Selected quad for the lemma: friend_n
Text snippets containing the quad
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A30312
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The reform'd wife a comedy, as it is acted at the Theatre-Royal in Drury Lane.
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Burnaby, William, 1672 or 3-1706.
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1700
(1700)
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Wing B5745; ESTC R7058
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43,057
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55
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every thing I do is lucky I am the most overjoy'd Man o' this side the Globe but you can't imagine what a sly Rogue the Captain has been in this Matter shall I tell him Tom Fre. No Prithee let it alone till after Supper Sir Sol. Ay you Dog your Thoughts ruâ— upon nothing but after Supper But Cleremont you 'll Dye with Laughing such Plots and Counterplots Harkee Tom not a word to the Women of our first Contrivance Fre. No no. Sir Sol. For if my Dearee shou'd but hear of so irreligious a purpose it wou'd break her Heart It seems she is one or other the most reserv'd most pious of such nice Honour and the fearfull'st Fool well I am the happiest Man in the World Fre. In a Wife Sir Sol. And next to my own Happiness I must Congratulate my Friends Dear Cleremont I 'm overjoy'd at thy good Fortune why thy Wife looks better already is it not possible to make her speak like one of us Cle. All things by Degrees Sir Solomon I must not over-dose her Sir Sol. Nothing pleases me so much as to think that all this happen'd thro' my Contrivance Tom Cleremont Fre. Thou art a great Man that 's certain Cle. For Intriguing Lad. Truly Madam I wonder how this Ill-bred Custom prevails among People of Figure This Singing this Dancing and this Tumult is so like the Mob Solemnities of a May-Day Huh! Huh! Huh! Clar. And the Bride is us'd just like their Pole for all the Town to Dance round Lad. Directly so well certainly if it were not for the Pleasure of ruling after no Woman of Quality wou'd suffer her self to be treated so like a Commoner Ast. The grosser part of the Ceremony is to come Madam and that is throwing the Stocking Clar. That indeed is a thing that insults us so near that I wonder the Men have not thought it their Interest to lay it down Lad. I suppose it is to take away the rem in s of Modesty in a Married Woman all at once for they think that Quality is properly the Vertue of a Maid Enter Footman that Whispers Sir Solomon Sir Sol. Tom take hold of your Mistress the Parson 's in the next Room let 's dispatch that and then for the Supper and then for the Posset you Rogue Enter Careless and Friendlove Ast. Cla. Ha! Ha! Ha! This is his contrivance Friend Cousen Sir Solomon I 'm your humble Servant and Miss my Cousen Clarinda this is very kindly done Cle. Aside to Sir Sol. what does this old strumpet Mean Sir Sol. Faith I can't tell I suppose some joke of Freeman's Friend My Cousen my Lady Dainty This was extemely obliging to summon all your Friends to the Celebration of our Nuptials I don't know how I shall be able to return this Favour but the Captain Madam must answer for me Lad. What Captain and what Nuptials do you speak of Mrs. Friendlove Friend Your Ladyship has a mind to give me some confusions but your Ladyship need not be told that in half an Hour at most my Name it is to be Freeman Cle. Sir Sol. Freeman Here 's another Plot another Plot Ast. Ha! Ha! Ha! Cla. How Madam are your pretentions to my Husband Friend Your Husband why am I deceiv'd then Miss Captain pray speak am I Cheated Dear Captain Cousen are you a Rogue Ha! Are you false to me Fre. Why what can be said you stay'd so long that I was quite out of Patience and seeing the Parson the Musick and all things ready and this Lady in Humour and rather than disappoint my Lady Dainty I ingag'd my self here that 's all Friend That 's all Cle. Sir Sol. Ha! Ha! Ha! Friend You false ungrateful Fellow to serve a Woman of my Relations so Aside But this damn'd Jade to make me wait so long She was an hour looking for my false Teeth if I had layn in 'em as I us'd to do at my Lady Topers all had been well I 'll turn her away immediately but first I wish you all jealous when you have no reason and secure when you have and may every Body think your Wives Handsome but your selves and may your Children be as dull as if they were lawfully begot Exit Cle. A heavy Curse Sir Sol. Farewel Hermaphrodite well this is a night of Intrigues nothing but Stratagems Tom I begin to be in Love