Mothers as of Fathers and all Duty towards them You must Love your Parents constantly sincerely and eminently Your Father must not be despised when poor nor your Mother when she is old Prov. 23.22 Nor either of them when they rebuke you for sin Pro. 29. Your Love must be pure and not mercenary for gain from them As Absolom's was for all his Flattery 2 Sam. 14. And it must be eminent 'T is unnatural to Love a Father or Mother no more than we Love the most beneficial of our Friends in the World Nature and Justice give Parents the Preheminence 2. Honour your Parents most highly Next unto God most highly In your Thoughts Words and Behaviours Honour them Fear to think an ill thought of them Their faults forget and cover this is praiseworthy Shem and Japheth are Blessed and Cain's posterity Cursed Gen. 9.22 to 28. Let every Speech unto your Parents be expresly Reverent Rachel's to Laban was so Let not my Lord be displeased Gen 31.35 'T is unnatural when it is not so Mal. 1.6 A Son honoureth his Father that is naturally Sons do Break a bone as soon as omit to bow it to your Parents Irreverent gestures of body are wicked most scandalously Solomon bowed to his Mother 1 Kings 2.19 Joseph bowed himself with his Face to the Earth unto his Father Gen. 41.12 Where I see not this threefold Reverence in you to your Parents I cannot think you other than ignorant despisers of God and your Parents 3. Obey your Parents most absolutely I mean in the Lord as the Scripture speaks Where God forbids not do what they bid you and because they bid you though it be against your own minds and wills For this is God's most Wise and Holy Will Col. 3.10 Children obey your Parents in all things for this is well-pleasing unto the Lord. Where is the honour required in the Fifth Commandment without this Read Prov. 13.1 Prov. 1.8 9. Prov. 30.17 Children Rebecca and Rachel kept Sheep at their Parents command Gen. 24. Gen. 29. Jesus Christ himself was subject to Joseph and Mary in their mean employment Luke 2.57 Matt. 13.15 How wonderoufly yielded Isaac to Abraham see Gen. 22.9.10 And the Rechabites to their Father Jer. 35.5 6 7 to v. 11. He that says I will not do what my Parents would have me he therein saith also I will not do what God would have me Unless he can say therefore do I disobey my Parents because I should otherwise sin against God A good Childs heart speaks thus Whatever I can do without sin let my Parents command and spare not 4. Requite your Parents most Zealously 1. Tim. 5.4 Let them learn with Piety at home to requite their Parents for that is good and acceptable toward God The Honour in the Fifth Commandment includes Recompence which is called Honour Numb 22.37 1 Tim. 5.17 Children had you Kingdoms to give your Parents they would not pay your Debt unto them You must all your lives long be paying of it you will never have paid the sum total Never come out of your Parents debt Therefore always according to their needs and your abilities you must be paying your Thank-Offerings A Child is a servant Mal. 3.17 As thee his son that serveth him Phil. 2.22 As a son with the Father hath he served with me You must ever promptly serve them to your power in every innocent matter And if they fall into want you must supply them readily as ever they supplied you and as liberally and more richly too if you are able You must in many cases spare from your selves to give them Yea you must lay out the less upon the Worship of God too to bestow on them To withdraw from Parents even for God's Worship was an abominable fault of the Pharisees condemned by our Saviour Mark 7.9 10 11 12 13. In a word 't is not enough if you do nothing to grieve your Parents You sin if you omit any thing in the power of your hands to comfort them and to make their Loyns bless you Blessed are the Josephs that nourish their Parents and Brethren Gen. 47.12 5. Behave your selves so that you may be high Honours unto your Parents I mean so Holily toward God so Righteously toward Men so Temperately toward your selves So as may make for the Honour of your Parents The Honour of their granted prayers and their blessed pains took for you So as may make both Town and Countrey have your Parents in more Notice and Reputation for you This Counsel comprehends all O what a World should we have if it were followed Children come on and begin and set to mend this World You cannot doubt but this my Counsel is certainly commanded in the Fifth Commandment You must needs know he cannot Honour his Father and Mother that is a reproach and shame to them Whose whole life casts disgrace on their Persons Families and Names Yet so do theirs do that observe not this Counsel See Prov. 17.25 A Foolish son is a grief to his Father and bitterness to her that bare him Come unless you will say plainly ye will be Atheists that your Conversion shall never make joy in Heaven take this day my advice Say just now If prayers and pains will prevail I will make glad my Father and Mother that ever they had me given unto them I will learn diligently every Truth they teach me I will pray hard for every Grace they commend I will perform seriously every Duty they set me I will resist every Lust and Temptation they warn me