Selected quad for the lemma: friend_n

Word A Word B Word C Word D Occurrence Frequency Band MI MI Band Prominent
friend_n become_v great_a time_n 820 5 3.1243 3 false
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ID Title Author Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication) STC Words Pages
A31196 The art of complaisance, or, The means to oblige in conversation S. C. 1673 (1673) Wing C119; ESTC R10330 48,007 195

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affair_n and_o conversation_n so_o our_o manner_n of_o procedure_n shall_v change_v and_o answer_v the_o inclination_n of_o the_o prince_n in_o the_o time_n of_o war_n we_o see_v a_o prince_n caress_n and_o endear_v his_o captain_n and_o man_n of_o war_n of_o who_o in_o time_n of_o peace_n the_o necessity_n be_v pass_v he_o make_v very_o little_a account_n and_o changege_v his_o martial_a inclination_n into_o those_o of_o pleasure_n he_o transfer_v favour_n and_o affection_n to_o the_o minister_n of_o his_o content_n tiberius_n be_v one_o under_o augustus_n another_o during_o the_o life_n of_o germanicus_n and_o drusus_n another_o during_o the_o life_n of_o livia_n his_o mother_n when_o he_o love_v and_o fear_v sejanus_n he_o very_o much_o differ_v from_o what_o he_o be_v when_o his_o fear_n be_v remove_v according_a to_o the_o say_n of_o passienus_n he_o never_o see_v a_o better_a servant_n than_o caligula_n in_o the_o time_n of_o tiberius_n nor_o a_o worse_a master_n when_o he_o arrive_v to_o the_o empire_n plutarch_n speak_v of_o the_o change_n of_o the_o manner_n of_o marius_n and_o sylla_n make_v a_o doubt_n whether_o it_o be_v their_o fortune_n which_o change_v their_o nature_n or_o which_o discover_v that_o which_o be_v conceal_v before_o for_o certain_a respect_n euripides_n make_v one_o to_o reproach_n agamemnon_n because_o of_o a_o humble_a man_n that_o he_o be_v and_o accostable_n before_o he_o be_v elect_v chief_a general_n of_o the_o greek_n he_o be_v now_o become_v a_o enemy_n of_o his_o friend_n difficult_a of_o access_n and_o have_v shut_v himself_o up_o in_o his_o house_n but_o the_o most_o great_a and_o most_o ordinary_a imperfection_n of_o prince_n come_v from_o presumption_n which_o oft_o time_n accompany_v power_n which_o render_v they_o difficult_a to_o receive_v counsel_n make_v they_o believe_v that_o as_o they_o be_v superior_a in_o power_n to_o their_o subject_n they_o be_v so_o also_o in_o sufficiency_n and_o some_o believe_v that_o 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vi_o of_o conversation_n all_o the_o world_n must_v acknowledge_v that_o it_o be_v conversation_n which_o contribute_v to_o render_v man_n sociable_a and_o make_v up_o the_o great_a commerce_n of_o our_o life_n so_o that_o we_o may_v say_v that_o it_o be_v impossible_a to_o take_v too_o much_o care_n to_o render_v our_o discourse_n please_v and_o profitable_a memory_n may_v furnish_v we_o with_o matter_n to_o maintain_v it_o but_o it_o can_v give_v we_o nothing_o but_o what_o we_o have_v treasure_v up_o before_o so_o that_o it_o be_v necessary_a that_o we_o labour_v to_o enrich_v it_o with_o a_o great_a number_n of_o the_o choice_a thing_n that_o it_o may_v make_v we_o restitution_n when_o we_o have_v occasion_n for_o they_o yet_o how_o necessary_a soever_o its_o succour_n may_v be_v it_o alone_o