bird that defileth his owne nest and if a Wife vse her Husband so how maye the Husband vse the Wife Because this is the qualitie of that sex to ouerthwart and vpbraide and sue the preheminence of their Husbands therefore the Philosophers coulde not tell how to define a Wife but called her The contrarie to a Husband as though nothing were so crosse and contrarie to a man as a Wife This is not Scripture but no slaunder to many As Dauid exalteth the loue of women aboue all other loues so Salomon mounteth the enuie of women aboue all other enuies stubborne sullen taunting gainsaying outfacing with such a bitter humour that one would thinke they were molten out of the salt pillar into which Loths Wife was transformed We say not all are alike but this sect hath manie Disciples Dooth the ribbe that is in a mans side fret him or gall him no more should she which is made of the ribbe Though a woman bee wise and painfull and haue many good parts yet if she bee a shrewe her troublesome iarring in the end will make her honest behauiour vnpleasant as her ouer pinching at last causeth her good huswiferie to be euill spoken off Therefore although she be a Wife yet sometime she must obserue the seruants lesson Not answering againe hold her peace to keep the peace Therfore they which keepe silence are well sayd to holde their peace because silence oftentimes doth keep the peace when wordes would breake it To her silence and patience she must adde The acceptable obedience which makes a Woman rule while she is ruled This is the Wiues tribute to her Husband for she is not called his head but hee is called her head Great cause hath man to make much of his wife for great and many are her dueties to him And therefore Paule saith Wiues submit your selues vnto your Husbands as to the Lord. Shewing that she should regarde his will as the Lordes will but withall as the Lord commandeth only that which is good right so she should obey her Husband in good and right orels she dooth not obey him as the Lord but as the tempter The first subiection of Woman began at sinne for when GOD cursed her for seducing her Husband when the Serpent had seduced her he sayd He shall haue authoritie ouer thee And therefore as the man named all other creatures in signe that they should bee subiect to him as a seruant which commeth when his Master calleth him by his name so he did name the woman also in token that she should be subiect to him likewise And therefore Asuerus made a lawe that euery man shoulde beare rule in his owne house and not the Woman Because she sinned first therefore she is humbled most and euer since the daughters of Sara are bound to call their husbands Lords as Sara called her husband that is to take them for their Lords for heads gouernours If ye disdaine to followe Abrahams Spouse the Apostle biddeth you followe Christs Spouse for he saith Let a wife bee subiect to her husband as the Church is to Christ. A greater loue than this saith Christ no man can haue So a better example than this no Woman can haue That the Wife may yeeld this reuerence to her Husband Paule would haue her attire to bee modest and orderly for garish apparell hath taught manie gossips to disdaine their husbands This is the folly of some men to lay all their pride vpon their wiues they care not how they slouen themselues so their wiues iet like Peacocks But Peter doth commend Sara for her attire and not Abraham shewing that women should braue it no more than men and God made Eues coate of the same cloath that he made Adams They couered themselues with leaues and God derided them but now they couer themselues with pride like Sathan which is fallen down before them like lightning ruffe vpon ruffe lace vpon lace cut vpō cut foure and twentie orders vntil the woman be not precious as her apparell that if any man would picture vanitie he must take a patterne of women or els he cannot drawe her likenes As Herodias was worse for her fine dauncing so a woman may haue too many ornaments frisled lockes naked breasts painting perfume and especially a rowling eye are the forerunners of adulterie and hee which hath such a wife hath a fine plague Once women were married without dowries because they were well nurtured but now if they waighed not more in gold than in goodnes many should sit like nuns without husbāds Thus we haue shadowed the mans dueties to his wife and the womans to her husband After their dueties one to another they must learne their dueties to their familie One compareth the master of the house to the Seraphin which came and kindled the Prophets zeale so he should goe from wife to seruants and from seruants to children and kindle them in the zeale of GOD longing to teach his knowledge as a Nurse to emptie her breasts Another saith that a master in his family hath al the offices of christ for hee must rule and teach and pray rule like a King teach like a Prophet pray like a Priest To shewe how a godly man should behaue himselfe in his household when the holy Ghost speaketh of the conuersion of any housekeeper lightly he saith that the man beleeued with al his houshold As Peter being conuerted must conuert his brethren so the master being conuerted must conuert his seruants For therefore God sayd that he would not hide his counsell from Abraham because hee would teach his familie and surelie all duetie which is not done of conscience is but eye seruice and faileth at most neede as Ziba betraied his master when he should haue defended him Therefore before One simus was conuerted Paul said he was an vnprofitable seruant but when hee was conuerted hee calleth him more than a seruant because such a seruant is better than many seruants Therefore though Laban was wicked himselfe yet he reioyced that Iacob his seruant was godly because GOD blessed him better for him Ioshua saith I and my houshold will serue the Lord. Shewing that masters should receiue none into their houses but whom they can gouerne as Ioshu◠did Therefore it is noted of Cornelius that all his houshold serued God like himselfe This is reported also of Ioseph and Marie for an example that they went vp euerie yere with all their familie to worship at Ierusalem that their childrē and their seruants might learne to know God as well as they These examples bee written for householders as other are for Magistrates and Ministers and Souldiers that no calling might seeke further than the Scripture for instruction Wherefore as you are masters now and they your seruants so instruct them and traine them as
