are our bodies but the food of worms Our gaudy Attires but nourishment for Moths Our stately pyled Houses but stones and morter Our most precious Jewels but the excrements of an enraged Sea which borrow their worth from our weak fancy and all our honours but the golden Masks and Weather-cocks of inconstancy O unfortunate Worldling Where then are thy thoughts fixed What is here in the world that can deserve thy love Behold the whole Fabrick of the Creation and see what thou canst meet with worth thy affection Canst thou then embarque thy self among such trecherous Syrens Seest thou not that thy riches friends reputation companions and all will at last forsake thee as a Butterfly which escapes the hand of a childe Whereat then aims thy strong Ambition What means thy burning Avarice Thy profuse Ryot What will one day become of thy wretched profit thy fading pleasures Will not all vanish into fancy and a body of smoak and nothing avail thee when thy mouth shall be stopt with eternal silence Be not then so bad a Merchant as to sell things eternal for temporal It is for silly flies to gad only in the Sun-shine of this world This Enchantress which thou so much admirest and enjoyest after thy own lusts will at last prove but a very bad bargain full of vanity deception and sorrow Ah! That thou shouldest love poyson and embrace death That we should seek our own ruine and confusion Doth the world tempt thee to honour Oh despise it in humility If to Riches O scorn it in contentment And O my Soul Let not the wings of thy love to God be entangled with the bird-lime of temporal things God hath espoused thee a chaste Virgin to himself Let not those Love-tokens which he hath sent to engage thy Affections more strongly to himself seduce thy heart from him who except he may have the choicest will admit of none of thy love Temporal Goods cannot content the Soul and therefore deserve not our Love ALl the happiness and felicity of man in this world is a Dream it comes on we know not how and when it vanisheth we cannot so much as discern whether it is gone Yea How do all the possessions thereof pass away in an unperceived motion When we suppose them fast lock'd in our arms they creep from us in a mist or smoak which silently steals out at the chimnies top after it hath fouled and smutted it within Our life is but like the nest of some silly Bird whose best composure and materials are straw and dust and as soon doth the stately Palaces and Courts of the greatest Princes decay as the poor resting place of a Swallow comes dropping down at the approach of Winter What alas shall I say since wheresoever we reflect our eyes we shall finde cause sufficient to dissolve them into Tears If we look up to heaven while we behold our Country aloof we cannot but consider our selves in banishment If on earth it is but the upbraiding remembrance of our grave and how proudly soever we trample it under our feet at present it makes full account to have the disposure of our heads yea the greatest Emperours after death are found sitting in Vaults under earth in silence and mournful Majesty Neither is there any thing when all other Beauty Honours and happiness proves brittle and inconstant which remains to yeild us comfort but the benefit we receive from the few hours we spend in Prayer Meditation and the Exercises of a pious life Now now is the time that in one little part of an hour we may obtain pardon here which all Eternity shall not hereafter Now is the time that in one short day we may have more debts so given us then in all the years and times to come Here may we so lament for sins committed as to escape everlasting punishment Here 's nothing but the fearful cracks of ruines every where the dreadful roaring of storms and tempests on every side Our house still threatens its fall and we are with S. Stephen in the midst of a violent shower of stones on every hand and shall we not think of retyring our selves to our heavenly Countrey Shall we not willingly then leave the house of our Pilgrimage here for those glorious Mansions above O happy Countrey O blessed Mansions which are provided for us in our Fathers house But O Eternity Eternity How little do we think on thee Or strive to avoid those endless miseries and those perpetual nights of horrour and sadness which custome in sinning will assuredly bring upon us Alas What more fond then for a little earthly Beauty for Riches and for the love of this world to lose heaven and procure eternal wretchedness Alas How do all the sweet waters of our pleasures at last run hastily into a Sea of sorrows and bitterness How doth sadness dive into the bottom of the Soul when delights tickle us in the outside of the skin How like a bunch of Grapes saith S. Bernard are the Worldlings joys whose juyce is pressed out How full of disquietness are they Their fulness at best being seasoned with shame and repentance Oh! How do they like abortives die in the birth yea too often prove the executioners of the owners or leave us like a poor Pilgrim dispoiled by thieves We finde our Saviour disswading his Disciples from Ambition Matth. 