with my self when I think I was the first Ingineer Fre. Nay 't was all your own Contrivance Sir Sol. All things break out so luckily But stay there 's Careless left how shall we provide for him he 's a very honest Fellow Car. Don't Name that Sir Solomon if you intend to prefer me but now I have no hopes of being a General I think I must go into the Country and be my Elder Brother's Butler Sir Sol. Ay thou hadst always a kindness for the Cellar but if you wou'd make your Fortune under him get to be his Steward Iack rather than his Butler for then you may come to be richer than your Master in a little time if you have any Discretion Car. Which I never had but there 's another way I like better if you wou'd promise me your Interest Sir Sol. If it be not to serve the Court-Party I promise you Car. Not in the least 't is only to perswade that Lady who I have found is your Relation to think better of me than I do of my self and take me for Life Sir Sol. That 's a long Lease but she has 200 l. a Year to keep it in repair Turning to Sylvia well Cousen what think you of this Handsome Scoundrel H 'as been a Volunteer a great while let him now fight under a Commission Car. You see Madam how Ominous it was to begin with a Quarrel I knew 't wou'd be a Match by our Scolding before hand Syl. If we don't after 't will be well enough Car. We must not be singular now and then 't will be necessary to be like the rest of the World Ast. Well Clarinda I wish you perfect Joy and must own to you that your life is the Happiest there all is Quiet all is Peace there is nothing to steal the Colour from your Cheeks or betray you to Surprizes and now I am convinc'd of the Folly the Confusion and the Adversity of Mine The Guilty still with anxious Cares are prest The truly Good alone are truly Blest Exeunt EPILOGUE By a FRIEND Spoken by the Sickly LADY LET none hereafter Plays Vngodly call For this was writ to mortifie you all No Parson 's here expos'd no Brothel storm'd But a kind handsome keeping Wife Reform'd A sign the Youth the World n'er understood Or else he would not dare to be so good He must the Fame he aims at quite disown Who draws good Characters to spoil his own This to excuse I thought a Friend he 'd need And came sick as I am his Cause to plead 'T is the first Visit I protest I 've made You 're sometimes kind to what I do before you Pity the Youth for my sake I implore you Hissing to Death my tender Organ Wounds And a sick Ear abhors ungrateful Sounds Yet can Applause though ne'er so loud give Ease For they who flatter Women always please Then vain Assistance will I now explore In Physick and Astrology no more You dear Physicians must my Health insure And t'other Visit will confirm my Cure Else what 's already done is all in vain And I relapse till you come here again By you I shall be always to be seen For whate'er ails the sickly Fair within The Doctor at all Seasons is let in FINIS
Ladies Woman it instructs us in the Fashionable Mysteries of Lying Hypocrisy and Intriegue so that half a Years Service I 'll maintain shall teach a Woman to Cuckold her Husband with more dexterity than ten Years practice Exit Enter Freeman and Astrea Fre. I 'm in a Wood. Ast. To bring you out I must tell you that 't is with a great deal of difficulty I stir abroad and that I have contriv'd your acquaintance with her who is my Relation and Neighbour in order to gain more opportunities for my self and under that colour make our affair as lasting as secure Fre. I begin to understand you I must publickly declare my self Madam Clarinda's Lover while an excellent Plot which if you thought of it Ast. You are Mad I tell you she 's in earnest she saw you lik'd you and would not rest till I had told her a possibility of seeing you again which I promis'd for the reasons I have given now d' ye think I han't made a great venture Fre. Is she very handsome Ast. If she were I find I should be in danger Fre. No but I should then convince you nothing could shake your interest in my heart Ast. Well some People do think her handsome I wish you mayn't but have a care how you move I shall be very Jealous Fre. I 'm afraid I shall do it so awkardly she 'll find me out Ast. Trust nature but I have one scruple just comes into my head that will spoil all Fre. Nay then we are lost what is it Ast. I 'm afraid we shall lose the pleasure of the adventure to think that it will not be in our own power to discover it Fre. That indeed is a scruple I should not have thought of but we must bear our misfortune as well as we can and let us not be the first instance of Lovers that could not brook adversity Enter Fidelia Fid. Madam