not to be bound more thaÌ„ other A peculiar gift may not be made a general rule because none can vse it but they which haue it And therfore in 1. Cor. 7. 17. he saith As God hath distributed to euery man so let him walk That is if he haue not the gift of continencie he is bound to marrie and therefore Paule commaundeth in the seuenth verse whether he be Minister or other If they cannot abstaine let them marrie as though they tempted God if they married not The Law was generall It is not good for man to be alone exempting one order of men no more than an other And again Christ speaking of Chastity saith All men cannot receiue this thing Therefore vnlesse we knowe that this order of men can receiue this thing Christ forbids to binde them more than other and therefore as the Priests were maried that taught the Lawe so Christ chose Apostles which were maried to preach the Gospell Therefore the doctrine of Papists is the doctrine of Deuils for Paule calleth the forbidding of mariage the doctrine of Deuils a fit title for all their bookes Lastly if Mariage be a remedie against sinne then Mariage it selfe is no sinne for if Mariage it selfe were a sinne we might not marrie for any cause because we must not do the least euill that the greatest good may come of it and if Mariage be not a sinne then the dueties of Mariage are no sinne that is the secreate of Mariage is not euill and therefore Paule saith not only Mariage is honourable but the bed is honorable that is euen the action of Mariage is as lawfull as Mariage Besides Paul saith Let the Husband giue vnto the Wife due beneuolence heere is a commandement to yeeld this duety that which is commanded is lawfull and not to doe it is a breach of the commandement Therefore Mariage was instituted before any sinne was to shew that there is no sinne in it if it be not abused but because this is rare therefore after women were deliuered God appointed them to be purified shewing that some staine or other doth creep into this action which had neede to be repented and therefore when they prayed Paule would not haue them come together least their prayers should be hindered The third cause is to auoid the inconuenience of solitarinesse signified in these words It is not good for man to be alone as though he had said this life would be miserable and irkesome and vnpleasant to man if the Lord had not giuen him a wife to company his troubles If it be not good for man to be alone then it is good for man to haue a fellow therefore as God created a paire of all other kindes so he created a paire of this kinde We say that one is none because he cannot be fewer than one he can not be lesser than one he can not be weaker than one and therfore the Wise man saith Woe to him which is alone that is he which is alone shall haue woe Thoughts and cares and feares will come to him because hee hath none to coÌ„fort him as theeues steale in when the house is emptie like a Turtle which hath lost his mate like one legge when the other is cut off like one wing when the other is clipt so had the man bin if the woman had not bin ioyned to him therefore for mutuall societie God coupled two together that the infinite troubles which lye vppon vs in this world might be eased with the comfort and helpe one of an other and that the poore in the world might haue some comfort as well as the rich for the poore man saith Salomon is forsaken of his owne brethren yet God hath prouided one comforter for him like Ionathans armour-bearer that shall neuer forsake him that is another selfe which is the only commoditie as I may tearme it wherein the poore doe match the rich without which some persons should haue no helper no comforter no friend at all But as it is not good to be alone so Salomon sheweth That it is better to be alone than to dwell with a froward Wise which is like a quotidian ague to keepe his patience in vre Such furies do haunt some men like Saules spirit as though the Deuill had put a sword into their handes to kill themselues therefore choose whome thou mayest enioy or liue alone still and thou shalt not repent thy bargaine That thou mayest take and kepe without repentance now we will speake of the choice which some call the way to good wiues dwelling for these flowers grow not on euery ground therefore they say that in wiuing and striuing a man should take counsell of all the world As Moses considered what spies he sent into Chanaan so thou must regarde whome thou sendest to spie out a Wife for thee Discretion is a warie spie but fancie is a rash spie and liketh whome she will mislike againe In Zacharie Sinne is called a woman which sheweth that women haue many faults therefore he which chooseth of them had neede haue iudgement and make an Anatomie of their bodies and minds by squire and rule before he say This shall be mine For the wisest man sayth I haue found one man of a thousand but a woman among them all haue I not sound as though there were a dearth of good women ouer the worlde For helpe hereof in 1. Cor. 7. 39. wee are taught to marrie in the Lord then we must choose in the Lord too therefore we must begin our Mariage where Salomon began his wisedome Giue vnto thy seruant an vnderstanding heart so giue vnto thy seruant an vnderstaÌ„ding wife If Abrahams seruant praied the Lord to prosper his businesse when hee went about to choose a wife for another how shouldst thou pray when thou goest about a wife for thy selfe that thou maiest say after My lot is fallen in a pleasant ground To direct thee to a right choice herein the holie Ghost giues thee two rules Godlines and Fitnes Godlines because our Spouse must bee like Christs spouse that is graced with gifts imbrodered with vertues as if wee did marrie Holinesse her selfe For the mariage of man and woman is resembled of the Apostle to the Mariage of Christ and the Church Now the Church is called Holie because she is holie In the 6. Cantie she is called Vndefiled because she is vndefiled In the 45. Psalme she is called faire within because her beautie is inwarde so our Spouse should bee holie vndefiled and faire within As GOD respecteth the heart so we must respect the heart because that must loue and not the face Couetousnes hath euer been a suter to the richest and pride to the highest and lightnesse to the faâ—rest and for reuenge hereof his ioye hath euer ended with his wiues youth which tooke her beautie
