Selected quad for the lemma: friend_n

Word A	Word B	Word C	Word D	Occurrence	Frequency Band	MI	MI Band	Prominent
friend_n	answer_v	good_a	see_v	1,023	5	2.8313	3	true

Text snippets containing the quad

ID	Title	Author	Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication)	STC	Words	Pages
A10867	A nevv yeeres gift The courte of ciuill courtesie: fitly furnished with a plesant porte of stately phrases and pithie precepts: assembled in the behalfe of all younge gentlemen, and others, that are desirous to frame their behauiour according to their estates, at all times, and in all companies: thereby to purchase worthy praise, of their inferiours: and estimation and credite amonge theyr betters. Out of Italian, by S.R. Gent.	S. R. (Simon Robson), d. 1617.; Mont. Prisacchi Retta, Bengalassa del, attributed name.	1582 (1582)	STC 21135; ESTC S110654	28,088	48

behinde his backe as they terme it Prouided that hée picke them out according to the distinction of persons beefore described and withal as it is to bee consydered that all thinges spoken in a showe of mirth though it seeme to the hearer somwhat sharpe and peraduenture anger him is yet to bée dissembled and answered merely In all other entertainements spoken seriously a gladsome looke is a better grace then a flatteting smile So whensoeuer a man in any thing that hee may atribute truly to himselfe is praised to his face though it bee spoken earnestly and of good meaning hée ought also in his foresaide manner of answeres to shew sutche a smilynge grace as it may appeare hée taketh it as spoken rather of their curtesie then for any cause he finds in himselfe why they should so say in speeche for the most parte the countenance the grace and sounde in the pronunciation is able with one selfe sentence without altring woorde or sillable to please or displease others to shew himselfe wise or make him for so mutche to séeme foolish Salomon affirmeth that there is nothing that more trieth the wit of man then the hearing of his owne praise for saith he the wise man is put too his triall when he is praised to his face And therefore for this matter I conclude that forasmuch as many times it is harde to finde who speaketh of flatterie contrarie to his thought who by way of mockerie though he knowe he say true to trie him and who of good zeale to shew affection and to encourage him The surest way in this doubt is except to those whose fréendship by other meanes he hath experience of to vse his answers so as he may make them earnest or sporte at his pleasure as he perceiueth their asseueracion to prouoke him ¶ How a man shall acquite himselfe towards noble persons that shall either for his freendes sake or his owne offer him curtesies or assure him of freeindship willing him in all chaunces to be bolde with him ¶ The .iiii. Chapter IN this case as in all other of intertainments the inferiour must note in what manner whether seriouslye or familliarly such curtesie or intertainment be offred him and thereafter to chuse out and shape out answers agréeable to eche kinde for the first if he be a straunger to him but not to his freends thus I knowe sutche or sutch of my fréendes so mutche béeholding to you too as hath bin sufficient to binde me to honour and loue you and séeing it pleaseth you to extend your curtesie also towards me I can but wish my seruice as sufficient as my good will is to assure you too of my thankefull minde Or thus My Lorde I can but acknowledge that debte for my selfe which before I thought to owe for others of my fréends that haue tasted of your curtesie but I am glad that I may by this meanes shew it which your Lordship shall finde me ready to doo wherein soeuer I shall thinke my seruice may be acceptable Or thus As this your Lordships goodnes riseth of your curtesie without any desertes so must I confesse my selfe euer vnable to counterpeyse it I can but acknowledge my selfe too mutch bound to you for it and double boūd if it shall please you to commaund me to the vttermost of my power Or thus I humbly thanke your Lordship I can but requite it with my seruice and that I beséech you commaund Or thus My humble thankes are but an vnequall recompence and therefore I shall desire your L. to put my gratefull minde in triall by commaunding my seruice Or shortly thus If my seruice may any way be ought woorth if I may but vnderstande it it shall not néede to be commaunded Or thus I humbly thanke your L. and I beséech you commaund me as your seruant Or thus I humbly thanke your L. and I beséeche you thinke that you voutchsafe this curtesie on him that will be as readie to requite it with the vttermost of his seruice as he that is better stored of woords The vse of long or short sentences must be imployed according as he séeth the hearer at leasure ¶ How when the foresayde speeches bee offered by a noble person plesantly that is of acquaintance which must be also pleasantly answered The .v. Chapter MY Lorde you know I haue no store of eloquence but what mayme so euer you finde in my vtterance I can assure you shall finde none in my good will whensoeuer I may doo you anye seruice Or thus I humbly