Sister will never forgive me if I let him see her He 's a well spoken man if I durst trust him he shou'd sollicite for me but then he 's so woundy handsome and so amorous I doubt he 'd speak one word for me and two for himself as the saying is Enter Sir Charles Beauclair talking to Eugenia Sir Char. You say you will not injure the ' Squire Eug. No not in the least-she hath sworn never to marry him and the Law will in time recover her right Only this way is sooner and cheaper Sir Char. The Lady 's free and I 'll neither oppose or assist it further Haâ—… there he stands how is 't Brother Cheat. Very well I thank you Sir Charles Sir Char. Your Servant is going Cheat. Brother you never care for my Company you take me for a Nump-Scull a half-witted Fellow and udsbâ—…res wou'd you but ha' me to the Tavern you shou'd find I cou'd Drink my G'ass Break my Jest Kiss my Mistress with the best of ye Flesh Try old Barnaby Cheatall at your next Joâ—…ial meeting Sir Char. You 're merry Sir But I 'm in haste Exit Cheat. Udsbores Women and Wine both Unwholsom Punâ—…sh ye There 's a Taste of my Wit in my â—…ursing as the whole Cargo o' the Bullies lies in swearing There 't is agen I faith Am not I damnable Ingenions Gentil Live and Learn Sirrah and be Hang'd and forget all as the saying is what a Dickins ails me Hanging never comes in my Mouth but a Quaâ—…m comes o're my Stomach That curs'd old Woman Didst observe how she look'd like the Witch before the last new Ballad Gent. She had indeed a vâ—…ry Prophetick Face One knocks Gentil opens the Door Beaumont Enters Drest like a Seaman Gent. Who wou'd you speak with Sir Beau. With Mrs. Arabella Venturewell Gent. She 's not here Beau. Now by the Cannon's Fire 't is false I have come ten Thousand Lâ—…gues to see her and will not be so answered Cheat. A terrible Fellow Gadzooks Pray Sir what 's your business with her Beau. She 's my Sister that 's sufficient for your Impertinence Cheat. You the Lawfull Begotten Son of Sir George Venturewell begging your Pardon I believe you are mistaken Friend in your Father as many a man may be for Sir George had never any but this Daughter Beau. No â—…'m not his Lawfull begotten Son not the weak off-spring of Cheat. O Lard what pains he takes to tell me he 's the Son of a Whore Beau. Born in India Bred a Bucanier Sword and Fire have been my play-Fellows and Ravishing my Pleasure In far distant Worlds I have scattered my rough Image and as my Sword has cut off their dull Breed so my vigorous youth has left a Race of future Hero's Cheat A very terrible Fellow as I hope for mercy Beau. Rich with the spoils of long successfull War I have visited this Climate in search of Arabella whom I have often heard my Father mention with much tenderness I am directed hither Therefore do not raise my Fury with delays For Cause or not Cause if I am Angry Blood must appease it Cheat. O Lard O Lard what shall I do He 'll fright me into a Kentish Ague I must speak him fair Good Sir all your desires shall be fulfilled have but a minute's patience Come along Gentil come along and help me intreat her to speak him fair or I 'm a lost man I 'll wait upon ye in a Twinkling Sir Exit with Gentil Beaum. It works as I cou'd wish it goes against me to terrify this Fool so much but he deserves it Enter Cheatall and Gentil Cheat. Oh! Gentil what shall I say Gent. The Lord knows I don't Beau. Well Sir where 's my Sister Cheat. Alas I think she 's vanish'd Beau. How d' ye trifle with my Anger bring me stories sit for a Baby Blood and Thunder if I Unsheath my Sword it finds a Scabbard in your Guts Confess or by the Cannons fire Cheat. I do confess that thinking of your coming and knowing her to be a little wild lest she shou'd have been out of the way I lockt her up But what is now become of her by the Cannons fire the dreadfullest Oath I ever heard I cannot tell Beau. aside I shall never hold laughing Enter Eugenia Eug. Oh! my Conscience My tortur'd Conscience I cannot keep it Beau. What 's the matter Eugen. Oh! I went into the Room where the Lady was lockt up And there 's at least a Pail full of blood all the Water in the Sea will never wash the stains out I believe ' Squire Barnaby and Gentil have killed her cut her to pieces