaven a Believer has a friend to talk with by
not talk with thee and look upon thy face and yet work too The presence of my Christ makes any toil to be perfect freedom Methinks I can easier find in some measure my work throughout the whole Scriptures though that requires also the teachings of the Spirit necessarily than I can know how to compose my heart to keep the Faith of Union and Communion with God fresh and so to work and labour in the strength of that Fellowship whatever I do in the World When I am earnest in Contemplation I fear I fail in the matter of Action when I am acting I fear losing the Marrow of my Communion with my God Here lies Divine Skill to put both these together as being of the same nature and tending to the same end each of them helping and not hindring one another And to this end I desire help from on high to find out my way and method that I may so run that I may at length finish my course with joy The Spring of all Christian Conversation How to hold Communion with God in worldly business is Justifying Faith which cleanseth the Soul and quickens it at the same time by Union with Jesus Christ and as in the order of Nature Life is first infused before any Action of Life can appear so Faith being the accepting and digesting vertue which receives in a way of spiritual digesture Jesus Christ as the Bread of Life doth cleanse and save the Soul which new Life puts forth Actions of its own nature which Actions do add a Perfection of Growth and Manifestation but not of Essence to that new Life of Justification Regeneration and Reconcilement All good works of a holy Conversation are the improving of that Life but neither the cause nor matter of it the cause of it is the meer Grace and Favour of God Ephes 1. 4 5 6. the matter of this Life is the Spirit of Jesus Christ quickning the Soul through Union with it and from thence grows Action as the delightful Exercise of the Life of the new Man So that my more or less improvement must not question the Essence of this Life the least Action notes Life as well as the greatest though the vigour thereof be in a different measure and if I doubt of Life I cannot produce it by Action Leaves will not put life into the Tree but I am in that case by Soul-resigning and Self-renouncing Recumbency of heart to lie down upon Christ to receive Life from him All Life lies in the Root and comes thence by naked believing whereby God through Christ vents his own Life by meer Grace in my Soul that all Actions of Holiness may be no other than the Life of God working in me Now that the Soul may both enjoy its Communion with God and also act with vigour the works of Righteousness in an active Conversation there must be Order and Uniformity in every Action suitable to the Spirit of Communion with God without Order there can be no Peace but Confusion 1 Cor. 14. 23. and without Uniformity also arising from the Root of Union that is between the Action and the Spirit of the Actor there can be no Peace for Unity breeds Peace Ephes 4. 3. by making things different or distinguishable to agree in one by some common and uniting likeness or other And because this Uniformity seems naturally to offer it self to Consideration in the first place I would let a few thoughts pass upon it In all Christan and morally good Actions forbearing to speak of ungodly Actions which are plainly opposite to the Spirit of Holiness no Action though it be in it self materially good ought to be left to its own swinge but always ought to move in the hand of the Spirit as it gives direction by and suitable to the Word The natural motion of a Wheel is to run downwards yet we read Ezek. 1. 19 20 21. that the Spirit of the living Creature being in the Wheels it guided the Wheels from their natural motion to the pleasure and Will of the Spirit that was in the Wheels up or down hither or thither as the Spirit moved them the Spirit and the Wheels were made one in motion by reason of their Union And even so in all good Actions spiritually performed there is a Union betwixt the Principle of Holiness in the new Man and the outward Action that is done which forms the Action into a homogeneous suitableness to that inward Principle and prevents discord betwixt the Action and the Principle Thus it was with Job when he said My heart shall not reproach me Job 27. 6. And hence comes a peaceable Execution of any Actions when the Principle of Holiness does spirit the Action and the Action outwardly manifest a justifying Concurrence with the Principle in and by which it acts the Action and the Principle having the same united Tendency to the Will of God And as Union and Symphony betwixt a gracious efficient Principle and a gracious Action renders it a comfortable Service whatever the work be which is done so the Order betwixt these two do add a further supply to carry on a heavenly Conversation here on Earth The goodness of every Action as to Comfort in the Execution thereof ariseth from Communion with God for whom and to whom that Action and Service is performed Although both be the Exercise of the New Man yet each of them act in their own order the heart is first under true warmth within and then the suitable discoveries do follow Psal 39. 3. While I was musing saith David the fire burned and then spake I with my tongue A good Action loseth its inward beauty when it keeps not its inside order it is numbred amongst dead works and moves but in a ghastly manner when the Spirit within moves not first much like to the irrational Actions of a Man who walks up and down and talks by some strength of fancy when he is in a dead sleep all the while But when the Root of Communion with God bears the Soul forth unto fruitfulness in any Service that Service is comely because it springs naturally from a Spirit of Faith in the New Man and carries along the nature of the New Man in whatsoever is done These two being observed would so carry on the course of Christianity that in the various affairs of this life inward Peace would not be broken there would be readiness at all times to pray praise and rejoyce Thus Abraham and Enoch walked with God and this is the glorious Promise They shall walk up and down in the name of the Lord Zach. 10. 12. All good Actions being thus rooted and ordered have the Glory of God in their eye and run forth in way of duty and carry with them the encouragement of Acceptation with God And although the Actions of such a man may visibly be successless yet his heart is never wrung with disappointment because his secret Communion with and Subjection to
his own Word and bring me up to glorifie him in my Body and Spirit which I trust are his Let me yet farther demand of my self a few Questions which relate to the glorifying of God in my Soul and in my Walk 1. Is it so with me that I cannot be quiet but restless under guilt and distance from God Psal 32. 3 4 5. Do I cry Return O Lord Isa 63. 17. why art thou a Stranger Jer. 14. 8. 2. Do I hanker after more Heart-impressions of the Knowledge of God Exod. 33. 18. and 34. 6. Shew me thy Glory 3. Is the whole Will of God my delight and his Word my daily Diet Jer. 15. 16. Job 23. 12. 4. Do I praise Psal 50. 23. and acknowledge God in daily Providences Gen. 48. 15. Prov. 3. 6. not repining at his Discipline Psal 119. 75. but brought nearer to him by Calamities Isa 17. 7. 5. Do I own him so that the hiding of his face doth darken all other comforts to me Psal 77. 2. and his presence support and satisfie in the absence of earthly comforts Psal 142. 5. as it was with David at Ziglag 1 Sam. 30. 6. 6. Do I so approve my self to God that the Approbation Esteem or Praise of Man doth rather vex than please me when my Conscience within me doth smite me 2 Cor. 10. 18. Rom. 2. 29. 7. In case of guilt and fear Do I cast my self upon the boundless Mercy of God declared in Christ to be pardoned purged and revived as a sufficient Remedy 2 Cor. 12. 9. 8. Do I hanker after pure Communion with God so that my heart pants out Oh that my ways were directed c. Ps 119. 5. Cant. 8. 1. Oh Oh? Ps 38. 9. THESE and such like workings do testifie that God is the highest Good and the Centre of Blessedness and infinitely glorious And in these spiritual Operations the Soul doth declare and witness him to be so and therein do evidence that God is his and he is Gods and hereby is highly privileged God will not take things at the worst with him Matth. 26. 40 41. When such an one is at a loss Mercy will surprize and Deliverance overtake him Ezek. 36. 11. when dull his Ears shall be awakened to hear as the Learned Isa 50. 4. he shall be kept night and day Isa 27. 3. Christ will trim and dress him by the Word Ephes 5. 26. and he will earn towards him Job 14. 15. and be with him in trouble Isa 43. 2 3 c. and God will not be ashamed to be called his God Heb. 11. 16. he will wipe away his Tears teach him by his Spirit pardon his Sins justifie his Person in the Person of Christ and confess him to be his at the last day where he shall see his face with joy Job 33. 26. and ever be with the Lord 1 Thes 4. 17. Happy is the people that is in such a case yea Happy is the people happy is every particular person whose God is the Lord Psal 144. 15. AN APPENDIX A CONFLICT of Mind HOw soon did Peter James and John forget the glorious Transfiguration and fell asleep when the Temptation came How soon is Sight gone when the Sun is eclipsed So it is with me When shall I have skill to discern and resist the beginnings of Decay How soon doth a Troop of Armed Men break in at an unguarded Gap I cannot thrust them out again my self but will rather go to him who hath his Bridle in their Jaws and can both turn them back and also lock the Door against them Oh that I could lift up a Jehoshaphat's Cry to the Lord of Hosts Then would the day clear up and I should yet see my Salvation come flying upon the Wings of the Wind and mounted upon the Glouds for my help I have one hard task to do but O thou to whom nothing is hard reveal thy Will and conquer mine My sore Task and Travel is this How to retain a close Application of Union with God in Christ so as that I may prevent the loss of tender Converse and holy reverential Familiarity and Intercourse with him An immoderate minding of somewhat in it self for ought I can yet see not unlawful has been a thorn in my flesh for several days which has spent much venom against my inward Man but I must not succumb to any Adversary there is no safety but in overcoming Help me throughly O my God at this plunge and thou shalt have the honour of the day I would fain enquire into my Soul how I contracted this Distemper and upon enquiry I find it had such steps as these I was withdrawn I know not how from the tender sight of Christ and influences of spiritual Warmth being damp'd Night came upon me and I considered it not my Soul fell asleep but without any Refreshment I awaked a little now and then but Slumber benummed me that I could not rise up I would fain cry out for help but my words were like an Arrow without Feathers that would not reach the Mark and all this while an earthly and momentany matter of delight solicited my fancy aad proffered some pleasure to my mind and in regard I judged it not materially evil I gave way till it had eaten into my Soul like a Canker and began to build its Nest in the very place which I had lately prepared and devoted for the Entertainment of Christ only It was restless and would not yield to Christ's Supremacy in my Affections but still offered some Moon-light Satisfaction to my Mind insteed of the withdrawn Beams of the Sun and when Christ whispered some Conviction into my heart and made it ake and raised some small yernings after him this Glo-worm glistered upon me and though it had neither light nor heat yet it would pretend a competent Ballance instead of the true spiritual light and warmth which I lately had but now found it was retired at a distance from me for my trial and exercise I discerned the Snare but herein lay my Strait My Judgment told me the matter it self was necessary and that a moderate diligence might be employed about it but neither that nor any thing else must dethrone Christ from the chief Seat in my Affections but I found it had so twisted into my fancy that I knew not how to use my thoughts about it with that moderation as would consist with Christ's supream Government and Sway in my inmost delight and affections So that how to divide between the matter it self and my excessive affection to it to do the one and guard against the other here lies the difficulty The matter on which this inordinate fancy fed it self was something relating to LITERATURE which I judged in its own nature lawful and useful To remedy which distemper I poured out my complaint before the Lord and began to muse the following Meditations How to pursue a lawful thing lawfully Be silent O clamorous unreasonable Sence thy Fancy