20.20 and to call Riches thorns as bearing fair flowers but the fruit very bad yea serves as a shelter for Vipers and serpents Yet oh insatiable Avarice Whither dost thou transport our manners and understanding Ah! the forgetfulness of our condition Alas What are we Whence came we Was it not a few years since we were born naked creeping on the earth and having a mouth open to cries and hunger and do we think we have nothing except we possess all things Alas Our misery lies in our life we die when we do not die In our last end is all our happiness which will transport us from earth to heaven from Aegypt to Canaan if so be we make it our care to avoid as well the affections as the presence of all the creatures of this world and unite our selves to God by the practise of vertues which will serve as so many steps to glory Nor is there any other way to take away the sting of death or make our life comfortable Our honour will lie in the dust and sleep in a Bed of earth Our Riches will not deliver us in the day of wrath what if thou leave them behind to procure a few mourning weeds to attend thy Herse or erect some glorious Monument to thy memory yet will they at last rather afflict then relieve thee at the hour of thy passage Oh but thou wilt say thy friends shall help thee Alas All that they can do is but to attend thee to thy last resting place and to shed some friendly perchance feigned Tears for leaving them behinde thee Such miserable comforters are all things
thou canst think on here below When all things leave thee the love of God and a good Conscience will be thy familiar friends and which must ever attend thee That Balmof Gilead which must chear thee and that Palm of Peace which must at last crown thee And truly we have daylie need of God and not of man to help us One cries out here Wretch that I am who will help me out of misery Where shall I finde Tears enow to save me Another cries out What shall I do Must I needs leave my only Father my dear Husband my loving Brother my sweet and only Childe Oh let me die Some good body or other make an end of me The black clouds of sorrow somtimes so sadly overshadow us as that with Jacob we rend our clothes and will needs go down with sorrow to our Grave We often cry out What for ever In aeternum valedicere What to part for ever To forsake the world and all our friends what more troublesome What To take this young betrothed this poor Maid this intended Husband What To lay hold on one so well beloved in the flower of his age so fresh so flourishing so full of Honour and Prosperity O cruel and malicious Death What Hast thou Ears of Brass and Diamonds and wilt not hear our cries Alas What do I here I am but a living death and an unprofitable burden to the earth Why hadst thou not rather taken away this Begger that Cripple who hath not wherewith to live Ah Death Now shoot the utmost of thy Darts Thus do our humane respects too often seem to withstand the Divine Providence But oh thou that art thus unwilling to part with a Dunghil an earthly Cottage to enjoy a life of perpetual Beauty and felicity What alas may we think of thee That Heaven should open it self to thee and thou wilt neither embrace it nor open thy heart to love him that offers it Alas O Soul many times ungrateful and disloyal what wilt thou answer for so great a neglect when God shall call thee to an account Ah! If we love any thing in the world let us love it for life eternal The joys of heaven are without example Oh that we might then know our names to be written in the book of Life Oh how should we finde our Spirits ravished with those beautiful Ideas of glory Where can we more fitly commend our selves then unto so vast a bosom of Compassion as shall set a period to all the miseries of this sinful life To God I say who is an endless Ocean and boundless Sea of mercy How can we better fix our thoughts then on our crucified Saviour and in his countenance to read the lively characters of that infinite love he bears us the remembrance of death it self being sweet to those who lead their life so as to meet him comfortably as their Judge at the last day It will be no more to him to die then is one nights sweet repose on a bed of Roses Who can but behold the spirit of Jesus amongst those great Convulsions of the world moving round about the Cross in the midst of those bloody dolours insolent cries and insupportable blasphemies O behold and see him there as in a Sanctuary bleeding weeping and praying yea mingling his prayers with his tears and blood and at last to die unmoveably upon the Throne of his patience Oh madness of men That spend all their time encrease their account and lose so many fair opportunities when they might have gotten heaven for a tear a sigh or a groan from a penitent heart