little tho they are giving us never so much but commands us not to rail and jeer at them that jeer and rail at us but to pray for our Enemies and to do good to those that spitefully use us God having instituted it as a Fundamental Law to Mankind not to do our Neighbours any harm in Body Goods or good Name but to do them all the good we can in every of them In short this is the sad and unequal deportment of most vain handsom Ladies both as to themselves and others which is to be angry with their Neighbours without a Cause and never to be angry at themselves tho they have one many of the vain Ladies esteeming it a sufficient ground of quarrel and anger at other young Ladies for being more handsom than they but forget at the same time to be offended at themselves for being less pious than them in not loving their Neighbours as themselves for if they did they would never offer what they would not take But so vain and wicked is our Age as common Custom and little Consideration makes many of the vain witty Ladies to fancy that Romantick Lies and detracting Jeers are but Wind which if granted yet it cannot be denied but the often repetition may unite them into a storm of sins for does not experience teach us that light flakes of Snow that singly scarce weigh any thing being but a kind of half congealed Atoms yet do often by their long united Confluence swell into an ability of destroying Houses and Families in spite of their greatest resistance Solomon says Prov. 16.27 That an ungodly Mans lips is as a burning fire and in the very next Verse seems to explain what he means by a burning fire a froward Man soweth strife and a whisperer separateth chief Friends as I said before how common is it among the vain Ladies of the times to lessen their handsom Neighbours beauty meerly on design that by Eclipsing it they might make their own shine out the Clearer and often to raise scandalous Reports to blemish her Reputation among her Friends and Lovers it being indeed too common a practice among them to whisper about ill Reports of their Neighbours as told them abroad from others when really they were Coin'd at home by themselves O vain Ladies if you will not for your own and shame sake at least for vertue and honour sake abandon raising all wicked scandals on your Neighbours and banish from your practice all impertinent senseless strifes all censuring twatles and sharp offensive scoffs which tho a mode vice is so great a Crime as it truly requires a strict Repentance and a high Reparation for the offence to the Persons so injured and that such scandalous Jeerers would for the future as David says Keep a Bridle in their Mouth that they offend not with their Tongue and so new mould and well regulate it as instead of using it as an Engine to rack their Neighbours Reputation with they may henceforward employ and consecrate it to the setting out and stretching forth their vertue and good name and let all your strife be in a pious Emulation of vertue and holiness and in religious endeavors who shall excel and take place in the true and constant practice of them in their lives and conversation for in them consists not only the greatest wisdom highest wit but also the best breeding and most sublime and splended beauty being the everlasting one of holiness besides that of pure honour indeed for Gospel Heraldry must ever be the very best for the greatest Monarch in this World must live a sinner but the meanest Woman in it by her living a godly and vertuous life may die a Saint and therefore it must certainly be much better to live well and so die happily than to be born great left rich or look handsom for the beauty of a fair delicate Complexion may be a Womans own purchase not Natures gift and her high Title and great Estate may be left her by her friends without being in the least merited by her self but to be highly pious and truly vertuous must most certainly be the true and lawful Issue of a Womans own Religious inclinations Therefore I shall conclude this Discourse with this undeniable Truth That true goodness is true greatness and that Lady will be the greatest in the other World that lives the best in this THE TWELFTH DISCOURSE Of French Fashions and Dresses now used in England by the modish Ladies and young Sparks DIvines tell us that perfect life may be seen in short measures Painters assure us that exact beauty may be drawn in small proportions and experience shews us that an infinity of words is made of a few letters and 't is approv'd by the great Wits and Poets of the Stage that a short Prologue may suit well with a long Play and since I do not here pretend nor indeed so much as ambition to keep company with their great Wit I hope they will admit me to follow their short measures and by their example justifie this my small discourse from appearing very unsuitable to this large Theme Solomon in his Character of a Covetous Person says He is one whom God hath given riches and honour to so that he wanteth nothing of all that he desires but God giveth him not the power to eat thereof which is an evil Disease because such a Man wanteth even what he hath what can such a miserable be call'd better than a sad wretch that makes himself a voluntary Slave to labour in the Mines of his own wealth and Vassal-like only to enjoy the drudgery part for his own share making his wealth a burden without reaping any true pleasure or advantage by it so that such a Man tho' he be never so rich must die in debt to himself for he strips himself of necessaries during his own life to make his Children a Wardrobe after his death I am sure the prodigality of our London Gallants is after a quite different Manner for so they can but make a Wardrobe for themselves and Misses during their own lives many of them care not tho' they leave their Children in a condition to want necessaries after their death which too many of them can justifie by woful experience several of their Fathers Estates that did belong to them as their Birth-right by their Parents luxury pride and folly have been made a sacrifice to the extravagant expences and vain profuseness of their Mistrisses pride and their own sottishnefs as that they have left nothing to their Heirs of Inheritance but the wind as Solomon expresses it Prov. 11.29 The certain loss of their fathers Estate and the uncertain getting another for themselves if they can I have read of a Philosopher that was perswaded by his friends to leave his retirement for a little time to see a fine Shop plentifully stor'd with all manner of rich things and fine knacks and being asked what he thought of all
