well and what then Such is the Stat. of Ed. 3. the only law declaring Treason if I do thus dye my guilt is real or reputed Suppose my guilt were real for Lord thou knowest mine innocency wherein I stand defamed to die a malefactor is not inconsistent with eternal salvation I may die for my sin and not dye in my sin I may be most justly punished by men that others may hear and fear Deut. 13.11 and do no more so wickedly for that sin which may be pardoned by the Lord I may be condemned in the world for that crime which shall never be charged on me by my God my present punishment may provoke my repentance and my repentance will most certainly procure me Gods if not the Kings mercy Divine grace is not barred by humane justice the theif crucified with Christ received and confessed so much the due reward of his evil Luk. 23.41 43. yet this hindred not his souls being that night in Paradise with his Saviour and fellow-sufferer The crime not the condition must divide between God and the soul as it doth divide the soul from the body but repentance is the spunge of guilt where God giveth repentance he denieth not remission of the most egregious crime to the most heinous offendor The hand of humane justice may be the help of the sinners repentance and then Tyburn or Tower-hill may be as near as good yea a much better way to Heaven then any other Happy is the stroke of justice 2 Chron. 33.12 which may save the soul from hell Manasseh's fetters made him see confess and abandon his sin the Elect of God are not exempt from the greatest crimes they may fall into and commit them But this is their happiness they are sure to repent thereof and therefore they shall not be eternally condemned for them I envy not some late condemned executed malefactors The murtherous Judges of his late Majesty K. C. first their confidence of salvation and eternal life but I heartily wish that for the glory of God the honour of Christian martyrdom credit of true Religion the real comfort of their friends as well as their own salvation they had more freely and more openly owned their guilt most odious in the light of nature much more of Scripture confessed their sin and justified God and man by their contrition and due confusion under the just sentence of a most righteous law I cannot but think repentance had been more proper matter for their professions then their insultation and rejoycing in their sufferings as if in and for the Lord and their peace joy and courage whereof their surviving friends boast not observing the same abstracted from that humiliation and pensive demeanour most Christianly suitable to so just and sad sufferings If there be in me any real guilt for which I have deserved to dye I pray God convince me of it for I yet see it not and affect me with it if in any thing I have violated the Law though through error or ignorance God give me grace to justifie the righteousness of that law by which I may be condemned and then if my suffering the sentence of the law work in me a sence of guilt unto a penitential submission under the hand of God through faith in Christ my Saviour I shall see cause to confess Gods abundant goodness in saving my soul by the condemnation execution and loss of my boby But O Lord thou knowest the crime by which I stand defamed for which I may be unjustly condemned is reputed and not real for my heart never yet admitted or entertained the least evil thought against the King the Lords anointed if then I dye in mine innocency and as a malefactor my death may administer to me more joy then greif more comfort then contrition more confidence then confusion for howsoever men may condemn me God and mine own conscience will acquit and justifie me Nor am I the first the only one that hath been oppressed in judgement this is one of the common evils under the sun belonging to Gods immediate peculiar vengeance Eccles 7.15 and 5.8 there is a just man that perisheth in his righteousness if thou seest the oppression of the poor and the violent perverting of justice and judgement in a Provinces marvail not at the matter for he that is higher then the highest regardeth it and he is higher then they I pray God prevent Englands King and Kingdom from slaying poor In this God hath graciously answered my desire envied and despised me for mine innocent blood will hurt them more then their stroak can possibly hurt me they can but kill my body work for me the glory of a martyr send me to my place and state of rest but this will hazard their souls gall their consciences cast them under the guilt and odium of violence persecution and murther by the sword of justice stain the land with blood which will cry for Gods vengeance and their repentance As for me I am in your hands do with me as seemeth good and meet unto you But know ye for certain that if ye put me to death ye shall surely bring innocent blood upon your selves upon this City and upon the inhabitants thereof for of a truth the Lord hath sent me and stirred me up to speak and write all the words which I have sounded in your ears The reproach of my suffering as a malefactor will indeed and for a time cloud my credit darken my sufferings and deprive God of the honour of them making them a stone