thanke your Lordship I warrant you I make so sure reckoning thereof as I am more like to be boulde of your curtesie then to request it but I must pray your Lordship to thinke that shall be rather for want of power then of good will Or thus Your Lordship must be content with my humble thankes for this time but I would be very sorie to thinke your Lordship made not accompt of me as of him whom you may most commaund Or thus My Lord I haue had so good experience of your former curtesies bothe towards me and other my fréends as I had néede with my seruice to goe about to recompence some parte of that before I come in debt for any more But the lesse we can requite the more we muste stand bounde ¶ How to an equall or but little better beeing a freend and familliar ¶ The .vi. Chapter TO our fréend thus I am in your debt for so mutch alreadie as if you lende me any more you will make me bankroute and agrée with you for the tenthe parte Or thus You offer me so mutche and I can requite so little as I see you meane to make me an ill debter still Or thus You know I haue no curious woords in stoare but in plaine termes I thanke you and will requite it if I can Or seriously thus I praye you thinke that though I vse not manye woordes with you I thinke my selfe so much beholding to you as wherein I may pleasure you if you commaunde me not I shall thinke you loue me not Or to a straunger thus Syr I thanke you of this curtesie if it shall lie in me to requite it I pray you be as boulde with me Or thus Sir I must be your debter for this curtesie till time and place serue to requite it but in the meane time I thanke you I pray you make the like accompt of me ¶ How a man shall take thankes of a noble person The .vii. Chapter IF thankes be offered in serious manner and for any waightie matter thus My Lorde it was my goodwill as well as my dutie to haue done it to your best contentation but if there be any defect in it I pray your Lordship impute it to mine vnskilfulnesse Or thus My Lord it is no reason that you thanke him whom you ought to commaund and specially me that am vnable to satisfie for the tenthe parte of that dewtie or goodwill I owe you

A NEVV YEERES GIFT THE COVRTE of ciuill Courtesie Fitly furnished with a plesant porte of stately phrases and pithie precepts assembled in the behalfe of all younge Gentlemen and others that are desirous to frame their behauiour according to their estates at all times and in all companies Thereby to purchase worthy praise of their inferiours and estimation and credite amonge theyr betters Out of Italian by S. R. Gent. Imprinted at London by Richard Ihones 1582. To the flourishing Youthes and Courteous young Gentlemen of England and to all others that are desirous and louers of Ciuile Courtesie R. I. the Printer hereof wisheth an happie New yeere present and many to the pleasure of God and their owne hartes desire MOst Courteous young Gentlemen presuming vpon your great Curtesie I haue been so bolde as to present your estate in token and wish of an happie new yeere with these the first fruites of my poore Presse finished since the cumming in of the same Surely the traueill of a Gentleman whom I know not no not so mutch as by name much lesse by person And concerning the copie as he that brought it vnto me made reporte that it was translated out of the Italian by a Gentleman a freende of his desiring me that it might be printed And I being alwaies desirous to farther the studie and procure the delites of all men by publishing bookes of semblable argument thought good to dedicate the same vnto you iudging it in this respect a present more meete for your moste flourishing degree for that I perceiue it to haue beene first written by a Noble and g●●●● personage of Italy and directed vnto his Nephew a young Gentlemā also of noble parentage for the better conforming of his behauiour at his entrace into the Court as it may appeare by his Epistle hereafter following Now for that this case is commō vnto most of you and aboue all other the studie of ciuell Curtesie most incident vnto your calling I am the bo●●er to craue your Courteous countenance and friendly fauour in accepting the same now in English at my hands as a testimonie of my seruiceable heart and good meaning towards you And that receiuing it now frō me as your owne you would vouchsafe of your great curtesie to take both me and it in to your assured protection and to defend both the present and him that offereth it from the spightfull toungues of malicious carpers And in so dooing you shall euermore binde me to emploie what traueill and seruice I can to the aduauncing and pleasuring of your most excellent degree Farewell in the Lord. The Censure of a friende concerning this worke OVr Parents well deserue the pricke of price Who giue vs life which we had not before The teachers care deserues great thanke likewise Who traines the childe and giues the learned lore Immortall praise we ought giue him therefore Some strife hath bin in respect of these things Who best deserues of these two Noble springs ¶ Though one giue life the other learning lendes Let reason rule let wit this matter