him If I get not from this drunken Rabble I expose my honour and if I fall into my Brother's hands I lose my life you Powers above look down and help me I am faulty I confess but greater faults have often met with lighter punishments Then let not heavier yet on me be laid Be what I will I am still what you have made Enter Don John Io. I 'm almost dead with running and will be so quite but I will overtake her 1. Const. Hold Don Iohn hold Io. Who 's that Ha is it you my Dear 1. Const. For Heaven's sake Sir carry me from hence or I 'm utterly undone Io. Phoo poxâ— this is th' other now could I almost beat her for but making me the Proposition Madam there are some a coming that will do it a great deal better but I am in such haste that I vow to Gad Madam 1. Const. Nay pray Sir stay you are concern'd in this as well as I for your Woman is taken Io. Ha! my Woman Goes back to her I vow to Gad Madam I do so highly honor your Ladyshp that I would venture my life a thousand times to do you Service But pray where is she 1. Const. Why Sir she is taken by the Constable Io. Constable which way went he Rashly 1. Const. I cannot tell for I run out into the Streets just as he had seiz'd upon your Landlady Io. Plague o' my Landlady I meant t'other Woman 1. Const. Other Woman Sir I have seen no other Woman never since I left your house Io. 'S heart what have I been doing here then all this while Madam your most humble 1. Const. Good Sir be not so cruel as to leave me in this distress Io. No no no I 'm only going a little way and will be back again presently 1. Const. But pray Sir hear me I 'm in that danger Io. No no no I vow to Gad Madam no danger i' the World let me alone I warrant you Exit 1. Const. He 's gone and I a lost wretched miserable Creature lost for ever Enter Antonio Ant. O there she is 1. Const. Who 's this Antonio the fiercest Enemy I have Runs out Ant. Are ye so nimble-footed Gentlewoman If I don't overtake you for all this it shall go hard She 'll break my wind with a pox to her A plague confound all Whores Exit SCENE III. Enter Mother to the second Constantia and Kinswoman Kins But Madam be not so angry perhaps sâ—e'll come again Mot. O Kinswoâ—an never speak of her more for she s an odious Creature to leave me thus i' th' lurch I that have given her all her breeding and instructed her with my own Principlâ—s of Education Kins Protest Madam I think she 's a Person that knows as much of all that as Mot. Knows Kinswoman There 's ne'r a Woman in Italy of thrice her years knows so much the procedures of a true gallantry and the infâ—llible Principles of an honourable friendship as she does Kins And therefore Madam you ought to love her Mot. No fie upon her nothing at all as I am a Christian when once a Person fails in Fundamentals she 's at a period with me Besides with all her wit Constantia is but a Fool and calls all the Meniarderies of a bonne mine affectation Kins Indeed I must confess she 's given a little too much to the careless wayâ— Mot. Ay there you have hit it Kinswoman the careless way has quite undone her Will ye believe me Kinswoman as I am a Christian I never could make her do this nor carry her body thus but just when my eye was upon her as soon as ever my back was turn'd whip her elbows were quite out again would not you strange now at this Kins Bless me sweet goodness But pray Madam how came Constantia to fall out with your Ladiship Did she take any thing ill of you Mot. As I 'm a Christian I can't resolve you unless it were that I led the dance first but for that she must excuse me I know she dances well but there are others who perhaps understand the right swim of it as well as she Enter Don Frederick And though I love Constantia Fred. How 's this Constantia Mot. I know no reason why I should be debarr'd the priviledge of shewing my own parts too sometimes Fred. If I am not mistaken that other Woman is she Don Iohn and I were directed to when we came first to Town to bring us acquainted with Constantia I 'll try to get some Intelligence from her Pray Lady have I never seen you before Kins Yes Sir I think you have with another Stranger a Friend of yours one day as I was coming out of the Church Fred. I 'm right then And pray who were you talking of Mot. Why Sir of an inconsiderate inconsiderable Person that has at once both forfeited the honor of my concern and the concern of her own honor Fred. Very fine indeed And is all this intended for the beautiful Constantia Mot. O fie upon her Sir an odious Creature as I 'm a Christian no Beauty at all Fred. Why does not your Ladiship think her handsome Mot. Seriously Sir I don't think she 's ugly but as I 'm a Christian my Position is That no true Beauty can be lodg'd in that Creature who is not in some measure buoy'd up with a just sence of what is incumbent to the devoir of a Person of Quality Fred. That Position Madam is a little severe but however she has been incumbent formerly as your Ladyship is pleas'd to say now that she 's marry'd and her Husband owns the Child she is sufficiently justifi'd for all she has done Mot. Sir I must blushingly beg leave to say you are there in an error I know there has been passages of love between 'em but with a temperament so innocent and so refin'd as it did impose a negative upon the very possibility of her being with Child Fred. Sure she is not well acquainted with her Pray Madam how long have you known Constantia Mot. Long enough I think Sir for I had the good fortune or rather the ill one to help her first to the light of the World Fred. Now cannot I discover by the fineness of this Dialect whether she be the Mother or the Midwife I had best ask t'other Woman Mot. No Sir I assure you my Daughter Constantia has never had a Child a Child ha ha ha O goodness save us a Child Fred. O then she is the Mother and it seems is not inform'd of the matter Well Madam I shall not dispute this with you any further but give me leave to wait upon you to your Daughter for her Friend I assure ye is in great impatience to see her Mot. Friend Sir I know none she has I 'm sure she loaths the very sight of him Fred. Of whom Mot. Why of Antonio Sir he that you were pleas'd to say had got my Daughter with Child Sir ha ha ha Fred.