of I will imitate all the good I see in them God I will know His Gospel-Covenant I will enter and live by My Holy Baptism I will know and keep The Lords Table I will prepare for and hasten to Holiness I will industriously perfect in the fear of God No Man living shall say henceforth that I wrong him wilfully or do him right unwillingly And neither of my Parents shall be able with truth to say that I do so much as seem to forget my debt to them and its depth When this is truly said and with full purpose of heart you then first begin to be good Children and dutiful Then you may be called the Crown and Honour of your Fathers as Prov. 17.6 and their very Glory as it is Hos 9.11 Such as make them not ashamed but honoured in the Gate or in all company as Psal 127.4 5. And until you thus resolve and declare you are the clean contrary For you are Fools And he that begeteth a Fool doth it to his sorrow the Father of a Fool hath no joy 'T is no joy save to a Fool to beget and breed up Slaves for the Devil and Fuel for Hell And this Holy Parents do know if you not sc That A wicked Child of Godly Parents is one of Earths uglyest burthens and without wonderful Grace intervening one of Hells certainest Fire-brands More particularly I now Exhort You. 1. Be it for Conscience
It is required of Superiors according to that power they receive from God and that relation wherein they stand to love pray for and bless their Inferiors to instruct counsel and admonish them countenancing commending and rewarding such as do well discountenancing reproving and chastising such as do ill protecting and providing for them all things necessary for soul and body and by grave wise holy and exemplary carriage to procure Glory to God honour to themselves and so to preserve that Authority which God hath put upon them I will transcribe no more of our many Summaries But propose these particulars which I take to be comprehensive And such that God will judge all the neglecters of and not hold them guiltless however full they be of excuses Knowing the Terror of the Lord I thus instruct and perswade every Christian Parent 1. Be Exemplary in Vniversal Duty Ill Example is the rankest Poyson in the World Parents ill Example is the worst that Children can have I know not what God hath forbid or required if he forbids not ill and requires not good Example Good Example for Duty foresaid Wouldst be a good Parent Thou canst not till thou dost understandly affectionately and practically keep the Gospel-Covenant Owning the Engagement of thy Holy Baptism renewing it at the Lords Supper observing it in all thy ways towards God other Men and thy self You that do not this ye bid your Children not to do it In practice ye bid ' em And ye who bid them not to do this ye bid them virtually be Atheists and Devils and Rebels to God and to your selves As little as ye think of it this ye do God and Godly Men count you so to do Parents Parents con ye well Job 22 21 22 23. Job is advised to Acquaint himself with God to receive and lay up God's Word in his Heart to return unto the Almighty that is to do all I have here foresaid And for his encouragement he is then told his relative Duties will come on with their Blessings He shall be built up that is he shall have more Children And he shall put away Iniquity far from his Tabernacles that is he shall be a good Father and Master and remove the Iniquity of his Children and Servants and promote Family-Godliness Which without that course prescribed he could not expect to do Preceptive Teaching alone is a little more than a Cypher 't is practical Teaching is the Figure The Language that God binds Parents and all Teachers to use is this Come with me unto this and that Duty Fly with me from this and that Sin Mourn with me for this and that Omission and Commission sinful Delight with me in this and that Holy Service And be it written on all our Walls They that are not Patterns to their Children be plagues to their Children They who give them not good Example give them nothing good at least nothing like to do them good For a grain of bad Example doth an hundred times more hurt than a pound of good Counsel ordinarily doth good 2. Be as full of prayer as St. Austin's Mother That Holy Creature got her Son and her Husband Converted by her Prayer But not by slight and sleepy Prayer Think of this Parents As their greatest Wickedness makes not Prayer hopeless so your greatest Sanctity makes not Prayer useless Our Redeemer whose Obedience is Meritorious he himself asks before God gives Nor will God give till in his Name ye ask Ordinarily he will not But if ye ask not amiss ye can never miss of what ye ask And I will be allowed to say Prayer for our Children is that Duty to them without which we can discharge none We must be joyned to God in the Covenant of Grace before we can rightly Pray And we must Pray before we can expect to benefit our selves or our Children by any means possible Gen. 17.18 20. Abraham prayed for Ishmael and that warmly And what says the Text God said and as for Ishmael I have heard thee behold I have blessed him and will make him Fruitful and will multiply him exceedingly twelve Princes shall he beget and I will make him a great Nation David prayed hard for Solomon his Son O Lord God of Abraham Isaac and of Israel our Fathers give to Solomon my Son a perfect heart to keep thy Commandments and thy Statutes 1 Chron. 