of stumbling to many a rock of offence to the weak and wicked but they shall not in the least eclipse the glory of my sufferings and innocency in the sight of God and good men or in the sence of mine own conscience As for me let all men know I wait for a resurrection of names as well as certainly as a resurrection of bodies when the great Judge of all the Gods on earth shall appear to call over the process take cognizance of the error and reverse the false judgement passed by the sons of the mighty Whilst my God and my conscience witness true Religion enforced by right reason to be whole the onely and the real cause of my suffering why should I be troubled at the clamour and seeming black charge of Treason whilst the fulfilling my ministry and the faithful dischardge of my duty is the real ground and only cause of mens wrath and my death Shall I be dismayed that I am Arraigned Condemned and executed so as to be reputed a Malefactor have not all Gods Prophets and Apostles been presented to the World as evil doers and as such exposed unto and derided in their sufferings was not Jeremiah charged with Treason Jer. 37.13 15. Act. 24.5 and Paul with Sedition and both as such imprisoned and afflicted Elijah was the troubler of Israel was not Amos expelled the Court as a Dangerous
shall when dead know by experience what I have long desired earnestly prayed and industriously laboured to know by the Spirit of wisdom and understanding viz What is the Riches of the glory of the inheritance of the Saints Eph. 1.18 Now I have finished my course on earth I must go to Heaven that I may there receive my Crown may course here hath been the continual exercise of Grace my condition hereafter must be the constant enjoyment of Glory the place in which my soul must now abide the business in which my soul shall be employed the company with which my soul shall associate and the qualities with which my soul shall be endowed are all glorious these things are all transcendently glorious I cannot but desire they should be my soul cannot but leap for joy to think these glories are Eternal The place in which my soul shall abide whilst parted from Heaven a glorious place yea when reunited to my body is glorious transcendently glorious for it is Heaven My constant future residence must be in the Court of Heaven the Heaven of heavens the third heavens the Paradise of God the place into which the Apostle Paul was taken up in which he heard words not fit to be uttered 2 Cor. 12.2 4. and in which he saw Glories which he could not declare the Court of the great King the King of Saints and the King of Kings the peculiar Palace of Gods most glorious presence the holy the heavenly Jerusalem Rev. 21. the great City whose gates are pearl whose pavement is gold and whose foundations are precious stones unto which the Kings of the earth do bring their glory and honour in which there is no need of Sun or Moon for the glory of God doth lighten it and the Lamb is the light thereof into which there shall in no wise enter any thing which defileth neither whatsoever worketh abomination or maketh a lye but they only whose names are written in the lambs book of life My soul Dost thou linger to go unto or dost thou fear too long continuance in this place of glory How have humane sences been ravished with the glory of the structures raised by humane Art how much have I admired the glorious workmanship of God in the bespangled firmament the most curious enamelling the same with the Sun Moon and Stars and yet these are but dark shadows most imperfect representations of Heavens glory and how far how freely did the Queen of the South travel to see with what ravishing observation did she admire how blessed did she esteem the men who did reside in the state of Solomons structures wilt thou my soul flock to God and see yea and fit down in the place prepared by the Lord for his blessed ones before the foundation of the world was laid the glimpse of this glorious Kingdom when the Lord Jesus was transfigured did so ravish the three Disciples that they thought it was good to be there and began to cast how to build tabernacles Matth. 17.2 3 4. that they might there abide Can I chuse but long to see and to set down my station in the very place its self where our Lord is ever in the truth and fulness of his glory Come my soul goe forth with joy and thou shalt at once possess that place of glory from which thou canst no more remove nor wilt desire to do it in which the eternity of thy residence is and will be the excellency of thine injoyment it would more grieve thee to go from then not at first to have come to Heaven The business in which my soul shall be employed in this glorious place is also glorious In heaven the work is glorious for after death attendance on and acclamation of praise to God and Jesus Christ shall be the whole the only employment of mine immortal soul beatifical vision shall be its business I shall then know God as I am known of God I have here beleived in him whom I have not seen rejoyced with joy unspeakable and full of glory but shall then see him in whom I have beleived I shall see the Lord Jesus Christ not darkly as in a glass but face to face how full how