The Second Discourse 〈◊〉 meer Beauty-Love with some of the vile Arts and wicked Deceits many Gallants use to ruin their Mistresses Reputation under a false pretence of true Friendship And of the great folly of such VVomen who delight in censuring others but slight all others censuring them because they fancy they do not deserve it with some useful Advices thereon p. xxxii The Third Discourse Of young Mens great folly in adoring and over-praising all young handsom Ladies and their greater vanity in receiving it and believing them p. 1 The Fourth Discourse Of the extraordinary governing power VVomens Beauty now exercises over most young Men. p. 21 The Fifth Discourse Of the Inconstancy most Ladies especially such as are cry'd up Beauties and the folly of any Man that believes he 's fully acquainted with and soley possess'd of a vain Beauties Heart and can give good reasons for the various Motions of her Love-changes p. 42 The Sixth Discourse Of Marriage and of VVives who usurp a Govering Power over their Husbands which is now so common as 't is almost become the general Grievance of the Nation p. 5â— The Seventh Discourse Of the inequality of many Marriages awd of the Inconstancy of most VVives that Men Marâ—â—â— for meer Beauty or their Parents Match forbaâ— Mony with the sad end that usually attends suâ— Matches p. 6â— The Eighth Discourse Against Maids Marrying for meer Love or only 〈◊〉 please their Parents Inclinations tho' quite contrary to their own p. 8â— The Ninth Discourse Against VVIDOVVS Marrying p. 9â— The Tenth Discourse Against keeping of MISSES p. 11â— The Eleventh Discourse Of the vain Folly of such VVomen as think to sheâ— their VVit by Jeering at and Censuring of their Neighbours p. 12â— The Twelfth Discourse Of the French Fassions and Dresses lately us'd 〈◊〉 England by the modish Ladies and your sparks p. 13â— The Thirteenth Discourse Of VVorldly Praises which all Ladies love to receive but few strive to deserve and the sad eâ— of it and them when they come to Die p. 15â— The Fourteenth Discourse Vseful advices in order to the vain modish Ladies we Regulating their Beauty and Lives p. 17â— THE FIRST DISCOURSE Of some of the common ways many vertuous Wives take to lose their Reputation tho' they keep their Chastity being vertuous in their inward Intentions but indiscreet in their Talk and outward Actions and Men judge by what they see not by what Women say they mean I Shall not here Reader pretend to present you with the Sum Total of the numerous and various Ways many handsom Women take to be ill talk'd of for that I am sure would be a Task as much above my Power to write as I fancy 't would be above your Patience to read and he that can perform that great work must need at least a Prophet's Knowledge and a Job's Patience and truly I pretend to neither Nor have I so much as a Thought of undertaking singly to tell you all the Faults Arts Deceits and Indiscretions of all Wives much less of all Women since I fancy if all the Husbands in the whole World were assembled in one general Council they could no more sum up all their Wive's Faults than cure all their Vices for Miracles are ceas'd to the whole World but the Papist of whose Faith I thank God I am not of But of this opinion I am that 't is sufficient for every Married Man to carry his own Burden and Proportion in the Matrimonial Yoke with Discretion and Patience which latter is a Vertue their Wives will be sure to make them practise if they be not more fortunate than the generality of Husbands are and I think ever will be if one may judge of the future by the present I shall name but few and write but little of the many and several ways diverse virtuous I do not say discreet Wives take to be ill talked of and shall here skip troubling you with a Character of a vile sort of scandalous Wives that are commonly known and publickly branded for such who have by their wicked Lives render'd themselves so contemptible as they are to be us'd by all vertuous Women as we do persons infected with the Plague We are not bound to go see how they do but we are oblig'd to avoid coming where they are both for our own sake and the sake of others and to remember to observe Solomon's good Advice as to a vertuous Woman's carriage towards an ill scandalous Woman Remove thy way far from her and come not near the door of her House These are a sort of beastly Women that take upon them the vile employment of common censuring and publick rayling at all strict Vertuous Women arming themselves with downright Impudence having lost all their shame with their Vertue for they that part with the one soon casts off the other And because they have render'd themselves contemptible by their ill Lives they strive to make good Women appear bad by their foul Tongues scandalizing the Vertues by all the ill Reports they can invent being like those Solomon names Who cannot sleep without having done some mischief being so abominably bad as their very Parents for Friends they have none want Confidence to excuse them and they Impudence to justify themselves These Herd of beastly Women the Vertuous are bound in Charity to pity their bad Condition but in Prudence to shun their ill Company and so I 'll leave them with a red Cross on their Door and a Lord have mercy on their bad lives The first sort of Wives I shall here name and but name are a kind of Wives that have the Happiness to be thought vertuous by many but the Unhappiness to be esteem'd vain and indiscreet by most they are careful to keep themselves Chast but careless of what others say against their being so and because they think they do no ill value not what ill others say they do which is but a sad sort of Logick and an ill way of managing their Reputation since tho' a Wive's Innocency may satisfy her own Conscience yet it cannot protect her Husband's Honour nor secure her own since publick Censure may blemish both if an outward discreet carriage doth not prevent Therefore doubtless a Wife who is truly vertuous and truly desires to be esteem'd such is as much concern'd in Honour to keep a good Name as she is bound in Conscience to lead a good Life and the Wife which in point of Reputation values little what others say seldom care much what she her self doth for what bad Censures she casts on others or others cast on her and a Wife or Woman of that ill Temper usually loves more to commit a hundred faults than to repent of one or be told of any never considering that a handsom Woman's leaving a Vice argues no defect in her Body but a vertuous inclination in her Mind For the very best Women in the World are subject to Faults and Errors as well