and carried her away under their Cloaks Cheat. Oh! Impudence O Lard O Lard Sir I han't the heart to kill a Chicken I always swoon at the sight of my own Blood speak Gentil why thou hast never a Cloak That 's a strong proof Sir Gentil has ne'er a Cloak Eug. Why then it went all under yours Besides Gentil has a large pair of Trowsers that I 'll swear For you made him bring my Lady home half a Venison Pasty in 'em Shrieks out Ah! look o' their Shoes they have Padled in it Beau. Ay 't is so and so I 'll be Reveng'd Cut thee small as the first Atoms that huddled up thy senseless Carkass nor will I be troubled to bear thee hence but stamp thy vile Clay to it's kindred Dust and leave thee here for Rubbish Cheat. Oh Sir upon my knees I beg you 'd hear me Eug. interposing Hold Sir don't kill the Miscreant that will bring your self into trouble Our Law will hang him I warrant ye What made him order her being here to be denied Cheat. Ay Good Sir let me be hang'd That 's my Destiny I see there 's no avoiding it Gentil Beg I may be hang'd Gent. Pray Sir let my Master be hangâ—…d Beau. Well I 'll try your Law if that fails this I 'm sure never will How must we proceed Madam puts up his Sword Eug. I 'll go with ye for a Man with the Staff of Authority he shall order him The very â—…tones in the Street wou'd turn Constables to seize such a Monster Kill a pretty Lady and cut her to pieces oh horrid Cheat. You are a lying Whore if I durst tell you so aside Beau. You Fellow come hither Cheat. Run Gentil run Proffer him all I 'm worth Beau. aside to Gentil When we are gone carry him to my Lodgings I have told my Landlady the story and she 's provided for him Gent. It shall be done Is there no mercy Cheat. Ah Lord no mercy Beau. Well! we 'll be with you immediately Come Madam Eug. Ay ay repent and pray do ' Squire do Exit cum Beau. Cheat. Oh Gentill That ever I was born That ever I was born What did he say to thee Gentil Gent. He wou'd have had me turned evidence against your Worship and confess But I 'll be hang'd first Cheat. I 'd
make out what he says about his intail'd Estate the man is not to be despis'd Enter Spendall Spend. My Lady Beauclair your most humble Dear pretty Creature yours Kisses her La. Beauc. Lord Mr. Spendall what d' ye do well I wonder Peg endures it I 'll vow and swear Mr. Spendall Knights presume no farther than to kiss the tip of my Daughters little Finger and you make nothing of her Lips Spend. How make nothing of ' em pardon me Madam I put 'em to the use Nature design'd They are as sweet as and as soft as Gad I must taste 'em again to raise my Fancy Peg. Be quiet let me alone Mr. Spendall Spend. singing Oh give your sweet Temptations o'er I 'll taste those dangerous Lips no more La. Beauc. You 're a strange man but come sing us a Song of your own Husband says you can make Varses Peg. But let it be as like that as you can for methinks that is very pretty Spend. aside Does the Fool think I shall make it ex tempore however I have one pretty near it as it happens I 'll rather expose myself than not endeavour to divert you Madam Sings whilst the Mother and Daughter imitate his Gestures A SONG by Mr. AT dead of Night when wrap'd in Sleep The Peacefull Cottage lay Pastora left her folded Sheep Her Garland Crook and needless Scrip Love led the Nymph astray Loose and Undrest she takes her flight To a near Myrtle-shade The conscious Moon gave splendid light To Bless the Ravisht Lover's sight And gain the Loving Maid His eager Arms the Nymph Embrace And to asswage the Pain His restless Passion he obeys At such an hour in suâ—… a place What Lover cou'd contain In vain she call'd the conscious Moon The Moon no succour gave The cruel Stars unmov'd look'd on And seem'd to wink at what was done Nor wou'd her humour save Vanquish'd at last by powerful Love The Nymph explring lay No more she sigh'd no more she strove Since no kind Stars were found above She blush'd and dy'd away Yet Blest the Grove her happy Flight And Youth that did betray And panting dying with Delight She Blest the kind transporting Night And Curst approaching Day La. Beauc. Thank ye 't is very sine I 'll vow and swear Peg. So 't is indeed Mother La. Beauc. Now to leave fooling where 's my Husband