Lord is with me and I have Ground of Faith and Hope that I have favour in his Eyes April 24. He expressed himself as followeth I am upon the Term of two great things viz. At the Term of all my great Subjugation to Sin and at the Term of all the Receipt of the Liberty Christ hath purchased at the Term of Sins Thraldom and at the Term of springing up through the Grace of God to eternal Life These are great things and I cannot manage my thoughts about it thorowly through the greatness of it I am going from the Yellings of Sin in this World and the woful effects of it and I am going to a Congregation the only Church of the First-born written in Heaven to visit the Streets of the eternal Grace and Love of God and meet the Company that walk there And methinks I am in a Wood and God hath held me in the Portal a pretty while and here I cannot be perfected for I never had any fittedness but through him that is compleat and is in Heaven And here I abide an Expectant as the poor Man that expected to be put into the Pool and that Angel hath not yet put forth his hand My Body parcheth my Mind parcheth a little Faith and Hope is left me My Tongue begins again to cleave I leave this World as a place where there is no satisfying It may content others a while but it seems rather to hunt me away Body faint Spirit faint in a strange Land my Mind is all in a scatter It will not be so it is so now O Lord help me graciously to wait Death was always spoken of as a dark Valley a place of Darkness and Trial not a place of Joy and shall I find it so Notwithstanding I have hope in the Faith and Love of God by Christ there is a secret Relief That he will turn Death into Life for his own sake and suffer never a clinging Soul to be lopt off and perish I desire no Food my very Nature loaths it my Body is off from all means of help in this World and here I stay through the good hand of God like a poor Stranger I am going to another World and the Fruits of that World will not satisfie the Wants I have here it will not quench my Thirst it will not allay my Drought So that if I have not some Relief to my Soul which is not of this World if I have it not from another World I am undone I cannot speak my thoughts have a large Theam I am up and down in and out and I see a great thing before me and sometimes it causeth a Word to drop I see ETERNAL LIFE before me That great thing that concerns me Sure it is a great thing to be at the very Brink to see all Promises fulfilled made good and all the Demonstrations of the Gospel made patent To see the Foundation of Eternal Life for ever laid and to come and cast ones eye upon it in the abundance of Faith And these are the things that lie just before me only there hath been an entrance about them I have believed c. and now I go to see the Promise and the Faith of the Promise accomplished To a Friend saying you have a strong hand to carry you Sure there is our Security in his holding of us more than in our holding of him He answered There it only lies The Lord continue to be with you The Lord make good his Covenant to you I and all the rest even that which is written in that good Book of his in which we desire to have our hope Let nothing hinder our Faith nor disorder our Practise He proceeded further to speak that day in the Afternoon thus God makes all these things here with respect to me at this time as it were to change their kind A Draught of Spring-Water fresh Beer or such a like thing how sweet have I sometimes found it But now nothing The rare vertues of Apples and other Fruits they are to me now as Dirt they do not answer my End My natural Thirst and Desire cannot be gratified with any thing here Though my Body lies parching away with Thirst my Soul loatheth dainty Meats and the best of Liquors that have been pleasing they are now a burthen to me I can taste nothing that will give reviving God is drawing forth my Nature in the way of a Dissolution that I must have no more Chear now but what comes in by New Covenant Mercy and that will be to Soul to Body for ever and thanks be to his Name he will not have me feed with dirty Company He hath shewed me the way of Life he hath caused me to chuse him I bless his Name Oh that wonderful thing that thou shouldst cause me to chuse thee Oh that thou mightest be chosen by all those that ever I had Acquaintance with in all my Life Oh that none of them may go without it Oh for a turned heart Oh for the eyes of Light and Life Oh for Salvation out of Damnation to a changed People Blessed be God that ANY that so MANY near to me were turned in at the right Gate of Election upon the Downfall that came by Sin as I hope as I hope O Lord find out thine thou wilt find them out Work Miracles work Miracles by converting Power in turning Souls that the Earth may see thy Glory Oh thou hast been my God many ways hast thou declared it Thou hast been the God of the Family from whence thou chusest me The Family is almost at an end Thou hast not left our poor Family two of us are yet remaining on the Earth O my God let it be for an eternal Renown to thy Name that thou hast hitherto reached out thy Grace to we two poor Remainers of that numerous Family Oh thou hast left us thy self to be our God to be our Portion O Lord thou hast given thy self to us and and thou hast given thy Spirit into us and we to the Glory of thy Grace can say Thou art OUR GOD hast been our God and wilt be our God and wilt number us amongst those whom thou hast delighted to take pleasure in unto Eternity O Lord be thou the God of our Seed or of our Seeds Seed O Lord that thou wouldst take them in with all those thou hast brought into Relation with thy self We have Relations in the World some that lie under the power of Satan and thou makest us to know it that it might be a constant Grief unto our hearts O Lord that none relating to us or to any or either of us might be found in those Bonds O Lord that thou wouldst imprint thine Image that thou wouldst come with a powerful hand and clear them out of Satan's Kingdom into the Kingdom of Christ Lord we are mingled in the World we have many Relations now up and down and what shall we say for the Children of our People
his Entertainment before he parts And more particularly That if a poor Child should come to his Father and say Father I would not offend you it goes to my very heart when-ever I do offend and grieve you Teach me therefore O my Father so as that I may not offend you in what I do Will not hereupon an indulgent Father compassionate such a Child And hath not God much more pity towards his Children who is the Fountain of Love and Tenderness Of the DIS-RELISH of SPIRITUAL THINGS to a GRACELESS HEART That the things of God and of Soul-Concern are but a dry Morsel to a Carnal heart that such an one may talk of Heaven of the Glory and Happiness thereof and may seem to be somewhat taken therewith but if a good Bargain or some Worldly Profit interpose the heart of such an one is presently taken up and tickled with another kind of delight Also Of the vast difference betwixt a true Christian and one that is not so That a Christian indeed is a strange thing one that outwardly appears to live in the World like others yet there is something within him unseen that is as different from what is in others as Heaven and Earth CONCERNING TRUE FAITH That it is the giving up of our Souls to God in an Act of Reliance on him for himself and those things we desire of him according to his Will that Assurance is rather the Flower or Seal of Faith than Faith properly That Christians are often much mistaken about Faith in taking it for a sure Confidence and Belief that God will help and deliver c. But Faith chiefly consists in a Recumbency and Reliance on God a leaning a rolling upon him to help us or for whatsoever Mercy we desire of him and not that he will help or deliver out of such a particular trouble or to bestow on us such or such a thing we want or remove such an Evil we fear that being rather the Product Effect and Privilege of Faith Many complain they have not Faith when they have no Assurance of God's Performance though they are all the while in the Exercise of Believing and that Faith is the Faith that justifies and true Faith is such as realizeth things absent remote and future That it is not the nearness of a thing makes it real but Faith seeth a thing to be real though afar off when we are apt to judge many times of the reality of things because they are near Also true Faith dwells in a pure Conscience it makes its Nest there it purifies the heart His Faith in God's Covenant His Faith in God's Covenant and Promise and Promise instead of many other Instances appeared in these short Sayings That those who cannot live nakedly upon a Promise in the want of a thing will not know how to use it as they should when they have it and if I were sure to live but one Hour this should be my Exercise The Acting of my Faith upon God's Promises and whilst the Soul is thus in an adventurous Frame this is not Presumption neither cannot be It also exerted it self in Prayer in such Expressions as these That the Lord would arm us by his Fear even with that Fear that is the Concomitant of Love and let them both be united in us for it is one Clause of the New Covenant that he will put his Fear into our hearts that we may fear him and his Goodness and that his Name be great in our Eye that may preserve us from departing from him That the Covenant of his Grace might be a Tree of ripe Fruit to us and that the Hand of Grace might shake it that the Fruit may fall down and we may gather it up for our daily Refreshment Nothing doth more satisfie me in the verity of the Religion I His Argument for the Truth of Christian Religion profess than the Oneness of the hearts of the People of God who all give in the self-same Testimony of the Work of Grace in the heart the same Spirit of Faith breathing in them all His Love to God and Christ was seen in the Course of his His Love to God and Christ Obedience to Divine Commands and his great Submission to all afflictive Dispensations from God Also in his great Love to the People of God in his frequent secret and close Communion with God here and a longing desire to be translated by Death into his immediate Presence and Fruition His Assurance of God's Love His Assurance of the Love of God His Practical Discourses Letters the solemn Covenant he entred into with God and his Dying Speeches do throughout plainly demonstrate And it was greatly promoted and maintained by his often renewing and ratifying of his said solemn Covenant some of which Ratifications annexed thereto are here inserted in his own words as followeth Finding some motion within me urging me seriously to view over this my Covenant and considering it was a most deliberate and voluntary Engagement and that God with whom I have to do remembers it and fails not on his part and that the frame of my heart is so sinfully prone to cast off the Cords of my Duty and so depart from the easie Yoke of Christ and the unspeakable Privileges of my Covenant-Interest in God my Saviour and having I fear sinfully omitted these three Years a through Review of this my Free-Will-Offering I have this Afternoon once more spread it and my Soul with it through the favour of my God before his face and do now again in his Fear and in Reliance on him willingly renew the same and again bind my self to be the Lord's and to be wholly subjected to his Will to own him as my God according to the full scope and purpose of the Covenant before expressed And now O God of all Grace and Glory let this Covenant that thou hast caused and drawn me to renew with thee be confirmed in Heaven and in the heart of thy poor Servant and casting my self upon thee I claim thee to be my God and I give my self to thee and this Evening an Evening greatly to be remembred the 28th of January 1663. I subscribe irrevocably hereunto with my Hand Henry Dorney Vnder much Infirmity yet in some Integrity in my scope and design I have perused over the forementioned Covenant and do own the same and do this day in Reliance on the good hand of my God enter anew into the Bonds thereof as the state of my most happy and most desirable Liberty and Privilege in which I humbly claim God in Christ to be mine and willingly render my self into the hands of his Power and Grace in all things to be his and at his dispose for ever To which I subscribe with my hand this 20th of February 1664. Henry Dorney It having pleased God after many other considerable Changes and various Trials and Exercises in my Life now of late to reduce me from a single to a
ever observing that blessed Rule of our Saviour in Matth. 7. 12. And when he had hired or made use of Persons in any Work or Labour he would not only pay them their due which was agreed to and promised but most frequently he would give them somewhat over and above especially if he judged them to be poor and needy That whilst he had bodily His Diligence in his Calling with a holy Frame of Spirit therein Strength and Health to manage Worldly Employments he was always active and industrious therein and he could not be ever charged with any wilful Omission Yet all the while he had his Mind so composed that he was ever in a readiness to a due and regular Attendance on the solemn Duties of his high Calling not suffering any outward Occurrence of what kind soever to distract or unsettle his Mind But when he approached to God in the actual Exercise of any Religious Duties he was still furnished with such variety of Matter and Divine Rhetorick as if all his preceding time had been taken up in and about spiritual Work Such was the habitual Frame of his Soul towards heavenly things And he gave this Advice That we should do Worldly Business with Diligence Patience Moderation and Faith and with such a self-denying respect as if it were the sole Interest and Concern of another rather than our own And when we would make a Judgment of our selves or Actions in matters doubtful we should put our selves in the Room of a third Person in the Case His great Love to the Church His Love to the Church and People of God and People of God rendred him a restless Supplicant and Intercessor in Prayer for them That upon whatsoever Immergency relating to the Church of Christ in general or any Member thereof in particular even for such whom he never knew or saw on the first notice of their Distresses he would be wrestling with God in secret Retirement And if other Christians were at such a time near or occasionally present he would be also urging them to the same Work saying Come let us lift up our joynt Requests to God for them And this at any time of the day and constantly at set times for Prayer he presented their Case and Concern most affectionately before the Lord as a thing which always lay very much on his heart And for the Church of Christ in general his Petitions were observed to be such as these That God would visit Zion the whole Church and visible Body of Christ here in this World That it might be a Glory in all the Earth That as he hath taken hold of the Plough he would carry on his own Work That he would look upon his Son look upon his Covenant look upon that Redemption he hath contrived and designed for the bringing in of Souls unto himself to bestow his own Free Grace upon in making them Vessels of Mercy and Glory That his Church might prosper and every faithful Member of it and become Glorious in Holiness That the Son of Righteousness would break forth and sparkle upon it That his Ordinances might be maintained his Gospel run and be glorified and get Ground every where That God would tender his People as the Apple of his Eye as a Royal Diadem in his hand and as the Object of his Delight That he would give a mighty Check and a dreadful Rebuke unto the fury of all such as bear ill Will to Zion And that all Oppositions and Combustions against his Interest might tend to the Advancement of it of his