and I believe still is among Persons of Quality near as great a scandal for a Lady to suffer a Man to sit on her Bed as to admit him to lie in it As for instance I remember when King Charles II. liv'd with Queen Mother in Paris a French Gentleman of good Quality and great Estate fell desperately in love with an English Lady so as to desire to Marry her which I count Desperate Love and the Queen Mother had in a manner made up the Match but by an unfortunate accident I mean only for the Lady a near Kinsman and Friend of hers and Counsellor in all her concerns excepting those of her private Amours came purposely out of England to assist her in setling her Jointure and other Marriage concerns and this Kinsman of hers ignorant of the nice Punctilio's of the French Ceremonies did that he might the more easily hear her and she him he not knowing nor she not remembring how scandalous 't was for a Man to sit on a Lady's Bed which is no very strange thing in England where it may be done without the least harm tho' it cannot in France without the greatest scandal but unfortunately this Lady's Lover came in to visit her at the very nick of time that he was sitting on her Bed and the Monsieur seeing a Man sitting on her Bed was so surpris'd at the Sight and scandaliz'd at the Action that tho' the Man's great Age had been of it self a sufficient Antidote against his Jealousy especially knowing how near of Kin he was to her and how few days he declar'd staying with her yet the Monsieur without using any Words or taking any Consideration immediately left her and her Chamber and could never be persuaded to return to her again This is only to mind you That the Custom of a Kingdom makes Rules and gives Laws in it's own Dominions which no Woman ought to break if she desires to keep her Reputation whole And that Woman that knows she shall lose her Reputation if she will admit a Man to sit on her Bed in my Opinion deserves to lose her good name for doing it let the Action in it self and her intention as to her self be never so innocent But this severe Custom in France is nothing in comparison to the Severities or rather Cruelties that are generally practised in Italy by Husbands towards their Wives for there all young Gentlewomen are kept and bred up in a strict Confinement in Nunneries till married and when they are so are kept but a kind of Prisoners in their own Houses So that all the Writ of Ease a Maid gets by marrying is but the exchanging one Prison for another which renders them the more eager after liberty as penn'd up Rivers swell for being confin'd and run more violent when they get their freedom for having been debarr'd of it and hinder'd from their natural Course so most of these imprison'd Wives are kept chast by their Husbands strict confine ment of them and careful watchfulness over them rather than by the Motions of their own natural Temper or vertuous Inclinations But for my own part as I utterly detest the Severities Husbands use to their Wives in Italy so I do not altogether approve the great Freedoms that many Husbands do allow their Wives in England or their Wives will allow themselves some Husbands granting them such large Ranges of Liberty as they by it often shew more alonfidence in their Wives than Discretion in themselves Since a large liberty without a suitable proportion of prudence to well manage it often causes high Extravagancies and foul Excesses and therefore I believe as many Husbands have made their Wives dishonest by too much mistrusting them for Revenge is very sweet and natural to Women so I also believe some Wives have been made dishonest by their Husbands too much trusting them Opportunity often makes a Thief which had not perhaps been a Thief but for the opportunity The Italians have a certain way of reasoning as to the securing their Wives by saying That no Wife can be dishonest without an Opportunity to be so Time and Action being inseparable therefore say they ever keep your Wife from an Opportunity and you will ever keep her honest But God forbid that all Men that have opportunity should be Thieves or that all Women that allow Men Opportunity should allow them Enjoyment For tho' the Italians say as true That there can be no Enjoyment without Opportunity so the English say as true That there may be Opportunity without Enjoyment I Remember in Rome upon a discourse with an Italian of the great freedoms Wives were allow'd in England I heard him swear a great Oath That he would not trust the great God with his Wife when she was alone in Bed And asked me not only with a serious but furious Countenance if it were possible that strange Report could be true That the Married Women in England had liberty to go abroad with Men and to receive Visits from them in their Chambers nay sometimes when they were in Bed I assur'd him 't was very certain That the Women of the highest Quality greatest Esteem and best Reputation do both go abroad with Men in their Company and receive Men's Visits in their Cambers and sometimes by Men at the usual visiting hours when they were in Bed and by near Kindred at all times and that this Freedom was allow'd by vertuous and great Women to Men without the least scandal for neerness of Kin tho' it cannot greatly foul Actions yet it can protect Freedoms But for a Married Woman to admit the liberty to a Man that 's no way related to her self Husband or Family except upon some good ground or extraordinary occasion argues in my Opinion great Weakness and high Indiscretion being a thing I cannot with prudence approve nor a Wife I think with discretion admit for tho' some may favour such a Freedom with an Innocent construction yet others may brand it with a scandalous Interpretation and usually indiscreet Freedoms produce dishonourable Censures And that married Man that allows young Gallants to visit his Wife more than ordinary must allow Men to speak more than ordinary of her for it or they will be sure to allow it themselves Therefore a strict vertuous Wife ought seriously to reflect on the Hazard she runs the Folly she commits and the Dishonour she may suffer in her Reputation by allowing a Man that 's unfitly qualified so great a freedom Now as an Antidote to prevent reacting the like Indiscretion I shall advise that Wife that admits such Freedom to a Man at unvisiting hours seriously to consider and soberly to reason and argue with her self by supposing that this her now dear Friend she 's so fond of and so much relies in should chance to become her Enemy and brag he has enjoy'd her for such things have been certainly done formerly and may possibly be done again whether she can after serious consideration and