suffice_v not_o to_o make_v we_o successful_a in_o conversation_n since_o it_o be_v require_v that_o judgement_n be_v join_v with_o it_o to_o regulate_v what_o we_o have_v to_o speak_v and_o 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to_o he_o will_v you_o be_v wise_a from_o morning_n night_n we_o ought_v always_o in_o our_o discourse_n to_o have_v regard_n to_o truth_n as_o the_o ground_n of_o conversation_n but_o to_o avoid_v involve_v myself_o in_o those_o great_a question_n concern_v truth_n i_o shall_v content_v myself_o to_o say_v that_o it_o be_v a_o conformity_n of_o our_o word_n with_o our_o thought_n without_o determine_v whether_o there_o ought_v to_o be_v a_o precise_a similitude_n of_o the_o thought_n we_o express_v to_o the_o thing_n we_o have_v in_o our_o mind_n this_o virtue_n be_v so_o extensive_a that_o it_o be_v of_o general_a profit_n upon_o which_o all_o the_o commerce_n of_o this_o life_n may_v be_v very_o solid_o establish_v if_o man_n love_v it_o so_o much_o as_o they_o be_v enemy_n to_o it_o the_o most_o flourish_a nation_n have_v always_o have_v truth_n in_o a_o particular_a veneration_n the_o persian_n according_a to_o herodotus_n instruct_v their_o child_n to_o speak_v it_o very_o exact_o and_o indebt_v person_n be_v only_o hold_v in_o such_o contempt_n among_o they_o because_o they_o presume_v they_o be_v constrain_v to_o lie_v often_o when_o they_o converse_v with_o their_o creditor_n we_o see_v by_o our_o own_o experience_n that_o our_o own_o nation_n show_v themselves_o such_o friend_n to_o truth_n that_o they_o think_v nothing_o more_o offensive_a than_o when_o any_o give_v another_o the_o lie_n yet_o many_o person_n imagine_v that_o none_o can_v prosper_v in_o their_o design_n at_o court_n without_o a_o continual_a dissimulation_n and_o make_v a_o particular_a profession_n never_o to_o speak_v their_o true_a thought_n that_o error_n be_v almost_o general_a yet_o a_o reasonable_a distinction_n may_v draw_v we_o out_o of_o it_o i_o confess_v that_o a_o man_n to_o who_o one_o have_v entrust_v a_o secret_a be_v oblige_v to_o be_v faithful_a and_o not_o to_o discover_v what_o be_v important_a to_o be_v conceal_v it_o be_v not_o necessary_a that_o a_o courtier_n who_o aspire_v to_o some_o employment_n proclaim_v his_o pretension_n or_o discover_v the_o mean_v he_o intend_v to_o make_v use_n of_o since_o his_o competitour_n may_v draw_v from_o thence_o a_o advantage_n to_o his_o prejudice_n but_o in_o the_o ordinary_a course_n of_o a_o man_n life_n for_o what_o reason_n be_v he_o bind_v to_o lie_v perpetual_o and_o to_o make_v a_o virtue_n of_o so_o great_a a_o vice_n can_v it_o be_v believe_v that_o a_o man_n who_o caress_n indifferent_o all_o the_o world_n and_o who_o promise_v all_o those_o who_o make_v any_o address_n to_o he_o to_o serve_v they_o without_o any_o such_o intention_n can_v make_v himself_o many_o friend_n or_o establish_v himself_o in_o a_o reputation_n of_o be_v civil_a and_o oblige_a on_o the_o contrary_a though_o he_o blind_v they_o at_o present_a by_o such_o procedure_n it_o will_v not_o be_v long_o before_o they_o be_v disabused_a
