thy sommer Nym And what dost thou thinke of the Dukes ouerture of marriage Hero: What doe you thinke Her: May I speake boldly as at Alleppo Nym Speake till thy lungs ake talke out thy teeth here are none of those cankers these mischiefes of societie intelligencers or informers that wil cast rumor into the teeth of some Lalius Baldus a man cruelly eloquent and bluddily learned no what sayest thou Fawnus Her: With an vndoubted brest thus I may speake boldly Hero: By this night I le speake broadly first and thou wilt man our Duke of Vrbin is a man very happily madd for he thinkes himselfe right perfectly wise and most demonstratiuely learned nay more Her: No more I le on me thinkes the younge Lord our Prince of Ferrara so bounteously adorned with all of grace feature and best shaped proportion faire vse of speech full opportunitie that which makes the sympothie of all equalitie of heate of yeares of bloud mee thinkes these Loadstones should attract the mettall of the young Princes rather to the sonne than to the noysome cold and most weake side of his halfe rotten father Her: Tha' rt ours tha' rt ours now dare we speake as boldly as if Adam had not fallen and made vs all slaues harke ye the Duke is an arrant doting Asse an Asse and in the knowledge of my verie sence will turne a foolish animall for his sonne will proue like one of Balles priests haue all the flesh presented to the Idoll his father but he in the night will feede on 't will deuoure it he will yeoman of the bottels he will Her Now gentlemen I am sure the lust of speech hath equally drenched vs all know I am no seruant to this Prince Tiberio Hero: Not Her: Not but one to him out of some priuate vrging most vowed one that pursues him but for opportunity of safe satisfaction now if ye can preferre my seruice to him I shall rest yours wholy Hero: Iust in the diuels mouth thou shalt haue place Fawns thou shalt behold this generous Nymphadoro a gallant of a cleane boote straight back and beard of a most hopefull expectation he is a seruant of faire Dulcimels her very creature borne to the Princes sole adoration a man so spent in time to her that pietie if no more of grace must follow him when we haue gayned the roome second his suite Hercules I le be your intelligencer Her: Our very heart and if neede be worke to most desperate ends Hero Well vrged Her: Wordes fit acquaintance but ful actions friends Nym Thou shalt not want Fawnus Her: You promise well Hero: Be thou but firme that old doting iniquitie of age that only eyed lecherous Duke thy Lord shall be baffuld to extreamest derision his sonne proue his foole fathers owne issue Nym And wee and thou with vs blessed and inriched past all miserie of possible contempt and aboue the hopes of greatest coniectures Her: Nay as for wealth vilia miretur vulgus I know by his physiognomy for wealth he is of my addiction bid's a fico for 't Nym Why thou art but a yonger brother but poore Baldazozo Hero: Faith to speake truth my means are written in the booke of fare as yet vnknowne and yet I am at my foole and my hunting gelding come Viah to this feastfull entertainment Exeunt rema Hercu Her: I neuer knew till now how old I was By him by whome we are I thinke a Prince Whose tender sufferance neuer felt a gust Of boulder breathings but still liu'd gently fann'd With the soft gales of his owne flatterers lippes Shall neuer know his owne complexion Deere sleepe and lust I thanke you but for you Mortall till now I scarse had knowne my selfe Thou gratefvll poyson sleeke mischiefe Flatterie Thou dreamefull slumber that doth fall on kings As soft and soone as their first holy oyle Be thou for euer dam'd I now repent Seuere indictions to some sharpe stiles Freenes so 't grow not to licentiousnes Is gratfull to iust states Most spotlesse kingdome And men o happie borne vnder good starrs Where what is honest you may freely thinke Speake what you thinke and write what you doe speake Not bound to seruile soothings But since our rancke Hath euer been afflicted with these flyes That blow corruption on the sweetest vertues I will reuenge vs all vpon you all With the same stratagem we still are caught Flatterie it selfe and sure all knowes the sharpenesse Of reprehensiue language is euen blunted To full contempt since vice is now term'd fashion And most are growne to ill euen with defence I vow to wast this most prodigious heat That fals into my age like scorching flames In depth of numb'd December in flattering all In all of their extreamest vitiousnesse Till in their owne lou'd race they fall most lame And meet full butte the close of Vices shame Exit ACTVS SECVNDVS SCENA PRIMA Herod and Nymphadoro with napkins in their hands followed by Pages with stooles and meat Her: Come Sir a stoole boy these Court Feasts are to vs Seruitors Court Fasts such scambling such shift for to eate and where to eate here a Squire of lowe degree hath got the carkasse of a