full_o equal_a to_o both_o 6._o he_o believe_v in_o one_o nature_n three_o person_n and_o in_o one_o person_n two_o nature_n 7._o he_o believe_v a_o virgin_n to_o have_v be_v a_o mother_n and_o her_o son_n to_o be_v her_o maker_n 8._o he_o believe_v he_o to_o be_v bear_v in_o time_n who_o be_v from_o everlasting_a and_o he_o to_o be_v shut_v up_o in_o a_o narrow_a room_n who_o heaven_n and_o earth_n can_v never_o contain_v 9_o he_o believe_v he_o to_o have_v be_v a_o weak_a child_n carry_v in_o arm_n who_o be_v the_o almighty_a and_o he_o to_o have_v die_v who_o only_o have_v life_n and_o immortality_n in_o himself_o 10._o he_o believe_v the_o god_n of_o all_o grace_n to_o have_v be_v angry_a with_o one_o who_o never_o offend_v he_o and_o the_o god_n that_o hate_v all_o sin_n to_o be_v reconcile_v to_o himself_o though_o sin_v con-continual_o and_o never_o make_v or_o be_v able_a to_o make_v he_o satisfaction_n 11._o he_o believe_v the_o most_o just_a god_n to_o have_v punish_v a_o most_o innocent_a person_n and_o to_o have_v justify_v himself_o though_o a_o most_o ungodly_a sinner_n 12._o he_o believe_v himself_o free_o pardon_v and_o yet_o that_o a_o sufficient_a satisfaction_n be_v pay_v for_o he_o 13._o he_o believe_v himself_o to_o be_v precious_a in_o god_n sight_n yet_o he_o loathe_v himself_o in_o his_o own_o sight_n 14._o he_o dare_v not_o justify_v himself_o even_o in_o those_o thing_n wherein_o he_o know_v no_o fault_n in_o himself_o yet_o he_o believe_v god_n accept_v even_o those_o service_n wherein_o himself_o be_v able_a to_o find_v many_o fault_n 15._o he_o praise_v god_n for_o his_o justice_n and_o fear_v he_o for_o his_o mercy_n 16._o he_o be_v so_o ashamed_a as_o he_o dare_v not_o open_a his_o mouth_n before_o god_n yet_o come_v with_o boldness_n to_o god_n and_o ask_v any_o thing_n he_o needs_o 17._o he_o be_v so_o humble_a as_o to_o acknowledge_v himself_o to_o deserve_v nothing_o but_o evil_a yet_o so_o confident_a as_o to_o believe_v god_n mean_v he_o all_o good_a 18._o he_o be_v one_o that_o fear_v always_o and_o yet_o be_v bold_a as_o a_o lion_n 19_o he_o be_v often_o sorrowful_a yet_o always_o rejoice_v often_o complain_v yet_o always_o give_v of_o thanks_o 20._o he_o be_v most_o low_o mind_v yet_o the_o great_a aspirer_n most_o content_v yet_o ever_o crave_v 21._o he_o bear_v a_o lofty_a spirit_n in_o a_o mean_a condition_n and_o when_o he_o be_v aloft_o think_v mean_o of_o himself_o 22._o he_o be_v rich_a in_o poverty_n and_o poor_a in_o the_o midst_n of_o riches_n 23._o he_o believe_v all_o the_o world_n to_o be_v his_o yet_o dare_v take_v nothing_o without_o special_a leave_n 24._o he_o covenant_n with_o god_n for_o nothing_o yet_o look_v for_o the_o great_a reward_n 25._o he_o lose_v his_o life_n and_o gain_n by_o it_o and_o even_o while_o he_o lose_v it_o he_o save_v it_o 26._o he_o live_v not_o to_o himself_o yet_o of_o all_o other_o be_v most_o wise_a for_o himself_o 27._o he_o deny_v himself_o often_o yet_o no_o man_n that_o most_o please_v himself_o love_v himself_o so_o well_o 28._o he_o be_v the_o most_o reproach_v and_o most_o honour_a 29._o he_o have_v the_o most_o affliction_n and_o the_o most_o comfort_n 30._o the_o more_o injury_n his_o enemy_n do_v to_o he_o the_o