Spend. I know not I han't seen him these two days Here my Father writes to me if I will take up that 's the old man's Expression and find a virtuous Woman with a Fortune he will give me Threethousand pounds down and settle Eight hundred a year and faith I am trying to obey ' the rich Cuff and wean my self from my old Friends and the dear Bottle La. Beauc. Ay you do very well Mr. Spendall I should be overjoy'd to see you take up and perhaps a Fortune may be found I 'll say no more but a thorow Reformation will produce strange matters matters I little thought of but I 'll say no more Spend. Your Ladiship must not say a word of this to Sir Charles for then he 'll forbid me the sight of this dear Creature whose Charms alone have power to work the mention'd Reformation La. Beauc. No no fear not that I han't so many Friends to go the ready way to lose ' em Peg. For my part I don't love Vather so well to tell him any thing of us Enter a Boy with a Letter Boy Madam here 's a Penny-post Letter to your Ladiship La. Beauc. To me Peg. I warrant 't is to me from some Spark La. Beauc. Stand away Hussy 't is durracted to my my Lady Beauclair What 's this stammering at it Mrs. Banter's the Indian House Read it Mr. Spendall some mischief I believe Spend reads Tho' unknown I cannot forbear in Justice to your Ladiships Merit informing you that Sir Charles at four a clock will be with a Mistress at Mrs. Bantam's use your Discretion but assure your self it is a Truth La. Beauc. O the Villain the Rogue the confounded Whore I 'll tear his and her Eyes out always at home he 's sick his Head aches and he must lye alone Ah Mr. Spendall if I should tell you the naked Truth you 'd say he was a Viilain too I 've often told him his own with Tears and the brazen-fac'd Villain has forswore it My Husband with a Whore I have no Patience I 'll go there immediately and stay till he comes Peg. Ay do mother and I 'll go with you and help to pull their Eyes out Spend. Are you both mad Why all there love Sir Charles to that degree they 'd watch and turn him back you'd never conceal your Passion your only way is to come after the hour and then you 'll certainly surprize ' em La. Beauc. That 's true well good Mr. Spendall stay and comfort me I fear I shall have my Fits and then no two men can hold me Spend. I would with all my Heart and esteem my self happy to serve you but my Father has sent me twenty Guineas for a Token and if I don't go this minute the man will be gone out of Town and carry 'em back with him La. Beauc. Nay that is not to be neglected Come Child we 'l go to my Cousin Prattle's and tell her this News my Husband with a Whore I cannot bear it Spend. I must seize a Kiss else I shall faint before I see you agen Peg. Pish pish I think the man 's distracted La. Beauc. Is this a time and my Husband with a Whore I wish my Nails were twice as long for her sake Ah Child thy Vather was anotherguess man than this tho' he had Faults too Come away Your Servant Mr. Spendall Peg. Your Servant Sir La. Beauc. My Husband with a Whore Exeunt La. Beauclair and Peggy Spend. Ladies your most obedient Slave Thus far Affairs go on as I could wish Now if my Lady does but abuse Bellinda till it come to parting between Sir Charles and she then my Miss being out of his Tuition I fear not her falling into mine She 's damn'd silly I am forc'd to let all Courtship lye in Kissing for she understands a Complement no more than Algebra Well her Wealth makes it up Now for Dinner Exit Scene Changes to St. James Park Enter Sir Charles Beauclair Bellinda and Mrs. Beauclair Mrs. Beau. This Walk i' th' Park has done me good Bell. 'T was very refreshing Mrs. B. Is not this better now dear Bellinda than reading and sighing away every beauteous Morning Bell Yes if at each gazer the conscious Blushes wou'd forbear to rise if I cou'd look upon this object of my Love and Vertue not shrink back it were true happiness Sir Char. My lovely Charmer let me call this day mine and oblige you to be chearful Mrs. B. I warrant ye by and by we 'll be as merry as the you know the title that sticks ahand Uncle ha yonder 's Sir