scan And things are iudgde according to their endes And prouerbe olde sayes manners makes the man The vitall sprite must yeeld to learning than Wherfore you youthes sprunge vp from gentle line Vnto this Court your courteous eares incline ¶ This Court the which of Curtesie takes name Declares what port eche Gentill shall insue At all assayes how he himselfe shall frame To follow what and what for to eschue Thrice happie he whom God shall so indue A thing of weight and wun for simple price Reiect by fooles but purchast by the wise Bengalassa del Mont. Prisacchi Retta vnto Seig. Princisea Ganzar Moretta For his behauiour vz. To my Nephew Seig. Princisca Ganzar Morretta AT MY LAST BEING at Prisacchi vnderstanding by your fathers talke that he minded to haue you a while in the Court where hee hath spent the better part of his life and because it is frequented with all sortes of companies as any place in Italy is I haue directed this little booke which if you read and marke diligently shall be as it were a guide to leade you from a number of snates which you may be trapt withall also for your behauiour in all companies with many other things fit to be knowen of younge Gentlemen and especially for sutch as haue not beene conuersant in all companies Fare ye well ¶ The Contentes of the Booke HOw a younge Gentleman may behaue himselfe in all companies and be prepared for ordinary entertainements and to get a good opinion and credite among his bettars Chap. 1. ¶ How a man shall behaue himselfe in had companye and among sutch roisters as will offer familiaritye with him will he or no and first a guesse of sutch meanes as they will vse thereto Chap. 2. ¶ How a man shall answer to the prayse thankes curtesies seriously offred by his betters or equals 3. ¶ How a man shall acquite himselfe towardes noble persons that shall either for his fréendes sake or his owne offer him curtesies or assure him of friendship willing him in all chaunces to be bolde with him Chap. 4. ¶ Howe when the foresayde spéeches be offered by a Noble person pleasantly that is of acquaintaunce which must be also pleasantly answered Chap. 5. ¶ How to an equall or but little better béeing a friend and familiar Chap. 6. ¶ How a man shall take thankes of a noble person ca. 7 ¶ How a man may giue thankes to his betters and equals Chap. 8. ¶ What manners be requisitie of the Table and what to be shunned what is to be considered in the washing before Dinner and in the sitting downe is set foorth in the beginning of this Direction Chap. 9. ¶ How a man shall pacifie his friend his better or his equall if he haue giuen him vnwillingly any cause of offence Chap. 10. Now a man shall shift off reproches or tauntes offered betwéene sporte and earnest by enuious and scornefull persons that will séeme to doo it so cunningly as the other shall haue the taunt and yet at his owne pleasure will denie it Chap. 11. FINIS The Courte of ciuill Curtesie How a yonge Gentilman may behaue himselfe in all companies and be prepared for ordinary entertainments and to get a good oppinion and credit among his betters Chap. 1. FIrst hee hath to consider that the lacke of good behauiour which is a comely audacitie with out a sausie presumption which argueth discréete iudgement and wisedome maketh his inferiour to be his equal and maketh his equall his better till himselfe hath attayned not only the habit of béeing the like but the time to make himselfe know to be the like Therefore if he shall light in the company of any whose liuing and birth is worse then his owne and yet perceyueth the other for his wisedome and grauitie to be well esteemed of by others it becommeth the yonge Gentleman to giue him the place or at

the companie of his very assured freinds and that for this respect A yonge man must euer thinke that it is vnpossible for him to be so compleat in all perfections of béehauour but that some thing remains in him worthy the laughing at if men should not forbeare him in respect of time which brings experience to the wisest and peraduenture too euen some of the same defects which he seeth scoff at in an other may be in himselfe vnknowen to himselfe or at least others as ill And therefore the wisest way is if his better séeme to deride any for his béehauour to appeare by a smiling countenaunce to be of the same opinion but in woords to escuse it if hee may as if the dooings of him that is mocked shew simplicitie thus It may be that bashfulnes is the cause if they shew rudenes then thus Want of experience makes men erre But if they be his equals or inferiours that so scof then merelye thus Go too syrs many a one going about to mocke on be cares not for dooth often touche himselfe or his néere fréende or by a similitude thus On on saw yée neuer any or this that litfe vp a Weapon to stryke another and hyt himselfe Or thus Take your pleasure my masters I warrant you therebe that doo as mutche for vs as we doo for them And in déede there cannot any greater praise be giuen to any man then this that one shall neuer heere him speake yll of anye and hearyng yll wyll make the best of it Howbéeit it is bothe within the limmittes of