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Ann Rochester Robert Parsons He enjoyed a steddy temper of mind through the whole course of his sickness and repentance which must needs proceed not from a hurry or perturbation of mind or body arising from the fear of death or dread of Hell only but from an ingenious love to God and an uniform regard to virtue suitable to that solemn Declaration of his I would not commit the least sin to gain a kingdom And he had all possible symptoms of a lasting perseverance in this admirable Christian Resolution if God had restored him to health To which may be added his comfortable persuasions of God's accepting him to his mercy saying three or four days before his death I shall dye but Oh what unspeakable Glories do I see what ioys beyond thought or expression am I sensible of I am assured of God's mercy to me through Jesus Christ Oh how I long to dye and to be with my Saviour The time of his sickness and repentance was just nine weeks in all which space he was so much master of his reason and had so clear an understanding except about thirty hours in which he was delirous that he never dictated or spoke more composed in his life And therefore if any shall continue to say his Piety was the effect of madness or vapours the assertion is as silly as it is wicked And that the force of this great penitence may not be evaded by evil men who are resolved to harden their hearts against all convictions by saying it was done in a corner the truth hereof is very well known to all sorts of persons who in considerable numbers visited and attended him and particularly by those eminent Phisitians who were conversant with him in the whole course of his tedious sickness and who if any were competent judges whether he were in a phrensie or distracted who all declared that he had not the least Symptoms of it but was as sensible as at any time in his life and health And if any shall be still unsatisfied herein in this hard hearted generation it matters not let them at their cost be Unbelievers still so long as this excellent penitent enjoys the comfort of his repentance since from all these admirable signs we have great reason to believe comfortably that his repentance was real and his end happy and we may accordingly imitate the neighbours and Cosens of Elizabeth Luke 1.58 who when they heard how the Lord had shewed great mercy upon her came and rejoyced with her and herein we shall joyn with the whole Court of Heaven since our Blessed Saviour has told us Luke 15 7. I say unto you that joy shall he in heaven over one sinner that repenteth more then over ninety and nine Persons that need no repentance He dyed without convulsion or groan at Woodstock Park in Oxfordshire July 26. 1680. Postscript AN account of the duty and usefulness of communicating Experiences is already given I shall only add that if any should take offence at the publishing of these Experiences and judge it unmeet especially because ill men may make a bad use of them I desire such to consider that wicked Persons will take all opportunities to scandalize Religion though no occasion be given and they will likewise abuse the best of things to evil purposes Yet the Prophet David says Come and hear all ye that fear the Lord and I will declare what he hath done for my Soul Restore unto me the joy of my salvaton then will I teach transgressors thy ways amd sinners shall be converted unto thee Ps 51. 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in Prison I had dreadful apprehensions of Hell in my Soul and could do nothing but weep and mourn and pray counting my Life to be lost and yet I was more troubled for the wrath of God then the wrath of Man But at length it pleased God to give me comfort for one Night whilst I was bemoaning my self and in much Despair on a sudden the room was all in a flame and I thought my self in the midst of Lightning and being terrified I imagined I saw these words written against the Wall Thy sins are Pardoned and thy Life is hid with Christ in God This extraordinary Manifestation much eased the Trouble and Sorrow wherein I was but yet for want of Faith this comfort did not long continue with me for after that I thought I saw the Lord with such a wrathful countenance that I durst not look upon him and the next news that I heard was that I was ordered to be shot to Death Oh! then I cannot express the terrors that I was in my woful misery was such that neither Prayers reading of the Scriptures nor the pretious promises therein could afford me any Relief for I could not believe that I had any right to them and therefore could not lay hold of them In this dreadfull Distress I lay a condemned Man both in Soul and Body lamenting my wretched condition when opening the Bible in Joel 2.13 I saw it thus written Turn ye to the Lord God for he is Gracious and Merciful slow to Anger and of great Tenderness and Repenteth him of the Evil. Hereupon I pondered a while and said