more_o advantage_n he_o get_v by_o they_o 31._o the_o more_o he_o himself_o forsake_v of_o worldly_a thing_n the_o more_o he_o enjoy_v of_o they_o 32._o he_o be_v most_o temperate_a of_o all_o man_n yet_o fare_v most_o delicious_o 33._o he_o lend_v and_o give_v most_o free_o yet_o be_v the_o great_a usurer_n 34._o he_o be_v meek_a towards_o all_o man_n yet_o inexorable_a by_o man_n 35._o he_o be_v the_o best_a child_n brother_n husband_n friend_n yet_o hate_v father_n and_o mother_n and_o wife_n and_o brethren_n etc._n etc._n 36._o he_o love_v all_o man_n as_o himself_o yet_o hate_v some_o man_n with_o perfect_a hatred_n 37._o he_o desire_v to_o have_v more_o grace_n than_o any_o have_v in_o the_o world_n yet_o he_o be_v true_o sorry_a when_o he_o see_v any_o man_n have_v less_o than_o himself_o 38._o he_o know_v no_o man_n after_o the_o flesh_n yet_o give_v to_o all_o man_n their_o due_a respect_n 39_o he_o know_v if_o he_o please_v man_n he_o be_v not_o the_o servant_n of_o christ_n yet_o for_o christ_n sake_n he_o please_v all_o man_n in_o all_o thing_n 40._o he_o be_v a_o peacemaker_n yet_o continual_o fight_v &_o a_o irreconcilable_a enemy_n 41._o he_o believe_v he_o to_o be_v worse_o than_o a_o infidel_n that_o provide_v not_o for_o his_o family_n yet_o he_o himself_o live_v and_o die_v without_o care_n 42._o he_o be_v severe_a to_o his_o child_n because_o he_o love_v they_o and_o be_v favourable_a to_o his_o enemy_n revenge_n himself_o upon_o they_o 43._o he_o account_v all_o his_o inferior_n his_o fellow_n yet_o stand_v strict_o upon_o his_o authority_n 44._o he_o believe_v the_o angel_n to_o be_v more_o excellent_a creature_n than_o himself_o and_o yet_o count_v they_o his_o servant_n 45._o he_o believe_v he_o receive_v many_o good_a turn_n by_o their_o mean_n yet_o he_o never_o pray_v their_o assistance_n nor_o crave_v their_o prayer_n nor_o offer_v they_o thanks_o which_o yet_o he_o do_v not_o disdain_v to_o do_v to_o the_o mean_a christian_n 46._o he_o believe_v himself_o a_o king_n how_o mean_a soever_o he_o be_v and_o how_o great_a soever_o he_o be_v that_o he_o be_v not_o too_o good_a to_o be_v servant_n to_o the_o poor_a saint_n 47._o he_o be_v often_o in_o prison_n yet_o always_o at_o liberty_n and_o a_o freeman_n though_o a_o servant_n 48._o he_o receive_v not_o honour_n from_o man_n yet_o high_o prize_v a_o good_a name_n 49._o he_o believe_v god_n have_v bid_v every_a man_n that_o do_v he_o any_o good_a to_o do_v so_o yet_o he_o of_o any_o man_n be_v the_o most_o thankful_a to_o they_o that_o do_v aught_o for_o he_o 50._o he_o will_v lay_v down_o his_o life_n to_o save_v the_o soul_n of_o his_o enemy_n yet_o will_v not_o venture_v upon_o one_o sin_n to_o save_v his_o life_n that_o have_v save_v he_o 51._o he_o swear_v to_o his_o own_o hindrance_n and_o change_v not_o yet_o know_v that_o his_o mouth_n can_v tie_v he_o to_o sin_n 52._o he_o believe_v christ_n to_o have_v no_o need_n of_o any_o thing_n he_o do_v yet_o make_v account_n he_o relieve_v christ_n in_o all_o his_o deed_n of_o charity_n 53._o he_o know_v he_o can_v do_v nothing_o of_o himself_o yet_o labour_v to_o work_v out_o his_o own_o salvation_n 54._o he_o confess_v he_o can_v do_v nothing_o yet_o as_o true_o profess_v he_o can_v