him in I 'll do well enough with him now get you gone and fear nothing Enter Sir Francis Wildlove Sir Fran. So Sir I suppose you think matters have gone swingingly on your side and have laught immoderately at the reflection how those green years have made a Fool of me but Chance has thrown me on thee once agen and now for those Feasts of Joy an after reckoning Drâ—…s must be paid young Gentleman you understand my meaning Mrs. B. Yes and will answer it but hear me first 't is to provoke you I speak know then your Mistress was my easy Conquest I scarce had time to say one soft thing before she cry'd Let 's fly sweet youth e'er that rough man returns and in thy arms forget him Sir Fran. She 's a Jilt and for a well-drest Fop wou'd quit a man that saved her life Mrs. B. Then this Ring was presented I suppose you may ha' seen it adorn thy fair hand and with ten thousand kisses 't was whisper'd you shall not want for Gold Sir Fran. Tho' I value her no more than I do thee yet I will have thy life for harbouring so damn'd a thought that I was fitter for your sport Come on Mrs. B. Hold hold Sir Francis I 'll not pretend to take your Sword tho' I cou'd your Mistress from ye see my Credentials for my Cowardice puts up her Ring Sir Fran. Mrs. Beauclair What a blind Puppey am I twice in one day that 's hard I faith Mrs. Beau. Pray return your Lady back her favour gives him the Ring Sir Fran. Madam Mrs. B. Nay look not concerned upon my word I 'll never interrupt you more Hug in your Bosom the plaister'd mischiefs their blotted Souls and spotted Reputations no Varnish can cover o'er pursue o'ertake possess the unenvied 'mongst the Painted Tribe most worthily bestow your heart Sir Fran. Think ye so meanly of me my heart bestow'd amongst your Sexes shame No Madam Glorious Virtue alone can reach at that my loving is a diversion I can soon â—…ake off Mrs. B. That 's hard to believe but I must beg your pardon I 'm in haste to unrig Sir Fran. Hear me a moment you have seen my frailties if like Heaven you can forgive a truer penitent or a more constant votary no cruel Virgin ever found Mrs. B. Have a care of the dull road Sir Francis Farewell Exit Sir Fran. Go thy ways for a pretty witty agreeable Creature but if I shou'd seduce her into Matrimony I fear the common fate will attend her Beauty quickly tarnish and good humour vanish Exit Enter Spendall and Lywell Spend. Ha Lywell I am the happiest man alive almost out of Fortune's Power Lyw What is 't transports you so some whim some Chymical delusion that will fail in the projection and vanish into Air. Spend. Hear me and then with admiration be dumb nor dare to contradict my wit or Plots agen In short my Lady Beauclair and Miss are in open Rebellion by my perswasion and to Compleat my good Fortune I have borrow'd ten Guineas of Sir Charles with the help of which I 'll be married to his Daughter in-Law within these two hours Lyw Ha! I begin to think the Devil has left playing at Leger de main with thee and having secur'd thee resolves to bestow somâ—… of this World's wealth upon thee Spend. Canst not thou procure a Templer's Chamber for an hour or two and appear with the Gravity of a long Robe Lyw With ease I know a young Spark that has sine Lodgings there but by his old â—…ather is kept at short allowance a Treat or a very small sum will engage that and all his habiliments Spend. Canst thou nâ—…t put on the grave look of a starcht Councellor Lyw Hum hum 〈◊〉 I 'll speak with you immediately you seâ—… Friend I 'm busy How was that Spend. Pretty well Come about it presently and I 'll bring the Ladies to you as my Father 's chief Lawyer Be sure you tell 'em you have the settlement of his Estate upon me in your hands and seem very desirous I shou'd do well Lyw I warrant ye and shâ—…n't we have lusty treats old Boy Spend. I thought your Conscience had scrupled the proceedings Lyw O'Pox my Conscience neâ—…er tsoubles me but when Affairs go ill Spend. Well make haste and doubt not feasting I must to my Charge lest they cool 〈◊〉 Fools are seldom long resolv'd and I know a finer Fellow wou'd get both Mother and Daughters heart They 're now in a kindly growing warmth and the old oneâ—…s Imagination tickled as much with thoughts of darling â—…eggy's Marriage as ever 't was with her own Farewell be sine you observe your directions Lyw It shall be done dear lucky Devil Coughs Hum hum I shall be perfect in a Grave Cough and a hum of business by that time you come to my Chamber Spend. Hold fâ—…r I had forgot Whereabouts is this Chamber for I guess your Worship's Name is not so famous to direct Lyw Come as we go along I 'll tell you Exeunt Enter Arabella mâ—…ting Engenia Arab. So my dear deliverer how have you succeeded Eug. Oh Madam the poor ' Squire 's frighted out of the little wit he had one Scene more and the Day 's our own Arab 〈◊〉 become of Mr. 