Plouer there Pages of the Chamber diuide the spoyles of a tatterd Phesant here the Sewer has friended a Countrey Gentleman with a sweet green goose and there a yong fellow that late has bought his office has caught a Woodcocke by the nose with cups full euer flowing Nym. But is not Faunus prefer'd with a right hand Her: Did you euer see a fellow so spurted vp in a moment he has got the right eare of the Duke the Prince Princesse most of the Lords but all the Ladies why hee is become their onely Minion Vsher and Supporter Nym. He hath gotten more lou'd reputation of vertue of learning of all graces in one houre than all your snarling reformers haue in Her: Nay that 's vnquestionable and indeed what a fruitles labor what a filling of Danaes tubbe is it become to inueigh against follie communitie takes away the sence and example the shame no prayse me these fellowes hang on their chariot wheele And mount with them whom fortune heaues nay driues A stoycall sower vertue seldome thriues Oppose such fortune and then burst with those are pitied The hill of Chaunce is pau'd with poore mens bones And bulkes of luckles soules ouer whose eyes Their charriot wheeles must ruthles grate that rise Enter Hercules freshly suted Nym Behold that thing of most fortunate most prosperous impudence Don Fanus himselfe Her: Blessed and long lasting bee thy carnation ribban O man of more than wit much more than vertue of fortune Fawnus wilt eate any of a young spring sallet He: where did the hearbs grow my gallant where did they grow Hero: Hard by in the Citie here Her: No I le none I le eate no Citie hearbes no Citie roots for here in the Cittie a man shall haue his excrements in his
a figure called Aposiopesis or Increpatio Exeunt Gonzago Granuffo Tib. Proue you but iustlie louing and conceiue me Iustice shall leaue the gods before I leaue thee Imagination proue as true as thou art sweete And tho the Duke seeme wise hee le finde this straine When two harts yeelde consent all thwartinges vaine O quick deuisefull strong braind Dulcimel Thou art too full of witte to be a wife Why dost thou loue or what strong heat gaue life To such faint hopes O woman thou art made Most onelie of and for deceit thy forme Is nothing but delusion of our eyes Our eares our heartes and sometimes of our hands Hipocrisie and vanitie brought forth Without male heat thy most most monstrous being Shall I abuse my royall fathers trust And make my selfe a scorne the very foode Of rumor infamous shall I that euer loathede A thought of woman now begin to loue My worthy fathers right breake faith to him that got me To get a faithlesse woman Her True my worthy Lord your grace is verè pius Tib. To take from my good father the pleasure of his eyes And of his hands imaginary solace of his fading life Herc. His life that onely liues to your sole good Tib. And my selfe good his lifes most onely end Herc. Which O may neuer end Tib. Yes Fawne in time we must not prescribe to nature euery thing ther 's some end in euery thing Her But in a woman yet as she is a wife she is Oftentimes the end of her husband Tib. Shal I I say Herc. Shall you I say confound your owne faire hopes Crosse all your course of life make your selfe vaine To your once steady grauenes and all to second The ambitious quicknes of a monstrous loue That 's onely out of difficultie borne And followed onelie for the miracle In the obtaining I would ha ye now Tell her father all Tib. Vncompassionate vilde man shall I not pittie if I cannot loue Or rather shall I not for pittie loue So wondrous wit in so most wondrous beautie That with such rarest arte and cunning meanes Entreates what I thing valules am not Worthie but to graunt my admiration Are fathers to be thought on in our loues Herc. True right sir fathers or friends a crowne And loue hath none but are allied to themselues alone Your father I may boldlie say hee 's an Asse To hope that you le forbeare to swallow What he cannot chew nay e't is iniustice truelie For him to judge it fit that you should starue For that which onelie hee can feast his eye withall And not disgest Tib. O Fawne what man of so colde earth But must loue such a wit in such a body Thou last and onelie rarenes of heauens workes From best of man made modell of the Gods Diuinest woman thou perfection Of all proportions Beutie made when Ioue was blith VVell filde with Nectar and full friendes with man Thou deare as aire necessarie as sleepe To carefull man woman O who can sin so deepely As to be curst from knowing of the pleasures Thy soft society modest amorousnes Yeeldes to our tedious life Fawne the Duke shal not know this Herc. Vnlesse you tell him but what hope can liue in you VVhen your short stay and your most shortned conference Not onely actions but euen lookes abstrude Cut off all possibilities of obtaining Tib. Tush Fawne to violence of womens loue and wit Nothing but not obtayning is impossible Notumque