grant it may Exeunt SCENE III. Enter Petruchio with a Letter Petr. This man should be of Quality and worth By Don Alvaras Letter for he gives No slight recommendations of him I le e'en make use of him Enter Don John Io. Save ye Sir I am sorry My business was so unmannerly to make ye Wait thus long here Petr. Occasions must be serv'd Sir But is your name Don Iohn Io. It is Sir Petr. Then First for your own brave sake I must embrace ye Next for the credit of your noble Friend Hernanda de Alvara make ye mine Who lays his charge upon me in this Letter To look ye out and Whil'st your occasions make you resident In this place to supply ye love and honor ye Which had I known sooner Io. Noble Sir You 'll make my thanks too poor I wear a Sword Sir And have a Service to be still dispos'd of As you shall please command it Petr. That manly curtesie is half my business Sir And to be short to make ye know I honor ye And in all points believe your worth like Oracle This day Petruchio A man that may command the strength of this place Hazard the boldest Spirits hath made choice Only of you and in a noble Office Io. Forward I am free to entertain it Petr. Thus then I do beseech ye mark me Io. I shall Sir Petr. Ferrara's Duke would I might call him worthy But that he has raz'd out from his Family As he has mine with Infamy This man Rather this powerful Monster we being left But two of all our House to stock our Memoires My Sister Constantia and my self with Arts and Witchcrafts Vows and such Oaths Heaven has no mercy for Drew to dishonour this weak Maid by stealth And secret passages I knew not of Oft he obtain'd his wishes oft abus'd her I am asham'd to say the rest This purchas'd And his hot blood allay'd he left her And all our Name to ruine Io. This was foul play And ought to be rewarded so Petr. I hope so He scap'd me yesternight Which if he dare again adventure for Io. Pray Sir what Commands have you to lay on me Petr. Only thus by word of mouth to carry him A Challenge from meâ— that so if he have honor in him We may decide all difference between us Io. Fair and noble And I will do it home when shall I visit â—e Petr. Please you this afternoon I will â—â—de with ye For at a Castle six mile hence we are sure To find him Io. I 'll be ready Petr. My man shall Wait here to conduct ye to my House Io. I shall not fail ye Sir Exit Petruchio Enter Frederick Fred. How now Io. All 's well and better than thou could'st expect for this Wench here is certainly no Maid and I have hopes she is the same that our two curious Coxcombs have been so long a hunting after Fred. Why do ye hope so Io. Why because first she is no Maid and next because she 's handsome there are two Reasons for you now do you find out a third a better if you can For take this Frederick for a certain Rule since she loves the sport she 'll never give it over And therefore if we have good luck in time may fall to our shares Fred. Very pretty Reasons indeed But I thought you had known some particular that made you conclude this to be the Woman Io. Yes I know her name is Constantia Fred. That now is something but I cannot believe her dishonest for all this she has not one loose thought about her Io. It 's no matter she 's loose i' th' hilts by Heaven There has been stirring fumbling with Linnen Frederick Fred. There may be such a â—lip Io. And will be Frederick whil'st the old Game 's afoot I fear the Boy too will prove hers I took up Fred. Good circumstance may cure all this yet Io. There thou hit'st it Frederick come let 's walk in and comfort her that she is here is nothing yet suspected Anon I shall tell thee why her Brother came who by this light is a noble Fellow and what honor he has done to me a Stranger in calling me to serve him There be â—rons heating for some on my word Frederick Exeunt ACT III. SCENE I. Enter Landlady and Anthony Land COme Sir who is it keeps your Master Company Anth. I say to you Don Iohn Land I say what woman Anth. I say so too Land I say again I will know Anth. I say 't is fit you should Land And I tell thee he has a Woman here Anth. I tell thee 't is then the better for him Land Was ever Gentlewoman So frumpt off with a Fool well sawcy Sirrah I will know who it is and to what purpose I pay the Rent and I will know how my House Comes by these inflammations if this geer hold Best hang a sign-post up to tell the Signior's Here ye may have lewdness at livery Enter Frederick Anth. 'T would be a great ease to your age Fred. How Now Why what 's the matter Landlady Land What 's the matter Ye use me decently among ye Gentlemen Fred. Who has abus'd her you Sir Land Od's my witness I will not be thus treated that I will not Anth. I gave her no ill Language Land Thou liest lewdly Thou took'st me up at every word I spoke As I had been a Mawkin a â—â—irt Gillian And thou think'st because thou canst write and read Our Noses must be under thee Fred. Dare you Sirrah Anth. Let but the Truth be known Sir I beseech ye She raâ—es of Wenches and I know not what Sir Land Go to thou know'st too well thou wicked Varlet Thou Instrument of evil Anth. As I live Sir she 's ever thus till Dinner Fred. Get ye in I 'll answer you anon Sir Exit Anthony Now your grief what is 't For I can guess Land Ye may with shame enough If there were shame amongst ye nothing thought on But how ye may abuse my house not satisfied With bringing home your Bastards to undo me But you must drill your Whores here too my patience Because I bear and bear and carry all And as they say am willing to groan under Must be your make-sport now Fred. No more of these words Nor no more murmurings Lady for you know That I know something I did suspect your anger But turn it presently and handsomly And bear your self discreetly to this Woman For such a one there is indeed Land 'T is well Son Fred. Leave off your Devil's Matins and your Melancholies Or we shall leave our Lodgings Land You have mâ—ch need To use these vagrant ways and to much profit Ye had that might content At home within your selves too right good Gentlemen Wholesome and ye said handsome But you Gallants Beast that I was to believe ye Fred. Leave your suspition For as I live there 's no such thing Land Mine honor And ' twâ—re not for mine honor