unspeakable how glorious must needs be the joy which reflecteth from my sence how must it needs transcend that which was onely the result of faith my soul when parted from my body shall as the glorious Angels now do minister continually in Gods immediate presence and behold his glory Happy were Solomons servants who stood continually before him and heard his wisdom Behold my soul a greater then Solomon is here thou shalt attend on minister before and hear the wisdom and behold the glory of the God of Solomons wisdom and glory The souls which come out of great tribulation are arayed in white robes and advanced unto continual attendance on the throne of God to serve him in his Temple night and day where the whole of their business is and for ever shall be to sing Halelujahs unto the Lord to admire the majesty wisdom power goodness of God to ascribe wisdom blessing honour power and glory unto God for ever and ever to him who sitteth on the throne and to the Lamb for euer Gods service was on earth my perfect freedom it must needs be much more such in Heaven when I am once arrived at this estate of Glory I shall be indeed and for ever delivered from all mine enemies that I may serve him without fear all my days which shall never end Oh the honor of relation to such a Master oh the happiness of employment in such business It is a good thing to sing praise unto our God it is pleasant and praise is comely Oh the glory of attendance on so glorious Majesty my soul canst thou wish thy time in a relation so honourable in an employment so happy in an attendance so glorious were as the days of an hireling God forbid Lovest thou the service of thy God shall the length of thy servitude dismay thee Wilt thou not consent yea desire to be boared through the ear that thou mayst abide in this thy masters service for ever Dost thou long to turn thy faith into sence thy hope into fruition thy prayers into praises thine apprehensions of God and Christ into immediate attendance on them is it possible thou shouldst dread the eternity of this estate thou so much so earnestly desirest art thou my soul capable of surfeiting with spiritual joyes dost thou not love and long to drink thy fill to be drunk with the rivers of pleasure which flow continually in Gods presence how have I mourned under the withdrawings of Gods presence shall I now fear to approach his presence onely because I shall never more be banish'd from his Court presence My soul chear up in Heaven the frowns and frettings of thy Master shall not make thee weary of waiting on him his terrors shall no more make
it cannot hinder my graces from going with me to Heaven though I must at death leave my outward comforts this is mine advantage I may retain and carry with me mine integrity My soul death shall not meddle with thy best treasure be therefore content to part with thy worst enjoyments thine outward comforts whilst thy tottering tabernacle must fall thine earthly cottage must be burnt rejoyce and bless God that thou canst save any thing much more that thy best goods thy substance is escaped and secured for being herewith stored thou shalt possess an estate much more plentiful and pleasant then what thou hadst in this life and world Death cuts me off from my relations but casteth them on God SECT X. DEath will cut me off from my dear Relations whose dependance hath been on my care for them but it will then dispose them under the more immediate care protection Psal 68.5 Hos 14.3 and providence of God who is judge of the Widows case and with whom the Fatherless find mercy It peirceth my soul to hear the Wife of my bosom cry Oh Husband What shall become of me when thou the covering of mine eyes art taken from me and to hear my Children cry What shall become of us when our careful compassionate Father is gone be still my soul submit yeild unto my God even so father for so it seemeth good unto thee Is it not my duty by an act of faith to cast my fatherless Children on the Lord have I not taught and often assured my Widow she must trust in God was it not the Lord who provided for them by me in vain had I risen early gone to bed late eaten the bread of carefulness if God had not built my house Shall I think the same God cannot or shall I fear he will not provide for them without me they may be put upon some more sensible straits to exert some more special acts of faith more eminently to exercise some graces but they have the same assurance and some better security that they shall enjoy food convenient the Fountain abideth full and flowing though not by the same pipe and conduit which is cut off it is Gods property and promise to take care of the Widow and Fatherless especially of such who are so made for the testimony of his truth Why do I disquiet my self for the sadness of that condition which setteth my dear Relations in a more special dependance on God and secureth to them the more peculiar providence of God I love them I have looked after them whilst I lived I will now leave the care of them to him who expressed it by me who can and will express the same without me who is charged with them by his own property and promise who is more immediately more eminently bound to look after them by