22 12 1 Chron. 29 18 19. The seventy second Psalm is David's Prayer for his Solomon Parents Of all things be not niggardly of your prayers for your Children Rather deny them Victuals and Drink For many can give them both that cannot put up prayers for them And the same may be said of the will as of the power of most I know few do think it but 't is true a stock of prayers is a richer Child portion than a stock of broad Gold 3. Be Catechizers through the whole compass of the words of Eternal Life Suffer not thy Child to say there is one Truth or one Grace or one Duty necessary to Salvation that thou knewest but never taughtest him Who ever doubted but if a Man had a blind Child he was bound to use all the likely means he could come by to recover it's sight I am very confident that Adam Seth Noah and Sem were all Catechisers From the Cradle the Church was still kept up by Catechising Of Abraham God speaks plainly Gen. 18. 19. For I know him that he will command his Children and his household after him and they shall keep the way of the Lord to do Justice and Judgment that the Lord may bring upon Abraham that which he hath spoken of him David and Bathsheba too Catechised Solomon soundly 1 Kings 2.2 3. I go the way of all the Earth be thou strong therefore and shew thy self a Man And keep the charge of the Lord thy God to walk in his ways to keep his Statutes and his Commandments and his Judgments and his Testimonies as it is written in the Law of Moses that thou mayest prosper in all that thou doest and whithersoever thou turnest thy self 1 Chron. 28.9 And thou Solomon my Son know thou the God of thy Father and serve him with a perfect heart and with a willing mind for the Lord searcheth all hearts and understandeth all the imaginations of the thoughts if thou seek him he will be found of thee but if thou forsake him he will cast thee off for ever Prov. 31.1 The words of King Lemuel the prophesie that his mother taught him Lois and Eunice are praised on this account 2 Tim. 1.5 3 15. When I call to remembrance the unfeigned Faith that is in thee which dwelt first in thy Grand-mother Lois and thy Mother Eunice and I am perswaded that in thee also And that from a Child thou hast known the holy Scriptures which are able to make thee wise unto Salvation through Faith which is in Christ Jesus After the death of the Apostles the Churches had
with naturally free inclination 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 c. and very inward esteem of him Pos 3. Duty unto Man is a fruit of Duty unto God Of Flattery and Pageantry I do not speak but very Duty and such Duty unto Man as is acceptable unto God This all of it grows from Duty unto God as its root Our Duty unto God is double First Submission unto his Authority Secondly Expression Practical of that Submission Now till we submit to his Authority and own him to be what he is unto us we cannot be rightly affected unto our selves or unto any other Creature And till we set our selves to express our submission to his Power by observance of his Precepts we cannot square aright one action toward them or our selves But when we subject our selves to the divine Power and conform our ways to the divine Precepts what followeth Why then our Lunacy is over Owning him our Head we own every fellow Member too And being by him governed every just office to him and to our fellow Creatures is introduced His Authority is sufficient to oblige unto both and his Laws are extant obliging unto them Wherefore rendering unto God the things that are Gods we necessarily render unto Man the things that are Mans. Whereas while we are Rebels unto God we are Divels to our selves and unto one another And must needs be so being that so long as we are in the state of Rebellion we are deserted by the Spirit of all good and are acted by the clean contrary Spirit Blind they are therefore that see not the Nobility of second Table duty in its Heavenly Descent It cometh from first Table-Duty and therefore must needs partake of its Dignity and Excellence It is very observable that according to what is said all second Table-Duties are pressed from the consideration of the first As those of Subjects unto the Higher Powers Rom. 13.1 Let every Soul be subject to the Higher Powers For there is no power but of God the powers that be are ordained of God Of Wives to Husbands Eph. 5 22. Wives submit your selves unto your own Husbands as unto the Lord. Of Children to Parents Eph. 6 1. Children obey your Parents in the Lord for this is right Of People unto their Ministers 1 Thess 5 12. And we beseech you Brethren to know them which Labour among you and are over you in the Lord and admonish you Of Servants to Masters Colos 3 22. Servants obey in all things your Masters according to the flesh not with eye-service as men-pleasers but in singleness of heart fearing God The one Agument unto all is Conscience of the first Commandment Which as the Great Luther well said Is in every Commandment to be understood Pos 4. Duty