appointed for Women to govern over Men next of course follows the manner how they Ruled and that we have an account of in few words in the 12 verse of that Chapter aforementioned by the Prophet O my people says the Lord Those that is the Women that lead ye cause you to err and destroy the ways of thy Paths Thus we find that error and destruction are the effects of Womens ruling power it being contrary to the ways of Truth for it causeth Error and the Laws of Nature of Reason I cannot say of common Practice and it was here appointed to Women not as a favour but for a punishment as an effect of Gods wrath against his People it being a Reverse of the Fundamental Law which was made by God almost as soon as the World I am sure as early as the first Man in it for Sacred writ tells that 't was laid as a load on the first Woman for her disobedience to her Maker that she should be subject to her Husband and though to be so now is but the practice of very few Wives of our Age yet that do's not hinder it from being the duty of all from the beginning of the World Therefore let all our high spirited governing Women who make their silly Husbands and foolish Gallants such slaves to their Power because admirers of their beauty remember what one very well observ'd That the day of the date of Womens Power over Man was the day of the date of her sin against God It being most clear and plain that from Adams time the Woman ought to be in subjection to the Man and therefore S. Paul said I will not have the Woman usurp an authority over the Man and seems to give the Reason for first Adam was made then Eve Seneca well observes in saying There is something of meanness in the most seeming gallant and inviting sin I am sure there is a great meaness of Spirit in Mens so subjecting themselves to Womens power since such must in effect declare that they have lost not only the Courage of Men but the very Nature of Gentlemen what did I say they have lost the Nature of Gentlemen nay I might have added the very natural right and reason of humanity and deserve to loose the great honour of being English Men for such Petty-Coat Men ought to be Transplanted into the Suburbs of England Wales where the Language of that Country fits exactly their effeminate humor who by a kind of Welch Paradox call the Man hur not he and indeed hur suits betten than he with such a sort of female Gentry who are composed of such unmasculine Spirits Really when I reflect on what Crowds there are of this pitiful rank of Men who take so great pride and delight in being constant adorers and humble servants to their Mistrisses beauty not in railery but in reality who are as very happy in their own conceit if their Mistrisses do oblige them with a kind word or favourable look as if the Day Star from above had come to visit them and to lead them into eternal light and that all the Aspects of the Stars had combin'd together to be propitious to them Yet after all 't is a very great pity that these sort of Mistrisses do not bestow on these kind of servants Lace to their Coats for sure they are fools enough to deserve it and I see no reason why such who are so ambitious of their service should refuse to wear their Liveries and be out of Countenance to be known Fools by their Coats when they are not asham'd to deserve that name by their actions Solomon says a slothful Man shall be covered with rags and so indeed ought such Men who are dull and drowsie in the exercise of their own power and over-active in their obedience to Womens for which they well deserve to wear the Colours of their Mistrisses Soveraignity and their slavery on the ragg'd Fools Coat of their own simplicity Sure all such Men as will debase themselves into such an effeminate servitude as to render it both easie and habitual to them cannot pretend in the least to possess a noble or generous spirit for that must be averse to it since it makes a Man not ony unfit to serve his King and Country the duty of every good Subject but even to be useful to himself and family Whereas if young Men studied noble Sciences instead of courting handsom Women who can only divert their Time probably corrupt their Lives whereas the practice of vertue and the study of Men and business with other useful Sciences will refine and strengthen their knowledge fortifie prudence in their actions kindle Magnanimity in their hearts raise glorious desires in their minds and so polish and regulate all the weighty actions of their lives so as to render them fit to serve their Country both in War and Peace and themselves and families to boot which advantage can never redound on either by courting and serving beauty never so long for meer beauty sake And I wonder your beauty Courtiers do not observe that great beauties seldom esteem the long attendance or great services of their Adorers as they ought because they value more their own beauty than they should which makes it common for such Women to ruin their Lovers liberty to proclaim their own Soveraignty over it and therefore sure it cannot appear very unreasonable that such Men as will make themselves Slaves to Womens beauty should pass for fools in sober Mens thoughts Indeed there 's one Law and but one Law I know which though a French one yet as great lovers as our English Ladies are of the French fashions they are so far from esteeming or allowing it as they will not endure so much as to hear it nam'd and that 's called the Salick Law which in France prohibits the female Sex from wearing the Breeches and Reigning which our high spirited governing Women in England so hate the Name of as there was a report they were about calling a Parliament of Women to vote it high Treason against the Power of their present Government to but name bringing that Law into England but as good fortune would have it they could not agree among themselves about chusing a Speaker for every one would be one and knowing where all will speak aloud none can be heard they were necessitated in Prudence to dissolve that Parliament design But truly in my opinion at the high rate of power Womens beauty now Governs the Ladies have no cause to be concern'd that the Breeches are not given to them by Act of Parliament since it is freely bestowed on them by the Custom of the Country and Custom you know makes Laws and those as binding as any she Act of Parliament since they are ratified and confirmed by the Major part of the Lords Spiritual and Temporal as well as the Knights Burgesses and Commons who by many Signs and Tokens give great cause of fear that
