Selected quad for the lemma: friend_n

Word A	Word B	Word C	Word D	Occurrence	Frequency Band	MI	MI Band	Prominent
friend_n	david_n	jonathan_n	saul_n	1,059	5	10.1589	5	true

Text snippets containing the quad

ID	Title	Author	Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication)	STC	Words	Pages
A29240	Times treasury, or, Academy for gentry laying downe excellent grounds, both divine and humane, in relation to sexes of both kindes : for their accomplishment in arguments of discourse, habit, fashion and happy progresse in their spirituall conversation : revised, corrected and inlarged with A ladies love-lecture : and a supplement entituled The turtles triumph : summing up all in an exquisite Character of honour / by R. Brathwait, Esq.	Brathwaite, Richard, 1588?-1673.	1652 (1652)	Wing B4276; ESTC R28531	608,024	537

not Those things therefore which are to bee concealed let us conceale them Vt curia Martis Athenis as close as either silence or darknesse will afford us meanes to keepe them both from eye and eare for the better effecting whereof there is necessarily required in every one a wise distrust and slownesse of beleefe wherewith the brest must so equally bee ballasted that hee may suddenly runne on without suffering shipwracke in such a doubtfull and dangerous course It hath beene ever held a singular argument of policy to have an open face but a shut heart to give entertainment with a free and affable countenance but with a wise and discreet reservancy of our counsels to prevent the occasion of giving our friend power over us Yea but it may be objected It may sometimes fall out that a friend cannot performe the office of a friend but by discovering the secret purpose or practice of another For how could faithfull Ionathan advertise David of Sauls wicked purpose against him but by discovering what Saul in secret had imparted to him How could he I say have advertised David of his fathers fury by shooting three arrowes but by discovering what his father had secretly intended against him To which objection it may be thus answered That as amongst evill men there can be no true friendship continued so neither are the Secrets of such men tending ever to mischiefe and effusion of innocent bloud to be concealed but by all meanes should be discovered that such tragicall issues might be prevented Yea but it may be againe objected That admit this were so may wee not impart our griefes to a friend or communicate our counsels to one whom we have made triall of to be trusty and faithfull To which I answer That we may but with this provision that we never unrip our bosome so farre as to give our friend power over us in matters which may either concerne life state or name For though your experience of the trust of such a friend hath beene long and those affaires wherein you have imploied him of serious consequence we have known many Comicall beginnings have a Tragicall Catastrophe many promising mornings turne to duskie after-noones many faire glozing friends recoile like the Bat in the fable and become either neuters or profest enemies So as it was wisely answered by that learned Sage to one who demanded of him what he thought to bee the hardest thing in the world To keepe counsell quoth he Wee say it is good sleeping in a whole skin but how can our sleepes be quiet our rest from terrours freed when we have lost our liberty by committing our Secrets to others trust Yea but friendship being one soule ruling two hearts or one heart dwelling in two bodies loseth her prerogative if excluded from partaking in her friends griefes or comforts for would you thinke it well that your friends should finde you sad and so leave you sicke without ministring any comfort to you or poore without releeving you Surely you could not choose but thinke such an one