if you would shewe what masters they should be hereafter After the care of their soules they must care for their bodies for if the labourer is worthie of his hire which laboureth but a day what is the seruant worth which laboureth euerie day Therefore Paule is so earnest with Philemon to make much of Onesimus his seruant that he desireth Philemon to receiue him as he would himself Therefore because cruell greedie Masters should not vse them too hardly God remembred them in his creation and made euerie weeke one day of rest wherein they should be as free as their Masters so God pitieth the poore labourer from heauen and euerie Saboath lookes downe vpon him from heauen as if he should say one day thy labours shall haue an ende and thou shalt rest for euer as thou restest this day By this wee see as Dauid did limit Ioab that hee should not kill Absalom so God hath bound masters that they should not oppresse their seruants Shall God respect thine more than thou Art thou made fresher to thy labour by a little rest and is not thy seruant made stronger by rest to labour for thee How many beasts and sheepe did Laban lose onely for hardly intreating of a good seruant Therfore that is the way to lose but not to thriue He which counteth his seruant his slaue is in an error for there is difference betweene beleeuing seruants and Infidel seruants the Infidels were made slaues to the Iewes because GOD hated them and would humble them but their brethren did serue thē like helpers which should be trained by them It is not a base nor a vile thing to be called a seruant for our Lord is called a seruant which teacheth Christians to vse their seruants well for Christs sake seeing they are seruants too and haue one master Christ. As Dauid speaketh of man saying Thou hast made him a little lower than the Angells so I may say of seruants that God hath made them a little lower thā children not children but the next to children as one would say inferiour children or sonnes in lawe and therefore the householder is called Paterfamilias which signifieth a father of his familie because he shoulde haue a fatherly care ouer his seruants as if they were his children and not vse thē onely for their labour like beasts Beside the name of a seruant doth not signifie suffering but dooing therefore masters must not exercise their hands vppon them but set their hands to worke and yet as God laieth no more vppon his seruants than he makes them able to beare so men should lay no more vppon their seruants than they are able to beare For a good man saith Salomon is mercifull to his beast and therefore he will be more mercifull to his brother That man is not worthie to bee serued which cannot affoord that his seruants should serue God as well as himselfe Giue vnto God that which is Gods and then thou maiest take that which is thine He which careth not for his familie saith Paule is worse than an Infidel because Infidels care for their familie But as Agur praieth Giue me not too much nor too little but feede me with foode conuenient So their care should not be too much nor too little but conuenient or els they are worse than Infidells too because Couetousnes is called Idolatrie which is worse than Infidelitie for it is lesse rebellion not to honour the King than to set vp another King against him as the Idolaters doo against the King of heauen Next vnto seruants instruction and labours must bee considered their corrections As Paule saith Fathers prouoke not your children to wrath So I may say Masters prouoke not your seruants to wrath that is vse such reproofes such corrections that you do not prouoke them but mooue them that you doo not exasperate them but win them for reuiling words and vnreasonable fiercenes doth more hurt than good And therefore the law of God did charge the Master that hee should not inflict aboue fourtie stripes vppon his seruant least hee should seeme despised in his eyes For while a childe or scholler or seruant dooth thinke that hee is reprooued for loue or beaten with reason it makes him think of his fault and be ashamed but when he seeth that he is rebuked with curses and beaten with staues as though hee were hated like a dogge his heart is hardened against the man which correcteth him and the fault for which he is corrected after he becommeth desperate like a horse which turneth vppon the striker and therefore thinke that GOD euen then chides you whēsoeuer you chide in such rage For though there be a fault yet some things must bee winkt at some things forgiuen and some things punished with a looke for he which takes the forfeit of euery offence shall neuer rest but vexe himselfe more than his seruant Further I haue heard Experience say that in these punishments it is most meete and acceptable to the offender that the man should correct his men and the woman her maides for a mans nature skorneth to bee beaten of a woman and a maides nature is corrupted with the stripes of a man Therefore wee reade that Abraham would not meddle with his maide but committed her to his wife and saide Doo with her as it pleaseth thee As if he should say it belongeth not to me but to thee Lastly we put the duetie toward children because they come last to their hands In Latin children are called Pignora that is pledges as if I should say a pledge of the husbands loue to the wife and a pledge of the wiues loue toward the husband for there is nothing which doth so knit loue between the man and the wife as the fruite of the wombe Therefore when Leah began to conceaue she sayd now my husband will loue me as though the husband did loue for children If a woman haue many defects as Leah had yet this is the mends which she makes her husband to bring him childrē which is the right Wedding Ring that sealeth and maketh vp as it were the Marriage When their father and mother fall out they pert vp betweene them like little mediators and with many pretie sportes make truce when other dare not speake to thē Therefore now let vs consider what these little ones may challenge of their parents which stād thē in sted of Lawiers The first duetie is the mothers that is to nurse her childe at her owne breasts as Sara did Isaak therefore Esaiah ioyneth the nurces name and the mothers name both in one and calleth them nurcing mothers shewing that mothers should bee the nurces So whē God chose a nurce for Moses he led the handmaid of Pharaohs daughter to his mother as though GOD would haue none to nurse him but his mother After when the Sonne of God was borne his