〈◊〉 Eug. He 's about some earnest business of Sir Charles Beauclair's I know not what 't is but there 's a heavy Clutter amongst 'em Arab. Well you brought me to the Ladies Lodging but I believe that 's the only place she is not to be found at for I have waited in vain with much iâ—…patience to see her Eug. Her Footman 's below and says she 'll be here immediately Arab. Prithee let 's into the Chamber first and you shall give an Account of the ' Squire 's fright Eug. I follow you Madam Exeunt SCENE Sir Charles Beauclair's House â—…nter Sir Charles Sir Char. Sure the World 's all running mad or else resolved to make me so at home I cannot meet with a sensible Answer but Oh what touches nearest the Dear the cruel the charming Maid Bellinda will not see me how shall I appease the 〈◊〉 fair my Wife too not returned where will this end Gentil Eugenia James Within Sir Sir Char. Sir Where ye everlasting Dormice will none come near me Exit Enter Cheatall and Gentil Cheat. Gadzooks This Councellor Cobblecase has talkt Law and drank Claret with me till my brains are turn'd topsy-turvy Gad I wou'd not have my Lady-Sister see me now for a King's Ransome Tho' udsbores I know not why she shou'd because she 's a little older set her eternal Clack a running upon all my Actions Gent. Sir my Lady and Miss are both abroad Cheat. That 's well Why Gentil here Cobblecase advises me not to look up the young woman but to use her kindly and Gadzooks I 'm in a plaguy loving humour I 'll try her good nature once again Hold yonder comes Sir Charles My
the Earth yet in every smallest Interval of Sence calling on Bellinda Bell. A noble Birth a censorious World a mourning Father all plead against thee Oh talk no more lest you force my Hand to some desperate Act and yet your Words pierce my Bosom with greater pain than pointed Steel Sir Char. I see you are resolv'd on my Undoing fix'd like my relentless Fate therefore I 'll not urge another syllable but quietly as dying Men when Hope 's all past quit Life and their dearest Friends for ever ever leave thee Bell. That sad silent Look discovers such inward Worlds of Woe it strikes me through staggers my best Resolves removes the Props I have been raising for my sinking Fame and blind with passion I could reel into thy Arms. Tell me on what are thy Thoughts employ'd Sir Char. On the Curse of Life impos'd on us without our Choice and almost always attended with tormenting Plagues Bell. Yet we may meet again in Peace and Joy when this Gigantick Honour appears no Bugbear and our Desires lawfully be crown'd It is a guilty Thought nor shall I ever dare to form it to a Wish Sir Cha. â—…ut dost thou think we may embracing her What! uncontroul'd clasp thee thus Oh Extasie with wild Fury run o'er each trembling beauteous Limb and grasp thee as drowning Men the dear Bark from whence they were thrown Bell Away away What are we doing Divide him Heaven from my fond guilty Eyes set Seas and Earth and Worlds of Fire between us for Virtue Fate and Honour with an united Cry have doom'd that we must meet no more Exit Sir Cha. To raging Seas Sieges and Fields of Battle will I fly Pleasures and Pastimes to the Woes I feel Oh Bellinda Exit SCENE Changes Enter Gentil Gent. I cou'd laugh my Heart sore to see what a condition the Fool my Master 's in every knocking at the Door is as good as a Dose of Rubarb and every Noise makes him leap like a Vaulter Ha! he 's coming the poor Baby dares not be alone Cheatall peeping Cheat. Gentil Is the Coast clear Gen. Yes Sir Cheat. Oh Gentil Gen. What 's the matter You look worse frighted than you were Cheat. Ay and well I may you leave me alone and I shall grow distracted I have I have seen a Ghost Gen. A Ghost what