and is he such a God Well then he is my God and with that I gave my self up into his Hands resolving to relie upon him let him do what he would with me and on this Foundation I was Setled and satisfied A while after it pleased the Lord to deliver me out of the danger of Death and to set me at liberty from Prison but notwithstanding this great Mercy yet I must confess that I afterward found such opposition in my Heart against God as I could not believe had been in me I was grievously wounded for it and could have no quiet but went to Mr. W. and acquainted him with it who told me that I had fallen from my first Works and that I must Repent This rent my Heart and I had no Rest I returned from him and applyed to Prayer keeping that course continually till by degrees I was recovered out of that disconsolate condition and I praise God I have since found his favour and kindness extended toward me so that I am fully perswaded he loves me and will pardon my sins in Jesus Christ on whose Merits I relie in whose Righteousness I rest and by whose Grace I am now set free to serve him here and doubt not but to Reign with him hereafter F. B. V. Experiences of H. M. MY Father was a Gentleman of a fair Estate had many Children eleven Sons of us he was High Sheriff and when he dyed all our Family were broken dispersed and in confusion Two of us were brought up within five Miles of Glocester but I was placed an Apprentice in London and by this means my sorrows and troubles began to be great at first from the consideration of this suddain change which continued a while but about the 17th year of my Age my former grief was turned into another kind of Trouble namely Sorrow for my sins I was for three years together wounded with the sense of my sins and corruptions which were many I followed Sermons persuing the means was constant in Duties and Doing looking for Heaven that way I was very precise in outward formalities censuring all for Reprobates that wore their Hair long and not short above their Ears or that followed the common Modes and Fashions of those days Thus I continued Distracted in my Thoughts and wounded in my Conscience weeping often and bitterly and Praying earnestly but yet had no comfort till I heard that sweet Saint now in Heaven Dr. Sibbs by whose Means and Ministry I was brought to Peace and Joy in my Spirit his sweet Soul-melting Sermons won my Heart and Refreshed me much for by him I saw much of the goodness of God and had good Hope and Confidence in Christ Jesus and could overlook the World undervalue all Earthly things and was not afraid of Afflictions and though I was sometimes under the Spirit of Bondage again unto fear yet my Heart still held firm and my desires were all Heaven-ward I took delight to hear Funeral Sermons but Dr. Sibbs chiefly by whom I was effectually wrought upon and Satisfied with Comforts which I hope will never leave me till I come to Everlasting Rest H. M. VI. Experiences of Mr. T. H. Minister of the Gospel I was but young when I first came under Convictions of Soul and my Heart being warmed by a zealous Ministry which put me much upon Duty I used to read the Scriptures every Night and to Repeat Sermons often and so I spent the first Scene of my Youth till I was sent by my Friends to London where I lived a year or two during that time as often as I saw any Minister I could not but weep and always wisht that I might be one my self to be able to Preach too after this I was sent to one of the Universities in England but being wild with youthful company was removed to the Colledge of Dublin where I continued till the horrid Popish Rebellion broke out in 1641. At which time I left it and went to Liverpool in Lancashire where I Preached some years yet all this while I was but formal and as the young Man in the Gospel said he had kept all these things from his Youth so I was from from my youth Religious well given loving the means and following them hearing Sermons and seeking to serve God But alas I was yet all this while in Darkness and did not know it but afterwards I saw that I was blind and carnal For I began to be in great Doubts and Troubles and very much clouded in my Spirit and was exceedingly tyed and bound up for a time under the Sense of my formal Holiness and sins but the Lord was pleased to give me light Once as I was walking sadly alone upon the Mountains it pleased the Lord so to influence me by his Spirit which seemed to be immediately poured out upon me that my Soul was satisfied in Jesus Christ and my Heart was filled with Heavenly Joy and Peace and with most Ravishing contemplations which continued without a cloud for several weeks together and gave me assured Hopes of the Love of God and ever since I have lived in the Righteousness of the Lord Jesus Christ and though I have met with many storms and clouds yet they have all passed away and cannot hinder me from Salvation so long as Christ who is my Lord and Saviour is above them and I doubt not