for the attaining of that which not only proves their eternal ruine hereafter but occasions their miserable vexation here O worldlings Thus to deceive your selves Who shall weep over you since you know not how to lament and bewail your selves Why alas are you so careful and tender of your bodies yet daylie entangle your poor souls in a thousand vanities a thousand Courtships and a thousand worldly loves which defile you and must one day be discharged at a dear rate Miserable wretches How will you then cry out what have we done Once had we time to have wrought out our salvation O precious time but these golden days are past And have we thus miserably undone our selves Come Rocks and fall upon us Come ye Furies and tear us until we moulder into nothing Sad creatures then as we are to procrastinate and put off our Repentance Since the Sun which goes so many miles in a minute and the Stars in the Firmament which go many more make not so much speed as our body hastens to the Grave The devouring sword the consuming fire the winds from the Wilderness the Diseases of the Body and all that afflicted holy Job are still at our heels what daylie reports do we hear Such a man is slain another is drowned a third breaks his neck this man died eating that man playing another sleeping this by accident that by his own hands Oh how great an Elephant and yet how small a Mouse can destroy us a pin a comb a hair pulled out hath gangren'd Nay our joy our mirth and laughter our shame and blushing may ruine us and in the very flower of our youth and blossome of our age we may be untimely nipt and sent down into the dust And alas If God but a little withdraw our breath vain is the power of art vain is the Physitians skill vain and fruitless are the sighs and tears of thy friends yea vain and helpless are the wishes of all our kinsfolk Here sits one weeping there another lamenting yet all to no purpose Neither is it Beauty or the Damask skin that can help us when we feel the slow pace of our panting pulse It is not mirth nor greatness which can then affect us when death in a moment shall dissolve all our honour into darkness The whole world cannot afford us content when our Soul is expiring from our body Neither can all her alluring baits smiling blandishments and beautiful temptations avail thee when thy spirits shall tremble with affrightful pangs when all thy senses shall decline and all the faculties of thy soul attempt which way soonest to leave thy body O then that we did but present unto our selves the sad and miserable condition at present and the happiness which is to come How effectual it would be to raise up our thoughts from the fading blossoms and perishing pleasures of this transitory world How would it comfort us in all conditions whatsoever How little would we care for the losses and crosses of this world did we think of a heavenly kingdom We are all in the time of our absence from God but strangers upon earth Let us then pass the time of our sojourning here in fear 1 Pet. 1.17 and then he needs not care for ill usage in his pilgrimage here who knows he is a King at home But alas We too often eat husks when we should
phantastick shadows which will at last pay me with nothing but grief shall I flatter my self with the specious hopes of the world which like Dreams of a delicious Fountain never quench the Thirst Ah much rather let me make an Eternal divorce from all those frivolous worldly hopes and look on Jesus as the Pole-star alwaies unmovable let me put my self between the arms of hope and amidst all disturbances of mind pass the veil and enter the Tabernacle of the Sanctuary whereinto he hath entered for our salvation Behold how the Soul is troubled as if through some melancholly fit she were fallen into an Abyss from which issue forth such an infinite quantity of evil vapours as cause night in the most cheerfull brightness and make the most pleasing Beauties to be beheld with affrightment The greatest punishment which can befall a sad and dolorous Soul in this world consisting in being suspended from the presence and sight of God And as it naturally desireth to rejoyn it selfe unto God and the least hinderance it feels is most irksome unto it so how doth it mourn to be deprived of so infinite a comfort which it alone depends on and to see it self bereaved of so great a happiness even by its own fault which is the Needle of the Dial which sheweth how our Souls circumvolve times and the hours of the day And well may she complain of the great distance between her and so infinite a bounty seeing the holy Scripture speaking of Love Gen. 34.3 saies It causeth one soul to claspe into another And truly did we but once begin to dislike the world and heartily to love Jesus Christ we should almost every moment think upon him all the most pleasing Objects of the world would seem mixed with Gall and Wormwood We should seek for our Saviour in all Creatures we should languish