honestye wysoome and fréendship any man to discourse plainelie with his freind either of the misbehauiour or vnhonest dealynges of any that on the one side he may shew himselfe a misliker of ill persons and also make his freinde ware of them And by the way it is to be noted that there be thrée sorts of people which whosoeuer shall scoffe skornel at or els iest with them further then the compas of curtesy shall permit shall receiue more disgrace by dooing it then the other shall by suffering it The fyrst is women or simple milde sprited men for women must neuer be iesters nor scoffers further then the bounds of modestie and curtesie to make the time passe away the more pleasantly so that a man to iest so farre with them as they may not for shame answere nor for insufficiencie quarrell for wil be accompted a dishonorable battell wherin the vanquished hath more 〈◊〉 them the vanquisher This is ment by sharpe and taunting iestes when a man will seeke to disgrace or put one out of countenance by iestes for it is better to yéelde with silence then to contend for the masterie in vnfytting termes and to offer the milde spréeted man the like that fynding himselfe agréeued hath neither the wit to shift of it in words neither the courrage to reuenge i● in déede● is 〈◊〉 the same predicament that the woman is And all noble mindes doo of their curtesies forbeare to offend and offer to defend all those that either cannot as féeble persons or ought not as the feminine sexe reuenge or defend themselues The second sorte that may not be mocked or scoffed at ●●e age● persons and such as be deformed for want either of bewtie fanour or other blemishes in their shape stature or linunes because none of these things be faults of their owne making neither lieth it in their power to amend them So as we ought rather to bee mooued thereby too thanke the maker or vs all for dealing so much better with vs then with them then to scorne or depraue them for that they cannot helpt And if withall we will consider that the deformities of the minde be so much fowler then those of the body as the soule is of more value and ought to be more vniforme it wil be a good meane to make the outwarde defects of others very small in respect of our owne which cannot but he greater and many moe and consequently rather to escuse them then despise them The thyrd sorte that cannot beare neither ought to be offred scoffing mocking or lesting be those that be in miscrie either by sorrow imprisonment or any aduersitie by losse of fréen●s substance or credit For these be things sent from God to put vs in remembrance that we hauing deserued as ill may fall into the like when it pleaseth him and in the meane times be obiects for vs to practise our compassion and charitie vpon But there may rise this question séeing that publique enterteinments specially among younge folkes are continued more often with spéeche of little importance then with matters of waight How a man finding himselfe in such companie as are neither fit to discourse of matters of wisdome nor yet to be imparted with of his owne priuate affaires shall finde matter suffici●nt to passe the time in companie For answer héereunto let this be remembred that where as I haue sayd that men must take heede in their open talke how they be to busy in bringing in the sayings and dooings of noble persons least the hearers should thinke that he arrogateth to himselfe greater acquaintance with such then in déede he hath or els least comming to theyr eares they should mislike that their inferiours should make them their talking stockes Yet if he that shall so introduce by way of confirmation ensample or similitude the saying of his betters be sure that it she●●●●s wisdom praise or at the least some pleasantnesse with but any harme or disgrace to any other he may well vse it in his talke Prouided that he speake it as by heresay ercept he haue it in deede by his owne knowledge Also women and deformed persons may be pleasanted and iested with if their wit be sutch as they delight in the like and can in good sporse enterchaunge in the same manner Prouided that the boundes of curtesie be obserued that is that there be no cause of blushing giuen Also all men in sickenes prisonment or pouertie be not miserable for they be only such that haue an afflicted minde for some can iest and scoffe at their owne disgraces thinking thereby to make them seeme the lesse in other mens eyes while they appeare no heuier then sutche as themselues can pleasantly beare And sutch had rather be rested with then pittied The fault therefore that can be committed in these persons is the mocking them behinde their backes or despising them which no man ought to shew to any except it be to them that be knowen to be impudent and shamelesse persons or else such as be knowen to be ouerwenyng fooles in their owne conceyte and be suche as doo the like by others Of these a man may talke his pleasure as well of them as with them without any disgrace to himselfe Prouided that if any quarrell rise thereby he be as readies of courage to maintaine it with his hand as of speeche to vtter it with his tongue