something_o more_o important_a sometime_o feign_v to_o hate_v one_o and_o to_o love_v another_o though_o their_o mind_n and_o affection_n be_v dispose_v quite_o contrary_a this_o dissimulation_n though_o it_o be_v necessary_a to_o all_o sort_n of_o person_n yet_o more_o especial_o to_o the_o courtier_n for_o the_o better_a conduct_n of_o his_o ambition_n yet_o it_o be_v always_o to_o be_v practise_v with_o this_o caution_n that_o it_o be_v seasonable_a and_o mix_v like_o antidote_n in_o the_o composition_n of_o medicine_n which_o administer_v seasonable_o profit_v the_o patient_a but_o out_o of_o season_n prove_v too_o oft_o destructive_a dissimulation_n or_o subtlety_n once_o discover_v not_o only_o become_v unserviceable_a to_o we_o but_o render_v we_o suspect_v to_o those_o who_o confidence_n be_v necessary_a to_o the_o prosperity_n of_o our_o design_n the_o practice_n of_o it_o consist_v in_o three_o thing_n in_o silence_n in_o our_o word_n and_o in_o our_o action_n and_o outward_a appearance_n in_o silence_n by_o keep_v secret_a what_o may_v prejudice_v our_o friend_n and_o our_o design_n which_o depend_v on_o the_o not_o disclose_v the_o secret_a but_o especial_o in_o hide_v the_o affront_n and_o offence_n which_o be_v do_v not_o only_o for_o to_o give_v we_o the_o better_a mean_n of_o revenge_n if_o the_o matter_n deserve_v it_o but_o also_o that_o we_o may_v not_o provoke_v he_o who_o have_v offend_v we_o to_o heap_v great_a upon_o we_o the_o better_a to_o prevent_v the_o execution_n of_o our_o vengeance_n this_o dissimulation_n which_o be_v practise_v by_o silence_n have_v always_o and_o in_o all_o occasion_n meet_v with_o approbation_n and_o it_o be_v thus_o that_o the_o senator_n demean_v themselves_o to_o tiberius_n counterfeit_v when_o they_o can_v not_o approve_v not_o to_o understand_v his_o design_n ne_o dissimulans_fw-la suspectior_fw-la fieret_fw-la say_v tacitus_n there_o be_v always_o some_o occasion_n wherein_o silence_n will_v be_v suspect_v and_o it_o be_v sometime_o fit_a that_o we_o express_v our_o displeasure_n but_o yet_o it_o must_v be_v in_o such_o a_o manner_n that_o after_o a_o light_a complaint_n we_o make_v it_o believe_v that_o we_o will_v not_o remember_v it_o or_o resent_v it_o but_o it_o sometime_o happen_v that_o there_o be_v necessity_n to_o dissemble_v in_o our_o word_n this_o require_v more_o caution_n and_o artifice_n there_o be_v some_o who_o with_o a_o wonderful_a agility_n break_v from_o the_o subject_n and_o leap_v to_o another_o but_o that_o way_n can_v be_v practise_v at_o all_o time_n with_o equal_a happiness_n nor_o be_v it_o always_o answer_v with_o success_n for_o this_o reason_n our_o answer_n in_o such_o occasion_n aught_o like_o a_o retreat_n be_v make_v without_o fly_v and_o without_o combat_v observe_v these_o three_o thing_n first_o not_o to_o enter_v into_o a_o denial_n of_o what_o be_v affirm_v for_o a_o absolute_a truth_n the_o second_o not_o to_o speak_v any_o thing_n that_o may_v prove_v injurious_a the_o three_o to_o leave_v the_o spirit_n of_o he_o to_o who_o we_o speak_v in_o doubt_n by_o term_n ambiguous_a and_o the_o more_o reserve_v the_o answer_n be_v the_o more_o laudable_a yet_o it_o be_v permit_v to_o we_o to_o dissemble_v with_o exterior_a appearance_n as_o in_o conceal_v our_o joy_n sorrow_n hope_v desire_v fear_v choler_n or_o other_o passion_n always_o seem_v not_o to_o see_v or_o hear_v either_o what_o be_v do_v or_o say_v if_o we_o find_v any_o difficulty_n in_o return_v of_o a_o reply_n or_o if_o it_o bring_v no_o