Institution of Marriage which is pure and comfortable in it self tho more are made miserable than happy by it Marriage being a Sacred Order not only as old as our father Adam but almost as Nature her self for it began with the World and is not like to end but with it and can truly boast both of the greatest Antiquity for its Parent and the first rank of Miracles for its honour for Scripture tells us that the first Miracle our blessed Saviour did in Canaa was at a Wedding and we read in Genesis that God had no sooner finished Creating the World but he presently acted a Miracle in it by making a Marriage for the perfection of which he miraculously divided one body into two and united two bodies into one And in those blessed days of purity and innocency before sin began to reign in the World God the great Maker and wise disposer of all things thought one Husband sufficient for one Wife and one Wife for one Husband but in our wicked Age of excess wantonness and inconstancy there are crowds of Men and Women that list themselves into the holy Order of Matrimony that will not confine themselves to those limited bounds which God himself gave and they themselves vow'd to keep but will rather choose those Adulterous courses God has forbid than use those lawful means which God has given by Marriage But 't is a sin descends to us from our father Adam to leave all the lawful fruit in the Garden to eat of the forbidden Tree And now I fancy it need not pass for Raillery or a meer Romantick expression to say 'T would be now another Wedding Miracle in England to see our vain modish Ladies as just and obedient to their Husbands as they ought to be or indeed our foppish young Gallants as kind and constant to their Wives as they should be for we are got into such a Brood of ill Wives and bad Husbands they commonly hunt in Couples one still helping to make the other as infamous as they can and so as many of the bad Wives think one Husband too little so many of these ill Husbands think one Wife too much Now if any wonder at this new fashion of ranking in writing the Wife before the Husband I fancy they will not much admire at it when I tell them my reason is because 't is the Wives right from the very beginning of the World to take place and go before her Husband but yet you ought not to be either pleas'd or proud of it when I remember you in what manner you took place and went before your Husband which was only in sinful disobedience a misery Wives ought ever to mourn for but never to boast of and which is so far from a new fashion as we may read in Scripture 't is as very old as the first Woman and afforded Adam no other excuse for his being perswaded to disobedience by his Wife than that the Woman beguiled me and I did eat S. Paul orders the Wife to be subject to her Husband and gives this reason for it for first Adam was made then Eve to shew 't is the Mans place to go first and the Woman to follow the Man and not the Man to follow the Woman so that 't is most clear by the Law of God the Woman was made for the Man and formed the weaker Vessel but by our new English practice it seems to pass for good currant modish doctrin that the Man was created for the Woman and made the weaker Vessel else sure Men would never endure that so very many Wives should rule their Husbands and so very few Husbands should govern their Wives The subtil Lawyers that can talk the craftiest Men out of their mony some giving them indeed only but talk for their mony cannot yet talk their Wives into due obedience many of them only laughing at their Husbands threats of bringing Writs of Errors and Actions of Trespass against them for usurping and practising an unlawful governing power over them which tho contrary to Magna Charta and the fundamental Law of this Kingdom and all other Laws whatsoever except that of Custom yet Lawyers Wives will keep this Law in full force I am sure they cannot say and vertue for they break all Laws both divine and human by it Nor can our Ministers with all their Canonical gravity Divine Rhetorick and eloquent Preaching teach their Wives so effectually S. Pauls lesson of submission as to make them pay them so much as the Tythe of obedience for if they could sure they would never suffer them to wear such rich Clothes which is not only unsuitable to the gravity and decency of a Clergy Mans Wife but very contradictory to the Apostle Pauls doctrin who orders in general all Women and sure Ministers Wives above all not to adorn themselves with rich but modest Apparel nor can our great Merchants that Plow the Seas with their Ships to all Kingdoms of the World in all their long Voyages and great dealings purchase any considerable quantity of this rare Commodity call'd Wife obedience and let me tell them not for their comfort if they can buy none of it abroad they will hardly find any given them at home Nay I may yet go farther and say that the greatest and most wise Statesmen with all their Politicks cannot make their Wives pay them their just obedience and I fancy their Husbands esteem it a great part of their wisdom and prudence not to expect it because probably they in great wisdom do seriously reflect on the state of their Adam who though he had all the Wit and Wisdom Policy and Power of the whole World solely and intirely in himself yet when he got a Wife or rather a Wife got him we all know to his high shame and our great misery that she govern'd him not he her by which all Husbands may receive this small Consolation that Wives usurping the Government is no new Error but as old almost as the Creation All I shall say to our Nobility and Gentry on this sad Subject of Wives governing their Husbands is only to desire most of them to lay their hands on their Hearts and then tell me if seeing is not believing In truth one need go no farther than the Streets to meet many Men that do not govern their Wives but one must travel the whole Kingdom over to meet a few that do We find that Springs which move only by the meer course of Nature will mount no higher than their Heads because 't is against Nature to do it and if we may believe S. Paul and he is no good Christian that does not he tells us that the Husband is the head of the Wife and if the Wife will but believe that sure she cannot tell how to deny this that Africa it self can produce nothing more monstrous than for a Woman to grow above her head which being the uppermost part of the body nothing can grow above