bodie to the earth then thy bodie is set in order when thou bequeathest thy soule to God then thy soule is set in order when thou bequeathest thy goods to the owners then thy goods are set in order therefore if thou die with other meÌ„s goods in thy hand then thou diest before thou haue set things in order and then thou diest in thy sinnes and then no promise in all the Scripture appertaineth vnto thee because nothing is promised vnto sinners but vnto penitent sinners Therefore that you may not die in your sinnes it is necessary to make restitution before you die or els you die in your sinne and are crossed out of all the ioyes of heauen Therefore as Abner saide to Ioah Knowest thou not that it will be bitternes in the latter end So remember whether this course will bee sweete or bitter in the end Thus you haue heard the definition of Vsurie and the deriuation of it and the vnlawfulnes of it and the kindes of it and the punishment of it and the arguments which are alleaged for it what may bee thought of them which doo not take Vsurie but giue Vsurie and what they should doo which haue got their liuing by Vsurie Now seeing you may not bee Vsurers to men let euerie man hereafter bee an Vsurer to GOD which promiseth If thou leaue father or mother or wife or children or house or land for him not ten in the hundreth but an hundreth for ten nay an hundreth for one and in the world to come life euerlasting that is a thousand for one That we may receiue this Vsurie let vs pray that the wordes which wee haue heard out of this Psalme may dwell with vs till we dwell in heauen FINIS Reuerendis CouerdaluÌ„ excipio Gen. 49. 1. 2. Cor. 2. 16. Eccle. 9. 9. Gen. 2. 18. Exo. 22. 16 Deu. 22. 28 Math. 1. 18. * * That is betweene the Contract and the Marriage Luc. 1. 27. 42. 49. c. What Mariage is The parts of this treatise Heb. 13. 4. Three excellencies of Mariage Act 7. 53. Heb. 2. 2. Gen. 2. 22. Mariage the first ordinance of God 3. Gen. 3. 1â— Luk. 1. 25. Deut. 23. 2. Christs first myracle at a Mariage Iohn 2. 8. Mat. 22. 2. Verse 11. Cant. 5. 9. Three Mariages of Christ. 1. 2. 3. Reuel 19 7. Reuel 21. 9. Reue. 17. 1. By Mariage the womans cursse turned to two blessings Gen. 3. 16. Gen. 1. 28. Iohn 16. 21. 1. Timo. 2. 15. * * For those paines will try her saith Note Gen 2. 22. A note of Adams sleepe Gen. 2. 21. 1. Cor. 15. 22. 45. Ephes. 5 14. Iohn 14. 6. A note of Adams sleepe Gen. 27. 3. A note of Adams ribbe Gen. 2. 22. Ephe. 5. 23. The Fathers obseruation Pro. 14. 14. Thus Adam doth Gen. 2. Gen. 29. 20. Three causes of Mariage Gen. 1. 27. Gen. 1. 28. Why Mariage is called Matrimonie Without Mariage all things should be vaine This is signified in Deut. 23. 1. Prou. 5. 18. Mala. 2. 18. The second cause 1. Cor. 7. 2. Papists Stewes 2. Sam. 16. 22. Mal. 2. 15. 1. Pet. 3. 20. Deut. 17. 17. 1. Tim. 3. 2. Gen. 4. 23. Math. 9. 5. Prou. 2. 16. Gen. 36. 24. Fornicators like the Deuill Mat. 13. 25. Psal. 128. 4. Gen. 1. 28. Bastards Iud. 11. 1. They might be saued but they had the marke of a cursse Leuit. 20. 10. Deut. 22. 22. Maried fornicators The mariage of Ministers 1. Cor. 7. 9. Hebr. 13 4. 1. Corin. 7. 1. Tim. 3. 2. 1. Cor. 7. 6. 1. Cor. 7. 17. Gen. 2. 1â— Math. 19. 11. 1. Tim. 4. 3. 〈◊〉 3. 8. * * Be not thou vaine and these words will not be offensiue Hebr. 13. 4. 1. Cor. 7. 3. Leuit. 12. 4. 5. c. 1. Cor. 7. 5. The third cause Gen. 2. Eccl. 4. 10. Pro. 19. 7. Pro. 27. 10. 1. Sam. 14. 7. A Wife is the poore mans riches Prou. 21. 9. 1. Sam. 16. 14. 3. The choice Deut. 1. 23. 24. Two spies for a Wife Zach. 5. 7. Eccle. 7. 30. 1. King 3. 9 Gen. 24. 12. Godly and fit Ephes. 5. 29. Cant. 6. 8. Psal. 45. 9. 1. Sam. 16. 7. 1. Cor. 13. 13. A sit Wise. The ceremonie is not approued but the inuention declared 1. Sam. 2. 35. The saying of a godly man Gen. 2. 18. 2. Cor. 6. 14. Gen. 2. 22. Phil. 4. 3. Ezek. 16. 44. Fiue rules in the choise of a good wife 1. Psal. 112. 6 Pro. 107. Mar. 14. 9. Luc. 6. 26. Ioh. 15. 19. Ioh. 8. 46. Luk. 1 6. 2. Eccl. 8. 7. Act. 3. 2. Gen. 24. 65. 〈◊〉 To Adam first and to Moses after Maides must speak like an Eccho Math. 12. 34. Math. 12. 36. Prou. 18. 7. Prou. 17. 23. Eccl. 12. 10. Pro. 31. 26. Prou. 19. 15. Num. 19. 15. 4. Luk. 16. 19. Mar. 1. 6. 2. King 1. 8 1. Thess. 5. 22. Rom. 12. 2. 5. 1. King 12. 8. Prou. 1. 11. Psal. 6. 8. Gen. 24. 50. Parents consent in marriage Exod. 20. Gen. 2. 22. Exod. 22. 〈◊〉 Num. 30. 6. Deut 7. 3. 1. Cor. 7. 38. Iob. 1. 3. 10. Gen. 29. 18. 1. Sam. 18. 17. Gen. 28. 6. Gen. 34. 9. Gen. 24. 51. 52. 53. Iud. 14. 2. Mariage with Papists c. Gen. 24. 3. Exo. 34. 16. Gen. 28. 1. Mal. 2. 11. Ezra 9. 12 Gen. 34. 14. The Similitude holds in their saying and not in their meaning for they speake truly but they meant falsely Mat. 19. 6. Mar. 10. 9. 2. Iohn 10. Math. 4. 3. Luk. 11. 4. 1. King 11. 1. c. 1. Cor. 7. 39. Gen. 3. 4. Gen. 6. 2. Math. 22. 11. Wedding garment Note Luk. 14. 20. Iob. 2. 9. 3. 1. Iud. 14. 2. Chro. 21. 6. 2. Sam. 6. 16. Luk. 17. 32. Luk. 14. 20. The dueties of Marriage The man and wife like cock and dam. Mariage compounded of two loues Gen. 3. 6. Iud. 16. 17. 2. Sam. 13. 15. Math. 10. 37. Gen. 30. 16. Mâ—â—h 27. 19. Math. 22. 11. Best pollicie in marriage to begin well They must learne one anothers nature 1 Cor. 9. 20 Ephe. 4. 25. 1. Cor. 11. 19. 1. Sam 20. 20. A sweete example teachinâ— how coplâ—â— shall neuer fall out Gâ—â— 1â— 6. Ephe. 5. 23. The husbands first dutie Vnderstand in his marriage only Ephe. 5. 25. 1. Cor. 11. 7. Ephe. 5. 28. Leuit. 19. 18. 1. Sam. 1. 8. Mar. 10. 7. Gen. 12. 1. The husbands second duty Man and Wise are two partners Mar. 10. 8. Rom. 8. 32. The husbands last duety 1. Pet. 3. 7. Husbands must hold their hands and Wiues their tungs Gen. 22. 12 Psal. 133. 1. Deut. 24. 5. Math. 12. 25. Gen. 19. 33. Deut. 23. 2. Gen. 20. 16. Gen. 13. 8. Pro. 12. 4. Gen. 2. 23. Ephe. 5. 19. Col. 3. 16. Pro. 5. 16. 1. Tim. 3. 31. Of his wife Leu 19. 28. Deut. 14. 1. 1. Ki. 18. 28 It is properly ment in mourning for the dead but