fruit_n or_o advantage_n to_o we_o chap._n iii_o of_o dexterity_n there_o be_v one_o other_o part_n of_o complaisance_n which_o be_v so_o join_v with_o it_o that_o it_o be_v impossible_a to_o be_v complaisant_a without_o it_o this_o i_o will_v call_v dexterity_n since_o we_o usual_o call_v those_o dexterous_a who_o be_v nimble_a proper_a and_o fit_a for_o all_o kind_n of_o motion_n and_o who_o know_v easy_o to_o surmount_v the_o most_o painful_a and_o unexpected_a traverse_n from_o this_o similitude_n we_o may_v call_v that_o power_n dexterity_n by_o mean_n whereof_o we_o dispatch_v our_o affair_n with_o most_o happiness_n render_v that_o which_o be_v difficult_a easy_a and_o pleasant_a receive_v and_o represent_v all_o thing_n without_o gall_n or_o bitterness_n on_o the_o contrary_a there_o be_v some_o person_n so_o unapt_a that_o the_o least_o thing_n they_o make_v mighty_a represent_v the_o most_o easy_a difficult_a and_o always_o aggravate_v to_o insupportable_a those_o that_o be_v grievous_a ever_o want_v a_o capacity_n to_o manage_v their_o affair_n but_o in_o a_o for_o ill_a manner_n render_v they_o lame_a imperfect_a and_o sometime_o impossible_a in_o which_o they_o imitate_v those_o unskilful_a surgeon_n who_o in_o lieu_n of_o heal_a render_v the_o wound_n incurable_a but_o on_o the_o contrary_a the_o prudent_a and_o judicious_a sweeten_v the_o ill_a and_o mitigate_v the_o pain_n by_o lenitive_a unction_n or_o if_o they_o make_v incision_n they_o cast_v the_o patient_n into_o such_o a_o sleep_n as_o make_v he_o insensible_a after_o their_o example_n we_o must_v represent_v thing_n which_o appear_v difficult_a and_o grievous_a by_o insinuate_v they_o sweet_o into_o the_o spirit_n of_o those_o to_o who_o we_o speak_v without_o violence_n or_o constraint_n dispose_v they_o by_o little_a and_o little_a to_o enter_v into_o consideration_n of_o our_o reason_n serve_v ourselves_o of_o these_o mean_n principal_o with_o they_o who_o be_v of_o a_o nature_n rough_a eager_a and_o impatient_a or_o by_o some_o other_o passion_n or_o interest_n show_v themselves_o in_o supportable_a use_v word_n full_a of_o arrogance_n and_o such_o as_o seem_v rather_o to_o defy_v we_o to_o the_o combat_n then_o amicable_o to_o treat_v with_o we_o it_o be_v from_o the_o impetuous_a assault_n of_o these_o who_o like_a bull_n chafe_v &_o enrage_v bow_v their_o rugged_a front_n to_o the_o earth_n in_o a_o posture_n to_o overturn_v their_o enrager_n that_o the_o dextrous_a person_n save_v himself_o by_o his_o agility_n nimble_o divert_v to_o another_o side_n and_o by_o a_o light_n leap_v pass_v to_o a_o subject_n more_o agreeable_a not_o appear_v disturb_v or_o the_o least_o discompose_v by_o extravagant_a or_o word_n full_a of_o passion_n it_o be_v not_o as_o some_o unjust_o think_v a_o act_n so_o servile_a for_o a_o man_n who_o continue_v reason_n his_o companion_n to_o answer_v sometime_o pleasant_o and_o without_o anger_n to_o those_o who_o be_v in_o choler_n or_o speak_v in_o passion_n but_o on_o the_o contrary_n i_o esteem_v it_o a_o thing_n worthy_a of_o a_o well_o temper_a mind_n &_o a_o spirit_n replenish_v with_o prudence_n and_o yet_o more_o suitable_a to_o person_n of_o the_o high_a quality_n then_o to_o those_o of_o low_a condition_n it_o be_v as_o much_o their_o duty_n and_o a_o great_a subject_n of_o