do_v all_o thing_n 55._o he_o know_v that_o flesh_n and_o blood_n shall_v not_o inherit_v the_o kingdom_n of_o god_n yet_o believe_v he_o shall_v go_v to_o heaven_n body_n and_o soul_n 56._o he_o tremble_v at_o god_n word_n yet_o count_v it_o sweet_a to_o he_o than_o the_o honey_n and_o the_o honey_n comb_n and_o dear_a than_o thousand_o of_o gold_n and_o silver_n 57_o he_o believe_v that_o god_n will_v never_o damn_v he_o and_o yet_o he_o fear_v he_o for_o be_v able_a to_o cast_v he_o into_o hell_n 58._o he_o know_v he_o shall_v not_o be_v save_v by_o his_o work_n and_o yet_o do_v all_o the_o good_a work_n he_o can_v and_o believe_v he_o shall_v not_o be_v save_v without_o they_o 59_o he_o know_v god_n providence_n order_v all_o thing_n yet_o be_v he_o so_o diligent_a in_o his_o business_n as_o if_o he_o be_v to_o cut_v out_o his_o own_o fortune_n 60._o he_o believe_v beforehand_o god_n have_v purpose_v what_o shall_v be_v and_o that_o nothing_o can_v make_v he_o alter_v his_o purpose_n yet_o pray_v and_o endeavour_n as_o if_o he_o will_v force_v god_n to_o satisfy_v he_o however_o 61._o he_o pray_v and_o labour_v for_o what_o he_o believe_v god_n mean_v to_o give_v he_o and_o the_o more_o assure_v he_o be_v the_o more_o earnest_a 62._o he_o pray_v for_o that_o he_o know_v he_o shall_v not_o obtain_v and_o yet_o give_v not_o over_o 63._o he_o pray_v and_o labour_v for_o that_o which_o he_o know_v he_o may_v be_v no_o less_o happy_a without_o 64._o he_o pray_v with_o all_o his_o heart_n not_o to_o be_v lead_v into_o temptation_n yet_o rejoice_v when_o he_o be_v fall_v into_o it_o 65._o he_o believe_v his_o prayer_n to_o be_v hear_v even_o when_o they_o be_v deny_v and_o give_v thanks_o for_o that_o which_o he_o pray_v against_o 66._o he_o have_v within_o he_o the_o flesh_n and_o the_o spirit_n yet_o be_v not_o a_o double-minded_n man_n 67._o he_o be_v often_o lead_v away_o captive_a by_o the_o law_n of_o sin_n yet_o it_o never_o get_v the_o dominion_n over_o he_o 68_o he_o can_v sin_v yet_o he_o can_v
commandment_n and_o live_v and_o my_o law_n as_o the_o apple_n of_o thy_o eye_n which_o sentence_n by_o god_n blessing_n have_v occasion_v this_o whole_a meditation_n whatever_o it_o be_v the_o apple_n of_o the_o eye_n be_v the_o tender_a thing_n in_o the_o world_n of_o natural_a thing_n the_o law_n of_o god_n no_o less_o infinite_o more_o in_o spirittual_n as_o i_o therefore_o like_v not_o the_o word_n infinite_a but_o when_o we_o speak_v of_o god_n so_o those_o forename_a phrase_n seem_v to_o be_v god_n peculiar_a and_o that_o one_o main_a cause_n why_o common_a man_n so_o ready_o say_v they_o love_n god_n with_o all_o their_o heart_n i_o mean_v why_o they_o so_o easy_o deceive_v themselves_o in_o so_o say_v be_v because_o they_o have_v adulterate_v the_o phrase_n with_o all_o my_o heart_n and_o prostitute_v to_o every_o base_a trifle_n say_v if_o it_o be_v not_o so_o and_o then_o as_o saint_n james_n blame_v for_o not_o say_v if_o the_o lord_n will_v etc._n etc._n though_v every_o one_o will_v grant_v such_o word_n necessary_a and_o pretend_v to_o suppose_v they_o so_o be_v it_o not_o blame-worthy_a to_o say_v in_o petty_a matter_n what_o shall_v make_v a_o sacred_a sound_n in_o our_o ear_n and_o to_o our_o