till you have your desires and then you leave us Io. But my dear Heart I am not made like other men I never can love heartily till I have 2. Const. Got their Maidenheads but suppose now I should be no Maid Io. Prethee suppose me nothing but let me try 2. Const. Nay good Sir hold Io. No Maid why so much the better thou art then the more experienc'd for my part I hate a bungler at any thing 2. Const. O dear I like this Fellow strangely hark ye Sir I am not worth a groat but though you should not be so neither if you 'l but love me I 'll follow ye all the World over I 'll work for ye beg for you do any thing for ye so you 'll promise to do nothing with any body else Io. O Heavens I 'm in another World this Wench sure was made a purpose for me she is so just of my humour My dear 't is impossible for me to say how much I will do for thee or with thee thou sweet bewitching woman but let 's make haste home or I shall never be able to hold out till I come thither Exeunt SCENE III. Enter Frederick and Francisco Fred. And art thou sure it was Constantia say'st thou that he was leading Fran. Am I sure I live Sir why I dwelt in the house with her how can I chuse but know her Fred. But did'st thou see her face Fran. Lord Sir I saw her face as plainly as I see yours just now not two Streets off Fred. Yes 't is e'en so I suspected it at first but then he forswore it with that confidence Well Don Iohn if these be your practices you shall have no more a Friend of me Sir I assure you Perhaps though he met her by chance and intends to carry her to her Brother and the Duke Enter Don John and Second Constantia A little time will shew Gods so here he is I 'll step behind this Shop and observe what he say's Io. Here now go in and make me for ever happy Fred. Dear Don Iohn Io. A pox o' your kindness how the Devil comes he here just at tâ—â—s time Now will he ask me forty foolish Questions and I have such a mind to this Wench that I cannot think of one excuse for my life Fred. Your Servant Sir pray who 's that you lock'd in just now at that door Io. Why a Friend of mine that 's gone up to read a Book Fred. A Book that 's a queint one i'faith prethee Don Iohn what Library hast thou been buying this Afternoon for i' th' Morning to my knowledge thou had'st never a Book there except it were an Almanack and that was none of thy own neither Io. No no it 's a Book of his own he brought along with him A Scholar that is given to reading Fred. And do Scholars Don Iohn wear Petticoats now adays Io. Plague on him he has seen her Well Don Frederick thou know'st I am not good at lying 't is a Woman I confess it make your best on 't what then Fred. Why then Don Iohn I desire you 'll be pleas'd to let me see her Io. Why faith Frederick I should not be against the thing but ye know a man must keep his word and she has a mind to be private Fred. But Iohn you may remember when I met a Lady so before this very self same Lady too that I got leave for you to see her Iohn Io. Why do ye think then that this here is Constantia Fred. I cannot properly say I think it Iohn because I know it this Fellow here saw her as you led her i' th' Streets Io. Well and what then who does he say it is Fred. Ask him Sir and he 'll tell ye Io. Sweet heart dost thou know this Lady Fran. I think I should Sir I ha' liv'd long enough in the House with her to know her sure Io. And how do they call her prethee Fran. Constantia Io. How Constantia Fran. Yes Sir the Woman's name is Constantia that 's flat Io. Is it so Sir and so is this too Strikes him Fran. Oh Oh. Runs out Io. Now Sirrah you may safely say you have not born false witness for nothing Fred. Fie Don Iohn why do you beat the poor Fellow for doing his Duty and telling truth Io. Telling truth thou talk'st as if thou had'st been hir'd to bear false witness too ye are a very fine Gentleman Fred. What a strange confidence he has But is there no shame in thee nor no consideration of what is just or honest to keep a Woman thus against her will that thou know'st is in love with another man too do'st think a Judgment will not follow this Io. Good dear Frederick do thou keep thy Sentences and thy Morals for some better opportunity this here is not a fit Subject for 'em I tell thee she is no more Constantia than thou art Fred. Why won't you let me see her then Io. Because I can't besides she is not for thy turn Fred. How so Io. Why thy Genius lies another way thou art for flames and darts and those fine things now I am for the old plain down-right way I am not so curious Frederick as thou art Fred. Very well Sir but is this worthy in you to endeavour to debauch Io. But it there no shame but is this worthy what a many buts are here If I should tell thee now solemnly thou hast but one eye and give thee reasons for it would'st thou believe me Fred. I think hardly Sir against my own knowledg Io. Then why dost thou with that grave face go about to perswade me against mine You should do as you would be done by Frederick Fred. And so I will Sir in this very particular since there 's no other remedy I shall do that for the Duke and Petruchio which I should expect from them upon the like occasion in short to let you see I am as sensible of my honour as you can be careless of yours I must tell ye Sir that I 'm resolv'd to wait upon this Lady to them Io. Are ye so Sir Why I must then sweet Sir tell you again I am resolved you shan't Ne'r stare nor wonder I have promis'd to preserve ner from the sight of any one whatsoever and with the hazard of my life will make it good but that you may not think I mean an injury to Peâ—ruchio or the Duke know Don Frederick that though I love a Wench perhaps a little better I hate to do a thing that 's base as much as you do Once more upon my honor this is not Constantia let that satisfie you Fred. All that will not do Goes to the Door Io. No why then this shall Draws Come not one step nearer â—or if thou do'st by Heaven it is thy last Fred. This is an insolence beyond the temper of a man to suffer thus I throw off thy friendship and since thy folly has provok'd my patience beyond its
natural bounds know it is not in thy power now to save thy self Io. That 's to be try'd Sir though by your favour Looks up to the window Mistress what you call 'em prethee look out now a little and see how I 'll fight for thee Fred. Come Sir are you ready Io. O Lord Sir your Servant Fight SCENE IV. Enter Duke and Petruchio Petr. What 's here fighting let 's part ' em How Don Frederick against Don Iohn how came you to fall out Gentlemen What 's the Cause Fred. Why Sir it is your quarrel and not mine that drew this on meâ— I saw him lock Constantia up into that house and I desir'd to wait upon her to you that 's the Cause Duke O it may be he design'd to lay the obligation upon us himself Sir we are beholden to you for this favour beyond all possibility of Io. Pray Sir do not throw away your thanks before you know whether I have deserv'd 'em or no. O is that your design Sir you must not go in there Petruchio 's going to the Door Petr. How Sir not go in Io. No Sir most certainly not go in Petr. She 's my Sister and I will speak with her Io. If she were your Mother Sir you should not though it were but to ask her blessing Petr. Since you are so positive I 'll try Io. You Shall find me a man of my word Sir Fight Duke Nay pray Gentlemen hold let me compose this matter â—hy do you make a scruple of letting us see Constantia Io. Why Sir 't would turn a man's head round to hear these Fellows talk so there is not one word true of all that he has said Duke Then you do not know where Constantia is Io. Not I by Heavens Fred. O monstrous Impudence upon my life Sir I saw him shut her up into that house and know his temper so that if I had not stop'd him I dare swear hy this time he would have ravish'd her Io. Now that is two Lies for first he did