furens quid foemina possit Herc. But then how rest you to your father true Tib. To him that onely can giue dues she rests most due Exit Herc. Euen so he that with safety would wel lurke in courts To best elected ends of force is wrung To keepe broade eyes soft feet long ears most short tongue For ti 's of knowing creatures the maine art To vse quicke hammes wide armes and most close heart Actus tertii Finis ACTVS QVARTVS Enter Hercules and Garbetza Herc. VVhy ti 's a most wel in fashion affection Dona Garbetza your Knight S. Amaros is a man of a most vnfortunate back spits white has an ill breath at three after dinner goes to the Bath takes the diet nay which is more takes Tobacco therefore with great authority you may cuckolde him Gar. I hope so but would that friend my brother discouer me would he wrong himselfe to preiudice me Herc. No preiudice deare Garbetza his brother your husband right he cuckold his eldest brother true hee gets her with child iust Garb. Sure ther 's no wrong in right true and iust Herc. And indeede since the vertue of procreation growed hopeles in your husband to whome should you rather commit your loue and honour to then him that is most like and neere your husband his brother but are you assured your friend and brother rests intirelie constant solely to you Garb. To me O Fawne let me sigh it with ioy into thy bosome my brother has been woed by this that and tother Lady to entertaine thē for I ha seen their letters but his vow to me O Faw is most immutable vnfaining peculiar indeed deserued Enter Puttotta and a Page Puttotta with a letter in his hand Put. Neuer intreat me neuer beseech me to haue pittie forsooth on your Master M. Herod Let him neuer be so daringly ambitious as to hope with all his vowes and protestations to gaine my affectiō gods my discretiō has my my sutlery tapstry laundrie made mee be tane vpp at the Court preferde mee to a husband and haue I adaunc't my husband with the labour of mine owne bodie from the blacke guarde to bee one of the Dukes drūmers to make him one of the court forkers shal I that purefy many Lords some Ladies cā tel who weares perfumes who plaisters and for why know whose a gallant of a chast shirt and who not shall I become or dares your master thinke I will become or if I would becom presumes your Master to hope I would become one of his common feminines no let M. Herod bragge of his brothers wife I skorne his letters and her leauings at my heele ifaith and so tell him Pag. Nay costlie deare Puttotta Mistres Puttotta madam Puttotta O be mercifull to my languishing master hee may in time growe great and wel grac't Courtier for hee weares yellow already mixe therefore your loues as for madam Garbetza his brothers wife you see what he writes there Put. I must confesse he saies shee is a spinie greene creature of an vnholesome barren bloud and cold imbrace a bony thing of most vnequall hyppes vneuen eyes ill rankt teeth and indeede one but that shee hires him he endures not yet for al this does hee hope to dishonest me I am for his betters I would he should well know it for more by many then my husband know I am a woman of a knowne sound and vpright carriage and so he shall finde if he deale with me and so tel him
teeth againe within foure and twentie houres I loue no Citie fallets has't any Canarie Nym How the poore snake wriggles with this suddain warmth Herod drinkes Hero: Here Fawnus a health as deepe as a female Her: Fore Ioue we must be more indeer'd Nym How doost thou feele thy selfe now Fawne Her: Verie womanly with my fingers I protest I thinke I shall loue you are you married I am truely taken with your vertues are you married Hero: Yes Her: Why I like you well for it Hero: No troth Fawne I am not married Her: Why I like you better for it fore heauen I must loue you Hero: Why Fawne why Her: Fore-heauen you are blest with three rare graces fine linnen cleane linings a sanguine complexion and I am sure an excellent wit for you are a gentleman borne Hero: Thanke thee sweet Fawne but why is cleane linnen such a grace I prethee Her: Oh my excellent and inward deerely approoued friend What 's your name sir cleane linnen is the first our life craues and the last our death enioyes Hero: But what hope rests for Nymphadora thou art now within the buttons of the Prince shall the Duke his Father marry she Ladie Her: T is to be hoped not Nym That 's some releefe as long as ther 's hope Her: But sure sir t is almost vndoubted the Ladie will carrie him Nym O pestilent ayre is there no plot so cunning no surmise so false no way of auoidance Her: Hast thou any pittie either of his passion or the Ladies yeares a Gentleman in the summer hunting season of hir youth the Ladie met in the same warmth wer 't not to bee wept that such a saplesse chafing-dish vsing old dotard as the Duke of Ferrara with his withered hand shoulde plucke such a bud such a Oh the life of sence Nym Thou art now