spirit_n 6._o i_o wish_v i_o can_v loose_v myself_o in_o a_o holy_a trance_n of_o meditation_n every_o time_n i_o think_v of_o god_n and_o christ_n as_o the_o author_n fountain_n life_n substance_n of_o all_o my_o happiness_n all-sufficient_a alone_o sufficient_a only-sufficient_a for_o my_o soul_n and_o all_o comfort_n and_o good_a nothing_o want_v in_o god_n and_o christ_n to_o eternity_n no_o need_n of_o any_o creature_n no_o accession_n by_o any_o creature_n no_o one_o creature_n not_o all_o of_o they_o comparable_a to_o he_o or_o any_o thing_n without_o he_o time_n lose_v happiness_n lose_v while_o converse_n with_o any_o creature_n further_o than_o according_a to_o his_o ordinance_n as_o his_o instrument_n and_o servant_n 7._o i_o wish_v i_o can_v forget_v all_o respct_n to_o myself_o carnal_a natural_a while_o i_o have_v any_o service_n to_o perform_v to_o god_n as_o i_o have_v every_o moment_n tho_o i_o can_v ever_o think_v so_o that_o i_o may_v show_v i_o love_v god_n with_o strength_n my_o god_n with_o all_o my_o strength_n and_o never_o be_v weary_a of_o his_o immediate_a service_n especial_o or_o if_o natural_o yet_o not_o spiritual_o lust_n be_v vigorous_a when_o the_o body_n languish_v be_v spend_v oh_o why_o be_v not_o grace_n more_o strong_a 8._o i_o wish_v my_o heart_n may_v never_o recoil_v upon_o i_o with_o say_v thou_o may_v now_o or_o such_o a_o time_n have_v do_v thy_o god_n thy_o saviour_n more_o service_n than_o thou_o do_v even_o when_o thou_o do_v somewhat_o thy_o body_n and_o spirit_n will_v have_v hold_v out_o long_a time_n and_o endure_v a_o geat_a stress_n of_o zeal_n and_o much_o less_o thou_o do_v whole_o lose_v such_o a_o opportunity_n of_o do_v or_o receive_v good_a though_o scarce_o can_v any_o one_o do_v good_a who_o receive_v not_o some_o present_a payment_n at_o least_o in_o soul_n the_o enlargement_n of_o grace_n and_o holy_a affection_n and_o lest_o of_o all_o thou_o do_v whole_o employ_v thy_o strength_n to_o sin_n or_o thou_o have_v weaken_v thy_o strength_n by_o intemperance_n or_o any_o other_o foolish_a or_o sinful_a practice_n 9_o i_o wish_v that_o every_o day_n among_o my_o first_o thought_n one_o may_v be_v what_o special_a business_n have_v i_o within_o door_n within_o my_o soul_n what_o sin_n to_o mortify_v whether_o late_o rage_v and_o even_o but_o last_o day_n or_o night_n prevail_v over_o i_o or_o which_o i_o have_v have_v at_o least_o some_o late_a victory_n over_o that_o i_o may_v allot_v time_n to_o pursue_v it_o and_o by_o no_o mean_n forget_v it_o in_o my_o paryer_n and_o arm_v myself_o against_o the_o encounter_n if_o there_o be_v any_o possibility_n of_o my_o be_v assault_v that_o day_n and_o what_o grace_n to_o strengthen_v wherein_o i_o have_v be_v exceed_o feeble_a of_o late_a or_o even_o begin_v to_o obtain_v some_o vigour_n which_o it_o may_v easy_o be_v lose_v and_o will_v be_v if_o not_o with_o all_o care_n and_o mean_n and_o prayer_n foment_v and_o cherish_v that_o so_o i_o may_v prepare_v for_o it_o these_o be_v a_o christian_n main_a business_n within_o himself_o always_o withal_o i_o wish_v to_o die_v daily_o i_o mean_v not_o that_o i_o daily_o wish_v for_o death_n but_o that_o i_o may_v foresee_v it_o more_o than_o possible_a and_o may_v