after him All that beareth his Name and memory will be delightful to him We shall speak of him in all companies desire to have him honoured esteemed and acknowledged by all the world our solitude would be in Jesus our discourse of Jesus Jesus will be in our watchings and in our sleep in our affairs and Recreations And Oh! how unwilling will be to lose sight of him though but for a little time Did we but once wipe those eyes surcharged with earthly Beauties and covered with a thick cloud of the worlds vanities how soon should we fix them upon the infinite love mercy and goodness of God How cheerfully vvould our Souls be carried with full flight into the bosome of our Saviour and be there held in a sweet Circle of ravishing contemplations our hearts would be as flaming Lamps which perpetually burn before the Sanctuary of the living God we should have but one main desire in the vvorld which is God himself all creatures vvhich use to be the Objects of our contentments will never more be the subject of our fears Neither should we like silly worms turn against God when he permitteth any thing to happen contrary to our liking we would frame unto our selves a life simple and free from all affectations we vvould learn to endure any slight oppositions vvith great tranquility vve vvould cast avvay our vvantonness our pleasures and petty peevishness neither vvould vve here think our selves immortal seeing that every moment vvhich is novv in our hands vve must divide vvith death and the Sun vvhich to day you have seen to rise out of his couch may before his setting see you in your Tomb. Oh horrour then to see men enraged with that avarice which sticks to their bones as doth their Marrow and shall sleep with them in their Grave to see them pride themselves in their Garments which are the food of Mothes to see them glittering with precious Stones which are the excrements of the Sea and Land to see them carrried in Coaches and on Horses which are the Notes of their poverty or to see them glory in Titles which are but imaginary Felicities Deceitful Beauties of the world then where are ye Ah true Turrets of Fairies which are onely in conceit where shall your allurements prevail from henceforth to what calamity do you reserve a wretched life deprived of strength and vigour to resist you and if it have any feeling it is onely of misery How few alas are your selicities in this world where your best lights have its shadows all fruit its vvorm and every Beauty fails not to have its embracements And vvhere are ye also ye admirers of the fortunes of Glass that happen to the vvicked where are these adorers of the Colossu's and heaps of dirt that appear by the help of false gildings and vvhich are immediately reduced to dust Hovv much better had ye been to have contemplated in that great School of Nature vvhere God speaketh to us and teacheth us lessons through the veil of his Creatures how happie had ye been had ye looked upon these delights below as men blind whereby ye would the better have looked up to heaven and into your selves that ye had heard of the worlds vanities as being deaf and no waies ravisht by them as discoursing of them and yet no way concerned Thus should he have been as men in part translated to Heaven and here become earthly Angels For Oh! how little doth the pomp of the world seem to that Soul who every day drowns part of his life in Tears and through long solitude hath purged it selfe from the impurities of the Earth Oh how contemptible do all those Beauties of dust and fortunes of wind seem to that heart which having every day dilated it self in the greatnesses of God renders himself capable with the visits and commerce with Heaven It is time to close the Earth when God opens Heaven and to carry our heart where he is since all our Riches are in him What alas have we to do like Moles to dig the Earth and therein to hide our Treasure surely he deserves to be everlasting poor who cannot be content with a God so rich as he is Canst thou love a little shining Earth Canst thou love a walking piece of Clay before that God that Christ that Glory which is unmeasurably lovely Canst thou love the World thy Friends thy Kindred whose love cannot advantage thee whose weeping cannot ease thee in the time of thy trouble and canst thou not love thy Saviour vvhose Tears and Blood have a healing virtue and are like Balsome and waters of life to thy fainting heart Oh my Soul what incomprehensible love is here If love deserve and should procure love oughtest thou not here to poure out all the store of thy affections shall he not be first served shall he not have the strength of thy love who parted vvith strength and life in love to thee Oh that thy love were more Oh that thy affections were a thousand times greater Alas vvhat vvantest thou to provoke thy love is not here a Sea of love before thee little dost thou