commeth to jest rather than to visit or comfort you Now how should he comfort you who is wholly ignorant of the cause of your discomfort or how minister any receits to you when he knowes not what distempers you or how releeve you when hee knowes not of any poverty that hath befallen you Whereto I answer that these are not to be numbred among those Secrets which we hold unfitting to be imparted or discovered by one friend to another for the discovery of these may profit but cannot prejudice us Whereas the disclosing of such secrets as concerne our name may afterwards brand us with infamie or such as concerne our state may bring us to poverty or such as concerne our life may weave our unhappy webbe in a fearefull tragedy Therefore it is good counsell not to give our friend power over us but with a circumspect eye to take heed whom we entertaine as a friend and of what nature those secrets are which we impart to that friend When that unhappy Emperour Commodus had communicated his secret'st thoughts to Martia his best affected Concubine and withall how his purpose was before many daies were ended to dispatch Latus and Electus two of his Senators Shee perceiving how the world went and that the Emperour was no lesse inconstant in his love than illimited in his lust discovered to the Senators what the Prince had intended against them which to prevent with one consent they resolved to dispatch the Emperour and so rid them of all occasion of feare Farre more hatefull was that act of Bessus and Nabarzanes in discovering the counsels of their vnfortunate Prince Darius which discovery though it deposed their Prince of Crowne and deprived him of life rewarded those disloyall Traitors with a deserved end Should we but take a view of the doublenesse and deceitfulnesse of friends whose only aimes are for most part to take advantage of our o●pennesse we should find though there bee some Hushai's or faithfull friends so there be some false brethren who secretly under pretence of amity will labour to undermine us For if wee bee great wee shall have some to ply our veine soothing us with the height of our place the eminence of our state our easie accesse to a higher step if wee will take hold of occasion and with these are yong-men whose unripened judgements never attained to the discovery of persons chiefly pleased to these are their secret'st thoughts ever imparted on these are they wholly planted and in these is their principall trust reposed yet loe they trust in broken staves of reed on which if they leane they will goe thorow their hand and pierce it Againe are wee rising to greatnesse and in the first Spring of promotion Wee shall find these chattering Swallows ever flying about us pertending friendship and secrecie in our counsels but misery attends us if wee entertaine them To be briefe are we rich If wee have discovered any Secret to them which may prejudice us being revealed wee shall be sure to have that Secret vented if our hollow counsellour be not rewarded Are wee poore though our state need not feare undoing our secrets must be discovered if the meanest may be gratified by the discovery Thus no Ranke may be exempted no degree freed from prejudice where counsels are disclosed Indeed sometimes it hapneth that a friend discovers the secrets of a friend because out of the justnesse of himselfe and the integrity of his owne conscience which no respect will suffer him to violate hee cannot endure the sinister or indirect practice of his friend and therefore discovers it to give meanes of prevention to the innocent Which may be instanced in the vicount of Melin his confession who lying upon his death-bed here in England disclosed the purpose of King Lewis his Master to the chiefe Peeres and Barons of the Realme who considering the inevitable danger into