triumph_n to_o subdue_v their_o own_o affection_n in_o this_o dexterity_n then_o we_o ought_v to_o do_v as_o they_o who_o play_v at_o tennis_n who_o regard_v not_o only_o to_o toss_v back_o the_o ball_n dextrous_o but_o also_o to_o do_v it_o so_o that_o they_o may_v be_v ready_a to_o receive_v it_o in_o place_n from_o whence_o they_o may_v return_v it_o where_o it_o may_v be_v most_o advantageous_a for_o the_o game_n thus_o in_o treat_v or_o converse_v we_o ought_v to_o have_v the_o same_o consideration_n and_o then_o we_o shall_v seldom_o be_v unprovided_a of_o a_o seasonable_a reply_n with_o this_o artifice_n we_o may_v sometime_o dissemble_v honest_o and_o seem_v not_o to_o understand_v or_o not_o to_o know_v something_o that_o import_v the_o discourse_n which_o be_v make_v we_o to_o the_o end_n that_o we_o may_v gain_v time_n to_o answer_v and_o to_o secure_v we_o from_o surprise_n or_o reply_v in_o confusion_n but_o if_o we_o adventure_v to_o declare_v our_o judgement_n or_o resolution_n let_v it_o be_v in_o such_o a_o manner_n that_o let_v the_o success_n be_v what_o it_o will_v we_o may_v still_o rest_v upon_o our_o foot_n and_o find_v a_o door_n still_o open_v behind_o imitate_v mucianus_n in_o his_o answer_n to_o antonius_n primus_fw-la who_o demand_v his_o advice_n if_o he_o shall_v attend_v vespasian_n and_o attack_v rome_n tacitus_n lib._n 3._o of_o his_o history_n but_o above_o all_o we_o must_v careful_o shun_v the_o occasion_n to_o break_v abrupt_o from_o the_o question_n but_o with_o all_o imaginary_a caution_n excuse_v we_o upon_o the_o long_a and_o importunate_a press_v of_o our_o affair_n remit_v it_o to_o another_o time_n or_o by_o remonstrate_v that_o the_o quality_n of_o that_o affair_n be_v not_o to_o be_v treat_v on_o at_o that_o time_n and_o in_o that_o place_n or_o by_o allege_v the_o impossibility_n of_o it_o there_o be_v not_o a_o more_o nice_a and_o difficult_a point_n in_o conversation_n than_o the_o art_n of_o refusal_n since_o every_o one_o persuade_v himself_o that_o
one_o not_o endeavour_v to_o make_v ourselves_o believe_v their_o equal_n to_o descend_v below_o our_o equal_n and_o to_o submit_v even_o to_o those_o who_o be_v beneath_o we_o many_o think_v it_o sufficient_a to_o a_o courtier_n to_o hold_v himself_o in_o the_o first_o degree_n for_o fear_v a_o humility_n too_o low_o render_v he_o despise_v but_o since_o the_o court_n be_v so_o compose_v that_o ofttimes_o the_o great_a stand_n in_o need_n of_o the_o least_o there_o be_v some_o office_n only_o to_o be_v do_v by_o the_o mean_a sort_n a_o courtier_n be_v constrain_v to_o gain_v they_o by_o caress_n and_o countenance_n full_a of_o humility_n caesar_n who_o live_v in_o a_o republic_n in_o which_o that_o humility_n be_v no_o less_o necessary_a to_o a_o ambitious_a man_n then_o in_o the_o court_n of_o a_o monarch_n caress_v and_o flatter_v the_o vile_a of_o the_o people_n yet_o in_o this_o we_o must_v be_v careful_a to_o observe_v a_o mediocrity_n always_o demeaning_a ourselves_o according_a to_o the_o quality_n of_o the_o person_n never_o debase_v we_o too_o low_a but_o restrain_v our_o humility_n within_o the_o bound_n of_o courtesy_n and_o decent_a affability_n some_o person_n of_o a_o mean_a descent_n see_v themselves_o high_a advance_v in_o credit_n in_o a_o very_a short_a time_n think_v they_o can_v