Glory and the furtherance of the Gospel That Holiness might spread it self throughout the World and the Mouth of Iniquity be stopt in all the Earth That all that Enmity against God and his People which hath been in the World ever since the Infection crept into our Natures from Satan the Prince of Darkness might be destroyed and come to an end That his People might glory in his great Salvation procured and purchased by the Vndertaking of Jesus Christ on their behalf That he would rule in the midst of his Enemies bearing down the Spirit of Wickedness and all the Contrivers of Mischief That he would remember his People under sore Trials and be in the midst of the Storm and say unto them It is I be not afraid and prepare them for every Shock they shall meet withal before the Son of Man appeareth That the Throne of his Grace be lifted up and the Rise of his Glory made conspicuous That the Sceptre of Jesus Christ might sway it self and become Glorious Counter-working all the Wisdom and crafty Counsel of the Serpent's Seed And that he would not suffer his People to be in any Pit out of which his Arm cannot help them That he would keep his Ministers as Stars in his Right Hand that his Enemies which are as the Tail of the Dragon might not scatter them That all his People might be enabled to meditate Terrour and not be afraid when he shall arise to shake terribly the Earth That Salvation might be for Walls round about his People and that God would cause his Glory to shine forth That God would save these Nations with a mighty Salvation and undertake for his own Glory in the midst thereof That for such as are under Bonds of Guilt he would deliver them by his Rescuing Pardoning Grace That he would be mindful of those under inward Trouble by reason of Pollutions within and Wounds of Temptation from without That spiritual Objects might be great in their sight and that he would bring them out with some notable advantage over all the Powers of Darkness that lay Siege against their Faith and Hope His whole Life attested the Tenderness of his Conscience His Tenderness of Conscience and it was particularly remarkable in these two Instances First When he had at any time Moneys lying by him to any value he would lend the same without demanding a Penny Interest And when-ever he received any Interest he would be sure to bestow it wholly in charitable and pious Uses Secondly Whilst he had Trading abroad on all Goods Exported and Imported he was very careful of paying the full Duty or Custom thereon rated and required without Diminution His high Esteem of the Grace His high Esteem of Repentance and Applications to Christ of Repentance with his Applications to Christ shewed it self in his frequent lamenting Confessions of Sin and praying for great measures of Repentance for himself and exhorted others to the same necessary Work And he was a diligent Searcher and curious watchful Observer of his own heart who could not bear with any Guilt but would make fresh Applications to the Blood of Sprinkling saying To be under Guilt was sad but when we are laden in the sence of it if we carry this Guilt to Christ and venture on him for Pardon and Mercy we shall not be cast out And how it was an evil and a bitter thing to
made ours Ah there is very little Christianity in the World I would be for God while I live and for Heaven when I die Mine own strength never did me good Faith abhors all manner of Aid that Flesh and Blood can give It undoes a poor Creature in a saving manner There is a holy venturing on God Little do we think how kindly God takes it when we throw our selves upon him such a venturous Soul is always acceptable to him Oh for some awakening Visit from Heaven that may alarm us out of our selves into the City of Refuge before we are benighted He also prayed That the Lord would come into us with Triumph and trample down whatever is opposite to the Purity of his Nature in our Souls And in regard all our mischief ariseth from the unmortifiedness of our Wills and our Sores and Wounds and the grieving of God's Spirit is caused by a sinful Indulgence towards them and the exercise of our faith love and all other Graces is suspended when we are lead Captive by them that therefore the Lord would save us from a selfish fleshly Will and divorce us wholly from it and then when we come to die the separation of the Soul from the Body will be but a small thing to us His Thankfulness to and Blessing His Thankfulness to God with Praise and Blessing of God was observed to be his continual Exercise He was not known at any time to murmur under the sharpest Trials but would evermorre be justifying God praising and speaking well of his Name and persuading others to do the like And he greatly delighted to praise God in singing of Psalms especially on the Lord's Day and he much bewailed and blamed the great neglect of it in this present Age. He had a great Esteem and Veneration His Reverence towards Superiors for Authority and Government as being a Divine Ordinance and did highly disapprove and condemn those who did manifest the least Contempt thereof And would pray for the Supream Powers according to Scripture-Rule His Thoughts and Meditations His Meditations on Death were much on his last Change And thereupon he would frequently take occasion to speak something concerning Death to awaken both himself and others to a due and serious Preparation for it in such Sayings as these That we are shortly to remove hence take our flight when the Volume of the Book will be closed up and the Ministration of Grace will be at an end There must now be through work in giving away our selves to God else 't will be a dismal day when we come to die Death will make us to have other manner of thoughts of things than we have now Death will represent things in other Colours 't will stretch every Vein assuredly We should live always as those that have hope towards God when they die and that are ready every day to step out of one World into another That such a flying to Christ as is accompanied with a Resignation of our Wills to his Will is the best Preparative for our Change When I am going to leave the Body if I have not an Ark to fly unto I must perish in the Water We are going to live with Spirits where will be no body at all to converse with and what a Life is that Let us then always follow the Leading and Conduct of the Spirit here We should by Sympathy as much as we may die with every one that dies and that would make us serious Christians We must shortly leave this World and because we are not willing to part with it God tears it off that himself may be all in all We are lanching out of the World apace and our last Change is near only I would not have it come as an unexpected Surprize God did not deliver the Martyrs of old but by Death and so he may do by us And what a wretched frame of heart have we that we are so easily satisfied to leave some things relating to our greatest Concern always undone Some little something as we account it still to do But when we come to die and to leave the World how will that swell at such an hour I know no Terror greater than for a Man to go out of the World out of God and out of Christ and yet the most do so And when at that time he was answered by a Person present Your Case is not so he replied It is an amazing Mercy I am wonderfully saved And he further said Time of Health is the Opportunity The great things of the Souls Interest in Sickness or on a dying Bed is a bad time to manage He lived much in an Exercise His Prospect of Glory of Faith upon the Glory of the future State which was a wonderful Support and Comfort to his Spirit and he did continually take in large Views and Prospects of it Whence he was observed to say before his last Sickness That he had such an IDEA of the Glory of Heaven that he thought he could furnish a Book with fit Matter on that Glorious Subject And as he lived in all manner His exemplary Carriage at his death of Conversation holily so he finished his Course and died triumphantly Which fully appears in his last Speeches and Prayers Continuing in a lively and vigorous Exercise of Spiritual and Heavenly Graces especially Faith Hope Patience Self-Resignation full Assurance and Longing to be with the Lord to the last period of his Life when Grace issued in Glory and an abundant Entrance was ministred to him into the everlasting Kingdom of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ A PRACTICAL DISCOURSE OF THE Nature Means and Method OF SALVATION Isaiah 45. 17. But Israel shall be saved in the Lord. THE poor Dove being sent abroad and gliding over the great Flood at last found an Olive Branch and returned to the Ark. In like manner my confused thoughts have soared hither and thither over the face of that great deep which the first Apostacy drowned Mankind in and having turned over the Scriptures hoping thence to receive some news after such a dreadful Shipwrack this Scripture comes flying with an Olive Branch in its mouth Saved in the Lord the first word keeps from fainting till the next word comes in and shews the nature of the deliverance the certainty and the manner of it the first word like Ahimaaz says 2 Sam. 18. 28. All is well but Cushi declares the matter and how 't is accomplished Salvation plainly asserted is gladsome news but lest so weighty a business should be mistaken and that the understanding might the more be convinced the means by which 't is obtained and the hand from whence 't is procured is drawn forth In the Lord as delightful a sentence to a sinner as that which Belshazzar saw was terrible to him that made his Joynts to tremble but this makes the lame to leap as an Hart this makes the Wilderness to blossom as a Rose Saved The
Intermission and stoppage without the constant supply which they receive from the Sun and the Fountain And therefore a Biliever's eye and aim must be tending to an immediate pitching on and closing with himself as the proper course and sure way and only orderly means to find rest and safety to the Soul The next thing to be considered is to enquire how the Eye of Faith The Aim of Faiths Eye desirous to attain its Mark. is to be levelled at and exercised upon this perfect and glorious Object so as to change the Soul from bearing the burthen of its own guilt and to get power against the defiling nature and power of sin and so to carry on the change from Glory to Glory after the Image of Jesus Christ by the vertue of his Spirit 2 Cor. 3. 18. The Dispensation of the Gospel is the Glass the Glory of the Lord there appearing is that which Faith fixeth and feedeth upon it passeth through the Glass and seizeth upon Jesus Christ represented therein and there stays till it hath enamoured the Soul into the same likeness The Glory of Christ begets an Image of Glory in the heart of a Believer of the same nature with its self Indeed there is a transient closing with the Promises as with a Neighbour who can tell where the Souls Friend dwelleth and so do the Ordinances and so far the Spirit of the Father lodgeth in them for the help of the diligent seeker to draw him to Christ The first motion also of that diligent seeking proceedeth from the Father who worketh with the Son by the Spirit to draw the Soul in true method to the Person of the Son as Mediator in whom the Father Son and Spirit gives the Soul a satisfactory Meeting Joh. 5. 17. c. 6. 44 45. and c. 14. 23. But the Knot of Union by which the Soul partakes of the Life and Glory of God is not perfectly knit till the Soul actually enters into the Fellowship of Christ the Mediator 1 Cor. 1. 9. and for this very end serves the preaching of the Gospel in the Dispensation of it Col. 1. 28. The Soul being thus ushered in treats with and fixeth on Christ absolutely and immediately and lays hold on his Personal Worth only as the Foundation of its hope and help The Soul has gained a great deal of Beauty in Christ's Eye when once 't is brought by his Spirit to leave its own Idols and forsake its own Country and to trust singly under the shadow of his Wings there Blessedness begins as Boaz said to Ruth Ruth 2. 12. And here the Soul closeth with the All-sufficiency of the Mediator pondering the large extent thereof And whereas the Soul is usually more troubled with the Aggravations of sin and the Circumstances thereof than about the sin it self and about its insincerity and want of feeling remorse and sufficient detestation against sin in its repentance and much molested with the stain that Guilt leaves on the Conscience and finding that neither remove of Guilt nor power of Cleansing nor freedom from its just Accusation can be got from the Consultations of a â—ounded Spirit it falls nakedly on the All-sufficiency of the Mediator and there it beholds him as one able to take away all sins in their whole extent His Body was given him for that end and although his own Body was pure yet it was in the likeness of the flesh of sin or sinful flesh and depravation of Nature received from Adam that as far as any motions of sin or capacity of sinning is found in Mankind he did bear the likeness of that State And so is called the second Adam not only as one representing the Elect Seed of Grace but also as being the Superadequate Antidote to conquer and remove all Poyson that entred upon Mankind by the sin of the first Adam The Nature of the second Adam is made as perfectly holy as the first was defiled by sin and became perfectly sinful as appears in Rom. 5. And in regard the strength and slaying power of sin lies in the Law his Humane Nature was made under the Law subjected to the whole Law as far as it had to do with sinful Man for this end that he might redeem them who were under the Law from being under any condemning or accusing Sentence or sting of punishment from thence which he bringeth about by obeying it satisfying for the breach thereof made by sinful Man Sin is therefore sin because 't is against the Law he therefore is made under the Law and that to fulfil its Commands and bear its doom Though sin be finite in the Transgressor yet 't is infinite in respect of the Object the infinite God But the Obedience and Suffering of Christ was of an infinite extent in respect of the Person because 't was the Act of God-man and in the Vertue also because 't was a contrived Remedy in the Council of God's Love to outstretch the injury that was done to the infinite Divine Majesty by finite Man Hence it is that this Remedy carries with it the Terms of Abounding Grace Rom. 5. 17 20. and unsearchable Riches Ephes 3. 8. The All-sufficiency lies also in this that 't is a free Gift considering that the Gifts of God's Love are infinite as his Nature is the thoughts of which do by Faith bring in a Foundation for infinite Justification and Righteousness and makes way to the rest of the purchased Possession that lies in the Person of the same Redeemer the infiniteness of his Goodness and Drift in this design which could never suffer disappointment the infiniteness of his Wisdom that could never mistake the infiniteness of his Love that can never cease nor Power fail And since the Nature of the Salvation of God is infinite it is brought down into the Person of God-man and from him into the Ordinances and so by the Spirit into the heart of Man retaining still its infinite Nature In Jesus Christ the infinite God is made Flesh in the Ordinances he speaks by Man's Voice in the faith of the heart he dwelleth carrying the Soul by the Operation of his Spirit to look upon him and hear his Voice in the steps of his Condescention to the true enjoyment of himself 'T is comfortable to have the Testimony Faith taking a right Method of a good Conscience Prov. 15. 15. and power over Corruption and Soul-disquiet thereby but I must not begin there God begins my Righteousness and Freedom in himself and brings it forth in the Person of Jesus Christ I must begin it there also and as it is perfected in him I must perfectly suck it thence continuing perpetually at that Breast Heb. 10. 14. never expecting to have it mended by any thing I could do though it were the obeying of the whole Law Gal. 2. 16. for my Obedience is but the Obedience of a stained Nature that has already broken that righteous Law When Guilt Defilement and Weakness of a foolish