prepare_v for_o it_o resolve_o content_o that_o i_o may_v look_v at_o it_o as_o at_o a_o mean_n of_o happiness_n and_o take_v such_o order_n as_o it_o may_v not_o cut_v i_o off_o from_o any_o main_a necessary_a employment_n but_o each_o hour_n and_o minute_n to_o dispatch_v the_o substantial_o of_o my_o business_n and_o refer_v circumstance_n and_o event_n to_o the_o alwise_a powerful_a and_o gracious_a providence_n of_o the_o great_a ruler_n and_o king_n of_o the_o whole_a world_n and_o of_o every_o creature_n 11._o i_o wish_v to_o improve_v every_o relation_n i_o stand_v in_o towards_o any_o of_o mankind_n to_o the_o advancement_n of_o religion_n that_o glory_n may_v redound_v to_o christ_n by_o my_o be_v a_o child_n to_o one_o a_o brother_n to_o another_o a_o neighbour_n to_o a_o three_o a_o kinsman_n a_o friend_n a_o acquaintance_n to_o any_o one_o that_o as_o well_o for_o the_o credit_n of_o religion_n which_o command_v to_o give_v to_o all_o their_o due_a honour_n and_o to_o love_v they_o as_o myself_o as_o for_o the_o propagation_n of_o religion_n i_o may_v be_v ambitious_a to_o approve_v myself_o the_o best_a child_n or_o subject_a or_o friend_n etc._n etc._n in_o the_o world_n i_o and_o careful_a also_o to_o insinuate_v myself_o as_o much_o as_o may_v be_v into_o the_o favour_n of_o every_o one_o i_o converse_v withal_o in_o the_o world_n of_o superior_n by_o submission_n and_o diligence_n of_o equal_n by_o courtesy_n and_o freedom_n of_o inferior_n by_o affibility_n mix_v with_o gravity_n and_o gentleness_n with_o necessary_a strictness_n and_o that_o i_o may_v not_o fail_v to_o entitle_v god_n to_o whatever_o ground_n i_o gain_v upon_o the_o affection_n of_o any_o that_o be_v to_o engage_v they_o thereby_o the_o more_o forward_o in_o his_o service_n in_o their_o own_o person_n and_o towards_o all_o other_o and_o that_o i_o myself_o also_o may_v reap_v some_o spiritual_a benefit_n by_o they_o that_o so_o i_o may_v bless_v god_n for_o they_o and_o they_o he_o for_o i_o and_o other_o for_o they_o and_o i_o together_o 12._o particular_o i_o wish_v that_o towards_o inferior_n i_o may_v never_o put_v less_o but_o rather_o more_o weight_n upon_o god_n comandement_n than_o i_o own_o and_o upon_o religious_a than_o civil_a observance_n and_o that_o because_o the_o best_a be_v not_o angel_n i_o may_v bear_v with_o more_o patience_n fail_n in_o mere_a worldly_a than_o spiritual_a matter_n 13._o i_o wish_v never_o to_o be_v one_o of_o those_o that_o feed_v themselves_o without_o fear_n but_o that_o whether_o i_o eat_v or_o drink_v i_o may_v do_v all_o to_o the_o glory_n of_o my_o god_n that_o be_v seasonable_o spare_o and_o with_o choice_n for_o health_n and_o strength_n not_o gluttony_n drunkenness_n or_o riotous_a curiosity_n that_o i_o may_v daily_o remember_v my_o business_n not_o to_o be_v to_o live_v to_o eat_v but_o eat_v to_o live_v that_o i_o may_v follow_v my_o business_n that_o be_v christianity_n that_o i_o may_v not_o forget_v how_o slippery_a a_o place_n the_o throat_n be_v and_o how_o easy_o that_o glide_v down_o which_o after_o work_v disease_n that_o because_o the_o crave_n of_o the_o sensual_a appetite_n seem_v but_o reasonable_a be_v but_o for_o one_o self_n be_v of_o the_o betray_n of_o reason_n