A Preparatiue to Mariage The summe whereof was spoken at a Contract and inlarged after Whereunto is annexed a Treatise of the Lords Supper and another of Usurie BY HENRIE SMITH Imprinted at London by Thomas Orwin for Thomas Man dwelling in Paternoster row at the signe of the Talbot 1591. NOBILISSIMO VIRO GVILIELMO CEcilio Equiti aurato Baroni Burghleiensi summo Angliae Thesaurario Cantabrigiensis Academiae Cancellario Henricus Smithus haec tria pignota in grati animi testimonium consecrauit To the Reader BEcause sicknesse hath restrained mee from preaching I am content to doe anye good by writing Happye is that Author which is in stead of other that after his Booke is read men neede reade no moe of that matter I goe on a Theame which many haue trauersed before mee prolixely or cursorily or barrenly If I haue performed by studie any more than the rest let my reader iudge and giue glory to him which teacheth by whome he will What I haue endeuored my selfe doo feele and others knowe We are ignorant of many things for a few that we vnderstand but I haue bin alwaye ashamed that my writings shoulde waigh lighter for want of paines which is the bane of Printing and surfetteth the Reader Now I send thee like a Bee to gather Honie out of slowers and weedes Euery Garden is furnished with others and so is ours Reade pray and med 〈…〉 thy profit shall be little in any booke vnlesse thou reade alone and vnlesse thou reade all It is one of the births of my fainting therefore take it with a right hand and if thou finde any thing that doth make thee better I repent not that others importunitie hath obtained it for thee Farewell As Iacob blessed his sonnes when he left them so now I must leaue my fruite to others I pray God to blesse it that it may bring foorth fruit in other and be the sauour of life to all that reade it Thine in Christ H. S. The principall contents of this Treatise THE cause of contracts before Mariage Fol. 2. Three honours geuen of God to Mariage Fol. 3. Three causes of Mariage Fol. 13. Whether Ministers may marry Fol. 19. Whether an old man may marry a young woman contra Fol. 14. Whether Protestants may marry Papists Fol. 47. Whether Children may marry without Parentes consent Fol. 45. Whether Husbands may strike their Wiues Fol. 69. Whether the vse of Mariage be sinne Fol. 23. Whether Mothers should nurse their Children Fol. 99. Fiue markes in the choise of a Husband or Wife Fol. 35. The Husbands dueties Fol. 62. The Wiues dueties Fol. 74. Their duties to their Seruants Fol. 68. Their duties to their Children Fol. 77. Of Stepmothers Fol. 105. Of Diuorcement Fol. 107. Other obseruations that fall in handling the partes MAriage the first ordinance of God and calling of men Fol. 4. Christs first myracle at a Mariage Fol. 5. Three Mariages of Christ. Fol. 6. By Mariage the Womans curse turned to two blessings Fol. 6. A note of Adams sleepe Fol. 10. Another application of his rib whereof was made the woman Fol. 11. The day of Mariage counted the ioyfullest day in mans life Fol. 11. A good Wife like little Zoar which Lot sled to from Sodom Fol. 12. Without Mariage all things should be vaine Fol. 14. Fornicators like the Deuill Fol. 18. No Bastarde prospered but Iiphtah Fol. 19. A maried sornicator like a Gentleman theese Fol. 19. A Wife is the poore mans treasure wherein only he matcheth the rich Fol. 26. Two spies for a Wise Discretion and Fancie Fol. 27. The Wife must not onely be godly but sit Fol. 28. A memorable saying of one that light vpon a sit Wife Fol. 32. The first beginning of the Ring in Marige Fol. 31. Why Mariage doth come of Nuptiae Fol. 37. Maides must speake like an Eccho Fol. 38. A lesson for the married drawne from the name of Wedding garment Fol. 52. The Man and Wife like cock and dam. Fol. 54. Marriage compounded of two loues Fol. 55. The best pollicie in Marriage is to begin well Fol. 58. They must learne one anothers nature Fol. 59. A sweete example teaching how coples shall neuer fall out Fol. 61. Man and Wife like two partners Fol. 66. Abraham bid to leaue all but his Wife Fol. 66. Why Wiues are called Huswiues Fol. 79. When the man is away the Wife must liue like a Widdow Fol 81. Why a Wife was called the Contrary to a Husband Fol. 82. The cause why many despise their Husbands Fol. 86. Many obseruations vppon Seruanntes Fol. 88. The Maister must correct his men and the Mistresse her maides Fol. 97. Children like mediators betweene a man and his Wife Fol. 98. Adulterie like the disease of Marriage and diuorcement like the remedie Fol. 107. Why Adulterie should dissolue Marriage more than anye thing else Fol. 110. A sentence for the Married to thinke vppon Fol. 111. A Preparatiue to Marriage YOu are come hether to bee contracted in the Lord that is of two to bee made one for as GOD hath knit the bones and sinewes together for the strengthening of the bodie so he hath knit man and woman together for the strengthening of this life because two are stronger than one and therefore when GOD made the Woman for Man he sayd I will make him a helpe shewing that man is stronger by his Wife Euerie Marriage before it bee knit should bee contracted as it is shewed in Exo. 22. 16. and Deut. 22. 28. which stay betweene the Contract the Marriage was the time of longing for their affections to settle in because the deferring of that which wee loue doth kindle the desire which if it came easilie and speedilie to vs would make vs set lesse by it Therefore wee reade how Ioseph and Marie were contracted before they were married In the Contract Christ was conceaued and in the Mariage Christ was borne that he might honour both estates Virginitie with his Conception and Marriage with his Birth You are contracted but to bee married therefore I passe from Contracts to speake of Mariage which is nothing els but a communion of life between man and woman ioyned together according to the ordinance of God First I will shewe the excellencie of Marriage then the institution of it then the causes of it then the choise of it then the dueties of it and lastly the diuorcement of it Well might Paule say Mariage is honourable for God hath honoured it himselfe It is honourable for the author honourable for the time and honorable for the place Whereas all other ordinaunces were appoynted of GOD by the hands of men or the hands of Angells Marriage was ordained by God himselfe which cannot erre No man nor Angell brought the Wife to the Husband but GOD himselfe so Marriage hath more honour of God in this than all other ordinances of God beside because he