surmount_v the_o contempt_n of_o their_o former_a condition_n and_o extraction_n if_o they_o bear_v not_o themselves_o haughty_o and_o make_v not_o themselves_o fear_v remit_v the_o moderation_n of_o their_o lofty_a procedure_n and_o the_o resume_v a_o sweet_a and_o courteous_a behaviour_n till_o by_o the_o continuance_n of_o their_o prosperity_n and_o great_a fortune_n that_o contempt_n with_o the_o remembrance_n of_o their_o first_o condition_n be_v efface_v but_o it_o be_v to_o be_v fear_v that_o this_o change_n do_v but_o difficult_o or_o too_o late_o happen_v a_o man_n who_o be_v accustom_v to_o pride_n be_v not_o able_a easy_o to_o divest_v himself_o of_o it_o 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herein_o we_o must_v be_v careful_a that_o all_o our_o look_n be_v full_a of_o sweetness_n kindness_n and_o modesty_n not_o affect_v and_o without_o grimace_n the_o carriage_n of_o the_o body_n decent_a without_o extraordinary_a or_o apish_a gesture_n in_o all_o our_o ordinary_a action_n be_v it_o in_o eat_v drink_v or_o the_o like_a we_o must_v show_v modesty_n and_o follow_v that_o which_o be_v most_o receive_v among_o those_o with_o who_o we_o converse_v for_o that_o courtier_n be_v but_o over_o punctual_a who_o in_o a_o country_n gentleman_n house_n will_v strict_o practise_v all_o his_o form_n of_o new_a breed_n and_o will_v not_o be_v content_a to_o express_v his_o thanks_o and_o esteem_v to_o other_o in_o the_o same_o manner_n and_o with_o the_o same_o ceremony_n that_o he_o receive_v the_o respect_n of_o other_o his_o practice_n show_v like_o a_o correction_n of_o the_o other_o and_o oft_o put_v the_o modest_a company_n into_o a_o bashful_a confusion_n and_o constrain_v distrustful_a behaviour_n and_o conversation_n 3._o our_o clothes_n ought_v to_o be_v proper_a and_o suitable_a not_o superfluous_a and_o according_a to_o the_o fashion_n then_o in_o use_n without_o be_v fantastic_a in_o too_o much_o affect_v new_a or_o counterfeit_v gravity_n in_o obstinate_o follow_v the_o old_a the_o best_a rule_n in_o this_o age_n be_v to_o consider_v the_o fashion_n and_o countenance_n of_o those_o who_o possess_v the_o reputation_n of_o this_o decent_a mediocrity_n that_o we_o may_v conform_v and_o prepare_v ourselves_o to_o a_o imitation_n affability_n consist_v in_o many_o thing_n but_o principal_o in_o the_o knowledge_n to_o give_v a_o oblige_a reception_n to_o all_o person_n to_o entertain_v they_o with_o freedom_n and_o kindness_n to_o salute_v honour_n and_o respect_v they_o in_o short_a by_o all_o outward_a sign_n and_o caress_n that_o may_v assure_v they_o of_o our_o courtesy_n and_o good_a will_n give_v they_o by_o these_o attractive_a way_n all_o the_o assurance_n and_o confidence_n that_o may_v be_v it_o be_v not_o enough_o for_o to_o confirm_v entire_o the_o spirit_n of_o man_n and_o to_o establish_v and_o believe_v that_o they_o be_v belove_v by_o we_o to_o have_v a_o good_a will_n towards_o they_o and_o a_o great_a desire_n to_o aid_v they_o but_o we_o must_v with_o a_o agrreable_a visage_n and_o a_o sweet_a courteous_a entertainment_n encourage_v and_o invite_v they_o to_o be_v familiar_a with_o we_o and_o have_v by_o these_o mean_v draw_v they_o thus_o far_o to_o hearken_v to_o they_o with_o sign_n of_o contentment_n and_o patience_n for_o he_o who_o will_v not_o