know ah little indeed the glory and blessedness of this love little dost thou know the excellency of this Love Is there any thing here below but baseness in espect of thy enjoyments above are the heavy sufferings the unsatisfying vanities of this world really sutable to thy desires or canst thou find any place more sutable to thy misery then that of mercy or of nearer interest or Relation then that of Heaven Come away then O my Soul stop thine ears to the ignorant language of the world what is the Beauty the Riches the Honours thou hast so much admired Canst thou but even close thine eyes and thou wilt think it all darkness and deformity What is the beauty thou hast so much admired alas when the night comes it will be nothing to thee whilst thou hast gazed on it it hath withered away doâ—h not the wrinkles of consuming sickness or of age or some other deformity make it as loathsome as it was once delightful Ah then O miserable man that thou art unworthy Soul how canst thou love a skinful of dirt and canst no more love the heavenly Glory art thou not a Soul is not heaven the onely lovely Object art thou not a Spirit and is not Earth a Dungeon to Celestial Glory shall Gold or Greatness or worldly Pomp be thy Idols vvhich are all dirt and dung to Christ come forth then O my dull and drowsie Soul thou hast lain long enough in these earthly Cells where cares have been thy Fetters where sorrows have been thy lodgings and Satan thy Jaylor The Soul calling to mind the infinite Love of her Saviour bewailes her ungratefulness and the coldness of her returns WHen holy David considered the vvorks of Gods hands the Sun and the Moou which he had made Psal 8.3 4. he immediately breaks forth into thoughts of humility touching the frail and sad estate of man But blessed Lord what can we say for our great neglect of that Love which hath stretched it self for us even to the death of the Cross and what stupidity is it to forget that that bloody Banquet which was to us the source of life should bring with it the Edict of death O poor Sinner What hast thou done look upon a Deed that vvas worthy of none but thy cruelty stretch out thy hands put thy fingers into those wounds vvhich thou hast made bedew thy hands like unbelieving Thomas in that sacred stream vvhich flowed from thy Saviours side Drink miserable vvretch of that River vvhich there thou seest glide to quench thy thirst Look and behold those dead eyes which accuse thy nakedness and which thou still dost wound with the aspect of thy wickedness alas they are not shut so much by the necessity of death as by the horrour of thy Luxury Behold the great temper of thy Saviours Soul in his most horrible sufferings what could be invented which he endured not what could be undergon which he met not vvith Oh high effect of an infinite Love vvhich found no belief in senses no perswasion in minds no example in manners nor resemblance in nature It is storied of a Prince vvho being desirous to offer himself to death for the preservation of his Subjects took the habite of a Clown the better to facilitate his death he laid down his Crown and Purple and all the Ensigns of Royalty onely retaining those of Love and lost his life in his Enemies hands But alas this was but a mortal life and in giving it he onely paid that tribute to Nature which at last he must of necessity yield But where have we read that a man glorious by Birth and immortal by condition hath espoused that humility which all the world despiseth that mortality which all must partake of that mercy which none can equalize and for no other occasion then to dye for his friend O dear Jesus thou wert by nature immortal and impregnable against all exterior violences thou took'st not the Body of a Peasant nor a body of Air but a true body of Flesh personally united to the word of God Thou O blessed Saviour consumedst thy body with Travails thou quailedst it with toils thou castedst tottered Rags over thy Purpleâ— thou laid'st our miseries upon thy own shoulders and at last resignedst thy selfe as a Prey to a most dolorous death My God! What a Prodigie is this Thou foundest a way to accord infirmity with Soveraignty Honour with Ignomy Life with Death and Time with Eternity O God of Glory O mild Saviour all this hast thou done it was not possible that sole God should suffer death nor sole Man should vanquish it but God and Man hath overcome it Ought not then thy pains to be as much adored by our wills as they are incomprehensible to our understandings And alas how much ought we to be ashamed since instead of enkindling our Affections with the sacred fires of thy Eternal Love we have sought after prophane fire from the eyes of earthly Beautie and have opened our hearts to Forreign flames Ah ungrateful Soul art thou not afraid to hear those heart-piercing words Cant. 5.6 I opened to my beloved but my beloved had withdrawn himself and was gone my soul failed when I spake I sought him but I could not find him Shall the love of God be so communicative