you not take his instruction Marriage hath neede of many counsellers and doest thou count thy Father too many which is like the foreman of thy instructers If you mark what kind of youths they be which haue such haste that they dare not stay for their parents aduice they are such as hunt for nothing but beautie and for punishment hereof they marrie to beggerie and lose their Father and Mother for their Wife therefore honour thy parents in this as thou wouldest that thy children should honour thee The second question is answered of Paule when he saith Be not vnequally yoked with Infidells As we should not be yoked with Infidells so we should not be yoked with Papists and so we should not be yoked with Atheists for that also is to be vnequally yoked vnlesse we be Atheists too As the Iewes might not marrie with the Chananites so we may not marrie with them which are like Chananites but as the sonnes of Iacob said vnto Emor which would marrie their Sister Wee may not giue our Sister to a man vncircumcised but if you will be Circumcised like vs then we will marrie with you So Parents should say to suiters I may not giue my Daughter to a man vnsanctified but if you will be sanctified then I will giue my Daughter vnto you Though Heresie and irreligion be not a cause of diuorse as Paule teacheth yet it is a cause of restraint for we may not marrie all with whome we may liue being married If adulterie may separate marriage shal not idolatry hinder marriage which is worse than it Christ saith Let no man separate whome God hath ioyned so I may say Let no man ioyne whome God doeth separate For if our Father must be pleased with our Marriage much more should we please that Father which ordained Marriage Shall I say Be my Wife to whome I may not saye Be my Companion Or Come to my bed to whome I may not say Come to my table How should my marriage speede well when I marrie one to whome I may not say God speede because she is none of Gods friendes Doth not hee marrie with the Deuill which marrieth with the tempter For Tempter is his name and to tempt is his nature When a man may chuse he should chuse the best but this man chuseth the worst He prayeth Not to be led into temptation and leadeth himselfe into temptation Surely he doth not feare sinne which doth not shunne occasions and he is worthy to be snared which maketh a trappe for himselfe When Salomon the myrrour of wisedome the wonder of the world the figure of our Lord by idolatrous Concubines is turned to an idolater let no man say I shall not be seduced but say How shall I stande where such a Cedar fell The Wife must be meete as God saide Gen. 2. 18. But how is shee meete if thou be a Christian and she a Papist We must marrie in the Lord as Paule saith but how do we marrie in the Lord when wee marrie the Lords enemies our Spouse must bee like Christs Spouse but Christs Spouse is neither Harlot nor Heretick nor Atheist If she bee poore the Lord reprooueth not for that if she bee weake the Lord reprooueth not for that if she bee hard fauoured the Lord reprooueth not for that but none giueth any dispensation for godlines but the diuell Therefore they which take that priuiledge are like thē which seeke to Witches are guiltie of preferring euill before good This vnequal Mariage was the chiefe cause that brought the flood the first beginning of Giants mōstrous births shewing by their mōstrous children what a monstrous thing it is for beleeuers and vnbeleeuers to match together In Matth. 22. Christ sheweth that before parties married they were wont to put on faire newe garments which were called Wedding garments a warning vnto all which put on Wedding garments to put on trueth and holinesse too which so precisely is resembled by that garment more than other It is noted in the 14. of Luke that of all them which were inuited to the Lords banquet and came not onely hee which had married a Wife did not desire to bee excused but saide stoutly I cannot come Shewing how this state doth occupie a man most and drawe him often from the seruice of God and therefore wee had not neede to take the worse for the best are combersome enough In the 2. of Iob it is obserued of the patient man that hee did not curse the day of his birth vntill his wife brake foorth into blasphemie shewing that wicked womē are able to change the stedfastest man more than all temptatiōs beside Sampson would take a Philistian to wife but he lost his honour his strength and his life by her least any should doo the like But what a notable warning is that in 2. Chro. 21. 6. where the holy Ghost saith Iehoram walked in the waies of Ahab for he had the daughter of Ahab to wife as though it were a miracle if he had been better than he was because his wife was a temptation Miserable is that man which is fettered with a woman that liketh not his religion for she will be nibling at his prayer and at his studie and at his meditations till she haue tyred his deuotions and turned the edge of his soule as Michol tried Dauid she mocked him for his zeale and liked her self in her folly Therfore as Christ saieth Remember Loths wife so when thou marriest remember Ichorams wife and be not wedded to her which hath not the Wedding garment but let vnitie goe first and let vnion come after and hope not to conuert her but feare that she wil peruert thee least thou saye after like him which should come to the Lords banquet I haue married a wife and cannot come Yet the chiefest point is behind that is your dueties The dueties of Mariage may be reduced to the dueties of Man and Wife one toward another and their dueties towarde their children and their dueties toward their seruants For themselues saieth one they must think that they are like two birds the one is the Cock and the other is the Dam the Cocke flieth abroad to bring in the Dam sitteth vpon the nest to keepe al at home So God hath made the man to trauaile abroade and the woman to keepe home and so their nature and their wit and their strength are fitted accordingly for the mās pleasure is most abroade and the womans within In euery state there is some one vertue which belongeth to that calling more than other as Iustice to Magistrates and Knowledge to Preachers and Fortitude to Souldiers so loue is the Marriage vertue which sings Musicke to their whole life Wedlocke is made of two loues which I may call the first loue and the after loue As euerie man is taught to loue GOD