Mrs. Arabella's Ghost Cheat. Nay I did not stay to examin that for as soon as ever I perceiv'd the Glympse on 't I shut up my Eyes and felt my way out of the Chamber Gen. Where was this Ghost Sir Cheat. Oh! behind the Bed behind the Bed Gentil Gen. Lord Sir 't was nothing but the Cloak I hung it there Cheat. Was it not O' my Conscience I thought it had been a Giant of a Ghost Hark hark what 's that he starts A Cry without seeming at a distance Boy without A full and true Relation of a horrid and bloody Murther committed on the Body of Mrs. Arabella 〈◊〉 a young Lady by one ' Squire Barnaby Cheatall and his Man Gentil shewing how they lock'd her up in the dark then cut her to pieces and carried the pieces away under their Cloaks and threw 'em into Chelsey-Reach where at low Water they were fâ—…d Cheat. O Lard O Lard the pieces found Gentil Gen. So it seems Sir Boy sâ—…eming farther off A full and true Relation of a c. Cheat. Nay now we shall be hang'd for certain not the least Hopes Oh! oh oh Crying Gen. Come Sir have a little Courage Cheat. To confess the truth to thee I never had any Courage in my Life and this would make the stoutest man tremble Oh! Gen. I am thinking Sir why we was not at Chelsey-Reach that day Cheat. No no but may be they 'l swear we was Gen. My Lady and Miss hated her sure they han't been so barbarous Cheat. Like enough pin-up Petticoats are as convenient as Cloaks besides my Sister is a Fury I 've heard her threaten pulling Folks a pieces a hundred times and now she has don 't We 'l e'en peach Gen. What your own Sister Cheat. Ay my own Mother to save my self I say we 'l peach Gen. That 's not so good for if they prove themselves innocent 't will fall upon us agen Heark ye Sir there 's only Eugenia can witness against us suppose we try'd to stifle her Evidence with a swindging Bâ—…ibe I never knew a Chambermaid refuse greasing in the Fist upon any Account Cheat. My dear Gentil if she inclines my Offers shall be so large that for the rest of her Life she shall have nothing to do but stuâ—…y to â—…ake her Hands white that she may burn all her Frippery and be able to spaâ—… it with Quality Gen. Sir I ll send her Propositions Cheat. half draws his Sword Do but if the stubborn Jade won't complâ—… appoint a private meeting and stop her Mouth with this 〈◊〉 you understand me Gen. Yes Sir Aside I find his Conscience would swallow a real Murder Sir if you please we 'll go in and write what you design to offer her Cheat. Let us If you meet her Gentil and she 's surly Remember ugh ugh Iâ—…ls draws his Sword Exeunt Enter Sir Francis Wildlove and to him Searchwell Searchw Sir Charles sends you word he is baâ—…e ordering his Affairs designing with all speed to travel and says he shall never see you more only to take his leave Sir Fran. Hey day O' my Conscience this charming little Beauclâ—…ir has me under a Spell and I shall meet with nothing but Disappointments till I submit to her Searchw Ay Sir you wou'd soon find the tâ—…ue Pleasures of virtuous Love and a satisfaction in denying your Appetite Sir Fran. Preaching Fool hold you your Peace Enter a Servâ—…nt Serv. Sir a Gentlewoman below desires to speak with you Searchw aside So there 's no great danger my 〈◊〉 shouâ—…d Reform when the Devil is alwaies at hand with a Temptation in Petticoats Sir Fran. Searchwell wait on the Lady up Searchw Ah Lord Sir Fran. Sirrah I shall break your Head if you don't leave this canting trade Searchw I am gone Sir Exit and Re-enters with Mrs. Dresswell Dressw aside This is a mad Message my Lady has sent me with to her Lover I 'm afraid he 'l kick me for my News hang 't he 's a Gentleman and I 'll venture Sir Fran. Ha! pretty Mrs. Dreswell this is a favour I never receiv'd from you before Must I own the Blessing only to your Good-will or is my Happiness greater Did your Lady send Mrs. Dressw I came from my Lady Sir but what Happiness you 'l find I know not methinks she has done a strange mad thing Sir Fran. What 's the matter Mrs. Dressw She 's married sir. Sir Fra. The Devil she is Mrs. Dressw Even so she said those that she fancied car'd not for her therefore she resolv'd to bestow her self and Fortunes on a secret Lover whom indeed her Ladiship owns she never valued a