Christ at his death gave it such a Wound that will never be cured till it has by the Faith and Prayer of every Believer bled it self to death When Guilt seems to live most and so sends a Believer afresh to Christ then does Guilt die apace and remains only to keep a Believer's faith in continual exercise and render Christ precious to the Soul as cold Weather makes a Fire the more comfortable and pleasant so that while my Soul holds close to this that Christ is upon his own terms Righteousness Pardon and Life to me by making me his and he being mine my own guilt becomes no longer my own because I am no longer my own but his who bought me with his blood and as guilt is removed so the fear of falling away is removed and relief against daily infirmities provided for If being an Enemy I was reconciled by his Death much more being reconciled shall I be daily saved by his Life Rom. 5. 10. But whence ariseth this that I Faith only a relief against daily infirmity find it harder to relie on him for power against daily infirmities than against the power of condemning Guilt Daily Infirmities are the lesser Enemies but yet they are present Enemies and seeming smaller in stature than the great bulk of universal Humane Guilt the Soul of a Christian is apt to step forth against them in his own strength and resolution and so returns many times with shame whereas the same Covenant which takes away the stony heart and state of Guilt is that only which gives a heart of flesh and cleanseth the Soul from all unrighteousness I cannot therefore mortifie one foolish filthy or distracted thought without the application of the whole power of the same Christ who has removed my great and condemning guilt and cast it into the Sea I am apt foolishly to think that my great guilt being removed I may in some sort take my ease which degenerates more and more into spiritual sloth and unthankfulness but my daily infirmities are like a pricking Bryar which continually afflicts me and lets me know that this is not my Rest neither will my own hands put away these Bryars but only the consuming fire of Christ's Spirit setting his Death and Resurrection in Battel Array against them So that I see if ever I expect a good hour in this World or to all Eternity it must be only and all over in Jesus Christ O cursed Nature O cursed Sloth that is ever dividing that which a blessed Covenant of Grace has joyned together Jesus Christ and my Soul All his drift towards me is that he might be all in all to me Oh that he would vent himself and spare not he that bids me fear not only believe is only able to make me believe I often draw near methinks to some Resignation to him with some universal scope but am quickly gravelled again yet so much delight remains in the very hope of my Soul towards him that makes me chuse rather to have my eyes towards him though with a long look than to say within my heart My Beloved will never come surely he will yet come and his Reward is with him This Resignation to God is so glorious in the Nature Ground Properties Resignation and encouraging Privileges of it that the very glimpse thereof makes my heart light and even faint for desire to be wholly swallowed up and translated in Spirit Soul and Body into the pure Rest and Crystal Life of God but the nature of it I can no more express than a Man's Pensil can draw the Portraicture of a Man's Life or represent the nature of a Taste albeit it may draw the Figure of a Humane Body or represent the visible Food in which lies that hidden quality of Life and Taste But if words may be used about it I would thus express it 'T is an allaying delightful willing The nature of Resignation open-hearted dissolving of all my desires cares and enjoyments of things present and to come relating to Soul and Body into the heart and unlimited disposure of God in Jesus Christ my Lord with an endless victorious Security of Confidence Consolation and Peace of heart and Conscience The ground of which glorious active and Soul-quickning Rest is The Ground of it Jesus Christ the Mediator who has received his Redeemed to the Glory of God Rom. 15. 7. He is called their Peace Mich. 5. 5. their Rest Isa 28. 12. their Sufficiency 2 Cor. 3. 5. Comfort 2 Cor. 1. 3. Joy Psal 43. 4. and All in all Col. 3. 11. In all these respects Jesus Christ becomes the ground and attractive cause of Resignation as he is God and Man bringing the Soul through Union with his Humanity to God with whom he is personally united 1 Pet. 3. 18. into which Union every Believer is received through the Mystery of his free Grace Joh. 17. 21. and the Application of this Union to the Soul by Faith breeds this blessed Resignation for Christ being thus qualified in his own Person and thus uniting the Soul to himself by his Spirit begets in the heart through believing an answerable Counterpane of Conformity and Quiet in the Inward Man which cannot be capable of loss because the unchangeable God is the Author and unalterable Cause thereof nor be obstructed while Faith holds up its exercise therein but runs out into an infiniteness of Satisfaction in all cases because it is got with the help and expiating boundless Interest of him who is infinite It enters in by the Door of his Manhood to the partaking of whatever he is Heir to and is made Heir with him of his Conquest Fulness Security Peace and Joy so that albeit the Flesh may fail God being the portion of a Believer faileth not but always unchangeably continueth in the Mystery of this Union to be the Foundation and effecting Cause of a Believer's Resignation to him as into the hands of a faithful Creator 1 Pet. 4. 19. Jesus Christ himself is the glorious Model of Resignation for God in Christ resigned up himself to the Nature of Man Heb. 2. 14. and being the Eternal Son resigned up himself to the Will of his Father to be made a Servant and he who is the Law-giver resigns himself subject to the Law God over all blessed for ever resigns himself to the Curse of the Law he resigns up the freedom of his own Will to a voluntary Covenant he undertakes as it were the encumbrance of a Family and accounts the cries of many Infants about him no disturbance but a delight he resigned up his Body to death and became of no Reputation that out of his Dust he might bring many Sons to Glory he resigned up his heart to bear their sins and sorrows he hath resigned up whatever he is to be theirs that they might be his and be saved both living and dying from all wants and fears through his Resignation of himself to stand or fall with
therefore I go to everlasting Strength The more I make infinite Power my Lord and Master the more is that Divine Power engaged to hold me up Rom. 14. 4. Let my own Power languish into nothing so long as I can claim on the account of Free Grace undoubted Right to the Arm of God my own strength never did me good but deceived me Dost thou not know O mis-giving heart that I am shortly to leave the whole weight of my Soul in lanching from Mortality upon the same word of Promise which doth now offer strength to wade through difficulties of my present Warfare And what do I more than step forth to behold the Lord sealing his Covenant and Promise that he will be my God and will guide me by his Grace and afterwards bring me to Glory To which Covenant in faith though with fear and trembling I desire to give my consent which I trust in some measure of sincerity I have done Neither do thou O Satan vaunt and say to me as Eliab said to David 1 Sam. 17. 28. I know the pride of thy heart I shall yet bring thee down Know O thou false Accuser I go to him who is both able to hold me up and make me humble too that I may be more and more abased and die away from the workings and lustings of Flesh and Blood into the Power Grace Wisdom and Truth of God to whose Covenant for that end by his own Appointment I declare my consent and do desire with a broken and bleeding heart to bless him that ever he allowed me to come so near him in this manner Though I fall I shall not fall utterly I shall be raised up again because my Redeemer is risen and he is strong who pleads my Cause What is the Volumne of the Scriptures but a divine Oeconomy containing the Laws of Relation betwixt a God of all Grace and his chosen Institutions and Commands of Grace Threatnings and Reproofs of Grace Promises and Betrothings of Grace and meer Grace Has not the same God who said I will betroth thee to me for ever in Righteousness and Judgment in Loving-kindness and tender Mercies and in Faithfulness Hos 2. 19 20. said also to me Thou shalt know the Lord Has he not said to me Thy Maker Father Son and Spirit is thy Husband Isa 54. 5. even while I am grieved in Spirit and tossed about with the Tempest of my own Confusions And has he not said that I shall say The Lord is my God Hos 2. 19 20. And he will say I am one of his people and will not be ashamed to be called my God Heb. 11. 16. Yea hath he not said that I shall say I am the Lords and that I shall bear his Name and Sir-name with his Jacob and his Israel and that I shall even subscribe it with my hand never to be reversed Isa 44. 5. O Fountain of Life and living Waters reveal thy self that I may not go about to marry Flesh and Spirit together but that I may be spirited as a chaste Virgin espoused to Christ and so enter into this glorious spiritual Flesh-mortifying and mystical Wedlock Let it not be meerly speculative but real and influenced with light life and power from thy heart to mine Oh how doth this unwilling heart of mine pull back What canst thou close with besides God in Christ but it will perish and while it is in thy hand will be a broken Reed that will make thee fall in leaning upon it Is not the Covenant of Grace somewhat which God himself hath devised for his own Glory and thy Establishment Has he required thee to bind thy self to fear and love him and hath not he engaged to circumcise thy heart that thou maist love and fear him Deut. 30. 6. Jer. 32. 38 39 40 41. Oh that I could put faith to this Word till the warmth thereof grew up into a Flame which many Waters might never quench and Oh let my faithful God who has expresly promised by Covenant to give me one heart and one way with the rest of them who are Confederates of Grace that I may fear him for ever for my Good remember it and fulfil it as he hath said with all his heart and all his soul Oh pardon my unbelief that I do stand so far aloof from putting to my Seal that God who cannot lie will accomplish his word to a tittle MY Soul longs to be at some The Soul longs for clear work more distinct and express Closure with such a God and would fain reckon before-hand what it will cost me When I consider that word 1 Cor. 6. 19 20. Know you not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you and that you are not your own for you are bought with a price And therefore glorifie God in your body and in your spirit which is God's I even faint under the Majesty of such a Covenant of unutterable Grace which calls me up to such dignity and duty at once Body and Spirit which are God's what a word is this You are not your own how far doth this reach The whole Concernments of my Soul and Body which are my own are to be given up to God by Faith and new Obedience that they may be his and at my own dispose no longer Oh a thousand Worlds for a Surrender suitable to this Estate and Calling of God in Christ Jesus Oh let the Creator of Israel my King fashion the value of this Pearl in every Affection of my Soul that I may in his own meaning sell all to purchase it Christ Jesus was in earnest when he gave his Body to the Cross and his very Soul an Offering for my sake O that I could be in a like seriousness in giving away my Body and Soul to him again Strengthen O Lord my weak hands and confirm my feeble knees Methinks I hear the voice of my The Soul is invited by Christ beloved Jesus calling out Fear not O anxious Soul behold it is I be not asraid I who am thy Redeemer am strong I am mighty to save and therefore Hearken O Daughter and consider incline thine ear forget also thy father's house and thine own people Let me be the Object of all thy Affections rest in my pleasure only and always so will I thy King and Husband greatly desire thy Beauty and be always trimming thee for my own Society for I am thy Lord and thou must worship and fully rest in and be devoted to me alone and to no other I consent dear Christ and here And doth consent and engage I offer my Body and Soul to the Agreement I give it up dear and precious Redeemer I give it up unto thee for ever in obedience to thy Commands and relying upon thy Strength I write it with my own hand that I will be thine and for thee and not for any other My Beloved is mine and I am his Though I am