their wiues as their bodies And after in the 33. verse as though it were too little to loue them as their bodies he sayth Let euerie one loue his Wife as himselfe that is body and soule too For if God commaunded men to loue their neighbours as themselues much more are they bound to loue their wiues as themselues which are their next neighbours As Elkanah did not loue his wife lesse for her barrennes but sayd Am not I better vnto thee than tenne sonnes as though he fauoured her more for that which she thought her selfe despised So a good husband will not take occasion to loue his wife lesse for her infirmities but comfort her more for them as this man did that she may beare with his infirmities too When Christ sayth that a man should leaue Father and Mother to cleaue to his Wife hee signifieth how Christ left his Father for his Spouse and that man doth not loue his wife so much as he should vntill he affect her more than euer he did his father or mother Therfore when GOD bad Abraham forsake all his kindred yet he bad him not forsake his Wife As though the other somtime might be forsaken for God but the wife must bee kept for GOD like a charge which bindeth for tearme of life His next duetie to loue is a fruit of his loue that is to let all things be cōmon betweene them which were priuate before The man wife are partners like two owers in a boate therefore hee must diuide offices and affaires goods with her causing her to bee feared and reuerenced and obeied of her children seruants like himselfe for she is as an vnder officer in his Common weale and therefore she must be assisted borne out like his deputie as the Prince standeth with his Magistrates for his owne quiet because they are the legges which beare him vp To shew this communitie betweene husband and wife he is to maintaine her as he dooth himselfe because Christ saith They are no more two but one Therefore when hee maintaineth her hee must thinke it but one charge because he maintaineth no moe but himself for they two are one He may not say as Husbands are wōt to say that which is thine is mine and that which is mine is my owne but that which is mine is thine and my selfe too For as it is sayd He which hath giuen vs his Sonne can he denie vs any thing So she may say he which hath giuen me himselfe can he denie me any thing The bodie is better than the goodes therefore if the bodie be mine the goods are mine too Lastly hee must tender her as much as all her friends because he hath taken her from her friends and couenanted to tender her for them all To shew how he should tender her Peter saith Honour the woman as the weaker vessell As we doo not handle glasses like pots because they are weaker vessels but touch thē nicely and softly for feare of cracks so a man must intreate his wife with gentlenes and softnes not expecting that wisedome nor that faith nor that patience nor that strength in the weaker vessell which should be in the stronger but thinke when he takes a wife he takes a Vineyard not grapes but a vineyard to beare him grapes therfore he must sow it and dresse it and water it and fence it and thinke it a good vineyard if at last it bring forth grapes So hee must not looke to finde a wife without a fault but thinke that she is committed to him to reclaime her from her faults for all are defectiues and if he finde the Prouerbe true that in space commeth grace hee must reioyce as much at his wife when she mendeth as the Husbandman reioyceth when his Vineyard beginneth to fructifie This is farre from ciuill warres betweene man and wife in all his offices is found no office to fight The very name of a wife is like the Angell which stayed Abrahams hand whē the stroke was cōming If Dauid because he could not expresse the good and comfort of Vnitie was faine to say Oh how good and ioyfull a thing it is for brethren to dwell together in vnitie Then weigh and iudge how harsh and bitter a thing it is for man and wife to liue together in emnitie For the first yeare after Marriage God would not haue the husband goe to warre with his enemies but no yeare would he haue him warre with his wife and therfore God gaue him that yeare to stay at home and settle his loue that hee might not warre nor iarre after for the God of peace dwelleth not in the house of warre As a kingdome cannot stand if it bee diuided so a house cannot stand if it bee diuided for strife is like fire which leaues nothing but dust smoake and ashes behind it We reade in the Scripture of Masters that stroke their seruants but neuer of any that stroke his Wife but rebuked her Lot was drunke when hee lay with his daughters in stead of a wife and is he sober which striketh his wife in stead of his seruants The lawe sheweth how a bond man should bee corrected but the wife is like a Iudge which is ioyned in Commission with her Husband to correct other Wilt thou strike one in his owne house no more shouldest thou strike thy wife in her house She is come to thee as to a Sanctuarie to defend her from hurt and canst thou hurt her thy selfe Therfore Abraham was called Saras Vayle because he should shield her for a Vaile is made to saue Abraham said to Lot Are we not brethren that is may brethren iarre but they may say are we not one can one chide without another can one fight without another He is a bad Ost which welcommeth his guest with stripes Doth a King trample his Crowne Salomon calleth the wife the Crowne of the husband therefore he which woundeth her woundeth his honour She is a free Citizen in thy house and hath taken the peace of thee the first day of her Marriage to hold thy hands till she release thee againe Adam saith of his Spouse This is flesh of my flesh But no man sayth Paule Euer hated his owne flesh So then if a man aske whether he may strike his wife God sayth nay thou mayest not hate thy wife for no man hateth his owne flesh shewing that he should not come neere blowes but thinke his wrath too much for Paule saith Be not bitter to your Wiues noting that anger in a husband is a vice Euery man is ashamed to lay hands on a woman because she cannot match him therfore he is a shamelesse man which laieth hands on his wife If a man be seene raging with himselfe he is carried to Bedlam so these mad men which beate thēselues should be sent to Bedlam til their madnes be gone Salomon