taking thus taking me from them O my God! give my Wife and Children a fear of thee submission to thee and faith in thee be thou the Husband of my Widow and the Father of my fatherless Children that to the praise of thee who failest not they may tell the world the unbeleiving world they lost nothing by loosing thus loosing me they traded to good advantage by freely willingly cheerfully contentedly giving up a most loving Husband and tender Father to the pleasure of a gracious faithful never failing God who stayeth with them and careth for them when he by death doth take me from them SECT XI AFter death Death hindreth me from knowing what is done under the sun and so I shall know no evil I must lie down in the pit I shall be covered with darkness I shall not know what is done under the Sun This will indeed be my state but yet whilst I lie down in the pit I shall abide in safety and be delivered from my brethrens rage and fury My Brother Reuben proveth most faithful and affectionate by letting me down into the pit he thereby secureth not onely my life but also my liberty against my brethrens malice their hands cannot then reach me to do me hurt they cannot draw me thence to sell and enslave me to any Ishmaelite their envy may enquire for me but they shall not find me I shall be preserved in safety and preferred to glory when their entangled state shall affect their hearts and make them with bitterness to remember and confess they are verily guilty concerning their brother in that they saw the anguish of his soul Gen. 42.21 when he besought them and they would not hear him my being put into the pit is the passage to glory God hath determined for his beloved Josephs If darkness cover me it doth the better suit my sleeping state and capacitate me thereunto light is indeed pleasant to the eye but it is perturbing preventing when men desire to sleep my gracious God layeth me in the grave as in an house of darkness and as on a bed of silence that my wearied body may the better sleep and take its rest until it shall be awakened by his last trumpet which shall summon me to meet my Lord in glory I have no great cause to be troubled for that Nothing but evil under the sun to be known I shall not know what is done under the Sun for there can be little done against me after I am dead nothing that can hurt me suppose mens foolish envy should digg up my stinking carcass to burn or bury it under the Gallows they may annoy themselves they cannot afflict me sure I am they can do nothing under the Sun which shall concerne me when I am dead why shall I be so curious as to covet the knowledge of other mens affairs I might possibly know some good by my life but that will be but very little but I were therein sure to know very much evil and such evil as would and must afflict me whilst I know nothing under the Sun I shall not know the prophaness blasphemies impieties injustice oppressions violence superstitions perfidies perjuries and persecutions which are done under the Sun all which would call for and constrain greif in my soul and tears from my eyes seeing I could not know a little good without knowing so much evil shall I not be content to be freed from a so vexatious burden as is the knowledge of things under the Sun I hate life Eccles 2.17 because the work which is wrought under the Sun is greivous unto me for it is vanity and vexation of spirit What if I do not know what is done under the Sun After death I shall know much good I shall know much better things my soul the seat and subject of mine understanding shall be acquainted with and fully apprehend the glories which are above the Sun I shall then know the depths of divine mercy the mysteries of mans salvation 1 Cor. 13.12 I shall then know as I am known I shall perfectly know God and Christ shall I stick to
may exist to enjoy my redemption by him and my relation to him though the Lords special care is for my soul as my better and more noble part he hath not excluded he doth not despise he will not neglect my body My soul and body are now joynt subjects of grace they must therefore hereafter be joynt subjects of glory they have in this world been joynt agents oâ— duty to God and joynt patients in dolour for God they must therefore in the world to come be joynt heirs of dignity and joynt possessors of comfort from the Lord. After all the changes which shall or can pass and return upon my body God will gather up my dust bring together my scattered bones raise up this very body and reunite it to this very soul my body which shall corrupt and consume to nothing shall be raised the very same for substance that it now is but it shall then be cloathed with more excellent qualities most suitable to the excellency of my soul in that estate of glory it shall be raised up to enjoy my body is now sown in corruption 1 Cor. 15.42 43 44. but it shall be raised in incorruption it is sown in dishonour it shall be raised in Glory it is sown in weakness it shall be raised in power it is sown a natural body it shall be raised a spiritual body what then do I loose by having my body for a time resolved into nothing consumed into dust I loose nothing but the enjoyment of my self for a little season which being