not see her aâ—d next the Lady I led in is not to be ravish'd she is so willing Duke But look ye Sir this doubt may easily be clear'd let either Petruchio or I but see her and if she be not Constantia we engage our Honors though we should know her never to discover who she is Io. I but there 's the point now that I can ne'r consent to Duke Why Io. Because I gave her my word to the contrary Duke And did you never break your word with a Woman Io. Never before I lay wiâ—h her and that 's the case now Petr. Pish I won't be kept off thus any longer Sir either let me enter or I 'll force my way Fred. No pray Sir let that be my Office I will be reveng'd on him for having betray'd me to his friendship Petruchio and Frederick offer to fight with John Duke Nay ye shall not offer him foul play neither Hold Brother pray a word and with you too Sir Io. Pox on 't would they would make an end of this business that I might be with her again Hark ye Gentlemen I 'll make ye a fair Proposition leave off this Ceremony among your selves and those dismal threats against me phillip up cross or pile who shall begin first and I 'll do the best I can to entertain ye all one after another Enter Antonio Ant. Now do my fingers itch to be about some bodies ears for the loâ—s of my Gold Ha! what 's here to do Swords drawn I must make one though it cost me the singing of ten Iohn Doryes more Courage brave Boy I 'll stand by thee as long as this Tool here lasts and it was once a good one Petr. Who 's this Antonio O Sir you are welcome you shall be e'en Judge between us Ant. No no no not I Sir I thank ye I 'll make work for others to judge of I 'm resolv'd to fight Pâ—tr But we wo'n't fight with you Ant. Then put up your Swords or by this hand I 'll lay about me Io. Well said old Bilbo i'faith They put up their Swordâ— Petr. Pray hear us though this Gentleman saw him lock up my Sister into that house and he refuses to let us see her Ant. How Friend Is this true Io. Nay good Sir let not our friendship be broken before it is well made Look ye Gentlemen to shew ye that you are all mistaken and that my formal Friend there is an Ass. Fred. I thank you Sir Io. I 'll give my consent that this Gentleman here shall see her if his information can satisfie you Duke Yes yes he knows her very well Io. Then Sir go in here if you please I dare trust him with her for he is too old to do her either good or harm Fred. I wonder how my Gentleman will get off from all this Io. I shall be even with you Sir another time for all your grinning Enter a Servant How now where is he Ser. He 's run out o' the back door Sir Io. How so Ser. Why Sir he 's ran after the Gentlewoman you brought in Io. 'S death how durst you let her out Ser. Why Sir I knew nothing Io. No thou ignorant Rascal and therefore I 'll beat something into thee Beats him Fred. What you won't kill him Io. Nay come not near me for if thou doâ—t by Heavens I 'll give thee as much and would do so however but that I won't lose time from looking after my dear Sweet a pox confound you all Goes in and shuts the Door after him Duke What he has shut the Door Fred. It 's no matter I 'll lead you to a private backway by that corner where we shall meet him Exâ—unt ACT V. SCENE I. Enter Antonio 's Servant Constables and Officers Ser. A Young Woman say'st thou and her Mother Man Yes just now come to the house Not an hour ago Ser. It must be they here Friend here 's money for you be sure you take 'em and I 'll reward you better when you have done Const. But Neighbour how hup shall I now hup know these these Parties for I would hup execute my Office hup like hup a sober Person Man That 's hard but you may easily know the Mother for she is hup drunk Const. Nay hup if she be drunk let hup me alone to maul her for hup I abhor a Drunkard hup let it be man Woman or hup Child Man Ay Neighbour one may see you hate drinking indeed Const. Why Neighbour hup did you ever see me drunk answer me that Question did you ever hup see me drunk Man No never never come away here 's the house Exeunt SCENE II. Enter 1. Constantia 1. Const. Oh whither shall I run to hide my self The Constable has seiz'd the Landlady and I 'm afraid the poor Child too How to return to Don Frederick's house I know not and if I knew I durst not after those things the Landlady has told me of
SCENE VIII Enter Petruchio Antonio and two Gentlemen Pet. He will sure come Are ye all well arm'd An. Never fear us Here 's that will make 'em dance without a fiddle Pet We are to look for no weak Foes my Friends Nor unadvised ones An. Best Gamesters make the best Play We shall fight close and home then 1. Gent. Antonio You are a thought too bloody An. Why all Physicians And penny Almanacks allow the opening Of Veins this Month Why do ye talk of bloody What come we for to fall to cuffs for apples What would you make the Cause a Cudgel-Quarrel Pet. Speak softly gentle Cosin An. I will speak trulyâ— What should men do ally'd to these Disgraces Lick o're his Enemy sit down and dance him 2. Gent. You are as far o' th' Bow Hand now An. And try That 's my fine Boy thou wilt do so no more Child Pet. Here are no such cold pities An. By St. Iaques They shall not find me one Here 's old tough Andrew A special Friend of mine and he but hold I 'll strike 'em such a Horn-pipe knocks I come for And the best blood I light on I profess it Not to scare Costermongers if I lose my own My audit's lost and farwell five and fifty Pet. Let 's talk no longer place your selves with silence As I directed ye and when time calls us As ye are Friends so shew your selves An. So be it Exeunt SCENE IX Enter Don John and his Land-Lady Land Nay Son if this be your regard Io. Good Mother Land Good me no goods your Cousin and your self Are welcome to me whilst you bear your selves Like honest and true Gentlemen Bring hither To my House that have ever been reputed A Gentlewoman of a decent and a fair Carriage And so behaved my self Io. I know you have Land Bring hither as I say to make my Name Stink in my Neighbours Nostrils Your devices Your Brats got out of Alligant and broken Oaths Your Linsey-wolsey work your Hasty-Puddings I foster up your filtch'd Iniquities Y' are deceived in me Sir I am none Of those receivers Io. Have I not sworn unto you 'T is none of mine and shew'd you how I found it Land Ye found an easie fool that let you get it Io. Will you hear me Land Oaths What care you for Oaths to gain your ends When ye are high and pamper'd What Saint know ye Or what Religion but your purpos'd lewdness Is to be look'd for of ye nay I will tell ye You will then swear like accus'd Cut-purses As far off truth too and lye beyond all Falconers I 'm sick to see this dealing Io. Heaven forbid Mother Land Nay I am very sick Io. Who waits there Pet. Sir Within Io. Bring down the Bottle of Canary Wine Land Exceeding sick Heaven help me Io. Haste ye sirrah I must e'en make her drunk nay gentle Mother Land Now â—ie upon ye was it for this purpose You fetch'd your Evening walks for your Devotions For this pretended holiness no