shall the Shadows fly away Be very serious in exercising faith to represent the truth and reality of this Union-state that there is such a thing and in that Exercise dilate your thoughts in an awful serious comfortable Reverence and reverent love of God manifested in the Flesh to be Emanuel God with us Pursue this Meditation till you even make this Union as visible as may be to the eye of your faith Consider the Nature of it is unchangeable 2. The Nature of this Vnion it was made in God's Decree before all time and constituted for Eternity The Bond is God's Faithfulness and his Love which many Waters cannot quench an indissolvable Marriage an Ingrasture into the Fulness Fountain and Perfection of Life 'T is the Purchase Possession and unwithering Inheritance of him who is Yesterday to day and for ever 'T is Union reciprocal Christ is thine and thou art his My Beloved is mine and I am his What shall I give thee saith Christ Not only a Kingdom but my self What shall I render saith the Soul Not only my Praises but my whole self Possess me rule me fill me take my heart and give me thine let thy love be shed into my heart with a ravishing Inundation and let my love be passionate pure and find no Object elsewhere but thee 'T is an Union that has distinguishing Excellency in it a Remnant chosen out of many between which Remnant and the rest nothing made the difference but the free Choice of God An Union created of Contraries made up of unreconciled Parties who were at-the extreamest Enmity and now become of the most absolute and passionate Amity so it is in Christ and so it is in the Seed of it in all the Persons united to him An Union in which the Party wronged voluntarily began to love first 1 Joh. 4. 19. and wooed the offending Party to a Reconcilement An Union in all respects wonderfully made it issued from that peremptory yet deliberate Sentence I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy And what thoughts are sufficient for these things The Privileges of this Union are 3. The Privileges of this Vnion all on the Sinner's side Christ is exalted to give and Sinners called up to receive And what must Sinners receive who are received into this Union Come in O my Soul for thy share for the Treasury is unspeakably rich Through this Emanuel-knot of Union God is not ashamed to be called the God of poor Sinners only as he changeth their state he changeth their names they are now in proper true Appellation Saints though sin remains in them they are beloved who were not beloved they are Sons and Daughters of God every one is a Prince by a second Birth they are took out of Prison and do sit at the King's Table their filthy Garments removed away and are cloathed with white Rayment they are delivered from the Pit and return thither no more they have a goodly Heritage God himself is their Portion all the Power Truth Wisdom Goodness and Mercy that ever God made known to and for his People in all Ages is their Inheritance all the Promises and Providences which God made and wrought at any time are for their use experience teaching and comfort all the Directions Examples and Precepts in the Scripture and all the Reproofs and Threatnings there are for their Learning Consolation nud Discipline to purge strengthen and guard them till the Old Man be quite destroyed till they arrive beyond Sin Change and Hazard their Society is with the Spirit of the Father and the Son with the Image of Christ in his People the Mind of Christ in his Word the Breath Presence and Blessing of Christ in his Ordinances their Sufferings Difficulties and Fears have lost their destroying deadly Sting their Life is Christ in them the Hope of Glory their End is Peace their Death is their Gain however it is for a season with their outward or inward Man they are never otherwise than the Blessed of the Lord and Objects of his Delight Care Good Will and Protection Jer. 32. 38 41. Isa 27. 3. and after this Life that unutterable Blessedness which they are to enjoy when they shall be ever with the Lord Eye hath not seen nor ear heard nor can any heart to the full understand much less can my Meditation reach it or Pen declare it only I may say it is an exceeding EXCELLENT ETERNAL WEIGHT OF GLORY Consider these Privileges O my Soul make the most of them This prize is in thy hand be not as a Fool that has no heart muse the matter peruse the Scriptures and muse it again and again these are not vain glosses the thing is real glorious and great have often and large thoughts of this Union with Christ let the Application of it dwell upon thee day and night And that thou maist come up to 4. Improve this Vnion by Exercise a clearer Vision of this Fountain of Life and drink aboundantly of the Water thereof visit it often pry modestly reverently and seriously into it not for Curiosity but for Transformation 't is thy Portion and now more abstractly than ever all thy Portion a Portion that hath seven Portions in it all Portion in it Mat. 19. 29. He that by faith overcometh and wins this Prise shall inherit all things Rev. 21. 7. for I saith the faithful Witness will be his God and he shall be my Son Here is the Union and the Privilege also Familiarize this Mystery of Union with Christ by remembring and having recourse to it in the use of all Ordinances of Worship in all Christian Duties in all use of Gifts in all conditions of Life and all Seasons day and night in the exercise of every Grace Send up many Ejaculatory Visits Be upon thy Watch continually Let this word always ring in your ear without me ABSTRACTED from me you can do nothing Joh 15. 5. Beware of cooling beware of dismay Remember this Union is grounded on God's eternal unchangeable Love his faithfulness upholds it 't is as the Sun in the Firmament thou hast but a little time to take hold of it the ruin of this Union is the only thing which thy Enemies World Flesh and Devil aim at And now O my precious Soul rowze up thy self to Exercise Thy labour shall not be in vain in the Lord. Use every Ordinance to further this Union In Ordinances In hearing the Word digest all the 1. Hearing Matter into these two Heads as the main ultimate scope of whatever thou hearest either removing Obstructions which keep God and thee a sunder or a Supply of some uniting Power to bring God and thee together Come to the Word with expectation to meet the Lord himself there deliver thy SELF to the Word in the hand of God hear his Voice through Man's Words account the Physitian of Souls wiser than thy self lie before him as a meer Patient refuse no Potion which the Word of
through its Union with the Soul the whole Person is called a Believer who lives by faith both in regard of its inward invisible Operation and also in moulding anew the outward and visible Conversation So that a Believer both lives by faith Heb. 10. 38. and walks by faith 2 Cor. 5. 7. not only in himself but manifestly to others by Words Rom. 1. 12. and Examples Heb. 13. 7. It s chief Seat is the Understanding and the Will Whatever it discovers And prosperous it calls in the Will to assent to working up the whole Soul to a Propensity of Resignation to the Power and Soveraignty of every divine Truth and in particular to the Enjoyment and Privilege Government and Laws of this Union-state And so it sets it self as a mighty Champion in the hand of the Lord to exercise its skill and power in the Soul And now Oh that it might be up and be doing in my Soul and so go on and prosper And Oh! that its Bow may abide in strength and the arms of its hands made strong through the hands of the mighty God of Jacob and under the influence of Divine Grace be blessed and made to go on increase be enlarged and conquer Rise up O Shield and Buckler O Arm of the Lord I have waited and do wait for thy Salvation O Lord Leave me not A DISCOURSE of GLORIFYING GOD. 1 Cor. 6. 19 20. What know ye not that your Body is the Temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you which ye have of God and ye are not your own For ye are bought with a price therefore glorifie God in your Body and in your Spirit which are God's THere are four principal things which this part of Scripture do offer to serious Meditation and Improvement viz. 1. That a true Christian is not his own 2. That he is the Lords 3. That he ought to know his renewed State 4. That his renewed Constitution does oblige him to promote the Glory of God and live up thereto in Soul and Body Not your own c. implies three things viz. 1. That naturally a Man is his own Tyrant 2. That true Christianity is more than speculative 't is a real Change of the Man You are not your own 3. That it doth mysteriously divide a Man from himself This real Alteration and mysterious Contrariety is not a natural Change but spiritual viz. the Body the Soul the Faculties of the Soul and the rational Exercise of those Faculties are still the same and yet a spiritual Change doth affect them all and passeth upon the whole Man This spiritual Change begins in the most hidden part of Man viz. the Mind and therefore Repentance is called the Change of the Mind which Change of the Mind doth influence the whole Man The Mind is said to be changed when the Spirit of God enters in and exerciseth its Soveraign Dominion of Holiness against the Usurpation of the Devil and Natural Corruption which reigned there before whereby the Mind is controlled into a willing Propensity of Subjection to the Authority of the Spirit of God against the Invasion of Sin which still retains some Haunt there as a lurking subdued Enemy called the Flesh lusting against the Spirit till it be destroyed utterly at the day of full Redemption This Dominion of the Spirit steers the natural Faculties of the Soul in their rational Exercise to new Employment and arrays them thereunto with new Habits The Understanding has a sublimer Light the Judgment a better Rule the Will and Affections a better Object better Motives and a better End viz. Spiritual So that such a person is now said not to be his own he is not under that universal Darkness Pollution and Bondage to Sin which he was conceived and born in at first that was his own natural state but he is now rescued from it and is no longer his own 1. While he was his own he taught himself by the Light of fleshly Wisdom and accounted the Gospel Foolishness 1 Cor. 1. 23. but now loaths it and being at a loss cries Lord what wouldst thou have me to do Act. 9. 6. and as they did who burnt the Books in which they learnt curious Arts before Act. 19. 19. in which lay no savour of Christ and spiritual Knowledge 2. While he was his own he ruled himself by the sight of his eyes and imagination of his heart Jer. 7. 27. by the custom and course of the World but now consults not with Flesh and Blood Gal. 1. 16. he sees his own Byass is false and his own Weights too light 3. Motives of Pleasure Profit Honour do not now draw him he was lead by his own Concupiscence but now he is dead to these and saith I have no pleasure in them 4. He designs not his own things neither Health Phil. 2. 30. nor Liberty Act. 20. 23. nor Ease 1 Cor. 11. 10. nor Safety 1 Cor. 15. 13. nor Wealth Heb. 11. 26. nor Honour nor Pleasure as Moses who refused to be Father of a great Nation Exod. 32. 10. and Esther not satisfied with having the honour and delights of being Queen when God's Honour lay at stake Yea he designs not an unworthy preservation of his own life Act. 20. 24. 5. The Spirit of carnal Comforts is gone in such an ones esteem as Esther could not endure the thoughts of her Peoples Ruin though she was at the Royal Feast and to such an one the tickling comfort of such things affect not but are as the White of an Egg yea the unnecessary Conference of such things is tastless as Meat to a sick Man and all because such an one is not his own any longer When a Man is not his own he stands invested with many privileges he has hereby a shelter 1. Against outward Afflictions they sting not their profit reacheth farther than their pain when a Man as in an extasie is not his own therefore Paul rejoyced in them 2. Persecution on the Outward Man reach not him who is not his own who is not at his own home as it was with David when Saul's Messengers came to kill him they found him not but an Image 1 Sam. 19. 16. 3. He can answer the Accusations of Guilt I am not my own and therefore my own Guilt must not stick on me 4. When Flesh and Blood demands Service he can reply I who am not my own am not Debtor to the Flesh When Sin doth vex and molest by its pollutions in the Flesh he can say What make I here I am not my own Let me go hence 5. When spiritual Pride solicits he can reply What I have is not my own 6. And against carnal Security he can say I cannot maintain my own Grace nor restore my self when fallen and therefore am to work out my Salvation with fear I am not my own 7. Against Solicitude about future Events and carking Despondency I am not at my own dispose and therefore such Anxieties are to be