as to stream forth by those two conduit-pipes of Glory and Beauty and art thou not hereupon even confounded to see thy heart so narrow and streightned in the exercise of holiness and good works Oh blessed Saviour thou didst spend thy time in continual pain and labours here on Earth for the redemption of the world Many were the scorns reproaches and miseries thou endurest for us Thou didst even melt and dissolve under the ardors of unspeakable affection and zeal for our salvation and at last exposedst thy self to languors sorrows extasies and the cruel punishment of the Cross and shall ingratitude be all the return thou reapest for such infinite mercy How justly maist thou many many times question with me as thou did once with S. Peter Joh. 21.17 Lovest thon me Thou seemest indeed poor soul to love me But why then dost thou not keepe my Commandements Doth not fond love which ordinarily delights to see what it cannot attain find too much admiration for thy eyes and food for its flame Ah that ever thou shouldst spend so many hours endure so much pain and run so many hazards to seek after an unhappy loathsomness Oh that ever thou shouldst take away thy love from me to place it on Creatures which so little deserve it And why should the faculties of the eye which was ordained for light be thus applyed to darkness Shall that which was Created for the use of Life be the cause of Death Alas what canst thou gain by imbracing thy Lusts O poor deceived Soul what Snares what Traps what Tempests beset thee on all sides O Man miserable wretch drenched in the waters of bitter Tears where alas wilt
in all its dimensions Here it is that our Reason is Eclipsed and we often stray from our chiefest good but there it is that after an admirable Transformation the Soul is wholly absorpt in Felicity And as a small drop of water pouted into the Sea instantly takes the colour and taste there of so the Souls taste is fully inebriated and coloured with the divine Glory O Beauty O Greatness O Goodness Beauty to inhabite in the Idea of God as in a Paradise of Glory and Greatness to have capacity infinite and truly apprehensive of divine Majesty Hence also may we take notice that as there is ever some weakness in humane things which sticketh to the most smiling Felicities and never giveth us wine but with a mixture of dregs so never doth the day of God shine clearly in a Soul which hath too much light of man and sips too deeply in the fading vanities of the world such dayes being seldom without Clouds For O deceitful Riches O fading Beauty O Phantasms of Honour How painful are ye to those that sue for you How Traiterous are ye to those that possess you and dolorous to those that leave you unhappy are those that prize you through error that court you through vanity and obtain you by iniquity How much better is it to put our hands in flames then to lay them on Crowns covered with injustice what will it avail us to have worn Purple when we arrive at the period of Death if we have defiled it with the spots of uncleaness and that we must make an Exchange of all our glory and greatness for a habite of Flames which shall no more wear out then Eternity And who so blind as those who behold not the Diamonds of a Royal Crown to sweat with horrour upon a Head poisoned with Pride and Ambition Who is so weak as sees it not his best course to withdraw from the great conversations of the world from the imbroilment of affairs wherein is so little profit from the Court from specious Offices Preferments and Negotiations from all worldly Ambitions and to cultivate a sweet repose and quiet in the service of Jesus O God of the Patient and Eternal mirrour of Patience may my Soul for ever hover in that Region where thou inhabitest may it speedily arrive to that fortunate Island where divine tranquility dwelleth and where there is an everlasting springof Beauty and Glory may it enter into the Temple and may the continual odours of the Sacrifice of Reconciliation Mercy and Propitiation mount up to thy Throne which thou taughtest us upon Calvary in the bitter and sharp dolours of thy body amidst the sorrow of Heaven the darkness of the Sun the opening of Sepulchres the breaking of Stones the effusion of thy Blood and the desolation of thy Soul And as thy arms Blessed Lord were stretched out upon the Cross so at last receive me into the stretched-out arms of thy mercy The Sin-sick Soul can take no rest until she be further reconciled to her Saviour AS there is never any thing good without the experience of evil so God is often pleased here to afflict his Children the berter to make them relish his comforts And hence is it that as David saith Psal 55.19 The wicked fear not God because they have no changes God sending troubles to his Children in mercy but gives prosperity to the wicked in his wrath And hence it is that while the workers of iniquity do flourish the children of God being heavy loaden with the