weather Not before day could hold ye from the Mattins Were these your bo-peep Prayers y 'ave pray'd well And with a learned Zeal watch'd well too your Saint It seems was pleas'd as well Still sicker sicker Enter Peter with a Bottle of Wine Io. There is no talking to her till I have drench'd her Give me Here Mother take a good round draught 'T will purge Spleen from your Spirits deeper Mother Land I I Son you imagine this will mend all Io. All I faith Mother Land I confess the Wine Will do his part Io. I 'll pledge ye Land But Son Iohn Io. I know your meaning Mother touch it once more Alas you look not well take a round draught It warms the blood well and restores the colour And then we 'll talk at large Land A civil Gentleman A stranger one the Town holds a good regard of Io. Nay I will silence thee there Land One that should weigh his fair name oh a Stitch Io. There 's nothing better for a stitch good Mother Make no spare of it as you love your health Mince not the matter Land As I said a Gentleman Lodge in my House now Heaven 's my comfort Signior Io. I look'd for this Land I did not think you would have us'd me thusâ— A woman of my credit one heaven knows That loves you but too tenderly Io. Dear Mother I ever found your kindness and acknowledg it Land No no I am a fool to counsel ye Where 's the Infant Come let 's see your workmanship Io. None of mine Mother But there 't is and a lusty one Land Heav'n bless thee Thou hadst a hasty making but the best is 'T is many a good man's fortune as I live Your own eyes Signior and the nether Lip As like ye as ye had spit it Io. I am glad on 't Land Bless me what things are these Io. I thought my labour Was not all lost 't is Gold and these are Jewels Both rich and right I hope Land Well well Son Iohn I see yâ—'re a Wood man and can chuse Yoar Deer though it be i' th' dark all your discretion Is not yet lost this was well clap'd aboard Here I am with ye now when as they say Your pleasure comes with proâ—it when you must needs do Do where you may be done to 't is a wisdom Becomes a young man well be sure of one thing Lose not your Labour and your time together It seasons of a Fool Son time is precious Work wary whilst you have it since you must traffick Sometimes this slippery way take sure hold Signior Trade with no broken Merchants make your Lading As you would make your rest adventurously But with advantage ever Io. All this time Mother The Child wants looking to wants meat and Nurses Land Now blessing o' thy heart it shall have all And instantly I 'l seek a Nurse my self Son 'T is a sweet Child ah my young Spaniard Take you no further care Sir Io. Yes of these Jewels I must by your good leave Mother these are yours To make your care the stronger for the rest I 'l find a Master the gold for bringing up on 't I freely render to your charge Land No more words Nor no more Children good Son as you love me This may do well Io. I shall observe your Morals But where 's Don Fredrick Mother Land Ten to oâ—e About the like adventure he told me He was to find you out Exit Io. Why should he stay thus There may be some ill chance in 't Sleep I will not Before I have found him now this Woman 's pleas'd I 'le seek my Friend out and my care is eas'd Exit SCENE X. Enter Duke and three Gentlemen 1. Gen. Believe Sir 't is as possible to do it As to remove the City the main Faction Swarm through the Streets like Hornets and with angers Able to ruine States no safety left us Nor means to die like men if instantly You
draw not back again Du. May he be drawn And quarter'd too that turnâ— now were I surer Of death than thou art of thy fears and with deaths More than those fears are too 1 Gen. Sir I fear not Du. I would not break my vow start from my honor Because I may find danger wound my Soul To keep my body safe 1 Gen. I speak not Sirâ— Out of a baseness to ye Du. No nor do not Out of a baseness leave me what is danger More than the weakness of our apprehensions A poor cold part o' th' Blood who takes it hold of Cowards and wicked livers valiant minds Were made the Masters of it and as hearty Sea-men In desperate storms stem with a little Rudder The tumbling ruins of the Ocean So with their cause and Swords do they do dangers Say we were sure to die all in this venture As I am confident against it is there any Amongst us of so fat a sense so pamper'd Woulâ— chose luxuriously to ly abed And purge away his Spirit send his Soul out In Sugar-sops and Syrops give me dying As dying ought to be upon mine enemy Parting with mankind by a man that 's manly Let 'em be all the world and bring along Cain's Envy with 'em I will on 2 Gen. You may Sir But with what safety 1 Gen. Since 't is come to dying You shall perceive Sir that here be those amongst us Can die as decently as other men And with as little Ceremony On brave Sir Du. That 's spoken heartily 1 Gen. And he that flinches May he die louzy in a ditch Du. No more dying There 's no such danger in 't What 's a clock 3 Gen. Somewhat above your hour Du. Away then quickly Make no noise and no trouble wâ—ll attend us Exeunt SCENE XI Enter Frederick and Anthony with a Candle Fre. Give me the Candle So go you out that way An. What have we now to do Fre. And o' your life sirrah Let none come near the door without my knowledge No not my Landlady nor my Friend An. 'T is done Sir Fre. Nor any serious business that concerns me An. Is the wind there again Fre. Be gone An. I am Sir Exit Fre. Now enter without fear Enter 1. Constantia with a Iewel And noble Lady That safety and civility ye wish'd for Shall truly here attend you no rude tongue Nor rough behaviour knows this place no wishes Beyond the moderation of a man Dare enter here your own desires and innocence Joyn'd to my vow'd obedience shall protect ye Con. Ye are truly noble And worth a womans trust let it become me I do beseech you Sir for all your kindness To render with my thanks this worthless trifle I may be longer troublesome Fre. Fair Offices Are still their own rewards Heaven bless me Lady From selling civil courtesies may it please ye If ye will force a favour to oblige me Draw but that Cloud aside to satisfie me For what good Angel I am engag'd Con. It shall be For I am truly confident ye are honest The piece is scarce worth looking on Fre. Trust me The abstract of all beauty soul of sweetness Defend me honest thoughts I shall grow wild else What eyes are there rather what little Heavens To stir mens contemplations what a Paradise Runs through each part she has Good Blood be temperate I must look off too excellent an object Confounds the Sense that sees it Noble Lady If there be any further service to cast on me Let it be worth my life so much I honour ye Or the engagement of whole Families Con. Your service is too liberal worthy Sir Thus far I shall intreat Fre. Command me Lady You make your power too poor Con. That presently With all convenient hast you would retire Unto the Street you found me in Fre. 