the Prince of this World who works in the Children of Disobedience and thereby freedom to serve God in Holiness and Righteousness This is set forth in Ephes 2. the state of Sin and Death in vers 1 2 3 12. Redemption vers 4 5 6. and of Holiness vers 21 22. And all briefly put together in Ephes 5. 8. Sometimes ye were darkness but now ye are light in the Lord walk as children of light From the Consideration of each of these there followeth divers Questions for the trying of the state of the Soul and knowing in what plight it now stands Indeed the Glory of primitive Innocency is out-shined by the super-abundant Grace and Image of Christ 1 Cor. 15. 47 48 49 as the Glory of the second Temple exceeded the Glory of the first Hag. 2. 9. yet the losing of that is much to be bewailed because we did so sinfully lose it Now then O my Soul canst thou take up Ezekiel's Lamentation over Tyrus Ezek. 27. 12. c. Thou hast been in Eden the Garden of God wast perfect in thy ways c. but thine heart was lifted up and as David mourned for Saul and Jonathan's death though access was thereby made for his own Advancement 2 Sam. 1. 19. c. The beauty of Israel is fallen c. and say How are the mighty fallen the Shield of the Mighty vilely cast away c. How is the Gold of primitive Innocency become dim And how is Mankind that was purer than the Snow now become black as a Coal as Jeremiah lamented over Jerusalem Lam. 4. 1 7 8. c. I. Canst thou say Alas I am become vile Job 40. 4. In me that is in my flesh dwelleth no good thing no Truth Wisdom Righteousness and thy Nature is only evil and that continually Gen. 6. 5. II. Dost thou consider the nature of thy sinfulness and how it doth pollute weaken deceive and enslave thee viz. Dost thou know that thou carriest up and down in thy Nature all the Seeds of all Sins that all the Idolatry Superstitions Blasphemy all the Murthers Uncleanness Violence Injuriousness Hatred Envy Cruelty Falshood c. that ever you read of in the Scriptures or other Histories or that ever your ears heard or eyes saw that the Seed and Spice of it all is in your own heart that all those black Lists Rom. 1. 29 to the end Rom. 3. 11 c. 1 Cor. 6. 9. Gal. 5. 19 20 c. Ephes 2. 12. and 4. 18 19. 2 Tim. 3. 2. and such like Your Nature is in some degree or other tainted with it And because this may seem harsh and strange 1. Consider As far as any Man has the Nature of Adam he has the Corruption of that Nature and as far as all are equal in their Descent from Adam so far are all equal in the Corruption of that Descent all guilty every mouth must be stopped Death came upon all Rom. 3. 19. and 5. 12 18. 2. Consider That though Restraining Grace or Mortifying Grace may curb weaken and subdue sinful Corruption yet it retains its dwelling in the Flesh Rom. 7. 25. And though the Righteousness of Christ be imputed to the Person yet the corrupt Nature of that Person has still a Subsistence till Corruption put on Incorruption till which time corrupt Nature loseth not its Sinfulness but its Dominion Rom. 7. 24. O wretched man that I am said Paul On this account the state of the Person may be changed but corrupt Nature still remains 3. Consider The natural Seed of every sin is a departure from God and a violation of his Authority and therefore he that is guilty of one Sin violates the Authority of God and has a seminal Guilt of all Sin Jam. 2. 10 11. As he who has one true Grace has the Seed of all because it shews he is united to Christ and one with him in Spirit who is the Fountain of all Grace So that where-ever we see Sin we see the Corruption and Pollution of our Nature that dwelleth in us Natural Conscience Education Constitution Profession of Religion Moral Considerations of Fear Shame or the like may curb the working of Corruption in some measure but cannot extinguish the Pollution of Sin from the heart But more particularly in reference to God Is there not great Ignorance and Contempt of him Are not Sins of thoughts more slighted than Sins visible And is there not more Shame for a small Miscarriage in the sight of Man than great Miscarriages in the sight of God What customary Ignorance of all his Attributes How little is he the Object of the Heart's Love Desire Esteem and Meditation Is not the Heart more intent on other things How little is he the Motive and End of what we do Is serving and pleasing him the Hearts design in all things In Worship is not the Heart formal cold and wandring Are not Convictions stifled and the Impressions of the Word of God quickly gone Is there serious Preparation for the Ordinances and due Meditation afterwards Is the Heart glad when the Word reproves as well as when it hears words of comfort As for Men Is not the Course of the World the Opinion of others and their Esteem of great value Are their sins my burthen Is there not Envy Hatred want of Sympathy evil Surmises c. As for my own Soul Is not my heart rash vain inconsiderate my Understanding dark my Affections loose and scattered and Memory slippery and all out of order Do you not discern the weakning Nature of Sin that it sucks the strength of the Soul the deceitfulness of it the deadning blinding and destructive nature of it and the perfection of divine Wrath that attends it And now doth all this make thee O my Soul cry out O wretched man that I am and doth it make thee a burthen to thy self Job 7. 20. as Job cried out Dost thou see a bottomless Deceipt and Desolation in thy Nature as it is in its self corrupted and by Circumstances aggravated And being totally Refugeless Dost thou lay the Hope of thy Help upon a mighty Redeemer If so thou hast attained one Round at least of that blessed Ladder which leads thee up to the Fruition of that renewed State in which thou art God's and he is thine Job 33. 23 to 31. 1 King 8. 38. III. In laying hold on Christ for Redemption 1. Do I see I cannot help my self nor any other Creature help me Isa 59. 16. Psal 49. 7. that none can redeem his Brother nor give to God a Ransom for him 2. That Salvation is only of God Hos 14. 3. his Arm c. 3. That in free Mercy he sent Christ to save Joh. 3. 16. 4. That Christ undertook this Salvation Heb. 10. 7. and performed it Heb. 9. 12. 5. That I am partaker of it by meer faith Ephes 2. 8. 6. Do I lay my whole weight upon this Saviour Isa 64. 8. 7. Doth my heart account him willing Isa 63. 9.
of this Opportunity provoketh me to write to you by this Bearer who has promised to see my Child I desire that as she grows in capacity you would be dropping in somewhat of spiritual things for her tender thoughts to feed upon Though I cannot at this distance see your face yet I know your Temptations in some part and your Deliverance which will in due time appear 'T is good to be carried about and disposed by the hand of the Lord 't is a blessed thing and will one day appear so to rejoyce in the pleasure of the Lord let him do with a poor Creature what he will so he make it more like himself by unselfing you from carnal desires and carnal discontents and fears and transplanting you into the power and joy of believing accounting really the offer of eternal kindness in Christ more Glory than any earthly dying comfort and certainly where the Comforts here can comfort but little the Crosses here can cross but little and shortly farewel both Let your heart plod much on the free Covenant of Grace in Christ by Prayer and Meditation and let your sins come into the same Room with you while you are on that Enquiry When I am at a dead lift then sometimes the Spirit of God takes me up as it were into the Arms of that Covenant which he made with Christ concerning me and whosoever is not a wilful Unbeliever And the very glance of that Salvation wrought by the Lord concerning which I am only to believe sets me again upon my feet I have no other task but to be willing in truth to receive it and I shall have it and if so then you and I shall be sure never to want any one good thing Evil as Evil from the Lord cannot befall us You will then see the favour of God to you in earthly seeming Frowns No such favour as to be dead to sensible Comforts and as a Stranger to earthly carnal Contents though this be tedious to Flesh and Blood yet let it more appear that our Rest is not in these things but in the ever-living God he is your Teacher and I leave you to him 1653. To J. H. N o 15. I Have received your Letter and return you thanks for your love Should I give you a Draft of my Soul it would pity you to see it did not the Mercy of God prevent you would find me in the four last Vices mentioned in Rom. 1. but blessed be the Lord that though there be a Law in my Members warring and tormenting I have in the Lord a little strength and do sometimes view deliverance I have too long had too much content in a Carnal Walking with God and have been satisfied too much in a Carnal Appearance that way There is a way to live with God in the World but it is of his own making no visible or sensible thing can contribute any thing to it and yet I cannot die to these vain helps I shall never understand the word All noted in Matth. 22. 37. till the power of the Most High doth bear it in Ah when will it once be Certainly that Grace will one day be very glorious that hath attended a poor distressed heart through the uncomfortable sights and abundant frailties of this corrupt mortal condition One pure serious true long breathed desire of Christ's appearing gives some deliverance Oh the Glory of that day when the real appearing shall be and all filthy Garments removed and every filthy smell be for ever removed also Let us be found among those that wait for Redemption and wait waking Truly Brother we cannot word out one to another what is the State Duties and Privileges of an Interest in a new Life and hope of Glory The best means the best words yea the Scriptures though not so in themselves are even deceiving to a deceived carnal heart Such a heart will turn the most spiritual things into Flesh and so feed upon them to satisfie carnal Fancy Oh that you and I could start up from fleshly Consultation and listen quietly leisurely and yet greedily and obediently to the meer dictate of the blessed Spirit in his Word Your opportunity and mine of honouring God in the World is very far spent already I desire that you be not only for God in season but out of season also Dear Brother I thought fit to give you a touch of what my poor heart desires to be wrestling in I know you mind the same thing go on therein and prosper there is no other way of Peace but this I am rude but I had rather write my heart than my invention Well Brother I thank you for your good wishes to my poor Child I trust the Lord will vouchsafe her truth of Grace and shed abroad his Mercy and Love into her heart and make it appear as her tender years will bear and manifest the same Remember me to my Sister your Wife whom I have reason also to honour for the goodness of God to her and to you I trust in her I should rejoyce to hear that some others of yours and my poor Friends had the Lord alone for their whole desire and portion I would rather remember such in my Prayers than in my Letter Remember my love to your Sister D. who is I am much assured more precious in God's eye than in her own I leave all News to the Bearer and commend the Remembrance of you to the Lord and remain c. 1654. To S. D. H. N o 16. YOu see this state here is wavering unsetled moving to and fro 'T is a wondrous thing to see how the Lord is pleased to raise up one Wave of disquiet after another to molest the publick Peace and exercise the pains and patience of his people It is no Misery but a Privilege to one that is chosen hence to be emptied from Vessel to Vessel and indeed I scarce know a greater sign of Christ's Conjugal Love than by his Providence to render all other things and Conditions here to be unlovely and undesirable for then the Affections have no where else to centre but in Christ and that makes them go out strong that way Albeit my condition speaks much visible Uncertainty as to this outward Man yet I find a mighty War within me against a free and clear Closing with the certain Riches of Glory which is in Christ in which notwithstanding I trust I have an Interest and have recieved some witness thereof There is a secret joy in the inward part of my Soul and Refreshment at the Remembrance of the Promises of the God of Truth my Rock Sometimes Hope and Desire brings me near to Christ and he to me 'T is an admirable thing to think how a Soul can at the same time be covered over with its Guilt and yet be freed and triumph over the same as removed in Christ truly perfectly and for ever yet this is the Golpel-Doctrine and Experience A Body diseased through Sin yet
a Mind towards the Brazen Serpent a flying to the Horns of the Altar and that does the work Oh the Justification through the means of believing and only plain-hearted believing is a strange thing yet not at all difficult where the Anoynting teaches and the Soul be made free by the Spirit from Carnal Quiddities and Complements as the poor believing Woman was who prest to touch the Hem of Christ's Garment without IFS and AND 's The Lord direct all your Paths and make you fruitful in Holiness through believing and fear no evil Fare you well in the Lord for ever 1654. To S. D. H. N o 17. MY Remembrance of you in my heart does not neither ought to bear proportion to my writing I have reason to esteem you an Heir of Blessing and I would gladly when I hear you own believingly and thrivingly the God of your Mercies and rejoyce in your joy as a Member of the same Body of Christ with you Be eyeing what the Redeemer has done what the vertue of his Sacrifice is not what difficult design he attempted unless it be to honour him the more who has overcome all that we can suppose to have most difficulty in it I think it is a matchless Mercy to let our sins of all sorts and aggravations be cast on his Cross with a humble Resignment to him waiting for Salvation and Strength as a penitent Sinner's Portion through Faith The Lord be with you in whom I rest c. 1654. To J. F. N o 18. MY dear Friend I understand by what I hear that you are like to stay some time in England whilst I am detained here and in regard I know your main desire is to serve Jesus Christ in the simplicity of the Gospel I desire the place of your abode and the people you labour amongst may be adapted to such a savoury design I do somewhat doubt that if you are persuaded to some populous City you will be troubled with itching Ears and find some Temptations more vigorous than in a more private Auditory Yet I will not disswade you from what the Call of God doth most apparently incline you to but do desire you may so lanch forth that the Room of those famous Worthies who are swept away may be supplied and the Word of Reconciliation held forth till the Mystery of God be finished And therefore act with all your might whilst the day lasts and remember the distracted Condition of your warfaring Friends Beware of discouragements your work is excellent your labour short your infirmities undertaken by Christ and your Temptations and the Tempter also judged Yours is a Warfare as well as mine blessed be the Captain of our Salvation through whose Blood alone is hope of Conquest And thus commending you to the Lord c. 1655. To S. D. H. N o 19. I Trust you find the Word of God faithful and creating faithfulness also in the Seed thereof in your heart I think this is a true Maxim One deliberate unfeigned desire of perfect Righteousness in Christ is the very fruit of the perfect Righteousness of Christ For who can bring a clean thing out of an unclean but he alone by his creating Power and Love Nourish Faith tenderly and humbly try the Lord's Will and your own heart prize that Faith which puts forward all Grace which takes away discouragement from Mortification and makes it as the Gate of Heaven and Hope of Glory for the Apostle found it so and pleads it just so to us Rom. 6. 