itself_o beside_o the_o quell_v of_o grace_n both_o grace_n and_o reason_n may_v combine_v together_o in_o the_o practice_n of_o this_o difficult_a piece_n of_o self-denial_n and_o that_o i_o may_v ever_o consider_v not_o only_o what_o a_o shame_n what_o a_o unthankfulness_n it_o be_v in_o the_o least_o degree_n to_o disable_v myself_o for_o the_o service_n of_o he_o who_o allow_v i_o liberal_o so_o much_o as_o can_v be_v fit_a for_o i_o how-much_a soever_o that_o be_v but_o also_o what_o pity_n to_o waste_v good_a creature_n to_o so_o vile_a a_o purpose_n as_o to_o weaken_v my_o body_n or_o overcharge_v my_o spirit_n with_o what_o be_v mean_v to_o strengthen_v and_o quicken_v they_o that_o from_o the_o observation_n of_o the_o untowardness_n of_o my_o mind_n when_o it_o be_v in_o the_o best_a temper_n i_o may_v tremble_v at_o the_o thought_n of_o the_o least_o intemperance_n which_o if_o it_o fetter_v not_o my_o body_n so_o as_o it_o can_v do_v its_o duty_n will_v at_o least_o hamper_v
in_o danger_n to_o starve_v either_o through_o want_n of_o public_a provision_n or_o leisure_n to_o provide_v for_o myself_o what_o may_v be_v have_v and_o therefore_o by_o no_o mean_n to_o overslip_v the_o opportunity_n even_o for_o my_o own_o sake_n beside_o the_o commandment_n and_o to_o take_v to_o the_o utmost_a minute_n that_o i_o can_v my_o spiritual_a liberty_n to_o serve_v god_n and_o get_v grace_n not_o allow_v any_o thing_n by_o my_o good_a will_n to_o interrupt_v i_o therein_o 27._o i_o desire_v to_o account_v the_o sacrament_n of_o the_o lord_n supper_n a_o singular_a fair_a wherein_o the_o bread_n that_o come_v down_o from_o heaven_n the_o water_n of_o life_n spiritual_a wine_n and_o milk_n and_o whatsoever_o else_o be_v nourish_v and_o comfortable_a to_o the_o soul_n be_v free_o offer_v and_o to_o be_v have_v without_o money_n and_o without_o price_n that_o therefore_o i_o may_v be_v sure_a not_o to_o miss_v when_o i_o may_v go_v to_o it_o and_o yet_o because_o all_o that_o come_v thither_o make_v not_o so_o happy_a a_o bargain_n but_o rather_o purchase_v to_o themselves_o wrath_n and_o judgement_n i_o may_v be_v careful_a to_o prepare_v myself_o so_o by_o examination_n that_o my_o soul_n be_v not_o send_v away_o fast_v or_o which_o be_v worse_o poison_a while_o my_o body_n be_v entertain_v 28._o i_o desire_v to_o account_v all_o other_o ordinance_n of_o god_n in_o their_o degree_n and_o manner_n likewise_o the_o mean_n of_o my_o soul_n enrich_v nourish_a physic_n so_o that_o if_o i_o shall_v slight_v or_o trifle_v away_o these_o bless_a opportunity_n i_o can_v not_o but_o die_v a_o beggar_n die_v and_o starve_v die_v a_o miserable_a disease_a leper_n die_v and_o perish_v eternal_o that_o therefore_o i_o may_v not_o be_v so_o much_o a_o fool_n as_o to_o have_v these_o put_v as_o prize_n into_o my_o hand_n to_o get_v wisdom_n withal_o and_o i_o to_o have_v no_o heart_n to_o they_o or_o that_o pretend_v no_o other_o errand_n to_o the_o place_n where_o they_o be_v nor_o other_o business_n at_o that_o time_n but_o to_o receive_v they_o i_o shall_v be_v so_o wicked_o mad_a as_o to_o sleep_v away_o the_o offer_v of_o grace_n then_o tender_v unto_o i_o nor_o suffer_v my_o mind_n to_o be_v divert_v to_o any_o other_o