'T is done Con. There if you find a Gentleman opprest With force and violence do a mans office And draw your Sword to rescue him Fre. He 's safe Be what he will and let his Foes be Devils Arm'd with your beauty I shall conjure ' em Retire this Key will guide ye all things necessary Are there before ye Con. All my prayers go with ye Exit Fre. Ye clap on proof upon me men say Gold Does all engages all works through all dangers Now I say beauty can do more The King's Exchequer Nor all his wealthy Indies could not draw me Through half those miseries this piece of pleasure Might make me leap into we are all like Sea-Cards All our endeavours and our motions As they do to the North still point at beauty Still at the fairest for a handsom Woman Setting my soul aside it should go hard But I would strain my body yet to her Unless it be her own free gratitude Hopes ye shall dye and thou tongue rot within me E're I infringe my faith now to my rescue Exit ACT II. SCENE I. Enter Duke pursu'd by Petruchio Antonio and that Faction Duke YOu will not all oppress me An. Kill him i' th' wanton eye Let me come to him Duke Then you shall buy me dearly Petr. Say you so Sir An. I say cut his Wezand spoil his peeping Have at your love-sick heart Sir Enter Don John Io. Sure 't is fighting My Friend may be engag'd Fie Gentlemen This is unmanly odds Duke falls Don Johâ— bestrides him An. I 'll stop your mouth Sir Io. Nay then have at thee freely There 's a Plumb Sir to satisfie your longing Petr. Away I hope I have sped him here comes rescueâ— We shall be endanger'd where 's Antonio An. I must have one thrust more Sir Io. Come up to me An. A mischief confound your fingers Petr. How is it An. Well ' Has given me my Quietus est I felt him In my small guts I 'm sure ' has feez'd me This comes of siding with you 2 Gent. Can you go Sir An. I should go man and my head were off Never talk of going Petr. Come all shall be well then Trampling within I hear more rescue coming Enter the Duke 's Faction An. Let 's turn back then My scull's uncloven yet let me but kill Peter Away for heaven's sake with him Io. How is it Duke Well Sir Only a little stagger'd Du. Fact Let 's pursue ' em Duke No not a man I charge ye thank 's good Coat Thou hast sav'd me a shrew'd welcome 't was put home too With a good mind I 'm sure on 't Io. Are you safe then Duke My thanks to you brave Sir whose timely valour And manly courtesie came to my rescue Io. Ye had foul play offer'd ye and shame befall him That can pass by oppression Duke May I crave Sir But thus much honor more to know your name And him I am so bound to Io. For the Bond Sir 'T is every good man's tye to know me further Will little profit ye I am a stranger My Country Spain my name Don Iohn a Gentleman That came abroad to
Fred. Come your honor Your house and you too if you dare believe me Are well enough Sleek up your self leave crying For I must have ye entertain this Lady With all civility she well deserves it Together with all service I dare trust ye For I have found ye faithful when you know her You will find your own fault no more words but do it Land You know you may command me Enter Don John Io. Worshipful Lady How does thy Velvet Scabbard by this hand Thou lookest most amiably now could I willingly And 't were not for abusing thy Geneva print there Venture my Body with thee Land You 'll leave this roperyâ— When ye come to my years Io. By this light Thou art not above fifteen yet a meer Girle Thou hast not half thy teeth Fre. Prethee Iohn Let her alone she has been vext already She 'l grow stark mad man Io. I wou'd fain see her mad An old mad Woman Fre. Prethee be patient Io. Is like a Millers Mare troubled wi'th ' Tooth ache She makes the rarest faces Fre. Go and do it And do not mind this fellow Exit Landlady and comes back again presently Io. What agen Nay then it is decreed though hills were set on hills And Seas met Seas to guard thee I would through Land Od's my witness if ye ruffle me I 'l spoil your sweet face for you that I will Go go to the door there 's a Gentleman there would speak with ye Io. Upon my life Petruchio good dear Landlady carry him into the dining-Room and I 'll wait upon him presently Land Well Don Iohn the time will come that I shall be even with you Exit Io. I must be gone yet if my project hold You shall not stay behind I 'l rather trust A Cat with sweet milk Frederick by her face Enter Constantia I feel her fears are working Con. Is there no way I do beseech ye think yet to divert This certain danger Fre. 'T is impossible Their Honors are engag'd Con. Then there must be murder Which Gentlemen I shall no sooner hear of Then make one in 't you may if you please Sir Make all go less Io. Lady wer 't mine own cause I could dispence but loaden with my Friends trust I must go on though general Massacrees As much I fear Con. Do ye hear Sir for Heavens sake Let me request one favour of you Fre. Yes any thing Con. This Gentleman I find is too resolute Too hot and fiery for the cause as ever You did a virtuous deed for honor's sake Go with him and allay him your fair temper And noble disposition like wish'd showers May quench those eating fires that would spoil all elseâ— I see in him destruction I will do it Fre. And 't is a wise consideration To me a bounteous favour Hark ye Iohn I will go with ye Io. No. Fre. Indeed I will Ye go upon a hazard no denyal For as I live I 'll go Io. Then make ye ready For I am strait a Horse-back Fre. My Sword on and I am as ready as youâ— what my blest Labour With all the art I have can work upon 'em Be sure of and expect fair end the old Gentlewoman Shall wait upon ye she is discreet and secret Ye may trust her in all points Con. Ye are noble And so I take my leave Io. I hope Lady a happy issue for all thisâ— Const. All Heavens care upon ye and my prayers Io. So Now my mind 's at rest Fred. Away 't is late Iohn Exeunâ— SCENE II. Enter Antonio Surgeon and a Gentleman Gent. What Symptoms do ye find in him Sur. None Sir dangerous if he 'd be rul'd Gent. Why what does he do Sur. Nothing that he should First he will let no Liquor down but Wine and then he has a fancy that he must be drest always to the Tune of Iohn Dory Gent. How to the Tune of Iohn Dory Sur. Why he will have Fidlers and make them play and sing it to him all the while Gent. An odd fancy indeed Ant. Give me some Wine Sâ—r. I told you so 'T is Death Sir Ant. 