weight and burden of their sinnes cry out Lay on us O God! any affliction rather then suffer us to prosper in the way that is evil As the little Nightingale which lives innocently by some little seeds of Plants sings sweetly while we see all those Birds of Prey which feed upon the flesh of Beasts send forth a horrid cry And as the poor Turtle ceaseth not to groan having lost her Mate and often beholds her self in the silver streams where in every wave she sees she laments the waving Image of her misfortune yet is far more secure since the memelancholly Object of pitty then those who are more obvious to the eye of the Fowler so a pious Soul though seemingly deprived of her sweet liberty and seeing her self severed from all commerce with Man kind to be banished into a Desert where nothing but Rocks are witnesses of her sufferings is notwithstanding still fastned unto God by Chains not to be dissolved whom she fervently desires to vouchsafe her comfort and to confirm her spirit which was descended into the bottom of the miseries of this world When the poor Soul hath offended her God she can never be friends with her self untill she be reconciled to him and conceive his countenance to be turned again to her If he once but hide himself she looks forward if he be there on the right hand and on the left if she may find him She takes all ocasions of holy Conferences and useth all means with the Spouse to enquire for her Beloved which way he was gone and whether he was turned aside Early and late doth she seek the Lord of her life she takes no rest in traversing the Forrests the Woods the Meadows the Mountains and Floods Cant. 1.3 and 6.3 She seeks him by night whom her Soul loveth she will arise and look about the streets with groans and cryes with sighes and prayers in her Chamber and Closet in Church and Chappel she sends up her vowes to the God of her salvation How powerfully also doth she desire God first bedewing her own eyes to water the barrenness of her Soul what sad complaints being all swoln with Tears doth she pour out What is Heaven turn'd Brass that neither Tears nor sighes can enter Shall there be no more commerce between Heaven and the unhappy Progeny of sinfull Adam Alas O God! saith the forlorn Soul Wilt thou alwayes be hidden from me Shall I never see that face which with one glimpse of splendor can make me eternally happy where am I what do I Alas my soul is in night and darkness and I sadly feel O blessed Saviour that thou art far from me My heart is near sinkingin a sea of sorrow I row strongly but can advance nothing except thou come into my Soul Come then O my most blessed Saviour walk upon this tempestuous Sea of my heart say unto me It is I be not afraid O come speedily and Reign within me to disperse those cares to enlighten my understanding to enflame my will to cure my Infirmities and recover my decayed Senses Many and bitter no doubt are the assaults of Satan all this while within the poor Soul Can God love thee saith he and leave thee thus to my power Why then is all this befaln thee where are all his mercies thou boastest of sure he hath now forsaken and delivered thee into my hand why then shouldst thou wait any longer But still doth the Soul stop her ears
the pleasure of sin and the perpetuity of sinners Torments the easinesse of thy gentle yoak and light burden here below and the weight of thy glory provided for me above since there is no moment O Lord void of thy goodness why should there be any moment void of my praise I know it will not be long until death consume me to the very bones and I shall then possess nothing but what I have done for thee Shall I then live in this world to my self and be still vexed with care how to preserve a miserable life Dear Jesus suffer me not thus to be taught by thy Judgements what I have neglected to learn from thy mercy Time and age will one day wither the blossoms of youth The best of our joyes are but fires of straw or flattering sun-shines which are suddenly either washed away with a shower or banished by Tempests The Sun will at last daver the freshest Roses and Lillies O let not then my thoughts strike sail or my heart do homage to the transitory beauties of this world which will onely ensnare and imprison me in the Fetters of sin least the storms of an evil conscience suddenly arise and trouble the serenity of my delights and the tranquility of my seeming felicity The Soul being sensible of its former Mercies sits weeping under the Cross of her Saviour and resolves to partake with him in his Sufferings AS Humility is seldome planted upon Crowns and Scepters so the wisdom of State seldome joyns with that of the Cross where its lustre is too often darkned by the too much glittering of the world and ordinarily finds slippery footing amongst the Rubies and Diamonds of a Crown It was the saying of Tertullian who flourished two hundred years after the Nativity of our Saviour when there had been