unto Man is a very great Mean of Duty unto God I have read of a Tree growing in a hot and dry Countrey whose Leaves do drop a Liquor that excellently moistens and maintains the Root Duty to God is indeed the Root of Duty to Man But Duty to Man is that whose influences do greatly contribute to the Life and Liveliness of that Root A Truth so bright that it needs no proof nor meets with any denial Lev. 19.3 Reverence unto Parents seemeth called for as a mean of the Sanctification of Sabbaths And 2 Tim. 1.2 We are plainly bid to do our great Duty to Kings and all in Authority yea and to all Men for this very end that we may lead quiet Lives in all Godliness and Honesty In a word it is the Holy Spirits pleasure ever to verify this memorable saying All Graces and Duties be mutually Mother and Daughter unto each other Love of God and his Service brings forth Love and Serviceableness unto Man And Love and Serviceableness unto Man brings a like Love and Service of God He that would not Love and Serve Men for their own sakes should do both for the sake of the Love and Service of God A Duke would Court the Friendship of a Begger if that would half so much promote his Friendship with the King Pos 5. Duty unto Man is the only convincing proof of sincerity and Duty unto God Duties toward God are for the most part Spiritual and Invisible When you are true therein who but God and Conscience can see your Truth The Duties toward God that are Bodily and Visible are now in the gospel-Gospel-day all very easie and cheap Very Hypocrites do not begrudge them and unfeigned Friends of God can never be known by them 'T is otherwise as to Duties toward Men. They are naked and open to Mens Eyes Their Light as the Sun shineth before all Men. And few will question your Piety if they see your Vniversal and Exquisite Honesty For this reason it seemeth that in the day of Judgment Christ insisteth upon Christians Duties of the Second Table Mat. 25.35 Because they are the most sensible Discoveries of Faith and Holiness and fittest to justifie Saints before the World The Servants of God are obliged to shew abroad who their Master is But they have no way to do it without that which is foresaid Therefore is it that the World so hardly believeth us Christ's Disciples because we so little Love one another They will acknowledge us his Servants when they see more of his Livery which is Love among us Pos 6. Duty to man hath Promises of Reward as well as Duty unto God Wonderful yet most certain this is The Fifth Command is known to be called the first with Promise Eph. 6.2 The Second hath but a general Promise made to the Keepers of the whole Law The Fifth hath a particular Promise made to the Keepers of that single Commandment Let it never be doubted therefore but that it shall be richly Rewarded by God whatever at his Command you perform toward Man Even toward the poorest Child The Gift of a Cup of Water shall be as truly rewarded as Martyrdom it self And be it known unto you Parents and Children that of all Duties between Man and Man the greatest are those between you The Fifth Commandment seemeth the Hinge of both Tables And by its place to speak thus much sc That in order to the Knowledge and Obedience of all the other Commandments it is highly necessary that the Fifth be well Known and Obeyed It is true Natural Parents are not all that be meant therein All true Governors are included But Parents only are mentioned as being the first Governors we have some years before Kings take notice of us And as being the Principal Governors to whom we are most obliged as the Authors of our Beings and those whose Government is not founded in Choice and Contract as others is but in Nature it self Which being considered I proceed Parents Advised to their more Genearl and Particular Duties And pressed with Motives thereto The Duty of Parents to Children is imply'd and concluded in the Fifth Commandment It thus summarily expressed in the Westminster Assemblies Larger Catechism
World and make but a jeast of Religion And this before they know themselves who are the best and wisest and who the most miserable people and foolish Scarcely one of an hundred is ever reduced from the fatal errour so early swallowed and blindly 9 Make their Recreations to deserve their name I mean to be such only as do indeed Recreate and Whet and Sharpen Such as do make for Health of Body and for Chearfulness of Mind and leave them more fit and not less fit for Business then they found them One of our Holy Martyrs repented his having played at Chess Bishop Vsher betimes left the use of Cards as finding them an ensnaring Game All I say is this Games that do not exercise the Body and do much stretch the sinews of the Mind and do exhaust great summs of Time these do bear the Superscription of Satan For in them Play becomes a very work And the Gamester doth as a Mower who should spend all the day in whetting his Sithe 10. Observe carefully each Childs peculiar Temper The difference is very great And the need to know it is great For how shall you else suit your dealings unto it You must never expect to obtain your end by unsuited means If you are very rough with some Children you frighten