'T is a Horse Sir Dost think I shall recover with the help oâ— Barley water only Gent. Fie Antonio you must be govern'd Ant. Why Sir he feeds me with nothing but rotten Roots and drown'd Chickens stew'd Pericraniums and Piâ—-maters and when I go to bed by Heaven 't is true Sir he rowls me up in lints with Labels at 'em that I am just the man i' th' Almanack my head and face is Aries place Sur. Will 't please ye to let your Friends see you open'd Ant. Will 't please you Sir to give me a brimmer I feel my body open enough for that Give it me or I 'll die upon thy hand and spoil thy custom Sur. How a brimmer Ant. Why look ye Sir thus I am us'd stillâ— I can get nothing that I want In how long time canst thou cure me Sur. In forty days Ant. I 'll have a Dog shall lick me whole in twenty In how long canst thou kill me Sur. Presently Ant. Do 't that 's the shorter and there 's more delight in 't Gent. You must have patience Ant. Man I must have business this foolish Fellow hinders himself I have a dozen Rascals to hurt within these five days Good Man-mender stop me up with Parsley like stuff'd Beef and let me walk abroad Sur. Ye shall walk shortly Ant. I will walk presently Sir and leave your Salads there your green Salves and your Oyls I 'll to my old dyet again strong Food and rich Wine and try what that will do Sur. Well go thy ways thou art the maddest old fellow I e'r yet met with Exeunt SCENE III. Enter Constantia and Landlady Const. I have told ye all I can and more than yet Those Gentlemen know of me but are they Such strange Creatures say you Land There 's the younger Don Iohn the errant'st Iack in all this City The other time has blasted yet he will stoop If not o'rflown and freely on the Quarry H 'as been a Dragon in his days But Tarmont Don Ienkin is the Devil himself the dog-days The most incomprehensible Whoremaster Twenty a night is nothing the truth is Whose chastity he chops upon he cares not He flies at all Bastards upon my conscience He has now in making multitudes The last night He brought home one I pity her that bore it But we are all weak Vessels some rich Woman For wise I dare not call her was the Mother For it was hung with Jewels the bearing cloath No less than Crimson Velvet Const. How Land 'T is true Lady Const. Was it a Boy too Land A brave Boy deliberation And judgment shew'd in 's getting as I 'll say for him He 's as well pac'd for that sport Const. May I see it For there is a Neighbour of mine a Gentlewoman Has had a late mischance which willingly I would know further of now if you
please To be so courteous to me Land Ye shall see it But what do ye think of these men now ye know ' em Be wise Ye may repent too late else I but tell ye For your own good and as you will find it Lady Const. I am advis'd Land No more words then do that And instantly I told ye of be ready Don Iohn I ll fit ye for your frumps Const. I shall be But shall I see this Child Land Within this half hour Let 's in and there think better Exeunt SCENE IV. Enter Petruchio Don John Frederick Io. Sir he is worth your knowledge and a Gentleman If I that so much love him may commend him That 's full of honor and one if foul play Should fall upon us for which fear I brought him Will not fly back for phillips Petr. Ye much honor me And once more I pronounce ye both mine Fred. Stay what Troop Is that below i' th' Valley there Io. Hawking I take it Petr. They are so 't is the Duke 't is even he Gentlemen Sirrah draw back the Horses till we call ye I know him by his Company Fred. I think too He bends up this way Petr. So he does Io. Stand you still Within that covert till I call he comes Forward here will I wait him to your places Petr. I need no more instruct ye Io. Fear me not Exit Petruchio and Frederick Enter Duke and his Faction Duke Feed the Hawks up We 'll fly no more to day O my blest Fortune Have I so fairly met the man Io. Ye have Sir And him ye know by this Duke Sir all the honor And love Io. I do beseech your Grace stay there and Dismiss your Train a little Duke Walk aside And out of hearing I command ye now Sir Be plain Io. I will and short Ye have wrong'd a Gentleman beyond all Justice Beyond the Mediation of all Friends Duke The man and manner of wrong Io. Petruchio The wrong ye have dishonour'd his Sister Duke Now stay you Sir And hear me a little This Gentleman's Sister that you nam'd 't is true I have long lov'd As true I have enjoy'd her no less truth I have a Child by her But that she or he Or any of that Family are tainted Suffer disgrace or ruine by my pleasures I wear a Sword to satisfie the World no And him in this Cause when he pleases for know Sir She is my Wife contracted before Heaven Witness I owe more tie to than her Brother Nor will I fly from that Name which long since Had had the Churches approbation But for his Jealous Nature Io. Your pardon Sir I am fully satisfi'd Duke Dear Sir I knew I should convert ye had we But that rough man here now too Io. And ye shall Sir What hoa hoo Duke I hope ye â—ave laid no Ambush Enter Petruchio Io. Only Friends Duke My noble Brother welcome Come put your anger off we 'll have no fighting Unless you will maintain I am unworthy To bear that Name Petr. Do you speak this heartily Duke Upon my Soul and truly the first Priest Shall put you out of these doubts Petr. Now I love ye And I beseech ye pardon my suspicions You are now more than a Brother a brave Friend too Io. The good man 's over-joy'd Enter Frederick Fred. How now how goes it Io. Why the man has his Mare again and all 's well The Duke professes freely he 's her Husband Fred. 'T is a good hearing Io. Yes for modest Gentlemen I must present ye May it please your Grace To number this brave Gentleman my Friend And noble Kinsman amongst the rest of your Servants Duke O my brave Friend you shower your Bounties on me Amongst my best thoughts Signior in which number You being worthily dispos'd alreadyâ— May freely place your Friend Fred. Your Grace does me a great deal of honor Petr. Why this is wondrous happy But now Brother Now comes the bitter to our sweet Constantia Duke Why what of her Petr. Nor whatâ— nor where do I know Wing'd with her fears last night beyond my knowledge She quit my house but whither Fred. Let not that Duke No more good Sir I have heard too much Petr. Nay sink not She cannot be so lost Io. Nor shall not Gentlemen Be free again the Lady 's found that smile Sir Shews you distrust your Servant Duke I do beseech ye Io. Ye shall believe me by my Soul she 's safe Duke Heaven knows I would believe Sir Fred. Ye may safely Io. And under noble usage this Gentleman Mâ—t her in all her Doubts last night and to his Guard Her fears being strong upon her she gave her Person Who waited on her to our Lodging where all respect Civil and honest Service now attend her Petr. Ye may believe now Duke Yes I do and strongly Well my good Friends or rather my good Angels For ye have both preserv'd me when these virtues Die in your Friends remembrance Io. Good your Grace Lose no more time in Complements 't is too precious I know it by my self there can be no Hell To his that hangs upon his hopes Petr. He has hit it Fred. To Horse again then for this night I 'll crown With all the Joys ye wish for Peâ—r Happy Gentlemâ—n Enter Francisco and a Man Fran. This is the maddest mischief never Fool was so â—ub'd off as I am made ridiculous and to my self to my own Ass trust a Woman I 'll trust the Devil first for he dares be better than his word sometimes Pray tell me in what observance have I e'r fail'd her Man Nay you can tell that best your self Fran. Let me consider Enter Don Frederick and Don John Fred. Let them talk we 'll go on before Fran. Where did'st thou meet Constantia and this Woman Fred. Constantia what are these Fellows Stay by all means Man Why Sir I met her in the great Street that comes from the Market-place just at the turning by a Gold-smith's Shop Fred. Stand still Iohn Fran. Well Constantia has spun her self a fair thred now what will her best Friend think of this Fred. Iohn I smell some jugling Iohn Io. Yes Frederick I fear it will be prov'd so Fran. But what should the reason be dost think of this so suddain change in her Fred. 'T is she Man Why truly I suspect she has been entiâ—'d to it by a Stranger Io. Did you mark that Frederick Fran. Stranger who Man A young Gentlâ—man that 's newly come to Town Fred. Mark that too Io. Yes Sir Fran. Why do you think so Man I heard her grave Conductress twattle something as they went along that makes me guess it Io. 'T is she Frederick Fred. But who that he is Iohn Fran. I do not doubt to bolt 'em out for they must certainly be about the Town Ha! no more words come let 's be gone Exeunâ— Fran. and Man Fred. Well Io. Very well Fred. Discreetly Io. Finely carri'd Fred. Ye have no