a perfect Courtier of iust fashion good grace canst not releeue vs Her: Ha ye any money Nym Pish Fawne we are young Gallants Her: The liker to haue no mony But my young Gallants to speake like my selfe I must hugge your humor Why looke you there is fate destiny constellations and Planets which though they are vnder nature yet they are aboue women who hath read the booke of chaunce no cherish your hope sweeten your imaginations with thoughts of ah why women are the most giddie vncertaine motions vnder heauen t is neither proportion of body vertue of minde amplitude of fortune greatnesse of blood but onely meere chancefull appetie swayes them which makes some one like a man be it but for the paring of his nales viah as for inequalitie art not a gentleman Nym That I am and my benificence shall shew it Her: I know you are by the onely worde benificence which onely speakes of the future tence shall know it but may I breath in your bosoms I onely feare Tiberio will abuse your fathers trust and so make your hopes desperate Nym How the Prince would hee onely stood crosse to my wishes he should find me an Italian Her: How an Italian Hero: By thy ayd an Italian deere Fawnus thou art now wrigled into the Princes bosome and thy sweet hand should Minister that Nectar to him should make him immortall Nymphadoro in direct phrase thou shouldst murther the Prince so reuenge thine owne wronges and be rewarded for that reuenge Her: Afore the light of my eyes I thinke I shall admire wonder at you What ha ye plots proiects correspondences and stratagems why are not you in better place Enter sir Amoroso Who 's this Herod my eldest Brother sir Amoroso Debilidoso Her: Oh I know him God blesse thine eyes sweet sir Amoroso a rous a vin de monte to the health of thy Chyne my deere sweet Signiour Her: Oh no sir hee takes the diet this spring alwaies boy my brothers bottell Sir Amor, Faith Fawne an odde vnwholsome cold makes mee still hoarse and rhumatique Hero: Yes in troth a paltrie murre last morning hee blew nine bones out of his nose with an odde vnwholesome murre how do's my sister your Ladie what do's she breed Her: I perceiue Knight you haue children oh t is a blessed assurance of heauens fauour and long lasting name to haue many children Sir Amor: But I ha none Fawne now Her: O that 's most excellent a right speciall happinesse hee shall not bee a Drudge to his cradle a slaue to his childe hee shall be sure not to cherish anothers blood nor toyle to aduance paraduenture some Rascals lust without children a man is vnclog'd his wife almost a Maide Messalina thou cryedst out O blessed barrennesse why once with child the verie Venus of a Ladies entertainment hath lost all pleasure Sir Amor: By this ring Fawnus I doe hugge thee with most passionate affection and shall make my wife thanke thee Her: Nay my Brother grudgeth not at my probable inheritance he meanes once to giue a younger brother hope to see fortune Nym And yet I heare sir Amorosus you cherish your loynes with high art the onely ingrosser of Eringoes prepar'd Cantharides Cullesses made of dissolued Pearle and brus'd Amber the pith of Parkets and canded Lamstones are his perpetuall meats Beds made of the downe vnder pigeons winges and Goose-necks fomentations bathes electuaries frictions and all the nurses of most forcible excited concupiscence hee vseth with most nice and tender industrie Her: Pish Zuccoli no Nymphadoro if sir Amorous would ha children let him lie on a mattres plow or thresh eate onyons garlick and leeke porredge Pharoah and his councell were mistaken and their deuise to hinder the encrease of procreation in the Israelites with inforcing them to much laboure of bodie and to feed hard with beetes garlike and onions meat that make the orriginall of man most sharpe and taking was absurd No hee should haue giuen barlie bread lettice mellones cucumers huge store of veale and fresh beefe blown vppe their flesh held them from excercise rould them in feathers most suerely seene them drunke once a day then would they at their best haue begotten but wenches and in short time their generation infeebled to nothing Sir Am Oh deuine Fawnus where might a man take vp fortie pound in a commoditie of garlike and onions Nymphadoro thine eare Her: Come what are you fleering at ther 's some weakenes in your brother you wrinkle at thus come prethee imparte what we are mutually incorporated turnd one into another biued togeather come I beleeue you are familiar with your sister and it were knowne Hero: Witch Fawnus witch why how dost dreame I liue i st fower score a yeare thinkst thou maintaines my geldings my pages foote-clothes my best feeding high play and excellent company no t is from hence from hence I mynt some foure hundred pound a yeere Her: Dost thou liue like a porter by the backe boy Hero As for my weake raind brother hang him hee has sore shinnes dam him Hetoroclite his braine 's perished his