Mrs Clarinda is at the Door Ast. Very well Exit Fidelia Stay here while I prepare her and in the mean time I 'll send Mrs. Friendlove the Woman of the House to entertain you with her Pedigree and Impertinence Exit Freeman Solus This is an Excellent Wench and I Love her Heartily but 500 l. a Year I don't know what to do let me consider if I Marry there 's a Pretty Woman and 500 l. a Year which are not often together Hum If I don't here 's the most agreeable Creature in the World and Hum A Poor Lover is the Devil No Bankrupt ever found a fair one Kind Now for this Well-wisher to the Mathematicks Enter Friendlove Friend A lack-a-Day Here 's the Poor Gentleman alone Fre. This is kindly done Madam Friend You and I Captain must be acquainted it seems Fre. You make me proud Friend I knew one of your Name in Nottingham I believe we are a little related For you must know Captian as I told you within I am some way a Kin to most of the great Families in England and I never was two Minutes with any Body of Pedigree but I found out that I was their Cousin Fre. Very likely Madam This is an Original Aside Friend For which reason Captain out of pure respect to my Relations I make all my Servants call me at every Word My Lady and your Ladyship Fre. Your Ladiship is extremely in the right Friend Ha! ha ha I 'll tell you a very pretty Accident where I was visiting t'other Day came in three Welch Ladies who pretend forsooth to be above other Folks for Family and to be related to none but themselves But in a quarter of an hour's time Captain nothing was so great as I and my Cousins for upon a Comparison of our Pedigree it appear'd that we all came from a Marriage of the Ap Shinkins and the Ap Shones but you don't mind Me you are thinking of Miss Fre. Miss Friend Ay my Cousin Caelia I call her Miss because I knew her from a Child It was the neatest best humour'd thing But pray Captain how long have you been in Flanders Fre. Three Years Madam Friend She always delighted in her Chamber and plac'd every thing in such order I warrant you have a Mistress in every Town Fre. Yes Madam Friend Poor Gentleman You can't think how Miss would work she made me the Prettiest Purse and I lost it going with some Ladies to a Fortune-Tellers Fre. This is design'd Murder Holding his Ears aside Friend But now you talk of Fortune-Tellers Captain I know some People laugh at 'em but as sure as you are there he told me every thing so exactly that I was forc'd to give him t'other Shilling to hold his Tongue Fre. You did very prudently Madam Friend Are the Women in Flanders very handsome Fre. No but to make amends they are very Kind Friend Huh! Are they so Well I Love sincerity Free No Body dies there of any thing but Bullets Enter Clarinda and Astrea Cla. Here 's a Man Fre. Ha! Here will be fine Work Aside Friend Come Ladies don't be frighten'd here 's enough of us to deal with one Man 'T is Capt. Freeman a Cousin of Mine who has been giving me an account of his Travels which is so diverting Ast. He looks alarm'd I 'll watch Him Aside Friend He says the Women in Flanders Miss are not half so handsome as they are here Free These Ladies will Justify it Ast. I find there are Courtiers in Flanders if there are no Beauties Cla. You 're the first Traveller Sir that did not highten the Rarities of of the Place I 'll warrant there are handsome Women Fre. There may Madam but they don't do so much mischief as in England They know the danger of letting 'em be seen and kindly keeping 'em up in Nunneries and Convents Friend I Love 'em for that truly I am glad I was not born there a Woman must spend her Youth and Beauty over a String of Beads or a piece of Needle-Work a pretty diversion we know better things in England Cla. It may be a cunning Sir to encrease that danger you speak of for what is always before us does not affect us so much and where Beauty is so common I fansie it does little harm Fre. Against that Madam you are an instance Cla. Mrs. Friendlove your Relation has Travel'd farther than Flanders Friend Pardon me Madam my Cousin knows a pretty Lady and if he had turn'd his Eyes off you might have seen more instances Fre. turning to her O dear Madam Aside A good occasion to Court my Mistress Friend Oh good Sir Fre. I must have confess'd that thou art a Monster Aside Friend Sweet Sir Fre. looking upon Clarinda all the while So much Youth and Beauty Friend Oh dear Sir Free The most agreeable Air Friend The civilest best bred Gentleman Fre. And Wit that would have Kill'd without the Assistance of your Eyes Friend Well I Love Truth and Honour Cla. Ast. Ha! ha ha He manages it rarely Fre. The genteelest Woman in the