she 'll tell you she has heard a story which if as true as strange is a rare one That the reason that Stags live so very long is that when they find themselves to decay they swallow a live Serpent and as it consumes in their body they revive in their strength and Spirits So possibly a young Woman will say That she did not Marry an old Man for being rich in Years but Mony and because she found her Fortune decaying and almost quite decayed therefore she swallowed a Marriage with an old Man as the Stag does a Serpent in hopes that as her Husband consumes and dies in her bosom so she may revive in her sprightly gay humor and please her self with the delightful thoughts of the wealth he will leave her and the ways she will Intrigue to spend it in the fanciful hopes she has of suddenly gaining a young Husband suitable both to her Youth and aiery Inclinations There is another sort of Women but indeed their number is very small who being not handsom in their own opinion and therefore may besafely concluded very ugly in that of all others who to supply the defects of nature and age give out they are very rich and that they hope will make amends for all Gold being always young handsom and taking to all sorts of Men and Ages for Mony answers all things and by these reports of their Wealth tho often false they decoy young Fops who have lost their Annuity at Play or spent it in Debauchery to Court them for their fame of having much Mony and too eagerly press the Marrying them for it Swearing that they Love their persons more than their Mony valuing them a thousand times before it and no wonder that they that swear so commonly for nothing should now lye for much Mony for in real truth they only put the Widow before the Mony as we do in common speaking the Box before the Jewels which though first is altogether inconsiderable to the latter as only containing that Riches which it self makes no part of And many of these old rich Widows are so doatingly senseless that because their Mony Courters swear they are handsom they verily believe they are so and credit others words before their own eyes tho their spectacles are on which renders some so sottishly impudent as to tell their Gallants that tho their beauty is in the fall of the Leaf yet Autumn can breed Lovers as well as the Spring does when in truth an old withered Autumn face does but Chill the blood and dispirit the vigour of the most active and resolute Courtier and therefore a Spring beauty can only enflame the heart and tho possibly a young Man may be sometimes foolishly taken with an old Womans great wit good humor or rather greater riches yet 't is I think impossible he can be really in Love with her deform'd face person or age which must quench the fire of any amorous flames in a youthful or vigorous heart Therefore I shall advise all such Women to be so prudent as to yield to the seasons of Age as they must to that of the Year and not hope to turn Winter into Summer or Autumn into Spring but instead of striving for what 's impossible yield to what 's reasonable and submit to these true Measures That Eighteen is the gay sprightly blossom age that a young Womans Life shines out in its brightest splendor and beauty That Thirty is the stale year of a Maid and the worst age of a Wife I mean that 's an ill one because a Wife at Thirty is old enough to be ugly and young enough to live long but a Woman that is so far advanced in years as the frigid Zone of Sixty ought in all reason to banish all vain Love thoughts as to the youthful pleasures of this world and to fix them on the other so as to live only in order to die imitating the good old Woman named in the Gospel Luke 2.37 Who kept in the Temple who fasted and prayed to God night and day Indeed it becomes old Women much better to frequent the Church with the good old Godly Matrons so renown'd for gravity and religion in former days than to visit the Park or the Play with their vain young Gallants lest their old Dress and Antick Faces should make Men say such a one is more fit to be a Spectacle than a Spectator wants good Mens Prayers rather than young Mens Praises and is more apt to create thoughts of Mortality than to raise motions of Love really I am of opinion that if 't were possible to turn beauty into the same nature of content that the little Kingdom of England would swarm now more with handsom Women than the Country of Palestine did ever with fighting Men of which Scripture makes mention of many hundred thousands for than every ugly Woman young or old as thought her self handsom as most do must be really handsom only for think it as well as all those that believe themselves Content must be Content or else they could not believe themselves so therefore all old and ugly Women that are not past all years of discretion tho they are of beauty should never strive for impossibilities for youth will assoon come to the aged as beauty to the ugly but since beauty will not come to content you be you content without it and strive for that you may obtain which is the beauty of holiness which infinitely excels all others it being much better to live well than look so and to have a good soul than a fine face that being earthly and ever fading but a pure soul is heavenly and never decays being everlasting In short that Man who is so simple to Marry great Age for meer Mony when that 's spent and you know that Mony like Love cannot always last all the use of consolation I can think of is to send for a Minister to give him some spiritual advice of which he may perchance receive some to ease the trouble of his mind but as to the bodily distemper or plague of his broken infirmity I am sure there can be no remedy but that of death for indeed it may be fitly said of a young Mans Marrying an old ugly Woman what the Apostle said of a greater folly in another sense be that doth so offends against his own body and truly such a one hath in my opinion no other plea left him to excuse his folly than Adam had to excuse his first Sin The Woman beguiled me I say in Cases like this possibly S. Paul might have thought it equal for so indeed it is things rightly considered for such men to suffer or rather indeed conquer the disturbance of a lustful burning than endure the plague and continual misery of an ill old ugly Wife that can neither please the fancy nor satisfie the appetite and therefore coming to such a sad Marriage is like coming to the age of fourscore after which