5 6 7 8 c. You have a good Guide give him the honour solely to order your heart and way his voice is heard in the Scripture Believe not your own heart or reason against the naked word of Truth In Cases of Scruple or discouragement of any sort give your self the same Counsel as by the Scriptures you would give to another person in the same Case The work of Faith is not to make sin no sin but because of sin to bring the Soul to the Redeemer that the more sin it sees it may the more abhor it and triumph the more in that Grace doth super-abound through a Mediator And here lies the Mystery of Faith the Lord himself has it and you and I shall say we have enough 1655. To D. H. N o 20. SInce God made your heart pant after that World in which dwells Immortality and Righteousness did you ever upon good Grounds judge any earthly Friend a certain Comfort If so then has God by removing your Sister and now by removing your Father witnessed the contrary If you apprehended them as uncertain then why are they not sufficiently repayed in the fatherly respect of an unchangeable God Is it good to be angry with the Lord Do not study to be more sour and melancholy but how to be more holy self-denying and chearful on the account of a freely tendered Covenant rejoycing that shortly you shall take your Journey and go visit your Father your Sister c. and all the Saints since the beginning Never study how to dishonour the nature of the Gospel by a sullen carnal pleading of Self-unworthiness The truth is Self is not worthy to plead but Christ is worthy to be loved and believed and that 's enough If he will love me heal me purge me save me convince me accept me freely why should I be offended at it and say he cannot mean as the Gospel speaks My sullen heart is never broke till Almighty Convincement from God break my heart to powder till that time I play with Melancholy under a kind of vexing delight I trust God will teach you some good Lesson by this Visitation that the knowledge of God in Christ and the knowledge of your heart may be wisely taken in I earnestly desire this that all your thoughts be brought over to a subjection to the good pleasure of God with delight viz. in that good pleasure of his and be thankful for that yet you have an opportunity to honour him by saying and thinking all his ways are Mercy and Truth Though he take to himself your nearest Friends you do them so much right as to rejoyce that they reign though you mourn after your Beloved and long to leave your self that you may love him the better I leave you to him who can and will do more in his love and pity than I or any Friend can do Rejoyce in hope lift up your head the days of your Lamentation is almost ended I remain yours in the fellow-feeling of the same burthen c. 1655. To A. C. N o 21. I Enjoy my health through the goodness of God as yet My Soul has many dry and sapless Seasons many drowsie and fainty Qualms through the deceipt of heart that lies rooted within but yet the Lord cries ever and anon in my ear I am God and I change not therefore thou art not consumed I find it desperately dangerous to set my Reason and Sense in dispute with that which
lower Ebbings and Flowings The Lord be with you c. 1659. To B. D. N o 37. IT were a miserable thing for a gracious heart to suffer Crosses if the Curse were in them but seeing their Nature is changed our misery doth not lie in such Dispensations but our Instructions are therein though it is hard to say and believe it and when the Clouds seem to gather thick over ones head then to claim sheltering teaching and purging Power under the Wings of God and to sing as Luther was wont Psal 46. God is a Refuge for us Selah that is a posture some way becoming an Heir of Life and Glory whose Estate is truly secured beyond Thief or Moth. I am sometimes even amazed to think how short I come of what I seem to be and of real acknowledging that God and living in that absolute blessed Covenant which I profess my self a sharer in And doth not these things require rough Dispensations inward or outward to awaken and send a poor Sinner home to that Advocate who is King Prophet and Priest to help But alas dry words my leanness my leanness yet strong is he who hath in some part already and will yet further one day totally remove all things that offend Let us bless him love him and honour all his ways The Lord help you and I to live above the Changes of this lower World There is a Magnanimity in Faith which overcometh the World if we could but attain that pitch The Lord establish our hearts and hopes upon himself he changes not and blessed be his Name I leave you with him and rest c. 1659. To D. D. N o 38. I Know no Refuge but in God and blessed be his Name his Name is a strong Tower this World is but a withering Portion a bad Prop to lean upon the Covenant of Grace will make amends for all I may not complain unless it be against my Unbelief God must have the Glory of all his works and therefore blessed again and again be his Name he hath not left his people whatever the World expect or think and therefore let us charge our hearts to resist sinful Melancholy his ways are still Mercy and Truth and the Children of Zion must shall and will rejoyce in their King a mighty King their and our Saviour The Lord is the Pilot of his Church and People the Vessel may be tost but cannot miscarry such honour and privilege have all believing Penitents The Clouds are thick below but the Lord rules above and hath said It shall be well with the Righteous And though I am unrighteous yet he who I desire to make the Object of my Faith is perfect and in his Righteousness I trust mine there I would cling and rejoyce in the hope of the Glory of God yet to be revealed c. 1659. To D. H. N o 39. SEeing our time here is a Warfare 't is a comfort to perceive the Lord's presence with any poor Soul so as to make it stand out in hope and prayer while Temptations and Corruptions like fiery Darts are flying thick on every side It never goes desperately ill with those that travel towards Zion and are acquainted with Assaults from Satan and hearttreachery from themselves till they begin secretly to whisper Rebellion against the Covenant and Law of God's Grace and say There is no help for me in God David's Excellency lay not so much that he was freer from Sin and sinful Miscarriages than others but in this that he could not endure to say or hear others say of him There is no help for him in God Psal 71. 11. c. 3. 2. and c. 42. 10. That was the Anchor that made him ride out Storms and the Rope that drew him up out of many a deep Pit Let us use the same means with reverence and yet with freedom God is a jealous God and cannot endure to be accounted changeable Jer. 33. 24 25. he keeps both ends of the Covenant and will not give the Glory of any part of that Trust out of his own hands Every Desire every Thirst and Exercise of Resolution or Hope heavenwards and every Soul and Body-deliverance to such ariseth from this viz. that God is faithful 2 Thes 3. 3. though our Labour and Prayer ought therein also to be employed viz. as the means which God has commanded on our part for a Closing with the efficatious vertue of his Spirit by believing whereby the force of Christ's Death and Resurrection becomes singly applicable to remove Guilt and confer a gracious Conformity to his Nature and the Law of Righteousness in the Soul I see you level at the right Mark and own your Relief from the right place and why may I not say You shall yet see greater things than these c. 1659. To D. H. N o 40. THe Lord be praised that you are within such a Covenant that nothing can befall us for evil while our eye is truly rolling heaven-ward yea within such a Covenant as is confirmed in the Blood of him who is able to turn the heart and eye heaven-ward That God hath dealt so favourably with your heart as to tie it to a hungry pursuit after him is much comfort to my Soul and matter of praise to his Name And I account it no small Mercy that my Child is under your care and both of you under God's gracious Wing When we acquaint one another that every day we live is a day of Battel and that the Enemy within us doth rage this is no reason of discouragement because the Battel is the Lords I am put every day to fly to the City of Refuge and I bless the Lord I never found the Gate quite shut against me yet I am forced sometimes methinks to squeeze in Which difficulty ariseth from my Unbelief and want of retaining a frame of tender Resignation not from any straitening in his Bowels but in my own but these days of distance are hastening away I perceive your eye grows dim the Lord bless the Means for Recovery however be not dismayed you shall want never an eye when your Body shall be raised incorruptibly 't is not long thither the Redeemer will be seen eye to eye and then farewel all Imperfections c. 1659. To D. H. N o 41. I Perceieve B. Cr. hath much trouble through Indisposition of Body and it is good it should be so though disquieting to the Flesh and you have a gracious share I perceive also In such Cases it will be some help to turn our thoughts from poring upon the Affliction it self and endeavour by all means to find out the Lesson which God is teaching thereby for that is properly and truly our work in that Christ hath born the Curse for us he hath taken away the wrathful Penalty and left only an awakening and instructory Nature in all the Afflictions that his People meet with Isa 27. 7 8 9. and 63. 9. Psal 89. 30 31 32 c. Oh that
in his Breath as in his Breathing so it is with spiritual Life exercising fresh and fresh Acts of Recourse to Jesus Christ And by this means the Soul comes at length to be bathed in the Comfort of his Truth and Love by an operating Faith Let my Condition be what it will inwardly or outwardly I am not to be dismayed from running to God and encouraging my self in him But my work is to listen out what God reproves or teacheth thereby holding this as an unmovable Truth That his love never fails from his People one moment and his People are they who in good earnest chuse him for their God whose very hearts fly and hanker after him such who come to God by Christ who design that as their Aim The whole Scripture doth justifie this plain difference between persons and persons viz. they who come to the light and they who hate it Joh 3. 20 21. Now I say My work is never to let my heart question his love to me If he has made me to hanker after him and if he loves continually then there is continually room for Access to him 'T is true that he hath suffered his People sometimes to fall grievously as David and others and he hid his face upon it But did we ever read that he did turn away from the Prayer of the Poor and while it is nothing else but his own Spirit interceding in them and Christ for them 'T is not imaginable though he seems not to answer sometimes yet he loves their voice continually Faith viz. an acting out of our own Life in the Life and spirit of Christ for all manner of good from God by him is and was always a conquering successful Grace In the greatest Surge it gives either Contentation or it hastens the opening of the Door for Deliverance and usually both together one way or other 'T is a sad thing that when we should be exercising Faith for getting the good of an Affliction and prying after further Discoveries of God's Truth Love and Wisdom and enquiring what the voice of our Father is and what it means I say it is a sad thing that at that time we should spend our thoughts in an unseasonable distrust of an Interest in him His Rod his Trials walk up and down among his People to shew he is their Father and his Discipline is amongst his Children and yet we are apt to take the very sign of our Reconciliation and make it an occasion of our distrust that we are not related to him This Wisdom comes not from above but is carnal sensual and unworthy of them who have heard the Word of Faith yea and accepted it also for many years 'T is bad tempting God and vexing his Spirit in that which provoketh him most But if I think I was not related to him before let me fly to him in Christ now and I shall be his though I was not actually so before for he casts away no sincere Comer But I do suppose you armed by the Lord to encounter these Assaults and am persuaded your Faith will grow by every Trial yea when 't is most assaulted you will be made to expect some good in the Rear which will make you glorifie God even in the Fires Dear Sister I commend you to the Lord Christ prays for you and therefore your faith cannot fail He will be Eyes to the Blind Feet to the Lame He will give Grace and Glory and no good thing will he with-hold c. 1661. To T. N. N o 56. IN pursuance of my Promise and also that the mutual Remembrance of each other may be kept alive I account my self engaged to present you these Lines 'T is one comfort that the Lord rules the World yea no other but that God to whom the Supplications of his People are always acceptable in Jesus Christ and that nothing can be perfectly miserable to them who are constituted Heirs of Blessing and past away from the Curse through the Curse of Christ And though the glorious Arm and Truths of God seem to be overwhelmed in the World yet when God shall appear to vindicate his Name and cloath himself with Jealousie what Obstruction shall hinder his Course or stop his hand I know you are not only strugling with difficulties without as well as I am but with Enemies within and truly that is my case also And I know nothing that keeps me from being overwhelmed but only this viz. some blinks of the free and eternal unchangeable Bounty of God who has for his own sake only pitch'd upon such an unworthy Creature and caused my Soul to hanker after him When I am tired out with my own Darkness Infirmity Pollution and Unbelief his good Spirit is pleased sometimes to sway my heart to throw my self Body and Soul and all my Sins and Cares upon him through Jesus Christ and so out of my own Shame and Confusion of face there darts in sometimes a Beam of Relief from him who quickeneth the Dead and calleth the things that are not as if they were Could we come off more smoothly to own and catch that Hold upon Jesus Christ which the Word of God's Grace doth invite us to we might lanch forth and venture securely in the Ark Jesus Christ when there is not a Foot of dry Ground here below to stand upon When we cannot pray then to remember Christ intercedes When we are all over defiled and confused to remember the Mediator is cloathed with our Nature and that on our behalf in perfect Purity and in the same Nature which each of us doth bear He did conquer over all that which we are as yet conflicting with in his Name That we are esteemed not according to our present Infirmity but according to that Perfection to which we are entitled in him who is at God's Right Hand Could we be more exercised in this view and blessed prospect it would make our dry and dead Limbs recover heat and life as it was with Jacob when he heard that Joseph was yet alive Joseph our Brother is yet alive And all Power is committed into his hands he has the Keys of Hell and Death and is himself the Door of Life also Oh how unpersuadable are our hearts for the most part and loath to credit the Word of his Grace and Truth so far as to resign up our selves our sins our burthens of all sorts to the vertue and power of his Atonement and Soveraignty who has ended all differences and brought in an everlasting Righteousness and Good Will that a righteous God and sinful Man might be reconciled together in him who has ballanced the Account exactly and being gone has left a Legacy of Blessing and Peace to every Soul that flees to him to feed upon till the days of full refreshing appears and we see him as he is When I only muse my own weakness it makes me more weak while I converse with anxious thoughts it makes my heart dark sower and