saith Delight continually in her loue that is begin proceede and ende in loue This counsel is broken so often as they discord In reuenge whereof he sheweth that their delight is gone because he calleth Loue their delight Therefore as Paule saith of Bishops A Bishop must be no striker so a Husband must bee no striker for hee which striketh his owne flesh breaketh that lawe which saith Thou shalt not make a skarre in thy flesh and is like the Baalites which wounded their owne bodies Thus wee haue sent a letter vnto Husbands to reade before they fight Now let vs goe home to Loue againe Wouldest thou learne how to make thy match delightfull Salomon said Reioyce in her loue continually As though thou couldst not delight without loue and with loue thou mightest delight continually Therefore Loue is called the thankfull vertue because it rendereth peace and ease and comfort to him that makes of her So much to Husbands Likewise the Woman maye learn her duetie out of her names They are called goodwiues as goodwife A. and goodwife B. Euery Wife is called Goodwife therfore if they be not goodwiues their names doo belie them and they are not worth their titles but answer to a wrong name as Players doo vpon a stage This name pleaseth them wel but beside this a Wife is called a Yoke fellowe to shewe that she should helpe her Husband to beare his yoke that is his griefe must bee her griefe and whether it bee the yoke of pouertie or the yoke of enuie or the yoke of sicknesse or the yoke of imprisonment she must submit her neck to beare it patiently with him or els she is not his yoke fellowe but his yoke as though she were inflicted vpon him for a penaltie like Iobs Wife whome the diuell left to torment him when he tooke away all beside The Apostle biddeth to reioyce with them that reioyce and mourne with them that mourne With whom should the Wife reioyce rather than with her Husband or with whome should she mourne willinger than with her owne flesh I will not leaue thee saith Elisha to Eliah so she should neuer leaue him till death Beare one anothers burden saith Paule who shall beare others burden if the Wife doo not beare her Husbands burden Wicked Iezabel comforted her Husband in his sicknesse and Ieroboams Wife sought for his health though she was as bad as he God did not bid Sarah leaue her father and her Countrey as he bad her husband yet because hee bad Abraham leaue his she left hers too shewing that she was cōtent not onely to bee his playfellowe but his yoke fellowe too Beside a yoke fellowe she is called a Helper to helpe him in his businesse to helpe him in his labours to helpe him in his troubles to helpe him in his sicknesse like a woman Phisition sometime with her strength and sometime with her counsell for sometime as God confoundeth the wise by the foolish and the strong by the weake so he teacheth the wife by the foolish and helpeth the strong by the weake Therefore Peter saieth Husbands are wonne by the conuersation of their Wiues As if he should say sometime the weaker vessell is the stronger vessell and Abraham may take counsell of Sara as Naaman was aduised by his seruant The Shunamites coūsel made her Husband receiue a Prophet into his house and Hesters counsell made her Husband spare the Church so some haue been better helpers to their husbands than their husbands haue bin to them for it pleaseth God to prouoke the wise with the foolish as he did the Iewes with the Gentiles Beside a Helper she is called a Comforter too therfore the man is bid to reioyce in his Wife which is as much to saye that Wiues must bee the reioycing of their Husbands euen like Dauids Harpe to comfort Saule Therfore it is sayd of Rebeccah that she prepared meate for her husband such as hee loued so a good Wife is knowne when her wordes and deedes and countenances are such as her Husband loueth she must not examine whether he bee wise or simple but that she is his wife therfore they which are bound must obey as Abigail loued her husband though he was a foole for the Wife is as much despised for taking rule ouer her Husband as he for yeelding it vnto her It becomes not the Mistris to be Master no more than it beseemeth the Master to be Mistris but both to saile with their owne winde Lastly wee call the Wife Huswife that is house wife not a street wife like Thamar nor a field wife like Dinah but a house wife to shew that a good wife keepes her house therefore Paule biddeth Titus to exhort women that they be chast keeping at home presently after Chast he saith keeping at home as though Home were Chastities keeper And therefore Salomon depainting the Whore setteth her at the doore now sitting vpon her stalls now walking in the streetes now looking out of the windowes like curled Iezabel as if she held forth the glasse of temptation for vanitie to gaze vppon But Chastitie careth to please but one and therefore she keepes her Closet as though she were still at prayer The Angell asked Abraham where is thy wife Abraham answered she is in the Tent. The Angell knewe where she was but yet hee asked that we might see how Women in olde time did keepe their tents and houses It is recorded of the Shunamite that she did aske her Husband leaue to goe vnto the Prophet though she went to a Prophet and went of a good errand and for his cause as much as her owne yet she thought it not meete to goe farre abroade without her Husbands leaue Phidias when he should paint a Woman painted her sitting vnder a Snailes shell signifying that she should goe like a Snaile which carrieth his house vpon his back Salomon bad Shimei Goe not beyond the riuer so a Wife should teach her feete go not beyond the doore she must count the walles of her house like the bankes of the Riuer which Shimei might not passe if he would please the King For when Adam was away Eue was made a pray if her Husband bee from her vntill hee returne againe she must thinke her selfe a Widdowe that is seperate from man for Vidua doth signifie a viro diuisa that is Widdowe doth signifie diuided from man therefore now she must haue no fellowship no companie with men because she is diuided from man As it becommeth her to keepe home so it becommeth her to keep silence and alway speake the best of her head Other seeke their honour in triumph but she must seeke her honour in reuerence for it becommeth not any woman to set light by her husband nor to publish his infirmities For they say it is an euill