those rare things I am thinking said he what a World of things are here I do not want for what 's more than we use is more than we need I am confident if one of our fine London Ladies had been shewn that sight and asked that question her answer had been what a World of things I want that are not here which much justifies a Writers saying that the ancient Latins called Womens Wardrobe Mundus a World yet I find in the Map of Womens ornamental Dresses reckoned by the Prophet Isaiah the sum total of them there named to be but twenty one which clearly shews the vast difference between the twenty one years of Men and the twenty one Dresses of Women for by the Law of our Kingdoms all Mens years under one and twenty are not allow'd to reach discretion but our Prophet seems here to say that by the Law of God all Womens Dresses that amount to much more that pass beyond twenty one must exceed all discretion for certainly they must be too many for Women to wear whom God declares too many for him to like And tho without any dispute 't is a sin to doubt that those ornamental Dresses which the Creator thinks too many no Woman Creature but ought to esteem more than enough yet so extravagant and phantastical are many of our fine Ladies and Gallants as they are so far from esteeming that Number sufficient as they send almost every week to Paris for such supplies of new fashion Dresses as one might as soon Climb up to the Top of all Numbers as to hope to reckon the numberless variety of Womens Dresses there belonging much more Rigging to set out a young Lady than a Man of War so hard 't is to cast up the variety of parts as now adays belong to compleat a great Modish Ladies Dress and Equipage And therefore I fancy an old Philosopher gave both a good Reason and true Character of the fashion of rich Dresses That 't was the deadly catching Disease of Women and the foolish passion of men Indeed I find no reason to believe any of these kind of Ladies are knowing in Philosophy because they cannot be lovers of Wisdom that are haters of Discretion which makes a main part of it But I have a great deal of reason to believe that they are knowing in Satans Arithmatick and too well understand sinful Subtraction and vain Multiplication since we find so many of them can Subtract the Ten Commandments to the scarce keeping of one and multiply the twenty one ornamental Dresses to the using of hundreds And the worst of it is that not one of these twenty one Dresses are a kin to those S. Peter advised the Women of his time to wear which was not putting on Gold or curling Hair or what is Corruptible but the Ornaments of a meek and quièt Spirit 1 Pet. 3.3 4. which exactly suits the true beauty of Religion which the Apostle says is of great price in the sight of God for that will render Women of so pious a Temper as tho the youthful gaiety of their human Nature may make them think of the vain dresses of the times yet their sanctified minds will never let them forget to be true followers of the state of Eternity Indeed 't is a hard measuring Cast whether their variety of vain extravagant Dresses deserves more Mens sober pity or contempt most I am sure are fitter for either than my description yet I must be Charitable to them tho they are far from being so to themselves as to wish that these our fine young modish Ladies and their Gallants would keep more Commandments and use fewer Dresses that they might thereby lessen their own particular vanities and moderate the general English out-cry against French fashions which many think have not only over-run but near destroyed all our noble ancient great way of Living and grave kinds of sober Dresses Sure if our fine young Ladies and great Modists would but a little seriously reflect of what most of their fine Clothes are made they would not be so proud to glory in what they really ought to be asham'd off for the fine Silks we wear are but the workings of poor little Worms and our finest Cloth is made of the Wooll of Sheep so that our covering was but that of Beasts till our pride and vanity robb'd them of it And indeed our great adored Mistris Mony which all of all sorts receive with so great joy and entertain with so high delight as the only true happy and undecaying Mistris in this World for all Love her passionatly at once and what 's yet stranger than all both Sexes are still constant in their eager love and great fondness of her nay Solomon had so great an esteem and value for Money as he said it answered all things yet if we truly look into its Extraction we shall find it as very mean as that of our Clothes for as Seneca well observes That Gold and Silver were still mixt and never kept better Company than Earth and Dust till avarice and ambition raised and parted them and so they became our Masters as well as Mistrisses O how strangely is Apparel Metamorphosed We read in Genesis that it was first used to hide our Shame but now 't is worn to shew our Pride and God knows if we truly consider we are very far from having any reason to boast of our Apparel since 't is but the cover of Shame and Sin and therefore we ought to wear it but as deep mourning for the great loss of our dear friend Innocency Nor can any deny but that Mourning is a Garment fitter according to the strictest niceties of our very present Modes to denote true sadness than set out vain glory to manifest grief than express joy yet so evil is our present Age as many of the wicked brood of elder Brothers who as one said pray for their Fathers lives but not their living plainly shew at their Fathers death in what a manner they are concern'd for his loss not theirs by their chearful Countenance and Gay Lives which clearly Proclaim that they Mourned rather because their Fathers lived so long than died so soon and so make their long funeral Cloaks which usually weigh heavier on their Backs than the cause of them on their Hearts rather a Habit of great Joy than true Mourning But real Mourning hath nothing to do with our French Dresses therefore this discourse shall have no more to do with it and I will now return to my Subject and mind you that the French have brought into England so many strange Fashions as 't is to be feared our young fry of Nobility and Gentry will esteem piety and vertue as things quite out of fashion and use and indeed their Lives cannot be more extravagant and vain than their Apparel if I can properly say they have any left Certainly if Sir John Suckling had lived to these times he might well have added to