expired I shall return and re-enjoyn my self to very much advantage doth not the Husbandman joy to see his seed rot in the ground because he hopeth to receive the same body with better qualities shall not I through grace be willing to be resolved into nothing that I may be restored better O fool 1 Cor. 15.36 no seed is quickened unless it first dye my soul resist not the pleasure rebuke not the order of my Maker if he kill to make alive dissolve that he may restore my body with the most blessed change of qualities to the same substance wilt thou dispute or decline his will come be content cheerfully shake hands with my body and let it go leave it look no more after it though it be lost from thee it is not lost from God or Christ nor is it lost for ever when Christ shall appear I my self shall my whole self consisting of soul and body Col. 3.4 shall appear with him in glory for he will raise me from the dead Phil. 3.2 and change my vile body that it may be fashioned like unto his glorious body I cannot but pray that God would deliver me my body from wicked men who are his sword his hand to cut it down and reduce it into nothing yet my father not my will but thy will be done I will submit I will be content I will wait my appointed time till my change shall come and I will retain the confidence and possess my soul in the comfortable expectation of my resurrection for as for me I shall behold thy face in righteousness Psa 17.15 I shall be satisfied when I awake and arise in thy likeness SECT XX. DEath is that dreadful gulf Death entereth mâ— into eternity buâ— it is of good which once shot lancheth mine immortal soul into the ocean of Eternity Eternity what is that a word of astonishment an estate of amazement I cannot look into it without heart-sinking thoughts soul-troubling apprehensions It is a depth unfathomable a length and breath immeasurable an height undiscernable a continuance undeterminable and unexspirable but yet Eternity is in all these respects an estate most proper to mine immortal soul herein an eternal subject shall solace it self in its eternal object unto all Eternity Times return hath been the lamentation of my life Times return is troublesome because it was the limitation of my comforts were mine estate never so pleasant to me in respect of my health wealth plenty peace friends and familiars or the like enjoyments the discernable approaching period of them hath bidden a stand to my delight in them and damped mine affections towards them The things which are seen are temporal but the things which are not seen are eternal 2 Cor. 4.18 sensual pleasures have the wings of the morning they pass away with time but Eternity is an adjunct a property which stampeth no mean degree of excellency on those glorious invisible objects which are proposed to our faith to counterpoise those visible but temporal good things which captivate our sence My soul in Eternity thou shalt not be tired with telling the fleeting hours with observing the rerurning days moneths or years thine expectation of good or evil shall not then be tedious thou shalt be by death transported and resolved into perfect full and for ever enjoyment of perfect good and that without alteration or degree without encrease or diminution without consumption or expiration Thou shalt now possess an everlasting noon day thy sun shall no more rise nor set time shall be to thee no more thine autumne shall abide fresh and green fair and fruitful without the least change by the encreasing reviving spring or by the chilling clouding killing winter thy stars shall not be clouded thy moon shall know no changes in this estate of Eternity There shall be no Sun Moon or Stars thou shalt not need and therefore thou shalt not have those directions and determinations of time for thy day shall abide in its perpetual brightness without any dawning or the least approach of night Eternity existeen not in it self Eternity an adjunct to the best things it is a property which passeth on some condition 〈◊〉 adjunct quality which standeth not alone but existeth in its subject My soul look unto and secure the subject then wilt thou soon see that Eternity is a quality greatly desirable an adjunct unto thy great advantage when death shall determine thy days it shall lanch thee into but it shall not leave thee fluctuating on the uncertain waves of Eternity for the spirit goeth unto God who gave it and as the tree falleth so it lieth thou shalt most certainly be set in that estate which must be thine Eternal estate without any possibility of alteration or expiration thou by death sailest into the sea of Elernity or rather thou passest through the red sea unto the resting refreshing shores of eternal salvation an eternal inheritance eternal glory and eternal life these are the blessed subjects in which thinâ— Eternity must and shall exist Haâ—â— thou not in this life tasted the â—weetness of those objects hast thou not proposed these as that silver bell for which thou hast run the race of righteousness are not these the recompence of reward at which thou hast looked as thine encouragement to all thy travel and in all thy trouble in expectation of these I have despised the shame and endured