were our Northerne Borderers who have beene alwayes uncertaine friends in extremities and assured enemies upon advantage Of which it may be said as was spoken of the Philosophers cloake Pallium video Philosophum non video I see the cover of a friend but no friend For as nothing is more hatefull then a doubtfull and uncertaine man who now draweth his foot backe and now putteth it forward so there is nothing more distastefull to any man then these faire protesting friends whose hollow and undermining hearts make a shew of faire weather abroad when there is a tempest at home comming towards you with their feet but going from you with their hearts In briefe they are Danaus tubs or running sieves that can hold no water leave them therefore to themselves if you desire in safety to enjoy your selves Now to the end I may acquaint you likewise with the rest of such Motives to Love as are powerfully working in the affection of the mind as wee have touched the first Motive or inducement to Love to wit Parentage or descent which cannot so farre degenerate from it selfe but it must of necessity shew it selfe so it attracts other motives of love unto it as Benevolence in rewarding excellency or admiration proceeding from the fame of such redoubted Hero's as have their names charact'red and engraven in leaves of brasse to preserve their memory As Solomon for his Wisdome whom no doubt Nicaula Queene of Saba had a desire to see and bee knowne to through report of his wisdome so as her long journey seemed short having understood that to be true with her owne eare which shee had onely heard of before by report How much likewise was David affected for his Valour in discomfiting the uncircumcised Philistin So was Alexander whose report brought the Amazon Thalestris from her owne Countrey of purpose to be knowne to so invincible a spirit So Hercules Achilles Dardanus Diomedes Scipio Hannibal Constantine c. whose exploits purchased them Love to such as were never acquainted with their persons Pardoning likewise of injuries is an excellent motive of Love When Chyle's brother was angry that himselfe was not made Ephorus as well as hee O quoth hee I know how to suffer injuries so doest not thou Though Diogenes the Cynicke answered uncivilly to Alexander when he came to his poor Mansion in Synope his Philosophers Barrell yet hee replyed unto his Satyricall speech with no indignation but said to such of his attendants as derided the boarish and exoticke speech of Diogenes If I were not Alexander I would wish to be Diogenes The like instance may be confirmed by holy Writ where Miriam for murmuring against Moses was stricken with a loathsome Leprosie hee could not suffer this condigne punishment to be inflicted on her but demanded of God that hee would cure her Another motive to Love is Hatred where an ill occasion procureth among enemies a reconciliation Herod and Pilate enemies before were reconciled in combining their powers together against Christ. Mastives if set together will fight till death but in the presence of a Bull will joyne together Sometimes mutuall affliction procureth mutuall affection Such resorted to David as were persecuted by Saul being such as were amaro animo Where Sauls enmity brought David to a triall of Hushai's faithfull amity where hee found the words of Ecclesiasticus to be true A faithfull friend is a strong defence and hee that findeth such a one findeth a treasure For when wee are in the greatest straights such an one sheweth the most strength So as the Apostles words may be verified strength is made perfect in weakenesse Where one afflicted friend supporteth another by joyning their strenghts together Another motive there is proceeding from some especiall delivery from danger for who will not esteeme him for a friend who will expose himselfe to danger to deliver his friend Iudith entred Bethulia with Holofernes head and by that meanes preserved her Countrey from ruine and desolation Esther procured the death of Haman repealed those severe and cruell lawes enacted proclaimed and even ready to be executed by Hamans suggestions in the kingdome of the Medes and Persians whereby shee purchased eternall honour love and memory in her Countrey The same love gained Moses for delivering the Israelites from the thraldome of Egypt The like may be said of Iosua Sampson Macchabeus and many others frequent in holy Writ The Romans so highly honoured and affected such as protected their Countrey and defended her Liberty as they bestowed no lesse style on them then Patres Patriae Another motive there is drawing one Enemy to love another induced thereto in respect of Compassion or some other princely vertue which he seeth in him When Saul understood that David might have taken away his life and would not Levavit vocem flevit his threats were changed into teares and his passion into a teare-swolne admiration to see his foe so full of compassion Wee are induced likewise to love them that tell and confesse sincerely their offences for an ingenuous acknowledgement of what is done moves us to commiserate his case by whom it is done yea quencheth all hate as if a small sparke were drenched in the Sea Likewise in the toleration of wrongs wee are enforced to love him who suffereth them and having power to revenge will not out of the noblenesse of his spirit doe what hee may To conclude Bountie is a motive to Love for giving gifts gathereth friends which Bountie is most worthy acceptance when done with cheerefulnesse Hilarem datorem diligit Deus Thus have we traced over such Motives as generally induce or procure Love Friendship or Acquaintance wherein observe the lesson of the Sonne of Sirach Depart from thine enemies and beware of thy friends for some man is a friend for his owne occasion and will not abide in the day of thy trouble Now if you would understand how a man may know a friend you shall find him described and by certaine infallible markes discovered in the twelfth Chapter of the same book But alwayes Beware saith he of deceitfull friends lest feeling the bitternesse of them you find the saying of the Prophet true All the men of thy confederacie have driven thee to the borders the men that were at peace with thee have deceived thee and prevailed against thee they that cat thy bread have laid a wound under thee there is none understanding in him Make choice then of him for your Acquaintance whom you may worthily esteeme of as a second-selfe so may you communicate your counsels freely acquaint him with your griefes friendly and share in comforts and afflictions fully Thus much for the choice of Acquaintance wherein I have the rather enlarged my discourse because I know that as there is nothing more usefull to direction or instruction then where good ones are elected so there is nothing more hurtfull in the maine matter of discipline