that pithy saying of his This trifle Woman will unman us all and uncloath us too for Doublets are quite left off by all the Modists And for the Breeches most of our young Sparks and some of the old Fops have lost them also being generally given by our Gallants to their Mistrisses and by the meer Country Gentlemen to their Wives which by the by is a new Mode that contradicts the old Law to confound the Habits of several Sexes so that if our Women increase thus in Power and our Men continue so in folly 't is very probable that those of the next Age may see our English Modists pictur'd as they do Truth that 's naked These sort of Men if I may properly call them Men that have lost their Manhood having left off their Doublets and yielded up their Breeches have nothing on to wear but their Coats which may indeed serve to cover their Nakedness but can never hide their Shame for so degenerating is their temper as to make themselves servants to Women whom by their birth-right they ought to rule over as Lords and Masters and what is worse and stranger than all this to be pleased and glory in their servitude I read of a great Politician that Counselled his Prince to reflect on the dangerous consequence that might happen by admitting his Subjects to receive Pensions from forrein Kings and his reason was that forrein food was apt to breed forrein blood in them And indeed 't is a saying as very true as old that use is a second nature we being apt to like best what we are accustom'd to most both history and our own experience afford us many strange examples of the nature of Custom and among those many one of an English Gentleman who was in my time in the Gallies at Marseillies where by long Custom of being so he not only grew a Contended Slave but if I may so say a Voluntier for he was a good Gentleman of the Family of the Courtnies and as he said had some prospect of an Estate in England yet he chose to continue that kind of Life rather than enjoy his Liberty which they say was offered to be procured for him which mad refusal of his has totally defeated half the French Proverb That there can be no such thing in Nature as an ugly Mistris or a handsom Prison 'T is an old Curse among the Turks I wish you as little rest as a Christians Hat and I wish it may not grow a new Curse among the Christians I wish you as little rest as an English Fashion for they are now so much Frenchefied as they change oftner than the Moon and rest as little as the Sea which is in a continual motion And I think I may properly enough say of Fashions what a Writer said of Serving-Men such as are extraordinary Tall are entertained for Porters to Lords and such as are very Low are taken to be Dwarfs to Ladies whilst Men of a good middle-size Stature often want Masters So all extremities of Fashions are worn by many of the Lords and Ladies but a sober moderate Dress few will entertain So much have these extremities of French Fashions infatuated our minds and debauch'd our fancies that those that do not exactly follow their Measures tho they are above all needful use and very much beside all decent sobriety are esteem'd as great Phanaticks and Dissenters to the gentile Rules of modish Dressing as any Nonconformist can be to the Government of Church Discipline Thus we have fool'd our selves into such ridiculous extreams as to make the French superfluities to become not only the Standard of our Fashions but the very necessity of our Apparel Paris being for Fashions like the Camelion for its Colours who gives them to all beholders whereas in all others we receive them from the Ideas of things we meet with And indeed the French Fashions change so often and cost so dear that many of our young Fops that are newly got into their Estates but not at all into their years of discretion do follow their vain fashions and so to be esteemed modishly well bred in a little time are forced to sell their real Estates for ever and if 't were not for fear of grating your Ears with the unsavory sound of a Clinch I was just going to say that they are the very worst sort of Fools that will sell English Lordships to buy French Manners As our Conditions are not alike so our Dresses ought not to be the same for our Clothes must match our Revenue as well as fit our Body for great Expences become a poor Man as a large Switzers Breeches does a Dwarf The Cost of keeping a great Table a rich Equipage and a large Retinue being only for a Person of great Quality and good Estate and he that sells his Lands only to live at such a ranting extravagant rate in a few Months shews his great folly as well as merits the misery of sad want Apparel like a River is only good and useful whilst kept within the Banks and Limits of Moderation but when it begins to swell and break out into excess it is so far from being useful as it still proves pernicious if not destructive We read that the Romans were so very cautious and wise as to banish out of their Republick such as should attempt to give any new advice in it and I fancy the reason for it was that they believed there were more bad than good Men in their Republic and therefore such more forward to receive ill Advice than hearken to good Counsel And since I put no Name here I will venture to say 'T were well the same Rule were used as to Dresses and that any one that brought into England a new fashion'd Dress according to the Paris Mode might be banished it because 't is most certain there are more of our young Men and Women extravagantly given than vertuously inclin'd and consequently more apt to imitate a new Mode especially if a French Dress than any sober decent Apparel of their own Country Growth for indeed it may be truly said of our English following French fashions what a Writer said of Aristotle that whatsoever indigested notions he vomited up there were many young Philosophers ready to lick them up I am sure what extravagant fashions the French wear too many people are apt to approve and follow Really I cannot now but laugh as well as wonder when I think how our young English Nobility and Gentry are tied and confined to the strict Rules of the French fashions for our English Judgments in that grand affair of Dresses are only admitted to imitate and approve and many imitate what they do not approve for their Fancies are not allow'd to invent or choose scarce add or diminish but we must forsooth with an implicit Faith reverence what the French wear and to be as infallible a rule to our English Modes as a Church Decree is a Guide to those