them not unto their duties but out of their wits Others will scarcely learn any thing unless they be taught like the men of Succoth with briars and thorns And only a middle way with sweetness and severity immixed will reach others Besides as every Man so every Child has some one or other supream sin that supports all the rest and being deposed the rest would soon be mortified Now the Childs temper being found this King-sin of his would not be long to seek And this being well watched and resisted great would be the hopes of the Childs desired Salvation I conclude with a few Motives or moving Considerations Do but remember them and neglect what is foresaid if ye dare C. 1. Your Children are Gods Children by Creation and Redemption and committed to your Tuition O think what you would do for the Kings Child if you had one of his to educate C. 2. Your Children are your selves Very parts of your selves And is it no shame for you that are Men and Christians to neglect or but slightly care for your selves C. 3. You are Baptized and have had your Children Baptized and at their Baptism you engaged to do all this In your Baptism you were bound to do all I have named You saw your Children in their Baptism bound to obey the whole Gospel And you then Promised to do all you could to help them to do it Is all this very nothing C. 4. You have more Advantages to do all then all the World beside hath You best love and are best beloved by your Children You are nighest to them You have greatest power over them C. 5. Your Honour Pleasure and Profit is most concerned in your Childrens good More then other Mens is More than your own is in ought beside except your own Souls Salvation C. 6. You are they that have done your Children most hurt You propagated or derived Adams sin to them through you they received the Infection And by your own sins you make sad work for them too Who should help to save them if not you C. 7. You know too do you not that 't is by ill Education next to Original Corruption that the World is made such a Hell as ' t is And will you nevertheless give your Children no better Education Oh be not so unmerciful You begat them not Beasts oh do not breed them as such Mercy mercy have mercy on the Souls that must be Blessed or Miserable for ever And whose Life or Death seems next to Gods own hand in yours Help oh help poor Babes so weak And do not stay till your Help is nothing worth or much less then now To murder Souls and your own Childrens is fitter work for Divels then for you O lay not out Pounds for their Bodies for every Peny you lay out for their Souls O Pray O Labour O Wait till God say to each of you I will pour my Spirit upon thy Seed and my Blessing upon thy Off-spring They shall spring up as among the Grass as Willows by the water courses One shall say I am the Lords and another shall call himself by the name of Jacob and another shall subscribe with his hand unto the Lord and sirname himself by the name of Israel Isa 44.3 4 5. Be it known to as many as will not thus do they are notorious enemies of God the Church and the World And of their rotting names their Children will be forced to speak Lies or Nothing or Evil things The Speeches Laws and Actions of many Heathens which I may not here repeat shall one day shame them But I conclude with Prayer O God turn the Hearts of English Fathers to the Children and do not come and smite us with thy Curse Children exhorted to their Duties unto their Parents General Duties and Particular Motives to both In Prisons and upon the Gallows poor Miscreants do often exclaim that their ruin began in disobedience unto Parents Nor can it be doubted but Hell rings with the same complaint Hear the words of your Life dear Children Read ye these Lines as though they had been written with the finger of God before your eyes And you were called to by name in every Paragraph As sure as they are any words they are Gods word And his word unto you to all and every one of you And his word designed and qualified to help you keep all his whole word The fifth Command is a directory for keeping all of both Tables 1. Love your Parents most dearly Honour imports Love When Husbands are bid to give Honour to Wives as weaker Vessels they are bid to be tenderly affectionate towards them All do so construe it 1 Pet. 3.7 And when you are bid to Honour your Parents you are bid to Love them And so Love them as those to whom you are most engaged next to God himself You must love God much more If they put you upon any thing displeasing to God you must then shew that in comparison of God you do hate them Luke 14.26 That for Gods sake you can forget your Fathers House leave it and be glad to be out of it Psal 45.10 That in God's Cause you have Levi's courage read it Deut. 33.9 You must equally Love your Mothers and Fathers Fathers are put first Exod. 19. Mothers are put first Lev. 19.2 Ye shall fear every Man his Mother and his Father Both must be Loved best The Mother is the Fathers Inferior some ways but she is his equal as to their Children She is a Parent as well as he and much more painfully so God commands that she should have the same Love as he And the self-same Reward is promised to the Love of