is most wise creep into him as near as you can and be assured the nearer you creep thither the better welcome and the more will your heart be composed The good hand of the Lord be with you c. 1667. To B. D. N o 86. I Do begin to long after a Line or two more from you how it stands as to your inward Man for that part is oft on my heart concerning you The Lord is favourable to me I have both the visitation of his favourable Frowns and Smiles and his Frowns are very wholsome for he never leaves me nor breaks so much as one Clause of his Covenant for his mercy endureth for ever I and my Family are in health I may say The Lord is my Shephard I shall not want any good thing Our God is a sweet Portion and Heaven a perfect Rest let us spring upwards and all will be well Your condition is often and sometimes solemnly presented by us before the Lord Who is a God hearing Prayer 'T is a comfort to me to think you are in his hands and that he will assuredly guide you by his Counsel until he has brought you to Glory I commend you to his care and kindness c. 1667. To J. A. N o 87. I Always perceive your friendly respect to me for which I return you many thanks As for the former part of your Letter there remaineth nothing on my thoughts that needeth any Apology from you for I never found your Lines any other than the meer proceed of Integrity and entire Affection towards me and therefore always very acceptable and the rather because they do not only leave Conviction upon me being privy to the burthen of mine own evil heart I groan under but are also by way of spur a good and weighty motive to stir up my Soul to pursue the harder after that Mark which I should and do daily long to attain unto Poor Worms as we are may hear and behold one another sometimes with some moral and affectionate Impressions but Oh what an influential Object is Jesus Christ who when yearningly beheld transforms the Soul into the same likeness and indeed the Graces of his Spirit in his People also improved through the Communication of the head have great force through that Communication to quicken one another All this tends to exalt that Fountain of Life and Grace in Christ that feeds all the Streams with its own vertue And blessed be for ever the God of all Grace that has called you and I into that glorious Fellowship and Communion To him we may complain and be pitied in him we may boast and can never exceed there Affection may be inflamed without danger for he infinitely surmounts all our love and all our praises into whose gracious Arms my dar Friend I commend you c. 1668. To B. D. N o 88. WE see how uncertain things below are but our Interest in the unchangeable Covenant of Grace will never fail nor deceive us that still you may say the Lord is good and every thing will work together for good if we let not go our Confidence The good and gracious God spread his Wing over you and direct and manage your Concernments for you You are much upon my heart praying that you may have the presence of God preserving and supporting your heart and ordering your Affairs I can commend you to him as one whom he is pleased through Christ to own within the rich sweet and precious Covenant of his Grace and whom he will care for and never leave till you are fully freed from every heart-oppressing care Therefore in the midst of all Cloudy Dispensations rouse up Faith and so pass through till you arrive at the Port of true Rest where the Fore-runner is entred for you There is a Rock which is not capable of Concussion A believing heart well digesting the 46th Psalm may behold Terrour without dismaying dread An unchangeable God is still the same Refuge in the midst of all other Changes To that Rock I commend you 1668. To C. E. D. N o 89. I Apprehend it a providential favour of God to me who gave me an opportunity of seeing my dear Cousin your Husband before the Lord removed him hence that I might have some fresh taste of the frame of his Soul when he stood upon the brink of Eternity ready to lanch forth I know it is an afflicting Providence to you to be deprived of the Society of so dear a Relation after you had so long enjoyed the Endearment of each others Affections and had passed through many afflicting Dispensations together in this Vale of trouble and had also I doubt not many joynt Applications to God praying together and according to the ability which God gave endeavouring to promote each others spiritual and everlasting Welfare But herein there is matter of Consolation and thankfulness to God not only that he lent you this choice Comfort through so many years of your Pilgrimage but that he caused you to see his faithfulness and goodness in carrying this your dear Husband through to the end of his spiritual Warfare and that God preserved him from staining his Profession in the eyes of the World and has rendred the remembrance of him precious amongst his People and fulfilled his Word touching him Mark the righteous Man and behold the upright c. And what though he be taken out of our sight for a little time there is no reason to repine that the Lord hath seen it good to take him into the Vision and perfect Fruition of himself among the Blessed as he hath given us ground to be fully persuaded and has now put an end to his troubles and disquiets has healed his aches cured his diseases and removed his pains of Body translated him from this World where he is yet pleased to leave you for a further exercise of your faith and patience And now what remains but that you gird up the Loyns of your Mind to run the remainder of your own Race And while you are here in time breath after the same eternal Rest rejoycing amidst all Trials and believing that our faithful and gracious God who has begun his good Work in your heart will never cease till he hath carried you through and landed you safe beyond all temptation sin and sorrow Into the hands of this gracious God I commend you c. 1668. To M. S. N o 90. I Am loath to omit the giving you a Line or two by my dear Sister who is this Morning turning over one Leaf more of her wandring Pilgrimage God is pleased so to order it that methinks I can hear little from any of my dear Friends but stories of worldly perplexity and who are they who are one way or other without their share therein This Life is like a troublesome Dream but blessed are they who when once the Dream is out and when once they come to awake shall be satisfied with realities of true
let them be glorious in this World in Holiness and be bound up with thee for ever in the Covenant of Grace into which thou hast called them Let my poor Friends that have loved me and have seen but little Grace something it may be they have seen through thy Goodness Oh be with them and make them grow abundantly Let thy Glory arise hasten it let the Kingdom of Christ be exalted Oh that the days of this Darkness may be blown away and let there be a mighty coming in of Truth Holiness Sincerity and spiritual Light and Manifestation that there may be a mighty Child-like Spirit in all thy Children I desire all these Petitions in truth Let thy People be the Wisdom the Truth the Joy of the Earth Be with me and be with all thine and this I beg in the Lord Jesus Let thy good Spirit come upon all thine Oh glorifie thy self now and ever Oh let thy good Will be done Oh let thy own Will be done Let my Will follow thy Will as the Thread follows the Needle and let it be so eternally Let my Soul believe every word that thou hast spoken shall be accomplished Thou wilt never leave till thou hast made thy Name conspicuous and all thy People rejoyce Oh why why why may not the slow coming on now make haste Oh why may not the Growth of spiritual Wisdom be sprouting forth with great Improvement as being the very Operation of the Spirit Why may not Love to thee come and damp all other Loves Why may not the Observation of thy Love thou shewest me be powerful and transforming of my Soul Why should I lie back Lord I am not sanctified at the rate thou usest means for the same Oh that I might have more of the Spirit much much more and may see the Power of God from Heaven mightily changing me Oh let not thy Spirit be wanting Oh let Truth and Power be given in O God fill the World with thy Spirit that thy work may be done tidily tidily Oh let there be a nearness between thee and the Souls of thy People Oh that never that dull Spirit in Religion may come into the World again a God-provoking Temper of Soul Oh that thy People may judge of their love to thee by the very Out-goings of their Souls to thee and account nothing a Token of Love to thee unless the Soul be as it were in some Surprizes of being thine joyned to thee perfectly as if it were about to be carried out of the World I have been a withered dry Branch Oh hasten a Spring-time in one World or another Thou hast given me Truth in the inward parts I bless thee but there is no Answer answerably I wait now I wait every day and every night a poor Waiter I am O Lord be found Oh let God be glorified Oh that I might see Religion to be something I have professed Religion scores of Years one after another and yet to have got no more of the Glory of the Grace of that Religion methinks doth import that the Devil hath a strange debilitating power but God is pleased to leave him to put a slur upon the Glory of Christ's Church in the Life of Grace and to make the ways of God seem not so exceeding different from the way of Flesh as it is and all this for Trial and all this for Shame when the eyes of the spiritual Mind be a little opened Oh when a little satisfaction is got that there is truth of Grace how doth a seduced Soul nuzzle it self in that that it is safe and doth not make out for a great Progress in Grace and Holiness And if God should leave that Soul at last under those terrible Trials that may arise from thence it may shake and put it into a terrible Consternation Alas never can I fly too far from that devouring Lion never can I fly too soon April 16. Ah sweet Grave where I shall not need any cooling Drink Being spoken to from a near Friend viz. I hope the Lord will give you in of himself some such Prospect as he did to Stephen when he was leaving the World He replied I have a little sight of him and I find no dark passage to the enjoyment of him To another Friend he said He that hath you by the hand will never leave you To a near Relation he spake thus Say to your Soul I have a Fountain that will never dry up My Lines are fallen to me in a pleasant place yea I have a goodly Heritage There should be frequent fondnesses between God and us as Children towards their Parents He farther declared that though he had an earnest desire to be gone hence yet if the Lord pleased he could be content and willing to be the last Man in the Brunt of Suffering for his sake and Name in this World or words to that effect Again he spake saying O Lord come quickly come quickly answer me by thy self My wise God is still pleased to continue me though there are no signs of a Reserve for further Service to him in this World I bless the Lord for his Goodness towards me The Consolation of God is no small thing it is no small thing it is strong Consolation the Consolation of Christ is a great thing April 17. A Friend taking his leave of him saying that he was going to visit a Person of Honour he spake to this effect Pray remember me to my Lord and tell him that I am an Expectant hoping for a Meeting where we may dwell for ever April 18. In the Morning he spake saying O Lord how do I pass through nights and days O wise God and dost thou speaking to himself account him so Lord make me to account thee wise and good Lord pardon me and receive me O happy day that is coming O blessed day that is coming I pass through Death unto eternal Life After that he said The Captive shall return there will be no Captivity O sweet Redemption Much of our Heaven here lies but in a little talk about it and when we speak a word of it we have scarce a Thought suitable to the greatness of it Some space after he fetch'd a deep Groan and with his eyes lifted up and his Right hand stretched forth as if the pains of death were upon him he said Sharp and welcome Sharp and welcome And a while after he said praying Lord let me not die with any Guilt upon me but leave it all behind Oh let not any Sin remain in me unrepented of Let not any Concurrence with the least Guilt be in me Let there be upon my Will an edge of Hatred against every Sin Create it in me now Thou canst make me to delight in that that is contrary to my own Will Oh let thy Will be pleasing to me and let my Will be every way according to thy Will Let not the Agonies of Death be too terrible let not the Surge of it be too