Still worse and worse ' Slife cannot she be content with not letting me understand her but must also resolve obstinately not to understand me because I speak plain Why Madamâ— I cannot express my self your way therefore be not offended at me for it I tell you I do not know Antonio nor never nam'd him to you I told you that the Duke has own'd Constantia for his Wife that her Brother and he are Friends and are both now in search after her Mot. Then as I 'm a Christian I suspect we have both been equally involv'd in the misfortune of a mistake Sir I am in the derniere confusion to avow that though my Daughter Constantia has been lyable to several addresses yet she never has had the honour to be produc'd to his Grace Fred. So then you put her to bed to Mo. Antonio Sir one whom my ebb of fortune forc'd me to enter into a negotiation with in reference to my Daughter's Person but as I 'm a Christian with that candor in the action as I was in no kind deny'd to be a witness of the thing Fred. So now the thing is out This is a damn'd Bawd and I as damn'd a Rogue for what I did to Don Iohn for o' my conscience this is that Constantia the Fellow told me of I 'll make him amends what e'r it cost me Lady you must give me leave not to part with you till you meet with your Daughter for some reasons I shall tell you hereafter Mot. Sir I am so highly your Obligee for the manner of your Enquiries and you have grounded your Determinations upon so just a Basis that I shall not be asham'd to own my self a Votary to all your Commands Exeunt SCENE IV. Enter second Constantia 2. Const. So I 'm once more freed from Antonio but whither to go now there 's the question nothing troubles me but that he was sent up by that young Fellow for I lik'd him with my Soul would he had lik'd me so too Enter Don John and a Shopkeeper Io. Which way went she Shop Who Io. The Woman Shop What Woman Io. Why a young Woman a handsome Woman the handsomest Woman thou ever saw'st in thy life speak quickly Sirrah or thou shalt speak no more Shop Why yonder 's a Woman what a Devil ayls this Fellow Exit Io. O my dear Soul take pity o' me and give me comfort for I 'm e'en dead for want of theeâ— 2. Const. O you 're a fine Gentleman indeed to shut me up in your house and send another man to me Io. Pray hear me 2. Const. No I will never hear you more after such an Injury what would ye have done if I had been kind to ye that could use me thus beâ—ore Io. By my troâ—h that 's shrewdly urg'd 2. Const. Besides you basely broke your word Io. But will ye hear nothing nor did you hear nothing I had three men upon me at once and had I not consented to let that old Fellow up who came to my rescue they had all broken in whether I would or no. 2. Const. Faith it may be it was so for I remember I heard a noiseâ— but suppose it was not so what then why then I 'll love him however Hark ye Sir I ought now to use you very scurvily but I can't find in my heart to do it Io. Then God's blessing on thy heart for it 2. Const. But a Io. What 2. Const. I would fain Io. I so would I come let 's go 2. Const. I would fain know whether you can be kind to me Io. That thou shalt presently come away 2. Const. And will you always Io. Always I can't say so but I will as often as I can 2. Const. Phoo I mean love me Io. Well I mean that too 2. Const. Swear then Io. That I will upon my knees what shall I say 2. Const. Nay use what words you please so they be but hearty and not those are spoken by the Priest for that charm seldome proves fortunate Io. I swear then by thy fair self that look'st so like a Deity and art the only thing I now can think of that I 'll adore thee to my dying day 2. Const. And here I vow the minute thou do'st leave me I 'll leave the World that 's kill my self Io. O my dear heavenly Creature Kisses her That kiss now has almost put me into a swoon for Heaven's sake let 's quickly out of the Streets for fear of another sâ—uffle I durst encounter a whole Army for thy sake but yet methinks I had better try my courage another way what think'st thou 2. Const. Well well why don't you go then As they are going out Enter 1. Constantia and just then Antonio seizes upon her Io. Who 's this my old new Friend has got there Ant. O have I caught you Gentlewoman at last Come give me my Gold 1. Const. I hope he takes me for another I won't answer for I had rather he should take me for any one than who I am Io. Pray Sir who is that you have there by the hand Ant. A Person of Honor Sir that has broke open my Trunks and run away with all my Gold yet I 'll hold ten pound I 'll have it whip'd out of her again 2. Const. Done I 'll hold you ten pounds of that now Ant. Ha! by my troth you have reason and Lady I ask you pardon but I 'll have it whip'd out of you then Gossip Io. Hold Sir you must not meddle with my Goods Ant. Your Goods how came she to be yours I 'm sure I bought her of her Mother for five hundred good pieces in Gold and she was abed with me all night too deny that if you dare 2. Const. Well and what did you do when I was abed with you all night confess that if you dare Ant. Umh say you so 1. Const. I 'll try if this Lady will help me for I know not whither else to go Ant. I shall be sham'd I see utterly except I make her hold her peace Pray Sir by your leave I hope you will allow me the Speech of one word with your Goods here as you call her 't is but a small request Io. I Sir with all my heart How Constantia Madam now you have seen that Lady I hope you will pardon the haste you met me in a little while ago if I committed a fault you must thank her for it 1. Const. Sir if you will for her sake be perswaded to protect me from the violence of my Brother I shall have reason to thank you both Io. Nay Madam now that I am in my wits again and my heart 's at ease it shall go very hard but I will see yours so too I was before distracted and 't is not strange the love of her should hinder me from remembring what was due to you since it made me forget my self 1. Const. Sir I do know too well the power of Love by my own