thing_n â—or_a to_o look_v that_o god_n shall_v hear_v i_o where_o i_o scarce_o hear_v myself_o in_o my_o prayer_n or_o refuse_v to_o hear_v he_o in_o his_o word_n 29._o i_o desire_v to_o account_v those_o my_o best_a friend_n that_o most_o help_n i_o in_o my_o business_n of_o christianity_n and_o to_o esteem_v a_o watchful_a consideration_n and_o faithful_a admonition_n the_o most_o necessary_a and_o best_a expression_n of_o friendship_n and_o best_a help_n to_o my_o feeble_a and_o frail_a mind_n 30._o i_o desire_v if_o ever_o i_o marry_v to_o account_v that_o one_o of_o the_o great_a business_n even_o of_o religion_n that_o i_o can_v undertake_v any_o time_n in_o my_o whole_a life_n which_o if_o i_o speed_v well_o in_o will_v incomparable_o beyond_o that_o other_o man_n or_o creature_n can_v advance_v my_o spiritual_a project_n and_o advantage_n and_o contrary_o disappoint_v and_o overthrow_v they_o if_o i_o make_v a_o ill_a match_n that_o therefore_o be_v true_o sensible_a of_o my_o own_o natural_a sinful_a inclination_n which_o may_v betray_v i_o as_o soon_o as_o any_o other_o into_o some_o one_o at_o least_o of_o those_o many_o untoward_a course_n which_o person_n of_o all_o quality_n and_o condition_n usual_o take_v on_o this_o occasion_n as_o also_o apprehensive_a of_o god_n punish_v no_o sin_n more_o frequent_o or_o sharp_o in_o this_o world_n i_o may_v from_o the_o first_o moment_n of_o my_o entertain_v any_o such_o thought_n make_v my_o most_o ardent_a and_o faithful_a prayer_n keep_v pace_n with_o they_o first_o to_o implore_v to_o be_v direct_v in_o a_o perfect_a way_n and_o then_o to_o be_v bless_v with_o a_o true_a helper_n every_o way_n meet_v for_o i_o 31._o particular_o i_o desire_v that_o the_o phrase_n of_o marry_v in_o the_o lord_n and_o not_o be_v unequal_o yoke_v etc._n etc._n not_o corrupt_v by_o the_o world_n false_a gloss_n but_o true_o interpret_v by_o a_o serious_a conscience_n may_v ever_o have_v a_o absolute_a negative_a voice_n in_o all_o proposition_n that_o be_v that_o i_o may_v never_o marry_v with_o any_o who_o i_o have_v reason_n to_o judge_v not_o to_o be_v true_o religious_a while_o yet_o i_o conclude_v that_o religion_n alone_o be_v not_o sufficient_a to_o make_v any_o match_n that_o i_o may_v never_o dare_v to_o cross_v the_o rule_n of_o nature_n in_o too_o much_o disparity_n of_o age_n or_o in_o rob_v parent_n of_o their_o right_n at_o least_o of_o approbation_n and_o consent_n nor_o those_o of_o civility_n by_o aspire_v too_o eminent_o above_o my_o degree_n or_o debase_v myself_o too_o much_o below_o it_o withal_o count_v it_o a_o necessary_a qualification_n in_o one_o who_o i_o may_v match_v myself_o unto_o to_o have_v no_o predominant_a humour_n which_o i_o can_v bear_v but_o to_o be_v able_a to_o bear_v any_o infirmity_n of_o i_o and_o to_o be_v at_o least_o some_o help_n to_o my_o spirit_n in_o those_o thing_n wherein_o i_o special_o need_v help_v 32._o i_o desire_v for_o my_o security_n in_o all_o these_o resolution_n that_o i_o may_v never_o be_v in_o haste_n but_o make_v a_o leisurable_a and_o sufficient_a enquiry_n by_o myself_o and_o friend_n answerable_a to_o the_o necessity_n which_o the_o world_n deceitfulness_n enforce_v in_o a_o business_n of_o such_o last_a