no speech of any Emperours that had embraced Christianity Tertul. in Apol. That if the Caesars would become Christians they would cease to be Caesars and if the Christians would become Caesars they would cease to be Christians conceiving that poorness of spirit cannot consist with so high and stately Riches neither Humility with a Soveraign Empire or the Tears of Repentance with the vain delights of the Court. Surely the hungring and thirsting after Righteousness upon which our Saviour so often leaves his blessing can no way stand with the desire of Pomp and Greatness in the world no more then Peace can subsist with Licentiousness of War or pureness of heart with the conversing with most pleasing and tempting Beauties or the fairest hopes of the world which are mowed dow in their flower by the pittiless Sythe of death Peter was never so near his ruine as when he was warming himself in the Priests Hall John Baptist was far more secure amongst Wolves Foxes and Tigers then among the wicked Courtiers of Herod He was more happy with his little Dinner of Locusts and wild Honey retired in his Cabin then amidst the Pomps and Pleasures of the King of Galilee Do we know whether our Fancy will run when Ambition rides it or our Minds sail when distempers steer them What makes a Hermit at the Court a solitary man in a Tumult a David in his Tower of Pleasures a Solomon in the midst of so many Wives and Concubines and a Sampson under the enticing hands of his treacherous Dalelah Yea what makes a sacred man amongst the prophane or a Saint in the house of a Tyrant So hard is it also for Carnal eyes to behold the bitter Agony of our blessed Saviour so hard is it for any Tongue without being steeped in Gall to express his sufferings or for any person without pouring out of Tears to approach his Cross What eyes can look on thee as they should and behold all thy flesh wholly imprinted with dolours and thy heart drenched in acerbities What eyes can without bitter relenting behold thy deadly sweat of blood can see thee dragg'd through the streets of Hierusalem every one looking out at the windows to fill their eyes with gazing and astonishment can see thee buffeted flouted tossed from one Tribunal to another spit on every where despised and maliciously affronted What eyes can look on thy spread Arms thy nailed Hands and Feet thy rack't sinews thy pierced side thy bended Neck thy faln looks thy torn Body thy pale and bloodless flesh thy company to be of infamous Theeves and thy miserable Favourite and forlorn Mother ready through grief to expire their last breath what ears could with patience hear thy doleful out-cryes to Heaven and what heart could apprehend thee at first received into a wretched Stable and there laid in a Manger and at last to conclude thy innocent life in so great nakedness as that thou hadst no other veil to cover thee then the blood which gushed from thy wounds Behold O my Soul the whole life of thy Saviour which he passed here on Earth and thou shalt find it a School of Christian manners by the contemplation whereof Holiness is perfected in the fear of the Lord 2 Cor. 7.1 The world loved Riches but he would be poor The world loved Honours but he shun'd and refused a Kingdom and the Treasures thereof the world delighted in a carnal off-spring but he desired neither Marriage not Issue The world feared nothing more then disgrace desertion of friends insulting of enemies bodily Tortures and Death whereas Christ endured the rebukings of the people the flight of his Disciples the mockings of the Souldiers the spitting of the Jews and the death of the Cross O vvonderful that the mighty power of the Divinity would thus manifest it self in the infirmity of the Cross Sure it was onely for God to perform this great Design and thus ascend up to his Throne of Glory by the basest disgraces of the world and if vve vvill be his Children vve must make it appear by participation of his Cross and by suffering Tribulation By this Sun it is that the Eagles are discovered The good Thief saw no other Title or sign of his Kingdom but onely his body covered over vvith bloud and oppressed with dolours by that Book of the Gross he learned all the Glory of Paradise and apprehended that none but God could vvith such patience endure so great Torments Methinks blessed Saviour I hear devout Simon seeing thee heavy loaden with the burden of the Cross thus expostulating with thee O Jesus vvhether goest thou with the extream vveight of this barren piece of Wood whether dost thou carry it and why vvhere do you mean to set it What upon mount Calvary Alas that place is most wild and stony How canst thou plant it there who shall water it to which thou answerest I bear indeed a piece of Wood upon my Shoulders and carry it to mount Calvary This Wood I bear must bear me to bear the salvation of the world and to draw all after me I bear it to place it by my death and water it with my blood Oh Love