yield_v attention_n to_o what_o be_v say_v can_v be_v name_v affable_a no_o more_o than_o he_o who_o constant_o and_o harsh_o interrupt_v the_o discourse_n of_o another_o or_o who_o contradict_v or_o divines_n what_o another_o will_v say_v the_o last_o be_v only_o a_o foolish_a vanity_n to_o be_v admire_v for_o a_o nimble_a conception_n and_o a_o vast_a and_o comprehensive_a understanding_n and_o it_o ordinary_o fall_v out_o that_o such_o person_n themselves_o be_v ridiculous_a and_o confuse_a with_o the_o loss_n of_o time_n and_o thus_o to_o interrupt_v or_o interpret_v without_o infinite_a modesty_n the_o conception_n of_o he_o who_o speak_v or_o not_o to_o be_v attentive_a be_v a_o offence_n and_o a_o testimony_n of_o contempt_n now_o this_o attention_n be_v principal_o show_v by_o answer_v to_o the_o purpose_n and_o with_o judgement_n and_o mildness_n fly_v as_o much_o as_o possible_a rude_a and_o eager_a repartee_n create_v a_o hope_n in_o those_o who_o speak_v to_o we_o that_o they_o may_v easy_o approach_v we_o and_o speak_v what_o and_o as_o oft_o as_o they_o please_v but_o though_o this_o facility_n be_v necessary_a to_o all_o sort_n of_o person_n and_o on_o all_o occasion_n yet_o it_o be_v most_o necessary_a to_o person_n of_o the_o high_a rank_n in_o the_o management_n of_o their_o affair_n for_o their_o inferior_n entertain_v a_o opinion_n that_o those_o who_o use_v this_o affability_n descend_v equal_a to_o they_o they_o become_v so_o assure_v that_o they_o fear_v not_o to_o discover_v open_o their_o thought_n and_o all_o their_o design_n as_o if_o it_o be_v to_o their_o companion_n and_o friend_n insomuch_o that_o those_o that_o practise_v this_o art_n seem_v to_o keep_v a_o key_n to_o unlock_v man_n heart_n at_o pleasure_n but_o as_o the_o honour_n that_o we_o receive_v from_o a_o person_n of_o quality_n be_v not_o agreeable_a only_o in_o regard_n of_o his_o person_n but_o also_o because_o his_o countenance_n and_o caress_n obtain_v we_o credit_n with_o other_o so_o the_o contempt_n which_o a_o great_a person_n show_v be_v not_o only_o grievous_a in_o regard_n of_o himself_o but_o become_v insupportable_a to_o we_o when_o we_o find_v our_o esteem_n lessen_v with_o those_o who_o be_v spectator_n of_o our_o ill_a treatment_n though_o this_o affability_n ought_v always_o to_o be_v accompany_v with_o sweetness_n i_o do_v not_o intend_v that_o ought_v not_o to_o be_v attend_v with_o gravity_n and_o decency_n suitable_a to_o our_o condition_n and_o estate_n in_o short_a affability_n ought_v to_o be_v mix_v with_o sweetness_n &_o severity_n or_o to_o speak_v better_a it_o ought_v to_o be_v as_o a_o mean_a betwixt_o these_o two_o extremity_n so_o that_o the_o one_o may_v not_o render_v we_o a_o terror_n to_o those_o who_o have_v any_o affair_n with_o we_o or_o the_o other_o too_o much_o debase_v we_o and_o subject_v we_o to_o the_o contempt_n which_o too_o great_a familiarity_n general_o produce_v but_o that_o it_o may_v be_v full_a of_o dignity_n and_o agreeable_a according_a to_o the_o quality_n of_o affair_n person_n and_o other_o circumstance_n for_o so_o much_o of_o these_o as_o concern_v our_o outward_a behaviour_n i_o shall_v omit_v there_o have_v be_v a_o particular_a discourse_n of_o that_o subject_n call_v the_o rule_n of_o civility_n write_v original_o in_o the_o french_a