importance_n but_o special_o that_o i_o may_v never_o be_v in_o love_n with_o the_o estate_n or_o comeliness_n of_o person_n which_o will_v hinder_v any_o full_a enquiry_n and_o stop_v my_o ear_n to_o any_o though_o never_o so_o true_a a_o information_n and_o blind_a my_o eye_n from_o a_o right_a discern_a whether_o there_o be_v indeed_o that_o which_o in_o other_o i_o be_v wont_a to_o make_v the_o character_n of_o piety_n and_o even_o in_o a_o visible_a observation_n of_o defect_n make_v i_o wicked_o run_v to_o god_n decree_n for_o my_o excuse_n and_o say_v marriage_n be_v make_v in_o heaven_n or_o presumptuous_o promise_v myself_o that_o i_o shall_v make_v they_o better_o when_o once_o marry_v and_o headlong_o run_v on_o notwithstanding_o all_o the_o contrary_a advice_n of_o friend_n or_o even_o the_o command_n of_o parent_n and_o be_v in_o danger_n to_o have_v my_o heart_n break_v with_o discontent_n if_o the_o providence_n of_o god_n shall_v any_o way_n break_v the_o match_n which_o last_o consideration_n forbid_v also_o too_o much_o engagement_n of_o affection_n upon_o the_o most_o worthy_a and_o fit_a person_n in_o the_o world_n while_o there_o remain_v any_o possibility_n of_o dissolve_v the_o treaty_n 33._o i_o desire_v to_o enforce_v the_o undervalue_a of_o wealth_n or_o beauty_n upon_o my_o spirit_n from_o the_o scarecity_n of_o these_o who_o have_v all_o the_o other_o more_o necessary_a qualification_n and_o that_o remember_v among_o all_o the_o end_n of_o marriage_n mention_v in_o scripture_n none_o of_o they_o to_o be_v to_o make_v one_o rich_a i_o may_v never_o consent_v to_o set_v my_o liberty_n my_o comfort_n myself_o for_o so_o long_a a_o term_n as_o during_o life_n to_o make_v never_o so_o great_a a_o purchase_n of_o worldly_a estate_n as_o also_o though_o i_o must_v never_o match_v myself_o to_o any_o till_o i_o can_v love_v their_o person_n i_o may_v yet_o count_v it_o a_o sin_n to_o refuse_v one_o otherwise_o every_o way_n fit_a for_o i_o upon_o the_o mere_a exception_n that_o i_o can_v love_v when_o there_o be_v no_o remarkable_a deformity_n to_o breed_v a_o loathe_n and_o to_o reckon_v it_o a_o duty_n to_o pray_v earnest_o to_o god_n to_o rectify_v such_o untowardness_n of_o my_o mind_n as_o make_v i_o without_o just_a cause_n reject_v a_o gracious_a offer_n of_o his_o providence_n towards_o i_o and_o that_o to_o prevent_v the_o mischief_n of_o a_o unexpected_a continual_a jar_n all_o our_o life_n long_o i_o may_v be_v willing_a to_o be_v inquire_v into_o myself_o as_o well_o as_o to_o inquire_v after_o other_o and_o may_v not_o dissemble_o disguise_v for_o a_o fit_a that_o which_o will_v afterward_o come_v certain_o to_o be_v know_v expect_v that_o that_o love_n can_v be_v firm_a who_o foundation_n be_v lay_v upon_o a_o lie_n but_o that_o i_o may_v by_o myself_o or_o friend_n '_o full_o and_o free_o before_o engagement_n be_v past_a express_v what_o i_o expect_v both_o for_o piety_n and_o all_o other_o matter_n of_o habitation_n manner_n of_o live_v order_n of_o family_n and_o the_o like_a and_o what_o may_v be_v expect_v from_o i_o in_o each_o respect_n not_o fear_v that_o this_o faithfulness_n to_o myself_o and_o they_o shall_v make_v a_o breach_n but_o resolve_v that_o if_o this_o